Let's Talk Polyamory Podcast

PODCAST · society

Let's Talk Polyamory Podcast

You co-hosts T&A, Tara Lynne Franco, Relationship and Awesomeness Coach & André Turcotte, Sex+ Psychotherapist, share their ideas and advice on how to have authentic, connected, secure and sexy non-monogamous relationships whether you're monogamish, in an open relationship, a swinger, polyamorous or a relationship anarchist!They bring together knowledge their years of personal experiences in polyamory, their professional practices working with individuals and couples, professional training + the best information available out there! Visit https://www.taraandandre.com/

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    82: Part 2: How to Get Back on Track When Your Communication Goes Off the Rails

    Most people don’t realize how easily they derail the conversations that matter most, until they learn what to look for.In Part 2 of this series, we unpack the hidden patterns that quietly sabotage connection, like kitchen sinking, labeling, interrupting, blaming, mind reading, layering, and passive-aggressive habits. More importantly, we show you how to recognize these patterns in real time and shift them into clear, grounded, and effective communication.We also explore how outside influences, like stress, emotional triggers, and past experiences can take over your conversations without you even noticing. From there, we guide you back to presence, empathy, and solution-focused dialogue using practical, easy-to-apply tools.You’ll learn frameworks like Non-Violent Communication (NVC) and our Attunement Communication Method™, designed to help you move from conflict to connection, without losing your voice.If you’re tired of feeling unheard, misunderstood, or stuck in the same arguments, this episode offers a clear path forward. Honest, effective communication isn’t just a “nice to have”, it’s the foundation of strong, thriving relationships, especially in non-monogamous dynamics where trust and transparency matter deeply.Whether you have a partner, dating or single, this episode will help you break negative cycles and build more authentic, connected conversations.And if you want to go deeper, join T&A live for Deep Dive Thursdays at the Mermaid Lounge on May 14 at 8PM for a special talk: The Other Sexy Talk: More Foreplay for Better Sex. Details and tickets available at: https://thexclub.net/event_description.php?event=697Resources:Get our free How to Shift From Destructive to Effective Communication Worksheet - https://worksheet.letstalkpolyamory.com/communicationworksheet Looking for community? Join our Let's Talk Polyamory private Facebook group - ⁠https://www.facebook.com/groups/letstalkpoly⁠New and looking to build a secure foundation including how to effectively communicate with your partners? Our Poly Newbies Digital Course is for you! Get it for only $97 for a limited time for our listeners- https://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiesspecialoffer Looking for therapy?  Arrange a complimentary therapy consultation with André at ⁠https://book.a-psych-online.com/therapyconsultation⁠ Book a complimentary coaching consultation call with Tara at: ⁠⁠https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue⁠⁠

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    Part 1: How to Get Back on Track When Your Communication Goes Off the Rails

    It’s a quickie, but a good one! An unfiltered special episode recorded from our bed!In it, we break down a real-life situation where things built up, our communication took a nosedive, and it felt like our communication went completely off the rails.We take full ownership of the destructive patterns we fell into - practicing responses, layering/stacking, “yes, but”-ing, and how HALTA (Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired & Anxious) was impacting us.We walk you through exactly what happened, how it unfolded, and what we did to repair, pausing, resetting, and coming back to the conversation with intention.And in Part 2, we go deeper into these patterns and show you how to shift them into more effective, connected communication + we'll share the worksheet we refer to at the end!Show Resources:Looking for community? Join our Let's Talk Polyamory private Facebook group - ⁠https://www.facebook.com/groups/letstalkpoly⁠New and looking to build a secure foundation including how to effectively communicate with your partners? Our Poly Newbies Digital Course is for you! Get it for only $97 for a limited time for our listeners- https://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiesspecialoffer Looking for therapy?  Arrange a complimentary therapy consultation with André at ⁠https://book.a-psych-online.com/therapyconsultation⁠ Book a complimentary coaching consultation call with Tara at: ⁠⁠https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue⁠⁠

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    80: Traveling When Non-Monogamous: What to Know Before You Go

    Planning a trip and your'e non-monogamous?Traveling comes with its own unique dynamics and things to plan for, whether you're heading out on a solo adventure or exploring with a partner or partners. In this episode, we dive into what that really looks like, and how those experiences can expand not just your world, but your relationships too.We talk about:Traveling together vs. taking solo vacationsHow (and where) you might meet people while awayWhat happens when you do meet someone you likeThe conversations and agreements that matter, before and during your tripHow boundaries, expectations, and connection can shift when you're out of your normal environmentWe also share our personal experiences and practical insights around communication, honesty, safety, and staying grounded in your relationships, no matter where you are in the world.And of course, how we make traveling fun—because yes, you can have adventure and emotional security.✈️ Your action list if you're planning travel:Practice honest communication about travel plans and personal boundariesGet clear on agreements, especially if they may shift while you're awayPrioritize safety and STI testing when meeting new partnersStay open to spontaneity while staying aligned with your valuesMake space for both connection and independenceShow Resources:We love travelling using Home Exchange as it allows us to travel economically and stay in amazing places in exchange for our home - use this link to get 250 bonus points when you sign up (that's a 2 night stay in most places - ⁠https://www.homeexchange.com/?sponsorkey=taraandandre-cbef0 ⁠Looking for community? Join our Let's Talk Polyamory private Facebook group - ⁠https://www.facebook.com/groups/letstalkpoly⁠New and looking to build a secure foundation? Our Poly Newbies Digital Course is for you! Get it for only $97 for a limited time for our listeners- https://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiesspecialoffer Want to learn more about travel - Check out our episode we recorded while on our East Coast road trip: Carversations: Travelling When Polyamorous or Open - https://open.spotify.com/episode/5KIL4RSyr4T7sZymJLjxbD?si=mZsxR5oiSyCE2iZRSIcTNA 

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    79: Lifestyle Lingo

    Ever feel like the lifestyle has its own language? Well… you’re not wrong.In this bonus T&A Alphabet Series episode, we’re breaking down some of the most common and less common terms used in swinging and the lifestyle, including:What “the lifestyle” actually means—and the different names people use (like libertine)Common roles and dynamics (hotwife, stag/vixen, unicorn, bull, OPP)Types of play and what they involve (soft swap, hard swap, same room play)Events, parties, and how people connectConsent, communication, and safety language (hard & soft limits, full consent culture, aftercare)Sexual and other terms (voyeur, DP, bukkake, “take one for the team”)All of this is designed to help you feel more confident and informed as you explore—whether you’re brand new or already have some experience.And as we’ve said throughout this series, it’s always important to ask people what their definitions are—because these terms can mean different things to different people.Show Resources:Contribute to our T&A Sex Clubs, Lifestyle Destinations & Communities Around the World List - https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1t8DzYsOJSQ0g1cboAuBl_ibFYQGwpHoiEO-JdriKUjA/edit?usp=sharingLooking for therapy?  Arrange a complimentary therapy consultation with André at ⁠⁠https://book.a-psych-online.com/therapyconsultation⁠⁠ Book a complimentary coaching consultation call with Tara at: ⁠⁠⁠https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue⁠⁠⁠Poly Newbies Digital Course Listener Offer -  ⁠https://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiesspecialoffer⁠The Little Book of Poly Love 💖 Join the waitlist to be the first to know when it’s published and pops into the world: ⁠⁠https://go.letstalkpolyamory.com/polylovebook-waitlist⁠⁠Episode 69: Consent is Sexy: Why Enthusiastic Consent is so Important - https://open.spotify.com/episode/2RzCDuhK9yMM3GgkU5ebPg?si=ObHEGONiTCyFgCF6Q-oo7g  Episode 64: K is for KINK, Kitchen Table Polyamory & Kissing - https://open.spotify.com/episode/7FOrTjvfhxOB2Il9BLoNwc?si=GdwcjFa1Sn-qWcg2Ikspgw Unicorns & Unicorn Hunting: Can it be Ethical? https://open.spotify.com/episode/5TI3NNE3H5JxlwzopWqM1Z?si=hRQsZ47bQASGDRf3KDCnFg

  5. 78

    S is For Everything You Wanted to Know About Sexual Issues But Were Afraid to Ask!

    We are back with another instalment of our T&A Alphabet Series and this one is all about the letter S!We give you: S is For Everything You Wanted to Know About Sexual Issues But Were Afraid to Ask!Sexual issues are something so many people experience—but few people actually talk about.In this episode, we open up the conversation around sex, desire, identity, and connection—sharing both insights and our own real-life experiences along the way.We cover:✨ What sexual apathy actually is—and why low desire isn’t always a problem ✨ The many emotional, physical, and relational factors that can impact sex drive ✨ Desire discrepancies in relationships and how to navigate them collaboratively ✨ The spectrum of sexual identity, orientation, and expression ✨ Why sexual health matters ✨ Common causes of sexual anxiety and how communication can shift everythingSexuality isn’t one-size-fits-all—it exists on a spectrum, and what feels right will look different for everyone.As always, we come back to one of the most powerful tools in any relationship:💬 Talk about it.Open, honest communication—with your partners and with professionals—can change everything.If something in this episode resonates with you and you want support navigating it, you’re always welcome to reach out. We’re here to help you take your next step. Links below to connect.Show Resources:Looking for therapy?  Arrange a complimentary therapy consultation with André at ⁠⁠https://book.a-psych-online.com/therapyconsultation⁠⁠ Book a complimentary coaching consultation call with Tara at: ⁠⁠⁠https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue⁠⁠⁠The Cervix Wand - for vaginal de-armoring and anal massage, cervical and g-spot stimulation.  ⁠https://waands.com/products/cervix-wand?ref=taraandandre⁠ - use code TARALYNNEFRANCO to get 10% off or use this link for any item in the store - ⁠https://waands.com/discount/TARALYNNEFRANCO?ref=taraandandre⁠Poly Newbies Digital Course Listener Offer -  ⁠https://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiesspecialoffer⁠The Little Book of Poly Love 💖 Join the waitlist to be the first to know when it’s published and pops into the world: ⁠⁠https://go.letstalkpolyamory.com/polylovebook-waitlist⁠

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    77: Let’s Talk About Sex (When We’re Not Having It or Enough of It)

    Salt-N-Pepa had it right in 1990…“Let’s talk about sex baby, let's talk about you and me, let's talk about all the good things and the bad things that may be…”It’s also important to talk about sex when we’re not having it — or not having enough of it.This episode explores the complexities of mismatched sex drives in relationships, and why the difference itself is often less of a problem than the meaning couples attach to it. From our own experiences and the work we’ve done with clients, we share three things we know to be true:People have different sex drives and desires for intimacyThe difference itself usually isn’t the problem — it’s how couples interpret itTalking about it gives the relationship a much better chanceWhen partners want different amounts of sex, it can quickly lead to resentment, pressure, and painful assumptions about attraction, love, and unmet needs. In this conversation, we explore how these dynamics develop and why communication, understanding, and creative solutions are essential for maintaining intimacy and connection.We also get personal, sharing how differences in desire show up in our own relationship — including how menopause and pain have impacted Tara’s desire and what she’s been exploring to navigate that. Along the way, we discuss concepts like responsive desire and how understanding different desire styles can shift the conversation.We also share practical tools and conversation approaches couples can use to move away from the blame game and toward solutions that honour both partners’ needs — whether they’re in monogamous or non-monogamous relationships.Chapters:00:00 - Understanding Different Sex Drives02:42 - Navigating Relationship Dynamics05:29 - The Importance of Communication08:22 - Resentment and Its Roots11:12 - The Role of Internal Narratives13:59 - Breaking the Silence on Sex16:44 - Building Trust Through Open Dialogue22:52 - Exploring Non-Monogamy as a Solution25:14 - The Importance of Communication in Relationships26:18 - Redefining Intimacy Beyond Sex28:04 - Tools for Reestablishing Intimacy30:35 - Understanding Desire Styles34:29 - Finding Solutions Together38:47 - Final Thoughts on Navigating Desire DifferencesShow Resources:Episode: Can an Open Relationship Save My Marriage - https://open.spotify.com/episode/7o3meUcbbNdcfb4S1I7vbq?si=vT-9MhXkSDGgS-0mnbgFQw The Cervix Wand - for vaginal de-armoring and anal massage, cervical and g-spot stimulation.  https://waands.com/products/cervix-wand?ref=taraandandre - use code TARALYNNEFRANCO to get 10% off or use this link for any item in the store - https://waands.com/discount/TARALYNNEFRANCO?ref=taraandandreLooking for therapy?  Arrange a complimentary therapy consultation with André at ⁠https://book.a-psych-online.com/therapyconsultation⁠ Book a complimentary coaching consultation call with Tara at: ⁠⁠https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue⁠⁠Poly Newbies Digital Course Listener Offer -  https://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiesspecialoffer

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    76: R is for Really Great Relationship, Sex and Polyamory R-Words

    We’re back with another episode of our T&A Alphabet Series!This is an all-new episode on the letter R — and you’re REALLY going to REVEL in this jam-packed conversation.We’re covering a range of relationship, sex and polyamory/non-monogamy terms grouped into three themes:Relationships & relationship structuresSexual and erotic termsEmotional and psychological termsIt’s a truly robust episode filled with really helpful R words like:Relationship Anarchy (RA)Relationship EscalatorReciprocityRimmingRadical HonestyReassuranceRepairResentmentWe cover over 20 different words — with deeper dives into topics like relationship agreements and relationship reviews using the RAADAR method, rope play (Shibari), and responsive desire.Get ready for a rich, reflective, and maybe even a little risqué ride through the Rs.Many of the words we explore here (and throughout our T&A Alphabet Series) are also part of our upcoming project, The Little Book of Poly Love 💖 Join the waitlist to be the first to know when it’s published and pops into the world: ⁠https://go.letstalkpolyamory.com/polylovebook-waitlist⁠Show Resources:Rich Relationships: Building Your Million Dollar Network. Book by Selena Soo - Looking for therapy?  Arrange a complimentary therapy consultation with André at ⁠https://book.a-psych-online.com/therapyconsultation⁠ Book a complimentary coaching consultation call with Tara at: ⁠⁠https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue⁠⁠Poly Newbies Digital Course Listener Offer -  https://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiesspecialoffer

  8. 75

    75: Q is For Queer: Understanding Queer Identity

    We’re back with another episode of our T&A Alphabet Series! Many earlier episodes were originally delivered as live trainings inside our Let’s Talk Polyamory Podcast private Facebook community. In this episode, recorded in 2021, we dive into the letter Q — Queer — exploring identity, fluidity, heteronormativity, mononormativity, intersectionality, visibility, mental health, and the intersection of queerness and consensual non-monogamy.We talk about definitions of queer, how marginalization can impact mental health, and common misconceptions about being queer and polyamorous. We also share some statistics—though at the time of recording, specific data on people identifying as “queer” was limited.We share our personal experiences with queerness: what it was like growing up, coming to queer identity later in life, and how our relationship has opened us to limitless sexual and emotional expression. Tara shares her journey coming out to family as queer and dating a woman before embracing polyamory, and André shares his experiences with family and how the reactions varied.We also invite your reflections in the comments:Is queer a term you identify with?What does being queer mean to you?Why is it important to identify as queer?If you identify as queer or another non-heterosexual or non-monogamous identity, are you out and open about it?Note: We did our best with the video and audio quality, but it isn’t perfect. As we felt the content is worth sharing, we're sharing it anyway!Chapters00:00 - Introduction 00:35 - Exploring the Term 'Queer'02:37 - Personal Identities and Experiences with Queerness07:10 - Definitions and Understanding of Queerness10:48 - Navigating Heteronormativity and Mononormativity15:04 - Reflections on Coming Out and Self-Identification19:21 - Redefining Queerness: Beyond Labels26:42 - Intersectionality and Mental Health in the LGBTQ+ Community30:08 - Navigating Polyamory and Queerness31:00 - Coming Out Stories: Personal Experiences and Family DynamicsResources:Looking for therapy?  Arrange a complimentary therapy consultation with André at ⁠https://book.a-psych-online.com/therapyconsultation⁠ Book a complimentary coaching consultation call with Tara at: ⁠⁠https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue⁠⁠Book: Bi Notes for a Bisexual Revolution by Shiri Eisner - https://www.amazon.ca/Bi-Bisexual-Revolution-Shiri-Eisner/dp/1580054749Coming out as polyamorous video - our initial talk in preparing for the conversation - How to talk to parents about being polyamorous or in an open relationship - https://youtu.be/UxYecGOZ3WY?si=OaNmNcBea2bA27sH Let's Talk Polyamory Facebook Community - https://www.facebook.com/groups/letstalkpoly Poly Newbies Digital Course Listener Offer -  https://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiesspecialoffer

  9. 74

    74: P is for Polyamory and a Plethora of P Words

    We’re back with another playful, passionate, and slightly provocative instalment of our much-loved T&A Alphabet Series!These episodes originally began as live trainings inside our Let’s Talk Polyamory private Facebook community, and this one has been freshly updated and pleasantly packed just for you.In this episode, we dive  playfully into the letter P — and as the title suggests, it’s not just about polyamory. Oh no. It’s a plentiful, punchy, and sometimes polarizing collection of P words that show up in conversations about relationships, sex, and non-monogamy.Here’s a taste of what we cover:PolyamoryPolysaturatedPolygamy & PolyandryPower dynamicsPrimary partnerPansexualParaphiliaAnd if you patiently persevere to the end… the sexiest P words make an appearance too 🔥Think PIV, promiscuity, period sex, and more.Preparing for this episode was pure pleasure given the practically limitless P words we could have covered. Not all of them made it into the podcast — so yes, this episode is “just the tip.” 😏Many of the words we explore here (and throughout our T&A Alphabet Series) are also part of our upcoming project, The Little Book of Poly Love 💖 Join the waitlist to be the first to know when it’s published and pops into the world:https://go.letstalkpolyamory.com/polylovebook-waitlist📖 Chapters00:00 Introduction to Polyamory and P Words01:30 Understanding Polyamory and Its Types03:18 Exploring Polyfidelity and Polycules06:02 Defining Poly Intimates and Polysaturation08:06 Polyamory Under Duress09:52 Primary Partners and Power Dynamics13:50 Pansexuality and Paraphilia Explained15:54 Passive Aggressive and Direct16:46 Sexual Terms: PIV, PIA, and PIM17:41 Promiscuity: Gender Perspectives and Cultural Views20:14 Play and Period Sex: Breaking Taboos23:36 The P-Spot and Male PleasureShow Resources:Poly Newbies Digital Course – Listener OfferA practical, supportive place for the poly-curious, poly-new, and poly-questioninghttps://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiesspecialofferLooking for therapy?Arrange a complimentary therapy consultation with André:https://book.a-psych-online.com/therapyconsultationWant personalized coaching support?Book a complimentary coaching consultation with Tara:https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue

  10. 73

    73: Am I Still Polyamorous (Even If I'm Not Actively "Practicing" It)?

    Welcome to Season 3! We’re so excited to be back with a brand new season filled with all the conversations you love — and more.This season, we’ll be continuing our T&A Alphabet Series with episodes dropping throughout the year, and we’ll also be welcoming new guests to the podcast. If you’d like to be a guest, or know someone who would be a great fit, we’d love to hear from you.The idea for this episode emerged while we were in Mexico over the holidays, where we found ourselves revisiting a question we return to often: Can someone still be polyamorous — an identity we both hold — even when they’re not actively “practicing” it?In this episode, we explore the evolving nature of polyamory as both an identity and a practice. We reflect on our recent experiences with dating and not dating, what has shifted in our personal and professional lives, and how our priorities continue to change over time.André also shares about a recent connection with someone who does not identify as non-monogamous, including what it was like to navigate that experience (spoiler alert: it's been very positive), how it felt to share it with Tara, and the real-time conversations that followed. Tara reflects on her own experience of learning that André was feeling new relationship energy (NRE), and what that brought up for her.Along the way, we dive into the importance of communication when navigating new connections, explore NRE in long-term relationships, and discuss the values that underpin polyamory / non-monogamy as a relational identity. We also share listener reflections around identity, values, and how these ideas show up in different seasons of life.This conversation emphasizes that identifying as polyamorous can remain true even during phases of less active dating, and invites listeners to reflect on their own relational identities, values, and intentions for the future.Chapters00:00: Welcome to Season Three01:31: Reflections on Identity and Polyamory04:47: Exploring Relational Identity07:24: Navigating New Relationships10:08: The Dynamics of Non-Monogamy12:53: Understanding New Relationship Energy15:32: Balancing Relationships and Personal Growth18:07: Navigating Non-Monogamy: Embracing Other Connections21:38: Defining Polyamory: Identity vs. Practice25:15:The Emotional Landscape of Polyamory28:08: Polyamory as an Evolving Identity31:51: Listener suggested reflectionsShow Resources:Contact Us via the form on our website - https://www.taraandandre.com/#section-udHUURtgCyNight Thoughts - Reflections of a Sex Therapist, by Dr. Avodah Offit - https://www.indigo.ca/en-ca/night-thoughts-reflections-of-a-sex-therapist/9781568214580.html Poly Newbies Digital Course Listener Offer -  https://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiesspecialofferLooking for therapy?  Arrange a complimentary therapy consultation with André at ⁠https://book.a-psych-online.com/therapyconsultation⁠ Book a complimentary coaching consultation call with Tara at: ⁠⁠https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue⁠⁠

  11. 72

    72: O is for Open Relating, Orgasms, Oral and Other Ohs…

    We’re back with another juicy instalment of our T&A Alphabet Series! Many of these episodes began as live trainings inside our Let’s Talk Polyamory private Facebook community, and this one has been freshly re-recorded, updated, and expanded just for you.In this episode, we dive into the letter O — and yes, we save the biggest O for last 😉O is for Open Relating, Orgasms, Oral, and Other Ohs…We explore a wide range of O topics while providing thoughtful insights into each one, with a strong emphasis on consent, communication, and understanding. Along the way, we share personal experiences and offer practical, real-world advice to help you deepen intimacy, navigate complexity, and enhance pleasure in your relationships in ways that feel aligned and sustainable.This episode covers:Open Relating – what it really means in practiceOrgies – including consent in group settingsOut & Outed – navigating visibility, disclosure, and choiceObligations – exploring both external expectations and self-imposed pressureOral & Outercourse – expanding pleasure beyond penetration and performanceAnd finally, our perfectly timed CLIMAX: ORGASMS ✨We talk about what orgasms actually are, different types of orgasms, what happens in the body when we orgasm, facts and myths, faking it, common challenges, and what you can do to increase pleasure — with or without orgasm as the goal.Equal parts educational, playful, and grounding, this episode supports listeners who are exploring relationship dynamics, strengthening intimacy, or simply wanting better conversations about sex, pleasure, and connection.📖 Episode Chapters:00:00 Introduction and Episode Overview02:22 Open Relating Definition03:10 Orgies & Consent04:48 Being Out and Outed 09:08 Understanding Obligations in Relationships09:55 Oral Sex 12:37 Outer Course 14:46 Understanding Orgasms & The Types of Orgasms20:56 What Happens to Your Brain & Body During Orgasm24:23 Studies and Facts about Orgasms30:22 Faking It34:00 Techniques for Enhancing Pleasure 37:58 Sensate Focus and Intimacy 39:45 The Importance Self-Exploration & Masterbation42:08 Conclusion and Call to ActionShow Resources:Poly Newbies Digital Course Listener Offer -  https://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiesspecialofferLooking for therapy?  Arrange a complimentary therapy consultation with André at ⁠https://book.a-psych-online.com/therapyconsultation⁠ Book a complimentary coaching consultation call with Tara at: ⁠⁠https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue⁠⁠C is for Consensual Non-Monogamy episode - https://open.spotify.com/episode/4QjdNH6LdaYqOgFaaFMqja?si=FBh6ICbDQB-Fgo9SUd6jhA How We Love:  What Style of Non-Monogamy is for Me? https://open.spotify.com/episode/2wQiiMrHCFltYorI7bdEGs?si=2rVxqTliScODBUqIJ4TuMA What Style of Non-Monogamy is for Me Free Worksheet - https://worksheet.letstalkpolyamory.com/cnmstyle Why Enthusiastic Consent is So Important - https://open.spotify.com/episode/2RzCDuhK9yMM3GgkU5ebPg?si=C87tjthIRY2Ro8KANTnE_w A is for Anorgasmia Episode - https://open.spotify.com/episode/1oBt1yFEfFsnCUGzTRmF8p?si=Nyjkx7KeRc6YZns0wxdjKQ How to Talk to Family About Being Polyamorous - Tara & Andre preparing for Tara’s coming out to parents - https://youtu.be/UxYecGOZ3WY?si=VzvgfmS8SSuuufqB 3 Minute Game - https://www.schoolofconsent.org/blog/3-minute-game Sensate Focus Article - https://www.smsna.org/patients/did-you-know/what-is-sensate-focus-and-how-does-it-work 

  12. 71

    71: N is for the Nine N Words You Need to Know

    We’re back with another episode in our T&A Alphabet Series! Many earlier episodes were originally delivered as live trainings inside our Let’s Talk Polyamory private Facebook community. This one is a freshly re-recorded instalment — updated, expanded, and shaped by listener requests. In this episode we are diving into the letter N with The Nine N Words You Need to Know!We explore key “N” words that often come up in non-monogamous relationships. We talk about non-negotiables, the meaning and impact of names and titles, necrophilia, and neediness in relationships—when it can be a call for support and when it might negatively impact the connection. We also cover nesting partners, the importance of the word no and recognizing both verbal and body-language cues, and what it looks like to normalize non-monogamy in everyday life. Plus, we touch on numbers (a.k.a. body count of sexual partners) and nudism, and why these conversations matter.This is a fun, thoughtful, and wide-ranging episode we know you’ll enjoy!Want to hear T&A live? Join them on December 10, 2025 for Reconnect Wednesday at the Mermaid Lounge just outside Toronto. Information about the Mermaid Lounge at https://mermaidlounge.ca/. Tickets at https://thexclub.net/event_description.php?event=452. 📖 Episode Chapters:00:00 - Introduction 01:38 - Exploring Non-Negotiables in Relationships03:56-  Names and Titles in Non-Monogamous Relationships05:46 - Understanding Necrophilia 10:30 - Navigating Neediness 12:11 - Nesting & Nesting Partners13:08  - Nipples and Nipple Play15:45 - No when shared verbally or through body language17:53 Normalization of Non-Monogamy21:21 Nudism and Naturism24:25 Discussing Numbers in RelationshipsShow Resources:Join the waitlist and be the first to find out when our Little Book of Poly Love is out with all the HOT words from A-Z! ⁠⁠https://go.letstalkpolyamory.com/polylovebook-waitlist⁠Necrophilia image and article - https://www.vice.com/en/article/yvxem5/the-little-death-living-and-loving-as-a-necrophiliac-51Relationship Burnout: How to Make LRE Feel Like NRE Again podcast episode - https://open.spotify.com/episode/3Ujeot4xkUKWwZCPClzVDt?si=T0BytQblSUGqLyiqj7494Q Consent is Sexy: Why Enthusiastic Consent is So Important podcast episode - https://open.spotify.com/episode/2RzCDuhK9yMM3GgkU5ebPg?si=cg7CPN_yTXSkmTlsRchq0w Poly Newbies Digital Course Listener Offer -  https://courses.letstalkpolyamLooking for therapy?  Arrange a complimentary therapy consultation with Andre at ⁠https://book.a-psych-online.com/therapyconsultation⁠ or book a complimentary coaching consultation call with Tara at: ⁠⁠https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue⁠⁠Let’s Talk Polyamory Facebook Group & Community - ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/groups/letstalkpoly⁠⁠⁠

  13. 70

    70: M is for the 5 Ways to Make Sure Your COMMUNICATION is not MISCOMMUNICATION

    We’re back with another episode of our T&A Alphabet Series!These episodes were originally delivered as live trainings on Mondays inside our Let’s Talk Polyamory private Facebook community, and over the last few months we’ve been uploading them to all major podcast platforms.Today’s episode is all about the letter M — and it’s a good one.We’re diving into: M is for the 5 Ways to Make Sure Your COMMUNICATION Isn’t MISCOMMUNICATION.In this episode, we explore:The core components of successful communication.How to break old or unhelpful communication habits and replace them with patterns that actually work.Why getting “heated” or “upset” is valuable information — uncomfortable, yes, but often pointing us toward something meaningful to unpack after the moment passes.Active listening: how to become better listeners and how to recognize when we aren’t.Communication models we love, including the Interactional Model.Practical, real-life examples of how to become a clearer, more effective communicator.How to approach more challenging conversations and invite true dialogue.The importance of being clear, honest, and direct.What happens when we hold things in instead of expressing them.How trust and rapport are built through communication.How your beliefs, interpretations, and assumptions shape the way you show up in conversation.Progressive Communication: what it is, and how to use it to move conversations forward instead of repeating the same loops.What to do when someone comes into a conversation already feeling defensive.And how to use “breaks” effectively.We also share an analogy that highlights the difference between genuine communication and miscommunication, plus a personal example of a moment between us where emotions were high and things got a little “heated” — and what we learned from it.Want to hear T&A live?Join us on December 10, 2025 for Reconnect Wednesday at the Mermaid Lounge just outside Toronto. Learn more about the Mermaid Lounge at mermaidlounge.ca. Grab tickets at thexclub.net/event_description.php?event=452Show Resources:Feeld Dating Site - https://feeld.co/ Dr. Amy Corey - Evolution of Human Communication - From Theory to Practice - article - https://www.scribd.com/document/535619793/Communication-By-Dr-Amy-M-CoreyLooking for support working through your communication patterns or other issues?  Arrange a complimentary therapy consultation with André at ⁠https://book.a-psych-online.com/therapyconsultation⁠ or book a complimentary coaching consultation call with Tara at: ⁠⁠https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue⁠⁠Let’s Talk Polyamory Facebook Group & Community - ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/groups/letstalkpoly⁠⁠⁠

