Cowpunchers!

Unforgiven directed by Clint Eastwood and starring Clint Eastwood, Gene Hackman and Morgan Freeman. Episode Roundup: Enjoy our latest episode before we return in September! The Cowpunchers endure a more tolerable, and non-romantic, outhouse scene. Mel enjoys the classic western one-liners. Stu feels bad about getting what he wants. Amy learns that murder is wrong!?

All the Pretty Horses directed by Billy Bob Thornton and starring Matt Damon, Penélope Cruz, and Henry Thomas.Episode Roundup: The Cowpunchers are unsure what they were supposed to care about. Stu discovers a new verb. Amy crunches the numbers and determines that this movie did not feature ALL the pretty horses. Two episodes late, it's the "Was It West?" quiz!

The Harvey Girls directed by George Sidney and starring Judy Garland, Ray Bolger and John Hodiak.Episode Roundup: This musical leaves the Cowpunchers hungry for more! Mel gets her conspiracy board out to illustrate the similarities between this movie and the musical Grease. Stu still yearns for the burlesque hell dimension. Amy implores you to remember that the TRAINS MUST BE FED!

Oklahoma! directed by Fred Zinnemann, and starring Gordon MacRae, Gloria Grahame, and Gene Nelson.Episode Roundup: The Cowpunchers are back with more dating advice. Amy tells of the glorious modernity to be found in Kansas City; including, but not limited to, an erotic kaleidoscope. Stu is banished to the Burlesque Hell Dimension. Mel draws connections between Oklahoma!, An American in Paris, and The Barbie Movie.

The Thirteen directed by Mikhail Romm and starring Ivan Novoseltsev, Yelena Kuzmina and Aleksander Chistyakov. Episode Roundup: The Cowpunchers further entreat you to kiss your boys. Stu advises you to find yourself a girl who will throw grenades at people who hate you. Mel appreciates a passionate platonic kiss between brothers in arms. Amy is deeply disappointed that the balalaika wasn't also a gun.

The Man from Utah directed by Robert Bradbury and starring John Wayne, Polly Ann Young, and Anita Campillo.Episode Roundup: The Cowpunchers recorded this episode from underneath a giant cowboy hat. Amy has tips for the "getting held at gunpoint" portion of any job interview. Mel is on a search for more dynamite. Stu is enthralled by two dummies falling into a river.

River of No Return directed by Otto Preminger and Jean Negulesco and starring Robert Mitchum, Marilyn Monroe and Rory Calhoun. Episode Roundup: The Cowpunchers take a trip down the infamous river of no return! Amy gives full marks for the Mark in this movie. Stu wants Robert Mitchum to show some kind of emotion. Mel recounts the dangers of filming this movie!

Trouble in Texas directed by Robert Bradbury and starring Tex Ritter, Rita Hayworth, and White Flash.Episode Roundup: The Cowpunchers imagine what it must have been like to be a parent in 1937. Mel strikes us with some facts about this movie's star, White Flash the Horse. Stu found the perfect coot to put on a bottle of a barbeque sauce. Amy's out here just tellin' the boys!

Watch along with the Cowpunchers as we joke, riff, and get silly! Sync up with our audio as we watch the second in the amazing Sabata trilogy. This is Mel's first watch of this spaghetti classic!

And you thought Sabatathon was over?? Join us for the Sabatathon Challenge! Test your knowledge of the Sabata trilogy against Stu and Mel with Amy's fiendish challenge!Afterwards, hear Mel's thoughts on her first watch of Adios Sabata!Happy Sabatathon everyone!

Wanted: Sabata directed by Roberto Mauri and starring Brad Harris, Vassili Karis, and Elena Pedemonted.Episode Roundup: The Cowpunchers watch a baffling movie with a bounty of quick zooms, dead end plot threads, and period-inaccurate gaffer tape. Amy says you're all jacket, no shirt. Mel demands someone give these actors a hair brush. Stu observes a coot drinking dirty dish water.

