In the trades, your tools are everything. You can't afford them breaking down on the job. Brunt makes tools you wear. Tough boots that are insanely comfortable right out of the box.
We work directly with people in the trades to develop each product at the best price. Try Brunt Risk Free with a 30-day on-the-job trial with free shipping and returns. And get $10 off your first order with code SXM. Go to BruntWorkWear.com.
Okay. I know some of you guys are tired of the intro music. Well, if you are, just listen to it again. Sorry, that's a little bit Muerto.
That's a little bit Muerto in that Spanish for death. Because you die in other countries too in Spain, Portugal, Africa. Everywhere you go, you die, brother. And that's the crazy part.
And I'm sorry to start us off like that. But that's not what's happening right now. Right now, we are in the live category. We're checking that live box.
If somebody passed you a note right now and it said, do you live? Yes or no? You would check yes. Because you're alive.
Sorry. I know some of you guys, it's a sentence almost you have to deal with. While some people seem to just be able to embrace it and just just be just just have joy. Just jumping out of their dang skin.
You know, just like joy is just repelling out of their armpits and just spelunking out of their nose, you know, constantly. And some people have that natural joy. That's what I call that, that natural joy, T and J. Not to be confused with TMJ, which is lock jaw and lock jaw is something you could get.
It was rabies little brother because I grew up, you know, a lot of people know in the rabies built, a lot of rabies, a lot of lice body bugs, you know, we had one fellow was always scratching his neck and they would have to, you know, put these almost making like a mummy because he was scratching his neck so much. Because he got the body bugs and people get different types of stuff, you know, and that's one thing that he got. But TMJ was also, it was, I think, something like lock jaw where you couldn't eat for a while. It was like a diet, but one that your basically your central nervous system enforced a diet on you and you couldn't open your mouth.
And that was something I remember my mother told me, be careful out there because you could get locked jaw. And especially around this time of year, you know, I find that October, you realize it's October? Do you realize you can eat candy all month long and nobody will judge you? You could be at a funeral and break out a snicker.
You know, a baby snicker and nobody's going to judge you heavily because that's natural because it's that time, you know, I mean, you could just, you know, you could crack open a pixie stick and bust a couple rails right up your snout, you know, like, like frickin like, like Coca-Luffagus, you know, like snorta Luffagus, bro, you could do a couple grams of great pixie powder and nobody's heavily going to judge you. And that's because it's Halloween time and Halloween always feel as, I mean, it's the best. I mean, you could dress up like a fucking ghost and go to Burger King tomorrow and people will just think that, you know, you're just trying to get a head start on the year. And we had a girl in our neighborhood that would go trick or treating year around.
And some people thought she was a mentally challenged, you know, maybe had a little speck of the Tism on her because I grew up in the Tism Belt as well. And that's basically a lot of the South and Midwest Tism is heavy, heavy out there, you know, Tism dips drips heavy, drips heavy in the genetic caverns out there, you know, it just drips off the ceiling and every now and then it drop catches somebody and they are, they are, you know, they get caught up their feelings and emotions in the way that they live their life gets caught up. And that's autism and everybody's got a little bit of it, you know, and I don't, I'm sure I had a splash hit me on the back, you know, when I was going through the genetic caverns into the universe and I got a touch, you know, because I'll see a lot of times autistic kids and they flare up kind of when I come by a little, you know, it's almost like if a dog hears something the distance and I'm not referring to autistic children as animals or autistic humans. I'm not doing that at all, but I'm saying that they'll have that same.
You ever see like a dog like if you, if a dog is far away and you make a sound and the dog looks, that's a lot of time what happened with me when I get around, people that have mental disabilities. Because they know that the thread in me is recently removed from the quilt that they're made of, that I'm partisan, that I'm partisan to whatever they got. And I've always thought that I've always felt a little bit on the people say on the spectrum, but I say on the, I don't want to say on the rainbow, but I say on the water slide of autism because it's a wild ride. But happy October guys, happy October 1st.
I, um, oh wait, it's October 2nd. It's October 2nd. I'm recording this on October 1st. I hope you had a good weekend, you know, I hope, you know, people got into the football.
We got some people that called in about that about some of the different kneeling, um, a lot of unique perspectives on it. And so we're going to rifle through some of those in a little bit. We got, uh, we got Ari Manus coming back in. I know people hate him.
Uh, some people love him. Uh, so we're just going to figure out, we got, we're going to try it again, a little bit of a flow. We can see how that goes and what else is going on in my world. I mean, recently I've been, I'll give you a sensual update.
I am, uh, I'm in seven days of no masturbation. And for me, that's good. And so I'm feeling pretty hopeful about that. One of my problems is a lot of times once I tell people I'm doing something, I screw it up, you know, like the second, like, you know, I'll say that to you guys, and I'll get excited.
