Feeding The Mouth That Bites You: Parenting Teens Into Adulthood

Dr. Ken and Cynthia are talking all things summer — because somehow it’s already almost here, and if you have teenagers at home, now is the time to start thinking ahead. In this episode, they walk through a practical summer checklist for parents: screen time, jobs, sleep schedules, dating relationships, family vacations, summer reading, and how to keep teens from spending three straight months attached to a phone or gaming system.Cynthia shares the story of the year she created an ambitious “Summer Bucket List” for her kids that completely fell apart within days, while Dr. Ken explains why boredom actually matters, why teens need meaningful responsibility during the summer, and how parents can create structure without making summer miserable for everyone involved.They also tackle the tricky balance of family time versus independence, how to think about summer jobs and volunteering, and why dating boundaries become even more important once school is out and teens suddenly have endless free time.If summer tends to sneak up on you every year, this episode will help you plan ahead. If you have a minute, please leave us a review. We love hearing listeners encouraging other listeners. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" hereYou can order Cynthia's book "Life Is Messy, God Is Good" hereYou can pre-order Cynthia's book "How'd I Miss That" here Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Happy Mother’s Day! 🌸🌸🌸In this episode, Cynthia and Dr. Ken talk through some of the lies so many moms carry—especially when it comes to their teens. They unpack that nagging thought that if a teen is struggling, it must mean mom has failed, the pressure to hold everything together, and why a child pulling away might actually be a sign things are going more right than it feels.Today’s show is an honest conversation around the exhaustion, the comparison, and that underlying fear that one misstep could ruin everything. But more than anything, this episode is meant to be a reminder that so many moms feel these same things—and we’re all in this together! If a little reset and reassurance is needed this Mother’s Day… this one is for you.If you have a minute, please leave us a review. We love hearing listeners encouraging other listeners. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" hereYou can order Cynthia's book "Life Is Messy, God Is Good" hereYou can order Cynthia's book "How'd I Miss That" here Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Cynthia came into this conversation ready to defend self-esteem like it’s a parenting essential. Dr. Ken… not so much.In this episode, they unpack what we actually mean when we talk about self-esteem in our adolescents—and why making it the ultimate goal might not work the way we think it does.They get into why constantly telling kids they’re amazing doesn’t always lead to real confidence, what’s actually normal when your middle schooler suddenly feels insecure about everything, and how the very things we try to protect our kids from—failure, disappointment, rejection—might be doing more good than harm.If you’ve ever wondered when to step in, when to hold back, or whether you’re accidentally raising an American Idol kid… this one’s worth a listen.If you have a minute, please leave us a review. We love hearing listeners encouraging other listeners. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" hereYou can order Cynthia's book "Life Is Messy, God Is Good" hereYou can pre-order Cynthia's book "How'd I Miss That" here Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In today’s conversation, we address a topic no parent wants to face—but many find themselves navigating: What happens when things at home feel truly out of control?We move beyond typical discipline struggles and talk about the moments when a teen may no longer be functioning within the basic boundaries needed to live safely and responsibly at home.Dr. Ken outlines three key areas parents should pay close attention to—situations that may signal it’s time to step back and consider whether additional help is needed. We also talk about the weight of that realization, and why needing outside support is not a reflection of failure as a parent.Specifically, In this episode, we cover:- how to recognize the difference between normal teenage behavior and deeper concerns- why consistency matters—and what it can’t solve on its own- how to approach difficult, honest conversations with your teen- what residential treatment is, when it’s considered, and what it can offer familiesIf you’ve ever wondered where the line is—or what to do if you’re nearing it—this conversation will give you a clearer framework for how to think about those next steps.Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Sleepovers: kids love them and parents have… feelings about them. Today Cynthia and Dr. Ken are talking specifically about sleepovers in the adolescent years—when it’s no longer just pizza and movies, but brings up real questions around values and supervision. Dr. Ken reminds us that sleepovers have changed. We can’t always assume shared values anymore, which means we have to be more intentional in how we approach them.With younger kids, we try to control the environment. With teenagers, we prepare them to handle environments that won’t match our own. That means having real conversations ahead of time—about phones, boundaries, peer pressure, and wise decision-making—rather than trying to manage every detail of someone else’s house.We also talk about what to do when the sleepover is at your house—why it’s okay to expect respect and how to involve your teen in handling issues with their friends. At the end of the day, sleepovers aren’t just something to survive—they’re a great training ground for real life.If you have a minute, please leave us a review. We love hearing listeners encouraging other listeners. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" hereYou can order Cynthia's book "Life Is Messy, God Is Good" hereYou can order Cynthia's book "How'd I Miss That" here Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

