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You'll never miss an episode that way. Let me tell you one thing I've noticed about all the max out performers that I've interviewed on my program that I've known throughout my life for the last 30 years really in business, sports, entertainment, politics, you name it. The elite performers look at time and use time completely differently than the people who perform at an average level. And so I want to talk to you about some tips and strategies today to begin to think about time and utilize time differently.
So let's start out. The first thing I want to tell you about people who win, who max out, they are in a much bigger hurry than the people who are average. And I'm not kidding you when I say this. They're in a bigger hurry to get to their destination, to get to their outcome.
Their pace is faster. They walk faster. They talk faster. And their expectation when they're going to arrive at their destination is sooner.
This may seem like a very small, subtle thing, but I want you to evaluate. How big of a hurry are you in? Because there's something to be said about how close you think you are to a goal and how fast you will run to get to the finish line. Let me give an example of that.
If you and I started out right now and we had a 26-mile marathon to run, right? In our minds, it was 26 miles. We were going to race each other. We would pace ourselves at a certain speed in order to maintain that speed because of the duration of the run.
So if it was a marathon, we'd jog, wouldn't we, pretty slow? You certainly wouldn't sprint 26 miles. And so because of the destination, because the finish line is so far away, our pace or our hurry is limited based on how far away we think we are or when we'll arrive there. But if you and I were to run a 100-yard dash, would the pace be the same?
Because the finish line is so much closer, we'd run full speed from the minute we took off, wouldn't we? Because of the proximity of how close the finish line is. The people that win in life don't necessarily have more vision than you. See, it's not a lack of vision always that means that you're going to lose.
It's a lack of a type of vision, which is depth perception. You think you're further away from the outcome, and so you pace yourself like it, and you jog all the time throughout your life. The people that win may have a bigger vision, but they have accurate depth perception. They understand how close their goals are, how close their outcome is, and they're constantly in a sprint to get there throughout their day.
That means, consequently, they get started earlier, and they finish later. They get up earlier. Throughout the day, they're in a bigger hurry to get to the places they need to be, because the finish line in their mind is so much closer. I cannot emphasize this enough to you.
It's just the pace and the way time shrinks for elite performers compared to the average. I'm telling you, the average performer can say the same things, read the same books, have the same schedule, yet the person who is in a bigger hurry throughout the day ends up winning the day, winning the week, winning the month, winning the year, and winning the life. And so please evaluate your pace. You should be in a so much bigger hurry that everybody around you, you almost have people telling you to slow down a little bit.
So that's number one, is you've got to be in a bigger hurry. The second thing is the way we begin our day. I'm going to tell you right now, either you're going to control your time, or your time's going to control you. Either you are going to dictate the terms of your life, or you're going to be someone who reacts and responds throughout their life.
This device right here can both speed up time in your life, or it can slow it down. It's not always a speed tool. So one of the tips that I've covered before, but not enough people implement that I promise you is a quality of maxed out performance that relates to their time, is they control it. They do not react and respond.
They dictate the terms of their life most of the time. And that means this, when you wake up in the morning, the greatest thing you could do for yourself is not touch or look at this device for 30 minutes to an hour after awakening. So that when you wake up, you take control of your time. You control the time.
You control the beginning of the day. You get clear. You meditate. You pray.
You stretch. You think. You go through a gratitude exercise. You control that first 30 minutes of your day.
It sets a tone that I'm in charge of my time, not what enters this. If the first thing you do is grab this, this now dictates the term of your day. This controls my day. What hits this?
What email? What text? What call? It hits this.
What Instagram post hit this? This controls me. It controls my time. But if you can stay away from it for the first 30 minutes to an hour, you send a message to your brain, to yourself, that you control time, that this day is on your terms.
And again, you stack up a day, a week, a month, a year, five years of a lifetime of you controlling and dictating the terms of your life for just the first 30 minutes to an hour every day. It will revolutionize your life. It'll be very difficult to do for the first 30 days. But after 30 days, you'll never have a desire to do it again.
You'll completely flip your life around. I'm not suggesting that all max outperformers dictate every turn. Of course I respond. Of course I react throughout my day.
It's not the syntax or context of my day. I control my day. There are things throughout every day where we react and respond. There are conversations where someone says something to us.
We clearly react and respond. But I'm the assessor of my life, not the assessor. I assess my life. I dictate the terms of my life.
I'm not being assessed. I'm not being dictated to by other people all the time in my life. That's a huge separator in how people look at time for max outperformers. The third thing is this.
Why is a day only 24 hours? I mean, if the average people in the world or the majority of people in the world have a 24-hour day, why does it have to apply to you? Many years ago, I discovered if you've ever had a day where in four or five hours, you got more in the first four or five hours done or accomplished in your day than you had in a normal day. You ever have a four or five hour window, a six hour window?
