Matters of the Heart, and other Failures

PODCAST · health

Matters of the Heart, and other Failures

Welcome to Matters of the Heart, and other Failures— the brutally honest, occasionally hilarious podcast where living with heart failure takes centre stage. Hosted by someone who knows the ups and downs of a dodgy ticker firsthand, each episode brings candid chats with coronary nurses, cardiologists, and fellow humans navigating heart conditions. It’s part education, part therapy, and part gallows humour — because when life hands you a malfunctioning heart, you might as well laugh (gently) about it.

  1. 13

    S02E02: The 5:28am Train, The Wrong Day & The Dietician Who Read Me to Filth

    In Episode 2 of Season Two, Nathan and Scott are back in full ramble mode - covering dietician trauma, disastrous travel planning, and the slow, painful reality of trying to get your life together.Scott kicks things off fresh from a brutally honest appointment where he’s told he’s at his heaviest in 11 years (groundbreaking advice follows: eat less, move more), while Nathan shares the chaos of a Manchester trip that involved booking the wrong train, arriving a full day early, and questioning every life decision before 10am.From there, it spirals - missed buses that may or may not exist, booking a hotel in the wrong Birmingham (Alabama), rail replacement purgatory, and the mental gymnastics of delay repay schemes. There’s also talk of air fryer revelations, quitting smoking (again), testosterone ups and downs, and the quiet rage of being told to “just have six pints a week.”It’s a beautifully chaotic mix of health updates, travel disasters, and everyday frustration - exactly what you’d expect from Matters of the Heart (and Other Failures) as the boys settle back into Season Two with absolutely no structure whatsoever.Grab tickets to Matters of the Heart, and other Failures LIVE! at the Glasgow International Comedy Festival on Saturday 21st March 2026 at ⁠⁠https://www.glasgowcomedyfestival.com/performances/matters-of-the-heart-and-other-failures-live/ ⁠⁠Don't forget to subscribe to the podcast, rate us and share with your pals!Facebook: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61581238112246⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/mattersoftheheartpod/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠TikTok: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@mattersoftheheartfailure⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Youtube: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/@HeartandOtherFailuresPod

  2. 12

    S2:E01 - We Took a Week Off… and Accidentally Disappeared

    But we're BACK! After what was meant to be a short festive break, Nathan Sparling and Scott Agnew return for Season Two of Matters of the Heart (and Other Failures) - with fewer hospital appointments, slightly better health updates, and absolutely no improvement in staying on topic.The pair unpack where they’ve been with house moves, winter slumps, broken routines, and the strange difficulty of restarting life once you’ve stopped for “just a week.” Scott adjusts to life with a CPAP machine that quietly reports his sleep habits back to the NHS, attempts quitting smoking (again), and reflects on how health maintenance becomes normal when the drama settles down. Meanwhile, Nathan experiments with skincare, navigates family interrogations about his love life, and questions how adulthood arrived without warning.Expect tangents involving Olympic luge athletes, curling controversies, disappearing passports, Highland comedy gigs, and existential chats about ageing, habits, and surviving modern life with humour intact.It’s a relaxed reset episode - less crisis, more catching up - and proof that even when nothing dramatic happens, there’s still plenty to fail at together. Season Two starts exactly where it should - mid-conversation, slightly chaotic, and very glad to be back.Grab tickets to Matters of the Heart, and other Failures LIVE! at the Glasgow International Comedy Festival on Saturday 21st March 2026 at ⁠https://www.glasgowcomedyfestival.com/performances/matters-of-the-heart-and-other-failures-live/ ⁠Don't forget to subscribe to the podcast, rate us and share with your pals!Facebook: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61581238112246⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/mattersoftheheartpod/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠TikTok: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@mattersoftheheartfailure⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Youtube: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/@HeartandOtherFailuresPod

  3. 11

    E:10 - Illness, Improvements & Impetigo: Heart Progress, Hormone Highs & Glasgow’s Potato Wars

