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Learn more by visiting ACAST.com slash advertise. Hold on. Hello. I'm your new man in the cans.
4 track, man. For the third year. 3 years of bombing, you and the Dow. What the fuck?
Well, I'm pleased it's punch, which should be back. And that's how many seasons. And guess who? As a holiday sale coming up?
I dare, of course. Who's running all over the place? He's home for the day. If he's grirracing your soul, his presence is his damaged presence.
Hopefully it's just in those ear can houses. Hopefully it's not permanent. Even good on Chadoop. Mm.
Who is that? Who is that? A jiggle. A jiggle.
A jiggle. Hearing, damning. It's all here for you today, right now. Raw impressions 101.
Raw 101 sounds like my class. It's not Raw 101. Raw 101. For you all episode 101.
Take it away, you two. I'm the man out of the guy. Hello. Hi.
Just stopping by. Ah. On my way to L.A. Just breathing through.
You're so busy. Nice place you got here. Yeah, you like it. I do.
I do. Adele. Oh, hi, Lu. Hi.
Oh my gosh, you are not home for long enough. It's just not long enough for me. One day, guys. He's home for one day.
It's never long enough. Ah. Such a tease. Such a tease.
Home and then back out again before I wake up in the morning or right as I'm waking up to my morning. You know, I'm never on tour and like, wow, I'm really glad that I'm getting this time away. I don't feel that way. Yeah.
I can't say that that's always been the case in my life. I used to like going to where I'm like, well, it's cool. I get a little break. Get a little alone time.
I don't feel that way. Um, with you and our life. Oh, God. That was the truth.
That was the frog of truth. Did you hear that? Everybody. Just with my little truth frog.
You're through. Just did a little. Oh, man. There's a lot going on in my body.
There's a lot happening, everyone. So yeah, he's just breathing on through for a brief stay. And of course, look at the dedication, guys. We were right back in the raw 101 studio.
We missed you all so much. I missed doing the pod last week. It was just not possible. It was just not possible.
It was not possible. I was on tour with the full conclusion. Yeah. It was not the kind of tour where he had a lot of sitting around time.
And I also shared a room with John Davis for about half of it. Yeah. And then when I got my own room, I realized I didn't have the right adapter from a microphone. I don't know if I made it clear in this podcast, but adapters drive me fucking crazy, the right adapter.
There's... That's your thing. Oh my God, it makes me so nuts. That's your one thing.
Oh, it's not my one thing. Oh, I need my one thing. It is December. It's a thing.
Yay. Ching, ching, ching, ching. So when I'm going to Los Angeles, you are... I am kind of like wishing I had octopus arms this week, because there's so much I'm doing.
Next weekend is, I guess, my second annual official holiday pop-up sale at our house. I do it two days on the weekend, and I set up the first floor of our home, kind of like a mini craft fair with different stations and booths. And we open up our home for two days where other artists, friends of mine come together and we sell our goods, like very small business style. And folks, comments very festive.
I whip out the five disc CD changer and I put in our CDs, our Christmas and holiday music. I put them on shuffle. Don't forget the Phil Specter album. The Phil Specter Christmas LP.
Yeah. The Greatest Christmas Record. There really is. All that in my opinion.
I know. That one is. Well, I'm going to have to do that amongst all the other things. Look for my holiday and Christmas CDs, and then clean the house, finish preparing all of my knitwear for sale, figuring out how I'm setting everything up, making sure there's stations that are available for the people I'm sharing the space with, which is my friend Alexis is going to have her beautiful potter.
One of Izzy's teachers, Sarah, is actually going to be here selling her homemade sourdough bread. He's like about the baked goods aspect. Yeah, having freshly baked bread. That's the first on this time.
That's the first time. I believe our friend Liz is working on making hand poured beeswax candles. She's doing that. And Kaya, Lendy, Anna, they're all going to have quilting embroidery.
Lendy's going to have her hand drawn calendars. Anyway, it's going to be a whole to-do. And her hand drawn calendar? Yeah, she did a beautiful calendar.
I'm like, I might poach that idea. Yeah, actually that is a good idea. It is. Thank you, Lendy.
I can make a calendar with like, you know, important dates and my musical history. Oh my god, that would be so cute. You could even have the release date on each calendar of one each album has come out. Like, in four, Tenactan's blasts will detail the disturbing new development in his left ear.
It's a Tenactan to anus. Here come the Tenactan to anus blasts. This is from episode 63. I remember when I...