I've got so much done in these six hours. It's more than I get done in an average day. And what I found out was max out elite performers, people that perform at the highest level, they get more done in a six hour window than most people get done in a day. And here's why.
Most people measure a day by 24 hours. So I started to think, I was young in business. I was in my early 20s. And one of the things that was held against me by other people was you're too young to win.
You don't have enough experience. You just don't have enough days of experience. You don't have enough days in business to win. I thought, well, how can I fix that?
And here's how you can fix that. And I've adopted this now for almost 30 years. I want the average people I compete against to think they have a 24-hour day. My days are six days long.
So I want to teach you the concept of running mini days. My day, my first day is from 6 a.m. to noon every day. That's a full day for me.
So I try to get done a full day's work from 6 a.m. to noon because I no longer have a 24-hour day in my life. I have a six-hour day. And so a day to me is that measure of time.
It altered the complete direction of my life. It transformed who I am. So now from 6 a.m. to noon is a day.
That's my first day. Every single week, 6 a.m. to noon, Monday morning. And what happens in that 6 a.m.
to noon, see, there's a mental thing we have. I have a whole day to get all these things done. And so we stack and dictate and schedule our day over that 24-hour window of time. You'd be surprised if you shrunk the day to six hours.
You get the same things done in those six hours you used to get done in 24. From noon to 6 p.m. is my second day. And in that second day, I fill that up with a full day's work of fun, memories, meetings, phone calls, you name it, meetings with my relationships in my life.
In that six-hour day, I pack out another day. From noon to 6 p.m., I fill that day up. And my third day is 6 p.m. to midnight.
And in that 6 p.m. to midnight, same thing. My relationships, my meetings, my phone calls, my emails, the work I do is a third day. And so what happened was when I was in my early 20s, I went from having three days over a week, a month, a year.
In just one year, I end up with over 1,000 days and I'm competing against people who only have 365. Think about the mind-blowing difference it could be in your life if you ran many days the rest of your life. I'm telling you right now that my days are six hours long. The amount of work you can get done, the amount of compounding that will take place in your life, it's going to blow your mind.
When you start looking at your schedule, day one is 6 a.m. to noon. Day two is noon to 6 p.m. Day three is 6 p.m.
to midnight. Your whole existence is going to change. It'll be kind of fun in the beginning. You'll mess it up.
Imagine that in one month getting 90 days. Think about what would happen in your life if in a month you had 90 days and the rest of the world, the average in your life, imagine that for a second. The rest of the world only had 30. And you stack that up over a year or three years.
How different would your life be? I'm telling you, I'm an example of how different your life would be. I'm an example of what that productivity and compounding in your life can look like. More fun, more memories, more meetings, more encounters, more relationships, more experiences, more money, more achievement, more joy, more bliss.
I'm creating opportunities constantly. So what I do is I shrink the finish line so there's sprints all the time. And so because I don't have a six-hour day, I'm going to hurry throughout that day. I'm not jogging.
I'm not walking. I'm in a big hurry. And you're going to be amazed at the transformation. You're like, I may never give you a bigger gift than the concept of six-hour days.
I think I'm one of the only people you'll ever hear explain this to you. But I can tell you, I started to study these successful mentors. My gosh, I get so much done before 9 o'clock in the morning. My gosh, by 1 o'clock, they've accomplished so much.
And the average person's just stretching, getting out of bed, done their first appointment or two. Especially you entrepreneurs out there, how critical this is. Because when you're an employee, at least as an employee, to some extent, they control your time. They dictate.
You need to be here at 9 a.m. You can't leave until 5 p.m. And so although that's a nuisance, it helps you be more productive because they're paying you. They tell you when to be there.
But what happens for most entrepreneurs, they don't realize. When you become an entrepreneur, you've taken on three jobs, four jobs. It requires more time. But people start to relax.
Ah, my time's mine. My time's free. I love the freedom of being an entrepreneur. There's the greatest fallacy in the world is that you are free as an entrepreneur.
And as a matter of fact, you have more responsibility, more obligations, more accountability when you're an entrepreneur because there's no guaranteed money coming in. The biggest mistake, the biggest misnomer, the worst thing you could have as an entrepreneur is that somehow you're free because you don't have a job. Just because you call yourself an entrepreneur, if you are one, doesn't make you free. It's hilarious.
And it's why you're losing. You have this fallacy, this relaxed state of freedom where you're going to get around to doing things and you can go to the gym anytime you want to. And you're wearing your sweats at 1030 in the morning, right? You wouldn't do that if you work for someone else.
You don't do that when you work for you. And so the greatest thing I give you is the gift of many days. The next thing I want to share with you is that there needs to be an alarm clock. Where performance is measured, performance improves.
