Hello, welcome to Armchair Expert. I'm Dan Rather, and this is Manica Lily Padman. Lily Pad. I just cheated everyone because I didn't remember Monica's middle name Lily seconds ago, and then I blundered in the introduction.
We had to reset now and cheating and acting like I remembered it. Yeah, how dare you? What a scumbag. What a scummy scumbag.
Ooh, scummy, a scumbag. Are you going in the bad place? I do speaking of the bad place in the good place and good place, good place week. We have Darcy, Cardin on everyone's favorite robot, Janet.
Yeah. Very compelling robot. Very almost human-like. Not since small wonder, do I think I've liked the robot so much.
Does that name of the show that had a girl robot? I've never heard of that. I barely know. I don't know why you would know.
Wall-y. 40 years older than you. Yeah, Wall-y. Or when I was a kid's short circuit, Johnny Five, very likable robot.
Johnny Five is a lot. On Friends, there's a robot for a few episodes. Mack and I'm sorry, his name is Cheese. And he's a robot that Joey plays opposite, and the show is called Mack and Cheese.
What have you said in the show? It's called Friends. Well, at any rate, enough about Friends. We're talking about the good places, good place week.
We're coming hot on the heels of of of grandpa Ted. That's right. We call them that loving things like our children calling grandpa Ted. That's right.
Pup-a-ted. But today we have Darcy. She is spectacular on the show. She's spectacular in real life.
I hope you enjoyed this ray of sunshine, Darcy Cardin. This podcast is brought to you by Squarespace. I feel like Spring always does this thing where you realize you've been thinking about something for a long time, and suddenly it feels like, okay, maybe I actually do something with it. Totally.
It's less pressure, but more like readiness. Yeah. Like you've been sitting on an idea or a project or even just a perspective you care about. And now you're like, maybe this deserves to exist somewhere outside of my own head.
And maybe mental health awareness month. There's already this broader conversation happening. People are more open, more curious, more willing to engage, which is where something like Squarespace comes in. It makes that jump from idea to actual thing feel way less overwhelming.
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Head to squarespace.com slash Dax for a free trial. And when you're ready to launch, use offer code Dax to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. We are supported by Airbnb. If you've ever traveled kids or with extended family, you know how much difference a little extra space can make.
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Some trips really do feel better when you have the right space. Darcy, welcome. I'm Tom Chirksburg. You just walked in.
First of all, first guest ever to just figure out how to get into the attic without us like getting into traffic and flagging down a car. I was I was proud of myself as I was doing it, but also scared. Very case I had to walk up some stairs that had some spider webs on them. Well, hold on.
Yeah. Don't call us out on this. Competence is sexy. For me, it might be one of my primary turn on competence.
Yeah. Confidence and confidence. Yeah. The two C's.
The two C's. The C squared. Yeah. C squared.
Wait, how am I doing? Am I close enough? Can you hear me? I can't hear a thing.
I can't think. You're reading my list. Rob, though, is transcribing it. So in the event that your audio is no good.
We can just read your. It's a service we provide. You guys are good at this. Thank you so much.
We're still learning. I'm a fan. You know that, right? Well, I never know.
Let's just say that when you see people socially and I'm like, Hey, love the podcast. What else are you going to say? It's like the only thing I had going on in my life. That is not true, but cool.
But I mean, it is like, it's something that you're doing it. It would be held anyone out on it. No, I have no. No, I have a funny story about that one second.
So when I was on pong and I in the show was popular enough that I got to start taking general meetings around town, I would say at least 80% of the meetings the people would say, and there's generally just white dudes and they'd be like, Oh, I love the show punk. Didn't you? Did you tear your balls down? Like 70% of the time they thought I was on jazz.
Yeah. They had really no awareness of it. Did you have to just let them down gently? It just was a disillusioning.
I was like, Oh, okay, this is how this town works. There is this until them. You must this show is relevant somehow. You have to meet with this guy.
And then of course they say they saw it. Love the show. Yes. Literally love the show.
And then didn't you write a bull backwards or something? And I'm like, Oh, okay. Let me who's that torn ball set? Hey, I don't want to get weird, but would you mind popping out that torn ball set that's a grotto?
But so because I think maybe because that was my initial foray and everything I pretty much discount anything anyone says. Right. But for real, I'm a fan. My sister's an endless and every episode.
