Third Culture Kid to Third Space Builder: Ruby Pak on Identity, Friction, and Designing Belonging in Shanghai

In this episode, we sit down with Ruby Pak—hospitality entrepreneur and third-culture operator—to trace a life shaped by constant movement across systems, cities, and expectations.Ruby’s story begins in Hong Kong and stretches across Beijing, Vancouver, the UK, and now Shanghai—a trajectory that exposes the subtle frictions of growing up between cultures. From language barriers and social exclusion in school to the quiet recalibrations required in each new environment, her upbringing becomes less about belonging to a place and more about learning how to adapt without losing a sense of self.That tension carries into her early career, where she enters the world of luxury marketing only to confront the realities of office hierarchy, toxicity, and misalignment. What follows is not a clean pivot, but a gradual unraveling—one that leads her toward entrepreneurship in Shanghai’s hospitality and fitness scene. Through building Hasa House, Ruby begins to rethink what a “space” can be: not just a business, but an ecosystem for wellness, community, and self-reinvention.Along the way, we explore how cultural identity evolves across geographies, why career paths rarely move in straight lines, and how moments of discomfort—social, professional, or internal—can become catalysts for clarity. At its core, this conversation asks: What does it mean to build a life that feels coherent when your experiences are anything but?Key ThemesMulticultural upbringing across Hong Kong, Beijing, Canada, the UK, and ShanghaiIdentity formation under conditions of constant transitionLanguage, exclusion, and social integration in different school systemsCareer disillusionment and confronting workplace toxicityEntrepreneurship as a response to misalignmentBuilding hybrid spaces that blend hospitality, fitness, and wellnessResilience, self-awareness, and redefining success on personal termsKey TakeawaysGrowing up across multiple cultures can sharpen adaptability, but often complicates a stable sense of identity.Experiences of exclusion—especially through language—leave lasting imprints on confidence and belonging.Early career environments can reveal misalignment more clearly than they provide direction.Leaving a toxic workplace is often less about escape and more about reclaiming agency.Entrepreneurship is frequently born from frustration with existing systems rather than pure ambition.Physical and social spaces can be intentionally designed to support both individual and collective well-being.Clarity around one’s values tends to emerge gradually, often through periods of discomfort and transition.Chapters00:00 Exploring Liminal Spaces in Identity and Culture00:49 Meet Ruby Pak: From Tradition to Reinvention02:39 Growing Up Between Cities: Hong Kong and Beijing05:26 Cultural Shock and Early Adaptation09:06 Language, Exclusion, and School Life12:50 Structure, Conformity, and Education Systems15:31 Moving to Canada: A New Cultural Lens18:17 Fitting In vs. Standing Apart22:57 Navigating the Canadian Education System26:59 College Decisions and Identity Formation31:23 Reflections on University and Early Ambitions35:57 Time in the UK and Career Direction40:23 Entering the Professional World44:49 Workplace Challenges and Personal Growth48:01 Choosing People Over Prestige55:18 Building a Restaurant from Scratch01:06:17 Introducing Hasa House01:16:14 Lessons for the Next Generation01:26:25 Coffee Across Three CitiesLinks:福和光酒家 Fook Wo Kwong RestaurantHasa House RedbookHasa House InstagramHasa House (WeChat Account): Your Oasis in the CityThis podcast is brought to you by C^2 Collective, a multicultural nonprofit community empowering young people across China and beyond to think curiously, connect across cultures, and create positive change | see https://csquared-collective.com/ | We host events, run a social innovation network, and publish the Curation^2 newsletter @ https://imablur.substack.com/Music by Megan TanArt by Cindy Zhang从第三文化小孩到第三空间的创造者：Ruby Pak谈身份、摩擦与在上海“设计归属”在这一期节目中，我们邀请到Ruby Pak——餐饮创业者，同时也是一位典型的“第三文化成长者”，一起梳理一段在不同制度、城市与期待之间不断迁移的人生轨迹。 Ruby的故事始于香港，延展至北京、温哥华、英国，最终落脚上海。这一路跨越的不只是地理空间，更是文化与身份的反复碰撞。从校园中的语言障碍与被排斥的经历，到在不同环境中不断进行的自我校准，她的成长逐渐不再围绕“属于哪里”，而是转向如何在变化中保留自我。这种张力延续到了她的职业早期。进入奢侈品营销行业后，她很快直面职场中的等级结构、隐性规则与不健康的工作环境。她的转变并非一次果断的跳跃，而更像是一种缓慢的“松动”与重构，最终将她带入上海的餐饮与社交健身领域。在创立Hasa House的过程中，Ruby开始重新思考“空间”的意义——它不只是一个商业场所，更可以成为承载身心健康、连接人与人、以及自我重塑的复合场域。在这场对话中，我们也讨论了文化身份如何在不同语境中演化，为什么职业路径往往并非线性，以及那些来自社交、职业或内心的不适，如何反而成为通向清晰与自我认知的契机。归根结底，这期节目试图回答一个问题：当一个人的经历本身是碎片化的，我们该如何构建一种依然连贯的人生？核心主题跨越香港、北京、加拿大、英国与上海的多元成长经历持续迁移状态下的身份建构语言、排斥与不同教育体系中的社会融入职业幻灭与对有毒职场环境的反思将“错位感”转化为创业动力融合餐饮、健身与社交的复合型空间构建韧性、自我认知与对“成功”的再定义关键收获多文化成长经历能够提升适应能力，但也可能使身份认同变得更为复杂。语言带来的排斥感，往往会对自信与归属感产生深远影响。早期职场经历更容易暴露“不适配”，而不一定提供明确方向。离开不健康的工作环境，与其说是逃离，不如说是重新掌握主动权。创业常常源于对既有系统的不满，而非单纯的雄心。空间可以被有意识地设计，从而同时承载个体与群体的身心需求。对自我价值的清晰认知，往往是在不适与过渡中逐渐形成的。章节00:00 身份与文化之间的“边界空间”00:49 认识Ruby Pak：从传统路径到自我重构02:39 成长于多座城市之间：香港与北京05:26 文化冲击与早期适应09:06 语言、排斥与校园经历12:50 教育体系中的结构与规范15:31 前往加拿大：新的文化视角18:17 融入与自我区分的拉扯22:57 适应加拿大教育体系26:59 大学选择与身份形成31:23 对大学生活与早期理想的反思35:57 英国经历与职业方向40:23 进入职场44:49 职场挑战与个人成长48:01 在人和“名头”之间做选择55:18 从零开始打造一家餐厅01:06:17 Hasa House的诞生01:16:14 给下一代的建议01:26:25 三座城市的咖啡推荐福和光酒家 Fook Wo Kwong Restaurant: https://m.dianping.com/shopinfo/H43Tk97j6mVctbyv?msource=Appshare2021&utm_source=shop_share&shoptype=10&shopcategoryid=205&cityid=1&isoversea=0Hasa House 小红书: https://xhslink.com/m/3esgV8mWe0fHasa House Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/hasahouse_?igsh=MTNlZjRuMTI1cDlmMQ==Hasa House（微信公众号）：Your Oasis in the City本播客由 C² Collective 出品——一个立足中国、连接全球的多元文化非营利社区，致力于鼓励年轻人保持好奇、跨越文化连接，并创造积极的社会影响官网：https://csquared-collective.com/Newsletter：Curation² @ https://imablur.substack.com/音乐：Megan Tan视觉：Cindy Zhang