Middle Fingers Up

In this episode, I sit down with  psychologist and writer Patty for a powerful conversation about the inner worlds of children of immigrants and how childhood conditioning continues to shape adult identity, relationships, and wellbeing.Patty brings both clinical expertise and lived experience as an Indian psychologist, a mother raising two biracial daughters, and someone navigating life and partnership across race and culture. Together, we  explore how obedience, guilt, silence, and sacrifice are often normalized in immigrant households and how those patterns quietly follow people into adulthood.This episode examines why so many children of immigrants grow up lacking language for their emotional experiences, how unprocessed conflict and missing repair shape anxiety and shame, and why saying “I turned out fine” often masks deeper burnout, disconnection, or physical symptoms. Rather than staying stuck in the past, the focus is on what healing can look like now and how doing this work impacts future generations.From parenting differently, to redefining responsibility and gratitude, to understanding how the body holds stress and trauma, this conversation invites listeners to get curious, question inherited narratives, and reclaim authorship over their own lives.If you grew up between cultures and have ever wondered “Where is this coming from?” or “Who am I outside of who I was taught to be?”, this episode offers language, validation, and a place to begin.Instagram: pjtemple7Website: pjtemple.comSupport the showIf you like what you hear please click on "subscribe" or "follow" -  It's free and you will get notified when the newest episodes are posted!  Check us out on Instagram, X, and YouTube @mfupodcast. Give feedback, middle finger recommendations as well as random thoughts to [email protected]. Thank you for listening!In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.

Wedding season is meant to be joyful, full of love, music, and celebration.However in this EP, we are naming what happens when you’re walking into those spaces carrying something else.A welcome back to guest to Mohini, who is here to share her experiences with  the in-between moments—the ones we don’t always name. The reality that you can be genuinely happy for someone you love… and still be grieving, questioning, or processing something in your own life at the same time.We get into what that actually looks like in real time, how unprocessed emotions don’t just disappear, they show up in the way we move, react, and cope. We also talk about the subtle (and not so subtle) ways divorced South Asian women are labeled in these spaces—and how that shapes the experience of being there.This isn’t about taking away from the celebration.It’s about giving ourselves permission to be honest about what we’re carrying while we’re in it.If you’ve ever felt like you had to be “fine” in a room where you weren’t… this one is for you. And if you know someone that maybe isn't as 'fine' as they say to be- check in on them. Like one of those "but how are you really doing" kind of check ins. Wedding season can be tough, divorce stigma is a real thing, and we all can bring a little extra compassion with us. You don’t have to be over it to show up. You just have to be honest about where you are.Instagram:  iammohinigimaCTA - This conversation doesn’t end here.If something landed for you, reach out to Mohini via IG—she’s open to hearing your story and continuing the dialogue.Support the showIf you like what you hear please click on "subscribe" or "follow" -  It's free and you will get notified when the newest episodes are posted!  Check us out on Instagram, X, and YouTube @mfupodcast. Give feedback, middle finger recommendations as well as random thoughts to [email protected]. Thank you for listening!In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.

Featured in The New Yorker and The Guardian, Sarah is a Nigerian child of immigrants, raised in the UK and now based in Canada, whose work as a cartoonist captures the quiet, in-between moments we don’t always have the language for.If you’ve ever found yourself in a room thinking, “why doesn’t this feel right anymore?”… this conversation will hit.We talk about what it means to make sense of ourselves in a world that once taught us to suppress more than we expressed. From the question of “Do I belong, or am I just fitting in?” to navigating identity as children of immigrants, this conversation moves through the layers of growth, culture, and the subtle shifts that shape how we show up in our relationships.Sarah shares how her art has become a mirror—especially for women of color—reflecting back the feelings so many of us carry but struggle to name. And I can say, she did exactly that for me.This is for the woman who feels in-between... and is learning to trust what she feels, even when she can’t fully explain it yet.Instagram: sarah_akinterinwaSupport the showIf you like what you hear please click on "subscribe" or "follow" -  It's free and you will get notified when the newest episodes are posted!  Check us out on Instagram, X, and YouTube @mfupodcast. Give feedback, middle finger recommendations as well as random thoughts to [email protected]. Thank you for listening!In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.

In this episode, I sit down with artist, mother, and fellow Randhawa, Harleen, to explore what happens when we stop performing the lives expected of us and start expressing our truth.Having immigrated to Canada as a baby, Harleen grew up in the in-between, navigating identity as a child of Indian immigrants while learning who she needed to be to belong. She shares her journey through body image struggles, fat shaming, and the pressure to be the “good girl, a version of herself shaped by family, culture, and the quiet weight of societal expectations.From writing a letter to God at 12 asking why she didn’t look “right,” to navigating grief after the loss of her mother, to leaving corporate work life  to pursue her art. This conversation is about unlearning. Unlearning the belief that our bodies are the problem. Unlearning the idea that being “good” matters more than being whole.We talk about how beauty standards are constructed and reinforced, why fatness is so often villainized, and how language, family dynamics, and systems like patriarchy and white supremacy quietly shape what women believe they’re allowed to be.We also explore what it means to mother yourself while raising daughters, to break cycles in real time, and to create a life where  'we' and the next generation don’t feel like we  have to disappear to be loved.At its core, this is a conversation about honoring your younger self, questioning the rules you were handed, and choosing joy, expression, and authenticity. Join the conversation:What’s one thing you’re ready to stop performing?Follow Harleen’s work:Instagram: harleen.illustratesSupport the showIf you like what you hear please click on "subscribe" or "follow" -  It's free and you will get notified when the newest episodes are posted!  Check us out on Instagram, X, and YouTube @mfupodcast. Give feedback, middle finger recommendations as well as random thoughts to [email protected]. Thank you for listening!In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.

A song comes on… and I’m not here anymore. I’m  in a neural time machine and 15 again. And I don’t just remember it—I feel it.In this episode, I sit down with Nikki—a therapist with a Master’s in Arts and Counselling, and who I like to refer to as the voice behind The Mental Health Stylist. She blends fashion, music, and therapeutic insight in a way that makes nostalgia feel… deeper.We talk about neural nostalgia—why music hits our body before our mind can catch up, and why the same songs can feel comforting… and heavier at the same time.Nikki also shares her story—from growing up in a small Alberta town to building a life and practice in BC—and the identity shifts that shaped her along the way.We get into:how identity lives in the body, not just our thoughtswhat women are really working through when it comes to identity and unlearningwhy we were taught to disconnect from our bodieswhat it means to outgrow versions of ourselves—but still feel attached to themAnd we don’t avoid the harder conversations—like what it means for white people, especially therapists, to show up with awareness, accountability, and a willingness to be uncomfortable.It’s reflective, honest, and one of those conversations that might make you pause the next time a song takes you back.If that’s ever happened to you—this one’s for you.What song takes you back in a neural time machine?Instagram: nikkiroy.collectionSupport the showIf you like what you hear please click on "subscribe" or "follow" -  It's free and you will get notified when the newest episodes are posted!  Check us out on Instagram, X, and YouTube @mfupodcast. Give feedback, middle finger recommendations as well as random thoughts to [email protected]. Thank you for listening!In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.

We say it all the time: “I’m just here for the music.”But… are we?In this episode, I sit down with Ali from @itsrealitywithali  to unpack something I’ve been thinking about a lot lately — how pop culture stopped being “just entertainment” and became a reflection of power, politics, and the systems shaping our everyday lives.This conversation actually started in my own home. My kids have been asking questions like, “What’s this celebrity’s controversy?” — and it made me realize how different things are from how we grew up.Now I find myself asking:Am I helping improve things… or just participating without thinking about it?Ali and I talk about what it really means to engage with the content we love — and how hard it can be to admit that “just entertainment” might not exist in the way we think it does. We get into the tension of separating the art from the artist, what it means to financially and socially support celebrities, and how influence, platforms, and power are all deeply connected.We also explore how identity and privilege shape that experience — why some people can disconnect more easily, while others are already navigating what it means to not be centered in those spaces.This isn’t about getting it perfect.It’s about asking:What am I engaging with?                      What am I supporting?And am I willing to look at it through a more critical lens?Instagram: itsrealitywithali (you can find Ali on Tik Tok and YouTube)Support the showIf you like what you hear please click on "subscribe" or "follow" -  It's free and you will get notified when the newest episodes are posted!  Check us out on Instagram, X, and YouTube @mfupodcast. Give feedback, middle finger recommendations as well as random thoughts to [email protected]. Thank you for listening!In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.