I'll get caught up in my own hope. And then it just, you know, it's like a, that creates a bad recipe inside of me. That then somehow I end up, you know, you know, looking at masturbation or touching myself. And I don't want to be doing that anymore.
I don't want to be touching myself. Why? Because I'm an adult, you know, and I've been touched, trust me, I've been touched enough by myself. I've given myself enough, easy access to my wiener and to my body.
And so I think it's time, sometimes I start to cage myself up from myself and give a little bit more respect from my seat. What else? Oh, I'll watch this show, Last Chance U. I don't know if you've seen this, but I used to work over in, in Mississippi.
I worked on a farm over there for a couple of summers in a row, two, three summers. They're right on the, actually right on the Louisiana, Mississippi border. And this, this show on Netflix, Last Chance U is about mostly African American black boys that play football at a, at a school called Eastern Mississippi Community College. And it really kind of captures a little bit of that slow vibe that goes on in a lot of small towns.
If you get a chance, I'll heavily recommend that. It's a pretty good show. This past weekend, yeah, that October, I remember when I was young, doing Halloween was always a special time, you know, I remember in high school, eating mushrooms, you know, psychedelic mushrooms, little trips snacks, brain, mentos, basically mentos via soul. I mean, you, you pop a couple, I mean, the first time we went to get some mushrooms, I went with some kids who'd already gotten them before and so they were fired up.
And we went there and I'd never seen as many mushrooms in my entire life, not even at a grocery. And we got literally, we got probably half of a black, big black garbage bag full of mushrooms and we took them to a party. And at the party, people ate them. We went inside the party, people ate them.
And about an hour later, there was probably maybe 40 people at the party, an hour later, nobody was in the house, but everybody was still at the party. People were lost in the woods. People were trapped. Some people were trapped behind the swimming pool, even though there was no way to get trapped behind it because it was just a round pool.
People were playing hide and go seek with themselves. Two kids were in the bathroom and didn't know each other was in the bathroom. I mean, people were, I mean, you could just hear people's souls just jerking off in the distance. You know, it was like, I mean, it was just like bison.
We're just roaming through people's souls for the first time. And then Indians were showing up in hunting them. And that's what was going on. You could feel people shifting.
You could feel people shifting gears mentally and emotionally at the same time when people were bent out on the mushrooms on that Halloween. And then now we had a lot of mushrooms. So those went on for a few days and children were eating them and they, I remember dressing up like where's Waldo and I got a powdered sugar fight with a couple of people who I didn't know, which is fun at first. But anytime you're fighting with condiments, fun at first, violent at the end.
You know what I'm saying? Crack open a packet of mustard on somebody is cute for about 40 seconds and then shit escalates. You know, and next thing you know, you're trying to fucking hide a chunk of relish in people's tear ducts and shit. And that's when shit escalates.
But, but I remember a buddy of mine, this kid Todd drank some gasoline, high on mushrooms, he was jacked up on something, you know, and he, he fucked up at the service station, time saver. The service station by us used to be called time saver because I guess they assumed that if you stop there, you will save you a couple extra seconds. But old Todd, he really earned himself a couple of extra seconds in the hospital days, even from drinking the gasoline. But yeah, I had good times on Halloween.
I was where's Waldo one time. I was peppermint pet. Another time I got jacked up on, on some type of uppers and I was peppermint pet for Halloween. And it's really basically takes them long johns that are the pants and you take a long john shirts, which is just kind of the same material as the pants, but it's a shirt and you sew pepperments to it.
Just tie the pepperments, you know, all over it, get you a little hat, a little, excuse me, like a little beanie hat, hook a few pepper mints on the vet. And suddenly you get a cane, like a cane for a grandparent and you paint it red and white stripes. And suddenly you fucking peppermint pet, you know, and, and it's not even a character, but it is a character. People are like, who are you?
And it's like, I'm peppermint pet. You know what I'm saying? Let me hide a little bit of this mint up in that ass. You feel me?
Let me breath freshen that crotch. You feel me? So that was another costume that I had. Um, I remember this story, man.
This is the first time that I knew when I was young, my father lived with us and my father was really old, you know, and so we would go trick or treating. And my mother would take us. My mother had worked all day, you know, and so she got home and she was a lot of time frustrated and my dad would stay home. Excuse me, I have to clear my throat.
A lot of times you hear me clear my throat. You hear me. I make that sound because I got a big lip. You know, I got that, I got that, uh, that, uh, what is it?