Secondarily, the more you can shrink the time frame where you measure performance, the better chance you can have to alter that performance and improve it. So what do most people do? They measure their performance. The average people in the world measure their performance at the end of every year.
New Year's Eve, right? Pretty good performers shrink the time frame. At the end of every month, most companies kind of do an inventory. Most people do an inventory.
They look at their books. They look at the profit and loss. They look at their schedule. And they make an adjustment after they measure their performance at the end of the month.
Really good people kind of get together on a Sunday night. They're pretty good performers. Once a week, they measure their performance. They make adjustments.
And they move on weekly. And then there's really top-level performers. And they do it at the end of every day, don't they? At the end of every day, they sit back.
They look at their calendar. They look at their results. And they measure the performance daily. Well, who do you think is going to do better?
The person who measures it once a year, once a month, once a week, or once a day. We all know. The better adjustments, they shrunk the time frames down. They adjust, they get better, they improve daily.
And then there's a max out 1% of 1% performers. And they have a clock that goes off every hour. Every hour in their head, an alarm goes off in my mind. It's sort of weird, but it works.
I'm addicted to it. Now, every hour, the top of every hour, at 11 a.m., it's funny. My mind just knows. What did I do to move closer to my goals?
What did I do to move closer to my outcomes? Have I achieved the things in my to-do list today? Have I achieved my biggest and baddest outcomes of the day? And every hour, did I move closer?
Did I move closer? What adjustments do I need to make? What do I need to celebrate? What tweaks?
What's been accomplished so far? An hourly alarm clock goes off in your head. If you can get to the point where you just begin to practice it, maybe for now, you program this thing to go off every hour, just to remind you, what did you get accomplished? Maybe when that hour goes off, you know what flashes on the screen?
Your outcomes and your goals. Hourly, the alarm goes off. Hourly, the alarm goes off. It'll begin to train you to begin to measure the time frame of your performance every hour.
Now, let me ask you a question. There's a group of people that measure their performance. Their race, their marathon is once a year. Then there's those that do it once a month and make adjustments.
And measure where they are and increase effort than those that do it monthly, weekly, daily, hourly. I can tell you that I run many days and I measure my performance hourly. It will transform your life. You'll become more productive in your family, in your personal relationships, in your faith, in your business, in your fitness, in your nutrition, in your money, in every area.
If just something goes off every hour, by the way, it's a five-second, just a reminder. If I move closer to my outcome, if I move closer to my to-do list today, what adjustments do I need to make? You'll be reminded that time of someone you forgot to call, an email you didn't return, a meeting you haven't asked for yet, something you're supposed to eat, hydrate, whatever it is. If you can get that alarm, just go, just five seconds.
It's just every hour, just five seconds. And I'll tell you, it happens to me constantly now. And I know that one of the reasons my life has improved is because I shrunk the timeframes down of where I measure my results, right? Where I recalibrate, where I course correct, where I make an adjustment, where I realize I'm behind, where I made a mistake, and I improve a performance.
And so, so far, can you imagine if you started just being in a bigger hurry and you had perception, correct, about how close you really are to your goal? The difference in winning and losing is this much. It's like a veil. And when you remove that veil, you say, my gosh, I'm so much closer.
I promise you, one of the things that you suffer from isn't just like a lack of vision and clarity. I wish you more clarity and more specificity in your vision, and I wish you more proximity, that you knew how much closer you were to achievement than you think you are. In fact, it's the fact that you think you're so far away from achieving these things that's causing them to constantly stay that far away from you because you're not running fast enough towards them. You're not measuring them fast enough.
You're killing your goals and your dreams by thinking they're so far away. It kills everything. If you knew how close you really were, you'd run so much faster. So if you altered that, if you altered the first 30 minutes to an hour of your day, and you just stopped letting yourself be a reactor, but you took control and became a dictator of your time, if you manipulated and bended time, like I have, to where a day is six hours.
Let the rest of the world think a day is 24 hours. By the way, someone just made that crap up a long time ago. An hour of measurement, 24 hours is a day, 365 is a year. Someone just made that up, and everybody's bought into it.
Well, guess what? I've made mine up. My days are six hours long. I've just manipulated and changed time.
It's a figment of our imagination is how time works. And what if an alarm could go off every hour in that mind of yours, in that heart of yours? Just check it. Just a wake-up call.
Just a wake-up. Just an alarm. Hey, am I closer to my goals? Am I closer to my outcome?
What adjustments do I make? What course corrections? What was achieved? What am I grateful for?
It's just a five- to ten-second reminder, and you're back off to the races again. If the earth spins around once, we call that a day. If the moon goes around us once, we call that a month. If we go around the sun once, we call that a year.
