NCR: National Corporate Radio News

Holy crap, we're back! After more than a year and a half away from the microphones, National Corporate Radio returns to bring you the first Republican Debate of 2016. Thrill to the insane ramblings of Ben Carson, the angry invective of Chris Christie, Carly Fiorina's delirious dead baby dreams, Jeb Bush's pathetic foundering around, Donald Trump's raunchy love for his daughter -- and so much more! It's actually not that different from the real Republican debates, but it's us, so it's better. This program was recorded live at the House of Honky Bean on Sunday, January 9, 2016. Apologies for the audio quality -- this recording engineer's a little rusty. This one's dedicated to David Bowie, the Starman, waiting in the sky.

Well, folks ... time to do Something Else with my life. NCR, as we know it, is over. If you really want to know why, listen to this episode, and you will understand. I REALLY, REALLY want to thank all my great collaborators over the years for making this so much fun, and most of all, thank YOU for tuning us in! There may still be the occasional NCR program posted here from time to time, but it ceases to be a weekly show, effective immediately. You haven't heard the last from me, not by any stretch. But next time, it'll be ... well, Somethin' Else. Fare thee well.

This week spiraled out of control! So, sorry, once again, no new show. Here's a bumper for something to look forward to.

In this episode, Borrin speaks with NSA whistleblower Edward Snowden about the secret programs he's revealed that sweep up millions of our phone calls, emails and pictures of cats. Does it matter that the government knows all this stuff about us? What should we care, if our cats didn't do anything wrong? Isn't privacy just soooo 20th Century? Mr. Snowden shares his quaint notions about our rights and the Constitution. This program was recorded live at the House of Honky Bean on Tuesday, June 11, 2013 at about 7 in the pm PST. But if you work for the NSA, you already knew that.

In this episode, Borrin commemorates Memorial Day a day late with Arizona Senator John McCain. Fresh off his secret mission to Syria, Senator McCain honors our troops -- and even our electronic troops -- by traveling the globe, looking for new places for them to fight. And also by calling George Washington a pussy. This program was recorded live at the House of Honky Bean on Tuesday, May 28, 2013 at a time in the pm PST.

In this episode, a slighter right-er Borrin Onley resumes "What's The Point?" with guest Rush Limphog to take a swing at the ripe Obama scandal pinatas. But their merriment is cut short by a detail from Obama's Journalistic Custody Services, who take Rush away and impose upon Borrin a "Very Special Moving America Forward Special!" Deputy Attorney General James Cole, Bill Clinton and President Barack Obama himself all team up to out-lawyer Borrin until he's subjected to the power of "Let's Stay Together." This program was recorded live at the House of Honky Bean on Tuesday, May 21, 2013 at 7 pm in the PST.

What started as another bland, cozy installment of "What's The Point?" literally got invaded for A Very Special Security State Christmas Special! Guests (hosts?) Donald "Fuckface Von Clownstick" Trump, Rush "Hot Tub" Limphog and Dick "Cthulhu" Cheney use host Borrin Onley like the tool he is until he finally cries "FREEDOM! AMERICA!" with help from Darryl Worley's "Have You Forgotten?" Well have you, punk?! HAVE YOU?!?!? This program was recorded live at the House of Honky Bean on Tuesday, May 14, 2013.

In this episode, Borrin chats up fresh-out-of-the-closet NBA center Jason Collins. As the first openly gay male athlete in any major American sports league, Borrin takes this opportunity to ask Jason just about every inappropriate question that could be asked of the man. It is humiliating, but really more for Borrin, who is probably not a very bright man after all. This program was recorded live at the House of Honky Bean, this afternoon, why not.

In this special Earth Day edition of "What's The Point?" Borrin chats up professional award winner and climate lover Al Gore, as well as Oklahoma Senator and climate change hoax revealer Jim Inhofe. Together the two of them produce enough hot air to guarantee global warming in our time. This program was recorded live at the House of Honky Bean on Tuesday, April 23, 2013 at a time in pm PST.

In this episode, Borrin wonders what Republicans are going to do to woo the non-white, rich, old male vote next time around. Joining Borrin to sort out this conundrum are two Republicans who are wholly incapable of fixing the problem: former Republican presidential candidate and Plastic American Mitticus "Mitt" Romney; and host of NCR's own "Sporty Guns" Russell Smithenennenenenen. This program was recorded live at the House of Honky Bean on Monday, April 1, 2013 in the pm PST.

In this episode, Borrin chats China with Chinese ambassador to the United States, Zhang Yesui. What are the prospects for Chinese democracy? Also, what are the prospects for the Guns N Roses' album, "Chinese Democracy" to be sold in China? You'll learn that and why the guy in this photo can't breathe so good, and also why we are all doomed. This program was recorded live at the House of Honky Bean on Tuesday, March 12, 2013 at a time in pm PST.