I got that, uh, that's a chimney that tuna sashimi for the bottom lip. And so a lot of water and a lot of coagulates bunch up down there in the bottom of my lip, you know, I'm kind of bubble-gomping down there. And so, you know, a lot of time water buildup right there and I'd probably make a pearl if you gave me enough time. I'd probably make a pearl in my mouth.
I bet when I die, if the last person who comes by my body just pulls my lip down, they might find them a beautiful, um, uh, a beautiful, you know, uh, geological treat right there. And that's going to be a pearl because I got them coagulates, you know, my mouth kind of flows into this, this place where there's no way, way for the water to escape. So anyway, that's what I'm going on. If you hear me making sounds, that's the sounds I'm making.
There's people sometimes will call in or email some guy emailed one time. I can't listen to the podcast anymore. You know, he's always drinking your own spit. That's what he accused me of doing, drinking my own spit.
What are you talking about, dude? Like I'm like, like I'm an orphan in the Sahara. What do you mean drinking my own spit? Dude, I got a, I'm not going to drown, bro.
I'm not going to drown so you can have an easily listening atmosphere, you know? So every time you hear me making that sound, no, I'm surviving. Okay. That I want to be at other stages in my life.
You know, I'm not going to have my brother be at my funeral and say, Oh, my brother drowned out because he didn't want to swallow his spit because he had shame about it. I'm sorry. You know, different people make different sounds. Go put your ear up to your stepmother.
I bet she sounds like a piece of shit. Maybe some people step home to decent. Anyhow, onward. So I remember we had Halloween and my father would stay home and my father was old that time he was 76 years old, maybe 75.
And my mother would take a trick or treating. And I didn't realize at that time, yet, that my father was old. I didn't. I mean, I knew that he was like physically slower, but I guess I didn't realize, uh, I didn't really realize how he saw me.
You know, I didn't realize how he envisioned me or looked at me or if he did any differently because of his age. And I remember when we were trick or treating with my mom and my brother and I had gotten to fight. So we were, we were raggedy and, uh, and Andy and both of us, we both started out as Andy and then my brother beat my ass enough where I kind of look more like a raggedy and, um, you know, just my eye painted, gone out. My hair was sprayed out and my raggedy and outfit was all busted up, looked more like a dress.
So at that time, you know, I was showing up back at my door like a real batch, you feel them? And so we get back to our house. We go on trick or treating. We had a pretty decent time and then my mother with the four children, my sister and the stroller and we get back there and my brother and I run up to the door and my father came to the door and he looked at us and he went, he got the candy bowl and just said, you know, uh, take what you want, you know, and that's when he didn't realize it was us.
He didn't realize it was his own children. And that was like the first moment that like, I guess I realized that maybe my dad just couldn't relate to me that well, even just because of his age, like, he just didn't, you know, maybe dads forget, I mean, my dad had just seen me, you know, an hour earlier when I left, you know, my brother and I were in our costumes and stuff, but I remember getting back to the door and he didn't know it was us. And I just remember feeling this, this, this disconnect immediately, this like this, it wasn't like a feeling of, of pain, but it was this feeling immediately where I understood where, where we were in relation to each other. Like I knew immediately there was this divide where he just didn't, there may be, like he could confuse me with other kids that, you know, he didn't remember things that well, that there was just this immediately, there was this element that, and probably at that age too, that, you know, he didn't recognize me, you know, there was probably a lot of fear that said him like internally then, you know, this feeling that, you know, maybe he couldn't protect me or something.
If he didn't know I was his own, there might have been some, you know, nocturnal animalistic vibes going on, but, uh, but that was one moment that it really shook me and I was like, wow, you know, um, you know, my dad is, is, he's old. You know, he doesn't know that my brother and I standing here, you know, who don't have mass on, who have, you know, like headbands that have like yarn and stuff and are looking a certain way, um, that he doesn't realize that we're his sons. And that was kind of a wild moment for me not to bring down the, the town, you know, I'm not trying to drown the town here in, uh, in inner saltwater, you know, I'm not trying to, you know, put the saline in the, in your eye holes, but, uh, but yeah, just reminding me that that was another thing that happened in Halloween. Let me think of some other Halloween that I went to.
Um, I, they had this, my mother had a station wagon and a station wagon was something that it was like a van, but for straight up real ass moms. It was like a SUV. It was like the original SUV. Like now they got these SUVs with all this room and this and that the station wagon, that thing was like 50 feet long.
Like your mom could be driving and you could be so far in the back that you were a couple minutes behind her in time. Like if you asked your mother what time it was, she would have said 1144. And if somebody were to ask you what time it was, you just said 1141 because you were living in the past, that back seat was so far. And man, it was fun in that station wagon, you know, you could talk all the smackers, your mother could never reach you.