This episode tackles a question almost every parent of teens faces: What do you do when you don’t agree with how your kids want to dress?From short shorts to oversized hoodies (and everything in between), Cynthia and Dr. Ken walk through how to handle these moments without turning your home into a constant control battle.Dr. Ken unpacks why these conflicts are often less about clothes and more about ownership and independence, and how to set boundaries early while clearly moving toward giving your teen more freedom. You’ll be encouraged to say, “This will be your decision soon—but not yet,” and notice how that changes the conversation.They also talk through real-life pushback, how to approach piercings, what to do when your teen makes a decision without your permission, and why consequences only work if you’re actually willing to follow through.The goal isn’t to control every choice—it’s to prepare your teen to make wise ones when you’re no longer there to weigh in.If you have a minute, please leave us a review. We love hearing listeners encouraging other listeners. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" hereYou can order Cynthia's book "Life Is Messy, God Is Good" hereYou can order Cynthia's book "How'd I Miss That" here Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Cynthia and Dr. Ken dive into one of the biggest parenting struggles right now—adolescents and their phones. From screen time issues to kids finding creative ways around the rules (hello, burner phones and smartwatches), it’s clear this isn’t going anywhere.Dr. Ken reframes the whole conversation by reminding us this isn’t about controlling phones—it’s about raising young adults. That means setting clear limits (like when phones aren’t allowed), expecting pushback, and holding boundaries without being shocked when they try to get around them.We also talk about what doesn’t work (reward systems and over-controlling) and what actually helps—shifting toward conversations, ownership, and preparing them for life after your house. And of course, we hit the frustration every parent feels—when they’re technically following the rules but still glued to their phone.If this is a struggle in your house, you’re not alone—and this episode will help you think about it in a healthier, more realistic way.If you have a minute, please leave us a review. We love hearing listeners encouraging other listeners. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" hereYou can order Cynthia's book "Life Is Messy, God Is Good" hereYou can pre-order Cynthia's book "How'd I Miss That" here Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

We’re back for week three of our marriage series, and Dr. Ken and Cynthia kick things off with some true-or-false questions that prove how much questionable marriage advice is out there. From “marriage should feel easy” to “never go to bed angry,” we sort through what actually holds up and what doesn’t.From there, the conversation shifts to a bigger idea: maybe marriage isn’t mainly about being happy or compatible. Dr. Ken talks about how Scripture frames marriage as something that reflects Christ and the Church—which is a very different way to look at everyday frustrations, misunderstandings, and seasons where you feel like you’ve grown apart.They also talk about what that looks like practically—how to think about your role in marriage, how to approach conflict differently, and why constantly looking for better techniques might miss the point.No quick fixes, no five-step plan—just a better way to think about what’s actually going on.If you have a minute, please leave us a review. We love hearing listeners encouraging other listeners. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" hereYou can order Cynthia's book "Life Is Messy, God Is Good" hereYou can pre-order Cynthia's book "How'd I Miss That" here Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

This week, Cynthia and Dr. Ken continue their three-part series on marriage by unpacking some of the most common misunderstandings couples bring into relationships and what actually strengthens connection over time.From questionable advice heard in church classes to the classic “never go to bed angry” rule, the conversation starts with a few laughs before getting into why so many couples feel disconnected even when they genuinely want the same thing.Throughout the conversation, Dr. Ken addresses the fears many couples bring into marriage. Wives often fear being alone or unseen, while husbands often fear they’re failing or not measuring up. When those realities go unrecognized, even everyday conversations can turn into frustration. Dr. Ken explains how small shifts in the way spouses listen, respond, and support each other can change the tone of a marriage and help couples reconnect in practical ways.If you have a minute, please leave us a review. We love hearing listeners encouraging other listeners. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" hereYou can order Cynthia's book "Life Is Messy, God Is Good" hereYou can pre-order Cynthia's book "How'd I Miss That" here Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

