What Is It Like Trying To Date Gen Z Guys? - Sara Saffari - #679 episode artwork

EPISODE · Sep 11, 2023 · 1H 4M

What Is It Like Trying To Date Gen Z Guys? - Sara Saffari - #679

from Modern Wisdom · host Chris Williamson

Sara Saffari is a fitness model, influencer, athlete and a YouTuber. Many young people dream of being young, fit, and famous. Lots of us are seduced by the idea of the attention this brings, but what's the reality of being so exposed in a world filled with scrutiny, stalkers and haters? Expect to learn what Sara thinks about the muscle mommy movement, what makes women genuinely attractive, the biggest problem with dating Gen Z boys, Sara’s thoughts on the Bradley Martyn vs Logan Paul fight, Sara’s top 10 exercises to build muscle, whether she would ever start an Only Fans and much more... Timestamps: (00:00) The Muscle Mommy Movement (03:51) Sara’s Experience of Rapid Growth (09:20) TikTok Girls Catching Guys Watching Them in the Gym (16:50) What Are Gen-Z Guys Like to Date? (22:10) Do Girls Have Many Positive Role Models? (25:16) Sara’s Brad V Logan Prediction (32:57) If Sara Could Only Keep 10 Exercises (37:10) How Exercise Can Help with Mental Health Difficulties (44:16) Dealing with Business as a Fitness Influencer (51:43) Is There a Temptation to Post Over-Sexualised Content? (1:03:14) What’s Next for Sara? Extra Stuff: Get my free reading list of 100 books to read before you die: https://chriswillx.com/books Try my productivity energy drink Neutonic: https://neutonic.com/modernwisdom Episodes You Might Enjoy: This Is How To Master Your Life - David Goggins - #577: ⁠⁠⁠lnkfi.re/SN-Goggins⁠⁠⁠ How To Destroy Your Negative Beliefs - Dr Jordan Peterson - #712: ⁠⁠⁠lnkfi.re/SN-Peterson⁠⁠⁠ The Secret Tools To Hack Your Brain - Dr Andrew Huberman - #700: ⁠⁠⁠lnkfi.re/SN-Huberman⁠⁠ - Get In Touch: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chriswillx Twitter: https://www.twitter.com/chriswillx YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/modernwisdompodcast Email: https://chriswillx.com/contact - Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Sara Saffari is a fitness model, influencer, athlete and a YouTuber. Many young people dream of being young, fit, and famous. Lots of us are seduced by the idea of the attention this brings, but what's the reality of being so exposed in a world filled with scrutiny, stalkers and haters? Expect to learn what Sara thinks about the muscle mommy movement, what makes women genuinely attractive, the biggest problem with dating Gen Z boys, Sara’s thoughts on the Bradley Martyn vs Logan Paul fight, Sara’s top 10 exercises to build muscle, whether she would ever start an Only Fans and much more... Timestamps: (00:00) The Muscle Mommy Movement (03:51) Sara’s Experience of Rapid Growth (09:20) TikTok Girls Catching Guys Watching Them in the Gym (16:50) What Are Gen-Z Guys Like to Date? (22:10) Do Girls Have Many Positive Role Models? (25:16) Sara’s Brad V Logan Prediction (32:57) If Sara Could Only Keep 10 Exercises (37:10) How Exercise Can Help with Mental Health Difficulties (44:16) Dealing with Business as a Fitness Influencer (51:43) Is There a Temptation to Post Over-Sexualised Content? (1:03:14) What’s Next for Sara? Extra Stuff: Get my free reading list of 100 books to read before you die: https://chriswillx.com/books Try my productivity energy drink Neutonic: https://neutonic.com/modernwisdom Episodes You Might Enjoy: This Is How To Master Your Life - David Goggins - #577: ⁠⁠⁠lnkfi.re/SN-Goggins⁠⁠⁠ How To Destroy Your Negative Beliefs - Dr Jordan Peterson - #712: ⁠⁠⁠lnkfi.re/SN-Peterson⁠⁠⁠ The Secret Tools To Hack Your Brain - Dr Andrew Huberman - #700: ⁠⁠⁠lnkfi.re/SN-Huberman⁠⁠ - Get In Touch: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chriswillx Twitter: https://www.twitter.com/chriswillx YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/modernwisdompodcast Email: https://chriswillx.com/contact - Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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What Is It Like Trying To Date Gen Z Guys? - Sara Saffari - #679

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Talk to me about the Muscle Mommy movement. I'm hearing about it on the Internet that, guys, there's like a move away from Thinspo to Fitzpat to now Muscle Mommy, which is the step up. And even though you only just heard about that word today, it feels like you're part of that movement. Yeah.

People have been commenting, like, guys comment on my posts, like, Muslim Mommy sometimes. And like, I'm not gonna lie, I kind of like it. But today was the first time that I've heard, like, women addressing themselves as Muscle Mommy or each other as Muslim Mommy chimtracted in Muslim T shirts. Yes.

And I was at the event and I like, even, you know, girls talking on the intercom or whatever. They're like, okay, Muslims, let's keep pushing. I was like, I never heard this. Like, I haven't heard, like, women dressing women as Muslims.