These SUVs, they got reachable children in them. You could catch an ass whooping if your mother got long arms, if your mother's Nigerian, you know, if your mother's from Kenya, you might get your ass beat, even if you're just sitting into the back. But what would that do with that, with the station wagon? Man, your mother could put you in there.
You could be back there so long, you could start a family, you know, she opened the door next time she opens the door, you pop out with a husband and a, and a, you know, and just freshly back a tan because you just got back from your honeymoon. It was that kind of thing. You could feel like you were back there forever in your own universe. And I loved my mother's station wagon.
But on Halloween, she would put the tailgate down and we get a couple of local kids. And, and, and they would, we would stand on the back of the tailgate and hold on to this bar. The tailgate was down, we'd stand on that and hold on to this bar that was at the top of the station wagon and my mother would drive. She'd take us to the nice neighborhoods so you could get that candy, you know, because rich people had the candy.
I mean, you showed up at some poor people's house, people, you know, I remember this one dude. What was that guy's name? Cutment, Mr. Cutment.
He would blow weed smoking your face and blow drug smoke at you. And that was his big Halloween thing. So when we were young, we didn't get into that much, but as we got a little bit older, it was fun to hit his door because he cracked that door and just blow you a hit of that, that dope smoke at you, you know, trick or treat boy. That shit was trick or trauma, dude.
One year that shit hit me right in the nostrils, dude. Now it's bent out. Now it's bent out. Well, I was ghosting, dude.
I had goonies in my head, bro. I had goonies in my head, man. But that was a good time, I remember. And so anyway, we'd be on the station wagon and that tailgate would be down.
I'm other would be cruising. And the fun thing to do when you saw that open yard coming up was to run and jump off. Like we were in the Air Force, you know, 101st Airborne Division and no offense if I'm getting that wrong. I don't want to offend anybody on her in that sense.
But you get what I'm saying. We'd run and jump right off that tailgate. All right, all right, all right, all right, all right, you know, throw my somebody throw my sister off, you know, and everybody just hitting the grass and then everybody would get up and make sure they had all their candy, half the candy roll out of the end of the yard. But it was dark.
You didn't know you'd get your bag and run to the door. Then you'd hit a string of houses and then get back on the tailgate and off around the next street, you know, mother would go around and we'd jump off, you know. So this one boy, man, one time we're going, man, and my buddy, my buddy Danny, and I've talked about him before and he, you know, very slender neck. I mean, his neck, if it was made out of anything, it was turkey bacon.
And so he was long, you know, and long people, they're out there. You're more likely to catch a cold. My dad always told me you're more likely to catch a cold when you're long because there's more of you. You know, if I'm only 20 inches tall, there's only 20 inches of me where a cold can land.
But if I'm 27 inches tall, I'm a little longer than those molecules or those, you know, those viral antibodies or bodies that are floating around, they can land, there's more room for them to land, you know, like I'm telling you, it's easier to land on Saturn than it is on Pluto because there's more space. That's what I'm saying. So my boy, Danny was long and he went running off and we were one, two were jumping off the tailgate, hitting the yard, you know, rolling over, running up and Danny goes run and do jumped and hit, literally landed right onto a fire hydrant that was in somebody's yard, man. And I heard a sound come out of that boy.
It didn't come out of his voice box. It didn't come out of, it was almost like his bone marrow just let out a fucking shriek, like his bone marrow let out a shriek. And that's when I knew that nighttime was dangerous, man, that the devil lurked sometimes on Halloween. He was never the same.
He was never the same before that. But he was definitely, he was double, never the same after he just jumped sheer darkness and just caught that fire hydrant just to the whole neck and body. You know, and the crazy thing is you could pop that hydrogen open and run water across them forever and he would never get back to normal. But it is fall, it is autumn and happy Halloween, you guys, we're gonna be right back.
Just a second. I got, I got already Madison studio. I got in just a new way we're gonna use him. I got a plan bear with me.
We got a few calls that came in about the NFL. We got a guy who's got some pubic hair reconfiguration, something, and we got a couple more things. We'll be right, we'll be right back. Just give me one second because somebody just rang the door.
I gotta see who it is. All right. But yeah, it's that time of year. It's the time of year where things are fresh.
October, I think is a great month to rattle off the things you want to get done that have been plaguing you all year, set a few goals, knock them out before Turkey time and before Christmas. Because if you put your ear, stick your neck out a little. Now stick it out a little bit further. What do you hear?
I'll tell you what you fucking hear, boy and girl, you hear a Turkey with a jingle bell around his neck and that's holidays coming fast, dude. And if you don't think the holidays are coming fast, go outside, bend over and I'll tell you this for you know what's going on. You will have a damn pilgrim with a fucking sack full of new toys hiding in your ass because that's what I'm telling you the holidays are coming quick. And we got a great episode for you guys, man.
