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Creating a Happy Life

Psychologist Dr. Bill Crawford offers his thoughts on why the "happy life" we all want seems so hard to attain and what we can do find the happiness we seek, starting now.

An episode of the Quotes from the Top of the Mind™ podcast, hosted by Bill Crawford, Ph.D., titled "Creating a Happy Life" was published on April 2, 2009 and runs 7 minutes.

April 2, 2009 ·7m · Quotes from the Top of the Mind™

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Summary

"A happy life is just a string of happy moments, but most people don't create the happy moments because they're so busy chasing a happy life." – Adapted from Esther Hicks This quote was chosen for its wisdom in helping us understand what is required to create a happy life. For example, while most people would say that happiness is what they want, they also seem to believe that this illusive state lies somewhere in the future. "I will be happy when: I get the job/house/car I want, when I get married/divorced, when I have a certain amount of money, and/or when my boss/lover/son/daughter/mother /father/husband/wife/company/etc., starts treating me better! In the meantime, I've got to go to work, do the laundry, take care of the kids, and pay the bills, so get out of my way because I'm already late!" In other words, they seem to believe that something or someone "out there" must change in order for them to be happy, and that they have no expectation that this change is going to happen any time soon. A common belief, to be sure, however, I wonder if it's really serving us or really helping us achieve what we say we want, i.e., a happy life. This week's quote, on the other hand, offers a different perspective. It says that the positive experience we want is not necessarily in the future, but can be created now if we are willing to see a happy life as a string of happy moments. As in Eckhart Tolle's book, "The Power of Now," and other writings on the subject, the message here is that we create our life one moment at a time and thus, the more purposeful we can be about the creation of this moment and the next, the more successful we will be in creating the sort of life (happy, meaningful, etc.) that we desire. Of course, this makes several assumptions: That we are clear about the experience of life we want to create. That we are willing to take 100% responsibility for the creation of this experience. That we are willing to look at this moment (what we are doing, and how we are feeling right now) as the place to start. Unfortunately, many people do not share this clarity and willingness, and thus find themselves chasing what they say they most want. I suggest we stop the chase and start the process of purposeful creation. For example, what are you doing right now? Reading this quote and comment, right? Is it enjoyable? If so, congratulations! You have successfully begun! If not, I would encourage you to stop reading this and start doing what you enjoy. Bottom line: the criteria we choose to use will determine the quality of the moment-by-moment choices, which will combine to determine the quality of our life. Here's to creating as many meaningful, joyful, and happy moments as possible so that when all is said and done, we can look back at the life we have created and smile.

Episode Description

"A happy life is just a string of happy moments, but most people don't create the happy moments because they're so busy chasing a happy life." – Adapted from Esther Hicks This quote was chosen for its wisdom in helping us understand what is required to create a happy life. For example, while most people would say that happiness is what they want, they also seem to believe that this illusive state lies somewhere in the future. "I will be happy when: I get the job/house/car I want, when I get married/divorced, when I have a certain amount of money, and/or when my boss/lover/son/daughter/mother /father/husband/wife/company/etc., starts treating me better! In the meantime, I've got to go to work, do the laundry, take care of the kids, and pay the bills, so get out of my way because I'm already late!" In other words, they seem to believe that something or someone "out there" must change in order for them to be happy, and that they have no expectation that this change is going to happen any time soon. A common belief, to be sure, however, I wonder if it's really serving us or really helping us achieve what we say we want, i.e., a happy life. This week's quote, on the other hand, offers a different perspective. It says that the positive experience we want is not necessarily in the future, but can be created now if we are willing to see a happy life as a string of happy moments. As in Eckhart Tolle's book, "The Power of Now," and other writings on the subject, the message here is that we create our life one moment at a time and thus, the more purposeful we can be about the creation of this moment and the next, the more successful we will be in creating the sort of life (happy, meaningful, etc.) that we desire. Of course, this makes several assumptions: That we are clear about the experience of life we want to create. That we are willing to take 100% responsibility for the creation of this experience. That we are willing to look at this moment (what we are doing, and how we are feeling right now) as the place to start. Unfortunately, many people do not share this clarity and willingness, and thus find themselves chasing what they say they most want. I suggest we stop the chase and start the process of purposeful creation. For example, what are you doing right now? Reading this quote and comment, right? Is it enjoyable? If so, congratulations! You have successfully begun! If not, I would encourage you to stop reading this and start doing what you enjoy. Bottom line: the criteria we choose to use will determine the quality of the moment-by-moment choices, which will combine to determine the quality of our life. Here's to creating as many meaningful, joyful, and happy moments as possible so that when all is said and done, we can look back at the life we have created and smile.

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