I thought it was more of, like a, like, kind of joking, flirty type thing that guys comment on. Girls posts on Instagram taken the word and made it your own. So you're 23, 22. 22.

You probably growing up would have seen body types change from, I guess, when you were maybe 11, 12, 13 through to now, for sure. Talk to me about, like, that ideal female shape and kind of lessons that you talk about what an attractive woman is physically over time. For me growing up, at first I was really skinny, and then through high school, I would always influence weight. Like, I'd go anywhere from 130 pounds to 100 pounds, which is a pretty big difference when you already weigh, like, kind of low.

But I would always be told by my mom, like, confidence is what makes you, like, most attractive. Like, it's not what you look like, it's who you are and how you carry yourself. Sorry. And so that's what, you know, I was taught growing up.

But for me personally, if I ever saw a girl with abs, I loved it. I loved the look of it. I thought it was, like, so, I don't know, attractive to me. Like, that's what I was aiming for.

That's what I wanted, but I never knew how to get there. Like, I didn't know, like, oh, how does this girl get abs? I thought it was just all genetics. But no, diet comes into play.

Working out comes into play. So. And now there's this move. You remember when thigh gaps were a thing?

When everybody wanted the thigh gap, bro. Yes. I remember being at lunch in high school and, like, girls would look at each other and like, oh, you have it. Oh, you don't the most toxic thing ever.

And I remember, like, I didn't have one at the time or like I don't ever have one, but I would go home and beat myself about it because I. Girls would be pointing out how it's good to have a thigh gap. Interesting. Like in that kind of become very obsessed physically with the way the people appear.

Like both guys and girls. Guys are getting leg lengthening surgery. You've seen this. I know.

They get the. I'm pretty sure it's their shins extended. They break the shin, stretch it a bit, the bone regrows, they break it again and keep on going. The guys can add inches to the height.

My point being, people like optimizing for really weird, kind of not arbitrary, but they're optimising for that weird stuff. One of the things that nobody ever talks about is that sort of hotness or sex appeal that people have. Just from the way they hold themselves and from the way they act. I think that that has a huge amount of appeal to people, even if you don't want to admit it.

I think if someone's confident it can make them from a 6 to an 8, depending how they carry themselves. I think for sure it can. And obviously online dating and spending to time on Instagram negates a lot of that. You don't get to see that even in a pose, somebody can pose themselves in a sexy way and not have the confidence to be able to pull it off face to face and vice versa.

Yeah, for sure. So you have managed to gain quite a bit of drag in a very short space of time. I think the number one job or occupation that young kids in America say that they want when they grow up is influencer, a YouTuber. And in China it's astronaut or somebody cool, like something that's way less blame.

Yeah. Talk to me about this rapid gain in status. Because for guys, there's an obvious advantage, at least on the surface. More people know me, I have status, girls will like me.

But for a girl to gain millions of followers in basically no time at all. I know that seems interesting to me that there's probably more advantages that people wouldn't see and then some disadvantages wouldn't see as well. Yeah, I think for me, I'm not gonna lie, I think the money has been a great, great part of it. But for me, I'm not someone who spends my money on materialistic things.

I'll just tell you how I fake shoes on like they're 100 bucks. Yeah, they know. I think if they Know they've watched my content, they know that I don't like splurge, you know, I save all the money I make like sure to get when I get in. Now I can eat a little bit better.

Like I can order the fries, order the 4x4 instead of just like a single burger. But for me, like, the money's nice because now I know I have the power to, you know, if my mom needs a new car, I can be the one that does that for or like, you know, we're looking at to like moving out, maybe getting a new house. I know that I can pitch in and carry my weight financially and something like that. So I think just like not necessarily physically having the money, but having the peace of mind of knowing that I can support myself or my family.

And what's the increase in attention been like? You just came from this big gymshark event that we both had and you got swamped by men. You said at 90% of your audience is men. Yeah.

You're five foot three. Hey, five foot four. Give me a break. You're a small girl that's being surrounded by a shit ton of men.

Yeah. Like, talk to me, talk to me about this. This is in some regards like a nightmare scenario that girls literally would hate. And then in other regards, it's the price of being business.

For you. Yeah, for me, like today I realized how many people came up and was like, Sarah, like, you're really funny. I love your content. And I think that's the best compliment for me to get is being like, oh, you're funny.

Or you know, it's more than just like, oh, it's just like another hot girl on Instagram posting bikini pictures. Like if they find some kind of value for my content, even if it's just humor, like, sure, it might be anything educational, but if they, or laughing while watching my videos or watching me fuck with Bradley or you know, whatever it is, like that makes me happy because I know like after I watched like a Guinea Duncan video or Jitty on video, like I feel good. You know what, I was laughing through the 10 minute video. So what about the negative sides of the attention?

Have you had any? I've had some. I've had some. Like maybe the best not to say them to not just like very much attention to those things.

But I've had some, some weird or bad experiences with people, but for the most part it's all been good. I feel like regardless, whatever I involve myself with, even if I was, you know, using my degree and working a 9.5job. It wouldn't all be good. There would still be some bad, bad days.