Did that... It was actually in the episode? It was. One of our faithful listeners mentions to me.
Yes. It's us on our sub-stack. Yeah. It talks about sizzling on my actual asshole.
Oh my god, that's truly your butt. Yeah. Wow. Raw 101.
So I'm in this is... I've got this thing going on with my ear. Not your ass right now. No, my ass is great.
Great. My ass has been really good for a long time. That's wonderful, dear. Okay, though.
Okay, this is a recording that I made. I came home from one of the home. I came back to my hotel room after full-complagion. I noticed that I was hearing a tone in my left ear when I was whistling to myself.
And I made this recording. And you hear one note, right? Yeah. Okay.
I hear. Is it the same one? Just echoed or is it like a different... It's like a slightly different pitch.
I found out because I recorded myself and then I played it back and I'm like, oh my god. It's only one note. That's eerie. It was really eerie.
And this is approximately what it sounded like to me. In my ear. This is making me anxious. So I heard this ghost note there.
That's why I'm hearing it. So it's kind of like a floating additional. Yeah, I'm hearing my left ear. We are very concerned about your ear.
Truth be told. Yeah, it might be flying while congested. Or it's permanent hearing damage. Or a tumor, of course.
Or both. And I... And this is the sound that's also in my left ear. This is what it started with.
And South America. It started with this hum in my left ear. This is approximately the note that I hear in my left ear. That's the bass.
So this is really what I hear in my left ear. When I whistle to myself, these particular notes actually, it's not all notes, thankfully. It's not like a... Is it still going?
Yeah. It's still going in my head. So that's what's going on in my left ear, everybody. Yay!
I'm sorry. Yeah. I wanted to demonstrate that. Is that okay?
That's okay. Yeah, I'm really anxious about it. And I'm only home for a day, so I can't really get it checked out. I went to an ER in England.
Yeah. And I sat there for about three hours. It was a... In between Leeds and Manchester.
I went to an ER in the middle of the night. And they said I didn't have an infection, which was good. Although, I would have preferred to have an infection and then be prescribed something that would have made it go away by now. Yeah.
So I had to do the inevitable, you know, especially when the notes started coming in, the extra note that I was hearing. And then I noticed while I was listening to music, that I was hearing... We had this wonderful... This person opened for us in Bristol.
Under the name TLK, and they were amazing. And I was hearing these wild decays with the piano notes. And I thought, wow, this is really psychedelic. And I even mentioned to them, afterwards, like I love the way your piano was wavering and decaying.
Not understanding that that's... I was only hearing that. That I was hearing these sort of ghosts. I just thought it sounded incredible.
And... And we were... To Nactim, to Anis Blasts. Lou plays an example of what music sounds like in his left ear.
And then Jojo, our driver, per manager, was playing the Cock-To-Twins. And this is what it sounds like, or sounded like in my left ear. And I thought I was going to have an anxiety attack. Just this strange, broken sound.
So... It was even this song. It was really... You know, I'm really hoping that it's just like, you know, pressure on my ear canal from flying while congested.
You know, it seems likely because it developed when I was in South America. Okay. I've had like the most... I've had a pretty interesting and intense few weeks of travel.
Yes. Because in South America, we flew every day, more or less, every other day. Or, you know, and it was a long flight to get down there. And I was really congested.
Yeah, you were under the weather. I was under the weather the whole time. But I did do a lot of just lying down and sleeping, and then I would have a lot of energy for the show. So I was very...
I think I've really figured out a really good way to be really... You know, a lot of times, like, it would be very difficult to fly somewhere and then negotiate jet lag. And then also lack of sleep, because I don't sleep that well in planes. And I didn't sleep pretty much in South America.
But I did sleep. I took a prezzolam to sleep. Like, and that was okay. I thought I was going to be okay, but then the...
And then the sound developed. Quick question. When was the last time a display ad changed your mind? Now think about the last time a friend told you about something they loved.
Different feeling, right? That's how podcast advertising works. A host who's built a real trust with their audience talks about your brand and their own words and their own voice. It doesn't interrupt the experience.
It's part of it. With Acast, you can access the world's largest podcast marketplace. Choose the right shows, the right audiences, the right format. Then watch the data tell you it worked.
You're not buying impressions. You're buying influence. Learn more by visiting acast.com slash advertise. So I think I'm, you know, I'm concerned about the sound and I'm also concerned about the anxiousness it gives you.
