Masks Off: Inner Freedom For People-Pleasers and Perfectionists

What if your people-pleasing and perfectionism are not who you are — but approval scripts you learned in childhood?In this episode, Kim Gross celebrates six years of the Masks Off podcast during Inner Child Month and explores the unconscious rules many of us learned about how to be loved, safe, and accepted.These approval scripts can sound like: don’t upset anyone, be good, get it right, blend in, and make sure everyone else is okay.Kim shares how achievement and external validation reinforced her own “good girl” identity, and how these scripts can show up today through saying yes when you mean no, overthinking conversations, avoiding conflict, struggling with boundaries, and feeling responsible for other people’s emotions.She also explains how the Inner Controller tries to protect you from rejection, criticism, and disconnection by keeping you in control and constantly monitoring everyone around you.Using a personal example from a family trip for her daughter’s master’s graduation, Kim walks listeners through how old scripts get activated and how to begin rewriting them with awareness, compassion, and small shifts.This episode is an invitation to stop living by the old rules and begin creating a new way of being — one rooted in truth, freedom, and self-worth.👉 Connect with Kim (the host): 👉 New Book: https://www.kimgrosscoaching.com/free-to-be.php 👉 TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@kimgrosscoaching 👉 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kimgrosscoaching/ 👉 Website: www.kimgrosscoaching.com 👉 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kim.gross.104 👉 Facebook Masks Off Community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/masksoffcommunity 👉 YouTube: https://youtube.com/channel/UCaWJfO7ZFd4aYBX3e-clj9Q 👉 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/2Et9BMqdFriIQ9bUxcfQeg 👉 Apple Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/masks-off/id1513846583 👉 LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/notifications/?filter=all 👉 Unmasked Newsletter: http://subscribepage.io/masksoffnewsletter 👉 People-Pleasing Quiz: https://www.kimgrosscoaching.com/quiz.php

Perfectionism isn’t who you are—it’s who you became to feel safe.In this opening episode of Inner Child Month, Kim shares how her perfectionism and people-pleasing weren’t personality traits, but protective adaptations formed in childhood.She introduces the concept of the inner child and explains how unmet needs around love, safety, and worth shape the patterns we still carry today. Through personal stories—including a pivotal moment at age 10—Kim unpacks how the drive for validation, fear of rejection, and need for control are all rooted in protection.She also introduces the “Inner Controller” and how it creates a false sense of safety through hypervigilance, including how it shows up as health anxiety.This episode is about understanding—not fixing—your patterns.Because awareness is where freedom begins.👉 Connect with Kim (the host): 👉 New Book: https://www.kimgrosscoaching.com/free-to-be.php 👉 TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@kimgrosscoaching 👉 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kimgrosscoaching/ 👉 Website: www.kimgrosscoaching.com 👉 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kim.gross.104 👉 Facebook Masks Off Community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/masksoffcommunity 👉 YouTube: https://youtube.com/channel/UCaWJfO7ZFd4aYBX3e-clj9Q 👉 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/2Et9BMqdFriIQ9bUxcfQeg 👉 Apple Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/masks-off/id1513846583 👉 LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/notifications/?filter=all 👉 Unmasked Newsletter: http://subscribepage.io/masksoffnewsletter 👉 People-Pleasing Quiz: https://www.kimgrosscoaching.com/quiz.php

If you feel stuck, overwhelmed, or disconnected, this episode explores a powerful truth: healing doesn’t come from avoiding your feelings—it comes from allowing them.Kim welcomes grief guide Marie Crews to discuss how grief extends far beyond loss through death. From identity shifts to unmet dreams, grief shows up in ways many people don’t recognize—and often try to suppress.Together, they explore the Inner Controller and how it keeps people stuck in cycles of avoidance, productivity, and emotional disconnection. They also discuss how unprocessed grief lives in the body and how creating safety to feel is the key to true healing.Marie shares her Nautilus Way journaling method as a practical tool to process emotions, rewire beliefs, and move toward peace.This episode is a powerful reminder that peace and pain can coexist—and that feeling is the pathway to freedom.👉 Connect with Kim (the host): 👉 New Book: https://www.kimgrosscoaching.com/free-to-be.php 👉 TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@kimgrosscoaching 👉 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kimgrosscoaching/ 👉 Website: www.kimgrosscoaching.com 👉 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kim.gross.104 👉 Facebook Masks Off Community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/masksoffcommunity 👉 YouTube: https://youtube.com/channel/UCaWJfO7ZFd4aYBX3e-clj9Q 👉 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/2Et9BMqdFriIQ9bUxcfQeg 👉 Apple Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/masks-off/id1513846583 👉 LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/notifications/?filter=all 👉 Unmasked Newsletter: http://subscribepage.io/masksoffnewsletter 👉 People-Pleasing Quiz: https://www.kimgrosscoaching.com/quiz.phpMarie Crews is a certified grief guide, life coach, speaker, retreat facilitator, and bestselling author who has helped women step into their power for over 15 years.After turning personal adversity, including the sudden loss of her son and mother, into a path of resilience, she now guides women in learning how peace and joy can coexist with even the deepest grief.Through her signature journaling method, The Nautilus Way, Marie helps women identify and rewire limiting beliefs so they can access clarity, confidence, and emotional freedom in the face of life’s biggest challenges.Through 1:1 coaching, group programs, and transformational retreats hosted at her Gulf-front home, she empowers women to embrace their worth and live with intention, peace and purpose.https://www.mariecrews.comhttps://www.facebook.com/marieeurecrews https://www.tiktok.com/@empowermentandgriefguidehttps://www.instagram.com/mariecrewsempowers