There would be, you know, arguments with people I work with. There would be downfall, downfalls and other and other aspects of, you know, at an office from 8 to 5. So I'm definitely seeing a move online of like one of the dudes from UK made a video called the Gym Bro Culture 2.0 and he was talking about the move from the more like zyzz era exclusive body side stuff to a more holistic, integrated. It's life advice.

It's an older brother rather than a party friend type thing. I would be interested. I definitely think if you look at the fitness world for girls, it's still pretty trapped in the. It's all about your condition, your tan, the size of the bikini.

And I wonder, I don't know, like, if you have a personality as a girl who's also into fitness. Whether some people, and this is the same guys too, whether they almost feel like if I let the weirder side out of me that this is going to. I don't have many role models that do that. Or if I let the more intellectually curious side out of me that this isn't what people want on the Internet because all they want, I need to be leaner, I need to be bigger.

I can't show any personality. And it seems like it feels to me a little bit like the tide's shifting with that. Yeah, no, for sure. I think it is shifting.

I think that, you know, there's people on social media. I know there's one guy that works out at zooltrade. He does not have the traditional body type, like whatsoever, but he is the funniest person online. He is super caring.

Like, he'll always ask me like, hey, I want to do this bit. Like, would this be okay with you? Like, I want to respect, love you. Would this be okay with you?

Like, it's just he crosses like all, you know, checks all the boxes, make sure he does a good job. And he's so funny online. He's fully baby, but he's so funny. But in no ways would you look at him and think, oh, that's your typical, like influencer, bodybuilder.

Talk to me about this new trend of girls tiktoking guys looking over while they're doing videos. You spend a lot of time in the gym in the age bracket. You're big on TikTok. You're big on social media platforms.

Give me your Lay the land. What do you think about this? Trend, I think, I think sometimes guys looking at girls, depending on, you know, the age gap, I think the age gap does matter. I think, you know, if you're a 20 year old girl and there's a 25 year old guy just, you know, glancing over here and there, like without, like constantly staring, you know, might be his way of shooting a shot or whatever.

On the other hand, if he's 55 years old and like he's just continuously staring at you, that could be off. But then he also might be looking at you because your camera popped up and he's like, what is this girl doing? Like, I don't know what this is, you know, or you might want to try to not be in the frame. Why do you think this is happening?

Why do you think that this trend is occurring? Like, do you think these girls actually feel this way? Honestly? No, I don't think, I think that, like, you know, sometimes maybe they catch it in the moment and they think like, oh, this is what's gonna make me blow up.

Because I see myself as a very, like, I'm constantly aware of who's looking at me or my surroundings or whatever where, you know, if I'm walking around the pool and I see a guy look a little bit too much, I'm like, can I help you? You know, I'm constantly aware of that, but never have I been around other girls and I see them being that aware of things. Not usually. I feel like girls aren't usually that, that aware of it.

And I suppose when you're videoing yourself, you watching back and you go, oh, like, oh, external awareness almost. Yeah, yeah. So here's the thing that I thought when that main huge video went out and they both did it and then she did an apology and Joey Swoll, like found his new content arc. What happened there was people that spend a lot of time on the Internet use other stories from the Internet as a guide, a guardrail and a guideline for how they should behave as well.

Lots of girls looked at that situation and if you'd said to me, if you just showed me the video in isolation, I couldn't see the comments, I couldn't see the likes and said, what do you think is the response to this? It could have gone either way. I could have seen it as a coin toss that the Internet would have flamed the guy and said, that's too much, that's out of void and sided on the sort of victim, hypersensitive side. Or they could have gone away, that they did it go which is he looks over three times in 90 seconds, you're pointing your camera at him and you're shorter in your ass.

What do you expect? I meant to include bridge. Like, what'd you expect? Yeah.

So what happened? The way I saw it, this is kind of why it's so interesting. Lots of people that spend up on the Internet look at situations like that, kind of landmark opportunities for a common scenario to play out online. And they use the way that that fallout occurs as a barometer for how they should feel if it happens in LA and future.

Yeah, I think. And because the pushback was there, lots of girls now realize that, oh, if a guy looks up at her three times in 90 seconds while I'm doing blue bridge, maybe that's the sort of thing I don't need to be too concerned about. The problem is it could have gone the other way. And that now lowers the ceiling for guys to be scared, that if they look over too much, whether they mean to or whether they don't, they're going to be in trouble.

But the other one is it makes an increasingly fragile generation of young girls who feel victimized and concerned if a guy does work. I saw this video on TikTok and the whole Internet said that they need to, if this happens, that that's unspeakable. And I've heard about the dangers of Me too. I shouldn't walk alone.

This is too much. So you're almost outsourcing your anxiety level to the Internet. And it's purely by fortune and the way that the Internet responded that that didn't reset most gym girls expectations that that's something to be scared or offended by. Yeah.

But also coming from the other, you know, other side, I, I can see myself, like if a guy is squatting, I can see myself looking over, not because I'm trying to hit on him, but because I'm like, wow, his form is so good, or wow, he's breaking 90 degrees, or his knees are being pushed out very well. Or that's a lot of way, like, oh, how many reps is he gonna go for? I can, I totally do that in a non, like, sexual way whatsoever. How do you hit on guys at the gym?

