Truth Meets Taboo

You say you want pleasure. More connection. More intimacy. More ease in your body.But when it actually shows up… something tightens. You pull back. You overthink. You start bracing.This isn’t a mindset issue. It’s a safety issue.In this conversation, we get into what it really means to receive pleasure and why so many people struggle to stay in it. From nervous system responses to the stories we carry about intimacy, this episode breaks down why feeling good can feel unfamiliar, overwhelming, or even unsafe.We talk about the “should” patterns that pull you out of the moment, the fear that shows up when connection deepens, and the reality that pleasure is something your body has to learn how to hold.This is about noticing your patterns without shaming them and starting to build capacity for something you actually want.If you’ve ever felt like you can’t fully relax into love, intimacy, or even simple moments of joy… this one’s for you.Listen all the way through. Then take one thing from this episode and actually practice it in your real life. That’s where this work starts to land.Themes Explored in This Episode Why pleasure can feel unsafe even when you want it. Nervous system regulation and its role in intimacy  The connection between emotional safety and physical sensation  “Should” thinking and how it disrupts presence  Pleasure as a skill, not just a feeling  Fear of intimacy and pulling away from connectionKey TakeawaysWanting pleasure is not enough. Your body has to feel safe to receive it. Shame does not go away by force. It shifts through awareness and understanding. Your nervous system determines how long you can stay in pleasure. Overthinking and “should” patterns pull you out of the experience. Emotions are signals. Ignoring them disconnects you from your body. Intimacy can trigger fear, even when it’s something you want.Jump to the Part That Calls You0:00 Intro6:23 The Problem with “Should” Thinking and Losing Presence11:03 Reactivity, Overstimulation, and Pulling Away22:05 Belief Systems and Internal Narratives36:23 Being Disruptive and Advocating for YourselfConnect with Sara:IG: https://www.instagram.com/confidentpelvicrehabWebsite: http://www.confidentpelvicrehab.comConnect with me:InstagramdesiretheforbiddenjustasuccugirlTiktokdesiretheforbidden | pleasure professor 🍒 sageWebsitehttps://www.desiretheforbidden.com/

Welcome back to Truth Meets Taboo and to another episode of DTF Better with Sage and Sara, the series where we explore how to become more connected, more expressed, and more turned on by life itself.In this conversation, Sara and I continue unpacking pleasure, but not in the way you’ve been taught to think about it. This isn’t about performance, perfection, or peak experiences. It’s about the small, intentional ways you build a life that actually feels good.We introduce the idea of “planting pleasure seeds"; tiny, everyday practices that expand your capacity for joy, creativity, and self-expression over time. Because pleasure isn’t something you stumble into. It’s something you cultivate.We move through everything from self-expression in your space, to creativity, to relationships, to the way you’ve been conditioned to prioritize others over yourself. And I share more about my own process of learning how to choose what I actually want—without filtering it through anyone else.This is not just about seggs. It’s about becoming someone who is deeply available; for pleasure, for truth, and for life.This episode is an invitation to slow down, get present, and start building a relationship with yourself that actually feels good. Themes Explored in This Episode Pleasure as something you cultivate, not chase  “Planting pleasure seeds” and building capacity over time  Why pleasure is often externalized instead of self-led  The difference between performing pleasure vs. experiencing it  Self-expression through space, creativity, and environment  How your environment reflects your internal world  Relearning joy through small, intentional practices  The role of curiosity in accessing pleasure Jump to the Part That Calls You0:00 Intro7:34 Planting Pleasure Seeds in Our Lives16:49 The Importance of Self-Pleasure and Self-Care27:31 Embracing Self-Governance and Intimacy Skills36:04 Exploring Personal Desires and Whimsy46:40 The Importance of Presence in Experiencing Life1:01:35 The Vulnerability of Sharing Personal Experiences1:14:34 Seeking Community in Non-Monogamous SpacesConnect with Sara:IG: https://www.instagram.com/confidentpelvicrehabWebsite:http://www.confidentpelvicrehab.comConnect with me:InstagramdesiretheforbiddenjustasuccugirlTiktokdesiretheforbidden | pleasure professor 🍒 sageWebsitehttps://www.desiretheforbidden.com/

