Episode #247 Tools to Fight Perfectionism

Getting to Neutral: Tools to Fight Perfectionism and Win the Mental Game Good morning everybody, you’re listening to the Mindset Matters podcast, I’m your host Riley Jensen and today I want to talk about tools to fight perfectionism and win the mental game. Let me hit you with something right away—perfectionism isn’t a badge of honor. It’s a burden. But there’s a way out. It starts with what I call “getting to neutral.” This is about interrupting negative momentum—because when perfectionism spirals, it usually sounds like this: “I’m not good enough.” “I always screw this up.” “I can’t compete like they do.” “What if I let everyone down?” Sound familiar? Now pause. And breathe. Let me walk you through one of my favorite grounding techniques: 3-2-1 Breathe. Look around. What are 3 things you can see? What are 2 things you can hear? What’s 1 thing you can feel physically? Then… take one deep diaphragmatic breath. That’s it. That 30-second moment just broke the spiral. I recently heard a story from my friend Justin Su’a, a mental performance coach for the Tampa Bay Rays. He was 16, struggling on the mound, and it happened to be during a super important game. His dad—the coach—called a timeout. Walked up to the mound. But instead of offering advice, he asked: “Are you hungry?” Justin: “Uhhh… yeah?” “What kind of burger do you want?” Cheeseburger. Soda. His dad gives his own order too. Then walks away. That moment gave Justin a mental time out. It was the reset he needed. He refocused. They won the game. Sometimes the best way to reset is not to force yourself to "be great"—but to "just be." Here’s another technique I love: Counterarguments. Your thoughts aren’t always true just because they’re loud. If your brain says, “I don’t belong here…” Push back with: “That’s not necessarily true… I’ve worked hard, and I’ve earned this shot.” Better yet? Make a list before the storm hits—of your wins, achievements, and moments you’re proud of. Keep it close. Use it when perfectionism rears its head. Then there's what I call Caboose Arguments—because some of us are realists. And sometimes, we don’t believe our own hype. So instead of saying, “This game is going terribly,” add the caboose: “…but I’ve gotten out of worse spots.” “…but I’ve prepared for this.” “…but I know how to adjust.” Now we’re not ignoring the challenge—we’re just not letting it define the whole train. And here's one more tool: “Yet.” It’s a single word that shifts everything. “I can’t shoot like them… yet.” “I don’t know how to handle pressure… yet.” “I haven’t figured this out… yet.” That one word keeps the story going. You’re still in the fight. You are a work in progress. Need a physical reset? Build a reset routine. Athletes I work with use all kinds: Re-tightening gloves Re-doing a hair tie Tapping a control circle on their wrist Even flushing a toilet in the dugout like Ken Ravizza’s Fullerton State baseball team (yes, really) It’s all about signaling to your brain: That moment is done. Time to move on. 🎯 Let’s make it real right now. Three quick challenges for you: Practice bravery. Do one thing that makes you uncomfortable today. Apply for that job. Start that project. Ask for help. Challenge your thoughts. Next time you hear your inner critic, say: “That might not be true… because ________.” Flip your self-talk. If you wouldn’t say it to someone else, don’t say it to yourself. Listen: Perfection isn’t required to win. All you need is the courage to reset, the awareness to interrupt the spiral, and the tools to get back to the moment you’re in. You don’t have to be perfect. You just need to breathe. You’ve got this.