  14. 69

    69: Consent is Sexy: Why Enthusiastic Consent Is So Important

    Consent isn’t just about saying yes or no, it is much more complex than that. In this episode, Tara and André discuss and explore the nuances of consent in intimate interactions, emphasizing that consent is not a one-time agreement but an active, ongoing conversation that involves both people every step of the way.They unpack what enthusiastic consent really means, how it plays out in different settings like dates, parties, and clubs, and why the idea of “ongoing consent” or “ask once” don’t apply. Instead, consent is a living, dynamic process — one that deepens trust, connection, and genuine desire. And each person plays an active role and responsibility  in ensuring mutual comfort.You’ll also hear about some of the most common frameworks used to understand consent — from FRIES (Freely given, Reversible, Informed, Enthusiastic, Specific, developed by Planned Parenthood) and CRISP (Considered, Reversible, Informed Specific, Participant) to frameworks used in the kink community such as  SSC (Safe, Sane, Consensual) and RACK (Risk-Aware Consensual Kink). As well as the Yes, No, Maybe List. Each of these helps shape awareness, yet none replace real-time communication.Tara and André share examples of what consent can sound like in the moment even in non-sexual environments - for example a recent example where Tara asked someone - Would you be open to me giving you a compliment?”, why asking builds connection rather than killing the mood, and how saying — or hearing — a clear no can be just as sexy as an enthusiastic yes.And finally they talk about consent and law.This conversation reminds us that consent is the heartbeat of healthy intimacy — an evolving, mutual agreement that requires awareness, communication, and care.Want to hear T&A live? Join them on December 10, 2025 for Reconnect Wednesday at the Mermaid Lounge just outside Toronto. Information about the Mermaid Lounge at https://mermaidlounge.ca/. Tickets at https://thexclub.net/event_description.php?event=452. 📖 Episode Chapters:3:07 Understanding Consent6:07 Ongoing Consent: Myths & Realities12:21 Consent Frameworks23:14 The Nuances of Consent34:25 Navigating Compliments & Consent40:20 Consent in Different Scenarios55:50 The Legal Landscape of ConsentShow Resources:K is for Kink, Kitchen Table Polyamory, Kissing + Other K Words Episode - https://open.spotify.com/episode/7FOrTjvfhxOB2Il9BLoNwc?si=ihdSbNg2RSaxlE24TjOPgA Cup of Team Consent Video - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oQbei5JGiT8 Poly Newbies Digital Course Listener Offer -  ⁠https://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiesspecialoffer⁠Looking for therapy or coaching?  Arrange a complimentary therapy consultation with André at ⁠https://book.a-psych-online.com/therapyconsultation⁠ or book a complimentary coaching consultation call with Tara at: ⁠⁠https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue⁠⁠Let’s Talk Polyamory Facebook Group & Community - ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/groups/letstalkpoly⁠⁠⁠

  15. 68

    68: Sex & Lifestyle Clubs 101: What to Expect and How to Prepare (Live from the Mermaid Lounge)

    Ever wondered what it’s really like to go to a sex or lifestyle club for the first time — and what to do to prepare? Or maybe you’ve been before and the experience wasn’t what you hoped?In this special episode Tara is live on location at the Mermaid Lounge just outside Toronto, Ontario, joined by Event Host Amy,!Together, they explore what to expect when visiting a lifestyle space — from atmosphere and etiquette to safety, consent, and connection.You’ll get an insider tour of the newly renovated Mermaid Lounge and adjoining X-Club and hear practical guidance for what to do before, during, and after your visit to spaces like these so the experience feels positive, secure, and aligned with your personal values and boundaries.Included in this discussion is how to plan before the event with a partner — including what scenarios you’re open to exploring and how you’ll check-in throughout the visit and communicate if one of you feels uncomfortable or needs support once you’re there. Even with the best planning, emotions can arise, so having a shared plan for navigating them helps everyone feel safe and connected.Whether you’re curious, nervous, or simply exploring new sides of your sexuality, this episode will help you feel prepared and confident.🎧 Tune in for:A guided tour of the Mermaid LoungeTips for your first (or next) lifestyle club experienceConsent, communication, and aftercare insightsHow to plan ahead, check in, and debrief after attendingDetails on T&A’s live talk on December 10: The 7-Step Securely Non-Monogamous FrameworkShow Resources:Mermaid Lounge hours, facilities, tickets and info available at: https://mermaidlounge.ca/Join us for our LIVE Talk December 10 for Reconnect Wednesday - info & Tickets at: -https://www.thexclub.net/event_description.php?event=452 Podcast Episode: H is for Sexual Health & Hair: https://open.spotify.com/episode/7nOEQfbBcH8EXx1XItHdKF?si=wAnUraOnQAKffvD8kkXCKw Podcast Episode: STI Testing and Acceptable Risk - https://open.spotify.com/episode/2qjpsoc3tY2Ea1lE4yaLVE?si=JqmlxdQ4QLW2eZVvSbNRWwAdd clubs you've visited to T&A's Sex Clubs and Destinations Around the World List - https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1t8DzYsOJSQ0g1cboAuBl_ibFYQGwpHoiEO-JdriKUjA/edit?usp=sharing

  16. 67

    67: Breaking Taboos in Sex & Relationships - Part 2

    In Part 2 we continue our deep dive into the complex world of sex, relationships, and the taboos that shape them. We explore what makes certain topics so charged, how our personal experiences influence what we consider “off-limits,” and why breaking taboos can lead to more honest and connected relationships.💬 In this episode:What Are the Biggest Taboos Around Sex & Relationships? We examine the issues people still hesitate to talk about — and how these silences affect connection and trust.Personal Perspectives on Breaking Taboos - we share our own stories on what it means to confront stigma, challenge assumptions, and choose openness over secrecy.Community Reflections - Drawing from listener and community feedback, we discuss the taboos that continue perpetuate — and why some conversations still feel risky to have, even in open-minded circles.Why is Breaking Taboos Important ? Finally we explore why taboos should be broken and whether some taboos might serve a purpose — creating mystery, excitement, or deeper meaning — and how to balance curiosity with respect, consent, and intention.It’s a thoughtful, candid conversation about where our edges come from, how they evolve, and why it’s worth questioning them in pursuit of deeper authenticity and connection.✨ Catch us live!We will be at Booth 322 at the Toronto Taboo Show, October 17–19, 2025. We will be giving seminars Friday at 6:30 PM and Saturday at 8:30 PM on Non-Monogamy Essentials: Making it Secure, Satisfying, and Sexy!📖 Episode Chapters:00:00 — Breaking Taboos in Sex and Relationships05:20 — Exploring Non-Monogamy and Its Misunderstandings10:48 — Personal Experiences with Sexuality and Openness16:37 — Addressing Common Taboos and Myths in Non-Monogamy25:08 — Navigating Relationship Taboos29:14 — The Complexity of Secret Partners31:55 — Reprioritizing Partners in Non-Monogamy36:21 — Challenging Myths About Polyamory38:58 — Sexual Health and Multiple Partners40:40 — Consent and Altered States41:43 — The Pressure of “Best” Sex44:11 — The Importance of Breaking TaboosShow Resources:Taboo Show - https://tabooshow.com/ Me B4 We Intimacy Coaching - https://linktr.ee/meb4wePoly Newbies Digital Course Listener Offer -  https://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiesspecialofferLooking for therapy?  Arrange a complimentary therapy consultation with Andre at https://book.a-psych-online.com/therapyconsultation or book a complimentary coaching consultation call with Tara at: ⁠https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue⁠Let’s Talk Polyamory Facebook Group & Community - ⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/groups/letstalkpoly⁠⁠⁠

  17. 66

    66: Breaking Taboos in Sex & Relationships - Part 1 - With Special Guest Darryl Rosengreen from the Taboo Show

    In this episode, Tara sits down with Darryl Rosengreen, VP of Marketing and Promotion—and one of the owners—of The Taboo Show, to explore breaking taboos in sex and relationships.Together, they talk about how events like The Taboo Show create safe, inclusive spaces for people to learn, explore, and get curious about sexuality, kink, and relationships. Tara and Darryl share how these environments can inspire conversations you may not have had before—or didn’t know how to start—and help normalize talking about sex, sexuality, and intimacy in fun and educational ways.💬 In this episode:Why breaking taboos helps create healthier, more open relationshipsHow exploring sexuality can spark new conversations and self-discoveryWhat to expect at The Taboo Show (and why it’s a safe, educational, and fun space)The importance of normalizing conversations about sex and relationships✨ Catch us live at Taboo!T&A will be at Booth 322 at the Toronto Taboo Show, October 17–19, 2025. We'll also be speaking on Friday at 6:30 PM and Saturday at 8:30 PM on Non-Monogamy Essentials: Making it Secure, Satisfying, and Sexy!🎟️ We’re also doing a draw for free tickets to the show! Enter at https://events.letstalkpolyamory.com/taboo2025draw  before October 12 for your chance to win.📖 Episode Chapters:00:00 — Introduction to Taboo Topics in Relationships03:46 — Exploring Taboos in Sex and Relationships07:56 — The Taboo Show Experience13:51 — Breaking Down Taboos Around Sex 16:46 — Advice for First-Time AttendeesShow Resources:Taboo Show - https://tabooshow.com/ Enter to WIN free tickets to the Toronto show -  https://events.letstalkpolyamory.com/taboo2025draw Me B4 We Intimacy Coaching - https://linktr.ee/meb4wePoly Newbies Digital Course Listener Offer -  https://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiesspecialofferLooking for therapy?  Arrange a complimentary therapy consultation with Andre at https://book.a-psych-online.com/therapyconsultationBook a complimentary coaching consultation call with Tara at: ⁠https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue⁠

  18. 65

    65: L is for Lube, Libido, Lingerie, Lifestyle, L’Amour + More

    We’re back with another episode in our T&A Alphabet Series—where we explore the big topics around non-monogamy, relationships, and sex, one letter at a time. These episodes were originally live trainings in our Let’s Talk Polyamory private Facebook group, and over the past year we’ve been releasing them onto podcast platforms.At the very start of Season 1, we shared L is for 5 Steps From Limitations to Liberation. Now, we’re circling back with a brand-new episode—because “L” deserves way more LOVE. In this episode, we dive into a lineup of L’s: Lube, Libido, Latex, Lingerie, Love, Lies, Lust vs. Longing, Layering, Lifestyle, Leather, and Labia.We take a playful and practical approach to breaking these down, sharing our own personal stories and examples from our work. You’ll hear why lube is a game-changer (at any age), what lingerie really means (and if men have it too), and how destructive communication like layering sneaks into relationships.We also dive deeper into libido and desire — what spontaneous vs. responsive desire actually looks like, how libido shifts over time, and what to do when there’s a mismatch in your relationship. Spoiler: it’s not all about “fixing” it — it’s about planning ahead, knowing mismatches are inevitable at some point, and building the communication skills to talk about it openly when it happens.Join us for a mix of humour, honesty, and depth in exploring love, sex, and polyamory!Show Resources:Episode 2: 5 Steps from Limitations to Liberation - https://open.spotify.com/episode/4f4lr2PWdpdVxfZmXGzcT2?si=JOYl2LeTSNmsCIhSIjaoLQ Taboo Show Toronto - Enter our draw to win a free pass - https://events.letstalkpolyamory.com/taboo2025draw - and find our more about the show at https://tabooshow.com/toronto Poly Newbies Digital Course Listener Offer -  https://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiesspecialofferLooking for therapy?  Arrange a complimentary therapy consultation with Andre at https://book.a-psych-online.com/therapyconsultation or book a complimentary coaching consultation call with Tara at: ⁠https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue⁠Let’s Talk Polyamory Facebook Group & Community - ⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/groups/letstalkpoly⁠⁠⁠

  19. 64

    64: K is for Kink, Kitchen Table Polyamory & Kissing + Other K Words

    We’re back with our T&A Alphabet Series! These episodes were originally live trainings in our Let’s Talk Polyamory private Facebook group. Over the last few months, we’ve been uploading them onto podcast platforms, but this time we’re bringing you a brand new episode.Today’s episode is all about the letter K! We bring you: K is for Kink, Kitchen Table Polyamory & Kissing + Other K WordsHere’s what we cover in this episode:Kink – what it is, common myths about it, how it differs from a fetish, where BDSM fits in, types of kink, and the importance of communication, consent and safetyKitchen Table Polyamory and why it isn’t the ideal or only way to do polyamoryKissing – including André’s story of being taught to “kiss like you’re eating a peach,” and how some relationships have rules around kissing and how to tell someone if you don’t like how someone kisses.Knights – not the armor-wearing kind, but staying the night or going on a vacation with another partner and how some specify where some people might have rules around where these overnights can happen.Kites & Strings – as a dynamic between two people (which we did a whole podcast on)Kuddling – when why & cuddling matters plus cuddle partiesKidversations – talking to kids about sex, identity, relationships and non-monogamy in a way that’s open but also age-appropriate so that they can be safe and consent.Kama Sutra - the art of living and loving well, and not just a sexual gymnastics manualAnd a few others! We also slide in some other topics like vetos, consent, communication,  poly-saturated, metamours and more!What did we miss? Let us know in the comments!✨ Bonus: We’re also linking our original K is for Kink talk in the show notes, where we go much deeper into all things kink, including how to get started if you’re curious.Want more? Sign up to be the first to know when our Little Book of Poly Love is released—a pocket-sized guide to the words and wisdom that make relationships work. https://go.letstalkpolyamory.com/polylovebook-waitlist⁠⁠Show Resources:K is for Kink YouTube Talk with Patric - https://www.youtube.com/live/2_v8nPMRa5c?si=AB1633gUoKiWtMW_BDSM Checklist - Do not complete this form! This is an example only - https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSfGEjHQBWLCqFQB2oAJZuzkjIlBuXyUX2xf-TVIAWQZOU5juQ/viewform?usp=sharing&ouid=103121892334923731334 BDSM Test - https://bdsmtest.org/select-lang Episode 28: Kites and Strings: Relationship Roles and Dynamics in Non-Monogamy - https://open.spotify.com/episode/4rDUwXR9jkwxUDMDBXusF7?si=xSvL6lh4Qfi4hqgT44o1xgEpisode 33: What to Say? How to Talk to Kids About Non-Monogamy, Sex, Kink and Other Stuff with Ms. Ashley Robertson -  https://open.spotify.com/episode/4mNuk3UkfqUJGWV79BnA4S?si=g8oCKb5rS6KdIqzdQXWVJw FetLife Social Network for the BDSM, Fetish & Kinky Community - https://fetlife.com/Oasis Aqualounge Sex Club Toronto - https://oasisaqualounge.com/ Taboo: Everything to Do About Sex Show Toronto - https://tabooshow.com/toronto Complete this form to be added to our mailing list - https://www.taraandandre.com/#section-udHUURtgCy Poly Newbies Digital Course Listener Offer -  https://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiesspecialofferLooking for therapy?  Arrange a complimentary therapy consultation with Andre at https://book.a-psych-online.com/therapyconsultation or book a complimentary coaching consultation call with Tara at: ⁠https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue⁠Let’s Talk Polyamory Facebook Group & Community - ⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/groups/letstalkpoly⁠⁠⁠

  20. 63

    63: Labels in Non-Monogamy: What’s Right (or Not) for Me?