I’m officially opening the first-ever Truth Meets Taboo series—a six-month conversation (two episodes per month) on pelvic floor physical therapy, sexual wellness, and healing painful sex without treating pain as the point of sex.For this series, I’m joined by my co-host Dr. Sara Sohn, a pelvic floor physical therapist, sex counselor, mentor, and professional belly-letting-outer. Sara helps people stop leaking, stop hurting, have better sex, and feel at home in bodies that have changed after weight loss, surgery, or big life shifts—and she talks about bodies and sex the way real people actually live in them.In this first episode, we talk about moving from pain-centered sex to pleasure-centered sex, pelvic health and pleasure, nervous system regulation, sexual counseling, kink and intimacy, intentional abstinence, watering the rose garden metaphor, choosing 2026 mantras, and staying authentic while identity and desire evolve.This series is where truth meets taboo—and where pleasure finally gets a seat at the table.🌹 In This Episode We Explore:The difference between moving away from pain vs. moving toward pleasureWhy our nervous systems often cling to sufferingHow shame shapes our relationship to seggs, bodies, and worthinessThe connection between pelvic floor pain and emotional safetySelf-abandonment, resentment, and boundary collapseBurlesque as body reclamationAbstinence as self-authority and erotic agencyRitual vs routine: cultivating pleasure intentionallyRewriting body narratives after weight loss or surgeryLiving “many lives in one lifetime”Listen & ConnectFollow the podcast for new episodes in this six-month Truth Meets Taboo seriesShare this episode with someone navigating pleasure, pelvic health, and identity shiftsConnect with Sara:IG: https://www.instagram.com/confidentpelvicrehabWebsite:http://www.confidentpelvicrehab.comConnect with me:InstagramdesiretheforbiddenjustasuccugirlTiktokdesiretheforbidden | pleasure professor 🍒 sageWebsitehttps://www.desiretheforbidden.com/

After a year of grief, endings, and major life shifts, this episode opens a new chapter for the podcast.In this episode, I share why I began a vow of intentional abstinence as an act of self-authority rather than restriction.After everything that unfolded last year, I realized I needed to slow down, put clear boundaries around my body, and rebuild trust with my own discernment. Growing up in a highly structured military household taught me how to obey, but not how to choose for myself. Over time, that loss of agency showed up in my relationships, my boundaries, and my relationship with sex.Now 21 days into my abstinence journey, I reflect on reclaiming autonomy, ending cycles of self-betrayal, and coming back into relationship with my body from a place of choice.This episode marks a shift — into deeper self-authority, clearer boundaries, and a more intentional relationship with desire, agency, and self-trust.This conversation is for anyone navigating self-authority, sexual boundaries, and learning how to trust themselves again.Themes Explored in This Episode Choosing abstinence as a path to self-authority  Growing up with structure vs. developing personal discernment  How obedience disconnects you from your own decision-making  Losing and reclaiming agency over your body  The relationship between boundaries and self-trust  Sex as validation, coping, and emotional avoidance  Why removing a pattern creates space for awareness  Building new nervous system responses through abstinence  Self-governance and learning to make aligned decisions Key Takeaways Abstinence can be a tool for self-awareness—not restriction  You can lose connection to your own authority through over-structure  Boundaries rebuild trust with yourself over time  Sex can become tied to worthiness and validation without awareness  Removing a pattern reveals what’s underneath it  Discipline creates self-trust and confidence  You don’t need to give your body to receive love Reflection Questions Where in my life am I outsourcing my decisions?  Can I hold a boundary with myself consistently?  What would it look like to fully trust my own choices? Closing NoteSelf-authority isn’t about control.It’s about trust.And sometimes the strongest thing you can dois choose yourselfeven when everything in you wants to reach outside.Jump to the Part That Calls You0:00 Intro4:51 The Journey of Abstinence: Reclaiming Self-Authority11:30 Breaking the Link Between Sex and Validation18:11 Why a Boundary Comes Before Discernment25:09 When Intimacy Became ArmorConnect with me:InstagramdesiretheforbiddenjustasuccugirlTiktokdesiretheforbidden | pleasure professor 🍒 sageWebsitehttps://www.desiretheforbidden.com/