NCR host Borrin Onley chats it up post-State of The Union style with Big Bad former President Bill Clinton, and arguably even larger New Jersey Governor Chris Christie. It's a wide-ranging discussion that's sure to make you hungry. Stake your claim! This program was recorded live at The House of Honky Bean on Tuesday, February 12, 2013 in the pm PST.

In this episode, Borrin takes a look at the potential for immigration reform to finally take place in these United States. Are the politics right for it now? Is this what Americans really want? Joining Borrin to lift the dialogue deep into the gutter are two opposing guests: Dermott Meniscus, of the unfortunately titled National Alliance for Zero Immigration (or NAZI for short, but totally different NAZIs, that's for sure); and Patrick McPhee, an illegal immigrant to this country from a scary place called Ireland, where apparently people smoke petrol crack. This program was recorded live at the House of Honky Bean on Tuesday, February 5, 2013 at a time in the PM PST.

In this NCR exclusive, Borrin Onley nabs the President's first interview of his second term. Fall in love with Barack all over again as he lulls you into a false sense of complacency with his soothing Islamo-communo-fascist dictator words. Cringe as it sinks in that even though his bold rhetoric fulfills the darkest (and I do mean darkest) paranoid fantasies of his right wing opponents, his actions will demonstrate the utter emptiness of his soaring oratory. In other words: enjoy! This program was recorded live at the House of Honky Bean and in Space™ on Tuesday, January 22, 2013 in the pm PST.

Hooray, we survived 2012! This episode will help you to understand why 2012 will be remembered not as The End of The World, but the start of Gangnam Style (which is another way of saying, The End of The World.) Attend to highlights from the year with big newsmakers like President Obama, Mittens "Mitt" Romney, Rick Santorum, Pat Robertson, Todd Akin, Bill Clinton, Leon Panetta, Paul Ryan, Nancy Pelosi, John McCain and that Other Cain of the Train, Herman Cain. And so much more! Happy 2013 to you all!

This week, Borrin broaches the delicate subject of what to do in the wake of the massacre last week at a school in Newtown, Connecticut. Joining Borrin to do the broaching with his signature sensitivity and compassion is conservative bloviator and apparently, gun lover, Rush Limphog. Together, they come up with answers satisfactory to absolutely no one. This program was recorded live at the House of Honky Bean on Tuesday, December 18, 2012 in the pm PST.

NCR News returns with fresh information for your hungry ears! This week, Borrin takes a look at potential Secretary of State nominee Susan Rice with a man who really doesn't like her, Arizona Senator John McCain. Why is John such a hateful old man? Is it because one of his "Three Amigos" is retiring? Or is that just what happens when you get old? Borrin gets to the bottom of it, journalist-style. This program was recorded live at The House of Honky Bean on Monday, December 2, 2012 in the pm PST.

In this episode, Borrin reviews the election results across the country with non-political non-expert professional weirdo, David Lynch. There may be a cat skull involved. It's pretty fun! This program was recorded live at the House of Honky Bean on Tuesday, November 13, 2012 in the pm PST.

Holy crap, it’s finally here! It’s Election Night 2012, and your friends at NCR are all over this. With a panel that includes everyone from the Governator to Big Bad Bill, victory AND concession speeches from BOTH Romney and Obama, and the strangest conclusion to this election the other news outlets DON’T want you to know, this is the THE definitive source for fake-ass election news tonight! Tune it in and get ready for 1000 years of peace! This program was recorded on Election Night, 2012 (mostly) at the House of Honky Bean.

In this NCR News Special Presentation, Barack "Hussein" Obama and Mitt "The Mittigator" Romney debate off for a final smackdown in the Gator Pit in Boca Raton, Florida. Will the President deliver a knockout blow to an opponent who's weak on foreign policy? Or will Mitt surprise Obama and add Michele as a second wife? And who's the surprise winner of this and all the debates? Tune in and find out! This program was recorded at the House of Honky Bean, mighty recently.

In this NCR Special Presentation, host Borrin Onley guides a panel discussion immediately following the second Presidential Debate. Who won? What happened? Why are women in binders? Joining Borrin to sort it all out is a diverse panel of guests: former President Bill Clinton; Herman "The Train" Cain; conservative bloviator Rush Limphog; liberal lily liver Robert Shrill; Secretary of State Hillary Clinton; and Donald "The Donald" Trump. A genuine high wire act! This program was recorded live at the House of Honky Bean on Tuesday, October 16, 2012 at 8 ish in the pm PST.

In this NCR News Special, host Lawrence O'Rabia moderates the NCR 2012 Vice Presidential Debate-Off! It's a raucous throwdown as Vice President "Sloppy" Joe Biden and Congressman Paul "Abs" Ryan duke it out over taxes, Big Bird, entitlements and receding hairlines, all while the moderator gets more drunk. Fight! This program was recorded live at the House of Honky Bean on Monday, October 8, 2012.