You know, and I was reading about people who have... What's that? That's a car outside. I was like, did you hear that?
There was another sound. What was that? I didn't know if you had like an airplane or something set up again. I know.
I created this. I've created this. There's a soundscape. I don't know when things are coming in now.
I've created this very anxious bed for this episode. I know. Sorry, we got to... Oh.
Hey, hey, hey, and I think that... Breathe. You are displaying a lot of anxiety about it, which is totally understandable. I just want to say though that it's...
You're not alone in it. Like when you are experiencing it, I obviously am not experiencing what you're experiencing, but I'm experiencing my own version of it as your loved one, you know, because I'm not just like, oh, that sucks for you and carry on. When your body and your face and your mannerisms kind of contort into the anxious state, I feel it physically and it's very stressful. And then so I'm worried.
I want you to be okay. And anyway, what I was reading about this, people who have like ear situations, tinnitus or mirrors or what you have. What I have could be, could be, duplicousus. Right.
It really fits... I, you know, I look online, which is always... It's always, it's sketchy when you feel... When you do your own diagnosis.
Kind of. Although I feel like half the time when I go to the doctor now, they're like, well, you can read about this online. I'm like, okay. So what I have really not just duplicuses.
Yeah. And then it's like... Could you describe what that is really quickly? Well, it's hearing two notes in a mirror, like one of your readers.
And I read this fascinating little blog that classical musicians discussing it. And they can actually pinpoint exactly where the notes, what note off it is, what step... You know, they can identify the second note that they're hearing, the sort of ghost note, which was pretty fascinating. But the one account that I did read, it resolved itself.
But I think the thing that scares me the most is, is that it might affect my singing. Like it can make me sing flat or sharp. And that actually causes, that kind of causes the anxiety because I say like, oh, this is what will ruin me. This is what will ruin my ability to sing.
This is what will ruin my ability to play. I can make it through most of a day with this condition, where I can kind of like, you know, I can talk myself through it. Like this is a temporary, it may last for a while, but I've had really intense, strange, tinnitus in my right ear that I had for a very long time, that was seen to be seasonal, and it ended up going away. And this one I'm thinking, but the problem with this one is it's really loud.
The humming is extremely loud. There's no physical component to this. There's no dizziness. Thank goodness.
Okay, that's good. Because it's not an infection, and that's one thing I wanted to rule out. And I also read that when yours also has dizziness, I think it kind of seems to have similarities to vertigo, perhaps like. And then you mentioned that your parents knew had sort of understood what this had the same.
My dad, I described it to him like what you've been telling me, and he was like, oh, that's like exactly what your mom and I have had for years, the last like 10 years or so before we had our before we got hearing aids. It was becoming so loud in their ears. And when I hear hearing aid, that actually makes me panic too. And I'm like, I don't want the hearing.
I don't want to be the first member of dinosaur junior with the hearing aid. Okay, so could I finish my thought, which was going all the way back to what I was saying, that what I was reading about all these different things, one of the main worries or things that they want people to work on is the stress and depression or anxiety that comes with these different diagnosises, because they can actually lead people to some pretty severe depressions, I guess. And so that was my worry. And it was saying that they recommend meditation like as a part of the diagnosis or treatment, treatment, sorry, because there does have to be some level of like also acceptance perhaps of like trying to find a way to live with these things or to find moments.
I've been doing that. I've gotten really good at calming myself down with breathing, you know, sure I've talked about it. I have been worried about your anxiety level, though I think this has been very stressful. I mean, it's the thing when you have something like this, I don't want to like, when I was younger, when I did feel anxiety, I wanted to sort of like share it, you know what I mean?
Or I'd just really talk about it and share it and almost bring someone else into my world of anxiety, but I don't want to do that with you. You know, and it's actually strengthened me quite a bit. Like our relationship, I've really dropped that trait, because I would call it a trait in the past. You know, I was younger in my 20s and 30s and 40s, where I would really radiate that anxiety.
And I would say something like, this is over, you know, pertaining to almost anything really that was causing anxiety and really speak with these DEF CON 5, you know, end of the world. And that's something that I don't do as much with you. Disaster thinking. Disaster thinking.
I don't want to share my disaster. You know, I don't want to go there because it generally doesn't happen. You know, what the reality is always, you know, so much, it's not that. It's not your disaster.