Do you have to do it? Yeah, no, it's just all inbound for you and your culture. No, I'm not saying it's all inbound, but I'm saying that like, I don't think the gym is necessarily where I'd want to be approached. So I don't think I'd want to Approach someone in the gym?

Why wouldn't you want to be approached in the gym? It is the only two hours out of the 24 hours that I get. Why? What else are you doing for 22 hours?

Laying in bed, doing homework, eating. True. Sleeping like it's my, like two hours of Friday nights. People, like, go out with their homies, have their time.

That's every day for me from hours at 11 till 1 at the gym. What about when we finish your masters? What are we gonna do then? Maybe I'll get a PhD.

We'll talk to you about the other. Okay. So how much harder has dating been for you with all this attention? You can't go.

It's gonna be like if you go for dinner with somebody, if you go out on a date with somebody, the difficulty has increased exponentially. Now it's all of Snatcher. Yeah, yeah. It has made things harder for sure.

Especially if, like, you know, the person you're seeing or you're with doesn't do what you're doing. So they don't understand that. Sometimes, like for me, I don't drink, but going to an event, sometimes I have to go because I think like, oh, what about the business connections I can make from going to that event with people I can meet or whatever, not in a relationship intimate way, but in a business relationship type way. And I feel like sometimes it's hard for, you know, people that aren't doing this to be like, well, no, you don't have to go that, or you have to go to Vegas for this, or you don't have to go to Miami for that.

I'm like, well, no, I don't have to, but I feel like there would be connections there if I did go. Also, I suppose if someone's in the industry, they get injected into this level of surveillance scrutiny that you have that they didn't sign up for. Yeah. And now you're like, what's the open liner?

Or whatever. Oh, by the way, people might come up and ask you to take a photo of them with me. Yeah. Yeah.

That's interesting. Talk to me about guys your age. It's like this fucking moral panic on the Internet about Gen Z men especially. They're pathologically fapping their way through a monster energy fueled video game and porn binge.

Like, what are Gen Z guys like, the ones that you either grew up with or sometimes try and speak to with regards to dating or anything. How do you categorize them? How do you classify them? I feel like there's a lot of Growing to do from the age of 22 to 27 for men and I think, you know, 22 year old men just aren't there yet necessarily and I think that I am, I'm pretty mature for my age and I think the guys that I've counted for the most part just aren't there yet.

They're just immature, maybe caught up with kind of a younger mindset. Yeah. So what are they doing? Like what are they, what are they prioritizing?

What are they concerned about? I think they prioritize friends a good amount which isn't a bad thing. I'm just saying friends a lot, partying, going out, you know, drinking. I don't know how much.

That's an LA thing. I think a number of it might be an L thing. I think if you go to a rural town in Kansas maybe it's not as much. Yeah.

Have you heard of slow life strategy? Do you know about this? Slow life strategy? Yeah.

So there's a. It seems at the moment, based on the data that Gen Z, both guys and girls, a little bit younger than you, you would probably be at the very front of this wave getting a driver's license later, moving out home later, getting a job later, not parking as much or drinking as much and taking drugs. So they've got generalised risk aversion. They're not doing the risky things that previous generations of that age would but they're also not even really doing the adult things like the number of 16 to 20 year olds who don't have a driver's license is the highest ever.

Really? You think Covid has like a pushback in that? Maybe, maybe it could be that people just became more isolated, stopped. If that's your formative.

If you're 15 and Covid hits and you're 18 and Covid finishes, you've just grown up. All you can remember basically being the person you are is this hermit at home playing Fortnite or whatever. But what it makes me think about is what when these people do need to grow up. You mentioned young guys who do.

We may be growing up a little bit more quickly if you want a chance and it makes me wonder whether that's going to keep getting pushed further and further. Probably not, but I don't know. It's a. I think for me one of the biggest turn ons or pluses a guy can have is being motivated or like dedicated to something.

Even if that's plumbing, you know, just something that every day you want to do and work towards to being better at Whether that's the gym or a job like plumbing or being a dentist or being an astronaut, whatever. Just something to work towards rather than just kind of laying back and kicking your feet up and just enjoying day by day. I think that's great and everything. I think you have to have something that every day you're trying to improve.

Drive and motivation and ambition, I think are very sexy. And competence as well. If you can manage to hit the sweet spot with a partner of someone who you are attracted to but you admire as well. Holy.

Like you've got a partner that's a role model. That's an unbelievably potent cocktail, I think, for attraction. It's so strange to think about what that is for girls because, you know, guys can just go out and get their drive and do the things that typically are sort of masculine traits. It'd be very interesting what equivalent is for a girl.

You know, like, what is it that a guy would find in feminine traits that they want to absorb into themselves? You know what I mean? I don't know. One time I was on Brad's pod and I was like, oh, like I don't cook or clean.

And then everyone's like, I still don't live those common sense. I'm like, okay, I have been practicing now, but I will never live those common sense. I'm like, oh, like, why would you ever want her? She can't cook her clean.

Jesus Christ. Would you get maid? You don't need a wife, you need a maid. Yeah.