This episode is about the truth I kept dancing around.I talk about how hiding became second nature for me. How silence felt safer than honesty. How telling the truth was something my nervous system learned to associate with danger, conflict, and loss.As I reflect on this year, I share what grief, breakups, and major life transitions have taught me about authenticity. About emotional honesty. About the cost of not being real with myself.I explore how trauma shapes our relationship with truth, why environments need to feel safe for honesty to exist, and what it looks like to build relationships that can actually hold the truth without punishment.If you’ve ever felt afraid to name what you really want, this episode is for you.Themes Explored in This Episode How childhood shapes your relationship with truth and honesty  Why people learn to hide instead of express  The connection between truth, safety, and nervous system response  Lying as a protection mechanism rooted in trauma  How hiding from others leads to hiding from yourself  The “web of lies” and how patterns build over time  Truth as a pathway to authenticity and self-awareness  Why truth disrupts and creates change  Letting go of identities that no longer align  Fear of abandonment, over-giving, and emotional patterns Key Takeaways Your relationship with truth is shaped early in life  Hiding becomes a learned strategy for safety  Avoiding truth creates disconnection from yourself  One lie often creates multiple layers of avoidance  Truth is disruptive—but necessary for growth  Being honest requires a safe and regulated environment  The only way out of avoidance is through it Reflection Questions What truths have I been avoiding about myself?  When did I learn that telling the truth wasn’t safe? Truth doesn’t just reveal who you are. It changes what you’re willing to accept.And the more honest you are with yourself, the harder it becomes to stay in what no longer fits.Jump to the Part That Calls You0:00 Intro6:09 Childhood Influences on Truth and Honesty12:26 The Role of Environment in Truth-Telling18:25 The Evolution of Identity and Truth27:25 The “Web of Lies” PatternConnect with me:InstagramdesiretheforbiddenjustasuccugirlTiktokdesiretheforbidden | pleasure professor 🍒 sageWebsitehttps://www.desiretheforbidden.com/

This episode is the sound of my pleasure breathing through my grief. I’ve been having the kind of energetic seggs that makes my chest open, my legs shake, and my past dissolve. The kind of intimacy where a securely attached man looks me in the eyes and says, “Interrupt me. Tell me what you feel. I want you in real time.”And the moment he does, my nervous system softens.My grief loosens.My whole body remembers I’m still alive.I talk about seggs as spiritual energy exchange, the raw heat of being met in my insecurity, the way his voice in my ear helps me regulate, breathe, and surrender. I talk about being Dickmatized in the most conscious, intentional, divine way — where the pleasure isn’t a distraction from the pain, but the portal that moves me through it.If you crave episodes on grief and pleasure, secure attachment co-regulation, self-discovery through seggs, and the ritual of letting someone inside your energy field… press play.Themes Explored in This Episode Sex and intimacy as energy transference between people  Pleasure as a tool for healing, regulation, and emotional processing  Moving through grief while experiencing pleasure and joy  The importance of attunement to your own body and desires  How curiosity builds safety and deeper connection  Setting boundaries around who has access to your body  Sexual liberation as choice—not unlimited access  Being intentional and selective with your energy  Using pleasure (with self or others) to regulate the nervous system Key Takeaways Sex is not just physical—it is an energetic exchange  Pleasure can be a powerful tool for healing and transformation  Healing does not always have to come through suffering  Who you share intimacy with impacts your emotional and energetic state  Secure attachment creates safer and more connected intimacy  Lack of self-attunement leads to miscommunication and dysregulation  Sexual liberation is about choice, not availability Reflection Questions How do I feel after being intimate with someone—energized or drained?  Am I intentional about who I share my body with? Pleasure isn’t a distraction from your healing. It can be part of it.What you allow into your bodyhas the power to move you—so choose it consciously.Jump to the Part That Calls You0:00 Intro4:46 The Power of Pleasure and Intimacy16:25 The Role of Communication in Intimate Relationships23:31 Setting Boundaries and Choosing Partners WiselyConnect with me:InstagramdesiretheforbiddenjustasuccugirlTiktokdesiretheforbidden | pleasure professor 🍒 sageWebsitehttps://www.desiretheforbidden.com/