The Tin Star directed by Anthony Mann and starring Henry Fonda, Anthony Perkins and Betsy Palmer. Also featuring Lee Van Cleef!Episode Roundup: The Cowpunchers want to know what you would name your barn full of pigeons. Stu and Mel are disappointed by the lack of Norman Bates jokes in this episode. Amy wants to see those pigeons!

Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid directed by George Roy Hill and starring Paul Newman, Robert Redford, and Katharine Ross.Episode Roundup: This movie was a wild ride with a whole truck load of handsome! Amy points out that moving to Bolivia won't solve all your problems. Stu revels in the "College Dude" energy. Mel is pretty sure that a joke about Atlantic City from 1969 doesn't hit the way the same way in 2026. Work Sucks, Do Crime.

Ebenezer directed by Ken Jubenvill and starring Jack Palance, Ricky Schroder and Amy Locane. Episode Roundup: The Cowpuncher speculate on the kinds of gifts a reformed Scrooge might give for Christmas. Mel's birth is foretold by Benjamin Franklin. Amy reveals the terrifying orgins of "Tiny Tim disease". Stu quizzes Amy and Mel on Western Movie Geography. Happy Holidays everyone!

Shane directed by George Stevens and starring Alan Ladd, Jean Arthur, and Van Heflin.Episode Roundup: The Cowpunchers agree that having Van Heflin in your movie is worth a million points. Amy encourages you to adopt a cowboy from a rescue, and not from a breeder. This movie reminded Mel of TV's "Bluey." Stu is enamored with Alan Ladd's perfect hair.

Sartana Kills Them All directed by Rafael Romero Marchent and starring Gianni Garko, Guglielmo Spoletini and Maria SilvaEpisode Roundup: The Cowpunchers hold on for dear life in this lightning fast mess of a spaghetti western. Amy struggles to summarize this film. Stu wishes that Sartana had killed them all and not just a couple of them. Mel points out that this movie ends with a canonical cowboy throuple!

Hidalgo directed by Joe Johnston and starring Viggo Mortensen, Zuleikha Robinson, and Omar Sharif.Episode Roundup: The Cowpunchers watch all the pretty horses fight for survival in this True Story.* Mel tells us of the time she jumped across the Rio Grande in a single bound. Amy regales us with stories of her numerous victories in underground martial arts competitions. Stu relates the time he invented rodeos and how he was born a timber wolf.*Totally true, don't worry about. Stop asking.

The Valley of Gwangi directed by Jim O'Connolly, starring James Franciscus, Gila Golan and Richard Carlson. Featuring amazing animation by Ray Harryhausen. Episode Roundup: The Cowpunchers watch a movie that perfectly delivers on its promises, those promises being Dinosaurs and Cowboys together at last! Amy calls 'em like she sees 'em, and what she sees is pirates. Stu is enamored by a shirt made of ruffles. Mel, and all of us, would die for that tiny horse.

The Searchers directed by John Ford and starring John Wayne, Jeffrey Hunter, and Vera Miles.Episode Roundup: The Cowpunchers watch an examination of John Wayne being racist. Mel gets a cringe itch she just can't scratch. Stu wishes that John Wayne would have just had a villain era. Amy delights in watching the thirstiest woman in the West.

Pat Garrett & Billy the Kid directed by Sam Peckinpah and starring James Coburn, Kris Kristofferson and Bob Dylan. Episode Roundup: The Cowpunchers make some connections between this and The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford. Amy wants to know who left their gun in the outhouse. Stu curses Bob Dylan for making him feel feelings. Mel uncovers the secrets of the "coot suit". Unexpectedly, this movie seems to have it out for birds.

The Ox-Bow Incident directed by William A. Wellman and starring Henry Fonda, Dana Andrews, and Harry Morgan.Episode Roundup: The Cowpunchers are once again up against a town of assholes. Amy finds a movie that does, indeed, begin as most Western do. Stu finds much in this movie's message that could be applied to today.

