Hey, Pardon My Take listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. Stella Blue Coffee is more than just great coffee. It's coffee with a purpose.
Introducing We Brew to Rescue, a nationwide campaign using proceeds from our new ready-to-drink cans to help fund 1,000 pet adoptions this year. Every can you crack open helps a real pet find a real home. Simple as that. Made with 100% Colombian coffee, each 11-ounce can delivers smooth, drinkable energy with a boost of protein.
Available in espresso cafe mocha and espresso sweet cream. Built for mornings, long days, and everything in between. Drink Stella Blue, fuel your day, and help save a pet's life. You can follow our progress in real time throughout the campaign by watching the Adoption Tracker on our site.
Grab yours now at StellaBlueCoffee.com, Amazon, and select retailers nationwide. On today's part of my take, Peyton Manning. Yes, Peyton Manning, Hall of Famer Peyton Manning before his Hall of Fame induction. Later on this week, we have Peyton Manning on the show, The Sheriff.
We also have a recap of everything. A lot of stuff happened during our vacation week. We'll talk about it. Olympics still going on.
Who's back in the week? And then we have the Mount Rushmore of combinations, which is very open-ended, which always means it will probably be chaos, contention, everything in the Mount Rushmore today. Great Monday show to get back in the swing. We're back in the studio, and we're brought to you by our friends at Stella Blue Coffee's new can lattes are here.
Crafted with 100% Colombian coffee, each can is a good source of protein and comes in two smooth flavors, espresso cafe mocha and espresso sweet cream. And whether you're braving your morning commute or chasing your pup, Stella Blue cans are for those always on the go and for those who care. Stella Blue is more than just great coffee. It's about giving back.
I named the brand after my rescue dog, Stella, who inspired our mission to help more dogs find their forever homes. Every purchase supports animal rescue organizations, so when you drink Stella Blue, you're not just fueling your day. You're saving a dog's life. Try the new cans today.
Taste the difference and make a difference. All new Stella Blue coffee can lattes now available at StellaBlueCoffee.com or subscribe on Amazon for 10% off. Okay, let's go. This part of my take presented by Mattress Firm.
Make sure you unjunct your sleep with MattressFirm.com or visit a Mattress Firm store today. Today is Monday, August 2nd, and I am never going on vacation again. I'm sorry, Hank. No more vacations.
Everything that could have happened poorly in my life happened. Sports life, I should say. I had a wonderful vacation with my family. Father, too, so don't say mean things to me.
But holy shit, I can never go on vacation again. It was just a firefest all around for everybody on this podcast. Everyone had a firefest happen to us over the weekend except for Jake. Yeah, except for Jake, who we'll talk to him.
We'll talk about his big debut on the cock. But yeah, I made a quick list. So in the past week, Aaron Rodgers decided to unretire, which, you know, we're going to talk about that in a second. No, I have a much more plain way to put it.
Aaron Rodgers decided that he was going to be a div and take Blake Bortles' job. Yes, yes, yes. Blake Bortles got cut. Aaron Rodgers unretired.
And I know, deep down, I was like, he's obviously going to come back. But I also believed that maybe he would actually retire. The Cubs traded everyone, everyone, the entire court. And then everyone decided to homer in their debut with their new team in consecutive days.
Anthony Rizzo hit a Yabo on Friday for the Yankees. Javi Baez on Saturday for the Mets. And then Chris Bryant, and they're calling him Bryant Giant. And I want to fucking kill myself.
Chris Giant is what I'm doing. Chris Giant, homer for the Giants on Sunday. And Djokovic with Drew. Everyone knows I'm a huge Djokovic guy.
So the Gold Slam is now defunct. The Water Dogs are good, so I can't make fun of them anymore. That fucking sucks. And then I got attacked by J-Lo stands last week.
And a bunch of, like, 16-year-old girls online made me feel like an asshole. That was fun. That one doesn't count as being a bad thing that happened. I just felt bullied.
And you know what else is kind of cool is that Schwarber has not made his debut for the Red Sox yet. So you'll get a second wave when Schwarber goes Yabo in his first, and probably his first at-bat for Boston. We're passing Schwarber around like a little bitch. Now he's Hank's.
And he would be perfect for the Yankees with that short corpse. Enjoy it, Hank. What were those three hurts the most? The Cubs I was ready for, even though the prolonged, like, I don't know how they figured out the way to get all three of those guys to debut in different days, and then all of them to Homer.
And everyone would just be like, wow, this really, really sucks. Like, Rodgers is definitely, like, fuck him. Which Cubs player does hurt you the most to see them doing well with their new team? Oh, good question, Hank.