It's just stuff people made up, right? And so time is a figment of our imagination, and if you'd use your imagination, imagine what you could accomplish if you shrunk the time frames down. The last thing I want to tell you about time is that the best people I know have a focus on the future and use their time in the present. They focus on the future and use their time in the present.
Too many of you are focused in the past and are thinking all the time about the future dreaming and aren't taking advantage of the present. The present is a gift, and we need to treat it as such. The past is literally gone forever, and in many cases, it's a figment and a manipulation of our imagination. The future is grand and powerful, and we need to be focused there and thinking about it and dreaming about it because we are pulled towards it.
But the best people can simultaneously be dreaming and optimistic about the future and take massive action right now. Most of the max outachievers I know in my life spend almost 0% of their time on the past, and I'm talking about people who have pretty darn good pasts in some cases as well. It is wasted time. You're wasting time, you're stealing and robbing your future and your present by focusing any of your attention or thoughts on the past.
If the past, if it's negative and wasn't positive for you, is a place you should avoid forever, it's not coming back, it doesn't exist anymore, all we really truly have is this moment right now and our dreams about the future. If the past was wonderful and you were a high school quarterback or had a business victory or got a college degree or had an achievement there, those things aren't your present and aren't your future, and dwelling on them and focusing on what you've done previously is not going to produce for you a future. Here's the truth, your past does not equal your future. What will equal your future is what you do in the present.
And so I want to encourage you to take these tips I've shared with you today, and I want you to know, if you would make a couple of these changes, I can assure you, your future is closer to you than you think it is if you'll take massive action right now in the present. I have a really good friend here today, one of the most downloaded shows you've ever done before because, don't surprise you, you know him from television. He's an incredible television personality with ridiculousness and a million other projects that he's done, but I don't know him from that. I know him from his brilliance as an entrepreneur and as a human optimizer of himself, of time, and everything connected to him.
And he's a very, very good friend of mine, and I love my conversations with him. He's one of my favorite people I've ever met in my life to talk with, if not my favorite. And I thought today I'd just let you sit in on one of this. And we're going to talk today with the great Rob Dyrdick.
Welcome to the show, brother. And it was something about, you just realized, you read something on your lap, but did you text me this or did you post it? I just posted that I wanted to live one million hours. That's exactly right.
So you read something that convinced you that you could live to a particular age and you deduced how many hours. So I actually think this is brilliant because this type of focus causes us to live with intention and attention and the lack of, I think all the time, you know when I pray at night, you're going to laugh at this. Never said this out loud, not even my wife, but you and about 70 billion people are in there. When I pray at night, one of my last prayers is that I'm going to live to 128 years old.
And I really believe, now again, someone will listen to this in three years, but I have that prayer and that intention and I've repeated it over and over and over and over again because I believe if I don't pick a number, if I don't pick a time, if I don't set a goal, if I don't, then I'll be up to the whims of whatever else comes my way. And I really believe that you create a space when you set something like that that didn't exist before you did it and then you find the behaviors, the people, the things, the thoughts, the technology, the nutrition to fill it up. What I didn't do was calculate the amount of hours that it gives me to then optimize that time. So speak of that whole thing.
Yeah, and look, I'm, you know, it really makes me happy. That means we're going to, we're literally, we're going to be friends deep into our hundreds. We're going to be having these conversations about, what do you think? You think you're going to 128?
You think you're good? I don't know, I'm feeling pretty good right now. But I think about it more from a, this is what I'm big on. This is your existence, right?
And this is, this is the framework of the human experience, right? You only truly can judge anything, your energy, how well you're using time, everything that's happened in your past, how you actually feel in the present moment. You can only do it in the present moment and you only experience it in your mind, right? And then you have to make a decision of like, I want to change all of these things.
So I'm going to create a better future experience. That is the human experience. And I realized that I wanted to make it last to 112. I initially wanted to live to 104 and be shot in a rocket into space and explore the universe without the light pollution from planet Earth the last year before I died and then float it out into the cosmos.
Now, that was before I had a wife and kids. So it's like, now the audacity of, don't worry about me. And then like, I'm up there for like 24 more years. So that changed.
And then when I read the book, Ikigai, right? The Japanese long life and happiness book, they talked about super centurions. And I'm like, oh, I like that brand. I want to be a super centurion.
So then I made it at, then I made it that I would want to live to 112. And then as I started getting deeper into, okay, how many days is that? All right, okay, that's how many days I have. This is how many days that I've done so far.
Then when I was going through my time matrix and looking at all these different things where I spend time, I was like, wow, I spend nearly as much time shooting a television show as I will picking up my kids and taking them to school for the year, right? And to me, as I just started looking at these hours and then where am I losing a lot of time? On the couch watching Netflix. You know what I mean?