I was like, bro, I'm not gonna. I mean, I don't think I'd ever see myself doing someone else's laundry. Maybe on others, but my partners never. Well, you just think you don't put money in the campaign.

Yeah, I'm like, I'll pay someone to it. And I wasn't supposed to a house chef. I think part of that is that they associate a lack of willingness to do traditional household things with a non traditional relationship that is just not going to be as enjoyable. It's a less feminine sort of woman.

And the polarity between masculinity and femininity. The subtext is, I'm not doing the washing. You are. Right.

Which is. And guys are like, whoa, whoa, whoa. Exactly. You're not doing it.

I'm definitely not doing it. Yeah, right. So I do understand and I do think there's lots of talk about masculinity and stuff like that. What about the other side of the fence?

Are you seeing challenges that young girls have with femininity? At the moment, like finding their role within the world. Whether they should be a trad wife or like a sex positive sleep around girl, Hardy girl, whether she should be a hermit, I don't know. I think it's hard, especially with social media.

And like most of the girls you see on social media are like, you know, there's two sides of it, of course, but there's a lot of like, like sex symbols you see on social media or even if it's not like sex symbols, you see like these hot, beautiful girls that may or may not have had work done but in swimsuits or whatever. And for a lot of people it's hard to like, you would never get there. But like that's who you see on a daily basis on your phone. So that's, that's what you want or that's what you want to strive towards.

But yeah. So I think it's hard to say what kind of what like extent femininity girls look for, but I think social media hasn't made it easier. It's confusing. It's confusing for sure.

And look at some of the role models that were held up as. Okay, so this is really, really where, you know, this is someone that's charging forward and really getting it right. Lizzo fighting for girls all over the place and then the bottom falls out and it turns out that she's making the dances, eat bananas out of strippers of vaginas. Weight shaming all of the people as this champion for body positivity.

And Ellen DeGeneres as well, she's a total predict to work with. Yeah. And it's the people that you would think that were like the most understanding that turned out to not be. I don't know whether it's people that you would think.

I think it's people that portrayed themselves. Yeah, that's why it's correct. Yeah. People that portrayed themselves to be like the most understanding or accepting of everyone.

It's like the senator that's pushing the hardcore anti gay legislation that goes home and secretly watches gay porn on vpn. I think it's fascinating. There's a part of that, you know, the. Because people's actions are way less visible than the word online.

Like the thing that you tweet is way more important than the thing he did because no one sees the thing he did. They see the thing he tweeted. Yep. So when you look at the people that are the most forthcoming about being virtuous or morally grandstanding or I'm holier than thou when you see that.

That, to me, a lot of the time, signals there's probably something going on there unless I can really, really prove it. And I didn't see it with Lizzo. Not that I'm like, a Lizzo scholar. Yeah.

I didn't look at her and see. Yeah, this is someone who's really working hard to try and find the next, like, frontier for female body empowerment or something like that. It seemed like someone doing a rift. It seemed like someone that had managed to capture.

Capture a particular narrative and was just leaning into it. Yeah. Brad versus Logan. Who wins?

Yo, Brad's gonna flame me if I don't say Brad's gonna win in a street fight? No, in the ring. In the ring. In the boxing.

Okay. See me in order. That's the fight that I'm talking about. No, Brad's on a street fight.

Like, y' all on 2 60. Pull outside the gym. I'll rock your shit. Okay.

Who wins in the street fight? Brad. In the ring. Logan managed to pull that fence out of your arsenal.

Thank you. Don't kick me off. Rag your Bradley. I'm kidding.

But Brad is, like, obscenely strong, too. He's quick. He's stronger than Chris Bumstead. Right.

They had CBOT on the podcast, and Brad was like, yo, don't compare our numbers. It's not fair. We're talking about a world champion. I trained with Chris.

Chris is a guy's got big hands. Like, your hands are even more. Yeah. Um.

So, yeah, he is strong, but I don't know. I mean, Brad better get on that cardio game if he wants to try to do five or eight rounds. He's strong. He's also, like, a weirdly athletic.

Like, he can do, like, really high box jumps or, like. Like. I don't know. I just.

Do you think he does. Do you think he would actually go for a boxing fight? Yeah, with Logan. With Logan, probably, because now Logan's called him out.

Brad would look a wimp if he didn't. But Logan hasn't said that he'll do it personally. He said he had found someone for Brad to fight. Right.

I don't know. I didn't get into the specifics of it, but I know they had beef. They had, like, Twitter beef, which feels old school for people that are kind of Instagram and YouTube stars. It seems so high school a little bit, but I'd love to see that.

Yeah, I think it would be an insanely, like, good PR for both of them. They both bring clout to the table. Like. Yeah, Everybody loves them equally.

Like different camps love them equally as well, which is interesting. What's your. You went to the Jake Paul fight the other week. What do you make of this world of where Bryce just won a bare knuckle fight?

That was crazy. The first thing I ever. The first situation I've ever seen Bryce get into. I didn't mean he was doing bare knuckle.

And then he goes up against a guy who's been doing a good bit and wins. I think he technically won't do an injury. But he wins. Yeah, he won.

But he called it. Two brushes, I'm winning round two. And he won in round two. Flat play.

