This is the Ramsey Call of the Day, part of the Ramsey Network. Colton starts off this hour in Amarillo, Texas. Hey, Colton, how are you? I'm doing very well with you.
Better than I deserve, sir. How can we help? So I actually just moved back to the United States where I'm off earlier. And my girlfriend is very adamant about me getting a credit card.
She says I needed to survive an American. She's worried that if I don't get one, I'm a feature if we decide to get married that it might bite us in a boat and become getting a mortgage and all that. I don't want one. You actually help my parents to get out of credit card debt a few years ago.
And I just don't know what to do about it. I don't know how to approach her about talking about that and explaining it without saying what to jerk. What have the conversations been like when you say, hey, I don't want a credit card, I don't believe in going into debt. I think there's another way.
What is her reaction? Well, she's kind of... I guess from my interpretation she thinks that I don't understand what it is because everyone in the air is waiting off credit cards and card payments. And she thinks it's a necessary thing.
What are you doing with this? What are you doing with this? How long have you been dating? About two years now.
What are the things she condescending to you about? Let's see. I guess sometimes I'm kind of a... When it comes to the emotional guy, when it comes to showing love and stuff, she's not always that kind of person.
I really don't know. How long have you been dating again? About two years. Two years?
Wow. And you've been back in the States for two years? No, I actually just been back here in the very beginning of December. I actually threaded the needle in the game on the hospital.
So it was kind of a long-distance relationship up until the last few months. So we actually met as missionaries overseas. I can't say exactly where, but then we started dating about a year after departing. Okay.
This is going to be a conversation where you need to maybe show her some information, not to prove her wrong, but just to show her that there is another way. And so one of the easiest ways to do that, we did an episode on the fine print about this very topic called the Dirty Truth Behind Your Credit Score. We also did one on credit card rewards. So depending on what angle sounds like, she's saying, well, you need debt to survive, and if you need debt, you need a high credit score, and therefore you need to use the credit card.
And so in a logical sense, we can show her that you don't need those things, and I've gotten the mortgage without a credit score. And so it can be done, but she's going to need to get some new information in order to maybe see that. What were you guys missionaries for, Bank of America? No, actually, you were through the mission.
Yeah, you were through the mission. Christian missionaries. So Bible believes it. Yes, sir.
Let me help you with this. Let's maybe have this discussion through a different lens. Okay. I would challenge either one of you, as I have people for decades.
You wouldn't be the first to. To find me one time in Scripture that God used debt to deliver his people or bless his people, show me one positive reference to debt in Scripture. By the way, I'll help you with this. Here's a hack.
It's not there. It's not a sin listed in Scripture, but 100% of the time that debt is mentioned in the Bible is a negative reference. You're a fool. You're a slave.
You're impulsive. These are the things that come around the word debt as you read through and study the Scriptures, and there's hundreds and hundreds of references to debt in the Scripture, and they're all negative. So if we're going to look at this through the lens of the Bible, which your founder, Lauren Cunningham, would tell you to have done it, youth with a mission, very familiar with your ministry and an admirer of the ministry, by the way. Thank you.
But the, you know, if you look at this through the lens of Scripture, there's nothing in there that says that debt is the way to win. As a matter of fact, it says it's the way to lose. No, it's not a salvation issue and it's not a sin. It's just biblically speaking, stupid.
That's what it amounts to. And so maybe that's a way to have the discussion. And then you can also go at it with secular or mainstream information like George is talking about, because here's the thing. You're 22 years old.
Okay. She's 22 years old. She does not have all the answers to the money equation. I can assure you of this, sir.
As a matter of fact, she has almost none of the answers, and she's pretty condescending about the fact that she knows nothing. So here's the thing. You can get a mortgage without a credit score. It's called manual underwriting.
If you want to buy a car, you should pay cash if you want to become wealthy and build wealth. Yes, sir. That's actually one of the arguments that I have and I haven't made it yet because she's paying off a vehicle. Yeah, which was stupid.
Now, I've been stupid too. I've had car payments. I've had lots of payments. I've had lots of stupid stuff.
That's what qualifies me to teach this is I've looked. I got stupid a bunch of it in the rearview mirror. And so, I mean, I made an art form for a while. So, you know, her little car payment is not nearly stupid as I've been.
But, and then lastly is this, you know, the thing as a father of grown children, which is an oxymoron, as a father of grownups, the thing that concerns me the most about this conversation is how condescending she is towards you from a relationship standpoint. As if you're a doofus and she has it all figured out, which from my seat is kind of funny, laughable, except they accept it how it plays out in your relationship. So, I think that that needs to be addressed in your relationship going forward, that you guys can have a conversation where you have equal footing intellectually, spiritually, to have a calm, good, mature discussion about something instead of her going, well, you just don't know, little man. You're freaking 22, lady.
I mean, seriously, I got socks older than you. So, you know, it's just ridiculous, you know. But if it's a values thing, it may not work out long term. Money fights, money problems, number one causes divorce.
So, either you guys get on the same page or this may not be the right fit forever. Sorry. Yeah, that's a possibility too. Maybe you're a signal.
Thanks for tuning in to the Ramsey Call of the Day. To check out all of our podcast, just search Ramsey Network on Apple Podcast, Spotify, or wherever you listen.