This episode is about shifting the way we think about our bodies — even as our day-to-day bumps up against old rules, comparisons, and messages (or should we say misogynies) we’ve inherited. We are here to challenge  the pressure to look a certain way, diet culture, celebrity trends, or "finishing the plate". It’s about noticing what our bodies are actually carrying and listening without shame.Have you ever looked in the mirror and thought, “How did my body get here?” Life happens: stress, grief, motherhood, getting older, carrying more than you used to. And yet the advice so many women hear is the same: eat less, move more.In this MFU gup shup, I sit down with returning guest Shuraya to talk about what our bodies really carry. Shuraya shares how losing her father showed up physically — from unexpected weight changes to a hypertension diagnosis — and how therapy helped her finally listen to her body and respond with care instead of guilt.We also discuss the ACEs tool (Adverse Childhood Experiences) and why early life stress and trauma can show up physically years later, shaping health in ways we rarely talk about.At the heart of this episode is one simple, radical idea: sometimes the better question isn’t what’s wrong with my body?Maybe the real question is: what has my body been carrying?Support the showIf you like what you hear please click on "subscribe" or "follow" -  It's free and you will get notified when the newest episodes are posted!  Check us out on Instagram, X, and YouTube @mfupodcast. Give feedback, middle finger recommendations as well as random thoughts to [email protected]. Thank you for listening!In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.

Safe space. You’ve heard the term everywhere lately — but what does it actually mean? Who is responsible for the 'safety' part of the space?In this gup shup, we sit with a phrase that shows up everywhere lately: safe space.From social media to wellness circles to community conversations, the language is everywhere — but the experience doesn’t always match the label.Looking at the roots of safe spaces in Black civil rights organizing, feminist consciousness-raising groups, and queer and trans communities, alongside trauma-informed practice and psychological safety research, we explore what it really means to hold space for one another.Historically, these spaces weren’t created to remove discomfort. They were created so people could speak honestly, question power, and sit with difficult truths without fear of punishment or harm.Because at the end of the day, safety comes before connection.Support the showIf you like what you hear please click on "subscribe" or "follow" -  It's free and you will get notified when the newest episodes are posted!  Check us out on Instagram, X, and YouTube @mfupodcast. Give feedback, middle finger recommendations as well as random thoughts to [email protected]. Thank you for listening!In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.

In this episode of Middle Fingers Up, we sit down with Rama Swamy, a pelvic floor practitioner and physiotherapist who immigrated from India, for a necessary and overdue conversation about women’s health — the parts we were never taught to understand, name, or advocate for.Drawing from her lived experience with pregnancy, birth, and postpartum recovery, Rama shares how cultural taboos, education gaps, and the normalization of women’s pain led her to specialize in pelvic health. Together, we unpack how silence — at home, in culture, in schools, and in healthcare systems — teaches women to endure rather than investigate what’s happening in their bodies.From the isolating period stories many South Asian women grew up with, to the ongoing fear around teaching children about bodies, hormones, and autonomy, this conversation challenges the idea that symptoms like chronic stress, mood swings, poor sleep, pain, or recurring infections are “just normal.”A key part of this episode focuses on teaching body literacy early — long before puberty or “the talk.” We explore how everyday moments, starting as young as diaper changes, can lay the foundation for consent, confidence, and body awareness, and how early education helps reduce shame, stigma, and delayed care later in life.This episode reframes women’s health as head-to-toe and deeply interconnected — where hormones affect sleep, mood, brain function, stress, and pelvic health — and why ignoring early signs doesn’t make them disappear, it simply pushes them further into the body. CTA:If you grew up in the dark about your body — or you’re trying to raise children with more honesty, language, and confidence than you were given — this episode is for you. Listen, share it with someone who needs it, and help us break the cycle of silence around women’s health, one conversation at a time.Instagram: _rama.swami_www.lakeviewphysio.cawww.healwithgrit.comSupport the showIf you like what you hear please click on "subscribe" or "follow" -  It's free and you will get notified when the newest episodes are posted!  Check us out on Instagram, X, and YouTube @mfupodcast. Give feedback, middle finger recommendations as well as random thoughts to [email protected]. Thank you for listening!In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.

In this episode of Middle Fingers Up, I’m in conversation with Farida D, author of The Shit That Made Me a Feminist — a body of work that names the lived realities many women are taught to swallow quietly.Out of respect for her safety, this episode is audio-only.  Farida’s work — which centers women of color, power, rage, and structural inequality — does not allow her the privilege of visibility without risk. And yet, she has chosen not to stop. She continues to speak, write, and show up for women, even when doing so requires navigating the cost of being seen.This conversation moves through the “shit” that made feminism unavoidable — the moments where being grateful was expected instead of being honest, where motherhood shocked the system, where rage became information, and where the bar for men ended exactly where it began for women.We talk about:Why we are all born feminist, long before we have language for itHow boys are given credit before they’re even bornWhy we do not choose our privileges or our oppressionsThe difference between having access to education but not access to safetyWhy this work is about structures, not individual peopleAnd why naming what’s happening is the first step to understanding itThis episode is a reminder to trust your rage, "to feel the fire already inside you"There is space for all of us — but not without truth.IG: @farida.d.author🎧 Audio-only episodeSupport the showIf you like what you hear please click on "subscribe" or "follow" -  It's free and you will get notified when the newest episodes are posted!  Check us out on Instagram, X, and YouTube @mfupodcast. Give feedback, middle finger recommendations as well as random thoughts to [email protected]. Thank you for listening!In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.

The one where we stop pretending everything’s fine just to keep the peace.In this episode, I sit down with Kam Bassier  (from Episode 136: “You’re Not Lazy, You’re Burnt Out”) to talk about a tension so many BIPOC adults are carrying right now:Why are we — the kids of immigrant parents, BIPOC millennials and Gen Z — having conversations our families never could?Why does naming pain feel like betrayal?And what does breaking cycles actually look like in real life?We talk about harmony culture in collectivist and immigrant families — where keeping the peace wasn’t about comfort, it was about survival and appearances.  But when harmony is prioritized over accountability, the emotional weight doesn’t disappear. It gets stored in our bodies and shows up later as burnout, people-pleasing, numbing, substance use, overworking, resentment, and silence in our marriages and parenting.This conversation isn’t about tearing our parents down.It’s about understanding what they couldn’t take responsibility for — so we don’t keep carrying it, and so we don’t pass it on to our kids.What we get into:Gratitude and grief can coexist — you can honor the sacrifices and name the emotional gapsWhy “they did their best” often shuts down real healingHow choosing peace over accountability trains us to minimize ourselvesWhy inner-child work isn’t cute — it’s necessaryRest, boundaries, and feeling all emotions (not just “happy”) as acts of resistanceA raw moment about quitting weed — not because it’s bad, but because numbing became easier than feelingNot everyone in your family will be ready for this work — and that’s okay. You don’t need permission to heal. The work may feel lonely, but it’s how cycles end and new ones begin.One thing to take away:You can love your family deeply and still choose healing over fake harmony.The next generation is watching what we do with what we were handed.Instagram:  kambassierSupport the showIf you like what you hear please click on "subscribe" or "follow" -  It's free and you will get notified when the newest episodes are posted!  Check us out on Instagram, X, and YouTube @mfupodcast. Give feedback, middle finger recommendations as well as random thoughts to [email protected]. Thank you for listening!In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.

Taken from South Korea as a baby, removed from his culture, and told it’s for a “better life” that he "wasn't wanted".  This is the reality behind many international adoptions.In this episode, I speak with Moses, a therapist, advocate, and human being whose lived experience gives him a unique perspective on how 'adoption' functions as an industry of child trafficking. Through his work, he challenges the narratives that frame removal as rescue, and exposes how children are commodified, displaced, and erased for profit.We explore commodification: turning human beings, culture, and lived experience into something that can be bought, sold, or managed, stripping away history and rights.We also confront a common question: Isn’t it better to give an unwanted child a “good North American life”? Moses explains why this belief is a false narrative that assumes Western life is superior, erases the abuse many children experience, and leaves some struggling with trauma so severe that many have taken their own lives.This episode challenges the fantasy, the brainwashing, and the language that normalizes global-scale harm, asking listeners to see 'adoption' for what it often is: a system that commodifies children and erases their histories.Instagram: mosesafarrowsocietyforadoptiontruth.orgthetruthguide.comSupport the showIf you like what you hear please click on "subscribe" or "follow" -  It's free and you will get notified when the newest episodes are posted!  Check us out on Instagram, X, and YouTube @mfupodcast. Give feedback, middle finger recommendations as well as random thoughts to [email protected]. Thank you for listening!In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.