This week on Feeding the Mouth That Bites You, Cynthia and Dr. Ken kick off a three-part series on Christian marriage.They start off with a little humor (including Cynthia’s list of things husbands should probably never say if they want to stay married), but the conversation quickly turns to a bigger question: why does marriage sometimes bring out the most intense reactions in otherwise reasonable people?From a Christian perspective, marriage is more than two individuals trying to get along. Scripture describes it as a unique kind of unity—two people becoming “one flesh.” That closeness is part of what makes marriage so meaningful, but it’s also why the relationship can feel so intense at times.Dr. Ken shares something he’s seen over decades of working with couples—many of the conflicts we think are about communication or personality are actually connected to deeper fears that husbands and wives carry but don’t always realize.Today is the starting point for a three-week conversation on marriage—we hope you’ll join us! If you have a minute, please leave us a review. We love hearing listeners encouraging other listeners. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" hereYou can order Cynthia's book "Life Is Messy, God Is Good" hereYou can pre-order Cynthia's book "How'd I Miss That" here Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this episode, Dr. Ken and Cynthia dive into the topic of “affluenza” and the real pressure many parents feel to give their kids more—more opportunities, more experiences, and sometimes just… more stuff. They talk honestly about the tension between wanting to provide well and wondering if we’re accidentally creating unrealistic expectations or entitlement along the way.From private school comparisons to lifestyle expectations and work ethic, the conversation explores how both wealth and worry about money can shape the way kids view gratitude, responsibility, and effort. Dr. Ken offers a thoughtful perspective on what actually builds resilience in kids—and why constantly shielding them from limits or discomfort is not helpful. Listen in for a practical, realistic discussion on entitlement, motivation, and how to raise capable, grounded kids in a culture that constantly wants more. If you have a minute, please leave us a review. We love hearing listeners encouraging other listeners. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" hereYou can order Cynthia's book "Life Is Messy, God Is Good" hereYou can pre-order Cynthia's book "How'd I Miss That" here Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Today we take on apologizing to our kids—or what psychologists call “repair”—and why it feels so hard for many parents. Dr. Ken and Cynthia discuss how older generations rarely apologized because authority was the priority, while modern parenting emphasizes connection. They unpack why some parents struggle to say “I’m sorry,” especially high-achieving or strong-willed parents, and Dr. Ken explains that healthy repair isn’t pretending your child did nothing wrong or giving half-apologies (“I’m sorry, but…”). Instead, it’s owning your reaction while still holding boundaries and consequences—modeling emotional regulation without acting like you and your teen are equals or roommates.Listen in today for a practical word on why apologizing matters and how to do it effectively. If you have a minute, please leave us a review. We love hearing listeners encouraging other listeners. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" hereYou can order Cynthia's book "Life Is Messy, God Is Good" hereYou can pre-order Cynthia's book "How'd I Miss That" here Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Is it normal for teenagers—especially seniors—to barely be home, seem disengaged, or act irritated when family time is required? In this episode, Cynthia and Dr. Ken respond to a listener question that captures a common and often heartbreaking parenting experience: watching a teen pull away while knowing it’s part of growing up.They discuss healthy separation and individuation, why this stage can feel especially painful for mothers, and how a teen’s distance doesn’t predict the quality of your future relationship. Dr. Ken explains the importance of strengthening the marriage during this transition, communicating honestly with teens about how their absence affects the family, and avoiding the slide from caring connection into control.If you’re parenting an older teen and wondering whether this season is normal—or how to respond without guilt, fear, or overcontrol—this episode is for you. If you have a minute, please leave us a review. We love hearing listeners encouraging other listeners. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" hereYou can order Cynthia's book "Life Is Messy, God Is Good" hereYou can pre-order Cynthia's book "How'd I Miss That" here Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Is your teen being impulsive, oppositional, or something more concerning—and how can you tell the difference? In this episode, Dr. Ken breaks down three commonly misunderstood behavior patterns in adolescents: impulsivity, oppositional behavior, and conduct disorder.He explains what impulsivity actually looks like in teens (and what it doesn’t), how oppositional behavior often shows up only around authority, and why conduct disorder is far less common—but important to recognize. You’ll learn how these behaviors differ, why the distinction matters, and how to balance empathy with accountability.If you have a minute, please leave us a review. We love hearing listeners encouraging other listeners. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" hereYou can order Cynthia's book "Life Is Messy, God Is Good" hereYou can pre-order Cynthia's book "How'd I Miss That" here Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

This week on Feeding the Mouth That Bites You, we flip the script.Instead of Cynthia asking the questions, Dr. Ken takes over—and interviews Cynthia on release day of her new book, How’d I Miss That? What follows is equal parts parenting wisdom, real-life chaos, and proof that even competent adults can forget to put the gas pump back.Dr. Ken digs into why modern parents feel so much pressure to get everything right—and why most of what feels urgent probably isn’t. Cynthia shares the heart behind How’d I Miss That?: the small, everyday moments that quietly shape our kids, our faith, and our marriages far more than the big, flashy ones. They talk about comparison, friendship, parenting with the long view in mind, and why love—not perfection—is still the question we’re meant to answer.It’s honest, funny, encouraging, and deeply relatable—especially if you’ve ever thought, Wait…How’d I Miss That?If you have a minute, please leave us a review. We love hearing listeners encouraging other listeners. You can order Cynthia's book "How'd I Miss That" hereYou can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" hereYou can order Cynthia's book "Life Is Messy, God Is Good" here Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this episode, Cynthia and Dr. Ken respond to a listener question many parents are facing: how to handle nicotine use with adolescents. The situation raises important questions about legality, respect, boundaries, and how parental authority shifts as kids grow older.Dr. Ken offers perspective on how nicotine use differs from alcohol and marijuana, why not all “bad choices” carry the same level of risk, and how parents can respond without overreacting or minimizing the issue. They discuss why consequences still matter, how those consequences should change as kids mature, and what it looks like to set clear household standards without turning the conversation into a power struggle.If you have a minute, please leave us a review. We love hearing listeners encouraging other listeners. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" hereYou can order Cynthia's book "Life Is Messy, God Is Good" hereYou can pre-order Cynthia's book "How'd I Miss That" here Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