    Episode 10 is pure, unfiltered chaos - even by Matters of the Heart (and Other Failures) standards. Fresh from an unexpected week off, Nathan and Scott dive straight into a whirlwind of disasters: a flu that left Nathan collapsed on a toilet floor, a trip to the worst stadium in Britain (“a redneck’s ranch held together with plywood”), and a shambolic World Cup draw.Nathan reveals big heart-health news - being officially discharged from the Heart Failure Clinic - while Scott details his testosterone journey, dramatic weight loss, and that time he got translucent beard hairs. They go from gastric flus in East Kilbride to debates about cheese on toast, night-time snacking, OnlyFans cash-doms and impetigo.There’s also a philosophical discussion about cloning Nathan after the apocalypse (terrifying), quitting booze, failing to quit smoking, and discovering a new local eatery called Spudland -which may or may not become TikTok famous.Heart updates, health disasters, comedy festival plugs and culinary shame all collide in this brilliantly unhinged catch-up episode.Grab tickets to Matters of the Heart, and other Failures LIVE! at the Glasgow International Comedy Festival on Saturday 21st March 2026 at https://www.glasgowcomedyfestival.com/performances/matters-of-the-heart-and-other-failures-live/ Don't forget to subscribe to the podcast, rate us and share with your pals!Facebook: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61581238112246⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/mattersoftheheartpod/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠TikTok: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@mattersoftheheartfailure⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Youtube: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/@HeartandOtherFailuresPod

  4. 10

    E:09 - The Tesco Ban, The MRI Penny & Scotland’s Near-Death Football Drama

    In Episode 9, Nathan and Scott deliver peak chaos - a full hour of derailments, medical mishaps, supermarket scandals and Scottish football-induced cardiac events. Scott opens with a confession about nearly being arrested in Tesco for a 10p bag, while Nathan recounts being stopped by Aldi security for mistakenly wandering off with an unpaid tote. From there, the rambling descends beautifully: sleep apnoea naps, testosterone running low, wrestling obsessions, and the existential horror of discovering you're heavier than the Man vs Food guy.Nathan tells the wild story of almost breaking an MRI machine when a rogue penny ripped itself off his leg, while worrying about jean buttons becoming deadly missiles. There’s also a mattress protector meltdown, a political rant about school protests, a failed attempt to quit smoking, and the ominous mysterious ringing cable in Nathan’s house.Finally, the pair relive Scotland’s heart-attack-worthy qualifying match - the near-earthquake at Hampden, the 90-minute agony, the VAR rage, and the collective national blood pressure spike.It’s unhinged, honest, and hilariously Glaswegian - a perfect storm of health chat, football trauma, and daily-life disasters. Everything you expect from Matters of the Heart (and Other Failures) and then some.Don't forget to subscribe to the podcast, rate us and share with your pals!Facebook: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61581238112246⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/mattersoftheheartpod/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠TikTok: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@mattersoftheheartfailure⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Youtube: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/@HeartandOtherFailuresPod

  5. 9

    E:08 - Snowballs, Stovies & Scotland Stress: A Birthday, A Ball Game & A Big Ramble

    In Episode 8, Nathan and Scott arrive late but fully chaotic - recording just one hour before Scotland v Denmark kicks off, sending them into a spiral of football dread, national pride and statistical heartbreak. What begins as a Scotland preview quickly derails into an Olympic-level ramble: birthday confessions, snowball debates (the bakery kind and the marshmallow kind), childhood worm-cutting, air fryer anxiety, hiding sweets in the garden, and whether white dog shites should make a Brexit comeback.Scott reflects on reaching “extra birthday number four” after surviving three cardiac arrests, while Nathan vows to break his Uber Eats addiction after calculating that coriander now costs him £60 a week. The pair also tackle stovies etiquette, black pudding danger levels, nicotine patch failures, and how to stuff a chicken without getting cancelled.It’s peak Matters of the Heart (and Other Failures): zero structure, maximum laughter, and the odd moment of unexpected mortality chat - wrapped around the emotional rollercoaster of supporting Scotland. Perfect for anyone who loves football, food, chaos, or two Scots talking nonsense before kick-off.Don't forget to subscribe to the podcast, rate us and share with your pals!Facebook: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61581238112246⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/mattersoftheheartpod/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠TikTok: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@mattersoftheheartfailure⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Youtube: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/@HeartandOtherFailuresPod