Intimacy is more than mechanics or performance. It is the sacred art of being fully present with ourselves and with each other. It is laughter and play, tenderness and courage, the softening of shame, and the opening into pleasure.What I witnessed in this workshop felt like pure magic. Partners leaning into one another until the whole room exhaled. Blindfolded explorations where trust unfolded. A pleasure circle where joy and desire moved like electricity through community.This is the intimacy education we should have received. A space where connection feels playful, healing is shared, and the body is honored as sacred. A place where we learn to ask, to listen, to touch with reverence, and to allow ourselves to be witnessed in truth.May these reflections stir something within you. May they remind you that your body is worthy, your desire is holy, and your intimacy is yours to reclaim.Themes Explored in This Episode What an intimacy workshop actually is (beyond traditional s*x ed)  The role of community in healing and transformation  Why connection and shared experience deepen self-awareness  The structure of a workshop: arrival, intention-setting, and grounding  Using play and lightness to open up intimacy  Somatic work and why the body must be included in healing  Shame, conditioning, and emotional patterns around the body  Healing relationships with genitals and s*xual expression  The difference between knowing how something works vs. knowing how to feel it  Why healing in community can be more powerful than healing alone Key Takeaways Intimacy is a skill that can be learned and practiced  Traditional s*x ed often lacks emotional and relational depth  Being in community creates validation, connection, and expansion  The body must be included in any real healing process Reflection Questions What comes up for me when I think about being seen in intimacy?  Do I feel safe exploring my body and my desires? Intimacy isn’t something you “just know.” It’s something you learn, practice, and grow into.And sometimes, the shift you’re looking for happens when you stop doing it alone.Jump to the Part That Calls You0:00 Intro1:44 What An Intimacy Workshop Actually Is7:26 Creating Safe Spaces for Connection12:30 Exploring Somatic Healing and Intimacy19:02 Grounding and Reflection in Intimacy23:29 Embracing Vulnerability and GrowthConnect with me:InstagramdesiretheforbiddenjustasuccugirlTiktokdesiretheforbidden | pleasure professor 🍒 sageWebsitehttps://www.desiretheforbidden.com/

The sacred slut archetype has been one of the most liberating discoveries on my journey. For years, I carried shame around my sexuality, shaped by purity culture and the stories women are told about desire. Reclaiming the word slut has allowed me to heal, to prioritize my pleasure, and to step into unapologetic self-acceptance.This episode is an invitation to see your sexuality as sacred, to release the shame, and to embody your own erotic wholeness without apology.Themes Explored in This Episode The cultural meaning and history of the word “sl*t”  How the term shifted from neutral to a tool of sexual shame  The role of religion, purity culture, and colonialism in policing desire  Why women are shamed for the same behaviors men are praised for  The “sl*t” as a feminine archetype tied to pleasure and liberation  The shadow side of desire: shame, secrecy, and suppression  How repression of erotic energy shows up in everyday life  The connection between desire, identity, and self-expression  Reclaiming the “sl*t” as a sacred and empowered identity Key Takeaways The word “sl*t” has historically been used to control, not describe  Shame around desire is culturally constructed and reinforced  Suppressing desire leads to secrecy, disconnection, and internal conflict  Your erotic desires are not separate from your identity—they are part of it  Reclaiming pleasure is an act of personal and cultural liberation  Desire is not dangerous—it is a source of truth and direction  The “sl*t” archetype represents freedom, not shame Reflection Questions What does the word “sl*t” bring up for me?  Where have I been taught to feel shame around desire?  What parts of my desire have I been suppressing? Your desire isn’t something to hide. It’s something to listen to.The parts of you you were taught to suppress might be the very parts meant to set you free.Jump to the Part That Calls You0:00 Introduction and Personal Updates7:21 Cultural Context of the Word 'Sl*t'12:10 The Slut as a Feminine Archetype16:28 The Sacred Slut and Liberation21:15 Exploring the Sacred Slut through Lilith30:31 Practices for Embracing the Sacred SlutConnect with me:InstagramdesiretheforbiddenjustasuccugirlTiktokdesiretheforbidden | pleasure professor 🍒 sageWebsitehttps://www.desiretheforbidden.com/