This week’s episode was important enough to re-record: when (and if) you should push your teen to go to therapy. Cynthia and Dr. Ken unpack what therapy actually is, why forcing a resistant teen rarely works, and the surprising ways counseling can sometimes do more harm than good.Dr. Ken explains how to recognize when therapy becomes necessary, why parent coaching often helps more than sending a reluctant teenager, and what to consider when choosing a counselor—including privacy boundaries, insurance realities, and whether your teen truly needs a Christian therapist.They also address one of parents’ biggest fears: what to do when you’re worried about your child’s safety. With a practical, steady framework, Dr. Ken walks through how to assess real risk versus normal emotional overwhelm and how to respond without panic.Today’s show is for anyone wondering whether counseling is the right next step. If you have a minute, please leave us a review. We love hearing listeners encouraging other listeners. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" hereYou can order Cynthia's book "Life Is Messy, God Is Good" hereYou can pre-order Cynthia's book "How'd I Miss That" here Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

This week, Cynthia and Dr. Ken talk about the flood of parenting advice online—reels, headlines, podcasts, and posts that claim to have “the secret” to raising great kids. Cynthia admits she often hears something, remembers it later, and never actually checks where it came from. Dr. Ken steps in to help parents think wisely about sources, research, and trends—especially when videos or articles lean heavily on “brain science” that doesn’t actually match the data.Together, they look at a recent viral headline about teens’ brains “no longer listening” to parents and use it as a reminder that not everything labeled as research is solid or helpful. They also discuss why over-medicalizing normal behavior can accidentally excuse responsibility instead of building it. Tune in for a good reminder that being picky about the source of our parenting information is important. If you have a minute, please leave us a review. We love hearing listeners encouraging other listeners. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" hereYou can order Cynthia's book "Life Is Messy, God Is Good" hereYou can pre-order Cynthia's book "How'd I Miss That" here Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Happy New Year and welcome to 2026! Cynthia and Dr. Ken kick off the year by ditching the pressure of New Year’s resolutions and instead encouraging parents to look at their parenting trajectory—if nothing changes, is that a good thing or not so much? Dr. Ken shares three foundational areas parents should revisit as the year begins—places that often create the most tension at home and the most confusion for parents trying to do the right thing. Along the way, they address control, conflict, and the emotional weight parents carry when things aren’t going smoothly with their teens.Today’s show ends with an important reminder: your child’s choices are not a report card on your worth as a parent. Tune in today for a few thoughts on where to focus as we parent teens in the New Year.If you have a minute, please leave us a review. We love hearing listeners encouraging other listeners. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" hereYou can order Cynthia's book "Life Is Messy, God Is Good" hereYou can pre-order Cynthia's book "How'd I Miss That" here  Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

This week on the show, Cynthia and Dr. Ken dig into the age-old issue of entitlement—how it shows up in American culture and how it shapes our teens. They talk about the everyday behaviors that reveal deeper beliefs about self-respect, responsibility, and personal standards.Dr. Ken explains why raising kids who expect rewards without effort creates long-term problems, especially when it comes to character, resilience, and financial responsibility. Together, he and Cynthia unpack how well-intentioned parents can unintentionally undermine gratitude by giving too much without teaching kids how to earn, wait, or steward what they’ve been given.They also explore the power of perspective—how serving others, seeing real-world needs, and broadening kids’ experiences can dramatically reduce entitlement and build empathy. The episode wraps with a practical reminder: gratitude and responsibility don’t happen by accident—they’re taught, and they stick best when kids see their parents modeling them first. If you have a minute, please leave us a review. We love hearing listeners encouraging other listeners. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" hereYou can order Cynthia's book "Life Is Messy, God Is Good" hereYou can pre-order Cynthia's book "How'd I Miss That" here  Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/ Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