So, the heart, says Anthony Rizzo, because he's the de facto captain of the Cubs. He's the guy who turned it all around. The head says, you have a 29-year-old Chris Bryant, who's a stud, who you can only dream of getting a guy like that, and somehow the Cubs didn't figure out a way to extend him and have him be a Cub for life. So that would be my, and then probably my balls is Javi Baez, because he plays a big cone.
Well, also, I mean, with Djokovic, there was no way that we could have seen a meltdown like that coming from a class act like Djokovic. No, no. He smashed his racket, which is, like, say what you want about Djokovic and his entire personality and his body of work, but he usually treats the sporting equipment very well. Agreed.
And he's always a class act, and I would never imagine that he would break two rackets and then withdraw and force his mixed doubles partner to not win a medal. Yeah. He quit. He quit.
He quit. Did he quit? Or did he get the twisties? Or he's a hero.
He might have gotten the twisties out there. He's had COVID like seven times. It's like him and the president of Brazil lead the league and how many COVID infections they can get, so he might be dealing with some long-haul issues himself. It would have been funny if Djokovic said he had mental health issues just to watch people twist and turn, get the twisties online, trying to figure out how his mental health is actually not appropriate.
Well, he couldn't say that because I think, like, 24 hours before he withdrew, he went at Simone Biles for quitting. So that would have been a tough turnaround. He had the twisties in his own taste. See, I love rooting for Djokovic because I'm a selective Djokovic fan.
I just, I don't care about tennis. I don't care for tennis as a sport, so I can just pick and choose when I want to be a fan of his. This week, I'm not a fan of this. I would say that tennis is more of an event.
Tennis is a lifestyle, not really a sport. If you can play a game until you're, like, 80, it's not a sport. Yeah, no, if you pick up a sport after you retire, that's not a sport. That's, like, the thing they always say, like, hey, take up golf and tennis because you can play it for your whole life.
Well, that's not a sport. It's a leisurely activity. Right, I'm going to get into knitting after I retire. Did you see that?
That was pretty cool. Who was it? I think he was a diver, I think, and he was killing the time in between his dives, as opposed to, like, most of the guys, they dive, and then they stand under a shower. Or they get in the tub.
They're in the tub, too. They look awesome. I would be a tub guy, but some of these guys are just straight up showering in between each dive. This guy, I think he's from Australia, maybe France.
I think France or Australia vibes. He just goes up into the stands and starts knitting in between dives. I say go for it. We need more weirdos like that.
If we can't watch Michael Phelps' mom wearing, like, an entire tuxedo of denim, cheering for her son during the pool events, at least show the athletes themselves going to the stands doing stuff. Yes, knitting and doing weird shit. Also, I'll give you some spin zones because there are some positive things that came out this weekend. One, Love is Blind is back.
They had the reunion show, which I watched. Fuck Damien. Damien's a piece of shit. I haven't watched it yet.
Don't do that. Messick is back in a big way. Messick just embarrasses herself. You'll enjoy it.
Barnett's around. The whole crew's there. There's just, like, one new person. We'll get into it later.
We'll watch that. We'll discuss it later. But that's good. The Hasbola fight is probably going to happen.
Although I just think it's one of those things where they're just going to get closer and closer to the fight and have people talk about it. It's like the aero paradox. Hasbola and the other guy, they're going to get so close, they'll get halfway closer, halfway closer, but their adorable little arms will never be able to reach. Yep.
Outer Banks 2 is back. Outer Banks 2 is back. I'm going to binge that this week. You can't spoil it.
You can't spoil something like that. It'd be like spoiling the Mona Lisa. You still got to see it in person. NBC realized that their ratings were way, way down for this Olympics, so they hit the great glass in case of emergency button, which is, let's get Snoop on a broadcast, which kind of works.
There's another who's back for Hank. What are we doing? We're just doing them all. I'm trying to put a smile on my friend Big Cat's face, Hank.
He's had a rough week. All of his heroes left him. Yeah. All right, let's talk about Aaron Rodgers, though, because I did promise I would talk about it.
I spent a whole week ignoring it. The Green Bay Packers are a classless organization by cutting Blake Portals. But, not spin zone, but something you didn't think would come out of my mouth, I'm defending Aaron Rodgers. When he gave his press conference, and he explained why he was upset.
You just like Aaron Rodgers because he hates the Packers more than you. Correct. The way he framed the Packers organization, he said, Green Bay is no paradise. He said, these are all his quotes.
I think we can all understand Green Bay isn't a huge vacation destination. People are coming here to play with me, play with our team, knowing that they can win a championship here, and the fact that, well, go to the NFC championship is what he meant. Make the playoffs consistent. Yeah, and the fact that I haven't been used in those discussions was, one, I wanted to change moving forward.