Wait, as a team? No, although one time we did my little sister and I listened to the set, Rogan up said together. How many sisters do you have? 17.
Oh my God. That's average. I have two sisters. I have to.
I have to. I'm to. Lainey and Miranda who are listening now. Oh my God.
Oh, shout out. Hi, Lainey. Hi, Miranda. We show me photographs of them and then I will say hi, Lainey.
Hi, Miranda. Hi, Miranda. What beautiful names Lainey Miranda and Darcy. Yeah.
And we have brother Will William. Oh, he just got the norm pedestrian. Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah. Beautiful. Normal name. We also call Miranda Mimo Mimo as an adult to this day.
Mimo. Is she pursuing acting? She's not nobody else in my family is is pursuing acting. Is she pursuing?
Is pursuing of this dumb thing? She is she just graduated coding school. Oh, that's great. Opposite basically if you're in never.
Yeah, totally. She's a computer programmer. She's cool. So what is her goal?
I don't know. To save the world. We need coders. Yeah.
I mean, I only. Okay. Yeah. Okay.
Because are you like, what is it exactly? No, no, I think I raised with the other nations. Oh, okay. I just wanted to hear why Monica was so certain that that was something we needed because more computer stuff.
It just counterintuitive to me to hear you say that we need more computer stuff. Right. I would thought like we need more paintings or dance. No, I don't care about that.
Okay. More orgies. I don't care about that. Do you know what she wants to ultimately?
She wants to write a program that will eradicate. Keep going. She's um, this is sort of new for her. It's a new career path where she sort of discovered it recently where she was asking a friend what coding even was.
And when they described it, she was like, huh, that makes sense to me. And then she watched some YouTube tutorials and it totally clicked. Oh, and then she like signed up for class immediately and like graduated the top of her damn class. How long does that take?
Because the way you're telling the story, I'm like, was this a two week endeavor? I think it's like three months or four months. Oh, really? Yeah, it was quick.
And she can fully write software now. Oh, she's like a little dolphin in the water. She's like a little dolphin in the water. Oh my God.
One. One in zero's water. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I wish I had it.
She's like my best friend and I don't know how to explain. You know, like sure. My siblings and I are super close and I mean, don't ask me to describe their jobs. Ask me to describe their hearts.
Well, that was my second question. Could you describe your sister's hearts to me? What's the age difference? Um, Laney is 16 months older than me.
Maybe 18. Oh, wow. Your mom and dad really went out of that. Yeah, let's talk about that.
Yeah, let's talk about their coitus. And then my brother's three years younger than me and then Miranda. Mimo is nine years younger than me. Oh, and you guys are close.
As close as can be. It almost, it doesn't even make sense. That makes me feel guilty. Well, I would imagine it was triggering.
I was gonna let you take that. Yeah, because a lot of times you can just chalk that age gap up to like, well, it's like an ant or like, you know, you didn't, you never were really in the same house at the same time. I mean, guess you were we just we were we were close since she was a baby. Was it would you say it started at least or still is that maternal kind of relief?
Yeah, she was mine. Yeah. And my older sister Laney, I think would describe it the same way, but we felt like this is our baby. Yeah, we will protect and raise her.
And instill in her values that will one day result in coding. Yeah, which I can't explain. Were your mom and dad busy? They were.
I mean, busy with four kids in bed. Monica, sorry. I'm out of here. Sorry.
Sorry. Where are you from? I'm from the Bay Area. We shot the pilot of parenthood in Marin and not the show.
It was at Universal, but the house that was our parents house on the show, the house they rented for the shoot, these people had seven or eight fully mature redwoods in their yard, which just seemed impossible. Like no one can have a redwood tree in their yard, like a thousand years. You did it. Was it a thousand years old?
I don't know. Did it predate Christ? Some of those trees predate Christ. It may have predated Christ.
But wait, I'm like, it was PDC trees for sale. You know, Monica does fact checks at the end. Can you fact check me too? You need to give her your mission.
I think we had three redwoods in our. Oh my God, it's totally off topic. You've ever been flipping through the channels and stumbled upon one of those lumberjack contests like Kanye has been holy smokes. Yeah.