I came across Shawn Ahmed’s work the way so many of us do now — through a moment of laughter that quietly turned into curiosity. What followed was a conversation that went far deeper than comedy.Shawn is a South Asian Canadian actor with an impressive body of work across television, film, and comedy — and in this episode, we talk about what lives beneath the credits. Growing up in that in-between space — being Canadian while being raised by immigrant parents — and how that lived experience shapes creativity, confidence, and the risks we take.We explore what it means to choose a path that isn’t considered “safe,” how family support shows up in subtle ways, and what early auditions teach you about how the world sees you before you even speak. We also get into the tension many South Asian artists face: wanting the freedom to play roles not defined by race, while knowing that representation still matters — especially for the kids watching from the sidelines, wondering what’s possible for them.This conversation isn’t about arriving at neat answers. It’s about staying in relationship with yourself, trusting your voice, and giving yourself permission to want more — even when it doesn’t match the script you were handed.If you’ve ever felt caught between worlds, expectations, or versions of yourself — this one will land.Instagram: iamshawnahmedSupport the showIf you like what you hear please click on "subscribe" or "follow" -  It's free and you will get notified when the newest episodes are posted!  Check us out on Instagram, X, and YouTube @mfupodcast. Give feedback, middle finger recommendations as well as random thoughts to [email protected]. Thank you for listening!In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.

We’ve all been in rooms where the energy doesn’t match the claim of being a safe space -  overthinking, comparing, and surface-level talk are what tends to go down instead. I sat down with Arunie, Psychologist with PCHS Calgary and co-host of Brown Girl Problems, for a conversation that goes beyond surface-level chats. Arunie highlights the truth behind the pressure to turn trauma into currency, and what it takes to build connection and support beyond the surface. We explore what brown women are tired of carrying, what we’re quietly unlearning together, and how to show up for each other -  listening deeply, celebrating honestly, and supporting without competing, comparing, or explaining ourselves. Arunie 's MFU is a CTA in how we are showing up as a community. Instagram: browngirlproblems.podcastSupport the showIf you like what you hear please click on "subscribe" or "follow" -  It's free and you will get notified when the newest episodes are posted!  Check us out on Instagram, X, and YouTube @mfupodcast. Give feedback, middle finger recommendations as well as random thoughts to [email protected]. Thank you for listening!In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.

Reshma Kearney returns to Middle Fingers Up following Episode 128, where she first shared her experience of losing her husband to suicide and raising three children through grief. In this conversation, we go deeper — into what grief looks like over time, how it lives in the body, and how it quietly shapes our mental health, parenting, and sense of self.We talk about grief as an ongoing relationship rather than something to “get over,” how Reshma’s trauma-informed yoga and mindfulness work has evolved, and what she’s learning as a mother raising one son and two daughters through loss. We explore gendered grief, breaking South Asian cultural silence, emotional safety for boys, and what it means to raise the next generation with more permission to feel.This episode is about breath, stillness, boundaries, and the courage to protect your peace — especially during transitions and the holidays. It’s about what grief takes, what it gives, and what we carry forward.Because grief isn’t linear — and healing doesn’t mean forgetting.Find Reshma on Instagram reshmakearney for more on her work and family updates.Short, practical reminder: grief is about what we carry forward as much as what we’ve lost.Support the showIf you like what you hear please click on "subscribe" or "follow" -  It's free and you will get notified when the newest episodes are posted!  Check us out on Instagram, X, and YouTube @mfupodcast. Give feedback, middle finger recommendations as well as random thoughts to [email protected]. Thank you for listening!In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.

In this episode of Middle Fingers Up, we sit down with Rahell, a 23-year-old mixed-race individual navigating identity, privilege, and growth.Rahell shares his experience as a “passing white kid” unpacking whiteness — what it meant to belong in some spaces, and what it cost in others. He talks about how hip-hop shaped his understanding of culture, power, and resistance, and the ongoing work of unlearning misogyny with honesty and accountability.From childhood experiences in hockey and school that exposed racial divides, to reflections on survival, community-building, and responsibility in anti-racism work, this conversation explores the in-between spaces many mixed-race people live in.As Rahell says, “We are not math problems.” Identity isn’t something to calculate or explain away — it’s something lived. He challenges listeners to move beyond surface-level allyship and ask, “What do I actually want from societal change?”And for anyone listening who considers themselves aware, supportive, or “one of the good ones,” this episode quietly asks:If the people most impacted by your actions feel dismissed, exhausted, or blamed — is it possible your intention to help is getting in the way of your ability to listen?Whether you’re mixed-race, raising mixed kids, or reflecting on your own identity and blind spots, this episode offers an honest dialogue on healing and what it means to show up with integrity. New episodes drop regularly—subscribe now on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or your favorite platform!Instagram:  rahell_theg.o.a.t23Support the showIf you like what you hear please click on "subscribe" or "follow" -  It's free and you will get notified when the newest episodes are posted!  Check us out on Instagram, X, and YouTube @mfupodcast. Give feedback, middle finger recommendations as well as random thoughts to [email protected]. Thank you for listening!In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.

In this episode of Middle Fingers Up, I sit  down with Nisha Mody, the relational and trauma-informed coach known online as Healing Hype Girl. Nisha shares her raw journey from a childhood marked by strict expectations and silenced playfulness to navigating codependency in a marriage to an addict, ultimately choosing divorce, childfree living, and reclaiming her voice. Together, we get into the common struggles of South Asian women—living on autopilot, breaking harmful cycles from family conditioning, and creating new norms rooted in self-worth, boundaries, and joy.Nisha offers practical insights on unlearning people-pleasing, identifying core values, and fostering interdependence in relationships, while touching on broader themes like global impact post-October 7th, consumerism, and collective healing. Whether you're an overthinker seeking clarity or ready to disrupt patriarchal patterns, Nisha's story and tools will inspire you to meet yourself where you're at and embrace radical self-expression.Tune in for reflections, actionable advice, and a teaser for part two on patriarchy, misogyny, and modern dating. Follow Nisha on Instagram and TikTok @healinghypegirl for more on her upcoming memoir, coaching programs, and Substack Memoirs of Amnesia. What cycles are you ready to break?Support the showIf you like what you hear please click on "subscribe" or "follow" -  It's free and you will get notified when the newest episodes are posted!  Check us out on Instagram, X, and YouTube @mfupodcast. Give feedback, middle finger recommendations as well as random thoughts to [email protected]. Thank you for listening!In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.

Be A Tiger is an episode about what it really means to grow up as a South Asian girl who’s told to be strong… while also being told to stay quiet, stay small, and don’t make anyone uncomfortable.In this conversation with award-winning author Kelly Kaur, we step into the world of Letters to Singapore through Simran — this young brown girl who is trying to hold herself together as an immigrant student from Singapore to Calgary in the 80's. As if the adjustment as a new comer isn't enough, Simran is also juggling carrying family expectations, culture, patriarchy, and a kind of freedom she wasn’t prepared for.We talk about that early line her father gives her — “Be a tiger” — and how that message changes as we grow up. What it means to be a tiger as a girl, what it means as a woman, and what it means when you finally start choosing yourself.And we go into the things we all know but rarely say out loud:• What it meant in the ’80s to “stand out in front of white people” — and the survival skills coded into that• What happens when you suddenly have freedom after being raised with none• How our older women — who were once the bullied ones — can become the gatekeepers• How patriarchy follows us from our parents’ homes straight into our marriages• And what today’s immigrant students are actually facing — the racism, the headlines, the sound bites that blame them for everything while erasing the systems exploiting themThis episode is for every woman who grew up in-between… shapeshifting,for the ones who learned to roar quietly…and the ones who are setting the example to roar out loud. This episode is also for the brave man who wants to address his misogyny and set an example for the next generation. (We know you are out there )Follow Kelly on Instagram: @kellykaur3Support the showIf you like what you hear please click on "subscribe" or "follow" -  It's free and you will get notified when the newest episodes are posted!  Check us out on Instagram, X, and YouTube @mfupodcast. Give feedback, middle finger recommendations as well as random thoughts to [email protected]. Thank you for listening!In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.