Wild Hearts Can't Be Broken directed by Steve Miner, and starring Gabrielle Anwar, Michael Schoeffling and Cliff Robertson. Episode Roundup: The Cowpunchers discuss a very odd, dare I say, confusing, scene of horse touching. Detective Amy begins to suspect Mel of having once been a horse girl. Mel has some quibbles with some of the horse husbandry in this film!

The Rifleman - Season 3 Episode 28: The Clarence Bibs Story and The Rifleman - Season 5 Episode 5: Death Never Rides AloneEpisode Round Up: The Cowpunchers enjoy a more violent version of the Andy Griffith Show! Or perhaps a less violent version of Gunsmoke? Either way, we are treated with appearances by Lee Van Cleef! Stu diagnoses your husband with a terminal case of "Coot". Mel is very pleased at the outcome of the Super Bowl. Amy devises a diabolical game to close out Sabatathon 2025!

Watch Out Gringo! Sabata Will Returndirected by Alfonso Balcázar and Pedro L. Ramírez, and starring Jorge Martín, Fernando Sancho, and Vittorio Richelmy.Episode Roundup:The Cowpunchers are baffled and distracted by one very unfortunate beard. Stu really wants to take a nap. Amy turns the recap into a deep philosophical discussion about the nature of existence. Mel draws connections between this movie, Shakespeare's Hamlet, puppets, and a really bad game of Telephone.

El Condor directed by John Guillermin and starring Jim Brown, Lee Van Cleef and Patrick O'Neal. Episode Roundup: The Cowpunchers are delighted to see a new kind of Lee Van Cleef in our first episode for Sabatathon 2025! Amy left all her Santana references at home. Stu likes the hat tan. Mel wants to know what everyone in this movie has against underwear?? Stay till the end for the geography quiz and letters from our lovely listeners!

Once Upon a Time in the West directed by Sergio Leone and starring Charles Bronson, Henry Fonda, and Claudia Cardinale. Episode Roundup: The Cowpunchers make the determination that they'd be terrible 19th Century Robber Barons. Amy asks for "The Jug." Mel loved Claudia Cardinale's performance; hated her wardrobe. Whenever Stu gets thirsty, he asks for a cool, refreshing sip of Hat Water.

Horizon: An American Saga - Chapter 1 directed by Kevin Costner and starring Kevin Costner, Sienna Miller and Sam Worthington. Episode Roundup: The Cowpunchers admit that none of them have what it takes to make it out West. Despite Mel's affection for the UK, she is reminded of why we threw the tea into the harbor. Stu is excited to see the accurate historical portrayal of a huxter. Despite her contentious relationship with the montage, Amy trusts Kevin Costner.

Troublemakers directed by Terence Hill and starring Terence Hill, Bud Spencer, and Boots Southerland. Episode Roundup: HO-HO-HOWDY! The Cowpunchers bring the holiday cheer (and a vat of beans) with this Christmas Classic! Stu is your bean-counter. Amy delights in a gruesome Christmas tree. Mel is undecided whether or not she liked this one.

The Cheyenne Social Club directed by Gene Kelly and starring James Stewart, Henry Fonda and Shirley Jones. Episode Roundup: The Cowpunchers watch some cowboys have a midlife crisis. Amy is too scared to dance in front of Gene Kelly. Stu thinks Jimmy Stewart needs to lighten up a little. Mel is glad that Jimmy Stewart and Henry Fonda fixed thier marriage.

Blood at Sundown (released as "Perché uccidi ancora") directed by José Antonio de la Loma, and starring Anthony Steffen, Ida Galli, and Gemma Cuervo. Episode Roundup: The Cowpunchers are nearly trampled to death by a cavalcade of horse chases. Mel presents her scientific thesis pinpointing the exact moment that the movie began to suck. Amy is frustrated to find that none of the writers knew how siblings worked. Stu states that this movie is barely worth the price of admission, which is saying something because he watched it for free.