I'm excited. I didn't have that crazy of a weekend, so I'm just kind of leave that right there. You know, I spent some time. I go to therapy on Mondays.
I'm ready to spend some time with my therapist. I'm trying to get you know through tonight's episode so that I can get some rest and be prepared. Sometimes I go to this therapy session. I'm not prepared, you know, but I go to adult therapy for males because I know worse.
And if you're having problems, if you're having problems, you're feeling some emasculation issues. I want you to hit the hotline 985-664-9503. I want you to hit the hotline with some of the ways that you're feeling as a man. If you're having a tough time being a man, it could be in any facet.
Hit the hotline. You don't even need to leave your name if you don't want to. But just make sure your story's real. We got some great calls that came in.
We got a couple people calling about taking a knee. The NFL, we got a couple of amazing perspectives on that. We got, we're talking about why we don't have camels in America. We're talking about a follow-up call from a gentleman who, you know, we talked about it last week about what would be the price be that you would let your loved one get out there and do sex with a stranger.
An expensive stranger. A stranger that's got some money. You know, the rich. How much would you just let the rich just plow into your loved one?
And we got a call that came in about that. We got some great calls. A man got hair transplants from a place you probably wouldn't even expect. And you heard the doorbell a little bit ago.
That's gonna be Ari Manus is gonna be back here and he's gonna be in studio. But the time when he's not in here, he's not in here. This is our time. And this isn't is it isn't the time that I share with him.
This is our time. And the time when I tell you he's not in here. He's not in here. So I just want that to be known.
A couple of other things before we move on the program. I want to let you know that I am headlining the Hollywood Improv October 10th at 8 p.m. I got about we can do about 45 minutes. Hot new material.
Cool stuff. You're gonna love it. You can find those tickets on my website theovon.com as well. I got the Hampen A&EZ the tour shirts are available now at theovon.com slash store.
And those have all the tour dates on it from this past year. It's kind of a neat shirt. It's a few dollars price here because I get a couple extra colors put on it. But but it's a cool shirt man.
And I think it's nice to have if you want to get that you can go get it. It's from it has every city that I performed in this past year. And what else? Oh I got a new series that's gonna be that we're working on a pilot for Comedy Central.
So I'm excited about that. There's no money in it yet but it's gonna be a neat opportunity. And and it's all a little bit based on this podcast. So that's kind of exciting.
But I just want to thank you guys for being here with me today. Happy Monday or whatever day it is this week you're listening. And we're gonna be right back. We're gonna have Ari Madison studio.
We're gonna check on him briefly. Hit a couple of news topics. And then you and I are gonna get back to some of your calls. I'll be right back.
This past weekend. All right and that is everything that you need to know. Also if you want to support the Patreon you can go to patreon.com slash theovon. T-H-E-O-V-O-N options on there to donate.
Thank you so much to our patreon supporters. I really appreciate it allowing me to get a new camera. And eventually the goal is to come out with a Thursday episode that better reflects responses from Monday's Monday's episode. But with that said here's a couple of thoughts.
Ari I'd say keep them on. The one thing I would say though is just and you haven't been a little bit funnier. Hey Theo this is Ivan. Love your show.
As far as Ari is concerned for someone that you want to have with you all the time. Just pick someone that you enjoy being around and someone is professional and someone is professional. Be a little bit funnier and someone is professional. Be a little bit funnier.
I don't know why I did that. You did that. I would never do that. You did do that.
You're lying. Now lying to me and you're lying to all your fans. There's a glitch I think. That was not a glitch.
Okay fine. There wasn't a glitch man. Those are two comments. It is kind of there's a couple of calls that I got in.
You know and I didn't. You said we weren't gonna bring up comments again. You said we were just gonna skip past that and just go into the pockets. You said we're not gonna talk about it anymore.
We weren't. But then you just played it. Yeah it's on the play sheet. Yeah but you said to me before I said hey are we gonna keep going over the negative comments or we just move on.
You said oh yeah no we're past that. We are past it. And then you just brought it up again. But I wanted to make sure you're past it.
I was until you just brought it up again. Now I'm back in it. Now I'm back in. I mean the funnier thing.
Fine. You know comedy subjective. Yes. I didn't think I was funny.
Some guys. Well that guy. Yeah. Some people did.
Some people did. The professional thing. First off I feel like I'm a professional. And then secondly you making that little mixtape.
I was. That's a mix that you made an REHAT mix. You're my friend. You made an REHAT mix tape.
It's a remix of a couple of albums. Okay a remix. You made an REHAT remix. Okay.
Which makes me think that you think I'm unprofessional. No. You think I'm unprofessional. Not at all.
