This is optimal living daily Weak Communication Habits yous Should Shed by Isaac Morehouse of isaacmorhouse.com, and I'm Justin Mollik. Welcome back to the podcast where I read an article to you every day of the year with permission from the authors. I'm gonna keep it up, so let's get right to it as we optimize your life. Weak Communication Habits you Should Shed by Isaac Morehouse of isaacmorhouse.com There are small ways that good people can damage their reputation and social capital with their communication.
The obvious culprits of bad grammar, typos, spelling errors, or too much text are of course important to avoid. But there are a few other communication habits that can hurt just as much but get little attention. All of these habits share in common a lack of clarity, resolve, and what Napoleon Hill would call definiteness of purpose. There they signal doubt, weakness, a divided mind, and leave the recipient with ambiguity.
Avoid them the I'm not sure if I'm serious Sentence Ending I've been seeing a lot of HAHA and LOL these days, creeping into everything from Facebook comments to professional email exchanges. I'm not a language purist, nor do I espouse formal writing over a laid back and conversational approach. The problem with ending sentences with lolz or some other silly word is not that it's too conversational, it's that it's bad conversation. I've had several email or text exchanges like this.
How did the interview go? Went really well, I think. Though I think I struggled a little on the first question. Hahaha.
If this were a verbal conversation, the HAHA would be equally uncomfortable. I imagine someone looking down at their shoes with a muffled laugh. What does it mean? Did you struggle or not?
Why has your clearly stated opinion with a haha? Someone who gives a sheepish chuckle after everything they say comes across as lacking confidence and doubting their own words. Say what you want to say. It can be serious or controversial or funny, but just say it and don't back away from it with a vague textual giggle.
The indecisive Meeting time Person wanting a phone call or meeting hey, I'd love to talk for 20 minutes about my project with you. Would you be up for it? Me? Sure.
I'm flexible. Anytime after 11am on Wednesday and Thursday next week, pick a time and send me an invite. Cool. I'm around both of those times and free all day.
Give me a call. This one makes me near apoplectic. Email exchanges aren't free. Neither is calendar carving and scheduling.
I clearly gave two windows of time and specifically asked for a 120 minute slot to be chosen. Why? Why didn't you just send me a specific time, preferably as a calendar invite? And what does it mean?
I'm free all day for a call? Really? You'll literally pick up an answer no matter when I call? You won't be in the bathroom at all that day or on the phone with anyone else I know you won't actually be free every minute.
And if I call and you don't pick it up? Now we gotta start the scheduling process all over again. Pick a time. Give it to me.
Stick to it the Response to Immaterial Items while ignoring the main question A good rule of thumb is to not make more than one ask in a single communication or what you really want could get overlooked. It seems even an email with a single ask can fail to communicate the main point if you're sending it to a vague communicator. I've learned to eliminate as much small talk or bits of detail from emails as possible. Not just because it saves me time, but because some people will respond to things that demand no response and seemingly forget about the important part.
Sorry to lay response. I was out of the country for my anniversary. I agree with your assessment of the article and I would just add that it needs a tighter opening. What do you think is the main point you're trying to drive home?
Discombobulated communicator oh wow, that sounds really cool. Where did you travel? Hope it was warmer than the weather we've been having here. Lol.
No, I'm not emailing you about my travels or the weather. I'm emailing you about the article you're working on. Was this a quick social response while you think things over to give me a more in depth response to my actual question later? If so, why didn't you tell me that?
Am I supposed to remove this email from my inbox and move on? Or do I need to respond to your non response and re ask the question? Find the core reason for my communication and respond to that before thinking about anything else. The Failure to switch Methods Sometimes I get messages via Facebook or LinkedIn.
Typically my first response includes my email address with an explicit ask that we move the conversation to email. This ask alone ends many conversations. I'm not sure why, but a lot of people's desire to get their question answered is so weak that they won't even endure the cost of switching email. Why ask it in the first place?
We're still the person responds okay or doesn't respond at all, then proceeds to lay off the entire discussion on the platform I just asked to move away from. I've asked three times in some threads and still had to request ignored. Some people even go so far as to call me unannounced and unscheduled. Telephone is my absolute least favorite form of communication, even after I told them explicitly in past conversations that I always prefer email unless absolutely necessary, and if a call is warranted, I'd rather schedule it.
Respect the medium or if it's not boring enough to switch, don't start the conversation in the first place. The earlier in the Thread Amnesia if a long email chain has lain dormant for six months, it's acceptable to ask for a quick recap on some past points. But in the span of a few days when a multi email thread has been going back and forth, it sends a bizarre signal when you ask a question already answered or make a point that completely ignores earlier portions of the discussion. Refresh yourself on the thread before each response.
If wording is unclear, ask. Don't assume the solution. Be definite. None of these bad habits are about writing ability or subject matter mastery.
They seem to me to reflect a lack of confidence or a lack of focus, or a lack of respect for other people's time and mental energy, or a lack of respect for your own time, or an avoidance of accountability to your own words or or just laziness. I'm not entirely sure, but I do know that they make the person you're communicating with tired, which will make them think twice before texting you about an opportunity, because they know the conversational cost is high and it might end with a lack of clarity about next steps. Decide what you want to say. Say it.
Mean it. Respond to the core question first. Respond in the manner requested. Respond promptly and consistent with prior communications.
Don't start a conversation you're not willing to drive to the finish. You just listened to the post titled Weak Communication Habits yous Should Shed by Isaac Moorhouse of isaacmorhouse.com, and I'll be right back with my commentary. I'm constantly thinking about how to optimize my health, what supplements to take hours of sleep, what my diet should focus on. Superpower finally takes the guessing out of it.
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You say something you believe, but you feel a little insecure about it, or you're worried about how it will be received, so you add that little laugh at the end. I do this a lot for sure. I'm generally a shy introvert, after all. See, I'm adding a laugh right there.
That's why I bring it up. It's something to be aware of. We're trying to soften the statement a little bit, and that's a way of protecting ourselves and actually almost making fun of ourselves before someone else gets the chance to so if you've been bullied in the past, maybe you're more likely to do this. Not 100% sure, but it won't surprise me.
It's then like if someone comes back at us or disagrees or whatever, it doesn't feel like such a direct rejection or attack. We already did it to ourselves. Really. Again, protection, but not great, because it really does undermine what we're trying to say and shows a lack of confidence.
If someone is asking how many sales you have and you say 100 with a little laugh at the end, I'd probably assume you're selling something pretty cheap and aren't confident in yourself and your sales. But say completely straight and confidently, well, then maybe each sale is worth $10,000. Or maybe it's houses worth millions of. It's a good one to think about.
So thank you Isaac, and thank you. Appreciate you being here and listening every day. Have a great rest of your day and I'll see you tomorrow where your optimal life awaits.