Would you do it? You want to start the ring, bare knuckles? No, just boxing. I'll do boxing.

High five, someone. Who do you want to fight? Who do you hate? Do you have any enemies?

There's not one I hate, per se. There's been people, I think, that have hated me. Who's your biggest beefing with? I haven't personally had beef.

Who's beef with you the most? Who's beefed with me? Yeah. I don't know if I can.

I don't know. I don't want to bring attention to her. She doesn't deserve it. Punch her in the face, bro.

I'm telling you right now. I would cut down to her weight and I'd beat the shit out of her. No, I'm kidding. But I think that I would definitely, I think, be dope to be like an influencer, boxing type thing.

Like people who haven't fought before, getting in the ring, same weight class, you know, both had three months, six months training leading up to the fight and then fighting each other. That'd be dope. Does that be very knuckle cycle boxing? It's so funny how the world of combat sports now has really been reshaped by it, right?

You've got Francis and Garnier and Tyson Fury fighting each other. You know, UFC legend up against the greatest living heavyweight fighter, potentially the greatest ever. And I don't think that that would have happened had KSI Logan Paulman happened and had Mayweather McGregor not happened. And if you track it all the way back to British guys forever, ever ago, like seven or eight years ago or something, they kicked it all off.

And now you've got who's dogging the next fight? Dylan danis. And then KSI's fighting some guy, I don't know. He's like big, big time.

I don't know. Point being, before it was we can't Believe that these influences are coming in and ruining the sweet science of boxing. Now, downstream, the purest boxing people are following a model. Fighting influencers.

Precisely correct. Right. So funny, because I think that at the end it's a win win for everyone because more, you know, the influencers bring a little bit. A different crowd, the younger crowd, they bring a little bit more PR to it, whatever it might be.

I think they bring a different audience to it that, you know, helps them out, sell tickets, gets pay per view, watches. It's entertainment as well. Yeah, entertainment. And you know, when people say this is getting like WWE and they're talking about baseball or they're talking about NFL or whatever, NBA.

I realized this the other week. What they mean is what happened was WWE essentially took the sport element of sport. And all that you had to do was reverse engineer the best way to create the rivalry. And then you don't need to worry about the outcome of the contest because we already know what's going to happen because we can write that.

So when people say this is becoming like wwe, what they mean is they found the model of how to create a rivalry, and this rivalry is starting to look like that. So really all it is is these people in NBA or whatever zeroing in on a really, really heated rivalry that compels people. I don't think it's fair necessary to say this is becoming like wwe. They split tested for, you know, decades and decades.

The best. Oh, we're going to have the heel. We're going to have like the redneck guy. We're going to have the clean cut heartthrob.

We're going to have the renegade artist. We have the Mexican dude that's got the hat, that face mask on. Yes, yes. Yeah, yeah.

So you just have this very effective way at garnering attention in a sport. And you don't need to worry about sport now. We're seeing it get across any scene drive to survive, which is formula one thing. Full swing, which is for golf.

Break point, that was the tennis quarterback. Now it's all about NFL. And people are interested in what's going on behind the scenes, which is exactly why you have to post 140 snapshot photos again every single day. People care about more than just like an Instagram picture here or there.

They care about what you're doing. Yeah. I've asked this question to a bunch of different people. If you only had 10 exercises for the rest of your life to hold onto as much muscle, go as much muscle as you could, which ones would you choose?

And why 10 exercises? 10 exercises. Me, anything you want. But you've only got 10.

Okay, let's start off Leg press. Okay. For, you know, you can do different variations and you can hit like different parts depending on how you put your legs. Rdls, barbell, dumbbells.

Single leg barbell. Rdls. Barbell rdls. Hardcore.

Okay, cool. Yeah. Okay. Military press with the barbell.

Military press. No standing, so you can raise your core. I'm only getting exercises here. Okay, right, yeah.

So you've made an exercise out of shoulder exercises. Good inclined dumbbells. Every single person has said incline. Dumbbell press.

Just press. Yeah, yeah. Phenomenal. Yeah, yeah.

Can't go wrong. Yep. That's four, right? Gosh.

Okay, what is it? Decline or incline? I always confuse myself. When you lean back a little bit and you do the curls.

I think that's technically inclined. I know exactly what you mean. Yes. Because I always mess it.

I know what you mean. Those curls with dumbbells. Supinate. So like from neutral to supinate or do you keep it?

Because some people keep it locked out like that and keep it locked out like that. Yeah, yeah. So it's almost like a, I think it's called like a Y coal area here. It doesn't suck so hard and you're still weak on the, you know, the bottom of the movement and it's.

You flushes up the bottom five kilos and it starts swimming. Okay, so we've got leg press, rdls with a barbell, military press, standing incline, chest press with dumbbells. That last one you just. Halfway through.

Halfway through. Legs are okay. Chest's okay. Shoulders are okay.

Biceps, Right. A weighted pull ups for back. Okay. I think maybe one of the only background exercises I need.

Overhand, underhand, neutral. I'm not a pussy. Come on over again. Okay, Chris.

Bumps. That's a neutral. Oh, fuck. I mean neutral.