This week on the show, Cynthia and Dr. Ken dive into the often-overlooked world of adult friendship—why it matters for your emotional health and your parenting. They unpack new research on the “friendship recession,” why adults have fewer close friends than ever, and how that loneliness also impacts our parenting. Dr. Ken explains why parents need real community as their teens grow up and leave home, why your marriage can’t be your only source of companionship, and why having your teen as your “best friend” can be a warning sign—not a win. They also tackle what healthy friendships look like while raising teens, why reconciling well matters, and how to model connection in a screen-obsessed culture.Cynthia shares practical encouragement for making and keeping friendships—prioritizing connection, filling the gaps with positive assumptions, and not letting insecurity sabotage community. They wrap up with a conversation on introverts vs. extroverts and why neither gets a pass on building real relationships.It’s honest, insightful, and a much-needed reminder that friendships aren’t optional—they’re foundational. If you have a minute, please leave us a review. We love hearing listeners encouraging other listeners. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" hereYou can order Cynthia's book "Life Is Messy, God Is Good" hereYou can pre-order Cynthia's book "How'd I Miss That" here  Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/ Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

This week on the show, Dr. Ken and Cynthia dig into listener questions. They start with digital monitoring: What do you do when Life360 tells you your teen is speeding or texting while driving? Dr. Ken breaks down when consequences help, when they don’t, and why too much monitoring can accidentally communicate, “Your life is still our life.”Next up: a 21-year-old daughter who wants to stay at her boyfriend’s apartment when she comes home. Dr. Ken tackles how parents can hold to their moral convictions without assuming financial threats will change a child’s heart.Then they move to the rise in occult-ish curiosity—numerology, crystals, spells—and how to talk to teens about what’s concerning, what’s just cultural noise, and how to communicate your beliefs without panic or power struggles.Finally, they take on a question every parent asks at some point (okay fine… at least Cynthia asks it weekly): How do you connect with a teen who barely says three words? Dr. Ken explains why silence doesn’t mean distance, how to keep communication open without pushing, and why sometimes the most meaningful parenting happens when your teen grunts in your general direction.Today’s show is practical, relatable, and filled with answers to the questions you’re asking. Thanks for listening! If you have a minute, please leave us a review. We love hearing listeners encouraging other listeners. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" hereYou can order Cynthia's book "Life Is Messy, God Is Good" hereYou can pre-order Cynthia's book "How'd I Miss That" here  Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/ Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

This week on the show, Cynthia and Dr. Ken dive into the wild, wonderful, and occasionally mind-numbing world of youth sports. Dr. Ken breaks down what’s really going on inside our teens—whether they’re thriving, quitting, or somewhere in between. He unpacks why control is the number-one issue in teen athletics, why even highly talented kids sometimes walk away from their sport, and how parents can set fair expectations without taking over their child’s identity. There are also discussions on injuries, identity loss, parent pressure, car-ride conversations, and the subtle emotional pitfalls that come with living in a sports-centered family culture. It’s a practical, compassionate, and eye-opening conversation for every parent navigating the highs, lows, and hard lessons of teenage sports. If you have a minute, please leave us a review. We love hearing listeners encouraging other listeners. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" hereYou can order Cynthia's book "Life Is Messy, God Is Good" hereYou can pre-order Cynthia's book "How'd I Miss That" here  Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/ Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Today, Dr. Ken and Cynthia talk about how AI is shaping the world our teens are growing up in. From homework help to “AI friends” and therapy bots, this technology is moving fast — and our kids are encountering it whether we feel ready or not.Instead of panic or hard bans, Dr. Ken encourages thoughtful, ongoing conversations. We discuss how AI is affecting schools, what healthy use can look like, and why it's important to help teens think critically rather than rely on technology to think or feel for them.We also address the emotional side: AI that feels encouraging or “understanding” can be appealing, especially for kids who feel alone or unsure socially. But simulated support is not real relationship. Parents can help teens stay grounded, connected, and aware of the difference between feeling understood and being truly known by real people. If you have a minute, please leave us a review. We love hearing listeners encouraging other listeners. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" hereYou can order Cynthia's book "Life Is Messy, God Is Good" hereYou can pre-order Cynthia's book "How'd I Miss That" here  Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/ Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Today we’re talking marriage with Dr. Ken Wilgus — not our marriages (although we detoured there), but our kids’ future ones. Dr. Ken discusses research that says we shouldn’t panic if our kids consider getting married younger than the cultural norm. Marriage isn't just a “capstone” once you're fully established — sometimes it’s a cornerstone that builds adulthood together.We unpack cultural trends, fear-based parenting, and why avoiding the dating conversation doesn’t actually protect your teens. Dr. Ken challenges us to talk openly about marriage, consider how our own marriage baggage might influence our advice, and stop assuming later is always better.We wrap with dating checklists, the pressure Christian young adults feel to find the “perfect godly spouse,” and one final gold-nugget from Dr. Ken that you cannot miss (hint: it has to do with our own marriages). If you have a minute, please leave us a review. We love hearing listeners encouraging other listeners. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" hereYou can order Cynthia's book "Life Is Messy, God Is Good" hereYou can pre-order Cynthia's book "How'd I Miss That" here  Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/ Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

