The Shell and Sam Show

No outline. No filter. Just real life.This week we’re yapping about the chaos of being a wife, mom, and holding it all together while everything feels like it’s falling apart.If you’ve ever hidden in your car for peace or reheated your coffee 5 times… welcome. You’re our people

Behind every badge is a family carrying the weight of the job and sometimes the hero everyone else depends on is the one who needs saving.In this powerful and deeply honest episode of The Shell & Sam Show: Wives Behind the Badge, Shell and Sam sit down with retired firefighter paramedic Matty Fiorenza and his wife Liz to talk about the reality many first responder families face but few talk about openly.After 22 years serving with the Anaheim Fire Department, Matty found himself battling severe PTSD, depression, anxiety, and alcoholism. What began as trying to cope with the trauma of the job slowly turned into a fight for his life. After reaching a devastating breaking point and surviving a suicide attempt, Matty began a recovery journey that would not only change his life but also the life of his family.Together, Matty and Liz share their story from both sides of the badge.Matty opens up about the mental toll of the job, the culture that often discourages asking for help, and the moment he realized something had to change. Liz shares what it was like watching the man she loved struggle with battles she couldn’t see, the impact it had on their marriage, and the strength it took to keep fighting for their family.This conversation dives into the darkest moments but more importantly, the hope that came after.Matty now dedicates his life to helping other first responders find healing through resources like trauma retreats, EMDR therapy, meditation, support groups, and other innovative treatments designed specifically for those who serve on the front lines.This episode is raw, emotional, and incredibly important for first responders and the spouses who love them.Because sometimes the strongest thing a hero can do… is ask for help.If you or someone you love is struggling, please know you are not alone and healing is possible.🎧 Listen now and share this episode with someone who needs to hear it.Because behind every badge is a family… and every family deserves support. 🚨🤍

Episode 8: When the Home Team Needs Support Too
Special Guest: Erika AndersonIn this powerful episode, we sit down with Erika Anderson — fire wife, trauma survivor, certified life coach, and Program Director of the 3FTL Home Team. Erika is a fierce advocate for first responder partners and the creator of a safe, supportive community she lovingly calls her “Homies,” where spouses and significant others can find connection, healing, and understanding.We talk a lot about the trauma first responders carry…
but what about the one sleeping next to them?Erika shares her deeply personal journey as a fire wife and the moment she realized that partners of first responders are often carrying invisible weight of their own. From emotional hyper-vigilance and isolation to secondary trauma and the quiet pressure of holding everything together, this conversation gets real about what life can look like behind the scenes.Together, we dive into: • The invisible emotional load first responder partners carry • What secondary trauma actually looks like in real life • The impact mental health struggles can have on marriages and relationships • Why support for both partners is essential for a relationship to survive • How the 3FTL Home Team is creating a space where partners can finally exhaleErika also shares practical tools for partners who feel overwhelmed, including ways to regulate your nervous system, healthy boundaries, and small steps you can take today to start reclaiming your peace.If you’ve ever felt like the “strong one” who isn’t allowed to fall apart… this episode is for you.Because the truth is:
The relationship survives when both people have support.Pull up a seat. You’re not alone here. 🤍Connect with Erika & the 3FTL Home Team: https://www.3ftl.comWant to share your story with us?
We’d love to hear it.
DM us on Instagram or TikTok, or email us at [email protected]

In this episode of The Shell & Sam Show, we sit down with Amy, a Licensed Clinical Social Worker with 29 years of experience at the Department of Veterans Affairs and a Veterans Crisis Line responder, and her husband Bill, a retired sheriff’s deputy and Marine Corps veteran. Together, they share their journey through PTSD, recovery, faith, and how they launched My Lt Leo to support first responder families. We talk about trauma, marriage under pressure, breaking stigma, and what healing actually looks like when the job comes home with you.Lt. Leo Website: https://myltleo.com/Bills Email for Faith and Route: [email protected]

In this episode, we talk about the reality of loving someone whose life runs on adrenaline—and how chronic stress, emotional exhaustion, and constant fear can slowly reshape a marriage. We open up about the loneliness that can exist even when you’re not alone, the communication breakdowns that happen in survival mode, and the emotional distance that builds when both partners are running on empty.We also share personal moments from our own marriages—the hard conversations, the breaking points, and the truth about how easy it is to lose connection when your nervous system lives in constant stress. Most importantly, we talk about what helped us find our way back: honesty, vulnerability, and choosing each other even when it was hard.If you’ve ever felt invisible, disconnected, or like you’re carrying the emotional weight of this life alone, this episode is for you. You’re not broken—you’re under pressure. And you’re not alone.

