27 | Why Healing Doesn't Feel the Way You Expected

Have you ever caught yourself thinking, "I seem okay on the outside... but inside I'm still struggling"?After narcissistic abuse, emotional control, betrayal, or a high-conflict separation, many women find themselves functioning long before they feel healed.You're going to work, looking after the kids, handling responsibilities, showing up for everyone else, and from the outside it might seem like you've moved on.But underneath? You're still carrying grief, triggers, confusion, anger, and moments that knock the wind out of you.In this episode of The Messy Middle, Erica explores the uncomfortable feeling that you're somehow "faking" your healing because the version the world sees doesn't always match what's happening inside. She unpacks why functioning is often mistaken for recovery, how societal pressure can make you feel like you should be "over it by now," and why healing is never as neat or linear as people expect.You'll learn:Why healing and functioning are not the same thingHow shame and unrealistic timelines keep women judging their own recoveryWhy feeling triggered doesn't mean you've gone backwardsThe difference between processing and being stuckHow real healing often shows up in quiet, subtle waysWhy you can be moving forward and still be affected at the same timeIf you've been wondering whether you're doing recovery "wrong" because you're still having hard days, this episode is your reminder that healing isn't a performance, a personality, or a finish line. It's messy, layered, unpredictable, and completely human.You are not faking it.You're simply in the middle of it.📩 Send in YOUR questions and get them answered on the podcast!📢 Get a Laster Coaching call for only $150. A 45-minute session to get to know me, experience my approach, and receive a personalized plan to kickstart your healing journey. Perfect for testing the waters before diving deeper.🎬 Watch Unfu*kwithable Boundaries Masterclass for FREE. Learn how setting clear boundaries can change your life for good and where to start! 📝 Get the Somatic Keys Course. Learn how to recognize your signals, regulate your responses, and reclaim your nervous system as a place of truth.