Trying for FI

**Activity guide sheet in our Resource Doc!**This week, we’re bringing a new lens to the podcast: financial therapy. Rascal puts on their therapist hat to help us explore hidden emotional relationships to money — especially in partnerships.Using a framework called Internal Family Systems (or “parts work”), we explore how different aspects of ourselves show up during financial decisions — from fear and shame to protection and power. These “parts” influence how we budget, spend, save, and show up in our financial relationships.We talk about: • Why money decisions in couples can feel so personal — and what’s actually going on underneath • How to identify your own “money parts” and recognize your partner’s (without blame or shame) • A simple practice to begin noticing and naming your emotional patterns around money • How this work supports your FIRE journey — especially during moments like reaching Coast FI or hitting big setbacksWhether you’re in a relationship or not, this episode will help you reflect more deeply on what money means to you — stability, freedom, care, obligation, control, connection — and how those meanings may shift over time.This is not financial advice. It is emotional insight that can help you build deeper intimacy, greater self-awareness, and more clarity on your path toward financial independence.Teaser: We also hint at a future episode on using EMDR for money beliefs and FI-related emotional blocks.#financialtherapy #moneyandemotions #internalfamilysystems #moneyintimacy #firewithkids #coastfi #financialindependence #emotionalwealth #moneyanxiety #financialintimacy #partswork #moneyhealing #fiemotionsSend a textCheck out our Resource Doc: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1_j7CHmbRZsZgWC-SWLIQcunmJdpkEDUsdfhWA1FW04s/edit?usp=sharing And our IG account @tryingforfi

In this episode, we reflect on four major financial “calamities” that hit our family between 2022 and now — and how those moments shaped our growth, resilience, and intimacy as financial partners.While none of these events left us without food or housing, they were significant outflows relative to what we were earning and saving — emotional, destabilizing, and deeply instructive.We share stories and insights from: • 2022: The birth of our youngest, with zero paid leave and unequal income • 2023: Purchasing a second home and the financial power dynamics it exposed • 2024: Major water damage and temporary relocation (“our house broke,” said the toddler) • 2025: An expensive legal process — and the emotional cost of drawing down our emergency fundThrough each “blip,” we explore: • The evolution of our financial intimacy and shared decision-making • How we transitioned from separate money to a one-pot model • What it’s like to max out your credit cards and still believe in your plan • Why emergency funds are non-negotiable (even when you hate tapping them) • The inner work Rascal did to manage money anxiety, and how Fetch gained financial voiceThis isn’t a step-by-step guide. It’s a real-time, real-life glimpse into what wealth-building looks like when life throws curveballs—and why we still believe in financial independence as a path to deeper connection, even when the journey gets messy.Send a textCheck out our Resource Doc: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1_j7CHmbRZsZgWC-SWLIQcunmJdpkEDUsdfhWA1FW04s/edit?usp=sharing And our IG account @tryingforfi

What would your life look like if you hit Coast FI tomorrow? In this light, personal episode, we let ourselves dream a little—and reflect on how our day-to-day lives might shift if we no longer had to save for the future.We revisit the definition of Coast FI: that moment when your retirement savings are set, and future contributions aren’t necessary. You still work to cover today’s expenses, but now you can choose to earn less, work fewer hours, or be more intentional with your time.We explore: • How Coast FI would reshape our family rhythms and weekday routines • Why things like cabbage slaw, early preschool pickups, and field trips matter so much • How we’d invest more time into food, fitness, relationships, nature, and rest • The tension between dreaming of FIRE and recognizing the joys that Coast FI could bring much soonerThis isn’t about luxury travel or early retirement—it’s about presence, connection, and savoring the ordinary joys that often get squeezed out by second jobs and side hustles.If you’ve ever wondered what all this money work is for, this episode will help you reconnect with the quiet, meaningful parts of life that Coast FI can open up.#coastfi #financialindependence #firewithkids #financialfreedom #whatisweath #slowliving #familywealth #parentingandmoney #lateFIstarters #financialmindset #dailyjoys #coastfilifeSend a textCheck out our Resource Doc: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1_j7CHmbRZsZgWC-SWLIQcunmJdpkEDUsdfhWA1FW04s/edit?usp=sharing And our IG account @tryingforfi