Before we get into this episode, I want to name something real: there’s a moment in life when grief meets growth. Our guest Shri lived that moment. And today, she’s helping us understand it.Grief has a way of interrupting your life—but life never stops interrupting your grief.My guest today, Shri, knows this intimately.Within 18 months, she lost her father and sister… all while she was pregnant with her daughter.Imagine grief and life entering the room at the same time. That collision changed her. It made her choose something most of us avoid:To stop functioning.And start truly living.Before you listen, I want to ask you one thing:“When was the last time you told yourself the truth about how much you’ve been carrying?”Sit with that. Because this episode is going to meet you right there.We talk about the things people don’t say out loud:           *Is it okay that I’m still crying?           * Why do I feel guilty for slowing down?           *Why does grief feel like I’m failing at life?                                                                           * How do I grieve when I’m a mother, a partner, a daughter — all at once?Shri and I unpack the myths we inherited — “be strong,” “move on,” “don’t feel too much” — and how they keep us stuck and disconnected from ourselves.We dive into South Asian conditioning, the guilt that comes with choice and privilege, and the embodied ways grief stays alive in us long after the world thinks we’re “fine.”Some of Shri’s words you’ll hear:“Grief is a life force.”“You already have everything it takes to heal.”“There is no timeline to grief.”This episode is your reminder that you’re allowed to be human.You’re allowed to feel.You’re allowed to slow down.And you’re allowed to heal without performing strength for anyone.If you’ve been running from your grief… let this conversation be the moment you turn toward it — gently, honestly, and maybe for the first time, supported.Instagram: transforming.through.griefSupport the showIf you like what you hear please click on "subscribe" or "follow" -  It's free and you will get notified when the newest episodes are posted!  Check us out on Instagram, X, and YouTube @mfupodcast. Give feedback, middle finger recommendations as well as random thoughts to [email protected]. Thank you for listening!In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.

In this gup shup, I want to talk about something we don’t talk about enough —rebuilding our relationship with ourselves during perimenopause.Not the charts.Not the protein grams.Not the supplements or the workouts.Those matter — trust me, I’m on top of them.But I’m realizing I’m ready to focus on something deeper:How do I stay in relationship with myself while everything in me is shifting?Mood swings? Check.Brain fog? Check.Zero patience? Check.Crying in the laundry room? Check.Feeling like your body isn’t yours? Check.This is perimenopause.This is hormones rewriting the rules without asking for permission.Progesterone (pro-JESS-ter-own — the hormone that’s supposed to chill us out) drops. Hard.When it drops?Anxiety spikes.Sleep tanking.Irritability shooting up.Body stores fat differently.Joints ache.Libido shifts.Stress response goes haywire.Emotions sit right under your skin — raw, reactive, ready.And we’re still expected to “function normally.”This phase calls us back to the relationship we have with ourselves — right now, in this body, in this season.Not the old version of us.Not the one patriarchy shaped.This version.This hormonal tornado.This woman who’s trying, learning, changing, holding so much.And if you’re going through this “second puberty” with a male partner — here’s a quick heads-up for him:Listen. Step up. Be the safe place. Learn what’s happening inside her.That’s my gup shup.That’s where I’m at.And if you’re here too — you’re not alone.Support the showIf you like what you hear please click on "subscribe" or "follow" -  It's free and you will get notified when the newest episodes are posted!  Check us out on Instagram, X, and YouTube @mfupodcast. Give feedback, middle finger recommendations as well as random thoughts to [email protected]. Thank you for listening!In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.

In this episode of Middle Fingers Up, I sit down with Christian Ortiz — Afro-Indigenous social scientist, technologist, and creator of Justice AIGPT — and this conversation hit me on so many levels.Christian grew up as a latchkey kid in 80s/90s Los Angeles and later confronted internalized racism, machismo, and white supremacy in the American South. With  a fierce single mother, and a lifetime of asking “why?” shaped a mission bigger than tech: challenging the systems that shape us before they erase us.This isn’t just a conversation about AI — it’s about identity, conviction, and the systems that shape our daily lives in ways we barely notice. We talk about how much AI is already embedded in our day-to-day, from the feeds we scroll to the faucets we wash our hands under — and how often we think these systems are broken, when really they were never built to recognize people like us.Christian breaks down how bias is coded into these tools, why decolonizing technology is not a luxury but a form of survival, and what it means for BIPOC communities. What I loved most? He doesn’t lecture. He doesn’t sugarcoat. He tells his story — and in doing so, holds up a mirror.You’ll walk away questioning the systems you’ve trusted, the stories you’ve inherited, and the parts of yourself you’ve outgrown. And you’ll hear the conviction behind his words: “If I can change, there’s no way in hell you can’t.”This episode is for anyone ready to question, reflect, and see how our voices need to be at the table shaping the future — not erased by it.JusticeAIGPT - www.justiceaigpt.caInstagram: zacatechoLinktree - OfficialChristianOrtizSupport the showIf you like what you hear please click on "subscribe" or "follow" -  It's free and you will get notified when the newest episodes are posted!  Check us out on Instagram, X, and YouTube @mfupodcast. Give feedback, middle finger recommendations as well as random thoughts to [email protected]. Thank you for listening!In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.

Ever feel guilty for not feeling festive?The holidays are sold as sparkle and joy — and honestly, it starts in August the moment the gingerbread hits store shelves. The holiday decor floods every aisle...But for many of us, what follows isn’t joy. It’s guilt — spiraling that we’re falling behind and it’s only mid-summer — overstimulation, pressure to spend, perform, and somehow stay grateful while losing our minds.Maybe it’s the Secret Santa gift that assumes your culture (“Indian chai” for the brown girl — like, we like winter pine candles too ).Maybe it’s the small talk that pokes at your job, your relationship, or the kids you don’t have.Maybe it’s hiding your pronouns, your sexuality, or the truth about who you love — just to keep the peace.Maybe it’s the drinks at every gathering — not because you want them, but because refusing feels too complicated when family, tension, and history are on the table.Or maybe it’s that post-holiday crash, when the quiet hits harder than the chaos.This week, founder of Lotus Pathways, Psychotherapist, Shagun Sharma returns to unpack the guilt and obligation so many of us carry- How overstimulation and social fatigue drain our nervous systems- The blurry line between celebration and numbing out- How to prepare for the post-holiday blues — without shameYou don’t owe anyone your sparkle or your performance.Just be present with where you’re at.Tune in. Breathe. Be.Instagram: lotuspathwaysLinktr.ee: lotuspathwaysWebsite: lotuspathwayspsychotherapy.comSupport the showIf you like what you hear please click on "subscribe" or "follow" -  It's free and you will get notified when the newest episodes are posted!  Check us out on Instagram, X, and YouTube @mfupodcast. Give feedback, middle finger recommendations as well as random thoughts to [email protected]. Thank you for listening!In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.

This one made me laugh, pause, and think.I get to sit down and really get to know Calgary comedian and Planet Jerf host Jeff D'Silva—the stories behind his humor, how he sees the world, and the experiences that shaped him. We talk about biracial parenting, Calgary mall culture, and what it was like growing up Pakistani-Canadian in the 80s.I first came across Jeff after hearing his viral South Centre Mall song—the one calling out how white Calgarians “go there to get away from us POC.” It’s funny, sharp, and uncomfortable in the best way. And I knew I had to talk to him.We get into the identity tightrope of being between worlds, what it’s like getting racism from both brown and white folks, and how raising empathetic kids might just be the biggest act of resistance and love.Listen for:The South Centre Mall song that started it allReal talk on biracial parenting and identityHow comedy can challenge and connect usThis one’s for anyone who’s ever questioned where they fit—and learned to find belonging on their own terms.Instagram: jeffdsilvaSupport the showIf you like what you hear please click on "subscribe" or "follow" -  It's free and you will get notified when the newest episodes are posted!  Check us out on Instagram, X, and YouTube @mfupodcast. Give feedback, middle finger recommendations as well as random thoughts to [email protected]. Thank you for listening!In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.

 Have you ever asked yourself why so many of us first-gens ended up dating or marrying white people? I have!  I see now that our immigrant parents’ survival strategies — keeping your head down, working hard, staying small — shaped ours. And for our generation, that survival often meant assimilation, performing the “white version” of ourselves — at work, in friendships, even in love.In this intimate gup shup, I want you to know: you are not alone. Naming what’s happening, sharing our experiences together, and unpacking these survival strategies is necessary. I share what it’s like to wake up and realize we were digested, not seen — and how doing this deep work can actually strengthen relationships with white partners who met us as the “white version” of ourselves.If we are raising biracial kids, this work becomes even more important. The more we understand ourselves, the more we can show them authenticity, self-respect, and the courage to claim their identity fully.It’s messy. It’s uncomfortable. But it’s necessary. Thriving doesn’t come from performing. It comes from standing fully in your truth, holding space for your partner, and building a foundation for the next generation to grow strong and confident in who they are. Support the showIf you like what you hear please click on "subscribe" or "follow" -  It's free and you will get notified when the newest episodes are posted!  Check us out on Instagram, X, and YouTube @mfupodcast. Give feedback, middle finger recommendations as well as random thoughts to [email protected]. Thank you for listening!In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.