  6. 8

    E:07 - NHS Chaos & Netflix Elbows: Chest Pains & CPAPs

    Episode 7 finds Nathan and Scott in full festive denial and medical mayhem. Between debates about when it’s acceptable to mention Christmas, turning 45 (“born illegal” in pre-1981 Scotland), and A&E adventures with chest pains on Bonfire Night, the pair somehow cover the entire NHS in one episode.Nathan relives his late-night hospital dash - ECGs, overflowing waiting rooms, rogue tea machines, and all - while Scott shares tales of blood-taking disasters, bursitis from “Netflix elbows,” and a looming sleep apnea diagnosis. There’s also talk of politics, prescription policy, tampons in beer bottles, and their upcoming Glasgow International Comedy Festival shows.It’s classic Matters of the Heart (and Other Failures): chaotic, heartfelt, and hilariously human - proving once again that nothing is off limits when you mix chest pain with Christmas chat.Don't forget to subscribe to the podcast, rate us and share with your pals!Facebook: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61581238112246⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/mattersoftheheartpod/⁠⁠⁠⁠TikTok: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@mattersoftheheartfailure⁠⁠⁠⁠Youtube: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/@HeartandOtherFailuresPod

  7. 7

    E:06 - Testosterone, Tenterhooks & The Twilight Wedding: Injections, MRIs and Misplaced Fish & Chips

    In Episode 6, Nathan and Scott spiral delightfully from medical updates to utter madness - covering everything from testosterone jabs that take two minutes to inject (nose-level, no less) to surprise weddings, Twilight ceremonies, and why Scotland does fish and chips better than England.Scott shares the saga of his hormone treatment, shrinking two inches in height, and a surprise bit of good heart news, while Nathan explains ejection fractions, MRI dramas, and his love affair with Trongate Pharmacy. Between debates about immigrant cuisine, Wegovy injections, infected toes, and live show announcements, this episode proves that Matters of the Heart (and Other Failures) is equal parts medical memoir, Scottish banter, and accidental sociology lecture.Expect hormones, humour, and the occasional health miracle in Testosterone, Tenterhooks & The Twilight Wedding.Don't forget to subscribe to the podcast, rate us and share with your pals!Facebook: ⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61581238112246⁠⁠⁠Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/mattersoftheheartpod/⁠⁠⁠TikTok: ⁠⁠⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@mattersoftheheartfailure⁠⁠⁠Youtube: ⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/@HeartandOtherFailuresPod

  8. 6

    E:05 - The Great Mince & Hypnosis Debate: Teeth, Triggers & Tobacco Patches

    In Episode 5, Nathan Sparling and Scott Agnew go completely off-script - from dental trauma and dodgy crowns to the generational mystery of why Scott’s mum’s mince and tatties are famously inedible. Between tales of weeping skin, hypnotist disasters, and burning £170 & a pack of cigarettes in a stranger’s firepit, the pair somehow circle back to heart health, cough-induced collapses, and quitting smoking (again).It’s equal parts therapy session, kitchen confessional, and Scottish stand-up chaos - complete with gravy debates, psychic healers, and a deep dive into why Earl Grey tastes like dental work. Expect laughter, oversharing, and a generous sprinkling of second-hand smoke in the latest episode of Matters of the Heart, and other Failures. Don't forget to subscribe to the podcast, rate us and share with your pals!Facebook: ⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61581238112246⁠⁠Instagram: ⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/mattersoftheheartpod/⁠⁠TikTok: ⁠⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@mattersoftheheartfailure⁠⁠Youtube: ⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/@HeartandOtherFailuresPod

  9. 5

    E:04 - The Great Tea Incident of October: Choking, Cardiac Rehab & Cup-of-Tea Trauma

    In this chaotic and hilarious third episode of Matters of the Heart, and Other Failures, Nathan Sparling and Scott Agnew unravel the “Great Tea Incident of October” - the near-death moment that left Scott’s mum traumatised, Nathan speechless, and everyone questioning whether a cuppa can, in fact, kill you.Between tales of Herbalife horrors, collapsing on cardiac rehab walks, and conspiracies about the Post Office being a front for serial killers, the pair tackle the absurd side of life after heart drama - when every cough, cramp, or crutch feels like a medical emergency.It’s brutally honest, darkly funny, and exactly what you’d expect from two men who’ve faced heart failure and heart attacks, and decided to make a podcast about it. Expect laughter, panic, oversharing, and a reminder that sometimes surviving the small stuff is just as dramatic as cheating death.Don't forget to subscribe to the podcast, rate us and share with your pals!Facebook: ⁠https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61581238112246⁠Instagram: ⁠https://www.instagram.com/mattersoftheheartpod/⁠TikTok: ⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@mattersoftheheartfailure⁠Youtube: ⁠https://www.youtube.com/@HeartandOtherFailuresPod

