Passive Agressive Behaviour
Episode 89 of the The Relationship Guy podcast, hosted by John Kenny, titled "Passive Agressive Behaviour" was published on March 3, 2023 and runs 18 minutes.
March 3, 2023 ·18m · The Relationship Guy
Summary
Most people know someone who is referred to as having passive-aggressive behaviour, but what does it mean and what negative effects can it have on our relationships? John explains why so many people resort to passive aggression, how it is utilised and how you can identify and address your own behaviour. KEY TAKEAWAYS Passive Aggression can be defined as ‘sugar-coated hostility’. It is aggression presented in a passive way which makes it easily missed, difficult to define and easily denied if pointed out. Passive Aggressive people take advantage of the behaviour’s plausible deniability, direct aggression is very much more quantifiable by the target whereas passive aggression always has the option of ‘that’s not what I meant’. Look out for sulking and silent treatment, very common behaviours in someone who employs passive aggression. Huffing, sighing, tutting and slamming doors are also ways of expressing aggression without actually addressing the issue. Do you find yourself avoiding people that you’re upset with? Do you punish others by putting things off, turning up late or just not doing things? Then you may have passive-aggressive traits. BEST MOMENTS ‘Passive-aggressive behaviour is a pattern of expressing negative feelings indirectly instead of addressing them openly.’ ‘It’s not, in itself, a mental illness but gets people’s needs met in a maladaptive way.’ ‘They may use sarcasm, or ‘banter’. I personally very much dislike the word ‘banter’ as to me it always seems to mean ‘I’m insulting you or being rude, but I’m only joking.’ ‘Bearing a grudge is a common passive aggressive trait.’ ‘Recognising your own behaviours is the first step to change but give yourself some time to implement the changes as you are likely to meet some resistance within you when you do so.’ VALUABLE RESOURCES Links: www.johnkennycoaching.comThe Bicycle Affect: https://youtu.be/oO7XZGvdWnoRelationship Video course and 1-2-1 coaching: Relationship Ready Online Programme - John Kenny (johnkennycoaching.com)To get in touch - email – [email protected] or book a complimentary call –https://calendly.com/johnkennycoaching/30minIf people want to order a copy of the book then they can just pay postage of £4.95 (RRP £8.99) - www.johnkennycoaching.com/podcast-book-offerWant to be able to address the relationship issues in your life? - Why not book in for a complimentary call and we can discuss how you can get the new started with some new types of relationships - https://calendly.com/johnkennycoaching/30minThe Relationship Guy Podcast - https://omny.fm/shows/the-relationship-guy ABOUT THE HOST I am John Kenny, Award Winning Relationship Coach.Coaching people to experience healthy loving relationships. Having spent a life choosing unhealthy relationships and self sabotaging my own success, I now coach people to live a life they choose. CONTACT METHOD Facebook – https://www.facebook.com/johnkennycoaching LinkedIn – https://www.linkedin.com/in/john-kenny-coaching Insta – https://www.instagram.com/johnkennycoaching/ Twitter – https://www.twitter.com/johnkennycoach YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCHTj9x6Tlo7lcIJITyx-tgQ Clubhouse - @relationshipguy Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Episode Description
Most people know someone who is referred to as having passive-aggressive behaviour, but what does it mean and what negative effects can it have on our relationships? John explains why so many people resort to passive aggression, how it is utilised and how you can identify and address your own behaviour.
KEY TAKEAWAYS
- Passive Aggression can be defined as ‘sugar-coated hostility’. It is aggression presented in a passive way which makes it easily missed, difficult to define and easily denied if pointed out.
- Passive Aggressive people take advantage of the behaviour’s plausible deniability, direct aggression is very much more quantifiable by the target whereas passive aggression always has the option of ‘that’s not what I meant’.
- Look out for sulking and silent treatment, very common behaviours in someone who employs passive aggression. Huffing, sighing, tutting and slamming doors are also ways of expressing aggression without actually addressing the issue.
- Do you find yourself avoiding people that you’re upset with? Do you punish others by putting things off, turning up late or just not doing things? Then you may have passive-aggressive traits.
BEST MOMENTS
‘Passive-aggressive behaviour is a pattern of expressing negative feelings indirectly instead of addressing them openly.’
‘It’s not, in itself, a mental illness but gets people’s needs met in a maladaptive way.’
‘They may use sarcasm, or ‘banter’. I personally very much dislike the word ‘banter’ as to me it always seems to mean ‘I’m insulting you or being rude, but I’m only joking.’
‘Bearing a grudge is a common passive aggressive trait.’
‘Recognising your own behaviours is the first step to change but give yourself some time to implement the changes as you are likely to meet some resistance within you when you do so.’
VALUABLE RESOURCES
Links: www.johnkennycoaching.com
The Bicycle Affect: https://youtu.be/oO7XZGvdWno
Relationship Video course and 1-2-1 coaching: Relationship Ready Online Programme - John Kenny (johnkennycoaching.com)
To get in touch - email – [email protected] or book a complimentary call –https://calendly.com/johnkennycoaching/30min
If people want to order a copy of the book then they can just pay postage of £4.95 (RRP £8.99) - www.johnkennycoaching.com/podcast-book-offer
Want to be able to address the relationship issues in your life? - Why not book in for a complimentary call and we can discuss how you can get the new started with some new types of relationships - https://calendly.com/johnkennycoaching/30min
The Relationship Guy Podcast - https://omny.fm/shows/the-relationship-guy
ABOUT THE HOST
I am John Kenny, Award Winning Relationship Coach.
Coaching people to experience healthy loving relationships. Having spent a life choosing unhealthy relationships and self sabotaging my own success, I now coach people to live a life they choose.
CONTACT METHOD
Facebook –
https://www.facebook.com/johnkennycoaching
LinkedIn –
https://www.linkedin.com/in/john-kenny-coaching
Insta –
https://www.instagram.com/johnkennycoaching/
Twitter –
https://www.twitter.com/johnkennycoach
YouTube -
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCHTj9x6Tlo7lcIJITyx-tgQ
Clubhouse - @relationshipguy
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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