Hey everyone, quick question — when was the last time you really talked about periods? Not whispered, not joked about… I mean honest, open, real talk.If that made you pause, this one’s for you — and for the men in our lives too: dads, brothers, partners, sons… anyone who wants to understand better.Dr. Anne  invited me to sit down with her as part of her month-long speaker series celebrating her book "The Period Literacy Handbook"  turning one — now available as an audiobook — and since then, she’s launched her podcast, Phase to Phase: The Hormone Health Show.We dug into some of the things we were never taught, the things we sometimes hide, and the ways we can start changing the conversation at home. Some of it might surprise you.So whether you bleed or love someone who does, this conversation is for you. It’s not a flaw — it’s flowFollow Dr. Anne and Listen to her health show :LinktreeInstagram Support the showIf you like what you hear please click on "subscribe" or "follow" -  It's free and you will get notified when the newest episodes are posted!  Check us out on Instagram, X, and YouTube @mfupodcast. Give feedback, middle finger recommendations as well as random thoughts to [email protected]. Thank you for listening!In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.

You ever meet someone who reminds you that healing doesn’t always happen in therapy — sometimes it happens in the kitchen?In this episode of Middle Fingers Up, Kiran Randhawa sits down with Bengali home cook, mother, and storyteller Shuraya Bhatti, whose journey from grief to growth will make you rethink what it means to take care of yourself.After losing her father, Shuraya turned to food — not just to cook, but to connect. What started as a way to honor her roots became a space where strangers walk into her home and leave as community. Together, we talk about the power of slowing down, how ADHD shaped her work and motherhood, and why immigrant women need to stop apologizing for resting.You’ll walk away thinking about:How grief can actually spark creativity and connectionThe freedom that comes when you let yourself be imperfectWhy taking a long shower isn’t selfish — it’s survivalHow storytelling, community, and self-compassion help us heal what we never got to nameThis conversation isn’t about cooking — it’s about coming home to yourself.Raw. Honest. Exactly what you didn’t know you needed today.Connect with Shuraya:Find her at shurayaskitchen.ca, on Instagram and Facebook (@shurayaskitchen), and at her monthly cooking classes in Calgary.Support the showIf you like what you hear please click on "subscribe" or "follow" -  It's free and you will get notified when the newest episodes are posted!  Check us out on Instagram, X, and YouTube @mfupodcast. Give feedback, middle finger recommendations as well as random thoughts to [email protected]. Thank you for listening!In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.

Join Kiran Randhawa as she sits down with Mano Mishra, a community leader, yoga teacher, and advocate for women’s health and immigrant voices. Mano shares her journey from Uttar Pradesh, India, to building a new life in Calgary—facing isolation, career setbacks, and the challenges of starting over. Through her story, Mano reveals how volunteering, yoga, and a commitment to kindness helped her overcome depression and create supportive spaces for women navigating menopause, mental health, and life transitions.In this conversation, Mano discusses breaking cultural taboos, the importance of self-compassion, and why acceptance and gentle movement are essential for well-being at any age. Whether you’re seeking inspiration, practical advice, or a reminder of the power of community, this episode is for you.Key themes: immigrant resilience, women’s health, menopause, yoga, mental health, breaking stigma, self-compassion, community support.Instagram: yog_yogstudioSupport the showIf you like what you hear please click on "subscribe" or "follow" -  It's free and you will get notified when the newest episodes are posted!  Check us out on Instagram, X, and YouTube @mfupodcast. Give feedback, middle finger recommendations as well as random thoughts to [email protected]. Thank you for listening!In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.

In this episode of Middle Fingers Up, host Kiran Randhawa sits down with community consultant, speaker, and Catalyst podcast host Nike Aurea for a deep dive into what it truly means to build and belong in community—beyond convenience and into real responsibility. As a first-generation daughter of West African immigrants, Nike shares how her upbringing in Atlanta shaped her unapologetic approach to advocacy and self-advocacy. "I always knew where I was from. I always knew about the food, the culture, language and with that also the history," she reflects, crediting her parents for instilling a strong sense of self through intentional storytelling and exposure to global histories, like films on South African apartheid.The conversation explores the intersections of education, care, and strategy, challenging listeners to rethink belonging. Nike disrupts common narratives around "mammification"—the expectation placed on Black women to carry endless emotional labor.Tune in for an inspiring discussion on unlearning stereotypes, setting boundaries with grace, and why "clarity is care" in fostering thriving spaces. If you've ever questioned your role in community or felt the weight of unspoken expectations, this episode will leave you empowered to show up authentically.Instagram: nikeaureaSupport the showIf you like what you hear please click on "subscribe" or "follow" -  It's free and you will get notified when the newest episodes are posted!  Check us out on Instagram, X, and YouTube @mfupodcast. Give feedback, middle finger recommendations as well as random thoughts to [email protected]. Thank you for listening!In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.

Join host Kiran Randhawa on Middle Fingers Up for a heartfelt conversation with Shagun Sharma, registered psychotherapist and founder of Lotus Pathways. In this episode, Shagun shares her journey from a curious six-year-old in downtown Toronto's Cabbagetown neighborhood—where she first witnessed the realities of homelessness and mental health struggles—to becoming a trailblazer in culturally sensitive therapy. "I wanted to be a therapist since I was six years old," Shagun reflects, inspired by her older sister's guidance and her own immigrant roots as a South Asian woman. Together, they dive into dismantling mental health stigmas in immigrant and South Asian communities, exploring barriers like self-judgment, high costs, and generational pressures that prioritize "protection, protection, protection" over open emotional discussions. Shagun emphasizes creating "spaces that are culturally safe and validating where people can genuinely begin to untangle" intergenerational burdens, while addressing how social media and collective cultural norms often leave individuals feeling isolated. Whether you're navigating your own mental health path or seeking to understand systemic challenges, this episode offers validating insights on building rapport, normalizing therapy, and fostering community support. Tune in for an honest look at why "get over it" narratives persist and how we can collectively tackle them.Instagram: lotuspathwaysLinktr.ee: lotuspathwaysWebsite: lotuspathwayspsychotherapy.comSupport the showIf you like what you hear please click on "subscribe" or "follow" -  It's free and you will get notified when the newest episodes are posted!  Check us out on Instagram, X, and YouTube @mfupodcast. Give feedback, middle finger recommendations as well as random thoughts to [email protected]. Thank you for listening!In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.

In this episode of Middle Fingers Up, host Kiran Randhawa sits down with Kam Bassier—fitness and life coach, father, husband, and self-proclaimed student of life—to unpack the emotional and physical toll of burnout and the radical power of rest.Kam’s story begins in Guyana, shaped by intergenerational trauma, hustle culture, and the immigrant grind. But what makes this conversation unforgettable is Kam’s vulnerability and wisdom as he reflects on his journey from survival mode to intentional living.“We’ve been plopped on Earth with no manual,” Kam says. “So I’m just trying to figure out the best way to go about this thing.”Together, Kiran and Kam explore how our childhood scripts—especially those rooted in immigrant households—shape our adult lives. From the glorification of hustle to the shame around rest, Kam challenges listeners to rethink what it means to be productive.“No one is going to tell you to slow down,” Kam warns. “You have to choose it. You have to disrupt the pattern.”This episode is a masterclass in nervous system regulation, inner child work, and redefining self-worth. Kam shares tangible tools for getting unstuck, including the power of sleep, body scans, and intentional boundaries.“Healing isn’t nice—it’s necessary,” Kam reminds us. “And rest isn’t laziness. It’s survival.”Whether you’re a burnt-out parent, a high-achieving professional, or someone simply trying to feel better in your body, this conversation will leave you full—like a nourishing meal that doesn’t need dessert.What You’ll Learn:Why rest is harder than hustle—and how to change thatHow immigrant narratives shape our relationship with workThe link between nervous system regulation and emotional resiliencePractical ways to disrupt your daily patterns and reclaim your energyWhy healing requires conscious engagement, not just reflectionGuest Info: Follow Kam Bassier on Instagram, TikTok, and YouTube @kambassier. Kam helps burnt-out adults build sustainable routines that support their physical, emotional, and relational health.Support the showIf you like what you hear please click on "subscribe" or "follow" -  It's free and you will get notified when the newest episodes are posted!  Check us out on Instagram, X, and YouTube @mfupodcast. Give feedback, middle finger recommendations as well as random thoughts to [email protected]. Thank you for listening!In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.