It's me and the wife on there watching our favorite show. But boy, when you start looking at what that is, man, you're letting the heart 8 to 9% go on the couch. You know what I mean? Like it's cold hard reality.
But as I looked at that, you know, I then was like, you know, what is like, what's a round number of time? Like, wow, 1 million hours is 114 years in 54 days. I'm going to experience a million hours on this earth, right? And so, of course, a lot of people push back on like, oh, yeah, you're like a vegetable.
What are you going to do? And it's like, like, I didn't even contemplate that. And it's because you live in two different mindsets. I live in a mindset that I just keep getting healthier and happier, more balanced, lighter.
Life is more effortless. My system, that is, my entire body is more efficient. And I can show you in blood work. I can show you in net worth.
I can show you in time. And I can show you in qualitative data that I have collected about how I feel about my life, work, and health, that I am in healthier, better physical condition, wealthier, more balanced, and happier in the data, which only proves to me there's no reason why you can't keep getting healthier, happier, and wealthier for the remainder of your life. And then I'll just fall right off a cliff. Whatever it ends up ending.
But again, what's it go back to? I want to live with absolute intention. And I want to experience every moment that I get into and feel the vividness and the richness and the beauty that is the human experience and life. You know, you don't want to be so future-focused and trying to create a better future that you never feel the present, right?
And so for me, I really began to understand what state my mind is at all times and how do I learn to control that and begin to put in systems and solutions that keep my mind in a balanced state is really one of the bigger things that I've learned to do over the last year or so. Sure, that's one of those systems. Well, you know, if you can imagine this, your mind is balanced in this way, right? It's past, present, and future, right?
And so there's sort of five sections as I see it. And on one end, it's dwelling in the past. You ain't doing nothing. You want to sit and dwell about something you did, you ain't doing nothing.
Then the next level up is rectify, right? You are problem-solving, taking action, something that happened in the past, so now you're in the present past where, okay, I'm dealing with something that happened. Now I'm problem-solving, taking action to make a better future, right? You sit right in the middle and you experience it or you go to the next level is creating, right?
And so now you're in this future present, right? Where you're experiencing the present while creating the future. That's where you want to toggle, right? Because what goes beyond creating the future is wishing, right?
Because if you're sitting there wishing the future was better and wishing like this will be like this or you're dwelling, you're not moving, right? And so you want to be either experiencing the moment or handling something that happened in the past present or creating something in the future present state and swing between that, right? And so if you can imagine, that's your mind, what you think about on an ongoing basis is ranges between all of that. That's where the action lives.
Now it's the quality of your mind and your mind's quality is either in a proactive state, a reactive state, an inactive state or a magnetic state, right? And for me, when all aspects of my life are in order, meaning I'm eating super clean, everything, all my goals and visions and everything is running smooth, I'm spending very little time rectifying the past because I've designed my present future experience with such intention, I'm dealing with very little disruption that then I eventually go beyond just being proactive to this magnetic state and I know you've experienced this before because this is when your everything is going operating at such a level that answers start coming to you without you asking the questions. It is the law of attraction that's the unexplainable force that lives in the quantum field where your energy is at such a high level. You are so clear of not only being present and experiencing but creating your better future and you rise to this, you vibrate to this level to where the answers show up and you never ask the questions, right?
And for me, I'm trying to master all aspects of my existence to where I basically sit in that state of toggling between future present and proactive and magnetic at all times. Oh my God. It's a deep one. It's a deep one.
Okay, that's an all-timer. That's a deep one. I want everyone to go back the last five or six minutes there. That's an all-timer.
When we talk, I always filter it through my life and my perspective and just realize something because I do know what that vibrational frequency feels like when I am getting answered to questions I haven't even asked. It's not frequent enough and the reason it's not frequent enough is I'm depleting my energy reserves to not put myself in a state where I can have that type of energy and what I call vibrate at that frequency and you're exactly right and that's the other reason why rest, recovery, being present matters. I just really pulled something here. I just really did.
But let me say this. Every single thing matters. Every thought, every action, every decision, every single thing that you do is interconnected to get you to that space and for me, it's like I think, oh, I'll have a glass of wine. I'll have a couple chips.
It will pull away from that. I'll make one bad decision from eating bad that will then cause me to be short with my wife that leads to this entire and pulls me right out of the magnetic state because it's like even when you're there, it's really sensitive and you could just get one thought that could rip you out of that. You could look at one text that could rip you out of that. And so that requires really, really understanding every single bit of you and then giving value to everything you do rather than trying to like pocket your values.
Oh, if I eat healthy. Oh, if I stay focused. Oh, if I clear out this stuff. Oh, if I rest or recover.