In this episode, we pick up where we left off on our Coast FI path—and dive into the real-life, real-time process of choosing 403(b) (or 401(k)) funds that match our values, fees, and family cash flow.We talk about: • Why we decided to prioritize Fetch’s 403(b) over Rascal’s SEP (for now) • How we used ChatGPT to analyze 47 different fund options from scratch • What we learned about expense ratios, ESG investing, and Fidelity vs. non-Fidelity funds • Why our paycheck flow is temporarily upside down — and how that’s reshaping our money habits • The psychological challenge of shifting control, roles, and comfort zones around who’s “managing” whatThis is a deep and practical episode for anyone who:Wants to DIY their 403(b) or 401(k) investmentsIs navigating self-employment + W2 income trade-offsIs learning to balance values-based investing with expense ratio realitiesIs late to FIRE but trying to build systems that work for your real lifePlus: we tease an upcoming episode that will question whether ESG funds are truly aligned — or just shiny distractions with high fees. Stay tuned.#403b #401k #firemovement #coastfi #esginvesting #expensetratio #diyinvesting #chatgptandmoney #retirementsavings #valuesbasedinvesting #financialindependence #familyfinances #financialdecisionsSend a textCheck out our Resource Doc: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1_j7CHmbRZsZgWC-SWLIQcunmJdpkEDUsdfhWA1FW04s/edit?usp=sharing And our IG account @tryingforfi

In this episode, part of our What Is Wealth? series, we explore a game-changing concept in the FIRE world: Coast FI — and how discovering it completely shifted our financial goals.Coast FI is the idea that if you save enough early, you can stop contributing to retirement accounts and still retire comfortably. It’s not about leaving the workforce — it’s about gaining freedom, flexibility, and more time with your family now, not just decades from now.We talk about: • What Coast FI really means (and no, it’s not living by the beach) • Why this milestone fits our family’s season of life better than full FIRE • How the Coast FI Calculator from The Fioneers gave us a timeline of 1–5 years 😳 • The powerful impact of age, return rate, and savings pace on your Coast FI number • How our retirement strategy has evolved — and why Fetch finally started a 403(b)If you’re in your 30s or 40s, have kids at home, and feel like full FIRE is too far away, this episode will open up a more achievable and meaningful path. Coast FI might give you the freedom to work less, enjoy more, and stay present without sacrificing your future.🔗 Try the calculator here: thefioneers.com/coast-fi-calculatorSend a textCheck out our Resource Doc: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1_j7CHmbRZsZgWC-SWLIQcunmJdpkEDUsdfhWA1FW04s/edit?usp=sharing And our IG account @tryingforfi

After two years at Fetch’s job, we finally decided to invest in the 403(b). In this episode, we walk you through why we waited, what changed, and how we’re making the decision now — with a little help from ChatGPT.You’ll hear: • How our FIRE journey shifted our perspective on tax-advantaged accounts • Why we passed on the 403(b) at first (and what we misunderstood back then) • What helped us rethink the “Middle Class Trap” and early access fears • How we used ChatGPT to analyze Fidelity fund options and match them to our existing portfolio • The real trade-offs between SEP and 403(b), especially around flexibility and paycheck deductionsWe also reflect on how far we’ve come — from confusion about tax filing status to confidently talking portfolio allocations and contribution maxes.Whether you’re navigating multiple retirement accounts, thinking about Coast FI, or just figuring out where to stash your next investment dollar, this episode gives you a grounded, real-life look at how we’re making it all work.Send a textCheck out our Resource Doc: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1_j7CHmbRZsZgWC-SWLIQcunmJdpkEDUsdfhWA1FW04s/edit?usp=sharing And our IG account @tryingforfi

Is it possible to take a meaningful family vacation without blowing your FIRE goals? In this episode, we share how we spent a week in La Paz, Mexico as a family of five — for under $5,000 — and how the trip deepened our evolving definition of wealth.We cover: • How we planned and budgeted (including credit card hacks and DIY adventure gear) • What we prioritized to increase time wealth and ease • Sticky money moments — when we said “no” to overpriced fried food and “yes” to rubber ducky chaos • What we wouldn't change (like getting ice cream every day 🍦) • Why we believe travel can be part of our wealth goals rather than derail themFor us, this wasn’t just a vacation. It was a way to live our values — choosing connection, simplicity, and joyful memories now, not just in some future retirement.We also share a few stories that surprised us, what helped the kids reflect on value, and how we enjoyed the experience again all together after landing back at home.If you’ve been wondering whether travel, family and FIRE can coexist, this episode will inspire you to reconsider how you define wealth, and how to craft a trip that nourishes your family now.#firewithkids #familybudgettravel #redefiningwealth #financialindependence #firemovement #budgetfriendlytravel #meaningfulvacation #parentingandmoney #timewealth #latestartersfiSend a textCheck out our Resource Doc: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1_j7CHmbRZsZgWC-SWLIQcunmJdpkEDUsdfhWA1FW04s/edit?usp=sharing And our IG account @tryingforfi