What are those guys doing? Have you seen one one again? Never. One of the one of the contests is or the events is is cutting like a basically a redwood or a sequo.
You just a huge tree. You have to cut off chunks of it, right? These guys have chainsaws that have boat engines on them. And watching them operate them is the most terrifying thing in the world.
And they will cut through this tree like nine times in 20 seconds. And it's, I imagined so much harder than it even looks. Absolutely. Right.
I've never tried to cut a tree. With a chainsaw. Right. Or anything.
Not even an axe. But I think it's really, really super hard. So I hear we're on the street. It's hard to do.
My husband just did that. He did. I'm just gonna wait for you. He's such a babe.
He's really, really I don't want to say shockingly good looking as if you shouldn't have gotten it. But just like when you see that he takes your breath away a little bit. Actually, it's funny that you say that because when I met him, my thought was this guy is too good looking to even be my friend. Oh, wow.
That's so sweet. And I'm fine. I'm beautiful. I'm normal.
You're built like a brick ship. No. Don't ever say that. That's actually great.
I love that. I like that. You probably wouldn't have heard that. But we had this.
That's a compliment to me. Me too. Okay. I described this friend.
We have in common as her being built like a brick ship. I was like, that is the most offensive compliment. It probably is. But I mean, it's like, yeah.
People agreed with me. Yeah. No, I think you're probably right. I'm like, there's something about that where I'm like, that's all I got.
So I'll take it. Where did you first lock eyes with them? We literally locked eyes at Disneyland weirdly enough. We were there with mutual friends.
And I mean, I guess I was about to say long story short. There's not much of a story to it. He was he was LA friends with these people and I was like childhood friends with these people. So I was going to snooly with them.
And so I met him at Disneyland and I only knew this, my mutual friend. He had like his whole group of friends there. So I was a little bit of like, I'm in and out. And he was really nice to me.
That's a great place to meet someone because you're going to be together for like eight hours and you're going to be standing in line. So it's like, all these excuses are just me shooting the shit. Right? Definitely.
And we even had a moment that I totally remember where we were, we had to sit next to each other on a ride. Oh, yeah. Oh my God. Which was like a little sweet.
Yeah. It was a little sweet. You're at Disneyland. Oh, yeah.
Yeah. And you guys, do you guys kind of, and you keep ending up maybe next to each other line? Yeah. Do you remember what some of the topics you guys were bonding over?
I do. I mean, no, it's funny. It feels so long ago. And also, I wasn't clocking him as like, my future boyfriend.
I truly was like, I can't believe this guy's even giving me the time of day. Oh, okay. I'm like a big, weird, like, but I mean, a little church. Sure.
Sure. Yeah. Yeah. And I also, I'm fine.
I like myself, but I was like, this guy's not going to be, this I'm not hit. I'm not for him. Okay. Yeah.
Listen, I felt that way many times. But you have, you have the gift of Gavin, you're really funny. So really, this guy's the limit. Right.
Yeah. He does, he recalls like a sort of loud burp that I did, which to me now, I'm like, Jesus Christ, but I'm sure at the time I was being just charming as hell. But he remembers being like, this girl's funny. Yeah.
He recalls that I was funny. Again, that goes back to your confidence thing. So if you let out a big belt, were you getting into some of the fun or food over at Disneyland? She's on a stick.
Weird, like a corn dog. A corn dog. Disneyland is not to be missed. It's beautiful.
Yeah. It's a beautiful snack. Yeah. And had you consumed a few corn dogs?
I may have. I know probably not a few. I guess what I'm, let me just cut to the chase. Did you force his burp out or was it inevitable?
I wouldn't have been an accident. It would not have been an accident. Okay. Right.
You made a choice. Sometimes it's fun to like push one out for comic effect. You can do that on demand. You can.
Yeah. Oh, I'm so jealous. Will you pop one out, right? Oh, please.
I mean, like, no. Can you imagine like driving in your car right now, we're like running on the treadmill and all of a sudden like a big loud like Simpsons burp comes in here. I can imagine that because I was doing the O'Reilly theme song and I changed it to maybe the singer was clearing their throat as part of the O'Reilly. What do you want?
O'Reilly. O'Reilly. What's the song? They catch it up.
And I couldn't stop doing it. O'Reilly. Ooh. Yours is great.