So, basically, the Packers organization have a once-in-a-generation quarterback, incredibly talented guy, three-time MVP, and they're like, yeah, fuck him, we're not going to listen to anything he says. Why would anyone want to play for this organization? I agree with Aaron Rodgers. He also went on to talk about how they mistreated great locker room guys, high-character guys, these are getting his quotes, who weren't offered a contract at all, or were extremely low-balled, or, maybe in my opinion, not given the respect of the way out, the guys with their status and stature and high-character deserves.
So, I agree. If you're the Packers, you have to give John Coon like a Kobe Bryant-type contract at the end of his career and be like, thank you for all the service you put in. Meanwhile, Sean Payton sees him, he's like, yeah, he doesn't need to practice during a week, we'll pay him a million dollars per month that he's here, just go run into people. The Packers could have done that.
All I'm saying is, what he said, and these are his words, not mine, make a lot of sense, that the Packers, you go to the Packers, and they will not treat you well. And Aaron Rodgers laid it all out. And I actually think, like, it's kind of fair what he said. Nothing he said was that crazy.
I do think he's a little bit of a diva, loves the drama, loves to have everyone talking about what will Aaron Rodgers do. I don't think that his teammates hate him. I think they probably were like, thanks for standing up for us. But I do think that if you're a free agent listening to the show right now, Will Compton, don't you dare go to the Green Bay Packers because they will mistreat you, they will cut you like they did to Blake Orwell.
Blake Orwell's just a number to them. Like, they threw him to the side. So, I don't know, probably least desirable team to play for in the NFL, according to Aaron Rodgers, not me, Aaron Rodgers. I would add that as an owner of the Green Bay Packers, what they're doing right now is against all sorts of SEC violations and rules and regulations as far as stock ownership goes.
They have not consulted any of the ownership on any of this. Like, their general manager. Basically, you can actually take back what Aaron Rodgers is mad about. I think three things.
One is he's still pissed that he didn't start immediately when he was drafted. I think he holds, like, the Brett Favre years, where Brett Favre was just being a raving lunatic up in Green Bay, and Aaron was like, I could be a top-five quarterback in the NFL, but they're not playing me. I think he's still pissed about that. I think that he's furious that Jordy Nelson wasn't resigned.
And Charles Woodson. Jordy was, like, his best friend. And then, yeah, Charles Woodson. And then the third one I was going to say would be Cobb.
Letting Cobb get away. Cobb is a guy that, like, every quarterback, like, Aaron Rodgers would love because he would always just be within five yards of the line of scrimmage at any given point and could always count on him to just jack up his completion percentage. So Aaron was pissed when they let him go, but he's... And the Jordan Love.
The Jordan Love thing, absolutely, because... And I understand it. The Packers didn't expect him to have an MVP year. They didn't expect him to still be peaking as a quarterback.
And so that, like, he looked at it last year and was like, well, we could have had a wide receiver or someone who could have helped us. Instead, we're using a first-round pick on a backup, which makes sense. So what level of, say, do you think Aaron Rodgers should get? In terms of, like, right now, if you're trying to decide what to do for the future of the Packers, and you're thinking, like, should I give a massive contract to a free agent, how many more years does Aaron Rodgers get to be general manager?
So sports are obviously so different now than they were 20 years ago, 10 years ago. In the NBA and the NFL, it is kind of... The NBA has had it. The NBA has had their, like, reckoning, where it's like, hey, your star kind of runs your team, and you have to do what they want to do to keep them happy.
The NFL hasn't gotten there because it's bigger rosters. It's more of a team sport. But I do think the quarterback position, and there's only a few guys, but there are a few guys that an organization should absolutely listen to what they want to do, and it's pretty much Aaron Rodgers, Tom Brady, Patrick Mahomes, and probably Russell Wilson. Like, those are the guys right now.
And, you know, there's guys that could be that, you know. You could be in a situation where Josh Allen or Lamar Jackson, some of these guys who are ascending, but right now there's a few guys that if you were running an organization and you're the general manager, you don't have to listen to them all the time, but one of your top, like, checklists that you check off every day is, is my generational talent quarterback top five guy who wins us games and makes me look better than I am at my job? Because let's be honest, those guys make you look better, like, week in, week out, year in, year out. Is that guy happy?
That should be your, like, one of your top things you check off every single day, and the Packers clearly haven't been doing it. I think that Ben Roethlisberger was one of those guys, but in, like, an opposite version of what Aaron Rodgers wants, it was, like, Ben finding a guy that he doesn't want to still be in Pittsburgh next year, and then they would get moved out of town. Now, I don't want to make this, Hank, about the Patriots, but it does kind of put into perspective how crazy it is that Belichick and Brady got along for so long, and, like, how they made that work. Because you can see, you know, obviously Aaron Rodgers is still on the Packers, but these things happen, and it's hard to manage egos, it's hard to manage talent, and I do think that your quarterback is the one guy, if you have that type of quarterback, that you should listen to him.
I don't know. Your comments on the Brady analogy? I agree. It is, like, it probably could have fallen apart many times before that.
It did kind of fall apart at the end. And obviously, yeah, and obviously, Rodgers has been with the Packers for a long time, so it's not like they haven't been able to keep it together, but it does feel like this, it feels like Aaron Rodgers... There was a lot of tension with Garoppolo. Once he got out of town, they got back together.
There was definitely a similar thing going on when they drafted Garoppolo, and then, like, inside the organization before, like, they wanted, you know, they wanted to play Jimmy. If I were the GM of one of these teams, I would listen to the quarterback and just be like, yeah, it was his idea. Like, if he fucks up, he's like, all right, well, it was your idea. Then everybody in the media will be like, yeah, that guy's a diva.
And so you totally skate by. Yeah, no, you're right, there are two things that a general manager can do. It takes in his time. One is drafting a quarterback, and the other is then placing all the blame on that quarterback that he drafted.
Now, I still hate Aaron Rodgers so much for just going through this charade. I think he's got the man bun now. Well, yeah, the man bun, but he put me through a, I'll call it a but what if, because I knew he was going to be on the Packers. Like, I knew it.
But deep down, I'd have conversations, and I'd be like, but what if? What if he does retire? And that was stupid. That was a stupid thought to have in my brain, but it was there.
It existed. I'm coming clean with that right now. Packers fans can roast me for even entertaining that thought. But it was a reality.
I had those little, like, I'd be daydreaming in the middle of fucking, I don't know, April or May, and be like, what if Aaron Rodgers is going to retire? And I hate that he did that to me. We'll really see how deep his convictions lie. Is Aaron Rodgers a man of principle, or is Aaron Rodgers going to be swayed by just nice words and platitudes from his bosses?
Because, Big Cat, if he is actually a man that believes what he says, and certainly actually believes what he says right now, and he's saying with his chest, he's going to retire in the middle of the season before a game against a division rival to inflict maximum pain upon the Green Bay Packers. So, Aaron, I would suggest maybe quitting before a game against the Bears. Maybe the day of a game against the Bears. I do think that this will be either the last or second to last season for Aaron Rodgers.
I know that's not saying anything crazy, but I don't think they're going to do, like, some big deal. So, that is, because apparently the way that he was able to be like, all right, I'm comfortable coming back, because they ripped up his third year. So, 2023 is now no longer exists for him, where he can now go where he wants. So, and that would make sense.
They drafted Jordan Love. They were hoping that he's their future quarterback. I'm just, you just didn't have to do it this way, Aaron. I really didn't have to do it.
Think about the people that you hurt along the way, myself mostly. I also think that what Aaron's trying to do is, like, there's still a possibility of a sign-in trade, so you can still maybe think. Don't think that's going to happen. Because the way that he re-engineered his contract, if you look at it, was to make it easier to do a sign-in trade.
So, there's still interest in Denver from what I've been hearing behind the scenes. Denver wants, stop it. I'm serious. Denver wants Aaron Rodgers on their team this year.
But this will be the last year for Aaron, because I think what he wants to do is he wants to do a sign-in trade next year. He wants to go someplace for a one-year contract, and then be a mercenary year-to-year, and then just go ring-chasing all across. Maybe another, like, four years after that, playing for various teams. I think he's going to be a one-year deal kind of guy.
And now he's going to play with a chip on his shoulder. and he's going to do that whole fucking thing and the whole fuck you for it. He is absolutely one of those guys that needs a chip on his shoulder and when he does it, he plays that much better, so fuck everything. That doesn't actually make that much sense for him to have a chip on his shoulder and be like, I'll show these assholes at the Green Bay Packers, I'm going to win a Super Bowl.
He's going to win it and then he's going to be like, I want it for the fans, not for the front office and then I'm going to cry. He almost said, I love the Packers organization because I love the Packers fans. I saw that. I love the Packers fans.
I love the Packers fans. Which some way are the organization in Green Bay if you knew your history here. So he's back. Was terrible what they did to Blake Bortles.
That's what made me flip on there. He knew that this was going to make Blake lose his job. Yeah, yeah. It was fucked up.
We need Blake Bortles in Indy because Carson Wentz. Carson Wentz, what is Carson Wentz? How do you injure his foot? And also, Carson Wentz being like, I'm not going to get surgery?
Yeah, dude, this is for sure not going to linger all year and be another issue where it's like, hey, Carson Wentz, if he were 100, he's going to retire and everyone's going to be talking about that one year that he would have won MVP. Well, I forget what Carson Wentz looks like scrambling around the pocket healthy. Right. It's been so long that he just exists in a permanent state of having a foot injury.
So I don't know what he's planning on doing, having to just get better on his own. Who's the backup in Indy right now? Oh, yeah. Probably.
Jeff Blake Bortles. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. I remember we talked about that.
People got mad because we said that he's going to look fat in those teal uniforms. He is. He is. That's just a fact.
Jacob Eason and Sam Ellinger. Oh, Sam Ellinger. There we go. That's Billy's number one ranked quarterback.
Shout out Texas for making it official. That's going to be fun to watch. It's just incredibly. One thing I don't understand about the whole college football realignment thing, what did you think was going to happen?
Texas, they have no loyalties to anyone except for themselves. Correct. And so they were, of course, going to make happen whatever they wanted to happen. Conferences are just, they're made up.
They're completely made up. So you can have SEC pride or you can have Big 12 pride. But at the end of the day, it really doesn't mean anything. Well, I'll push back on just the fact that it sucks if there's going to be only two conferences or three conferences because I did like the different quirks about conferences.
I like that the Big 12 didn't play defense. Like, I like that the Big 10 plays 10-6 games. I don't know. There's just, there's things that I'm going to miss.
But at the end of the day, it's going to be very interesting to see how this all plays out because they say 2025 and the way it works is the Big 12 basically is going to try to stay together because if Texas and Oklahoma leave, they have to come to check. So it's going to just be like lame duck season after lame duck season if they can hold on and like force them. Otherwise, Texas and Oklahoma have to write them a huge check to bounce early. So this is how you can tell that the leaders of the conference.
I don't want to say the conferences are all bullshit because I agree. I like the regional aspect. I like the SEC playing against each other. I like the callers on the Paul Feinbaum show.
Like, if the SEC becomes half of the nation, I can't have people in like the state of Washington calling into the Paul Feinbaum show. Dude, the Big 10 might, the Big 10, like the move that people are at least saying could happen is the Big 10 could poach some of the Pac-12 because that would naturally make sense. You know, the Rose Bowl and the history there. That would suck too.
That would be weird. But here's how it typically plays out with the commissioners of these conferences. Once they get exposed for really just keeping things strung together with duct tape and strings so that they can make a shitload of money, they don't really have any sort of moral or legal recourse to anything so they just start crying about stuff. So the commission of the Big 12 was like, well, ESPN is talking to these schools and trying to get them to go to their conferences.
They just start crying and hoping to get public seminary on their side which is never going to happen because your job is literally made up. Right, and Greg Sankey, the SEC commissioner, just like basically owns everyone. He's the alpha in the room. He's just got his balls constantly on somebody else's table.
He even got Texas A&M to vote for it. He just walked in, he got him on the phone and was like, are you guys really going to complain? Do you want to piss away this fucking $300 million that ESPN is paying for one game on Saturday? Go ahead, complain.
Do you like money? Yeah. Right, you want more money? If all this means that we're going to get the big and rich song at the start of college game day, you can realign the conferences however you want.
It's going to be, I'm just sad. I am sad. Especially like Oklahoma, like Bedlam is one of my favorite games every year. Like all that shit, when you lose that, it does, like I love when Texas will lose to Kansas State and that'll be hilarious.
Like that's not going to happen. Like Bedlam, taking the over in Bedlam was one of the annual things you can set your watch to. Actually, this is how much I've missed watching football on television. This morning, I was just watching YouTube compilations of people narrating the wild 2007 NCAA football season.
Yeah. And then they show the Bedlam game and when I say that the sky is darker and still water at night than anywhere else in America, it took my breath away because of how black that sky was. Yes. And I'm going to miss that game.
Yes. So hopefully they keep it for at least a couple more years. It'll be fun to watch them. It's going to be fun to watch Texas and Oklahoma just begrudgingly keep playing the Big 12 for at least a year or two.
All right, before we get to some other stuff, Modal Fabric literally grows from trees, making their undies not only super soft but also sustainable. They offer different cuts because they just get it. We've got different butts. Check out their undie socks, bralettes, loungewear, and more ranging from size extra small to 4XL.
I'm always wearing MeUndies. I love MeUndies. MeUndies is the most comfortable underwear I've ever worn. So MeUndies is also offering a great offer for all of our listeners.
For any first-time purchaser, you get 15% off and free shipping. MeUndies also has their problem-free philosophy if you're not satisfied with any product for any reason. They'll refund or exchange it. No caveats, no questions.
So to get 15% off you missed a flight because of time zones. Now I have a question. Yes. That's not real.
No, it's very real. I think you... So, you know, to be fair to Hank, in his tweet he said, I missed my flight because of alcohol and time zones. I feel like alcohol was doing most of the heavy lifting.
I was thinking about it. It was time zones fault. But you were in Nashville for a weekend. When you look at your phone, it shows you what time the flight is.
Well, this is what happened, Daniel. Okay. Oh, shit. All right, here we go.
All right, Henry. No, I mean, you're right. I 100% should have just maybe checked my phone. But we just have my book of flights on Thursday.
My flight there was at 11 o'clock. My flight home was at 11 o'clock. I thought that was a fun little fact. I was telling my friend, like, oh, 11 and 11.
And then I did not check my phone or look for the confirmation or anything. And then he was driving me there today. He's like, did you check in? I was like, I should do that.
I'm going to check in and I realized it was 11 o'clock Eastern. But 10 o'clock Central. And at the time it was 10 o'clock. So I basically showed up as the plane was boarding.
Okay, but when you buy the flight, it shows you the time in that time zone. No. Yes. I promise you.
No, I promise you. And on your confirmation, it says the time. In my Google Calendar. No, no, no.
Not your Google Calendar. That's what I was going on. Oh, okay. Well, that's different.
Like, the flight, they show it to you. They don't say, like, hey, you've got to figure out your own time zone here. I love Hank's reason is, like, I'm too organized. And I was using my Google Calendar that I use for everything.
But look, I just texted you and screened out. It says, flight's in Newark, 11.15. Right, but when you buy the flight, it says the time. And you get an email.
I bought the flight a long time ago. But even when you saw the flight when you've seen your email. I use Google Calendar. As you see, on that Google Calendar notification, it says 11.15.
So, yeah, it was obviously a mistake in absolute. That's crazy. An absolute nightmare situation. There was, like, a huge storm in Nashville last night.
So, I guess, they canceled a shit ton of flights. So, everything was completely overbooked. They made Hank's flight earlier because of all the cancellations. It was a throwback.
I felt like Billy, to be honest. This is, like, what I used to do when I was 22. I also lost my wallet. I didn't mention that.
Wow. Yeah, no, it was a throwback. Well, I told you, we talked about this beforehand, but, like, there was a moment this afternoon where I was taking care of my two-year-old and my two-month-old and Hank called me and was like, hey, I'm about to miss my flight. And I was like, so I have a 27-year-old, too, that I'm taking care of.
I was like, what is going on right now? But you got it. You got back. Right, so I did tell you guys this.
I did literally, obviously, went out Thursday, Friday, Saturday, a bunch of bars, a bunch of places. The very last bar on Saturday, I fucking left my wallet there. It's, like, a speakeasy that doesn't open until 6 o'clock. They ended up having, so that, like, gave me some relief.
I had a lot of anxiety today. But I had to go through and do the whole, like, I had to take up the SATs. It was crazy. And the guy basically was telling me, he was like, is there a chance I'm not going to do if you answer any questions wrong?
There's nothing we can do. I was like, oh my God. Hank, you should get clear. It's life-changing.
No, I have clear, but you need to... Yeah, John Rossi. Wow. Clear is TSA pre-check on steroids.
TSA pre-check is life-altering. So this is life-altering on steroids. According to him, clear is on top of... It is.
So if we're doing the meme where it's just, like, the small brain, going through security, expanded brain, TSA pre-check, galaxy brain, correct. No, clear is a total, like, clear, I have both, and clear, you just get to cut the TSA pre-check line. So they just need a clear plus where I can cut the clear line. It's that one thing I've noticed about clear is that when you're in line and then the person comes up to you and they're like, hey, you want to skip this line?
We're clear. Everybody immediately says no to them because their, like, salesperson alarm goes off in their head. Like, this person's trying to sell me something. But at the end of the day, you're paying, like, I don't know, $70 a year?
You just say fuck you to the people in TSA pre-check, which is well worth it. No, they have the same energy as the guy at the stadium who's like, hey, sign up for this credit card and you get a free blanket. Oh, but dude, I've actually done that many times. Of course I have.
I signed up for, like, six master cards at Washington football team practicing in the day. So Hank, good job getting back. Wait, what were the questions that they asked you? What state was your social security card issued?
And they asked me to go, give us a landmark in your address. I literally just moved. And the guy told me, like, if you get something wrong, like, there's nothing I can do. I was like, literally froze.
I think they're just asking to answer it without hesitation. Like, he could have answered anything. He wouldn't have, no. My last one was, what was your...
Oh, your last one, not the one before that. No, no, the last question. Oh, okay, I was confused. No, no, no, it was, what's your mom's date of birth?
And I was like, I fucking know. And there was a guy next to him who saved my life and he looked at the other guy and was like, come on, who the fuck knows that? So Hank, you don't have your wallet on here currently? Nope.