In this episode of Middle Fingers Up, host Kiran Randhawa sits down with multi-award-winning author and speaker Kalyani Pardeshi to unpack the hidden layers of self-bullying, inner critics, and the emotional legacy of growing up in immigrant households. From confronting toxic family dynamics to redefining success and self-worth, Kalyani shares raw, relatable stories and transformative insights that challenge cultural norms and empower listeners to reclaim their mental wellness.Whether you're navigating guilt, burnout, or the pressure to perform, this conversation offers a compassionate roadmap to healing and growth. As Kalyani says, “You’re not what you do. You’re not what you have. If you keep seeking your worth in that, you’re setting yourself up for a lifetime of unhappiness.”Books: "Beyond The  Inner Critic - Identify where you are being the villan in your own story""UNBULLIED"- 14 techniques to silence the critics internally and externally Instagram: kalyanispeaks049Linktree @kalyanispeaksSupport the showIf you like what you hear please click on "subscribe" or "follow" -  It's free and you will get notified when the newest episodes are posted!  Check us out on Instagram, X, and YouTube @mfupodcast. Give feedback, middle finger recommendations as well as random thoughts to [email protected]. Thank you for listening!In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.

This isn’t just another parenting conversation. It’s a raw, honest look at what happens when the triggers of childhood meet the triggers of parenting.In this episode, I sit down with Shuraya Akhter Bhatti—a Bengali home cook, curry class entertainer, and soulful storyteller with a gift for making the hard stuff human. Through the beautiful metaphor of a tiffin, we unpack the emotional layers we all carry: trauma, transition, and the healing work we owe ourselves and our kids. From navigating ADHD at home to breaking free from intergenerational cycles, Shuraya doesn’t hold back. “Kids are walking trigger bombs,” she says, “and every parent will be triggered in some way. Let’s talk about it.”This conversation will make you laugh, make you think, and maybe even make you cry. But more importantly—it will remind you that healing is possible, and repair is always within reach.“You can’t heal your kids if you haven’t started healing yourself.” “We’re not just parenting our kids—we’re parenting ourselves and our parents.” “Be kind. Start with yourself.”If you’ve ever wondered why parenting feels so hard—or how to actually build more empathy, regulation, and connection in your home—this episode is your tiffin. Full of wisdom. Full of heart. Full of truth.Instagram: @shurayaskitchenSupport the showIf you like what you hear please click on "subscribe" or "follow" -  It's free and you will get notified when the newest episodes are posted!  Check us out on Instagram, X, and YouTube @mfupodcast. Give feedback, middle finger recommendations as well as random thoughts to [email protected]. Thank you for listening!In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.

"At Least It’s Not Worse…” — Why We Rush Gratitude and Skip Our FeelingsWe’ve all done it.Someone shares they’re struggling, and we say:“Well, at least it’s not…”But what are we actually doing when we say that?In this  Gup Shup, I’m unpacking how this reflex comes from both our brains and our cultures — and how it might be doing more harm than good.-Why we rush to be grateful- How the brain tries to protect us- What we miss when we skip feelings-And why we’re giving middle fingers up to guilt-based gratitudeSupport the showIf you like what you hear please click on "subscribe" or "follow" -  It's free and you will get notified when the newest episodes are posted!  Check us out on Instagram, X, and YouTube @mfupodcast. Give feedback, middle finger recommendations as well as random thoughts to [email protected]. Thank you for listening!In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.

 I can’t tell you how many times I’ve said that—“I’m so tired… but I didn’t even do that much today.” And for so many of us, especially in immigrant communities, that kind of tiredness isn’t physical—it’s emotional.It’s what happens when we’re constantly absorbing other people’s moods, guilt, frustration, disappointment… and calling it caring. We talk about physical boundaries—saying no, doing less, taking space. But we rarely talk about emotional boundaries. The kind that help us shield our hearts. That allow emotional separation from the people we love, so we don’t lose ourselves trying to carry everything they feel.In this episode, I share what I’ve learned—through conversations, therapy, and my own lived experience—about emotional overfunctioning, how it drains us, and how we can slowly start doing things differently.This isn’t about cutting people off. It’s about knowing what’s yours to hold—and what isn’t.So if you’ve been feeling low, confused, or tired without a clear reason… I invite you to listen. This one’s especially for the ones who were raised to “just adjust.”You deserve to feel light again.Support the showIf you like what you hear please click on "subscribe" or "follow" -  It's free and you will get notified when the newest episodes are posted!  Check us out on Instagram, X, and YouTube @mfupodcast. Give feedback, middle finger recommendations as well as random thoughts to [email protected]. Thank you for listening!In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.

Healing as South Asians often means navigating a mental health system shaped by whiteness — one that often fails to see us. After parting ways with a white friend who is also a therapist, I began questioning: is it that we resist help, or that the help we’re offered was never built for us?And here’s the harder truth: many working within this system — including people of colour — don’t fully recognize how deeply whiteness shapes the frameworks we call “care.” Too often, this system offers a one-size-fits-all approach that doesn’t reflect our histories, cultures, or lived experiences. But unless those working in mental health commit to doing the deeper work — genuinely examining their own whiteness and how little is truly understood about clients of colour — these patterns will continue. Too many claim awareness but fall short of real accountability. The result? Many South Asians who need and deserve support are left unseen, underserved, or made to feel that healing is out of reach.Often this harm isn’t intentional, but unless we do the deeper work, we risk reproducing it while trying to help. It’s a slippery slope. This Gup Shup is for anyone ready to rethink what true support looks like when we center our own voices and ways of healing. Support the showIf you like what you hear please click on "subscribe" or "follow" -  It's free and you will get notified when the newest episodes are posted!  Check us out on Instagram, X, and YouTube @mfupodcast. Give feedback, middle finger recommendations as well as random thoughts to [email protected]. Thank you for listening!In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.

It’s just you and me in this It’s Good To Gup Shup segment — a space for reflection, reclamation, and real talk. This episode was sparked by Sinners, a film that made me feel seen in someone else’s story. And that whisper of huge validation? It stayed in my bones.From Late Bloomer and Mo to Monkey Man, we’re talking about the daily contradictions of being brown in a white world. We’re finally putting language to those gut feelings. When stories no longer ask for permission — when creativity meets what’s happening in the world — you see heroes being born.This isn’t about representation for approval. It’s about zero f*cks and zero fear. It’s about owning the parts of us we were told to shrink. It’s about coming back to the things we mocked before we knew better.Because we are greater together. And I’ll ask you what I had to ask myself:When was the last time a story made you feel seen?Sinners (2025) -  Directed by Ryan CooglerBend it Like Beckham (2002) - Directed by Gurinder Chadha (available to stream)Late Bloomer (2024) - Created by Jasmeet Raina Monkey Man(2024) - Directed by Dev PatelMo (2022) - Created by Mo Amer and Ramy YoussefSupport the showIf you like what you hear please click on "subscribe" or "follow" -  It's free and you will get notified when the newest episodes are posted!  Check us out on Instagram, X, and YouTube @mfupodcast. Give feedback, middle finger recommendations as well as random thoughts to [email protected]. Thank you for listening!In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.

I sit down with Dr. Ami, a holistic hormone pharmacist who’s not just a clinician — she’s lived the journey. From missed periods and persistent acne to the emotional weight of feeling dismissed, she knows firsthand what many South Asian women silently endure.Together, we unpack the deep and often overlooked intersections of hormones, healing, and honesty — and explore what PCOS is really costing South Asian women. The truth? It's not just about skipped cycles or fertility struggles. It's about mental health, identity, and generations of shame wrapped up in silence.While birth control is often handed out as a band-aid, it’s really just been masking symptoms that deserved deeper care. And for many of us, our stories didn’t need more medication — they needed to be heard.This episode is also a gentle (and sometimes not-so-gentle) invitation to our male partners: you aren’t just background characters in our hormone health stories. Whether it’s showing up in doctor’s visits, learning about our cycles, or unlearning assumptions — your role matters.Dr. Ami now supports South Asian women all over the world in reclaiming their hormone health, fertility, and sense of self — with personalized, holistic care that listens and understands.From the beauty of periods to the myth that motherhood is our only calling, Dr. Ami reminds us that we can’t out-medicate a lifestyle, and that healing starts with presence. With compassion and clarity, she helps us rethink what it means to rest, reconnect with our bodies, and reclaim our hormone health without shame.“I wish more women didn’t hate their periods,” she says.And after this episode — you just might feel the same.Instagram: holistic.hormones.pharmacistLinktreeSupport the showIf you like what you hear please click on "subscribe" or "follow" -  It's free and you will get notified when the newest episodes are posted!  Check us out on Instagram, X, and YouTube @mfupodcast. Give feedback, middle finger recommendations as well as random thoughts to [email protected]. Thank you for listening!In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.