That's why I was gonna actually. If you don't let me gather my thoughts on what I was gonna contradict what some of these guys are saying. I don't think you were. Really?
No. What do you think I was gonna let you just drown out there in the dirty water. I was letting me out here to drown. It's okay.
I guess that's what people want these days for entertainment. No. I mean it's very Rome. It's very Rome these days in the podcast world.
You know they want to see you get killed by a lion. Yeah. Fight a thousand squirrels. You know there were some men though they didn't have a lion that we get thousands of squirrels to fight men.
Do you know that? I did not know that. Yeah. Is that true?
Yeah. That's crazy. You're not pulling out of something you think might be true? No.
No. Not at all. It's a real thing. All right.
Cool. Well here he is guys. Ari Man is right here. And what I want to say is what's going on in Ari's world.
I just want to do a check in with Ari. So you know life's good. Me and my girlfriend we made up. Yeah.
Last week check you guys just made love after the Grand Canyon. Yeah we've gotten back together at the Grand Canyon. Things were a little shaky. I think we're on we're on good terms.
We went to San Diego together. Oh that's cool. What was the occasion weekend? It was my younger brother Jonah's birthday and I lined up some shows as well.
So I was doing some comedy and I was going to visit my 17 year old at 18 now. Wow. Wow. And so we celebrated by going to the whorehouse in Tijuana, Mexico.
Really? Yeah. They hung con. You ever been there?
I've never been there. Did you take Jonah? No. Jonah stayed behind.
Even though he was allowed to go. Yes. 18 in Mexico. 18.
You're allowed to fuck course. Oh you're allowed to get murdered. You're allowed to do anything. Yeah.
But no this was just me my girlfriend and one of my buddies another comedian who was on the show. Okay. And yeah. So we went and I've been there four or five times.
Now I love the place. You just go there. $80. You could just you know have your way with a woman of your job.
Wow. And now do you feel any like emotional repercussions from that? You walk out of there feeling like you know this isn't good for me or this isn't good for my psyche or something like that. You just feel you know honestly the first time I walked out of there.
Yeah. I felt it was cool. It was like I can't believe this place exists. Yeah.
Yeah. Because I mean prostitution here exists but it's this really shady internet secret grimy dangerous maybe. Yeah. You gotta like feel high in a recycling band and just wait till some kind of you know.
Yeah. There's a tip all around. They're not called prostitutes. They're called escorts.
There's all these rules. Yeah. And they do a background check here. It's this legal establishment.
Nice establishment. In fact. What is it like? Like a CVS?
Is it like a ready? Is it like a 24 hour medical center? What vibe is it? It's kind of just like the nicest strip club I've ever been to.
I've only been a couple strip clubs. Okay. In the US. And is it well lit?
How's the lighting in there? It's lit kind of like a bar. So it's not super bright but it's not dark. You could definitely see around.
There's $4 beers. There's three stories. There's Jacuzzis or stripper poles. There's women.
There's people drinking. There's parties. Bachelor parties. Friends hanging out at tables drinking beers.
And so you walk in there and there's just all these women lined up up and down. Probably I'd say over a hundred. Can you smell crotch in the air when you walk in there? Honestly?
Be honest. You don't smell crotch. What you smell is cleaner cleaner. Yeah.
Clean products. And it's I forget the name of it. But there's is. Is it scented in any way?
Like orange cleaner? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah. It's kind of confusing. It's kind of exciting.
Yeah. Yeah. It's really, really. go in there and you do it.
I've been there three or four times. Now were you nervous when you walk in? Because I would be extremely nervous in there. I was only nervous this time, because I'm with my girlfriend.
Okay. And she says she's cool with it. She's like, I don't care. They're just prostitutes.
They're not cheating on me. If we go here, she even, she was thinking she would get into it. She goes, I'd be down to watch you have sex with a prostitute. Wow.
And I think that could be, you know, kind of hot and fun. Yeah. It's very, it's very, it's very Lake of the Ozarks Missouri. That's Swinger Country.
If you never spent time on Lake, it was great. Oh yeah. And I wandered into a Swinger's weekend up there one time on accident. Yeah, I did do a partake.
No, I couldn't do anything. I could watch the bingo that they played. And then I wasn't supposed to get in the elevator from like 11 to 1 AM, because it was basically just like a f**k trolley just going up and down the building. But I did press the button one time and the door's open.
And there was just a brother in there just putting down the hammer on some older white women. But anyway, go on. So we go in there. She's drinking a little bit more than me.
Okay. I get sucked up, which made me think she's uncomfortable. Yeah. And that made me a little uncomfortable.
