This is optimal living daily episodes 784, an excerpt from the book, The Kindest Cure by Tara Kuzno, and I'm just a molecular personal narrator, reading blogs to you, mostly, but sometimes books, like today. That just came out today, actually, I'm reading an entire chapter for you, and I'll share more about the author at the end, so let's get right to it, as we optimize your life. An excerpt from the book, The Kindest Cure by Tara Kuzno. Chapter 2, Your Kindest Instinct The world can, at times, feel like a very unkind place.
The year my daughter Josie was 12 years old, three horrendous events occurred, the Batman shooting in a movie theater where 12 people were killed and 70 wounded, the massacre at Sandy Hook Elementary School that left 26 children, teachers, and staff dead, and the Boston Marathon bombing that wounded hundreds of people and killed three. It was a year of extreme tragedy. Despite my efforts to minimize overexposure, Josie felt a real and strong fear that these things could happen to her. Lockdown drills were being done regularly at school, and she began imagining herself and her loved ones torn to bits.
Josie's heartbreaking response was to wonder aloud, why do people do this? A basic dread took hold of her. Then something sparked an awakening. In a long jump sand pit, some kids discovered a pair of baby field mice.
Josie became determined to rescue them, even though everyone knew it was a lost cause and coldly said as much. She declared, I know they'll die, at least I can give them comfort until they do. At her insistence, I drove Josie to the sports field that she clutched a bottle of Pediolite in a dropper. She dashed across the track to be Nurse Nightingale.
The mice were still alive and she gently placed the pink creatures in a box of tissue. As I watched, it hit me. Josie was fully alive with her compassion for all living things. It was the act of caring itself that mattered to her.
As if by demonstrating the kindest way that she could possibly act, she could turn the world around. She gave them names as children do, Bradley and Charlotte, and carefully nursed them. One mouse died a few days later. Josie held out hope for the other, but in the end she buried the pair in the garden.
While she was frustrated that they hadn't lived, she consoled herself with this. At least I tried. We were all moved by our efforts. At a time when the world felt burdened by grave issues, saddled with grief, frustration, and helplessness, Josie found healing and empowerment by demonstrating her own kindness.
She showed a brutal world that she would care for the meekess of his creatures, and in doing so, she discovered that what feels best is not evading harsh realities is being kind along the way. Being a kindness warrior. True kindness does not have an agenda or ulterior motive, it is as Josie showed, an instinctual response that can feel highly energized and even fierce. Yes, kindness can be fierce.
Shogem Trunkba, Tibetan Buddhist teacher, goes so far as to say that a compassionate mind is a warrior's mind. To understand our self-nature, as well as a self-nature of humanity, we should focus on what has beauty and dignity among humankind. Doing so will rid you of a fearful mind and change it into a spiritual warrior's mind. To overcome your fears of living in a world where painful things happen, expand your compassionate nature, because it is innate within you.
Know that what you do matters to others, so be caring and careful about your actions. Be a kindness warrior, encourage the pure energy behind this instinct. Honestly, our family saw Josie's efforts as completely pointless, we wanted to protect her from inevitable disappointment. We were buzzkill, as she said, and we were indeed killing kindness.
The truth is that joy and suffering go hand in hand, and it's a disservice to shield children and each other from either. Super-caregiving species. Our biological instinct for kindness comes together with our social conditioning to inform how we engage in the world. You have a deep instinct to care, we all do.
Humans have evolved not just to survive, but to thrive. There's a lesser-known aspect of the theory of human evolution, sympathy. Stronger than self-interest or self-protection, sympathy is a reflexive social instinct. It developed from our need to care for vulnerable babies who require years of nurturing.
This made us a super-caregiving species which, from one generation to the next, rewired and refined our nervous systems. Compassion and kindness are so much a part of the human blueprint that they are embedded into the folds of our brains as a researcher and academic Dr. Keltner puts it. Human spiritual leaders agree that these distinctly human qualities are built into our cellular blueprints and woven into our spirits.
We are wired to care. How this natural propensity for kindness flourishes is largely up to you. The psychologist and neuroscientist Richard Davidson said, quote, human beings come into the world with innate basic goodness. When we engage in practices that are designed to cultivate kindness and compassion, we're not actually creating something de novo, we're not actually creating something that didn't already exist.
What we're doing is recognizing, strengthening, and nurturing a quality that was there from the outset, unquote, and therein lies the hope and responsibility. How you express this exceptional capacity depends on your unique life experiences because the reality is that aggression and competition are part of our evolutionary legacy, too, so is fear. Fortunately, your hard wiring can be trained through efforts to nurture and strengthen your kinder instincts. You can grow in kindness.
It begins with an awareness of your kind nature and it culminates in the determination to honor that nature in the purpose you elaborate for yourself and the effort you engage in. Kindness in practice. Rekindling kindness. I invite you to become a kindness warrior.
The process begins by simply thinking about what kindness means to you. Remember your own thoughts, feelings, images, and aspirations. Take out a journal and complete this reflection exercise. Call to mind at least three instances when you experienced kindness.
These could be moments when your kindness instinct caused you to override hesitation and show care or concern for the well-being of others. They could include times when you were on the receiving end of kindness or when you witnessed someone else putting love into action. You could include stories of kindness that you heard about that have stuck with you. Here are some problems to help get you started.
I remember when I helped, I was reminded about human kindness when, I'll never forget when blank was kind to me. When I think about kind people in the world, the list includes, when I think about kind people in my life, I call to mind. A time I stood up for kindness was when I think about when I had to get out of my comfort zone to be kind, I remember the time. By noticing your instinct toward kindness and compassion, you can begin to kindle it or rekindle it.
It could be like a campfire. You start with the smallest of sticks and blow gently on the flames. Then the logs catch in an outpouring of warmth and light. So recognize kindness when you see it.
Notice that, like Josie, many of us are warriors without even knowing it. Reflection. This is my natural state. I ask myself, what has life taught me about kindness?
In what ways am I a kindness warrior? You just listen to an excerpt from the book, The Kindness Cure by Tara Kuzno. I'm constantly thinking about how to optimize my health, what supplements to take, hours of sleep, what my diet should focus on. Superpower finally takes the guessing out of it.
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So, Tara, the author of this book, which just came out today, by the way, she's a clinical psychologist, meditation teacher, well-being researcher, and social entrepreneur. Definitely check her out. You can find her at tarakusano.com. I have it linked in this episode's description.
And you can find her book there and on Amazon. And that should do it for today. I hope you're having a great day. And I'll be back tomorrow reading to you back to blogs where your optimal life awaits.