It really makes sense when you do it one more time. I really hope somehow the folks that O'Reilly will get word of this and just try one. Even if it's like in a small market. I just think it's a call.
It could be really viral. What is it? Oh, so I'm clearing their throat. Oh, I recognize this.
I haven't even I just try and remember to get a distributor. This is some free press for them right now. They are so lucky. All right.
But but but but like a British shit house. Oh my God. Thank you so much. It is meant for men.
Do you think that what's that? Yeah, it definitely is. It's really what does it mean? I mean, I know what it means.
But if we sort of break it down, built like a brick. Okay. A brick house, right? No house.
Why? Shoe house. An outhouse. Yeah.
So I was just explaining it to Monica. Really? What it does is it's plain heavily on the the three little pigs. So you had a straw house, a wood house and a brick house.
The best the most well-built house. And so and then traditionally Porto, you know, shithouses, outhouses, we're just really flimsy. Lean to a few pieces of wood. Yeah, you just point it to my future house.
Yeah. No, there is a portable, a portable party out there. Yeah. So I just think it's, you know, like anyone who would take the time to build a brick.
Yeah, it's just a very well-built premium construction. You're not just like breaking up with somebody and just being like, you're built like a straw shit house. No, that's just funny. It is interesting, because I do bet if you went on like on Jay Leno on the streets, right?
We went to Universal City Walk and just started asking people, would you rather be described as a straw shit house or a brick house? There'd probably be no uniformity. Yeah. You think people would?
You'd want straw. And tell me why. Because there's also something about the combination between brick and shit in one. Yes.
It's like like a big shit. Like a big old shit. A brick of shit. Yeah.
Shooting a brick. Shooting a brick. Shooting a brick. Wait a second.
Yeah. So then it's like you're a big piece of shit. Okay. Well, hold on.
No one looks like a piece of shit. But I guess what I'm asking is do you think by chance that because there's mortar involved in bricks in between the bricks, that you're thinking somehow that's shit and that in a straw construction, there's no even place for shit. I mean, it would be great with straw, right? It would hold it together.
Actually, shit would be better with straw than brick. Well, and often you'll pee in a cow pasture and you'll see their extra man. They're dumb. They're scat.
And it'll have to say straw. Yeah. Like it was not digested properly. I think when, I mean, I know this is so goofy because we're talking about when Dax said that I built like a brick shit house and we're still talking about it.
But it is a thing where I like it isn't I think being like an athletic child and being a tall woman and not being built of straw. So for me personally, I have really decided that it's okay to not be built like straw. Yeah. Yeah.
You know, where maybe I had like issues with it when I was younger now, I'm like, I am what I am. Yeah. I am what I am. I am what I am.
Exactly. However, everyone should write maybe takes a while to get to your own whatever it is, whatever whatever piggy's house you want you are built like I want to go back to Disneyland. You had you had pounded a few corn dogs, maybe some soda. There's bubbles.
You choose to embrace this burp that you let out and your future mate, he digs it because it is a display of confidence because it's a lot of what you know what all people be afraid to burp in front of someone they like. Right. Right. So it's a real display.
I think you're right. You found out your peacock feathers. Yeah. And do you think that was one of the moments for him that he clicked in like?
Weirdly, I do. I think he if he was here right now, he would probably say like that wasn't the type of girl he was hanging out with. You know what I mean? He was hanging out with like some real hot LA girls that probably weren't doing a lot for his like brain his brain right right his upper brain.
His upper brain. His upper brain. A lot of his nor is nor is nor is nor is nor is nor is nor is nor is nor is brain. Oh my god.
The Lord brings me. The good things. But yeah. So I think he was I think his thought that day was kind of like, who is this weirdo?
I like this weirdo. Which he would which he still does like I advise men and women to take those swings because even if they backfire you basically just weed it out a good chunk of people you don't really want to be. I totally agree. I totally agree.
I to in there's you know with dating and with like what do I hide from him or her and when do I tell them this weird thing about me? It's like get to it. Yes. Let's not do the slow.
Yes. Do you think and this is now more of a hard certain question that had you two did he might have asked you to marry him out of spot because that would be the ultimate swing. Well, here's here. Okay.
Here's a weird thing. Okay. I can talk about this on the show before. I think you have Jason and I don't fart in front of each other.