Forty Guns directed by Samuel Fuller and starring Barbara Stanwyck, Barry Sullivan and Dean Jagger. Episode Roundup: The cowpunchers are faced with relentless induendos in this 1950s Western. We handle it about as well as a handful of middle schoolers. Mel thinks that Griff's normal walk might be his super power. Stu is impressed by a large gathering of sweet looking dudes. Amy prefers a version of Tombstone where the leaders of the enemy factions want to SMOOCH. Stay 'til the end for an after Halloween treat as Mel gives a quick review of Bloodrayne II: Deliverance.

Ravenous directed by Antonia Bird and starring Guy Pearce, Robert Carlyle, and David Arquette. Episode Roundup: The Cowpunchers cook up a great discussion after watching this Halloween treat that gave them a lot to chew on! Amy draws a connection between MLMs and cannibalism. Stu makes that case that President Grant was a wendigo.

Rio Bravo directed by Howard Hawks and starring John Wayne, Dean Martin and Ricky Nelson. Episode Roundup: The Cowpunchers accidentally ruin Rio Bravo for themselves, but hopefully, not for you! Stu threatens enter the spirit realm in order to contact John Wayne. Mel deletes Jerry Lewis from her memory. Amy proposes a Roman style leadership structure for coots.

Frontier Marshal directed by Allan Dwan and starring Randolph Scott, Nancy Kelly, and Cesar Romero. Episode Roundup: The Cowpunchers are nearly overrun by an infestation of cowboys. Amy seeks directions to the next whiskey cart. Mel advises you to not threaten the people you like. Stu gets a lesson in how Vaudeville actors defend themselves in violent situations.

The Last of the Mohicans directed by Michael Mann and starring Daniel Day-Lewis, Madeleine Stowe and Russell Means. Episode Roundup: The Cowpunchers are reminded why we threw the tea into the harbor. Mel finds this movie too close to her personal brand of stress dream! Amy does not recommend you get burned at the stake. Stu posits that the movie The Assassination of Jesse James by the coward Robert Ford is in fact still going on. Will Mel and Amy get better at geography? Stick around to the end to see how they do on the geography quiz! We also have another lovely letter from a lovely listener in the pony express this week!

Winchester '73 directed by Anthony Mann and starring Jimmy Stewart, Shelley Winters, Dan Duryea, and a gun. Episode Roundup: The Cowpunchers welcome you to the Gun Show. Amy regales us with tales of the One Rifle. Stu has all the Steve Miller Band puns you need. Mel heads over to the Sherwin Williams for a gallon of Dutch Henry Brown.

The Man from Snowy River directed by George Miller and starring Kirk Douglas, Tom Burlinson and Terence Donovan. Episode Roundup: The Cowpunchers go back to a rainy day horse camp to watch a cozy movie while the boys are away. Amy wants to wrap herself in this movie like a big fluffy blanket. Mel wants to know why all the old west jerks are named Curly and is the evil horse a vampire??

Light the Fuse...Sartana is Coming directed by Giuliano Carnimeo and starring Gianni Garko, Nieves Navarro, and Massimo Serato. Episode Roundup: The Cowpunchers revel in a festival of double-crosses. Stu is fascinated by the proliferation of tiny guns. Amy comes up with the follow up to the series "Is It Cake?"

True Grit directed by Ethan Coen and Joel Coen, starring Jeff Bridges, Matt Damon and Hailee Steinfeld. Episode Roundup: The Cowpunchers advise you to stay away from your local murder-hobo. Amy wonders why the Philadelphia Flyers Mascot - Gritty - was not included in either version of the film. Mel wonders if Matt Damon's "Matt Damon-ness" works for this character? Stu shares what types of bait one needs to leave out to attract a porch-full of coots. Rooster Cogburn, get your fingers out of my mouth!

True Grit directed by Henry Hathaway and starring John Wayne, Kim Darby, and Glen Campbell. Episode Roundup: The Cowpunchers reflect on awful childhood haircuts. Mel warns us of the dangers of fourteen-year-old horse girls who are good at math. Amy successfully describes a snake pit. Stu is impressed by John Wayne's lumbering.