From managing the influence of social media to knowing when (and how) to step in, this conversation reminds us that our role as parents isn’t to fix everything—it’s to stay present and connect with our kids often.If you have a minute, please leave us a review. We love hearing listeners encouraging other listeners. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" hereYou can order Cynthia's book "Life Is Messy, God Is Good" here Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected]  Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/ Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Dr. Ken takes on a tough but deeply relatable topic for many parents—what to do when a child drifts from faith, family values, or relationship. Whether it’s a season of wandering, strained connections, or hard choices that break your heart, this conversation walks us through what it looks like to navigate prodigal seasons with our teens.Cynthia and Dr. Ken talk about the difference between a child who’s estranged from you versus estranged from God, why power dynamics so often make things worse, and how to focus less on control and more on trust. They also get practical about how parenting shifts with age—what authority looks like with teens at home versus young adults on their own.And through it all, there’s hope: that God works even in the wandering, and that as parents we can walk this road without shame, judgment, or isolation. Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this episode, Dr. Ken tackles the often tricky topic of finances with teenagers and young adults. From who pays for what to how much control parents should keep as kids become more independent, they unpack what it looks like to guide—not grip—the financial reins.Dr. Ken and Cynthia dig into everything from financial responsibility in high school to the bigger choices college students face. They talk about how a parent’s own relationship with money inevitably trickles down to their kids, why letting teens make a few bad choices can be healthy, and they even wade into topics like tithing, allowance, and that awkward moment when you realize your fully grown child is still on your family phone plan.It’s a candid, practical conversation with plenty of laughs and some real talk about equipping teens to make wise financial choices—even when it’s uncomfortable, unexpected, or involves a questionable boat. Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

This week on Feeding the Mouth That Bites You, Dr. Ken unpacks a word every parent has heard lately—dysregulation—and what it really looks like in teenagers. Spoiler: it’s not always as clinical or mysterious as it sounds. Sometimes it’s just what we used to call “spiraling” or “losing it.” We talk about how to tell the difference between a teen who’s simply being disrespectful and one who’s truly overwhelmed by emotion, and why calling everything “dysregulation” can actually make parenting harder. Dr. Ken breaks down what’s happening when your teen crosses that line from moody to out-of-control, why they can usually hold it together outside the home, and what to do when they can’t. We also get real about what happens when we join the chaos. If you’ve ever found yourself matching your teen’s energy (or volume), this conversation will give you a few tools—and probably a laugh—to help you step back and respond differently. It’s a practical, hope-filled episode for every parent navigating big emotions, slammed doors, and late-night drama. Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

This week Dr. Ken and Cynthia discuss a challenge almost every parent faces—what to do when you and your spouse don’t see eye-to-eye on planned emancipation. From different approaches to devices and curfews, it’s not always easy to stay on the same page while raising young adults.We discuss why keeping your marriage first changes the conversation, how to navigate disagreements without turning them into power struggles, and what it looks like to support each other even when you don’t fully agree. We also touch on blended families and shared custody, and why it’s never too late to start giving teens the message that they’re growing into adulthood.It’s a practical, hope-filled conversation with plenty of humor (including a surprise iPad cameo from Cynthia’s youngest) and the kind of perspective every parent needs when the plan and the parenting don’t always match up.  Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

This week Dr. Ken dives into a topic every parent is facing—how to walk with teenagers when the news in our country feels heavy and unsettling. From tragic events to the endless political chatter on social media, it can be hard to know how to navigate this with our teens. We talk about the tension of wanting to protect our kids while also respecting that they’re young adults who see and hear more than we realize.We also wrestle through questions like: How do we start meaningful conversations without turning it into a lecture? When is it wise to bring faith into the discussion, and when is it better to simply listen? And how do we model trust in God when the culture feels anything but steady?It’s a practical and encouraging conversation about parenting in a media-saturated world—offering perspective, a little humor, and those planned-emancipation reminders we all need when the world feels unsteady.   Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Today we tackle the common issue of how parents should handle planned emancipation when their teenager carries one or more diagnoses like ADHD or Oppositional Defiant Disorder or Autism Spectrum Disorder or Dyslexia or Depression or Anxiety or Trauma etc. etc. etc. This question comes up a lot! Dr. Ken’s take is clear and freeing—the diagnosis shapes how you coach but not whether you give freedoms. Parents can adjust their approach, offer tools, and expect some natural consequences, but lowering the bar only delays the growth they’ll need when the world stops making accommodations. If you have a minute, please leave us a review. We love hearing listeners encouraging other listeners. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" here.Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent  Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

