We can’t do it all: From guilt to growth

This episode features a reflective and deeply engaging conversation with Olivia Scobie. The conversation explores systemic issues in mental health care, particularly related to parenting and perinatal support. Olivia shares insights from her academic research, professional practice, and personal experience, including how her work with incarcerated mothers, her sociological background, and her own journey as a parent shaped her approach to perinatal mental health.The discussion emphasizes the importance of trauma-informed, community-based care, the power of choice in mental health services, the intergenerational nature of healing, and the societal pressures modern parents face. The episode also highlights creative programming like book clubs and listening circles that foster connection, reflection, and peer support.Important MessagesRethinking mental health access: Funding is a major barrier to high-quality, accessible mental health care. Olivia argues that people should have choice (in therapist, modality, frequency, and location of care) rather than being funneled into rigid systems like "6 sessions of CBT". Current policies do not reflect the diverse mental health needs of families and communities.Community-based supports work: Programs like book clubs and listening circles create space for shared learning and reflection. These supports empower both professionals and community members and help build local capacity for perinatal mental health.Parenting under pressure: Across diverse populations, including incarcerated mothers, the internal struggle around being a “good mom” is a common theme. Guilt, shame, and societal expectations are pervasive, regardless of background or circumstance.Intergenerational healing happens in steps: Transformation doesn’t need to be completed in one generation. Healing is a relay where each generation picks up a piece (like from anxiety, food policing, or body image issues) and moves the needle forward. This mindset offers compassion and perspective, especially for parents trying to do better with limited models or resources.