Oh my goodness. How do you exist? Are you constantly leaving the room and going in the backyard? I honestly don't think either of us are big tutors in general.
Lucky you. I mean, I'd say we don't. You have a specific diet I don't know about? Yeah.
No, we don't. We just learned you we corn dogs on a cake when they're cajun calls for it. Yeah. Yeah.
We don't. We're not. I don't know why. We we are a normal healthy couple.
We key in front of each other. We go poop in front of each other. We go poop in front of each other. But maybe I don't poop in front of anyone ever.
Okay. Okay. All right. Yeah.
Absolutely. Yeah. I would say I would say if I really if someone charted it and we had a ratio of how much time Chris and I are spent talking. Yeah.
Because she's out. She's busy during the day. I'm going to get the kids right. So the actual one I want chatting time is I bet it's in the 15% of either she's on the can or I'm on the can.
Okay. What? Okay. Let's let's.
She she pooped in front of me within I'd say the first eight weeks of dating. I'm a sewing lover. And by the way, I'm like I'm a very innately codependent person. So there's that would be a deal breaker.
The thing you guys got going. It would be like you're definitely uncomfortable. I can't accept that I'm somehow making you uncomfortable. You're gonna have to fart and you're gonna have to poop.
Let's just do this. We also we don't hide the poop right. We're not. We don't know.
We don't know. We just play the poop. Right. But we're not like I need some alone time.
You know, it's like I'm going to poop right now. Okay. And then I close the door. Okay.
Any of your preference that he probably doesn't go in there for some period of time afterwards. He doesn't care. I this is a weird thing. He's like, we don't care, but we still do this.
Again, this keeps coming back to Stern and I wish it weren't. But he's a big proponent of never pooping from each other. He thinks it's a great way to keep things sexy. I don't require something to keep it sexy.
Like I'm horny and that's bad. Like I don't think if she she could poop in the kitchen floor, I'd be bombed. But it's still be horny. Yeah.
You have better while you're cleaning that. Yeah. For some reason. What?
Yes. But also in the very early stages of dating, we went away to do this movie together. We both got the worst food. I wasn't flu poisoning.
Some kind of flu. Right. We were in the sharing department. We're like six weeks in a dating.
She needed my assistance at times. And like, once that event happened, like, forget it. Yeah. It's a weird thing.
I really I can't like emphasize this enough. We don't care. If he did, I would laugh. Sure.
If I did, he would laugh. But we just it's like a bridge that I don't know. We've been together for over a decade. Over a decade.
And if you not had to care for one another during some flu symptoms. But not like a diarrhea situation. Okay. That person just they get private with that.
I guess. Okay. Good. And that's great.
I don't think there's a right or a wrong answer. I'm sure people think what we're doing is wrong. Yeah. We in our group of friends, we've talked about this part of this part of this part of this part of this part of this.
I just can't imagine. You must. But here's my other again. I'm going to project.
Yeah. Maybe you don't fart. And maybe that that's true for you. You would know how free.
Do you think you could put a number on it per day? Could you put a number on yours today? I would say it's in the 20s. Great.
Yeah. I'm sure I'm I'm a normal amount. Okay. But I'm not like pump an amount.
Okay. You're not a far factory. Okay. But there's no way to know that your husband's not right.
He's telling you this. But I find it very it just doesn't give me as a little suspicious. But he doesn't have but he doesn't have a reason to like lie because I'm not like do not fart in or he doesn't really isn't like that. I think I do think since we've had a dog, it's like made it easier to sneak him out.
Okay. All right. Okay. Well, don't be talking.
Okay. Let's go back to the Bay Area. The city by the bay somewhere around Oakland. Yeah.
Might be north or south. East East Bay. So I grew up in a town called Danville, which is like it's one of Creek Danville, Oohwafia area. And was there an industry there?
Did your folks do something that specifically required you living in? Yeah. Well, my dad and mom started. This is pretty cool.
Okay. Right for this cool shit. My mom got started this music magazine in the 70s. Really?
Yes. Called BAM, which is it for Bay Area music. Oh, sure. And so it was in the 60s and 70s, like the Bay Area music scene and 80s and 90s.
Very music scene is like very cool. And so they started this magazine and it did really well. It was like, you know, that was our whole deal. That's how we lived.