    Do labels in non-monogamy give you clarity—or do they feel like a box you don’t want to fit into?Labels in non-monogamy—love them or hate them, they’re everywhere. For some people, labels bring clarity and a sense of belonging. For others, they feel restrictive or unnecessary. The truth? Whether labels are important is a personal choice.In this short but powerful episode from our Let’s Talk Polyamory Facebook group archives (saved before Facebook removed all group livestreams), we explore the role of labels in consensual non-monogamy and ask: What’s right for me?We start with the basics:✅ What do labels actually mean, and why do some people use them?✅ Introducing GSERD—Gender, Sexual, Erotic, Relational Diversity—as one way of identifying yourself.✅ A high-level overview of Jessica Fern’s Styles of Non-Monogamy diagram, which maps different relationship styles onto quadrants of high-to-low sexual and emotional exclusivity—and how you can use it to explore what feels right for you. (For a deeper dive into these styles, check out S1, Episode 7: How We Love: What Style of Non-Monogamy is Right for Me? episode.)From there, we talk about:✅ Deciding what labels (if any) align with your values and relationships✅ What you’d like your partners to call you—whether that’s boyfriend, girlfriend, boo, FWB, or something entirely your own✨ If you haven’t already, download our free worksheet—What Style of Consensual Non-Monogamy is Right for Me?—which includes Jessica Fern’s diagram and reflection prompts to help you map out your own place on the spectrum. Get it here: https://worksheet.letstalkpolyamory.com/cnmstyleOther Show Resources:All our 🔥 hot links: https://linktr.ee/Letstalkpolyamory Looking for therapy? Reach out to host André Turcotte and arrange a complimentary therapy consultation at https://book.a-psych-online.com/therapyconsultation or book a complimentary coaching consultation call with Tara at: ⁠https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue⁠ Let’s Talk Polyamory Facebook Group & Community - ⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/groups/letstalkpoly⁠⁠⁠Want to have wildly successful, secure and sexy non-monogamous relationships? Join us for the Poly Newbies Digital Course - https://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiesspecialofferWant more direct support from T&A, join us in Polyamory Mastery - https://go.taraandandre.com/polyamorymastery Poly Secure by Jessica Fern - https://www.jessicafern.com/books Let’s Talk Polyamory TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@letstalkpolyamory Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/taraandandre/ And in case you don’t know this famous comedian - here’s some info on Groucho Marx - https://www.biography.com/actors/groucho-marx 

  21. 62

    62: Carversations: Can Love Be Repaired

    We’re continuing our summer 🚗 road trip through the Gaspésie in Quebec and into the Maritime provinces—New Brunswick, Nova Scotia (including Cape Breton), and Prince Edward Island and it's been beyond what we ever imagined!We've discovered parts of 🇨🇦 Canada we hadn’t visited before, and, using the Home Exchange platform has not only saved us money ($0 for accommodations using points earned from others staying in our homes) but has allowed us to stay in some pretty awesome places and meet really great people along the way! Link in the the show resources to find out more and get a bonus 250pts when signing up!As we travel, we’re recording these bite-sized Carversations just for you!In this episode, we dive into a question that comes up often in relationships: Can love be repaired? We explore what conditions need to be present for real repair to happen—like willingness from both partners, acknowledgment of what has happened, and the ability to take responsibility for our part.We talk about how different factors may influence whether repair is possible: loss of trust or an egregious action, attachment styles, misaligned values, or differing visions for the future (such as whether or not to live together). We also dig into why “determination” alone isn’t enough, and how time—or even taking breaks—can sometimes play a role in the repair process (and yes, we have a healthy debate about this!). Along the way, we highlight the importance of reflection, honest communication, and taking concrete action toward change—not just talking about it.We’d love to hear from you, too—have you ever had to repair a relationship? What did you do, did it work (or not), and what advice would you share with others? Share your thoughts in the comments on this episode, answer the poll or join the discussion in our Let’s Talk Polyamory Facebook Group. We refer to our 36 Questions episode and recommend that you listen to it and download our free resources which both the original 36 questions plus our 36 additional ones. Links below.And if you’re in the middle of trying to repair a relationship and want support, we’ve got you covered:Book a therapy consultation call with André - ⁠https://book.a-psych-online.com/therapyconsultation⁠Book a Pay What You Can Coaching Call with Tara - https://go.taraandandre.com/pwyccoachingsession ⁠Since we were recording on the road, the sound isn’t studio-perfect—there was a bit of background noise and static we did our best to fix—but we hope you’ll still find this Carversation practical and helpful.Show Resources:Home Exchange Platform - use this link to get 250 bonus points when you sign up (that's a 2 night stay in most places - https://www.homeexchange.com/?sponsorkey=taraandandre-cbef0 Let's Talk Polyamory Facebook group - https://www.facebook.com/groups/letstalkpolyThe 36 Questions That May Lead to Love ... and the Other 36 To Stay in Love podcast episode - https://open.spotify.com/episode/02k2ogdF9gB98NFmdiAxVt?si=jn8VCJohRs2e2D2_DuUMmwDownload the 36 + 36 Questions Resource - https://worksheet.letstalkpolyamory.com/36plus36questionsFind out more about the services we offer + additional supports and resources that are available - https://www.taraandandre.com/

  22. 61

    61: Carversations: Road Trip Relationship Reviews & Check-Ins

    Sometimes the best place for a relationship check-in isn’t over coffee or at the kitchen table—it’s in the car, somewhere between snack stops and scenic views. 🚗✨We’re continuing our summer road trip through the Gaspésie in Quebec and into the Maritimes, and along the way we’re recording these bite-sized Carversations.In this episode, we share two different versions of relationship check-ins you can try, including the RAADAR Method—originally from the Multiamory Podcast but with our own extra “A”. RAADAR stands for Review, Agenda, Affirm & Connect (our add-on), Discussion, Actions, and Reconnect - a practice we teach to our clients and in our Poly Newbies Digital Course - which helps keep these reviews structured, connected, and productive.We also share a few easy starter questions you can use for your next road trip check-in, and we get personal by answering them ourselves:How are you feeling in the relationship right now?Any wins or highlights lately?Anything you’re struggling with or that needs more attention?Anything you’re excited about coming up?🎧 Heads up: This episode was recorded on the road, so you’ll hear a bit of “road trip ambiance” in the background—consider it part of the experience!💬 We’d love to hear your ideas!What questions do you love asking during check-ins?What topics are harder to discuss during check-insHave you tried the RAADAR Method?Got a road trip story that brought you closer to your partner(s)?Join the conversation in the episode comments or in our Let’s Talk Polyamory Facebook group.Show Resources:Poly Newbies Digital Course - https://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiesspecialoffer Want to connect with others who get it? Join our private Facebook group: 🔗 ⁠https://www.facebook.com/groups/letstalkpolyamory⁠Curious about Coaching? Sign up for a Pay What You Can Coaching Call with Tara at: ⁠https://go.taraandandre.com/pwyccoachingsession⁠ Looking for therapy? Book a complimentary therapy consultation with André Turcotte at ⁠https://book.a-psych-online.com/therapyconsultation⁠ You can also explore other ways to work with us as well as access other great resources at: ⁠https://www.taraandandre.com⁠Multiamory Podcast - https://www.multiamory.com/podcast

  23. 60

    60: Carversations: Travelling When Polyamorous or Open

    It’s summertime in 🇨🇦Canada, and we’re on a road trip adventure! Following the gorgeous Route 132 along the St. Lawrence in Gaspésie, Quebec, and winding our way into the Maritimes, we’re discovering more of this big, beautiful country… and, as we do we end up having plenty of short, topical chats from the car. Or as we like to call them—Carversations which we've decide to share with you!Our first Carversation? Travelling While Polyamorous or Openly Non-Monogamous!In this episode, we dive into:🚗 Choosing destinations that fit your vibe💖 Finding community wherever you roam🌈LGBTQIA+ travel⚡️ Doing your pre-trip research🧳 Solo poly travel tips🛠 Special travel considerations🔥General hot tips for any travel - like downloading Google offline maps + eSIM cards…and more!🎧 Heads up: This episode was recorded while driving, so you’ll hear a little road trip ambiance in the background. We used microphones and cleaned up the audio as much as possible—consider it part of the travel experience.In this episode we refer to our T&A Sex Clubs, Lifestyle Destinations and Communities Around the World—a community-sourced guide where you can add clubs or destinations you’ve visited, along with insider tips (think special features, facilities, or what makes them unique). If you’ve got a recommendation, we’d love to hear it!  You can also add local community groups or organizations that are poly-friendly! Link below!Show Resources:Poly Newbies Digital Course - https://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiesspecialoffer Want to connect with others who get it? Join our private Facebook group: 🔗 ⁠https://www.facebook.com/groups/letstalkpolyamory⁠SDC - Swinger Lifestyle Community online - connect with others, find events, and resources - https://www.sdc.com/signup.php?ref=37784Hedonism Jamaica - Adults-Only Lifestyle Resort - https://hedonism.com/ Cap D’Agde, France - Naturist Community - https://www.capdagde.com/ Hanlon’s Point Beach, Toronto Island - https://www.torontoisland.com/hanlans.php  T&A Sex Clubs, Lifestyle Destinations and Communities Around the World- https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1t8DzYsOJSQ0g1cboAuBl_ibFYQGwpHoiEO-JdriKUjA/edit?usp=sharing Saily eSIM - https://saily.com/ and use code TARACI4818 for $5 offLooking for therapy? Reach out to host André Turcotte and arrange a complimentary therapy consultation at ⁠https://book.a-psych-online.com/therapyconsultation⁠ or book a complimentary coaching consultation call with Tara at: ⁠⁠https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue⁠⁠

  24. 59

    59: How to Attract (And Keep) Better Poly Partners

    In this episode we’re digging into the archives to bring you a conversation that originally aired live in our Let’s Talk Polyamory private Facebook group. Since Facebook now only stores live videos for 30 days, we’re working behind the scenes to download and share some of those gems here on the podcast.In this episode, we dive into a question we hear all the time: How do I attract (and keep) better poly partners?Whether you’re new to non-monogamy or have been dating for a while, this episode is full of insight, real stories, and practical tools. We talk about: How we might be perceived on dating apps when we list “non-monogamous” in our profileThe (hilarious) story of our first date and what our initial reactions wereWe also share how our Securely Polyamorous Framework—which we teach in our course and coaching program—applies directly to dating and the process of meeting and keeping great partners. We explore things like communication attunement, knowing what you want, setting personal boundaries, creating values-based agreements and nurturing connections that are built to last.And if you’ve ever found yourself attracting people who aren’t a fit (or who vanish after a great first date), we talk about the unconscious ways that might be happening—and what you can do to shift it.🎁 BONUS! This week, we’re sharing our Online Dating Guide which includes:✅ A list of our favourite dating sites for non-monogamous folks✅ Tips for writing a standout profile✅ An online dating checklist✅ Links to related trainings and podcasts👉Download it for free here: ⁠https://go.letstalkpolyamory.com/onlinedatingguide⁠💬 Want to connect with others who get it? Join our private Facebook group:🔗 ⁠https://www.facebook.com/groups/letstalkpolyamory⁠⚡️ Curious about Coaching? Sign up for a Pay What You Can Coaching Call with Tara at:🔗 ⁠https://go.taraandandre.com/pwyccoachingsession⁠ ⚡️Looking for Therapy? Book a complimentary therapy consultation with André Turcotte at ⁠https://book.a-psych-online.com/therapyconsultation⁠ ✨You can also explore other ways to work with us as well as access other great resources at:🔗 ⁠https://www.taraandandre.com⁠

  25. 58

    58: What Does It Mean to Be Visible? Being Out and Open as Polyamorous

    At the time of recording this episode, it’s the Week of Visibility for Non-Monogamy — July 7–13, 2025. This global campaign and week of action, created by Open Love NY, celebrates the many ways people love, connect, and relate outside of monogamy—including polyamory, open relationships, relationship anarchy, swinging, and more.The Week of Visibility exists to:Celebrate diverse relationship structures (because monogamy is actually the minority—both globally and across human history),Challenge stigma and misconceptions (we’re not perverts, immature, or avoidant, thank you very much),Promote inclusion in media, healthcare, education, and law,And Uplift marginalized voices, especially queer, trans, BIPOC, and disabled folks whose experience of non-monogamy is often erased or misunderstood.In this episode, we explore what it means to be visible as people who practice consensual non-monogamy. We reflect on our own experiences around coming out—Tara shares in detail what it was like to come out as non-monogamous to her family, why it mattered, how we prepared, what happened, and how it’s going now. André shares about coming out to his mother—and her  openness to the idea and her love. We also walk through each day’s theme from the Week of Visibility: History & Culture, Identity & Inclusion, Myths & Misconceptions, Public & Private, Law & Advocacy, and Integration & Reflection.For each, we offer personal reflections and suggest actions you can take to explore what visibility looks like for you—whether that means being out and proud, private and processing, or somewhere in between.💜 IMPORTANT NOTE:We’re offering visibility as an invitation, not a prescription.Visibility is powerful—but it’s not always accessible or safe. You are allowed to choose what’s right for you.🔗 Mentioned in the Show:Learn more and participate in the Week of Visibility:⁠https://www.weekofvisibility.com⁠Share your story anonymously (or publicly):⁠https://www.weekofvisibility.com/shareyourstory⁠Episode 7: How We Love: What Style of Non-Monogamy is for Me - ⁠https://open.spotify.com/episode/2wQiiMrHCFltYorI7bdEGs?si=TBCGeov_R1qUiuE2cEabsg⁠ (this has a link to download a free worksheet)Episode 40: Debunking Common Myths about Polyamory ⁠https://open.spotify.com/episode/0rst1t9Jv2x6xlgkJE2fYP?si=dOKRcCONQxW_k1E8xTdBCA⁠Learn more about our Poly Newbies Digital Course and get it for the special Week of Visibility price - ⁠https://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiesspecialoffer⁠ Map of Non-Monogamy - Franklin Veaux - ⁠https://blog.franklinveaux.com/2017/12/an-update-to-the-map-of-non-monogamy/⁠ 📝 Connect with UsWe’re Tara & André—coaches, educators, and polyamory advocates helping people create secure, satisfying, and sexy non-monogamous relationships.📱 Instagram → ⁠https://www.instagram.com/taraandandre/⁠ ⚡️ TikTok →⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@letstalkpolyamory⁠ 🌐 Learn more about our programs and services or book a consultation call → ⁠https://www.taraandandre.com⁠

  26. 57

    57: Relationship Burnout: How to Make LRE feel like NRE Again

    Feeling disconnected or depleted in your long-term relationship while totally lit up by someone new? You're not broken—and neither is your relationship. This is a natural progression of relationships, but it doesn't have to be the death knell!In this episode of the Let’s Talk Polyamory Podcast, we explore what happens when burnout shows up in your long-term relationship—often the one where you share a home, kids, responsibilities or calendar—while you’re riding the high of New Relationship Energy (NRE) somewhere else. Inspired by a recent CNN article and relationship expert Esther Perel’s insights, we unpack the real causes of burnout: emotional labor, domestic imbalance, identity loss, over-functioning, and the exhaustion of being the constant container for your partner’s emotions.We also share our own personal stories about what helps us keep our long-term relationship feeling playful, connected, and fresh—even while managing real-life stressors. From RAADAR Relationship Reviews and quality time rituals, to creating intentional transitions around new connections, we’ll walk you through practical ways to rekindle the energy you crave—including simple habits backed by research, like the Gottmans’ 5:1 ratio of positive to negative interactions that helps relationships stay strong and emotionally resilient.In this episode, we cover:💡 What burnout really looks like in long-term relationships🧯 The top causes of relationship fatigue (hint: it’s not just about desire)💘 Why NRE feels so good—and how to channel that energy intentionally into other relationship🛠️ Tools for making LRE feel exciting again (without pretending it’s brand new)👫 Our own practices for keeping long-term love feeling alive💌 Ready for deeper support? Check out our Poly Newbies Digital Course or join us in the next round of our Polyamory Mastery Program. Links in the show resources below👇Show Resources:CNN Article about Relationship burnout: https://www.cnn.com/2025/05/03/health/relationship-burnout-wellness Want to know more about NRE? Check out the episode, New Relationship Energy: The Awesome & The Awful - https://open.spotify.com/episode/6IbCK3XZ1louXULbFvAwyR?si=pvkCoL8XRJCKBXjhZ-_fqg  How Can I Hit the Reset Button and Free Myself From Resentments (YouTube) - https://youtu.be/au6-N8qZTDU?si=PZknyyGE8r_15ASp Looking for therapy? Reach out to host André Turcotte and arrange a complimentary therapy consultation at [email protected] a complimentary coaching consultation call with Tara at: ⁠https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue⁠Let’s Talk Polyamory Facebook Group & Community - ⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/groups/letstalkpoly⁠⁠⁠Want to have wildly successful, secure and sexy non-monogamous relationships? Join us for the Poly Newbies Digital Course - https://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiesspecialofferWant a deeper dive, customized program with more direct support from T&A, join us in Polyamory Mastery - https://go.taraandandre.com/polyamorymastery 

  27. 56

    56: Should Polyamory Be Part of 🏳️‍🌈Pride Celebrations?

    Re-released in honour of Toronto Pride!June is 🏳️‍🌈Pride Month in many parts of the world, including here in Toronto, where we've proudly participated in both official and unofficial Pride events over the years—including walking in the parade.One question that often sparks lively debate is: Should relational identities like polyamory be included in Pride?Some argue that Pride is about celebrating sexual and gender identities, and that polyamory and other relational identities don't belong under that umbrella. Others believe that polyamory is a valid identity that deserves visibility—especially when legal recognition, social support, and relationship rights are still lacking.In this episode, we make an intentional effort to explore both sides of this discussion—sharing different perspectives on where polyamory fits within the broader 2SLGBTQIA+ movement. We also touch on the history of how Pride began and the deeper roots of what this celebration represents.We’re revisiting a conversation originally recorded in our private Let’s Talk Polyamory Facebook group. At the time, we had been running our weekly livestream series Mondays with Tara and André there —something we started during the pandemic as a way to stay connected, offer support, and spark real conversations. You’ll hear us share a little bit about how that came to be at the beginning of the episode.This particular livestream was recorded just before the 2022 Toronto Pride Parade, when we organized a walking float with members of our community. We did it again in 2023, that time in collaboration with Polyamorous Living Toronto!⭐️ The sound and video quality isn’t studio-perfect (neither are we!), but we’ve done our best to clean it up. We hope this episode sparks meaningful dialogue—because that’s what Pride is all about.Let us know in the Comments what you think:Should polyamory be part of Pride celebrations?And share your PRIDE stories and photos in our Let's Talk Polyamory group - ⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/groups/letstalkpoly⁠⁠⁠⁠Show Resources:Toronto Pride - https://www.pridetoronto.com/Fierté Montréal (Montréal Pride) - https://fiertemontreal.com/enLooking for support but want to do it at your own pace? Check out our Poly Newbies Digital Course - https://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiescourseBook a complimentary coaching consultation call with Tara at: ⁠https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue⁠Email André to arrange a complimentary therapy consultation at: ⁠[email protected]⁠ Join the waitlist and be the first to find out when our Little Book of Poly Love is out with all the HOT words from A-Z! ⁠⁠⁠https://go.letstalkpolyamory.com/polylovebook-waitlist⁠

  28. 55

    55: The 36 Questions that May Lead to Love… and the Other 36 to Stay in Love

    In 1997, psychologists Arthur Aron and Elaine Aron published the results of a study in the Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin exploring how emotional intimacy between strangers could be accelerated through structured vulnerability. Their method? A series of 36 questions, divided into three sets that become increasingly personal—and it worked.The list became more widely known in 2015 when writer Mandy Len Catron shared her experience with the questions in her viral New York Times article, “To Fall in Love With Anyone, Do This.” She tried the questions herself—and fell in love.But what happens after you fall in love?We recently revisited the original 36 questions as a couple, and while we loved the experience, we felt there were some essential conversations these questions didn't cover, especially if you’re planning to live together, share a life, or deepen a long-term relationship .The result...our own follow-up list: The Other 36 Questions You Need to Ask to Stay in LoveThese are questions we believe every couple (or triad, or quad!) should ask—regardless of how you identify across the spectrum of monogamy to non-monogamy.Here’s what we felt was missing—and what we intentionally added:🩺 Health & Safety: Physical and emotional safety, mental health, STI conversations, trauma history, and comfort with firearms in the home.💰 Money & Lifestyle: Attitudes toward debt, sharing finances, who pays for what, and what fairness looks like.💬 Communication & Conflict: Not just can you talk about hard things—but how you do it.❤️ Relationships, Intimacy & Vulnerability: Relationship style, love languages, attachment and honest💋 Sex, Desire & Kinks: Real talk about pleasure, fantasy, limits, and how sexuality evolves over time.🏡 Habits & Everyday Stuff: Morning routines, animals in bed, bodily quirks.👨‍👩‍👧‍👦 Family & Culture: Navigating traditions, holidays and family🌍 Life Experience & Growth: Travel, independence, firsts, and life lessons as a lens for compatibility.In this episode, we share our experience answering the original 36 questions together, highlight a few of our favourite prompts and how we answered them, and introduce you to our full list of additions—including why we believe they matter!📝 Free Resource: We created a downloadable one-pager with all 72 questions—the original 36 plus our “Other 36”—grouped by theme, so you can explore them at your own pace.https://worksheet.letstalkpolyamory.com/36plus36questionsWhether you're starting something new or rekindling a long-term relationship, these questions are a powerful way to build deeper intimacy, open honest conversations, and get to know your partner(s) on a whole new level.Show Resources:The 36 Questions that May Lead To Love + T&A’s Other 36 Questions You Need to Ask to Stay in Love Download - https://worksheet.letstalkpolyamory.com/36plus36questionsGottman: The 5 to 1 Relationship Ratio - https://www.gottman.com/blog/the-magic-relationship-ratio-according-science/ Looking for support but want to do it at your own pace? Check out our Poly Newbies Digital Course - https://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiescourseBook a complimentary coaching consultation call with Tara at: ⁠https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue⁠Email André to arrange a complimentary therapy consultation at: ⁠[email protected]⁠ Let’s Talk Polyamory Facebook Group & Community - ⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/groups/letstalkpoly⁠⁠⁠Join the waitlist and be the first to find out when our Little Book of Poly Love is out with all the HOT words from A-Z! ⁠⁠https://go.letstalkpolyamory.com/polylovebook-waitlist⁠

  29. 54

    J is for JEALOUSY & the 7 Things You Can Do to Feel More SECURE

    Jealousy… no one wants to feel it, and many of us hope if we ignore it, it’ll just go away. But like going to the dentist, it’s something that’s good for you—and like a cavity, jealousy has to be addressed.This episode is part of our T&A Alphabet Series, where we explore the big topics around non-monogamy, relationships, and sex—one letter at a time. Originally broadcast as a live training in our Let’s Talk Polyamory private Facebook community, we bring you J is for Jealousy!Whether you like it or not, you’re going to encounter jealousy—your own or someone else’s. How will you be affected by it? How will you handle it? That’s what we’re exploring in this conversation.We talk about what jealousy really is, and the deeper emotions that often fuel it—like insecurity, fear, lack of safety, and uncertainty. We might sense a threat that our partner could be “taken” from us, and that fear can lead to reactive behaviors that don’t serve us or our relationships.We also offer practical guidance for working through jealousy, including 7 strategies to shift your mindset, communicate better, and reconnect with what’s good in your relationship—rather than clinging tightly or spiralling into worst-case scenarios.And we remind you: jealousy isn’t all bad. It’s an internal alert system. It means there’s something worth paying attention to.This episode touches on one of the core modules of our Polyamory Mastery program—our deep dive signature group coaching experience for people ready to create secure, satisfying, and sexy non-monogamous relationships. We’ll be running a small-group spring cohort. If you’re interested, reach out to [email protected] and visit taraandandre.com/polyamorymastery for more details on the program.Show Resources:Looking for support but want to do it at your own pace? Check out our Poly Newbies Digital Course - https://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiescourseBook a complimentary coaching consultation call with Tara at: ⁠https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue⁠Email André to arrange a complimentary therapy consultation at: ⁠[email protected]⁠ Let’s Talk Polyamory Facebook Group & Community - ⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/groups/letstalkpoly⁠⁠⁠Join the waitlist and be the first to find out when our Little Book of Poly Love is out with all the HOT words from A-Z! ⁠⁠https://go.letstalkpolyamory.com/polylovebook-waitlist⁠

  30. 53

    53: Where Are We Now? De-escalation One Year Later

    Almost a year ago and just shy of 7 years of being together, we made a decision to de-escalate our non-monogamous relationship. It was met with a lot of questions and concerns from close friends and family - are you breaking up? Do you no longer love each other etc. We even released a special podcast on this topic - (S1. Ep 16) Is It Time To Deescalate My Relationship - and yet there were still some skeptics!And now, over 365 days later, reflecting on this experience, we know it was the absolute right decision for us (even though there were some tough spots to navigate) and has in fact strengthened our connection!In this deeply personal episode we catch you up on what prompted the decision, how we felt at the time, how it went and how things are now! We also review what de-escalation means and how it differs from breaking up, and the types of situations that might prompt this kind of change in a relationship.And for those who don’t intend on de-escalating, or stop living together, we share examples of how you can breathe more life into your relationships by spending intentional time together and creating space and time to restore your own independence. Exciting news: As we announced in this episode we are considering running a Spring cohort of our Polyamory Mastery group coaching program—but we need at least 5 couples (or individuals) to commit to make it happen.This is our deeper dive group coaching experience for people who are looking for real transformation, and support that actually makes a difference in creating secure, satisfying and sexy non monogamous relationships!This program includes:8+ in-depth modules of training with brand new content, all of which will be recorded and added to the course siteDownloadable tools and exercises so you can actively apply the training to your unique relationship(s)And of course live coaching with us!You can find out more about the program here - https://go.taraandandre.com/polyamorymastery and to apply, drop us an email at [email protected] get a bit of background on where we were when we decided to do this we suggest you catch up on the podcast we recorded and listen to our Poly Diaries journal entries from last year! See links in the show resources below.Show Resources:Book a 15 minute call with Tara at https://go.taraandandre.com/15mincoffeechat to talk about Polyamory Mastery or email her at [email protected] 1 Episode 16: Is It Time to De-escalate My Relationship?  https://open.spotify.com/episode/0MGkEmWemnQRg1fDNjFQtk?si=A6reBvLbRs-cCQft5GbLow Tara’s Poly Diaries entry -  ⁠https://youtu.be/NQvmI5WXIsE?si=DLSRQLA1K-Q7WvX⁠ Andre’s Poly Diaries entry -  ⁠https://youtu.be/AS8NkrKYj3A?si=OAlAPqCCEfEOo_A0⁠ Book a complimentary coaching consultation call with Tara at: ⁠https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue⁠Email André to arrange a complimentary therapy consultation at: ⁠[email protected]⁠ Let’s Talk Polyamory Facebook Group & Community - ⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/groups/letstalkpoly⁠⁠⁠

  31. 52

    52: I is for INSECURITY and the 3 Things You Can Do to Feel More Secure

    We’re back with another episode in our T&A Alphabet Series, where we explore the big topics around non-monogamy, relationships, and sex—one letter at a time. Originally broadcast as a live training in our Let’s Talk Polyamory private Facebook community, this episode is all about the letter I: I is for Insecurity and the 3 Things You Can Do to Feel More Secure.Insecurity can show up as self-doubt, anxiety, or the sense that you're vulnerable to harm or rejection. In open or polyamorous relationships, it often feels like living on high alert—waiting for the next fire to put out.In this episode, we dig into the connection between insecurity and jealousy, and share three key practices to help you feel more grounded and secure:Introspection – exploring the roots of your jealousy and insecurityCommunication – both with yourself and with your partnersDetermining remedies – identifying what you actually need to feel safer and more supportedWe also explore:Why insecurity is often more about internal narratives than external realitiesHow to tell the difference between real concerns and the stories we tell ourselvesWays to shift out of recurring insecurity loopsHow limiting beliefs can feed insecurity—and how to build a “positive evidence stack”Powerful self-reflection questions to uncover the source of your insecurityExamples of real remedies that have worked for us and our clientsIf jealousy and insecurity are keeping you from feeling at ease in your consensually non-monogamous relationships, check out our self-paced Poly Newbies Digital Course https://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiescourse or go deeper with our Open Relationship and Polyamory Mastery - https://go.taraandandre.com/polyamorymastery - program, which includes live coaching with us.Show Resources:Practicing Polyamory Podcast - Asking Questions Can Change Your Life with T&A episode - https://youtu.be/lpd_5FwDRxc?si=AqagOShSzkQeTCgt Book a complimentary coaching consultation call with Tara at: ⁠https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue⁠Email André to arrange a complimentary therapy consultation at: ⁠[email protected]⁠ Let’s Talk Polyamory Facebook Group & Community - ⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/groups/letstalkpoly⁠⁠⁠

  32. 51

    51: Non-Monogamy and Your Mental Health

    Non-monogamous relationships can offer joy, freedom, and deep connection—but they can also stir up intense emotional waves.In honour of Mental Health Week in Canada, this heartfelt and practical episode explores what it really looks like to care for your mental health while navigating non-monogamy.Whether you're facing overwhelm, burnout, comparison, or jealousy—or just want to feel less alone—this conversation is for you.In this episode we cover:Common emotional and mental health challenges in non-monogamyWhy you don’t have to be “fully healed” or “totally secure” to do this wellMental health-boosting habits: self-care, alone time, personal boundaries, check-ins, and restWhen and how to reach out for support—and what kind of support you might need (coaching, therapy, or DIY approaches)How we support each other through emotionally tough times💛 Special episode resource: Non-Monogamy and Your Mental Health: Worksheet + Action Planning Guide — a free tool to help you reflect, reset, and take practical steps toward improving your mental health and your relationships! Get it here 👇 https://worksheet.letstalkpolyamory.com/mentalhealthThis episode is your reminder: struggling doesn’t mean you’re doing it wrong—it means you’re human. Seeking support is a sign of strength.Please share this episode with someone who might need it.If you’re considering self-harm or harming others, please reach out to a local crisis line, call 911, or go to the nearest emergency room. You are not alone.Show Resources:Free Download: Non-Monogamy and Your Mental Health: Worksheet + Action Planning Guide - https://worksheet.letstalkpolyamory.com/mentalhealth. You can download and print it and fill it in or use something like PDF Guru to upload and fill it in (https://pdfguru.com/app)  Book a complimentary coaching consultation call with Tara at: https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescueEmail André to arrange a complimentary therapy consultation at: [email protected] Let’s Talk Polyamory Facebook Group & Community - ⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/groups/letstalkpoly⁠⁠Polyamory-Friendly Professionals Directory - https://www.polyfriendly.org/Psychology Today - Search for Therapists, Treatment Centres and Support Groups - https://www.psychologytoday.com/ca/therapists - this is the Canada link but you change the country in the top upper right hand corner.

  33. 50

    50: Rules vs Boundaries vs Agreements: How to Set Your Non-Monogamous Relationships Up for Success

    You’ve opened up your relationship or decided to explore non-monogamy, and at first, you’re excited — until BOOM — you're hit with a wave of feelings: jealousy, insecurity, anger, hurt...You pump the brakes and set up rules to try to protect yourself and your partners from all this discomfort.But it doesn’t work.The rules feel punitive, like you're on a leash (and not the fun, kinky kind), and you're still overwhelmed with emotions.In this episode, we’re talking about the difference between rules, boundaries, and agreements — and why shifting from punitive rules to collaborative agreements is the real key to feeling secure.We introduce the Values-Based Agreement™ Model we developed and teach our clients, and share what it looks like in our own relationship!We also dive into:Common rules couples often try (like vetos, partner approvals, or “don’t fall in love” rules) and why they’re doomed to failHow to create Values-Based Agreements™ that everyone helps craft, consents to, and that truly support communication, reduce assumptions, and build trustReal examples of agreements from our own relationship and specific examples of agreements we've helped couples we work with createAs a bonus, we also dig into communication tools like active listening, plus tips for dealing with feedback, criticisms, and resentments — all key skills for creating stronger, more resilient relationships.It’s a jam-packed episode full of practical tools, real talk, and real-world examples!✨ If you want to dive even deeper into boundaries, check out our episode: Pardon Me But You’re Stepping On My Boundaries.Show Resources:Let’s Talk Polyamory Facebook Group & Community - ⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/groups/letstalkpoly⁠⁠Mondays with Tara & André training on How to Free Myself From Resentments - in our private FB Group, Let’s Talk Polyamory - https://www.facebook.com/668591277/videos/671316904269389/ Want to learn how to create agreements that work and have wildly successful, secure and sexy non-monogamous relationships? Join us for the Poly Newbies Digital Course - https://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiesspecialofferJoin the waitlist and be the first to find out when our Little Book of Poly Love is out with all the HOT words from A-Z! ⁠⁠https://go.letstalkpolyamory.com/polylovebook-waitlist⁠Looking for therapy? Book a consultation call at https://book.a-psych-online.com/therapyconsultationLooking for coaching support?  Book a consultation call with Tara - ⁠https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue⁠ Get the Free Building and Communicating Boundaries Worksheet ⁠https://worksheet.letstalkpolyamory.com/boundarieshttps://worksheet.letstalkpolyamory.com/boundaries⁠

  34. 49

    49: H is for Sexual HEALTH and HAIR

    We’re back with another episode in our T&A Alphabet Series, where we tackle big topics around non-monogamy, relationships, and sex — one letter at a time. Originally broadcast as a live training in our Let’s Talk Polyamory private Facebook Community, this episode is all about the letter H - H is for Sexual HEALTH and HAIR! While it can be an uncomfortable subject for some (at least until you get used to it), being open about sexual health and regular testing is crucial — especially when you have multiple sexual partners. For us, getting tested regularly has become a badge of honour, not something to be embarrassed about.In this episode, we break down the difference between an STD (Sexually Transmitted Disease) and an STI (Sexually Transmitted Infection), and why the shift in terminology matters. We talk about removing the stigma around testing, STIs, and sexuality — and how to navigate those conversations with partners in a way that’s honest, caring, and responsible.We share the kinds of tests you should ask for (because not everything is included by default), and discuss ways to reduce or prevent the incidence of STIs. Yes, we talk about condoms and barriers — but also about vaccines (like HPV and Hepatitis), rinsing your mouth and washing your hands between partners, and even bringing our own safer sex kits to parties and clubs.And then we shift gears — but stay close to the skin — with a chat about HAIR ... especially the hair down there. We unpack how history, pop culture and media have influenced how we feel about hair, and how that connects to our sense of self, body image, self-worth, and how we show up in intimate moments.Some people love it, some hate it, some wax it, some grow it — and some braid it if they’re feeling fancy. Whatever your vibe, we’re here to say: there’s no “right” way to be hairy… or not. What matters is choice, consent, and comfort — just like every other part of your sexuality.Oh — and yes, we throw in a few bonus “H” words along the way. 😉As always, there’s some laughter, some real talk, and important info for anyone who is sexually active — no matter your relationship style.Show Resources:Need support in having wildly successful, secure and sexy non-monogamous relationships? Join us for the Poly Newbies Digital Course - https://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiesspecialofferLet’s Talk Polyamory Facebook Group & Community - ⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/groups/letstalkpoly⁠⁠Join the waitlist and be the first to find out when our Little Book of Poly Love is out with all the HOT words from A-Z! ⁠⁠https://go.letstalkpolyamory.com/polylovebook-waitlist⁠Looking for therapy? Reach out to host André Turcotte and book a consultation call at [email protected] for coaching support?  Book a consultation call with Tara - ⁠https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue⁠ 

  35. 48

    48: The First 3 Steps to Opening Your Relationship (Without Crashing It)

    You know that feeling when you get a new car? It’s shiny, exciting, full of possibilities—and your imagination runs wild. But then reality hits: taxes, car payments, insurance, maintenance… and suddenly, the fantasy doesn’t quite match the day-to-day.Opening up a monogamous relationship can feel the same way. The excitement of exploring non-monogamy can cause folx to skip over some crucial steps—only to find themselves overwhelmed or unprepared.In this episode, we break down three essential things to do before (or even after) you start dating others:Determine your ideal relationship style, what you value, and your personal boundariesGet clear on what works for you based on your needs for emotional and sexual exclusivity, your core values, and the limits that help you feel secure.Have essential conversations with your partner(s)Talk about what you each want, share boundaries, co-create what works for you as a unit, and build a Values-Based Agreement™ to guide you forward.Check in regularly and revisit your agreementsKeep communication open and honest as things evolve. Your relationship is a living thing—it needs maintenance to thrive.Whether you're just beginning your journey or already navigating the waves of non-monogamy, these steps can help prevent common pitfalls and keep your connection strong.Think of our Poly Newbies Digital Course as the “insurance policy” for your open relationship journey. And if you’ve already hit a few bumps in the road, it’s the perfect tune-up to get you back on track. Find out more here - https://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiesspecialoffer🎧 Related episodes to check out next:How We Love: What Style of Non-Monogamy is For Me? - https://open.spotify.com/episode/2wQiiMrHCFltYorI7bdEGs?si=3DfvnJG9StK_3Pnmo6kq_gPardon Me But You're Stepping on my Boundaries - https://open.spotify.com/episode/2WMeYiXfpLXqYLrJbGlG7S?si=APZQLOTPQ2-wOqseXMDi3QHow to Start in Polyamory and Not Totally Suck at It - https://open.spotify.com/episode/7F9IsYAqghAgxdd86i60s9?si=raAvjd37QeuBQw-UfB6l6g Show Resources:Let’s Talk Polyamory Facebook Group & Community - ⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/groups/letstalkpoly⁠⁠Looking for sex+ psychotherapy? Reach out to host André Turcotte and book a consultation call at ⁠[email protected]⁠Looking for poly-friendly coaching support?  Book a complimentary consultation call with co-host Tara - ⁠⁠https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue⁠⁠ Book by Dr. Liz Powell - Building Open Relationships - https://drlizpowell.com/buildingopenrelationshipsbook/Join the waitlist and be the first to find out when our Little Book of Poly Love is out with all the polyamory words from A-Z! ⁠⁠https://go.letstalkpolyamory.com/polylovebook-waitlist⁠

  36. 47

    47: Polyamory & Transgender Inclusion, Visibility & Allyship

    ⚠️ Trigger Warning: This episode includes discussions about discrimination, bullying, aggression, and suicide. Trans and non-binary people continue to face widespread hostility, including physical and verbal attacks, online harassment, exclusion in schools and workplaces, and restrictive laws that limit their rights. If you need support, please reach out to:The Trevor Project (U.S.) – www.thetrevorproject.orgTrans Lifeline (U.S. & Canada) – www.translifeline.orgEgale Canada – www.egale.caLGBT YouthLine (Canada) – www.youthline.caMarch 31 is International Transgender Day of Visibility, a day to celebrate trans and non-binary people while recognizing the challenges they continue to face. In this important episode of the podcast - Polyamory & Transgender Inclusion, Visibility & Allyship - we cover:Understanding Identity – The differences between biological sex, gender identity, gender expression, sexual orientation, and relational identityWhy Visibility Matters – How representation influences acceptance, mental health, and societal changePolyamory & Inclusion – The role of identity in relationships and how to create more inclusive polyamorous spacesThe Current Climate for Trans People – The rise of anti-trans rhetoric, policies, and restrictions around the worldHow to Be an Ally – Actions we can all take to support trans people in personal life, workplaces, and communitiesTrans people are facing increasing threats to their rights, from healthcare restrictions to limitations in schools, sports, and public spaces. Many also experience harassment, violence, and exclusion, making visibility and allyship more important than ever. It’s crucial for all of us—especially in polyamorous communities—to stand up, advocate, and create spaces where everyone belongs.Listen now and let’s work together to build a world where everyone has a place. Please comment with your favourite trans voices to follow! 📢 Share this episode to spread awareness, uplift trans voices, and help create a more inclusive world.Learn more. Be visible. Be inclusive. Be an ally. Show Resources:GLAAD - https://glaad.org/tdov/ and https://glaad.org/transgender PFLAG - ⁠www.pflag.org⁠ and https://pflag.org/transgender-day-of-visibility/Egale Canada - ⁠www.egale.ca⁠The 519 (Toronto-based LGBTQ+ support) - ⁠www.the519.org⁠Contact legislators to support trans rights - Canada - https://www.ourcommons.ca/members/en and United States https://www.usa.gov/elected-officialsLet’s Talk Polyamory Facebook Group & Community - ⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/groups/letstalkpoly⁠⁠Looking for therapy? Reach out to host André Turcotte and book a consultation call at ⁠[email protected]⁠Looking for coaching support?  Book a consultation call with Tara - ⁠⁠https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue⁠⁠ Poly Newbies Digital Course - https://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiescourse

  37. 46

    46: G is For GGG, G-AREA, GROOL and Other Great G-Words

    We're back with another T&A Alphabet Series episode, where we break down big topics in non-monogamy, relationships, and sex—one letter at a time! Originally aired as live trainings in our Let’s Talk Polyamory private Facebook Community and on YouTube, this episode is all about the letter G—and trust us, it’s a GREAT one!We start with ⚡️GGG - Good, Giving, and GameDan Savage coined this term, and we break it down with a special clip from him (link in show notes!).Good 🛏️—Being skilled in bed (yes, it’s a learnable skill!).Giving 🎁—Offering pleasure without expecting it in return. We also sneak in a definition of sexual communal strength.Game 🎲—Willing to explore your partner’s desires (within reason!).We also share how to invite feedback so you can become good, practice being giving, and embrace being game in both polyamory and sex.Then it’s all about the💥 G-AREA, unpacking it’s history, why it’s not just a spot, and share hot tips (plus handy diagrams!) to help you find it—along with other fun zones like the O and A spots!💦 And then there’s GROOL… If you’ve never heard of it, you’ll definitely want to tune in! Plus, we discuss GSERD, GANGBANGS, and even the different types of ejaculate from people with vulvas. (Yes, we go there!)Want to go from GRRR… to GREAT in your open or polyamorous relationships? Our Poly Newbies Course is here to help—it's truly the GIFT that keeps on GIVING 🎁🔗 ⁠https://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiesspecialoffer⁠Show Resources:If you want to learn more about how to join our group program, check out this link - https://go.taraandandre.com/polyamorymastery  Dan Savage clip on the meaning of GGG - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VjavnXMQnHQ Let’s Talk Polyamory Facebook Group & Community - ⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/groups/letstalkpoly⁠⁠Join the waitlist and be the first to find out when our Little Book of Poly Love is out with all the FUN words from A-Z! ⁠⁠https://go.letstalkpolyamory.com/polylovebook-waitlist⁠Looking for therapy? Reach out to host André Turcotte and book a consultation call at ⁠[email protected]⁠Looking for coaching support?  Book a 15 minute chat with Tara - https://go.taraandandre.com/15mincoffeechat 

  38. 45

    45: F is For Our Favourite F-Words: F*ck, Fetish, Foursomes, Fellatio & More

    We’re back with another episode in our T&A Alphabet Series, where we tackle big topics one letter at a time (with plenty of laughs along the way)! Originally aired as live trainings in our Let’s Talk Polyamory Facebook Community, this episode is all about the letter F—and oh boy, do we have some fabulous F-words for you!From the most famous F-word (F*ck, obviously) to all the fun, freaky, and fascinating F-words that spice up our sexual & polyamorous lives, we’re diving deep into:🔥 The 4 Fs (there’s more than one version—listen in to find out!)💋 First dates (the good, the bad, and the fumbly)👩‍❤️‍👨 Foursomes (and the juicy dynamics of 3+ connections)🌈 Sexual Fluidity (because labels are flexible, just like us)🍆 Fornicating & Fellatio (because we’re here for pleasure)🎩 Fly Jockey (with a throwback to '70s porn & why sex clubs need coat hooks!)🏳️‍🌈 Friend of Dorothy & Friend of Bill (and the fascinating origins of these phrases)🚃 Frotteurism & Frotteuristic Disorder (yep, we go there)😱 FEAR (the F-word we love to hate—and all the ways it shows up)But that’s not all! We also take a deep dive into Fetishes, Fetishism, and Racial Fetishization—breaking down stigmas and normalizing sexuality in all its fantastic and fluid forms.So grab your favorite F-drink (Fireball?? Fanta?), find a comfy spot, and let’s f*cking talk about it! 🔥🎧If opening your relationship or exploring polyamory is a lot less FUN than you imagined or your constantly putting out FIRES, (and not the sexy kind) our Poly Newbies Course can help. It’s designed to guide you step-by-step on building a secure foundation so you can experience the pleasure and enjoyment you imagined when you first decided to become non-monogamous. Find out more here: https://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiesspecialofferShow Resources:Let’s Talk Polyamory Facebook Group & Community - ⁠https://www.facebook.com/groups/letstalkpoly⁠Join the waitlist and be the first to find out when our Little Book of Poly Love is out with all the FUN words from A-Z! ⁠https://go.letstalkpolyamory.com/polylovebook-waitlistLooking for therapy? Reach out to host André Turcotte and book a consultation call at [email protected] for coaching support?  Book a consultation call with Tara - ⁠https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue⁠ 

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    44: E is for ETHICAL NON-MONOGAMY: What Makes it Ethical?

    Welcome to the fifth instalment of our T&A Alphabet Series, where we break down big topics one letter at a time complete with stories and some laughs along the way! Originally recorded as a live training in our Let’s Talk Polyamory private Facebook community and on YouTube, this episode is all about the letter E:✨ E is for Ethical Non-Monogamy: What Makes It Ethical?You might be thinking…Wait… Didn’t you already cover this in C is for Consensual Non-Monogamy, Communication… and Cookies!?Great question! While consensual non-monogamy (CNM) and ethical non-monogamy (ENM) are often used interchangeably, there are some subtle differences which is why someone might use one or the other. We explore what those differences are and what truly makes a relationship ethical (or not).💡 Other Key Topics:🔹 Why transparency is essential for avoiding misunderstandings & drama🔹 The risks & rewards of openly declaring your non-monogamy🔹 What happens when one partner wants to be monogamous and the other doesn’tWe also answer some community questions including:✅ Is a Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell (DADT) policy still ethical?✅ Is breaking an agreement unethical?✅ Can there be cheating in ENM?✅ When and why do we need to announce that we’re non-monogamous?📢 Plus, we toss in some bonus E words: ejaculation, erotocentrism, and the difference between envy vs. jealousy!Tara also shares personal experiences from coming out to her family as polyamorous and the challenges that followed. Want more? Check out related videos in our Let’s Talk Polyamory private Facebook group (links in the show notes!).🎧 Hit play & let’s talk polyamory!Show Resources:Let’s Talk Polyamory Facebook Group & Community - ⁠https://www.facebook.com/groups/letstalkpoly⁠Video: How to talk to parents about being polyamorous or in an open relationship - https://youtu.be/UxYecGOZ3WY?si=OaNmNcBea2bA27sH Guide 4: Hot Topics in group where coming out videos are housed: https://www.facebook.com/groups/letstalkpoly/learning_content/?filter=230771232079665 Be the first to find out when our Little Book of Poly Love is out. Join the waitlist here: ⁠https://go.letstalkpolyamory.com/polylovebook-waitlistLooking for therapy? Reach out to host André Turcotte and book a consultation call at [email protected] for coaching support?  Book a consultation call with Tara - ⁠https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue⁠ 

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    43: D is for DRAMA: 5 Things to Address Drama & Chaos in Relationships

    Welcome to the fourth instalment of our T&A Alphabet Series where we tackle big topics one letter at a time (and throw in some laughs along the way). Originally broadcast as live trainings in our Let’s Talk Polyamory private Facebook Community and on YouTube, this episode is all about the letter D with our topic D is for DRAMA: 5 Things to Address Drama & Chaos in Relationships.With so many fun D-words out there (we know what you’re thinking… 🍆), why focus on drama? Because at the time of recording, we had just navigated a “dramatic episode” in our own relationships—something rare for us but important to work through. In this episode, we break down exactly how we handled it and the lessons we learned.Unnecessary relationship drama often comes down to a few key issues: a need for control, poor communication, a craving for validation, or a lack of self-awareness. Drama doesn’t just show up uninvited—you either create it, invite it, or surround yourself with people who bring it.In this episode we cover:✅ How drama manifests in relationships✅ How to recognize when you’re escalating it (or causing it)✅ The 5 things you can do to de-escalate drama and restore balance✅ The connection between attachment styles and dramaAnd a lot more!If opening your relationship or exploring polyamory has felt like a never-ending cycle of drama, conflict, and emotional fires, our Poly Newbies Course can help. It’s designed to guide you step-by-step on building a secure foundation so you can experience the pleasure and enjoyment you imagined when you first decided to become non-monogamous. You can find out more here - https://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiesspecialofferShow Resources:Let’s Talk Polyamory Facebook Group & Community - ⁠https://www.facebook.com/groups/letstalkpoly⁠Be the first to find out when our Little Book of Poly Love is out. Join the waitlist here: ⁠https://go.letstalkpolyamory.com/polylovebook-waitlistLooking for therapy? Reach out to host André Turcotte and book a consultation call at [email protected] for coaching support?  Book a coaching consultation call with Tara - ⁠https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue⁠ 

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    42: Time Management in Polyamory: How to Avoid Burnout & Overcommitment

    After jealousy, time management is often the number 2 reason why people feel that being non-monogamous and having multiple relationships wouldn't work for them at all.And one of the most common things we hear from our listeners is that they struggle with balancing multiple relationships, personal time, and life responsibilities.In this brand new episode of the Let's Talk Polyamory Podcast, we discuss a much requested topic - Time Management in Polyamory: How to Avoid Burnout & Overcommitment.In this episode we cover: What is time management and why is it important? Why time management can become an issue when non-monogamous Strategies and tools for scheduling and managing time How to avoid polysaturation Our Not-To-Do list for time management in relationshipsShow Resources: Let’s Talk Polyamory Facebook Group & Community - ⁠https://www.facebook.com/groups/letstalkpoly⁠.  Need support in having wildly successful, secure and sexy non-monogamous relationships? Join us for the Poly Newbies Digital Course -https://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiesspecialoffer Looking for therapy? Reach out to host André Turcotte and book a consultation call at [email protected] Looking for coaching support?  Book a consultation call with Tara - ⁠https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue⁠  Article by Sarah Zoloth - https://www.nshss.org/resources/blog/blog-posts/time-management-what-is-it-and-why-is-it-important/  Article in More Than Two About Time Management - https://www.morethantwo.com/polytime.html 

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    41: C is for Consensual Non-Monogamy, Communication and ... Cookies!

    Welcome to the third instalment of ourT&A Alphabet Serieswhere we tackle big topics one letter at a time (and throw in some laughs along the way). Originally broadcast as live trainings in ourLet’s Talk Polyamory private Facebook Community and on YouTube, this episode is all about theletter C!We kick things off with the most obvious C-word:Consensual Non-Monogamy (CNM). We break down what it is and explore11 different CNM relationship styles—from monogamish to swinging, open relationships, polyamory, and relationship anarchy. Not sure which style fits you best? We’ve got a handy worksheet for that -https://worksheet.letstalkpolyamory.com/cnmstyleOf course, no discussion of C-words would be complete withoutcommunication, communication, and… you guessed it, more communication! We dive into why talking about all the things (yes,all the things) is the key to making non-monogamy work.And then there’scookies—because what’s an episode without a little sweetness? 🍪 What do cookies have to do with polyamory? You’ll have to listen to find out.Sprinkled throughout, we’ve got bonus C-words from ourLet’s Talk Polyamory community, including:✨ The “underrated sexiness” of Canadians 🍁✨ The power ofcock-fidence 😉✨ And, of course, deliciouslysexy French pastries that start with C!🔥COMING IN 2025: Many of the terms and insights from this series will be featured in our upcoming book,The Little Book of Poly Love! A playful, visual, and accessible guide to navigating non-monogamy, relationships, and identity. Want to be the first to know when it’s out? Join the waitlist here:https://go.letstalkpolyamory.com/polylovebook-waitlistHit play and let’s get into it—cookies and all! 🎧Show Resources:Need support in having wildly successful, secure and sexy non-monogamous relationships? Join us for thePoly Newbies Digital Course -https://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiesspecialofferLooking for therapy? Reach out to host André Turcotte and book a consultation call [email protected] for coaching support?  Book a consultation call with Tara -⁠https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue⁠ Let’s Talk Polyamory Facebook Group & Community -⁠https://www.facebook.com/groups/letstalkpoly⁠. Check out the Mondays with Tara and André Guide for the talks we did on communication that we reference in the episode.Jessica Fern’s bookPoly Secure -https://www.jessicafern.com/booksMind Body Green Article -https://www.mindbodygreen.com/articles/ethical-non-monogamy-guide?srsltid=AfmBOoqrgaGLAspjRN7j3PBO3xND5d5uEzhn--Et3MyeCXz76gFB3jzf

  43. 40

    40: Debunking Common Myths About Polyamory

    Ever had someone question your polyamorous or non-monogamous relationships—or share misconceptions about what polyamory really is? If you’re new to exploring non-monogamy, you might even find yourself wondering the same things!In this episode, we bust five of the most common and persistent myths that have shaped public perceptions, created unnecessary fears, and discouraged people from exploring non-monogamous relationships—even when they know monogamy isn’t the right fit:🚫 Polyamory is only about sex🚫 Polyamorous people can’t commit or do the work of being in a monogamous relationship🚫 Polyamory is unnatural🚫 Polyamory always leads to jealousy🚫 Polyamory is just a phase until you find the "right person" + if you truly loved someone, you wouldn’t need anyone elseWe dive into why these myths simply aren’t true, sharing personal stories, real-life examples, and insights from our years of coaching, therapy practices, and lived experiences in the polyamorous community.💡 Whether you’re poly-curious, have been practicing non-monogamy for years, or simply want to understand more about consensual non-monogamy, this episode is packed with eye-opening truths and valuable takeaways.We’d love to hear your thoughts! If you’re listening on Spotify, drop us a comment. Join our Let's Talk Polyamory private Facebook group to ask questions, share your experiences, and connect with others.🎧 Tune in now to debunk these myths and discover the truth about polyamory and non-monogamy!Show Resources: Let’s Talk Polyamory Facebook Group & Community - ⁠https://www.facebook.com/groups/letstalkpoly⁠  The Little Book of Poly Love - Join the list to be informed when it’s released -  https://go.letstalkpolyamory.com/polylovebook-waitlist  Poly Newbies Digital Course - https://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiesspecialoffer Sex at Dawn: The Prehistoric Origins of Modern Sexuality,  by Christopher Ryan and Cacilda Jethá. Looking for therapy? Reach out to host André Turcotte and book a consultation call at [email protected] Looking for coaching support?  Book a consultation call with Tara - ⁠https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue⁠ 

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    39: B is for BISEXUALITY: Identity, Expressions, Myths & Realities

    What does being BISEXUAL mean to you? Is it simply about who you're attracted to, or does it extend to your identity, expressions, and how you move through the world? Are you proudly out or navigating life in the closet?In this episode, B is for BISEXUALITY: Identity, Expressions Myths & Realities, we explore bisexuality in all its rich and wonderful dimensions. We unpack what it means to identify as bisexual, debunk common myths, and dive into the stats behind this often-misunderstood identity. We also explain other related identities and expressions  including fluid, omnisexual, pansexual, queer, bigender, and androgynous.We examine how bisexual people are sometimes perceived by stereotypes - like the “tourist” trope or the idea that bisexuality is “just a phase”—and highlight research (like a study from Cornell University) that challenges those narratives.We confront invisibility, erasure, and biphobia, exploring the ways these challenges shape the lives of bi folks.Of course, it wouldn’t be one of our episodes without a few detours! Along the way, we also chat about squirting, the G-area (aka the G-spot), P-spot stimulation, orgasms, and pleasure.This is one of our most personal, revealing episodes yet—full of insights, humour, and plenty of thought-provoking moments. Don’t miss it!This is part of our T&A Alphabet Series, originally broadcast as live trainings in our Let’s Talk Polyamory private Facebook Community and on YouTube. The series covers a wide range of topics related to non-monogamy, relationships, identity, and sexuality, and we are thrilled to share it with our podcast audience throughout Season 2 and beyond.✨ COMING IN 2025: Many of the terms and insights from this series will feature in our T&A Picture Book, a visual and accessible guide to navigating non-monogamy, relationships, and identity. Join the waitlist to be the first to know when it’s available!Need support in having wildly successful, secure and sexy non-monogamous relationships? Join us for POLY NEWBIES - The Course! https://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiescourseShow Resources: The Little Book of Poly Love - Join the list to be informed when it’s released -  https://go.letstalkpolyamory.com/polylovebook-waitlist  Poly Newbies Digital Course - https://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiesspecialoffer Looking for therapy? Reach out to host André Turcotte and book a consultation call at [email protected] Looking for coaching support?  Book a consultation call with Tara - ⁠https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue⁠  Let’s Talk Polyamory Facebook Group & Community - ⁠https://www.facebook.com/groups/letstalkpoly⁠  Episode 33: How to Talk to Kids with Ms. Ashley Robertson - https://open.spotify.com/episode/4mNuk3UkfqUJGWV79BnA4S?si=Y9xSQUxVQKa8gX9pPoy_0g 

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    38: A is for Anorgasmia and How to Have Awesome Sexual Pleasure!

    Many people think of orgasms as the ultimate destination when it comes to pleasure, but the truth is, they’re just one part of the journey. If you’ve ever struggled with orgasms or thought it was just about physical stuff, buckle up—this episode will have you rethinking a lot of things, taking notes and maybe even laughing along the way!In this episode A is for Anorgasmia and How to Have Awesome Sexual Pleasure we take a playful, yet deeply informative dive into: What anorgasmia actually is (spoiler: it’s more common than you think!). The different types of anorgasmia and the causes behind them. Statistics about anorgasmia and orgasms in general with some myth-busting included. How to talk about what you want to increase your pleasure! And how it’s important to get out of your head and into your body and senses for greater pleasure.We give an up close and person view into our own relationship and individual experiences with pleasure and sex.This is also a special episode as we share a story about talking to André’s 78 year mom about our openness as well as her own desires for dating and a long-term partner. Sadly Maman is no longer with us but there’s some lovely memories of her at the beginning of the episode. 💖This kicks off our Alphabet Series a collection of trainings that were originally live broadcasted to our Let’s Talk Polyamory private Facebook group. In these lively talks, we unpack everything from non-monogamy and relationships, to sexuality, identity and everything in between.  We’re thrilled to bring these fan-favourites to the podcast throughout Season 2 and beyond, alongside brand-new episodes!✨ COMING SOON: Many of the terms and concepts from this series and more will feature in our Little Book of Poly Love (working title) set to release in 2025. Add yourself to the waitlist to be the first to know when it’s available!Show Resources: The Little Book of Poly Love - Join the list to be informed when it’s released -  https://go.letstalkpolyamory.com/polylovebook-waitlist  Poly Newbies Digital Course -  https://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiesspecialoffer Looking for therapy? Reach out to host André Turcotte and book a consultation call at [email protected] Looking for coaching support?  Book a consultation call with Tara - https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue⁠ Let’s Talk Polyamory Facebook Group & Community - https://www.facebook.com/groups/letstalkpoly⁠  Club L Montreal - https://www.leclubl.com/  Relationship Visualization Exercise with Tara on YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lnDKIkKD35g&t=27s  Sensual Touch Partner Experience with Tara & André - https://www.youtube.com/live/pl9i8PbfTXo?si=laNAJGNKzehnVm2D  Find out more about us and services, programs and more at ⁠⁠https://taraandandre.com/ 

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    37: 5 Steps to Have Holly Poly-Days and Start 2025 Feeling Secure

    Who doesn't want to make their way through the holidays with ease and comfort and as little drama as possible?The holiday season means time spent with friends, family and lovers. And it also can mean a few other things… having to make tough choices on where to be and when to be there, WHO to be with?  having to deal with family members that don't necessarily agree with your relational choices or partner(s) needing to de-stress & prioritize fun and sexy times in between all the holiday obligationsAnd if anything is feeling shaky in terms of your non-monogamy journey, the holidays can be, as André describes "miracle grow for your feelings" and amplify those issues making things stressful or uncomfortable.In this podcast episode we talk in detail about 5 things you can do now to set your holidays up for success and start 2025 feeling much more secure: Reflect on the past year Conduct a thorough RAADAR Relationship Review to assess the health and dynamics of your relationships and connections using the  Do some pre-planning - the who, what, where, when, and how Sharpen your effective communication skills and communicate your needs, wants and desires to partners Prepare and build your toolkit and get direct or indirect support!Interwoven in this discussion as always are a ton of gems of knowledge and stories from their personal experiences and those of friends and people we work with. And if you're looking for holiday gift that keeps on giving for your partner and yourself that will allow you start 2025 feeling FAB-U-LOUS-LY SECURE, sign up for our 7-module Poly Newbies Digital Course! And don't worry about having to do it all right away, you'll have a full 6 months to get it all done! We have a special offer for our podcast listeners and Let's Talk Polyamory community. Find out more here - ⁠https://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiesspecialoffer⁠Show Resources: Poly Newbies Digital Course - https://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiesspecialoffer Open Relationship & Polyamory Mastery Program - https://go.taraandandre.com/polyamorymastery  Let’s Talk Polyamory Private Facebook Group & Community - https://www.facebook.com/groups/letstalkpoly  Multiamory Podcast - https://www.multiamory.com/podcast  Fit Feels Good by Oonagh Duncan (the health and fitness program Tara is a part of) - https://www.fitfeelsgood.com/  Need support and curious about coaching or therapy? Book a consultation call with us: https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue  Find out more about us and services, programs and more at ⁠https://taraandandre.com/ ⁠

  47. 36

    36: Your Poly Newbie Survival Kit Essentials

    What essentials need to be in your Poly Newbie Survival Kit?Are you new to non-monogamy or opening up a relationship? In this episode, we’ll equip you with a list of the tools, insights, and strategies you need to thrive—and avoid some of the most common challenges along the way. These essential steps are drawn straight from our 7-module Poly Newbies Digital Course, designed to set you up for success:1️⃣ The Basics of Non-Monogamy: Key definitions, identifying your “why,” and navigating your hopes and fears.2️⃣ Choosing Your Style: Exploring what kind of non-monogamy aligns with your needs and desires.3️⃣ Mastering Communication: Building connection, eliminating toxic patterns, and speaking your truth effectively.4️⃣ Rightsizing Jealousy: Understanding this complex emotion and cultivating greater security.5️⃣ Attachment Styles: Discovering yours and moving toward secure attachment.6️⃣ Boundaries & Agreements: Creating personal boundaries and our signature Values-Based Relationship Agreements™.7️⃣ Keeping It Awesome: Relationship check-ins, dating tips, and maintaining the spark!✨ Plus, we dive into juicy extras, including:The stages of polyamory—from curious newbies to seasoned veterans.Whether there’s a “right” age to explore non-monogamy.Surprising challenges when opening up an already solid relationship.All this and personal stories from our own non-monogamy journey! 🎉Hit play and start your journey toward thriving in non-monogamy! 🎧💖Show Resources & Special Offers: Poly Newbies Digital Course Community Offer at $97 for 6 months of access - https://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiesspecialoffer Poly Diaries Docs-Series - Subscribe and listen to our diary entries and others at ⁠https://www.youtube.com/@PolyDiaries⁠ Looking for therapy? Reach out to host André Turcotte and book a consultation call at ⁠[email protected]⁠  Have questions about our course or looking for private individual or couple’s coaching? Book a consultation call with host Tara at ⁠https://go.taraandandre.com/15mincoffeechat⁠ Join the Community: Connect will other polyamorous folk here - ⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/groups/letstalkpoly⁠⁠ Learn more: Explore our services, programs and more at ⁠⁠⁠https://taraandandre.com/ 

  48. 35

    35: Building, Rebuilding, and Maintaining Trusts in Relationships - Part 2

    When there's been dishonesty, a betrayal or cheating in a relationship, it can result in a loss of trust that's hard to recover from.This episode is part 2 of a two part-series on Building, Rebuilding, and Maintaining Trusts in Relationships.In Part 1, we explored: What trust really is and why it’s essential How to build a strong foundation of trust Common trust challenges And how to nurture and maintain trust.In Part 2, we pick up where we left off with a recap on what trust is and how trust can be lost specifically in non-monogamous relationships.We then share specific strategies on how you can rebuild trust as a result of any of these things or other setbacks such as: Understanding the reasons behind the breach Releasing anger and resentment Rebuilding trust with consistent actions and words Demonstrating commitment to repair the relationship Communication  And getting support We also share how you might recognize if is an isolated situation or if this person is not trustworthy and it isn’t in your best interest to trust them again.This episode is perfect for anyone navigating trust challenges and looking for practical, compassionate advice to create more secure, resilient relationships.And, in celebration of Polyamory Day on November 23 our gift to you is that you can get our Poly Newbies Digital Course for just $27—a 90% savings off the regular $297 price until Cyber Monday. Learn more at ⁠⁠https://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiesblackfriday⁠⁠⁠ Show Resources: Black Friday Poly Newbies Digital Course Offer at $27 for 6 months of access - ⁠⁠https://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiesblackfriday⁠⁠ Stream episode 32 Building, Rebuilding and Maintaining Trust in Relationship - Part 1 on Spotify ⁠hhttps://open.spotify.com/episode/77sWeDAKTKK2jAbTcZzOiQ?si=XhbvoPvQTpaGXdzycP0GJA⁠ or on your favourite podcasting platform. Looking for therapy? Reach out to host André Turcotte and book a consultation call at ⁠[email protected]⁠   Looking for private individual or couple’s coaching? Book a consultation call with host Tara at: ⁠⁠https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue⁠⁠  Join our online free Let’s Talk Polyamory Facebook Group & Community - ⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/groups/letstalkpoly⁠⁠  Find out more about us and services, programs and more at ⁠⁠⁠https://taraandandre.com/ ⁠

  49. 34

    34: Casual Car Conversations: STIs, Testing & Acceptable Risk

    You may not find it surprising but we talk about non-monogamy, relationships, sex and related topics A LOT, especially when we are driving or travelling. We were having one such conversation recently and decided to record it as we felt our listeners would find it helpful to hear as we work through and discuss a situation that arose for us personally around possible STI exposure and how we might handle sharing how we feel about upcoming plans with friends.In this episode we cover: The importance of regular testing and how often we get tested. What you need to test for. How you can contract certain STIs and how to reduce your risk. The science behind testing frequency and the incubation periods for some common STIs The concept of acceptable risk as it relates to sexual activities. How to incorporate sexual health and STI testing into your relationship agreements. How to share your personal boundaries around testing and agreements with possible partners.We encourage you to do your own research, inform yourself, talk to your doctor, talk to your partners and figure out what’s right for you!And as we asked during the podcast are these things you’ve considered and/or has this podcast changed what you think about wanting to be non-monogamous or in the lifestyle? Let us know in the comments!Show Resources: Black Friday Poly Newbies Digital Course Offer at $27 for 6 months of access - ⁠https://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiesblackfriday⁠ Health Line article on STI incubation periods - https://www.healthline.com/health/how-long-does-it-take-for-std-to-show-up  Understanding Risk By Sex Act - CATIE - https://www.catie.ca/safer-sex-guide/understanding-risk-by-sex-act  T&A Instagram - ⁠https://www.instagram.com/taraandandre/⁠  Looking for therapy? Reach out to host André Turcotte and book a consultation call at andreturcottepsych@gmail .com  Struggling and need support? Reach out and book a free call with us: ⁠https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue⁠  Let’s Talk Polyamory Facebook Group & Community - ⁠https://www.facebook.com/groups/letstalkpoly⁠  Find out more about us and services, programs and more at ⁠⁠https://taraandandre.com/ 

  50. 33

    What to Say? How to Talk to Kids About Non-Monogamy, Sex, Kink and Other Stuff

    Talking to kids about topics like non-monogamy, sex, intimacy, kink and relationships can sometimes  feel daunting parents. It's easy to worry about saying the wrong thing, making things awkward, or just plain messing it up.  In this episode, we sit down with sexuality educator Ms. Ashley Robertson for a deep dive into guiding these conversations with kids of all ages—from toddlers to teens and beyond! Together, we share practical tips, advice, and recommended approaches for discussing these topics at every stage. We cover what the focus should be, how to approach these subjects, which words to use, and even how long these conversations should go. We also discuss what not to say, how to avoid oversharing, and ways to build a “scaffold” of knowledge that helps your kids climb layer by layer without falling off. We touch on essentials like when and how to introduce non-monogamy and partners to kids, what to say if a partner is no longer in your life, and how to manage those moments when kids bring up people from your past that you’d rather forget. And we explore concepts like “chosen family,” the “onion” and “buffet” analogies, being an “askable adult,” consent and how kids are “bystanders”, the “skipping stones” strategy for teens and more! Plus, we answer questions from our Let’s Talk Polyamory community.  And… spoiler alert ...a lot of these tips are great for adult conversations, too! Tune in for practical advice, a few laughs, and all the insights you need to make these talks a little less intimidating and a lot more meaningful! You’re going to love it! Resources: Black Friday Poly Newbies Digital Course Offer at $27 for 6 months of access - https://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiesblackfriday Website Ms. Ashley Robertson: https://www.msashleyrobertson.com/ Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/msashleyrobertson  Ms. Ashely's booklist - https://docs.google.com/document/d/1WaZGbek31WYEbHcdPB3NJd4CKj5dIUhmjmmOL3zheAM/edit?usp=sharing - The 2 books mentioned in our conversation: Penny and the Plain Piece of Paper by Miri Leshem-Pell and Can I Give You a Squish? by Emily Neilson DSM -  Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders. We specifically referred to the DSM-5 - This is an article that might be helpful - https://www.goodtherapy.org/blog/fetishes-and-dsm-v-when-is-kink-mental-health-issue-0829138  T&A Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/taraandandre/  Looking for therapy? Reach out to host André Turcotte and book a consultation call at [email protected]  Let’s Talk Polyamory Facebook Group & Community - https://www.facebook.com/groups/letstalkpoly  Find out more about us and services, programs and more at ⁠https://taraandandre.com/ ⁠

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ABOUT THIS SHOW

You co-hosts T&A, Tara Lynne Franco, Relationship and Awesomeness Coach & André Turcotte, Sex+ Psychotherapist, share their ideas and advice on how to have authentic, connected, secure and sexy non-monogamous relationships whether you're monogamish, in an open relationship, a swinger, polyamorous or a relationship anarchist!They bring together knowledge their years of personal experiences in polyamory, their professional practices working with individuals and couples, professional training + the best information available out there! Visit https://www.taraandandre.com/

HOSTED BY

T and A Coaching and Therapy

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