In this deeply moving episode, we sit with Reshma — a mother of three, widow, and mindfulness coach — as she opens up about the unimaginable loss of her husband to suicide. Together, we explore what it means to stay present in the deepest pain, to mother through heartbreak, and to speak honestly about mental health in a world that often whispers when it should be listening.Reshma doesn’t offer tidy answers — instead, she offers her heart. She shares what it was like to feel unsurprised by her husband’s choice to leave this world, how important it was that “everyone waited” for her, and the truth she’s come to hold: “My kids just need my heart.”We talk about the cultural silence that often surrounds grief — especially in South Asian families — where “if the problem can’t be fixed with food, then we just don’t talk about it.” We reflect on the heavy question so many suicide loss survivors carry: “You have all the things. Why would you not want to be here?” And how, sometimes, the most radical thing we can do is “slow down, pay attention, and shut up.”As a mindfulness coach, Reshma also shares how ancestral practices of presence and stillness became her compass — not to escape pain, but to move with it. In a world where mindfulness has been reduced to buzzwords and apps, she brings it home to its roots — and reminds us it was never a trend, but a way of being.This episode honors Children’s Mental Health Month by asking what kids really need during loss, and why healing doesn’t follow a schedule — “grief has no timeline. It has no finish point.”Reshma reminds us it’s not about big leaps, but small steps. And that the most loving thing we can do — for ourselves and each other — is to check in. Period.Instagram: reshmakearneyWebsite: reshmakearney.comSupport the showIf you like what you hear please click on "subscribe" or "follow" -  It's free and you will get notified when the newest episodes are posted!  Check us out on Instagram, X, and YouTube @mfupodcast. Give feedback, middle finger recommendations as well as random thoughts to [email protected]. Thank you for listening!In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.

In this soulful and tender conversation, I sit down with Salima Saxton — relational dynamics coach, writer, performer, and co-host of the Women Are Mad podcast. Together, we unpack the quiet truths women carry — the roles we’ve played, the selves we’ve tucked away, and the longing to feel fully seen.Salima reflects on how often she was "very, very busy making it all right for everybody else," and how "a lot of life is not neatly packaged up." She invites us to consider a powerful question: "What if you were asked to write your own eulogy — what would it say?"This episode isn’t about fixing yourself — it’s about finding your way back. It’s about learning to leave the porch light on for your own return. Because as Salima says, "turning up as ourselves is really the superpower for all of us."It’s a conversation to sit with — a gentle invitation to reconnect with the parts of you that have been waiting to be welcomed home.Website:salimasaxton.comInstagram:salimajsaxtonSupport the showIf you like what you hear please click on "subscribe" or "follow" -  It's free and you will get notified when the newest episodes are posted!  Check us out on Instagram, X, and YouTube @mfupodcast. Give feedback, middle finger recommendations as well as random thoughts to [email protected]. Thank you for listening!In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.

This week on Middle Fingers Up, we’re holding space for a powerful voice during Ovarian Cancer Awareness Day — Alvina Nadeem, a South Asian woman, mother, wife, AI innovator, keynote speaker, and cancer survivor who reminds us that survival isn’t just about staying alive, but about reclaiming our voice.She shares the mantra she carried as an immigrant woman in a male-dominated field — “I’ll show them” — and how that grit both protected and pressured her. We talk about trusting your gut, naming what feels off, and advocating for your body when silence feels safer.“I needed to survive,” she says, “but I also didn’t want to make it hard for others.”We unpack the toll of quiet strength, what it means to choose presence over pride, and how to honor your instincts when the system tells you otherwise.This conversation isn’t just about one story — it’s a challenge to the systems and cultural silences that keep so many of us suffering quietly. From survival mode to self-defined healing, this episode affirms that we have the right to ask, to name, and to fight.Instagram: coachalvinaTikTok: OCWARRIORQUEENChai & Hope: South Asian Cancer CommunitySupport the showIf you like what you hear please click on "subscribe" or "follow" -  It's free and you will get notified when the newest episodes are posted!  Check us out on Instagram, X, and YouTube @mfupodcast. Give feedback, middle finger recommendations as well as random thoughts to [email protected]. Thank you for listening!In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.

Loss is more than death — it’s the quiet grief of losing a homeland, a friendship, a relationship, trust, emotional safety, or even parts of ourselves we didn’t know we had to say goodbye to.In this powerful conversation with Palak, a Grief and Loss Recovery Specialist, we explore how "grief is love" and how we can honor all types of loss. Palak reminds us that "no emotion is good or bad" and shares healing tools like guided journaling, helping us to unpack the weight of grief, especially when we don’t have words for it.We also discuss the power of "collective responsibility" in healing, emphasizing that grief doesn’t have to be an individual burden — it’s something we can share, honor, and heal together.As Palak says, "All losses are worthy of grief," and "there is no timeline to grief."Instagram: rare_mind_talksMindMakeoverServiceSupport the showIf you like what you hear please click on "subscribe" or "follow" -  It's free and you will get notified when the newest episodes are posted!  Check us out on Instagram, X, and YouTube @mfupodcast. Give feedback, middle finger recommendations as well as random thoughts to [email protected]. Thank you for listening!In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.

What happens when two Indian women—from different parts of the world—sit down to talk about parenting, patriarchy, and psychiatry? In this episode, I’m joined by Dr. Sidhana, a psychiatrist based in India, for a cross-continental conversation rooted in truth-telling, compassion, and curiosity.We reflect on what it means to be raised in systems where “the stricter the parent, the more rebellious the child,” and how “children notice the subtle signs” long before we think they do. We speak for the marginalized, question what we’ve normalized, and explore how" it’s time to break the generational curse."This episode is a call to change the narrative, treat our daughters and sons equally, and understand that a "true gentleman is actually empathetic."We explore the emotional worlds of young people—the silence, the self-blame, the identity crises that happen behind closed doors—and how adults can do better by simply learning to listen.We’re igniting one mind at a time—and this episode is an opportunity to reflect on how mental health is viewed and handled across continents, and how much work we still have to do.Let’s break the stigma. Together.Instagram: shrink_anindaBlog: draninda30.medium.comSupport the showIf you like what you hear please click on "subscribe" or "follow" -  It's free and you will get notified when the newest episodes are posted!  Check us out on Instagram, X, and YouTube @mfupodcast. Give feedback, middle finger recommendations as well as random thoughts to [email protected]. Thank you for listening!In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.

What happens when you finally find the words for what you've been carrying your whole life? "Suddenly, I had language for things that I'm experiencing." That’s the power of sitting down with someone like Tony Nabors, a racial equity educator and truth-teller who doesn’t just talk about systems—he helps us feel and understand them.In this raw and unfiltered episode, we talk about what it means to unlearn, to let go of people-pleasing, and to reclaim your power even when it hurts. We get into the heartbreaking reality that "sometimes the people we love truly don’t give a shit"—and what it takes to reclaim your power anyway.From confronting the myth of being “a good person” to unpacking how "niceness is a tool of white supremacy," Tony challenges us to "prioritize the intersect that makes people the most uncomfortable." This conversation is not about shame—it’s about transformation. It’s about asking: "What does new community look like?" "What do new friendships look like?"So if you’ve ever wondered whether you’re alone in this work, if you’ve ever wrestled with the loss that comes with growth, or if you’ve ever said to yourself, "I can change and transform and control what I do going forward"—this episode is for you."Can we cuss on this podcast?" Hell yes. Because this one’s about getting real.Jen Willsea Articlewww.racialequityinsights.comInstagram: racialequityinsightsSupport the showIf you like what you hear please click on "subscribe" or "follow" -  It's free and you will get notified when the newest episodes are posted!  Check us out on Instagram, X, and YouTube @mfupodcast. Give feedback, middle finger recommendations as well as random thoughts to [email protected]. Thank you for listening!In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.