It was the hours long, like what's the life of someone running a publication? I mean, was mom or dad the editor? Were they co-editors? Dad was.
Mom was like, mom was raising four kids and also like, she was like the, I wouldn't say like the brains behind, but you know, she was very involved, but still kind of at home and kind of at work. Flexible. Yeah. And once once she had four kids, it was like a lot of a lot of a lot of home.
And if you're a magazine covering music, I assumed then they have to go to concerts late at night. Like it's a yeah, which was great because they took us. So we were going to concerts from, I think my first concert, I was like five. And what kind of music was this magazine covering?
I understand Bay Area, but specifically like the punk scene or the like a lot of rock and roll. Okay. And then also like into the 90s, it was like hip hop and round two. And you know, like a cover would be like Kiwi Lewis in the 80s or like Journey or something or like, or I mean, I was, or you know, like in the sort of 90s grungy area, it was a lot of like, Nirvana, mud, honey.
Yeah. Okay. From Nirvana to mud, honey, the range dacks. I discovered Nirvana through going to a mud honey concert.
Is that true? Yes. They played smells like teen spirits over, like what waiting for the show to begin? And we were like, what is that song?
Don't you remember that feeling? Oh, probably more than any other song. Me too. Where were you?
I was at my friend Lauren Lehigh's house and I Lauren Lehigh of L. A. H.I.V. Oh, wow.
The hive. I guess. Okay. And, and a girl I haven't spoken to since high school, but so big shout out to Lauren Lehigh.
And I heard the song and I loved it and it rocked my world and I could only picture like poison or, or, or, or, yeah, pictured huge hair and like spandex and like ripped night, you know, they're like, yeah, poison, I guess is what I'm thinking. Yeah. In the tassels hanging out in the shirts, right? So when I saw what they looked like, I didn't, I mean, they delivered right visually.
My life changed. It is suspicious and maybe it's not suspicious, but most of those like Pearl Jam, those guys were looking sound guard and they were fucking looking at Nirvana. This is good. Like what are the odds that you're you're, you can sing like Chris Cornell and you look like Chris Cornell.
I don't know. It's kind of like Jordan being so good. Right. It's suspicious.
Right. And then you think of all the people that are not good looking at him. Maybe that talented that just don't get the answer. Is that what is happening?
I mean, I'm sure there's some like, Uggo dude out there who can sing like, oh, they're fucking yeah that we just don't get the chance. Well, and I brought this up and this is not to say it's ugly, but it is to say that they wouldn't let him be on his album covers. And that was Christopher Cross and the 80s sailing. And maybe I need to see a picture of him because I think he didn't have the care.
Yeah. That's my way of saying I think he was well, man. Yeah. And they just, they kept him off his album covers, which is beautiful voice.
Yes. And people, I think the women, again, I'm making some huge assumptions here, but I have to imagine women likes Christopher Cross a little more than men, even if men liked it, they probably publicly weren't saying they loved it. Right. Because it's like a little song.
I loved Whitney Houston, but in high school, I wasn't advertising that to any of my bros. Right. I wish you did. Well, truth but totally early on, I'm a best friend.
We're driving down the road and it was around Christmas time and fucking and I came on the radio. And it was literally that scene out of Tommy Boy where like, I didn't turn it and he didn't say turn it. And then about mid song, I just go to him fucking love this song. He goes, Oh my God, my sister got this tape for Christmas and I've been listening to it when she leaves.
Yes, it was great. Okay. So anyways, yes, these guys were gorgeous. Yeah.
You heard the song. Oh, yeah. And it did change my life. I would say that my like, my identity as a junior hire was like very wrapped up in like alternative music.
I wouldn't have guessed that about you. This is a fun discovery. Yeah. I was so deeply, deeply obsessed with Pearl Jam and Eddie Benton.
You were so hardcore. Yeah, there was, there was a ton of great music and also like, did you collect records? Did you have band T shirts? Was this your full identity?
It was also wrapped up in my parents because we, you know, they, we were very involved in their work, I guess. So we would go to concerts with them. My dad would get like a box of free tape CDs records like every, you know, month before they came out. Yeah, it would say promotional.
I had like a lot of pride in what they did. Sure. Yeah. That's a really unique thing for, for, for, to have parents that are in the music industry and some capacities.