And I kind of just got this vibe that she was just pretending to be into this whole experience. Yeah. To be cool. Yeah, to be the cool girlfriend that is letting me have sex with the prostitute.
So I didn't end up doing it. I ended up not partaking. It'd feel like a gang. Like, is that that one when you say that the cool girlfriend that's letting me have sex with the prostitute, that makes me think like gang, like somebody that's in a gang.
Like she's in a gang? No. Like, you know, like, this is also type of gang type of that seems like something happens in gangs, you know, like, I'm going to bang your friend, you know, you stay here. You have the snack or something.
I'm going to bang your friend, you know, like. Sounds like you know more about gangs than I do. But the initiation type stuff and the girls probably play along with stuff to seem cool and comfortable, you know? Yeah, it just felt like maybe because we were on weird turns from our last fight.
And she wanted to be like, who takes a girlfriend to the great gets in a fight at the Grand Canyon and it make up for it. Takes them down to a hooker house in Tijuana. Yeah, it was just one of those things we I've talked about hookers on stage. Sometimes she knows I had been there.
I'm open about my life and anybody there know you when you got there? No, but I did actually see one of the prostitutes I had prior experience with, but she did not remember me at all or really noticed me. And do your girlfriend? Did you tell your girlfriend you've been with that woman?
I did. Wow. I got that one last time. And she was like, Oh, cool.
And so I don't think that bothered her. I were fine from from this whole experience. Nothing affected our relationship from this. I think mainly though, because I was keen enough and I picked up on the fact that she didn't really want me to do it and she didn't really want to see that.
And I felt that so because I'm a gentleman and because I care about her, I decided, Hey, I don't want to I said, I don't really want to do this. I said, You're prettier than all these girls. You're much more be which is true. Yeah, she is prettier than all those girls.
Yeah, it's pretty late. And I said, we don't need to do this. We got some delicious street tacos right outside of Mexican taco truck there and right outside. Yeah, right outside the whore house.
There's this taco truck got a whole plate of tacos for bucks together together. We picked out it was delicious. Wow. And we got back to my parents house, 4am, crashed out on the air mattress.
Woke up, go back here. Unbelievable, dude. Yeah, it's almost like a modern day Romeo and Juliet. Yeah, except better.
Interesting. Ari Manus. I appreciate that checking man. I appreciate you letting us know what's going on.
Yeah. Why don't you leave this in a couple of news categories? First category, speaking of sex, semen contaminated flutes might have been given to children. So the California school officials warn that several school districts in Southern California, they were flute donation, musical donation from this man, I guess, started an organization called Flutes Across the World.
And now they think that the flutes he donated and he also drugged off onto and then gave them to kids. Wow. I mean, that's, how are they going to know? It's said in the story, they don't know how this came, how they found out, but someone found out.
But there's semen everywhere. Like it's like when you walk into a motel or a hotel or an abandoned building, you know, when you find a stray dog, you know, like you go look on YouTube and there's people out there spending way inaccurate time with animals, you know, it's like there's semen on everything. We're made out of semen. When you think about it, everybody wants to walk around and act like, you know, it's this taboo product, you know, like it's something that people are, you know, secretly busing in from China or something or from Korea.
We're semen. You are semen, dude. I agree with what you're saying 100%. So a little on a flute, but some kid who's even more recently of seed than us, I just, uh, who are they going to say?
I'm sure they'll probably say Trump did. No, they think the guy who donated the flutes did it. But also doing, well, you know what that unsurprised me. I got that as a bunch of flutes.
Yeah. Seems like a guy that probably is jerking off on the stuff. First of all, if you know anybody that has more than one flute, uh, I'd phone them in right now, bro. And the number to call for that is 911.
I said you get what you pay for. They took these free flutes. Yeah. They're free flutes.
You can't be complaining about if you don't want semen on your flutes, then buy brand new flutes on Amazon. But if you're going to take these donated flutes, yeah, you get what you pay for. Yeah, that's the thing. You want a handful of free marbles, dude?
They smell like the inside of my ass. You know what? That's life, dude. That's God's plan for us right now.
Um, all right. Speaking of that, that's the news. Here we go. Uh, here we go.
And the, and the number is 985-649-503. You can always hit the hotline with any thoughts, comments, concerns or questions. Um, let's tap into this right here. What, uh, this Jeff Toei?
Jeff Toei. Asian? Jeff Toei? You're thinking of Joe Koi.
Mm. This isn't a response to the hair transplant that I got that almost, uh, 14 days ago. You're not man, but it wasn't on my dome. It was on my face.
So, you know, I have grown a beard. I got that engine in me. And that means Native American. I don't think he's talking about him.
But he, um, and I know what he's talking about. Actually, there's a, there's part of my throat. It's almost like a choke mark where I swear on my other choke name when I was young that will not grow hair. Yeah, I can't grow a full beard.