You know, and my, so, you know, over the last, when we, for the time that we've been together 12 years, I've just really ramped that down. And yesterday I had that kind of unfortunate moment where I was like, this is it, you know, you're texting me some pretty extreme stuff. And I felt so bad. I was like, I don't, I don't want to do that because I mean, I don't think, you know, it's not the end of the world.
And if I do, if I do have to get a hearing aid, I'll get a hearing aid. Although I can say that I'm not losing, I can hear in my left ear, but what's really, and then I think if it is permanent, when I'm, I mean, I will as a human animal adjust to it, you know, as animals adjust to things that seem intolerable at first, you know, like a, you know, cat losing its leg or, and, and, you know, things that we adjust, you know, so I'll, I'll adjust. Right. You know, and I'm not a depressive person, you know, regardless of when anyone thinks based on my songs.
True. You're really not. I'm not. It's true.
I'm a little fucking ray of sunshine when I wake up. But I can be, you know, I can be positive. I mean, I would say you're not a depressed person. That's not what I would characterize you as.
And, you know, I think that you are. Yeah, I'm here to help depressed people. I'm here to help you. You're introspective.
And I think that's where a lot of your songwriting comes from, is you're very introspective. And so you are always like thinking deeply about things and, you know, but I, but, yeah, people have confused that I think with thinking that maybe you're very sad or you write to that song or you're depressed, but you're really not actually, you're pretty, pretty light. You have anxiety, which is different than depression, I feel like, and it comes and goes, you know, and I've, I have done a lot, I did a lot of meditation on this trip with the full conclusion in order to calm myself down while experiencing this, this condition. Yeah.
And so I did do that, but there was always be like sometime in the day where it was just too much. And it was like listening to the Cockdoin's and hearing that sound, you know, and I was just freaking out by him. And then, and then, you know, thinking about like maybe I sang off key and on the full completion shows, which is like, and I watched a little bit of a live clip that JoJo, our tour manager, had made, and I sounded okay, but I did sing a couple of things off and I'm like, I don't remember singing those off. Although I did drink a beer during the course of that performance.
I don't like to drink during performances anymore because of moments like that. I don't really, because I mean that betrays any kind of chemical that you might have had, like a performance if you don't, I mean, even the smallest amount of alcohol or marijuana or whatever can throw off my pitch or my concentration because the concentration will waver. Yeah. If it wavers even slightly, then I can, then I will lose that pitch.
If my mind takes over, my sort of slightly altered mind takes over, I'll lose it out here and I don't like to do that. Mm-hmm. You know, I don't like to do that. Well, we're going to be working on getting Lucy and everyone.
So now that we've just talked to your ears off about Lucy, you're, rest assured, we're not just sitting around, twilling our thumbs and going like, I just don't know. We were, don't worry, we are, we're doing all the things to get him. It's really cool because your voice, I was a little worried. I was afraid that when I got home that voices might trigger it and actually children's voices trigger it a bit, trigger the dual note that happens.
Your voice does not. Mm-hmm. I've got you both ears right now, nice and loud and the cans. These are, this musician, this studio speak for headphones.
So I'm not hearing that and it sounds warm and it sounds reassuring and I felt really good about that yesterday when you picked me up at the airport. It might really calm me down because I was rough. I had like, I had three flights yesterday, I flew from London. It was so crazy, I got to the airport at like one in the morning, waited for my first flight to Amsterdam at- Yeah, you were driven to the airport right after your last show.
So no sleep, no hotel, just right, yeah. Right, right to Heathrow and then Amsterdam, Atlanta, where they misplaced my base. We're still waiting for it to show up here in Greenfield. I said to the guy, the Delta guy in Atlanta, like so, I mean, he, I gave him my, the baggage claim, he's like, oh, yeah, that's not here.
And I said, oh, so it's lost and I didn't, you know, I was like, I'm taking a very, when I'm at the airport now, I was like, it's lost. I mean, I was like, oh, it's lost. You know what, I'm just gonna say, that was my town. And then, so it's not lost, it's missing.
That was not true. Isn't that kind of the same thing? Missing person, it's not true person. That's why he keeps saying anus.
This is just the outside. Oh my god, you're subjecting the listeners to the sizzle. People should go back and listen to your own episode. Up to an act down your butt.
Oh no. That's right, binge. Then, yeah, yeah. Seasons one and two guys.
My journey with these two. Knuckleheads. Okay, time to go. I'm Fortrachmania.
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