This episode is one many families are living… but don’t always have words for.PTSI doesn’t just affect the responder. It enters the marriage. The home. The kids. The badge doesn’t clock out when they walk through the front door and neither does the weight of what they carry.In this deeply important conversation, we’re talking about mental health without shame. Trauma is an injury — not a weakness. We’re joined by Mike Walkley, who served over 30 years in the fire service and now leads Next Level Wellness Support, helping first responders seek healing before coping turns into crisis.We dive into:What PTSI really looks like at home (and why it’s often missed) Walking on eggshells and living in “alert mode” When spouses become the emotional regulators of the houseHow alcohol and substances quietly become survival toolsThe ripple effect on marriages and childrenHow to encourage help without pushing your spouse awayProtecting your own mental health as a partnerThis episode isn’t about blame. It’s about understanding. It’s about recognizing the signs earlier. It’s about reminding families that help exists before everything falls apart.“The kids may not understand what’s happening but they feel everything.”If you or your spouse are struggling, please know you are not alone. There are programs, people, and support systems ready to walk with you.✨ Share this episode with someone who needs it.✨ Reach out if this conversation resonates with your story.✨ Follow and support Next Level Wellness Support to learn more about first responder recovery resources.Because help earlier saves.And while the badge may not clock out… neither does love. 💛— Shell & SamBehind Every Badge, Real Wives Share Unseen Struggles and Strength.@next_level_wellness_support@shieldingthefrontlinekernco

Parenting doesn’t pause when they’re on duty—and neither do we. In this episode of Shell Shocked & Sam Spilled, we talk about the invisible labor of first responder families: solo parenting, carrying the mental and emotional load, answering hard questions from our kids, and loving this life while feeling exhausted by it. This isn’t a complaint—it’s honesty. If you’ve ever held it all together while they were on shift, this episode is for you. You are not alone.First Responders Children's Foundation link:https://1strcf.org/Disclaimer:Shell Shocked & Sam Spilled is a podcast created for conversation, connection, and community. The content shared is based on the personal experiences and perspectives of the hosts and guests and is intended for educational and entertainment purposes only.This podcast does not provide medical, mental health, or professional advice and should not be considered a substitute for therapy, diagnosis, or treatment. Listening to this podcast does not create a professional or therapeutic relationship between the hosts and listeners.The views expressed do not represent all first responders, spouses, departments, or agencies. Guest opinions are their own and do not necessarily reflect the views of the hosts or the podcast.Some episodes may include discussions of sensitive topics, including PTSI, trauma, substance use, marriage stress, and emotional challenges. Listener discretion is advised.

Behind every badge is a family — and behind that family is a wife carrying more than most people will ever see.In this episode of Shell Shocked & Sam Spilled: The Wives Behind the Badge, we open up about the quiet truths first responder wives often keep buried.The thoughts we feel guilty for having.The resentment, loneliness, anger, and fear we try to hide.The weight of loving someone whose job never truly clocks out.This episode dives into the shell shocked side of this life — the emotional whiplash, the constant state of alert, the way your nervous system never fully rests — even when they walk through the door.And sam spills the truths we’re rarely allowed to say out loud.We talk about feeling invisible to the world, loving someone who belongs to the job first, and why honesty about your struggles doesn’t mean disloyalty — it means survival.This isn’t about complaining.It’s about connection.Because you can be proud of your first responder…and still struggle with the life that comes with them.If you’ve ever loved a first responder and thought, “Why does this feel so heavy?” — this episode is for you. You’re not weak.🔥 You’re not ungrateful.🖤 You’re shell shocked — and you’re not aloneDisclaimer:Shell Shocked & Sam Spilled is a podcast created for conversation, connection, and community. The content shared is based on the personal experiences and perspectives of the hosts and guests and is intended for educational and entertainment purposes only.This podcast does not provide medical, mental health, or professional advice and should not be considered a substitute for therapy, diagnosis, or treatment. Listening to this podcast does not create a professional or therapeutic relationship between the hosts and listeners.The views expressed do not represent all first responders, spouses, departments, or agencies. Guest opinions are their own and do not necessarily reflect the views of the hosts or the podcast.Some episodes may include discussions of sensitive topics, including PTSI, trauma, substance use, marriage stress, and emotional challenges. Listener discretion is advised.

When the boots come through the door, the job often comes with them.This podcast is a raw and honest look at life as a first responder’s wife—navigating emotional distance, trauma, love, and resilience. We share the truths that are hard to say out loud, creating space for understanding, connection, and healing.And before you go, don’t forget — we’ll be doing our Sam Spilled / Shell Sips segment, where we keep it real, raw, and probably a little unfiltered. If you want to be part of a future episode, share your story with us to enter into our shell shocked sips coffee giveaway.You can DM us on Instagram or TikTok or email us at [email protected]. 

Welcome to the very first episode of The Shell and Sam Show. This episode is raw, unfiltered, and honest, so we ask for a little grace as we navigate our first time behind the mic.We are the wives behind the badge, sharing the realities of life alongside first responders—the highs, the challenges, and everything in between. This podcast was created with one simple hope: that at least one first responder spouse listening feels seen, heard, and reminded that they are not alone.If you’ve ever felt unheard, misunderstood, or isolated in this journey, this space is for you. Thank you for being here at the beginning with us.Head over to our Instagram or TikTok to enter our giveaway. To email us your story : [email protected]