  10. 4

    E:03 - Discharge Notes & Dosette Boxes: Life After the Heart Drama

    In this heartfelt (and frequently ridiculous) third episode, Nathan Sparling and Scott Agnew pick up where the drama left off - exploring life after diagnosis, discharge, and near-death experiences. From being handed a mystery bag of pills to arguing over the correct way to pronounce words, the pair unpack the strange limbo of recovery with their usual blend of chaos and candour.They chat GPs (the good, the bad, and the utterly uninterested), dosette box pills the size of gobstoppers, and why the pharmacy queue is a uniquely Scottish endurance sport. Between tales of nose-blowing toddlers, dodgy neighbours, and emotional meltdowns in the doctor’s office, this episode finds humour in healing and friendship in failure.Expect laughs, oversharing, and a reminder that there’s always life - and laughter - after heart failure.Don't forget to subscribe to the podcast, rate us and share with your pals!Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61581238112246Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mattersoftheheartpod/TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@mattersoftheheartfailureYoutube: https://www.youtube.com/@HeartandOtherFailuresPod

  11. 3

    E:02 - Three Cardiac Arrests and a Council Dessert: Scott’s Heart Attack Story

    In this even bumpier second episode, Scott Agnew takes centre stage with the full, jaw-dropping account of his heart attack during the pandemic - from brushing off chest pains with pints and fags, to walking in to resus, to three cardiac arrests in the back of an ambulance. It’s a story of paramedics turned pals, emergency stents made on the fly, and a mum who didn't know what to say.Along the way, Nathan and Scott detour into broken feet dismissed as sprains, family slapstick outside taxis, and the generational divide between “banging tunes” and “skibbidy-rizz.” Expect equal parts gallows humour and genuine emotion as Scott relives the night Ruby Wax’s laugh quite literally kept him alive.This episode digs deeper into the reality of living through heart failure and cardiac trauma, while never losing sight of the comedy in life’s darkest moments. It’s raw, ridiculous, and real - proof that even in the middle of a medical emergency, you can still find a punchline (and maybe a Jubilee cup dessert).

  12. 2

    E:01 - A Beached Whale in Vauxhall: Heart Failure, Hospital Stays & Lemon Daiquiris

    In this bumper first episode, Nathan Sparling and Scott Agnew kick things off with the full story of how Nathan found out he had severe heart failure - following a boozy bike ride, a slow-motion crash, and a very unexpected diagnosis.They cover hospital panic attacks, fluid-filled lungs, the politics of salt, and how ChatGPT became a stand-in nurse. Plus, a Bell’s Palsy scare in Turkey, missing Eurovision, and the battle between Beck’s Blue and 0% mango IPAs.This episode sets the tone for the podcast - part comedy, part therapy, all chaos - as Scott joins officially as co-host and the pair begin their honest, no-filter journey through heart health and life’s many other failures.Expect medical mysteries, emotional truth bombs, and the kind of stories you’d overhear in a pub... if the pub was in a coronary care unit.

  13. 1

    The Trailer

    When 35-year-old Nathan found out he had heart failure in the most random way possible, he did what any millennial with a malfunctioning organ would do: he started a podcast.Matters of The Heart, and Other Failures is part health chat, part therapy, and part comedy - where Nathan sits down with comedian pals, paramedics, cardiology pros, and famous faces to talk about heart health… and all the other things that have nearly broken us.Honest, funny, and probably a bit inappropriate - because if you can’t laugh about fluid retention, what can you laugh about?Follow now - episodes launching soon.

Type above to search every episode's transcript for a word or phrase. Matches are scoped to this podcast.

Searching…

No matches for "" in this podcast's transcripts.

Showing of matches

No topics indexed yet for this podcast.

Loading reviews...

ABOUT THIS SHOW

Welcome to Matters of the Heart, and other Failures— the brutally honest, occasionally hilarious podcast where living with heart failure takes centre stage. Hosted by someone who knows the ups and downs of a dodgy ticker firsthand, each episode brings candid chats with coronary nurses, cardiologists, and fellow humans navigating heart conditions. It’s part education, part therapy, and part gallows humour — because when life hands you a malfunctioning heart, you might as well laugh (gently) about it.

HOSTED BY

Nathan

CATEGORIES

URL copied to clipboard!