This week we talk about teenagers who seem very eager to grow up and those who seem to fear adulthood. How should parents handle those differences? Is this a temperament thing? Are they afraid to leave us? Isn't it a good thing if our adolescents feel like they want to hang with us all the time? We cover this and much more. Did you even know we have an Instagram account? Dr. Ken didn't! Plus Dr. Ken and Cynthia decide on a "safe word" if Cynthia goes off the rails! If you have a minute, please leave us a review. We love hearing listeners encouraging other listeners. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" here: https://a.co/d/hBnlbzI Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] or check us out on Instagram! Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/ Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

We're starting off our 6th season with a bang! Today we review the things you need to check as a parent to help the new school year start off right. Feeding The Mouth parents know to review their teenagers' freedoms, expectations and who's more worried about school, you or your kid? This year you better double check your teenager's school cell phone policy. Jonathan Haidt's book, "The Anxious Generation" https://a.co/d/bfHCLmG (see Episode 181) is having major effects around the world. Also, "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" makes a major step forward as Jessica steps back from hosting the show (you can't believe all that she has going on) but, believe it or not, we talked Cynthia Yanof (see episode 171) to take over as host of the show. This is going to be fun! If you have a minute, please leave us a review. We love hearing listeners encouraging other listeners. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" here: https://a.co/d/hBnlbzI Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/ Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Well it's that time again. School's out for a lot of you and Jessica and Dr. Ken are breaking for the summer. We leave with a few reminders for summer with teenagers. Hint: it has to do with those stupid phones. If you have time, drop us a line this summer with questions or further thoughts on topics you want to hear on "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You." Your feedback really helps. Thanks to you all who have made "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" among the top parenting teens podcasts. If you have a minute, please leave us a review. We love hearing listeners encouraging other listeners. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" here: https://a.co/d/hBnlbzI Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/ Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Today we take on some of the questions we get from parents. How can you give room freedom if your teenager shares that room with a sibling? What can parents do about making sure their adolescent is eating well? Also, Jessica accidentally hits a nerve with Dr. Ken by asking about what sources parents use to get parenting advice. Cue the soapbox. If you have a minute, please leave us a review. We love hearing listeners encouraging other listeners. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" here: https://a.co/d/hBnlbzI Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/ Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Today, Dr. Ken interviews Jessica who tells her own story of being proactive in overcoming the trend toward isolation that pervades our culture. Parents can't just set up "play dates" for their teenagers, they must themselves have a grounded group of friends who they share their lives with. What role does extended family play in these essential relationships? What about just being friends with the parents of your kids friends? We discuss these and other aspects of pushing back against an increasingly individualized culture. If you have a minute, please leave us a review. We love hearing listeners encouraging other listeners. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" here: https://a.co/d/hBnlbzI Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/ Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Today we review a growing trend of adults choosing to go "no contact" with their parents. Dr. Ken reviews the kind of circumstances that do call on people to put strict boundaries around their contact with parents and other family members. This new trend however, seems to stem from a growing number of therapists that have over-defined trauma and therefore recommend that their clients eliminate any person that they no longer find "supportive." Today's episode stems from the New Yorker article of the same name - https://www.newyorker.com/culture/annals-of-inquiry/why-so-many-people-are-going-no-contact-with-their-parents If you have a minute, please leave us a review. We love hearing listeners encouraging other listeners. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" here: https://a.co/d/hBnlbzI Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/ Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Here's the link to the "Awkward Graph" Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Today we revisit the topic of sex and dating. How should parents talk about it with their teenagers? What if my teen doesn't seem to have any interest in these sorts of issues? Is it a good idea to get your kid on birth control? Jessica and Dr. Ken talk about all this and more. Dr. Ken references the book "The Case Against the Sexual Revolution" by Louise Perry - https://a.co/d/evvl3pc If you have a minute, please leave us a review. We love hearing listeners encouraging other listeners. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" here: https://a.co/d/hBnlbzI Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/ Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Recent headlines tell us about a rise in teen boys being lured into sending explicit photos and then blackmailed for money to avoid these being published on the web. Some of these cases have resulted in suicide and the FBI has sent out warnings to parents. Of course, exploitation through explicit photos is nothing new to teen girls as well. How are parents to respond to these threats? Jessica and Dr. Ken approach these issues as an opportunity for real dialogue and not another occasion for fear. Open conversation about online threats are particularly important for parents of teenagers that may appear to be innocent of any sexual interest. Adolescents need to be prepared for online threats not just protected. We cover all this and more. Dr. Ken references the resource, "Take It Down" to help fight online publishing of explicit photos: https://takeitdown.ncmec.org/ If you have a minute, please leave us a review. We love hearing listeners encouraging other listeners. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" here: https://a.co/d/hBnlbzI Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/ Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Today Dr. Ken and Jessica discuss all things addiction related. More parents worry about addiction in their kids. Is this awareness a good thing? What is the value in classifying certain problems as "an addiction"? What can parents do when they worry their teen is addicted to alcohol, drugs or anything else? What about adolescents who have a parent who is an addict? If you have a minute, please leave us a review. We love hearing listeners encouraging other listeners. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" here: https://a.co/d/hBnlbzI Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/ Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Today we finish our series on limit-setting with teens by covering common, miscellaneous issues. These are the things that often come up like, what to do about lying, is there a maximum effective time limit to grounding, or how to best limit disrespect. What about those teenagers that continually harass parents until they give in? As usual Jessica and Dr. Ken focus on being effective in limiting inappropriate or dangerous behavior while maintaining a path toward age-appropriate independence. If you have a minute, please leave us a review. We love hearing listeners encouraging other listeners. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" here: https://a.co/d/hBnlbzI Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/ Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