Does this mean that the Titans are going to win the Super Bowl? It could. Yeah, the guys' wallet history is coming in on the show. That's true.
But yeah, I do, you know, I vacation so hard that I never want a vacation again. There you go. That's how you vacation. But by the way, you'll be back.
We'll see. The weather's nice. All right, so let's talk a little Water Dogs. They're number one in the league.
Are we still number one in the league? Oh, not. We're basically number one. We're the team that nobody wants to play right now.
I would say the Red Hot Water Dogs. Yes, yes. So it sucks that we can't make fun of them anymore. Jake was on the cock.
He was calling the games on Saturday night and Sunday morning, which was a weather delay related. How'd it go? Give yourself a grade. I'm going to go with B+.
Oh, okay. I like that because you're saying that there's room for improvement. Always room for improvement. I did not notice any noticeable mistakes.
I did see some people saying that your collar was messed up. But that's fake. The collar's perfectly normal. Find a new slander.
What was your mom's review? Come on. Well, yeah, just give it to me. A+.
Okay, all right. So where's your room for improvement? What did you screw up? I need to control my excitement level.
Obviously, it was great. People love that about me. But being winning goals in the fourth quarter shouldn't have the same peak as a goal in the first quarter that makes it 4-2. Yes.
I know that. I kind of disagree when it comes to lacrosse. You should not at any point be underselling a sport of lacrosse. We're trying to bro the game over here, Jake.
So I thought that you had the exciting level that you brought to get your muffs. It was kind of Gus Johnson-like in a good way. I enjoyed it. I'm fine with that.
Did you see the Gus Johnson news? No. Him and Aqib Talib are doing games this year together. What was that accent?
Awesome. That was like your own Jim Piper. Again, my Gus Johnson thing is football only. Football only.
But again, that's a good problem to have, I feel like. Because if you're over-the-top and enthusiastic, then it'd be boring. I would actually say that the Waterdogs looked like they were playing harder for you. That third quarter, that run was awesome.
I stopped watching her. Yes, it was awesome. You were also, I noticed you were very smooth in announcing the two-pointers. Even though it was your first time announcing lacrosse, you were all on top of that.
Sorry, Professor. Syracuse, Fraser players. When they were winding up, you'd be like, here's for a deuce. It was very natural.
And they hit the pipe was great. When it clanks off the pipe, it's pretty good. Half the pipe. Yeah, the first half of the first game.
Also, they should soak the net when it doesn't rain. Oh, yes. It's really cool. Take a boxer in the face.
Yeah, let's just do that when it's hot out. I like that. I like that. Did you swear?
We did a good job. I think everyone, I speak on behalf of the AWLs, I think everyone enjoyed it. You guys were fantastic. I really appreciate it.
Lacrosse still, not my thing. It's exciting. Yeah. I'm not a huge fan of lacrosse.
You know what I am a massive fan of is winning and winners. Right now the dogs are winners. Dude, I love the dogs right now. All of our guys are dogs.
So, congrats to them. Oh, USA! We suck. This is the woodwork.
Okay. One other thing I just want to say, I did tweet that it was sui season earlier when I was down badly and retweeted it, so I don't know what that was about. What is sui? Suicide.
Oh, Jesus. I thought it was... Well, yeah, but it was still like... It was sui season.
I thought it was like some type of... Yeah, sui that retweet. I read it as SUI, like a DUI or BUI voting. You know, I was like, what is he doing?
But okay, sui, sui, sui season. Do you have any issues getting out of Denver given the time zone discrepancy at the airport fine? I was actually... Because I had to change, I was supposed to come back this morning, Sunday morning.
They put me on a red eye tonight. Oh. But during the fourth quarter, the lady who booked the travel, she was like, a seat open up at 2.15 p.m. Fuck yes.
The commitment from the boys to get back. Love it. We made it. It's good to have everyone back.
Thank you to everybody. Same situation, basically. Yeah, same exact. Billy's here, too.
Yeah, Billy's here, too. He did play handball this week. You want to give a quick recap? Video coming out soon?
It was pretty awesome. There it is. There it is. Did anyone watch F1 today?
Williams got points. Williams got points. I think they're still in season one. Lance Stroll got knocked out in the big crash, in the big one.
Oh. I'm pretty sure. Okay. I thought both Williams guys ended up with points.
But I did see that Sebastian Vettel got disqualified after the fact. Yeah, so people think that... I feel like a witch on film. Lance Stroll did not finish.
Oh, he was out. Yeah, no, so there's a rule that you have to have your fuel, you have to have enough fuel at the end of the race to get it tested. He didn't have enough fuel, but it's also one of those rules that's like, it could either... It's a judgment call.
