Not Everyone Deserves Unlimited Access to You | The Loneliness Cure Ep. 7

Saying yes to everyone is saying no to yourself.In this episode, Maya and Malikiya dive into the uncomfortable truth about boundaries versus people-pleasing, and why setting boundaries isn't selfish, it's survival.They break down how people-pleasing leads to burnout, undercharging, and resentment. They talk about Jesus having boundaries (yes, even Jesus said no), getting in God's way by trying to save people, and why strangers often respect you more than the people closest to you.Here's what we talk about:PEOPLE-PLEASING = BURNOUTMalikiya has gotten better at saying no to people, but she's still burning out by staying busy with tasks that could wait. Maya still struggles with saying yes to friends because she doesn't want them to feel some type of way, even when she's exhausted.HOW OVERGIVING AFFECTS YOUR INCOMEMalikiya breaks down how people-pleasing affects her income: When she overgives time and energy, her mental capacity depletes. Thinking hurts. She can't create, articulate, or show up fully. And when your income is based on creativity, that's a problem.UNDERCHARGING OUT OF GUILTMalikiya admits she undercharges because she knows she'll be depleted halfway through. She feels guilty knowing she won't be able to give her best, so she lowers her price from the jump. But her work is still high quality, she's just hard on herself.JESUS HAD BOUNDARIESMaya reminds us: Jesus had very strong boundaries. So where has God told you to step back? For Malikiya, it's control, trying to orchestrate life instead of just observing and letting things unfold.GETTING IN GOD'S WAYMaya shares a powerful realization: Sometimes when you try to "save" people, you're getting in God's way. They might need to go to that low place to find Him. You might be preventing them from building their own relationship with God by trying to be God in their life.NATURAL VS. FORCED GOD CONVERSATIONSMalikiya asks: How do you know when God is prompting you to help someone vs. you just trying to fix them? Maya explains the difference, when God prompts it, it happens naturally in conversation. When you force it, people push back.BOUNDARIES CREATE HEALTHY RELATIONSHIPSHaving boundaries helps you show up better AND helps you see who people really are. If someone knows your boundary and keeps crossing it, they're either not emotionally intelligent, they don't care, or they lack confidence to ask for clarification. Either way, it tells you who they are.STRANGERS RESPECT YOU MORE THAN FRIENDSMalikiya points out something wild: Strangers can give you full respect without thinking about it, but people who know you cross your boundaries repeatedly. If a stranger can respect you without being told, why are you accepting less from people who claim to love you?WHAT HAPPENS WHEN THERE ARE NO BOUNDARIES?Your life isn't yours. People dictate your choices. They take advantage and feel no remorse. You feel unseen and uncared for. And eventually, you cut people off. Then they say "you changed." No, they didn't listen.NOT EVERYONE DESERVES UNLIMITED ACCESS TO YOUIt's hard to pull back access because you feel like you're hurting people. But you'll be a better person because of it. You'll treat people better because you're not carrying so much.New episodes every Monday.Follow us:Instagram/TikTok: @thelonelinesscurepodTexas Sistas Society: @txsistasocietyShoutouts:ZayD Productions - Camera, lighting, productionThe Concord - Austin, TX (Pershing East Coffee Shop) - Recording venueSubscribe so you don't miss the next episode.