Touch is where we first learn we are safe, loved, and alive.In this episode, I open up a conversation about the kind of touch that goes beyond the surface. The touch that calms your nervous system, that says you belong here, that reminds you of your humanity.We explore why so many of us are starved for it, how cultural conditioning has made touch feel unsafe or performative, and what happens to our bodies and hearts when connection is missing.I share how touch can heal not just in intimacy but in the simple, intentional moments we offer ourselves and others. This is about reclaiming touch as your birthright, understanding your boundaries, and letting yourself receive what you have always needed.Themes Explored in This Episode Touch as the first sense and the body’s original language  Why touch is foundational for safety, connection, and regulation  The biological impact of touch (cortisol, dopamine, serotonin, immune health)  Touch as a form of co-regulation in the nervous system  The effects of touch deprivation on mental and physical health  Cultural differences in touch and Western touch aversion  How masculinity and gender norms restrict physical affection  The impact of race, identity, and social conditioning on touch  How childhood experiences shape your relationship with touch  Touch as a transaction vs. a safe, mutual experience Key Takeaways Touch is a primary form of communication and regulation  Your body is biologically wired to need touch  Lack of touch contributes to both emotional and physical dysregulation  Touch is not weakness—it is a core part of wellbeing  Cultural and social conditioning shape how safe touch feels  Trauma can rewire the body to reject or fear touch  Safe, repeated experiences can rebuild trust with touch Reflection Questions How does my body react when I am touched? Do I crave touch but resist it at the same time?  What would safe, supportive touch look like for me? Touch isn’t extra. It’s foundational.The more you allow yourself to experience it safely,the more your body remembers what connection feels like.Jump to the Part That Calls You0:00 Intro4:09 Touch as your first language7:45 The science: how touch regulates your body12:58 Cultural conditioning around touch20:02 Childhood experiences and touch trauma26:30 Touch starvation + lonelinessConnect with me:InstagramdesiretheforbiddenjustasuccugirlTiktokdesiretheforbidden | pleasure professor 🍒 sageWebsitehttps://www.desiretheforbidden.com/

Receiving sounds simple, but for so many of us, it’s one of the hardest things to actually do.In this episode, I’m diving into what makes receiving feel so unsafe — how our nervous system, old wounds, and social conditioning teach us to block love, compliments, abundance, and guidance even when we’re desperate for them.I’m sharing the real difference between taking and truly receiving — how surrender, boundaries, and trust open us up to more pleasure, more connection, and more freedom.You’ll hear personal stories, honest truths, and practical ways you can start softening resistance, expanding your capacity to receive, and reclaiming your worthiness.Themes Explored in This Episode Receiving as an energetic opening, not just taking  The different forms of receiving: emotional, energetic, sensual, and spiritual  Why receiving requires capacity, not effort  How self-worth and “not enoughness” block receiving  The link between receiving and control vs. vulnerability  Why receiving can feel unsafe in the nervous system  How trauma and past experiences shape your ability to receive  Somatic signs that you are rejecting what you want  The difference between performative pleasure and real surrender Key Takeaways Receiving is about openness, not effort or earning  You can only receive what your nervous system feels safe to hold  Resistance to receiving is often rooted in protection, not incapability  Being the giver can be a way to maintain control and avoid vulnerability  Boundaries make receiving safer, not harder  Receiving without regulation can feel overwhelming or threatening  Performative pleasure disconnects you from real experience Reflection Questions What do I feel when I receive something without earning it?  Where in my life do I deflect or minimize what I’m given? Receiving isn’t passive. It’s a choice your body has to feel safe making.The more you build capacity for it, the more you expand what you can hold.Jump to the Part That Calls You 0:00 Intro12:22 Barriers to Receiving22:11 The Somatic Experience of Receiving36:52 Regulating the Nervous System for Receptivity48:05 Receiving as a Liberatory PracticeConnect with me:InstagramdesiretheforbiddenjustasuccugirlTiktokdesiretheforbidden | pleasure professor 🍒 sageWebsitehttps://www.desiretheforbidden.com/