In this unapologetically real conversation, I sit down with Mohini, a Holistic Relationship Coach for Ranis, who guides Desi divorcees to reclaim their power and rewrite their relationship stories. After a 14-year marriage, Mohini has come face-to-face with the complexities of cultural expectations, self-worth, and the fear of being alone. She’s now on a mission to help others find freedom and joy on their own terms.Mohini shares her deeply personal journey, reflecting on how her worth was once tied to her role as a wife, and how she was caged in cultural norms that kept her from fully embracing her true nature. “What is your true nature?” she asks, inviting us to explore what we’re hiding behind out of survival.We dig into powerful truths like, “There’s a lot of shit to be pissed off about,” and how it’s by design that women aren’t always in spaces where they can make real change. Mohini talks about how multiple truths can be true at one time and how part of nature is change—sometimes, it’s necessary for our own evolution.“Your life is not over just because you’re a divorced woman,” Mohini reminds us. She urges us to ask, Are you even happy doing that for your entire life? With raw honesty, she challenges us to let go of the fear of being alone, stop living on someone else’s frequency, and realize: You’re worthy of a life beyond suffering.Join us for a powerful conversation that’s about more than just divorce—it’s about shedding the expectations that hold us back and rediscovering the fire within. "At some point, you’re going to have to let go of how many fucks you give,” says Mohini. So, let’s go on a fucking journey together.Website:  ranirising.comInstagram: iammohinigimaSupport the showIf you like what you hear please click on "subscribe" or "follow" -  It's free and you will get notified when the newest episodes are posted!  Check us out on Instagram, X, and YouTube @mfupodcast. Give feedback, middle finger recommendations as well as random thoughts to [email protected]. Thank you for listening!In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.

What happens when we try to understand South Asian mental health through a Western lens? We end up feeling lost—told to cut ties instead of repair them, to heal alone instead of within community. But healing was never meant to be an individual pursuit.In this conversation with Astha, we start scratching the surface—getting curious about what it would take to truly decolonize mental health. How do we challenge the pressure of productivity in our culture while making space for our own healing? Where is the line between evolving and losing ourselves?Astha also shares how her semester abroad in Delhi shaped her understanding of mental health—what she learned, what surprised her, and how it continues to influence her career today.Together, we discuss:  - Why being person-first rather than treatment-first matters  - How we have privileges our ancestors didn’t—but also struggles they wouldn’t recognize  - The tension between growth and staying true to who you are  - The power of self-awareness: If you conquer your mind, you conquer the worldThis episode is about unlearning, reclaiming, and finding your path—because true change starts with understanding yourself.Instagram: theessenceofselfWebsite: theessenceofself.comSupport the showIf you like what you hear please click on "subscribe" or "follow" -  It's free and you will get notified when the newest episodes are posted!  Check us out on Instagram, X, and YouTube @mfupodcast. Give feedback, middle finger recommendations as well as random thoughts to [email protected]. Thank you for listening!In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.

Music Media Personality and Multimedia Creative, LaToya Elle, joins us to share her journey of blending storytelling with a passion for amplifying Canadian artists. We dive into the artists on her radar, the challenges of being a Black woman in the industry, and the future of music media. LaToya opens up about the power of representation, the stories that matter most, and why true support goes beyond the spotlight. Plus, she puts her "Middle Fingers Up" to something we all need to hear. This is a conversation about purpose, passion, and making space for voices that deserve to be heard.Instagram: latoya_elle  linktr.ee/latoya_elleLatoya Elle's Podcast Behind The Music:  https://open.spotify.com/show/6s778pKRM9jAM4kqFmsRAO?si=PXSnEfupTL69YIChxRIylQSupport the showIf you like what you hear please click on "subscribe" or "follow" -  It's free and you will get notified when the newest episodes are posted!  Check us out on Instagram, X, and YouTube @mfupodcast. Give feedback, middle finger recommendations as well as random thoughts to [email protected]. Thank you for listening!In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.

What happens when we’re taught that curiosity about sexuality is shameful? And how do colonial histories still shape the way we talk—or don’t talk—about sex today? In this compelling episode, we sit down with Carine Abou Dahab, a sexologist passionate about breaking the silence and unlearning the shame surrounding sexuality.Together, we explore the lasting effects of sexual imperialism and colonization, uncovering how cultures across the globe once embraced sexuality before colonial powers imposed shame and control. Carine breaks down the six dimensions of sexuality, offering a holistic view of how our identities are shaped by biology, psychology, and culture.We get into real, urgent questions—How do we create safe spaces for our children to understand their bodies? What does healthy attachment look like? And how do we navigate teenage sexuality in a world where access to porn is easier than ever?As two brown women, we also bond over the "isms" we’ve been unlocking—how racism, sexism, and colonialism have deeply impacted the way our communities talk about (or avoid) sexuality. Through these personal reflections, we discuss the unlearning process and why it’s essential to reconnect with the truths we always knew deep down.Through it all, Carine’s wisdom shines: “The consequence of silence is being vulnerable to violence.”  This episode is for anyone ready to unlearn outdated narratives, reclaim curiosity, and cultivate authentic, open conversations—because understanding sexuality isn’t just about knowledge; it’s about safety, identity, and healing.If you’re "thirsty to learn" and ready to challenge what you thought you knew—this conversation is for you.Instgram: pro.nuancesSupport the showIf you like what you hear please click on "subscribe" or "follow" -  It's free and you will get notified when the newest episodes are posted!  Check us out on Instagram, X, and YouTube @mfupodcast. Give feedback, middle finger recommendations as well as random thoughts to [email protected]. Thank you for listening!In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.

Moving to a new country comes with challenges—feeling isolated, questioning if you're good enough, and pushing through rejection. But for Palak, every challenge became an opportunity. From starting a job as a newcomer to building a thriving art studio, her journey is a testament to resilience, stepping outside comfort zones, and trusting the process.In this episode, Palak shares how she connected with Indian society and women after moving, why she never thought she’d be an artist, and how taking things one day at a time has helped her grow. Her story is for anyone who has ever doubted themselves—because if she can do it, so can you.While the journey hasn’t been easy, Palak is deeply grateful for the opportunities she has found in Canada. In a world that often makes it harder for people of color to be seen and valued, she proves that passion and persistence can carve out space where creativity thrives. This episode is about embracing the unknown, defying expectations, and recognizing the power of community and self-beliefInstagram:palak.studioinkSupport the showIf you like what you hear please click on "subscribe" or "follow" -  It's free and you will get notified when the newest episodes are posted!  Check us out on Instagram, X, and YouTube @mfupodcast. Give feedback, middle finger recommendations as well as random thoughts to [email protected]. Thank you for listening!In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.

What does healing look like when the systems around us were never built for us? In this episode of Middle Fingers Up, we sit down with writer, mental health advocate, and early childhood educator Ishaa Vinod Chopra, author of Finding Order in Disorder: A Bipolar Memoir. Ishaa shares her journey with bipolar disorder, the stigma surrounding mental health in South Asian communities, and how working with young children has shaped her understanding of emotional well-being from an early age.We also discuss domestic violence in our community—how to recognize the signs, the cultural barriers that keep women trapped, and what real support looks like. And beyond Western mental health models, Ishaa reminds us that healing has always been woven into our roots—through movement, dance, storytelling, and creative expression.A powerful conversation about reclaiming our traditions, breaking cycles of silence, and finding strength in our own ways of healing.Instagram: findingorderindisorderforeverLinktree: linktr.ee/ishaavchopraSupport the showIf you like what you hear please click on "subscribe" or "follow" -  It's free and you will get notified when the newest episodes are posted!  Check us out on Instagram, X, and YouTube @mfupodcast. Give feedback, middle finger recommendations as well as random thoughts to [email protected]. Thank you for listening!In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.

In this brief Gup Shup, we talk about the challenges of taking care of your health while managing a small team or working solo. We'll discuss the guilt that comes with taking a sick day, especially as a child of immigrants who feel the weight of their parents' sacrifices. It's crucial to prioritize your well-being, how to manage the guilt of not working or completing tasks when you're unwell not compromising your long term health for short term gain. Join us for an honest and no-makeup rough-cut Gup Shup about making your health a priority.Support the showIf you like what you hear please click on "subscribe" or "follow" -  It's free and you will get notified when the newest episodes are posted!  Check us out on Instagram, X, and YouTube @mfupodcast. Give feedback, middle finger recommendations as well as random thoughts to [email protected]. Thank you for listening!In the spirit of reconciliation, we acknowledge that we live, work and play on the traditional territories of the Blackfoot Confederacy (Siksika, Kainai, Piikani), the Tsuut’ina, the Îyâxe Nakoda Nations, the Métis Nation (Region 3), and all people who make their homes in the Treaty 7 region of Southern Alberta.