Annie Oakley directed by George Stevens, starring Barbara Stanwyck, Preston Foster and Melvyn Douglas. Episode Roundup: The Cowpunchers watch a 1930s biopic of Annie Oakley that is so loose with the facts that they forgot to put her husband in the film! Amy accidentally gets herself banned from watching any future Tobey Maguire Spiderman movies. Stu reveals himself to be a true feminist. Mel coins the new collective noun for coots, a Porchfull!

Cattle Queen of Montana directed by Allan Dwan and starring Barbara Stanwyck and Ronald Reagan. Episode Roundup: The Cowpunchers watch another Reagan B-Movie where the "B" stands for "Blatant Propaganda." Amy would like to see Barbara Stanwyck shoot more creeps. Mel doesn't like the character that the movie told her to like. Stu gave up half way and just watched baseball.

Seven Brides for Seven Brothers directed by Stanley Donen and starring Jane Powell, Howard Keel, and Jeff Richards. Episode Roundup: The Cowpunchers contemplate the question, "If a tree falls in the forest, and it crushes your parents, do you turn feral?" Amy unexpectedly learn a lot about ketchup. Mel successfully identifies the jumpy boy. Stu advises you to buy your crush a cheeseburger.

Calamity Jane directed by David Butler and starring Doris Day, Howard Keel and Allyn Ann McLerie.Episode Roundup: The Cowpunchers observe some gals bein' pals! Mel and Amy categorize Calamity as a lady coot and have an interesting digression about teeth. Stu is enamored by Doris Day, and would prefer we stop talking about teeth. 

The Mask of Zorro directed by Martin Campbell and starring Antonio Banderas, Anthony Hopkins, and Catherine Zeta-Jones. Episode Roundup: The Cowpunchers discuss the issues inherent in "Horny Confessional." Mel revels in all the clever one liners. Stu identifies Catherine Zeta-Jones as this movie's "sexy howitzer." Mel gets best-in-class on the geography quiz simply by showing up.

Ride the High Country directed by Sam Peckinpah and starring Joel McCrea, Randolph Scott and Mariette Hartley Episode Roundup: The Cowpunchers meet the drunkest judge, the most sinister set of brothers and your favorite western grandads. Amy declares that sometimes you just have to be a person! Stu becomes enamored with Randolph Scott. Mel is confused by Kate's choice of wedding attire. This episode is dedicated to Randolph Scott, and to a lesser extent, President Jimmy Carter.

Appaloosa directed by Ed Harris and starring Ed Harris, Viggo Mortensen, and Renée Zellweger. Episode Roundup: The Cowpunchers encourage you to wash your butt. Amy conducts a thorough investigation to determine what are the female lead's motivations. Mel felt the movie didn't live up to its name. Stu enjoyed watching smug dudes getting shot.

Spirit: Stallion of the Cimarron directed by Kelly Asbury and Lorna Cook, starring Matt Damon, James Cromwell and Daniel Studi. Episode Roundup: The Cowpunchers aren't crying! You're crying! Stu pitches a new reality TV show: Horse Wives. Amy suggests you watch this one with subtitles. Mel gives a stern warning about petting wild bison.

Death Rides a Horse directed by Giulio Petroni, and starring Lee Van Cleef, John Phillip Law, and Mario Brega. Episode Roundup: SABATATHON '24 ends with this bleak tale of greed and revenge. Mel is excited to hear Lee Van Cleef call someone an idiot. Stu concludes that if you trap Lee Van Cleef in a hotel room, you've only signed your own death warrant. Amy asks us all to roll for initiative.

Dig Your Grave, Friend... Sabata's Coming directed by Juan Bosch, starring Richard Harrison, Fernando Sancho and Raf Baldassarre. Episode Roundup: Can a Sabata by any other name be as cool? The Cowpunchers find out in this Sabata copycat containing a boat load of heinous hats, awkward fight foley work, and one truly unbelievable fake mustache. Amy picks a movie that is impossible to find, Mel uses all of her research powers to unearth it. Stu doesn't think this movie exists. We also answer a question from one of our lovely listeners about the Good, the Bad and the Ugly.