Why Your Partner Can't Complete You

An episode of the Speakings podcast, hosted by Sondra Charbadze, titled "Why Your Partner Can't Complete You" was published on August 11, 2023 and runs 19 minutes.

August 11, 2023 ·19m · Speakings

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Summary

You can find the synopsis of this episode, further notes, and a convenient place to comment ⁠here⁠. I will also periodically update my thoughts on this episode's content at that same link. The key points in this "speaking": Romantic love is the religion of the secular west. We used to seek the One (the ground of all reality), and now we seek "the one," the finite individual who can fill our infinite hunger. Before the advent of self-awareness, we sensed our oneness (without being aware of it). Now there is an uncrossable gap between the experiencing self and the interpretive self (or story-self, ego-self). In this uncrossable gap, a desire opens up: for food, time, sex, love, success, anything to complete the fractured identity. The fantasy of the "other half" comes from Plato's symposium, in which Aristophanes recounts the myth of Zeus splitting a soul in two and placing one in each body, so we must find the person that carries the other half of our soul. But in fact, our two souls live side by side in one body, and completion cannot be found in another. However, real love can see past the story-self into the true, non-dual nature of reality. This is why romantic love can be so exciting, and even transcendent. Love is not only not blind, but is the essence of clarity and an enhanced form of rationality. How can we learn to approach each interaction from a place of completion rather than lack? If you have questions, comments, or suggestions for future topics, you can email me at [email protected]. You can also check out my website at ⁠www.sondrawriter.com⁠, where you'll find my essays and links to ⁠my memoir⁠. Music is L'épisode cévenol by Circus Marcus, from the Free Music Archive. License type: CC BY-NC.

Episode Description

You can find the synopsis of this episode, further notes, and a convenient place to comment ⁠here⁠. I will also periodically update my thoughts on this episode's content at that same link.

The key points in this "speaking":

Romantic love is the religion of the secular west. We used to seek the One (the ground of all reality), and now we seek "the one," the finite individual who can fill our infinite hunger.
Before the advent of self-awareness, we sensed our oneness (without being aware of it). Now there is an uncrossable gap between the experiencing self and the interpretive self (or story-self, ego-self).
In this uncrossable gap, a desire opens up: for food, time, sex, love, success, anything to complete the fractured identity.
The fantasy of the "other half" comes from Plato's symposium, in which Aristophanes recounts the myth of Zeus splitting a soul in two and placing one in each body, so we must find the person that carries the other half of our soul. But in fact, our two souls live side by side in one body, and completion cannot be found in another.
However, real love can see past the story-self into the true, non-dual nature of reality. This is why romantic love can be so exciting, and even transcendent.
Love is not only not blind, but is the essence of clarity and an enhanced form of rationality.
How can we learn to approach each interaction from a place of completion rather than lack?

If you have questions, comments, or suggestions for future topics, you can email me at [email protected]. You can also check out my website at ⁠www.sondrawriter.com⁠, where you'll find my essays and links to ⁠my memoir⁠.

Music is L'épisode cévenol by Circus Marcus, from the Free Music Archive. License type: CC BY-NC.