I used to think desire was something to be feared or managed—especially as a woman raised to be desired, not to desire. In this episode, I unpack how I began to tell the difference between what I truly want and what I was taught to want. From cultural conditioning to gendered expectations to the psychology of desire, this conversation is an invitation to explore the raw truth beneath our wants. Because desire isn’t just a feeling, it’s a force.Themes Explored in This Episode Desire as both a feeling (noun) and an action (verb)  Why desire + emotion determines action or inaction  The difference between true desire and conditioned desire  How marketing, media, and culture influence what you want  The role of discernment in identifying aligned desires  Why desire is labeled as “dangerous” and how that creates repression  How avoiding desire actually makes it more destructive  The connection between desire, control, and systems of oppression  The tension between logic vs. emotion in decision-making  How people socialized as women are conditioned to be desired, not to desire  Performing desirability vs. expressing authentic desireKey TakeawaysDesire is not indulgence. It is directional information.Suppressing desire does not eliminate it. It distorts it.Many women are socialized to be desired, not to desire. That conditioning shapes how we relate to power and agency.Cultural narratives influence what we think we want, often before we consciously choose it.There is a difference between authentic desire and inherited desire. Learning to distinguish them is critical.Desire is closely tied to power. Reclaiming it requires examining where you were taught to shrink.When desire feels unsafe, it often reflects conditioning — not truth.Reconnecting with desire restores agency, alignment, and self-trust.Desire can function as a compass when you are willing to listen without moralizing it.Reflection Questions Do I actually feel safe wanting what I want?  Is this desire mine—or something I was taught to want?  How do I feel about the things I desire?  Where am I avoiding desire instead of exploring it?  Am I performing desirability, or expressing what I truly want?Desire isn’t something to control.It’s something to understand.The more clearly you can hear it,the more honestly you can live.Jump to the Part That Calls You 0:00 Intro6:00 Desire: A Life Force12:00 Cultural Narratives Around Desire20:07 Desire and Gender Dynamics28:58 Desire and Power Dynamics40:25 Desire As CompassConnect with me:InstagramdesiretheforbiddenjustasuccugirlTiktokdesiretheforbidden | pleasure professor 🍒 sageWebsitehttps://www.desiretheforbidden.com/

For most of my life, pleasure felt like something I had to earn—or apologize for. But claiming pleasure has become a radical part of my healing. In this episode of Truth Meets Taboo, I explore how I went from body disconnection to embracing my sexual desires as sacred.We talk about community support for relationships, the role of sexuality education, and how prioritizing pleasure has changed my relationship with myself. This is more than a personal journey—it’s a form of protest, a reclaiming of everything I was told to suppress.Themes Explored in This EpisodeThe first moment shame enters the body—and how it shapes identity Why desire can feel unsafe, even when it’s natural The disconnect between cultural messaging and lived experience around sexuality  How trauma, coercion, and lack of consent awareness impact self-trust  Performing intimacy vs. actually being present in your body  The link between attention, validation, and self-abandonment  How community and education create safety for exploration Key Takeaways Shame around the body is often learned early and reinforced over time  Disconnection from the body makes it harder to recognize and communicate boundaries  Being desired is not the same as feeling safe or seen  Performing pleasure is often a response to fear, not desire  Healing requires safe environments where curiosity is allowed  Consent requires awareness, communication, and responsibility from all parties  Community and education are essential for navigating intimacy in a healthy way  Pleasure and safety are not opposites—they can coexist  Sexual liberation is about autonomy, not validation  Coming back to your body is a continuous process Reflection Questions When was the first time your body was met with shame instead of curiosity?  When did desire start to feel unsafe for you? This episode invites you to move gently with yourself.To question what you’ve been taught.And to begin noticing what your body has been trying to tell you all along.Jump to the Part That Calls You 0:00 Intro7:45 Exploring the Past and Shame17:38 The Journey of Sexual Liberation26:42 Healing Through Connection and Intimacy39:00 Finding Community and Kink45:27 Sexual Liberation as a Life-Saving ForceConnect with me:InstagramdesiretheforbiddenjustasuccugirlTiktokdesiretheforbidden | pleasure professor 🍒 sageWebsitehttps://www.desiretheforbidden.com/

No filters. No pretending.This is where truth collides with everything we were told not to say.Welcome to Truth Meets Taboo. Connect with me:InstagramdesiretheforbiddenjustasuccugirlTiktokdesiretheforbidden | pleasure professor 🍒 sageWebsitehttps://www.desiretheforbidden.com/