Right? Let's fix it. Okay. Gosh, this is hard.

Hammer curls to hit the other head of the bicep. Standing hammer curls. Uh huh. It's a lot of biceps now with the pull ups with the two sets of curls.

Okay, yeah, we're gonna do the biceps now. I think I have to do lateral. Lateral raises for shoulders. Yep.

Oh my God. I didn't hit any triceps. Do I have one more? Skull crushers.

Yeah. Tell you what I forgot that I did five years ago and then rediscovered the other day. Lying skull crushers. So going to the floor and taking it from the floor as opposed to going from a bench, because you can Go from a dead stop.

And it means if you need to fail, you can always. You're never scared of literally smashing yourself in the face, falling off the back of the bench. And it feels really convenient. Sometimes you bring your feet up on a bench and you feel like you wobbly a little bit.

Yeah. Um, yeah. Okay. Skull crushes.

So you've got one left from all of that. And then I think I'm gonna have you hanging leg raises. Yeah, that's the most popular abs exercises as well. Ryan Terry, Chris Bumstead, both of them.

So one of those weird things everyone trains, everyone's kind of got confused around training abs and all the people that cook in midsections. Yeah, everyone always asks me, what's your like, ab workout? And I'm like, maybe once a week I'll even hit decline sit ups, you know, with a weight with 10 pounds. Or I'll do hanging leg raises.

But most of it is just like you embracing my core and any other workout I do vacuums or just what you eat. Well, you, I think you came into training pretty underfed, right? You were crazy, crazy talk through that, like where you were at body wise. And then sort of your progression of training in the gym.

Yeah, so I was going through a hard time. I was like the lowest I'd ever weighed. I was £100. And I was very insecure with myself.

I would always wear baggy clothes because I hated how like I felt like I just looked sick. Like that's how skinny I was. I remember my meals. Would like a McDonald's little burger, like off the dollar menu, and large Coke would be my meal for the day.

That's all I would eat. I remember at 7pm usually I get up and go get that and drive around the town for an hour and go back home. Like my mental health just was so poop. It was crappy.

And I think that went on for about six months. And then I was. It was just like a switch. I was tired of spending literally every hour in bed and like just moping around.

Low energy, low confidence. And then I was like, you know what? I got nothing better to do. Might as well hit the gym.

Was there a moment? Was it? Or was it just a progression of a time of becoming increasingly fed up with that. I don't think there was a moment per se, but I think I just got tired of feeling so shitty.

Like I was tired of feeling tired and. And like I was just so unhappy with myself. How old are you? I was 20.

Yeah, about two years ago. 20. And then I remember. I literally remember, like, what I was wearing that day.

And I remember the drive to the gym to sign up for the gym membership. I remember I wore glasses. I didn't think, like, I was like, the membership today. I'll start tomorrow, or whatever.

I went in, I got the membership, and then I started that same day. I wore my glasses to work out, whatever. I just. Weird.

But I remember it. And then I worked out, and then I went home, and I was like. Well, I had seen tiktoks. Like, right after you work out, you have to eat something, like, high protein.

Like, I'm gonna eat, like, half a piece of salmon. And I was like, anything is better than, like, McDonald's burger at this point. So I remember I was like. I would learn a little bit on TikTok.

I'd learn a lot from my brother. I'd learn, like, people that just work out. I would talk to them, try to pick their brain about, like, how I can improve, like, everything all at once in my nutrition, my workouts, everything. So it was just like a mix of TikTok talking to people that helped me kind of get to where I am.

And within, like, maybe six, seven weeks of working out, I think I really had it dialed. So I picked it up very fast, relatively, you know, train trained with intensity from the beginning, but push myself. I remember it was when I started, like, you just wear face masks at the gym sometimes. I would have, like, oh, shit.

Yeah. So this was during COVID Yeah, it was 2020 when I started. It was May of 2020. In the midst of it.

Yeah. Wait, May of 2020 or 2021? Maybe 2021. I think it was 2021.

Yeah, it was 2021. Yes. Yeah. What was most difficult?

What advice would you give to girls that are happy with your guys who are unhappy with their bodies? Like, no, there's a lot of challenges in overcoming. There's a lot of. Even if you did get some advice from TikTok, most of it is horseshit.

Regardless of who you are, I think you need to implement some type of physical activity for an hour and a half a day. You know, 45 minutes to an hour and a half, depending on the level of intensity. But whoever you are, however old you are, you know, if that means going outside and walking, you know, um, for me, it's like, the gym is something that. It's not a chore.

It's not at the point that it's the two hours of the day that I enjoy. Like I was telling you earlier, like, I Look forward to like going to the gym. Regardless of your age, you need to work out, do some kind of physical activity, train with intensity, whatever. Train on your own.

Yeah. Because obviously a lot of the content that you put online, there's Brad, you guys will be around or there's a videographer, right? Yes, right. I prefer training on my own.

There was a point when I first started, I'd be like, there's no way in hell I'm going to the gym by myself. Like, this is peak embarrassment. I need someone there, which is totally fine. Like do that.

Go with a, go with a friend or go with a brother, sister, parent or whoever. But I'm at the point now where I like training alone. You know, I. It's like my alone time, I don't know, I enjoy on my own.

