EPISODE · Feb 17, 2026 · 13 MIN
Today is my mom’s birthday. I’m still not ready to say goodbye. Ep 6
from Grace Lives Here · host Kris | Second Story Studios
I blinked, and I was in the middle of a nightmare I didn’t know how to wake up from... I’ve been staring at the date on the calendar. Today is my mom’s birthday, or it would have been if she were still here. I wasn’t going to talk about any of this yet. I didn’t know if I could keep it together long enough to get the words out. But my gut told me to do this now, even if my thoughts aren't perfect. Even if I can't keep it together long enough to get the words out. In this episode, I’m sharing how my life was interrupted last August. I’m looking back at the things I missed—the small signs that she was struggling and the things she kept from me. I’m talking about the anger I feel, the what-ifs that keep me up at night, and the reality of becoming a caregiver almost overnight. This is just the beginning of the story. I’m not sharing this because I am through the grief. I’m sharing it because this is exactly where I am. In themiddle of the ache that hasn't died. In this episode I share: The shock of realizing life is no longe r"normal." Why I’m still angry about the things she didn't tell me. The transition from daughter to caregiver. Dealing with the numbness and confusion of early grief. Thank you for listening and for giving me the space to say these things out loud. If you’re in the middle of something hard too, I hope you give yourself a little grace today. Even if all you can do is keep going. Grace Lives Here is made from moments like this one. If your story connects to it, you’re part of it too. You can reach me here: https://secondstorystudios.org Or email me directly at: [email protected] Substack: Kris Sinclair Writes
What this episode covers
I blinked, and I was in the middle of a nightmare I didn’t know how to wake up from... I’ve been staring at the date on the calendar. Today is my mom’s birthday, or it would have beenif she were still here. I wasn’t going to talk about any of this yet. I didn’t know if I could keep it together long enoughto get the words out. But my gut told me to do this now, even if my thoughts aren't perfect. Even if I can't keep it together long enough to get the words out. In this episode, I’m sharing how my life was interrupted last August. I’m looking back at thethings I missed—the small signs that she was struggling and the things she kept from me. I’mtalking about the anger I feel, the what-ifs that keep me up at night, and the reality of becominga caregiver almost overnight. This is just the beginning of the story. I’m not sharing this because I am through the grief. I’msharing it because this is exactly where I am. In themiddle of the ache that hasn't died. In this episode I share: The shock of realizing life is no longe r"normal."Why I’m still angry about the things she didn't tell me.The transition from daughter to caregiver.Dealing with the numbness and confusion of early grief. Thank you for listening and for giving me the space to say these things out loud. If you’re in the middle of something hard too, I hope you give yourself a little grace today. Evenif all you can do is keep going. Grace Lives Here is made from moments like this one. If your story connects to it, you’re part of it too. You can reach me here:https://secondstorystudios.org Or email me directly at:[email protected] Substack: Kris Sinclair Writes
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Today is my mom’s birthday. I’m still not ready to say goodbye. Ep 6
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