In this episode, Kim delves into the critical concept of making amends from 12-step recovery programs. She explains that making amends goes beyond simply apologizing; it involves a commitment to change behavior and make different choices in the future. Kim shares her personal experience of making amends with her two children, discussing how her past patterns and emotional wounds impacted her ability to parent effectively. She highlights the importance of taking ownership of one's actions as part of her five-step power pathway to inner liberation. Kim also reviews topics covered in previous episodes, focusing on building meaningful relationships by addressing conflict, attachment styles, and the impact of trauma. Additionally, she emphasizes the significance of moving from a primal state of fear and disconnection to a powerful state of connection, gratitude, and empowerment. Kim offers practical four-step guidelines for making amends and underscores the ongoing nature of personal growth, encouraging listeners to embrace compassion and patience in their journeys. She concludes with an invitation to explore more resources on her website, including her book 'Free to Be: A Pathway to Inner Liberation.'👉 Connect with Kim: 👉 New Book: https://www.kimgrosscoaching.com/free-to-be.php 👉 TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@kimgrosscoaching 👉 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kimgrosscoaching/ 👉 Website: www.kimgrosscoaching.com 👉 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kim.gross.104 👉 Facebook Masks Off Community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/masksoffcommunity 👉 YouTube: https://youtube.com/channel/UCaWJfO7ZFd4aYBX3e-clj9Q 👉 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/2Et9BMqdFriIQ9bUxcfQeg 👉 Apple Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/masks-off/id1513846583 👉 LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/notifications/?filter=all 👉 Unmasked Newsletter: http://subscribepage.io/masksoffnewsletter 👉 People-Pleasing Quiz: https://www.kimgrosscoaching.com/quiz.php

Do you let your life experiences define who you are or do you look at your life experiences as an opportunity to grow and evolve? In this episode Kim and Deborah Corbin talk about the importance of taking every experience in life and growing from them rather than being a victim to circumstances. If you truly want to create the life that you desire, then one of the important steps is to take radical self-responsibility for how you show up in life. Life is full of painful experiences and if we want to suffer less in this life then we must learn to alchemize these painful situations while being gentle and compassionate with ourselves. To hear more insights on this topic tune in. “Your life experiences do not have to define you, rather you have the power to allow them to REFINE YOU.” Deborah Corbin About Deborah: I began my career in education and spent many years teaching in early childhood and elementary school and eventually landed at the college level. In addition I spent many years leading Professional Development seminars for educators with the charge of bringing research concerning "best practices" in educational settings. Essentially turning theory into real quality learning opportunities in the classroom. The focus was always on bringing the highest caliber teaching to educational practices in order to ensure meaningful learning for students. Currently I am leading the way in the personal development space as a leadership and transformational specialist. I am dedicated to charting a path as a change agent and thought-leader. I subscribe to and teach others how to take radical responsibility for their lives in order to excel in both their personal life and business. I am here to support big visionaries, change-agents and those with big global movements as their mission. My chief definite aim is to help people align with their true purpose and rise to a level of excellence in service in their chosen domain. I am the founder of several methodologies that support leading people to embodying their highest-self  in excellence and where true leadership is born. Connect with Deborah: https://www.facebook.com/danncorbin, www.deborahcorbin.com. https://www.facebook.com/groups/excelfromwithin/ Connect with Kim Gross: TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@kimgross24 Masks Off Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/masksoffcommunity/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kim.gross.104 Facebook Masks Off Community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/masksoffcommunity Masks Off email: [email protected] YouTube:YouTube: https://youtube.com/channel/UCaWJfO7ZFd4aYBX3e-clj9Q Spotify:  https://open.spotify.com/show/2Et9BMqdFriIQ9bUxcfQeg Apple podcast:  https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/masks-off/id1513846583 Anchor:  https://anchor.fm/masksoff