Ep 85: 5 Steps to Quiet Your Inner Critic and Lead with "Human Skills"

We often think our inner critic is just who we are, but that is not the truth. If you aren't cognizant, that inner voice will start as a tiny snowflake and snowball until it convinces you that nothing is worth it anymore. In this episode, I share the specific five-step framework I use with my 1:1 clients and organizations to help them stop the spiral and interact better with one another.Tune in to hear a real-time example of how I navigated a trigger just last week when someone questioned if this podcast was "worth it". You will learn how to identify the specific toxic fuel you’ve been running on and swap it for the sustainable fuel of self-belief.Episode Highlights:Separation: Why you must visualize your critic as separate from your core self (and why you shouldn't name it after a family member!).The "Toxic Fuel" Myth: Understanding that shame and meanness are like gas—they burn dirty and eventually run out—whereas self-compassion is sustainable energy.The Interruption: How to use physical movement, music, or even a shower to physically cleanse the negative thought pattern.The Vacation Technique: You don't need to shame your critic; you need to love it enough to send it on a permanent vacation.Quotables: [01:05:26] "When it comes to your inner critics, it's often creating a narrative that you can't 100% confirm with certainty, which means it's a lie." [01:09:42] "Shame and a mean voice is not a sustainable way of motivating you... you're never going to move through tough emotions if you keep beating yourself up." [01:12:16] "Your inner critic loves you deeply... it's only using the tools that it has... trying to keep you safe from disappointment."Tosca's Links and Resources:Sign up for Tosca's Newsletter: http://toscadimatteo.com/newsletterTosca's Website: https://www.toscadimatteo.comInner Critic Packages with Tosca: https://www.toscadimatteo.com/contactLinkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/toscadimatteo/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/toscadimatteo/Props for: Theme music by Adrian DiMatteo https://adriandimatteo.com