Why Your Child ‘Falls Apart’ at Home (But Not at School) | Ep. 165 episode artwork

EPISODE · May 11, 2026 · 24 MIN

Why Your Child ‘Falls Apart’ at Home (But Not at School) | Ep. 165

from Autistic and ADHD Kids Parenting Strategies: Every Brain is Different · host Samantha Foote

Connect with Samantha: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/ Join the Neurodivergent Parenting Community: https://www.everybrainisdifferent.com/membership   Samantha and Lauren open by discussing mom guilt and the importance of giving yourself grace when you miss commitments, lose your cool, or have hard parenting moments, emphasizing that apologies and tomorrow-as-a-reset matter. They then explain masking: children, especially neurodivergent kids, may hold it together at school and unravel at home because home is emotionally safe, not because parents are doing something wrong or the child is being manipulative. They describe how cognitive fatigue (executive-function demands), emotional exhaustion (managing expectations, social stress, fear of trouble, rejection sensitivity), and sensory overload (noise, lights, clothing discomfort) accumulate during the day, leaving kids with no capacity for even small demands like “How was your day?” They note masking can also differ between co-parents, and suggest school accommodations (movement, no forced eye contact, IEP/504 supports) and coping skills, with next week focused on making school feel safer.   00:00 Welcome and Mom Guilt 01:03 Grace and Repairing Moments 03:05 What Masking Looks Like 07:17 Why Home Meltdowns Happen 09:26 School Accommodations 12:15 Safe Parent and Coparenting 14:42 The Cost of Masking 20:06 Sensory Overload Stack 22:51 You Are the Safe Place 24:22 Community Support and Wrap Up   Connect with Samantha Foote!Website: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/everybrainisdifferentYouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@everybrainisdifferent

Samantha and Lauren open by discussing mom guilt and the importance of giving yourself grace when you miss commitments, lose your cool, or have hard parenting moments, emphasizing that apologies and tomorrow-as-a-reset matter. They then explain masking: children, especially neurodivergent kids, may hold it together at school and unravel at home because home is emotionally safe, not because parents are doing something wrong or the child is being manipulative. They describe how cognitive fatigue (executive-function demands), emotional exhaustion (managing expectations, social stress, fear of trouble, rejection sensitivity), and sensory overload (noise, lights, clothing discomfort) accumulate during the day, leaving kids with no capacity for even small demands like “How was your day?” They note masking can also differ between co-parents, and suggest school accommodations (movement, no forced eye contact, IEP/504 supports) and coping skills, with next week focused on making school feel safer.

NOW PLAYING

Why Your Child ‘Falls Apart’ at Home (But Not at School) | Ep. 165

0:00 24:25

No transcript for this episode yet

We transcribe on demand. Request one and we'll notify you when it's ready — usually under 10 minutes.

Frequently Asked Questions

How long is this episode of Autistic and ADHD Kids Parenting Strategies: Every Brain is Different?

This episode is 24 minutes long.

When was this Autistic and ADHD Kids Parenting Strategies: Every Brain is Different episode published?

This episode was published on May 11, 2026.

What is this episode about?

Connect with Samantha: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/ Join the Neurodivergent Parenting Community: https://www.everybrainisdifferent.com/membership   Samantha and Lauren open by discussing mom guilt and the importance of giving yourself grace...

Can I download this Autistic and ADHD Kids Parenting Strategies: Every Brain is Different episode?

Yes, you can download this episode by clicking the download button on the episode player, or subscribe to the podcast in your preferred podcast app for automatic downloads.
URL copied to clipboard!