Versus like, no, it is all works together to make the best version of you. How committed are you? How disciplined are you to live at the level that you know you have to live at at a consistent enough basis that it becomes to compound effortlessly and become a way of life rather than getting disciplined again. That's really what it is, you know?
Well, for me, I burn myself out going from those states to the good state back to the bad state. I'm still having wine with you at dinner tonight, but I know exactly what you're talking about. And everybody, you all hear the show every single week. It's pretty rare that I'm this quiet because I just, I really process a lot of information when you and I go like this.
Yeah, that's good for me. I'm already thinking of stuff. I'm going to say, I'm going to teach them. I'm going to steal, but I'm going to make mine.
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Very short intermission here, folks. I'm glad you're enjoying the show so far. Be sure to follow the Ed Milet show on Apple and Spotify. Links are in the show notes.
Here's an excerpt I did with our next guest. Robin Sharma, welcome to the show. You're a blessing, Ed. Nice to finally meet you.
So let's have a look for a few minutes here. There's all this thing we can be doing to get to that everyday hero. First of all, just embracing that you are one. I think it's fundamental it's sort of one of these things that I've really improved out in my life but to the point of being transparent that my wife said, put your phone down.
Your daughter just said something to you. My daughter actually came in and said something to me. I heard none of it and walked out of the room. And then a few minutes went by she said, do you realize what I...
So there's these things even where you and I are we've got this advice and we've made these breakthroughs. There's parts of us we can go back to old patterns again. And last night I fell back into one of those patterns. So there are these obstacles to our peace.
There's these obstructions almost. They can be tools, they can be obstructions. You do talk a lot about the phone thing. Yes.
I think it was... Don't you ever do an interview like, man, I made it sound like I'm a lot better than I am. I know. I walk my phone.
I think it was Nelson Mandela said, if a saint is a sinner who keeps on trying, I guess I'm okay. That's awesome. That was Nelson Mandela. There you go.
There you go. There's all hope for us. There's all hope for us. I would say an addiction to distraction is the death of your creative production when it comes to productivity.
In the Everyday Manifesto there's a revolutionary rule called the five great hours rule. So you don't need to work for seven hours a day. I do not subscribe to Hustle and Grind. I don't work for more than a few hours a day.
I work four hours every week. I take four months plus off every single year. How I do it is in the book including the weekly design system. When I work, I'm away from distraction.
There's a difference between real work and fake work. There's a difference between real work and fake work. Let us not confuse busy with productivity. Let us not confuse movement with impact.
So I think that's really important. We can get into the Menlo Park and the type of total focus structures. But you talked about family. And I believe the greatest gift we can give another human being is the gift of our presence.
And if you look at the greatest heroes and the greatest leaders, they have an ability to be there. And the very fact you said it means you do practice it. And I can tell everyone watching right now you have so much presence. And I'm not talking about charisma which you have.
I'm talking about you are here in a world where a lot of people are cyber zombies and just not present. So I think you can change the world and live a world class life. Or you can play with your phone all day. You can't do both.
And we can get into the science of emotional residue every single time you check a notification. Every single time you like something. Let's do both of those for a minute. Because by the way, I only have four or five I think everybody's got four or five significant gifts.
Ironically, I consider one of my my ability to be present. And so when I almost violate that treaty with myself that agreement with myself it deeply hurts me when I do it because I don't do it very often and when I do do it it's pretty obvious I think because the contrast with the two. Can I ask a question? Yeah, sure.
How about this? What if you don't what if you build as part of your family culture no device is at the dinner table. Yes, great point. What if you have certain rooms like the family room which is really a family room.
Now that's good. Now that's unique. That one I've not heard. So what I did, what I did start doing is I left my phone in the car the first hour before I came home so I was at least engaged in presence immediately.
This idea that there are rooms where there are no smartphones is one of the most brilliant things anyone's ever said on the show. I mean, seriously, I'm going to do that. One thing I am, when I get a great idea, I'm very coachable. And I'll implement it like immediately.
I tell you that this evening when I get back, I'm like, this space right here, there's no phones in here. Here's another idea. Zero device day once a week. Do you do that?
I do. I do a number of days. And how do you do it? Your schedule.
Your schedule doesn't lie. People can say, this is important, that's important. You look at someone's schedule, that shows their truest priorities. So when you schedule it, you make what habit researchers call a pre-commitment strategy.
And by scheduling what I call a blueprint for a beautiful week, you can actually schedule. Saturday is my zero device day. You can do it two days a week. I would also, what I do when I mentor CEOs and Titans of Industries and Celebrity Billionaires, I encourage them every two months to take a complete week off.
If I say, go ghost, go dark. If you look at the greatest, Winston Churchill, how did he survive the pressures of World War II? He had checkers and chartwell. He had a retreat.
I think we must leave our usual place and get away from the world. Andrew White, the great American artist, he had Chavs Ford, a farm in Pennsylvania, and he had Cushing Nain, a little retreat where he would go to to get away from the noise of the world. If you look at J.D. Salinger, one of my favorite books, Catcher on the Ride, after he was 37, checked out from the world.
He worked in a little cottage every day in Cornish, New Hampshire. I think we must find time on a daily, if not weekly basis to get away from the noise so we can begin to hear the signal again. The signal. I love this.
I have to tell you that I think one of the things that surprised me most when I started to coach some of the more successful people myself was the time they take away. The ones that have the right amount of bliss. It's where their creativity comes from. It's what you're calling here the signal when they're reconnecting with themselves or reconnecting with their spiritual lives.
And I just bought an island in Maine. Why the heck did you buy an island in Maine? It wasn't that expensive, but one of the reasons I did it is that's almost like a territory of disconnection for me. And it's one of the reasons I did it.
There's not great cell reception there even if I wanted it. And it's an isolated place and it's where I go to hear the signal the way that you phrase it. This emotional residue thing, I'm just touching that really quickly because I've not heard this before. I feel like we all have these friends who aren't on social media or we even have some older friends of ours who aren't even in the text game at all.
There is a joy and a bliss that reminds you of a prior time in our culture that they have when I'm around them. A couple of my really, really great friends, there's a joy about them. I'm not suggesting that they shouldn't be on social media or shouldn't have a phone. In fact, I'm suggesting you do both of those things.
Having said that, there is some emotional deterioration so to speak that I agree with you on that happens when you're too engaged in them. So what were you going to say about that? That sounds like such an interesting point. I'd say a few things I think.
We're happiest when we're in flow state and as you know so well that is a term coined by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi of the University of Chicago. And it's based on a neurobiological mechanism called transient hypofrontality. The prefrontal cortex is the seat of our reasoning. It's also the seat of the monkey mind.
It's the seat of our inner critic. It's when we start to slow down or close off the prefrontal cortex. Transient, temporary, prefrontal hypofrontality, transient hypofrontality. Our prefrontal cortex begins to slow down and our brain waves can go from beta to alpha maybe even down to theta and delta.
And when we get away from our phones, when we practice what I call the three S's, stillness, silence, and solitude, our brain drops into flow. We not only feel bliss, there's not only a pharmacy of mastery that makes us feel good, but we begin to inhabit the secret universe known to the saints, sayers, greatest artists of all time. What I'm suggesting to you is Hedy Lamarr, Albert Einstein, Shakespeare, J.D. Salinger, the great business builders, not all of them, but many of them have one thing in common.
They spent long periods of time alone in quiet, often taking nature walks, working on their biggest problem, on finding the biggest solutions to their biggest problems. So I think you can play with your phone all day or you can change the world you can't get to do both. So transient hypofrontality gets you in a flow state. It doesn't happen if you're checking your phone 50 times a day.
So those people you talk about, they are present because they're away from the distractions. I say the second thing, emotional residue, it's simply the phenomenon that every time you check your phone, you take some of your focus and you drop it on the notification you just looked at. And that's why at the end of the day a lot of people can't focus is because they have dropped their focus on their phone, they dropped their focus on the TV in the background, they dropped their focus on chasing these shiny toys and these trivialities at the end of the quarter, the end of the year, the end of the career, the end of the lifetime amounts to nothing. And then the third thing to think about is cognitive bandwidth.
Every morning you wake up with a full well of cognition. So I think it's really important where you give your attention to. Cognitive bandwidth is almost how I would describe you. You have a tremendous amount I don't want to ask you about that.
We're going to have too much more time. I'm just really fascinated with you. So all our friends sort of told us both we should get together and do this today. Now that I'm with you, I'm really, I want to do this again.
I'm in the middle of you. I want like three or four hours of you and I just talking because I just think it's great for both of us and we're going to listen to it. I feel the same way too. I feel it's real.
It is real. But this cognitive bandwidth idea, I want to understand you a little bit. Let's just talk about you for a second. You're fascinating to me because you were an attorney.
And don't be humble when you answer this question, please. You have a high IQ. Dad's a doctor. There's some good DNA in there for sure.
But you have this amazing ability, Robin, for recall of quotes, of information, of facts and a very diverse set of skills. That's what I love about the book, by the way. I want to say this about the book again too. I don't say kitchen sink because that almost makes it seem unorganized.
That's not what I mean. But there's a lot in here that is not just what you would think about. Oh, I'll be a hero. There's a ton in here.