It's not uncommon for parents to have differences in what they prioritize and the ways they implement limits with their teenagers. It is essential however, that parents do all they can to overcome these differences and present a unified message to their teens. This is important not just for your marriage but for your effectiveness with your adolescents. When you as a parent have different limits from their other parent, teenagers don't "secretly realize" that you're the right parent, they just think both parents are nuts. Jessica and Dr. Ken discuss ways to overcome these differences and how to talk about them effectively with your spouse. We also cover the difficult task of dealing with an ex-spouse who has greatly different expectations as well. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" here: https://a.co/d/hBnlbzI Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/ Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Today we continue with our series on effective limit-setting with adolescents. Some parents think when they lose their temper with teenagers they "hate to do it" but it "needed to happen." Jessica and Dr. Ken talk about how yelling only confirms a teenager's suspicion in the first place... that you're a bully not really a parent. Instead we talk about ways to avoid losing your temper and what to do if you still occasionally get pretty angry with your teenager. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" here: https://a.co/d/hBnlbzI Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/ Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Today we continue with issues related to limit-setting with teenagers. As tempting as it is, making speeches is very ineffective in influencing adolescent behavior. Teenagers need to experience the consequences of their choices, either natural or through parent consequences. Jessica and Dr. Ken talk about both of their own struggles to avoid this trap and the situations that tempt parents to pontificate instead of act. We offer suggestions to increase your adolescent's learning experiences while reserving words for the most useful opportunities. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" here: https://a.co/d/hBnlbzI Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/ Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Today is the first in a series on limit-setting with adolescents. Probably the most important change a parent can make in being more effective in setting limits with teenagers is to shift your job description from a "cop" to a judge. Understanding what you as a parent can and cannot control makes a huge difference in how and when you set limits for your teen. When your teen is being most defiant, always remember the power of "the smile." You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" here: https://a.co/d/hBnlbzI Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/ Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

This week we continue our review and clarifying the process known as "Planned Emancipation." Last week we talked about the "Freedoms List" and this week we take on a completely different list; the "Expectations and Consequences List." We review the purpose of having this list (i.e. to reduce conflict at home, the strengthen your effectiveness) as well as the critical factors in implementing this list. We review many questions like "what do I do when my teen is constantly late in the mornings before school?" "How can I get her to do her chores around the house?" as well as issues of cursing, school grades, curfew and much more. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" here: https://a.co/d/hBnlbzI Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/ Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Many of the questions that listeners send us ask for more details on the "Freedoms List" and the "Expectations and Consequences" list. How are they different? Can't we just put both of these on one, big list? Today we take on part one of these questions and clarify what the freedoms list is for and why it's different from the expectations and consequences list (which we'll talk about next week). We answer many other questions like, should you present these 2 lists at the same time? Are there other ways to grant freedoms other than putting them on a list? We discuss these and other questions on this first of a two part discussion. You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" here: https://a.co/d/hBnlbzI Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/ Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Does your teenager have a job? Should you make them get one? When? How? Today we talk about the challenges and importance of adolescent job experiences. How should parents balance adolescent work over the summer with important family vacation time? Should a college kid "follow their heart" or get a marketable degree? Today we discuss all things job related including Jessica and Dr. Ken's work history as adolescents (SPOILER: Dr. Ken got fired... sorta). You can order Dr. Ken's book "Feeding The Mouth That Bites You" here: https://a.co/d/hBnlbzI Got questions or feedback? We want to hear from you! [email protected] Music provided by the great John David Kent - https://www.johndavidkent.com/ Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy