Living Deliberately - The Podcast

For everyone out there, you will reach a point where you break, fall apart, shatter like a glass because of life’s weight and grit, situations of stress, anguish, pain from loss - all of which contribute to grief (the main sauce and source of breaking points). In this episode, Selorm highlights what it means to simply break and what is in there for newness and growth!

This is another year and July is here - my birthmonth wherein I pour my heart out as a writer in stories that touch on topics that we barely explore about life, living, growing, sustenance and becoming who we aimed to be! This year, I balance deep and sombre reflections of loss, grief, pain, anxiety, and having to survive it all in the midst of society's expectation to see you move on! I am not too excited because I may lose myself on the road but to every tear that we shall shed on the journey, we shall gain some strength! This episode introduces a month of intense storytelling on how loss and grief can change our lives for better and even for worse!

Community building, or better still establishing concrete friendships and connections beyond hello hi and shallow work or church o boys or girls talk, is a very important yet ignored factor in our mental health building. We need to understand that mental health can only be a 10 if we are not an island. We can only feel and exist in that stability if we have a community of people to whom we can share the best and the worst! Else, the dark will drown us!

Two big questions shaped my childhood - what is everyone doing? What are you doing? These questions always came up when my mother and father had to point out the need for me to understand that everyone would surely be up to something but it was not necessarily sacrosanct for me to be doing same - thus the question what am I doing. So this episode exposes the reality of how many of us may be jumping into the bandwagon of what everyone is doing without having a clear assertion of our capacities and capabilities to stand alone, excel in a new and unique way, and to also do something that is not a spin off or a copy of what everyone is doing. It also brings to the fore how some tough love from childhood may have shaped us into unique adults without our tangible realisation!

The moment you decide to be intently, deeply spiritual, you have to equally match up by being deliberately, highly physical - such that your deep spiritual roots by dint of hard work and discipline are equal to your high and excellent physical expressions and attribute by dint of hard work and discipline. This is a lesson I learned in a swing and you have to hear it all!

No matter what you do, you cannot escape decisions. Decision making, making choices, moving or staying, going or coming are the bane of living. Even when you excuse the decision/choice and sit on the fence, you have made a decision/choice; and it will come with consequences. That is why you have to brace yourself to bravely take action and stand up responsibly for the sequence of reactions that come with the action. Decide. Choose. And know that the consequences are inevitable.

Under no circumstance should you take a step, make a move, or “do a thing” without thinking twice about the responsibilities, the personal and group impact, the results and consequences. You have to do the math! You have to count the cost!