This May Get RAW: Building Wise Resilience

Imagine you live in a house with no doors. People can walk in whenever they choose, and your time, your space, your energy is never your own.  For many domestic abuse survivors, that’s what life in active abuse felt like: no boundaries standing between us and the danger. Learning how to set and hold healthy boundaries post-abuse is one of the most important, and hardest, lessons survivors need to learn. In this episode, we’ll dive into what a boundaried life can look like and how survivors can come to embrace boundaries as an act of love.We’ll talk about:How abusers manipulate our boundaries to make us feel like we don’t deserve to have themWhy boundaries aren’t selfishRed flags to help you identify when your boundaries are being violatedTips to help survivors decide what their own healthy boundaries areHow allies and advocates can support survivors in setting and maintaining healthy boundariesJoin us for some real talk about the hard work of establishing boundaries—and why that work is worth every second.Content Warning: This May Get RAW contains explicit language and candid discussions of trauma, domestic violence, and mental health — including the emotions and feelings that come with these lived experiences. We are speaking as survivors, not as mental health professionals. Please engage with care and at your own pace.If you need support, contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233 (call or text) or visit thehotline.org.Lisa Croke Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠@Helvickcoaching⁠⁠Sara JudithLinkedIn: ⁠⁠⁠Sara Judith ⁠⁠⁠Daniel HenriquezInstagram: ⁠⁠⁠@Adravamedia⁠

Content Warning: This May Get RAW contains explicitlanguage and candid discussions of trauma, domestic violence, and mental health — including the emotions and feelings that come with these lived experiences.We are speaking as survivors, not as mental health professionals. Please engage with care and at your own pace.If you need support, contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233 (call or text) or visit thehotline.org.Fear is an important evolutionary trait, one that can help us and keep us safe. But for survivors of domestic abuse, fear doesn't just show up in moments of danger; it becomes woven into the fabric of daily life, shaping decisions, relationships, and even our sense of self-worth.Those fear stories—the old tapes playing in our minds—can keep us from living a whole, healthy, thriving life.In this episode, we talk about how survivors can start to move beyond the old fears holding us back. We’ll dive into:The ways fear manifests for survivors, both emotionally and physicallyHow to tell the difference between valid fear and old tapes Tips to help survivors build resilience so fear no longer controls their lifeHow allies and advocates can support survivors as they navigate their fearIf you’re ready to see what life can be like when fear isn’t running the show, this is the episode for you.ResourcesShani Persson, breathworkpractitioner and host of the Learning from Trees podcast. Lisa Croke Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠@Helvickcoaching⁠⁠ Sara JudithLinkedIn: ⁠⁠⁠Sara Judith ⁠⁠⁠ Daniel HenriquezInstagram: ⁠⁠⁠@Adravamedia⁠

Leaving an abusive relationship doesn’t just bring relief; it can also bring deep grief and losses both big and small. In this episode, we’ll be shining a light on this often misunderstood part of the domestic abuse survivor experience and share our own stories of the complex, layered feelings of grief survivors often face. We’ll dive into:·   The various losses domestic abuse survivors may find themselves  grieving·   What the classic Five Stages of Grief can look like for survivors ·   How survivors can both be grateful for their freedom and honor their grief over what was lost·   How allies and advocates can validate and support survivors’ grieving processJoin us for a moving conversation about holding space for what was lost and allowing ourselves to grieve what we’re grieving. Lisa Croke Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠@Helvickcoaching⁠⁠Sara JudithLinkedIn: ⁠⁠⁠Sara Judith ⁠⁠⁠Daniel HenriquezInstagram: ⁠⁠⁠@Adravamedia⁠

Words matter, especially when it comes to talking about survivors of intimate partner violence and domestic abuse. In this episode, we get real about the nuances of language, how survivors can reclaim their voices and their narratives, and how to talk about domestic violence, emotional abuse, and narcissistic relationships in ways that protect and uplift survivors instead of causing further trauma.  We’ll talk about:·   How abusers weaponize language·   How survivors can flip the script of abuse and develop healthy self-talk·   Why “why don’t they just leave?” is the wrong question·   Tips for allies and advocates about using survivor-affirming languageJoin us for an inside look into how words shape survivors’ lived experiences and how survivors, allies and advocates, and society can all learn to ask better questions and choose words that inspire resilience and healing.  Lisa Croke Instagram: ⁠⁠@Helvickcoaching⁠Sara JudithLinkedIn: ⁠⁠Sara Judith ⁠⁠Daniel HenriquezInstagram: ⁠⁠@Adravamedia⁠

Shame: It’s primitive, powerful, and universal. In this episode, we delve into what shame is, how domestic abuse survivors experience shame, and how we can move past our shame with resilience, awareness, and wisdom. We’ll talk about:·   The difference between guilt and shame·   Common sources of shame for domestic abuse survivors·   How to recognize and name our shame and its triggers·   The transformative power of speaking our shame and reclaiming our narrativeJoin us for a candid conversation about one of the most challenging aspects of life as a domestic abuse survivor and for inspiration to release your shame and step fully into your healing.Show Notes: If you or someone you know may be experiencing abuse, confidential help is available. The National Domestic Violence Hotline offers free, 24/7 support at 1-800-799-SAFE or by texting START to *88788.Resources mentioned in episodeBrown, Brené. Atlas of the Heart: Mapping Meaningful Connection and the Language of Human Experience. Random House, 2021.Brown, Brené. Shame vs. Guilt. BreneBrown.com, January 14, 2013. Available at https://brenebrown.com/articles/2013/01/15/shame-v-guilt/.Neff, K. D. Self-compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself. William Morrow Paperbacks, 2015.Lisa Croke Instagram: ⁠@HelvickcoachingSara JudithLinkedIn: ⁠Sara Judith ⁠Daniel HenriquezInstagram: ⁠@Adravamedia⁠

We’re Lisa and Sara: friends, entrepreneurs, and domestic abuse survivors. We know what it's like to rebuild your life after domestic violence, emotional abuse, narcissistic relationships, and trauma. Walk with us as we explore the joys and challenges of life after domestic abuse. In this introductory episode, you’ll get a taste of who we are and what you can expect from the series, including:Real, unpolished, no-BS conversations about the realities of life after traumaStories and perspectives based on our lived experiences as domestic abuse survivors in active recoveryInvitations into actionable practices, for survivors themselves and for allies, advocates, and loved ones, to support healing from domestic abuse  And yes, some cursing and dark humor!Step into our ongoing conversation about the journey of building lasting resilience and moving from domestic abuse survivor to thriver.Resources mentioned in episode:If you or someone you know may be experiencing abuse, confidential help is available. The National Domestic Violence Hotline offers free, 24/7 support at 1-800-799-SAFE or by texting START to *88788.Most domestic violence shelters and rape crisis centers can help connect you with free or low-cost counseling options, either with a certified counselor or a trained domestic violence advocates. They may also offer support groups for survivors facing anxiety, depression or other post-traumatic symptoms. Lisa Croke Instagram: @helvickcoaching Sara JudithLinkedIn: Sara Judith Daniel HenriquezInstagram: @Adravamedia