What the conspiracy theorists think is that Vettel was wearing a support of gay pride during the national anthem because Hungary just enacted a law against a very homophobic law. And he said, I don't care. If they want to reprimand me, they can. So that's what they think that might be because.
That sounds like viral marketing for Stillwater coming out. Matt Damon. Just don't talk, dude. His excuse, I love his excuse, which was like, I'm from Boston.
Don't talk. It's a ricochet shot at the entire city. That reminded me of when Paul George gets in front of a mic and is just like, you're sharing too much right now. Stop talking.
All right, so back to Sebastian Vettel because I'm trying to understand. It seems to me that in motorsports, if you time out your labs exactly perfectly where you run out of fuel at the very end, that's usually a good thing, right? Yeah. But it was just not even enough.
It's like a leader, I think they need. It's like when they ask for a piss test. Right. If you're getting drug tests, you're like, I can't give it up.
And it only covers the bottom. Right. So what are they saying? You could put something in your fuel?
I don't know. I don't know. That one is my pay grade. It feels like a witch hunt.
Yeah, it feels like a witch hunt. It feels like that shirt is what did him in. All right. Should we do Who's Back?
Who's Back is brought to you by our friends at the Cash App. The Cash App is always back. Buying Bitcoin is back. Playing Stock Market is back.
Cash App has all of it. You can buy Bitcoin on the Cash App super, super easily. Just one click of a button. It also...
so links directly to your bank account. So go check out the Cash App. Download the Cash App and enter the referral code. Barstool, you'll receive $10 for free and $10 to ASPCA when you download the Cash App from the App Store or Google Play Store.
Today, the Cash App is the best app in the world. The Cash App. Okay, Hank, all your who's backs have been taken, but give us your best shot. Hasboula, Snoop Dogg, and 2017 Celtics are apparently going to be back.
I thought I was getting tricked or I thought someone retweeted an old tweet on my timeline. It was from NBA Central, which I wasn't sure if it was confirmed or not, but it was. Jeff Green is reportedly a primary target for the Celtics. Boston could also show interest in Kelly Olenek and Avery Bradley.
Oh, wow. Brad Stevens is just running it back from the coach, I guess. Yeah, I would say getting Jeff Green back is a good sign, right? Because it's like him and Jake Router are always in the playoffs.
Yeah. I guess, yeah. I mean, he's like a dinosaur at this point. He wasn't even, you know...
I am a little jealous of you that you like time traveled this weekend. Yeah. Because you walked in and you're like, we got a lot of NBA. Like, Westbrook was like, yeah, that was Friday's show.
But it was like, I'm jealous of you. Nothing like just time traveling with your brain. Yeah, yeah. All right, PFC, who's here, who's back?
Well, Hank took all mine. So, Chinese Taipei is back. Oh. We hear about Chinese Taipei once every four years during the Olympics because China has the Olympic Committee, the IOC, and by proxy, all the broadcast partners buy the balls.
And so they're not allowed to say Taiwan on the broadcast because if you call the country Taiwan, it implies that it's a country and not property of the People's Republic of China. It's one of the fascinating little, like, this league's going back and forth is China claims Taiwan. So they call it Chinese Taipei like it's a district. Taiwan claims that they own China and Taiwan calls themselves the Republic of China.
I like that. And so it's always like which way are they going to go? But since it's the Olympic Committee and it's NBC, they're referring to it as Chinese Taipei, which isn't really a country, but it's always nice to see that pop up. It's like when ESPN drew the seven dotted line around the South China Sea for the games that were over there and just gave them property of all this water.
That's essentially what NBC is doing, like weighing into foreign relations. I like it. I like it. Yeah, the different, I mean, I still keep seeing like the ROC is just with no flag.
It's always funny. Rock Nation. My who's back is Rowdy Gaines because we get reminded every four years the best announcer in all sports, Rowdy Gaines for swimming, who just, is there a difference between him and Scott Hamilton? They're the same guy, right?
Yeah, same guy. Yeah, one does figure skating, one does swimming. Yeah, but he's awesome. He's electric.
And Caleb Dressel, who has the coolest tattoos, really he's just hot and has an awesome body. But swimming, what? The Olympic tattoo? No, he's got like an eagle and it's like a whole, and a gator, his whole sleeve is sick.
How do you feel about the Olympic tattoo? I mean, that's just everyone gets it. That's so chuggy. I actually kind of, I want to get an Olympic tattoo and then people just, actually no, you see me, they're like, no, just in hell, this guy was an Olympic tattoo.
Yeah, it's so chuggy to get the Olympic tattoo if you're an Olympian. But yeah, Rowdy Gaines, and then, as you know, this is a fun fact that we've got to start flexing on people, the US has never lost the 100 meter medley. 15 in a row. Dominated.