I mean, all the cognitive stuff, the neuroplasticity stuff, the stuff on how the mind works. It's so, so good. But having said that, what about you? Have you always been this way or is it because you are practicing in so many of these strategies that you're sharing that you've increased your capacity for recall, for memorization of even information and actually owning it?
This isn't just stuff you're quoting. You own this stuff. So I want to hear about you. And I'm fascinated about you.
When you have your show, I've told you that before. But tell us about you. No humility. I want to know.
Well, you know, I would say... Don't filter it. I would say, honestly, I would say I'm a very simple person. I come from a town of about 2,000 people on the east coast of Canada.
I didn't have a silver spoon in my mouth. And I don't think I have any real natural gifts yet. I've been at this field for 26 years. I live a very minimalist life.
I have very few friends. I do very few things. I am not a maximalist. I don't chase every shiny toy that comes my way.
We get major opportunities every day, 99% of which I say no to because I'm monomaniacally focused on the few things I want to build the rest of my life around. And I think if you build your life around just a few things, I think it was Confucius who said, person who chases two rabbits catches neither. Peter Drucker said it really well. He said, there's nothing so useless as doing efficiently that which should not be done at all.
And so I'm just... If there's one talent I have is I'm really clear on what I want my life to stand for. But I don't think I have any special gifts. But I call them the SOPs of AWC, the Standard Operating Procedures of Absolute World Class.
And I share them in the book. The book is really a love letter to people's highest mastery and promise. And these rituals, like the 5M Club and the 2020-20-20 the two-massage protocol, the second wind workout, the weekly design system, how I visualize, how I meditate, how I lean into fear each day. All those things, they really do work.
And so over the years, I used to be terrifically scared of public speaking. Like terrifically scared of public speaking. Incredible. But thank you.
But we have neuroplasticity. Our human gift is the gift of growth. The whole idea of heroism is ordinary people thrust into difficult circumstances and using the difficulty to triumph over tragedy. That's what makes us human.
That's why I wrote the book. There are so many people saying, well, I can't have more money. I can't have more love. I can't have more help.
I can't change the world. And here's a litany of reasons why. Well, if you recite your excuses long enough, you actually hypnotize yourself to believe in them to be true. Very short intermission here, folks.
I'm glad you're enjoying the show so far. Be sure to follow the Ed Milet show on Apple and Spotify. Links are in the show notes. Here's an excerpt I did with our next guest.
Dr. Taryn Marie Stayskull, welcome to the show. Finally, it's great to have you here. Productive perseverance is a powerful, powerful concept.
So I want you to share that with them. Thank you for that. So productive perseverance is the intelligent pursuit of a goal. And this is really important for us.
Aw, thank you. This is really important for us because I think we've gotten a lot of different messages about this in our society, right? So a lot of people ask me, is resilience the same as grit? Yeah.
Yeah? Angela Duckworth's concept of grit. And it isn't, right? Grit is about putting our head down, right?
And sort of throwing ourselves headlong into creating an outcome and just simply not giving up by dint of our own determination, right? Productive perseverance is about the art and the science of the intelligent pursuit of a goal. It's knowing when to persist even when we face challenges, when to be greedy, and when in the face of diminishing returns and markers in our environment that we should pivot in a new direction or even, you know, fold up the tent and quit, right? And something important to mention here about grit is that grit works really well like putting our head down in environments that don't substantially change.
So if you want to become a Navy SEAL, if you want to win the National Spelling Bee, if you want to graduate from the Naval Academy, right? It's really great to be gritty because you're going to follow sort of a formulaic series of tests and then come to your outcome at the end. But we also know a lot of companies that were super gritty and still failed, right? I mean, even the, you know, examples that I think come to mind for everyone, Blockbuster and Blackberry, like, right, like they were super gritty.
They were in it for the long haul. It's just that like the environment moved and changed around them. And so, you know, the opposite side of this is looking at how our environment is shifting and changing around us, right? What are the disruptors?
What's the volatility, right, that's occurring? And to be able to kind of balance our goals and our determination and our grittiness with what's happening externally and to continue to check in and be in this constant moment of balance. By the way, that's brilliant because there is this, I think we're in a culture that really emphasizes grit all the time. It's really like hustle culture, grind culture, grit culture, which by the way, without, you're probably not going to become very successful.
So it's super critical. But I think often like I got a chance to play a lot of golf or previously with Wayne Greski over the years. It's definitely different sports and that's the exact point you're making is that you can get so great. There's a lot of great players but only one was great at skating to where the puck was going and that's because he was doing it in an intelligent way.
He wasn't just grinding, just gritty and you're a million percent right as I was thinking of initially and that exact quote. It's amazing that you read my mind on that. So hey guys, have you ever noticed your sheets slipping off the corners lately? I mean, it may sound like a weird question but it bugs me.