The Defensive Man: Why 'Being Right' Is Costing You Your Relationships

In the spirit of our growth as men, in this episode, I wanted to talk about some of the things that I’ve learned and also a theme that I’ve been hearing from different people in the latest chapter of my life. I started reflecting on my own life and how at different times I’ve reacted the same way.  There have definitely been times in my life when people who cared about me were wanting to give me feedback for my own good and I shut down.  Some younger part of me that wanted to be seen as perfect, or solid, or accomplished.  Anything but needing improvement. As men, we’re programmed to want to provide, to achieve and so much of our culture measures how well we do financially and have we succeeded in the eyes of our neighbors - our houses, our cars, the kinds of schools our kids go to - you name it.How do we create a space within ourselves to allow the space for others to express themselves about how they are feeling?  And maybe even how they are feeling about us?  This is so important for our romantic relationships and for those of us with female partners, it’s even more important - they’re so wired to want to express themselves and they do in their female relationships with regularity.