Then when I do film or whatever, it's like usually my rest day and I'll go and I'll film at Zoo. A YouTube video. Okay. Because if you filmed on a training day, you'd have to sacrifice training to get content, right?

Yeah. So I just go on training is depression. Exactly. Right.

What do you get outside of that? Outside of working out? I sleep about 10 hours a night. Is that strategic or do you just.

Strategic muscle rose in your sleep? Okay, yeah, but 10 hours is like, it's pretty intense. Yeah, but I don't know how many 22 year old million plus influencers are saying, I know, sleep 10 hours a night and then train for two hours a day. Sleep matters, guys.

Sleep matters. Okay, okay. Eight to ten. It's not always ten, but it's usually when you join the whoop team, I'll know and you can't lie to me anymore.

Okay, perfect. No, it's always, always. At least eight. Never, never less.

Okay. I do still go to school. I have eight weeks left, so I do that in my free time. I.

I'm not gonna lie to you. I'm on my phone probably eight to ten hours a day. What do you do? I'm mindlessly scrolling and I try to trick myself thinking like, I respond to emails.

I respond emails like, beautiful work too. Yeah, it's work too. But I also convince myself that if I keep scrolling, something will inspire me. Do you track screen time on that?

You're in the settings. I want to see. God, this is going to be embarrassing. I want to see the app breakdown of what's happening here.

It's actually down from last week, so let's not be too judgmental. Daily average is seven hours and six minutes. You peaked with, oh, Sunday's a big day. Sundays maybe 12 hours.

See all activity. Okay, so messages 13 hours. Instagram 10 hours. Snapchat 8 hours.

TikTok 4 hours. Safari mail. YouTube messages. Who are you doing messages?

Group chats. No, I mean maybe talking to fucking shitty business people. Not all shitty people. Some shitty.

Yes, many shitty businesses. Many shitty business people. That's why I was so dumb when I first started thinking like anyone had my best interest at heart. Like this one genuinely helped.

Why? I don't know. I feel like a lot of people try to scam. Not scam, but finesse.

Finesse, yeah, such a good word. I wonder how much of it is the way you present as well. It's like a relatively friendly girly goal and someone sees this opportunity to try and outwit a 21, 22 year old who probably doesn't have really any idea what's going on. And I wonder whether the equivalent thing would happen with a dude.

It doesn't. I feel like in social media fitness space, I feel like from what I've heard and everything, maybe men get, you know, respected a little bit more. I think they probably get, it's harder to break through and get paid because the way that you can monetize good looking girls, especially in fitness space, to monetize guys and girls, good looking guys, really unsized guys. Yes.

But then I feel like you're right in the monetization aspect. Also in the brand partnership aspect, I think guys are treated a little bit better in terms of packaging, in terms of money. Yeah, yeah, that's interesting. I think there's more respected even personally I haven't had an experience with brands I work with.

I'm saying I've heard my friends like, you know, due to their engagement or whatever, she like she should be getting paid more. And then I know a guy is below her on engagement, following everything and he's getting paid more than she is. And I'm like, well this is just. She's getting finessed.

Yeah, it's an interesting one. I mean I read this stat the other day that said by 2030 women are going to control 50% of global capital. So women are already 80% of consumer purchases. I think that's skewed a lot because if mothers are having to do the shop, yeah, of course every mother is going to be one in charge of shopping for baby stuff and then plus they're going to get groceries inside.

It does kind of skew that number. But increasingly I think women are going to have the spending power which means that the way that marketing stuff is going to have to, it's going to have to be adapted. It's definitely going to have to be adapted. And I think we're already seeing it.

I think brands like Bud Light, Miller Lite tried to do something that seems more pro female. But remember what we were saying before, like we can call it the Lizzo effect of doing something that looks ostensibly the window shopping is we care behind the scenes. I don't think anybody really thought that Buddy cared about Dylan Mulvaney or they cared about the fact that he used to do a mud wrestling ad. I think they saw it as, I mean the dynam of anything.

Oh, fuck it, I'll say it. A lot of people had a problem with the dynam of anything because it was Bud Light finally showing the like woke cucked blue pill bona fides that they'd been hiding from everybody all along. But the group of people who largely were saying that are also a group of people that will say things like don't cancel Jon Peterson because of one bad thing. He said, yeah, so don't judge some of my favorite content creators based on one out of context small sample.

But then they're flipping it and judging it's a brand that's been around for decades and does this one thing. And maybe, maybe they're right and I'm open to them being right. Yeah, that. But like secretly did hate all every straight person on the planet, they hated them for decades and they were just waiting for the opportunity or a small gifting to a poorly chosen influencer who's not super popular amongst a very, very large cohort of the country was going to cancel their face on them.

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Frequently Asked Questions

How long is this episode of Modern Wisdom?

This episode is 1 hour and 4 minutes long.

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This episode was published on September 11, 2023.

What is this episode about?

Sara Saffari is a fitness model, influencer, athlete and a YouTuber. Many young people dream of being young, fit, and famous. Lots of us are seduced by the idea of the attention this brings, but what's the reality of being so exposed in a world...

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