Yeah. So it, yeah, that thing is way shotty, dude. Okay. Well, no, that actually doesn't ring in me down.
I bet, dude. You know what it doesn't look that bad. It looks like scruff. Some chicks like that.
It looks like, uh, like you've been kind of living in New York, but outdoors. Yeah. And my family and, uh, so I can't grow. I can't grow a lot of facial hair.
Okay, guy. Well, let's get to it. So, you know, if you grow like a chin beard or a neck beard, you know, the hairs are a little greasy. Chin beard and neck beard look a lot like pews.
They do. And, uh, so I'm actually going through the procedure right now of getting some pews. I got plenty of those, uh, transported to my face. Now, a little worry though.
I asked for your prayer requests. Just want to let you know, let you know that you're not alone in this, uh, God bless you. Wow. It took it to the Lord at the end.
And I've been at Halloween before where we, you know, we needed beards and stuff and we would cut off pubes and each other's pubes because some people had better stock and use that to make our beards and mustaches for Halloween, um, you know, outfits. Uh, what do you think about this guy? What do you think about this? Are you, uh, about getting that transplant?
If this is real, to me, that sounds like a prank phone call. Really? I thought about it. I don't think it does.
You say you think it's real. So if he's really getting his pubes, uh, to his neck, he's transplanting his pubes and moving them to his neck. I think there's a bigger issue. Why is he so insecure about not being able to grow a beard?
Right. Just shave your face. Just don't be a beard guy. Just be a, a shaven man.
You know, I mean, it's just an old prison trick. Like in prison, a lot of times, if you read a lot of these old like prison diaries and stuff and you can get a lot of these in the deep way, which is just like, they've, um, they've digitized prison diaries and you can read about the things they did at Halloween. And a lot of the things they did was use different types of body stuff that they had, even dandruff that they would collect all year to, um, make different types of costumes and stuff like that. That's pretty interesting to hear, you know, like a guy would be like, um, you know, Tony Montana, but it would be like, you know, four or five, six people's dandruff that he would use to make the cocaine stream coming out of his face.
You know, and it's almost, it's almost spooky that way. You know, when you leave the house with four people's dandruff glued to your cheek, you know, and your cousin and a pubic mustache made out of your cousin grew for you. You know, that's Rochester, New York right there. It'd be a little bit funnier.
Oh, this is broken. No, it's not broken. It'd be a little bit funnier. I'm called.
Yeah. All right. I guess I forgive you. Thanks for having me on buddy.
And I'll be right back in just a second with, uh, we're going to get into the rest of these calls. We got some great ones this past weekend. Okay. And we are back with Ari Manus is out of here.
Um, you know, I think we're just going to continue to try this for another week, at least. See how it fits with Ari. Um, I liked him, you know, I like checking in with his life to see what's going on. And I like, uh, I like having a couple of news segments that I don't have to think about and prepare so it can be kind of fresh to me.
But let's, let's get into some of your calls. We had a lot of great calls about the NFL and a lot of great calls about, uh, the sitting, um, taking a knee. The, the national anthem issues. And, and I thought a little bit more about it over this past week.
And I think everybody did, because it's something that's, you know, that's in the air, you know, and certainly, um, in the past few years, I find myself thinking a lot more like, what are my like thoughts innately and feelings innately towards people that are different than me? You know, where do I stand? What do I think? What do I feel?
I find myself doing that more. And I think that that's great. Uh, awareness is, awareness is eventually key, uh, in every aspect of your life. But what I'm also noticing is, and hearing about that, the take a knee thing was very vague.
It was like, okay, we'll, we're upset at, um, at, uh, racial injustice. Then we're upset at Trump and then we're, like, it's a police brutality. It was like, well, what's it for? You know, I understand it's for different things, but it was just, this is the first year that I really felt like it was, you know, it just seemed because if you, if you, it almost started to make it so that the awareness stuff is starting to lose some of its effect.
That's what I felt like. It's every week and every day, if you keep saying, oh, this is about awareness, this, this batch of cupcakes is about, uh, black lives matter. This, this, uh, this casserole is for, um, uh, DACA repeal. This, if every, it just, it gets to be overwhelming so that nothing is for anything.
Because if you're saying that everything is something, then nothing is for anything, you know, it's like it just wears it out. And I think people are starting to get worn out. And I've noticed from different friends of mine that, that there just, there seems to be this vibe that people are just tired of hearing constantly about blame, you know, if you want to blame white people forever about the issues of the world, then you can start in Britain, you know, the civilization, humanity civilization apparently began in Africa and Egypt, I think. So if you want to go all the way back to there, keep on going.