This episode, Rascal went on a financial date — but not with Fetch. With AI. 😏In this playful and surprisingly insightful episode, we explore what happened when one of us fed our real-life budget tracker to ChatGPT and asked it to analyze our finances.You’ll hear: • Why we decided to test AI as a financial thought partner • What budget "secrets" Rascal spilled to the robot • How AI did with spending cuts (spoiler: don’t touch our ice cream 🍦) • How helpful it was for retirement forecasting, savings goals, and ETF research • Where AI miscalculated — and why human oversight still mattersWe also talk about the real-world emotional experience of using AI in a deeply personal way — especially as elder millennials who remember a pre-internet childhood.If you’ve ever wondered whether a robot can help you FIRE faster, want a laugh, or are just curious about how tech could support your money mindset, this episode is for you.Bonus mentions: Rascal shares other AI tools out there (like CLEO and YNAB) and whether they'd go on a second financial date with AI again. Fetch is only slightly jealous.#AIandmoney #budgetingwithAI #financialindependence #chatgptbudgeting #techandfinance #firemovement #personalfinancepodcast #eldermillennialmoney #AIadvisor Send a textCheck out our Resource Doc: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1_j7CHmbRZsZgWC-SWLIQcunmJdpkEDUsdfhWA1FW04s/edit?usp=sharing And our IG account @tryingforfi

What is wealth — really? Is it just a number, or something you can practice right now?In this episode, we explore how our definition of wealth is expanding to mean more than our Financial Independence #goals. We talk about moving beyond the spreadsheet into the present moment, where wealth includes time, health, joy, connection, and purpose, now — not just money in the bank for later.You’ll hear: • Why many in the FIRE community struggle to enjoy spending — even after “making it” • How our money tracking habits unintentionally reinforced a scarcity mindset • Real-life stories of how asking the question "what is wealth" changed our choices — from airport salads to bereavement therapy • Book and podcast recs that inspired our mindset shift (including Staci Haines, Elizabeth Husserl, Sahil Bloom, and Jordan Grumet)  This episode isn’t about abandoning financial goals. It’s about not deferring joy until some theoretical finish line. If you’ve ever felt torn between saving and savoring, this conversation is for you.Bonus: we also tease an upcoming tool we’re developing to help track joy, satisfaction and time.#whatisweath #financialmindset #firemovement #financialindependencewithkids #enoughness #presentwealth #mindfulmoney #moneyandmeaning #wealthbeyondmoney #lateFIstarterSend a textCheck out our Resource Doc: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1_j7CHmbRZsZgWC-SWLIQcunmJdpkEDUsdfhWA1FW04s/edit?usp=sharing And our IG account @tryingforfi

This is a quick update to one of our favorite parenting-money mashups: the video game investing rule we introduced in a previous episode.Here’s the deal: when our kids want to spend their own money on video games or in-game purchases, they now also invest 50% of that amount into their custodial account — saving toward a future goal like buying a car.In this update, we share: • How the rule is actually landing with our kids (surprisingly well!) • What we’ve noticed about their new spending behavior and decision-making • Why our kids now want index funds over Nintendo stock 😄 • How we used a snowball to explain compound interest in the wild • Why we as parents feel better about digital spending nowPlus, we now track their net worth — and yes, it’s already making an impression on them.The big takeaway? This isn’t just a clever rule. It’s turning into a way for our kids to build early investing habits, reflect on value, and even spark their own financial curiosity.#financialliteracy #kidinvesting #videogamespending #parentingandmoney #custodialaccounts #compoundinterest #firemovement #raisingmoneywise #gamifiedbudgeting #familyfinanceSend a textCheck out our Resource Doc: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1_j7CHmbRZsZgWC-SWLIQcunmJdpkEDUsdfhWA1FW04s/edit?usp=sharing And our IG account @tryingforfi

In this episode, we introduce one of our favorite new FIRE practices: the quarterly wealth talk — a simple but powerful way to reflect, plan, and feel more connected as budget partners.Here’s what we cover: • What a quarterly money talk actually is (and why we love it) • A sample agenda you can use to review your finances and reflect on what wealth really means • What surprised us during our own quarterly review — from underestimated savings to unexpected feelings of abundance • How this conversation helped us celebrate wins, plan ahead, and feel more like a team • Tips to prep better next time so your chat takes 45 mins, not 3 hours 😉This episode is a follow-up to our Spending Tracker episode — if you haven’t listened to that one yet, it’s a great place to start.Whether you're tracking your money daily or just starting out, this practice can help you: • Spot patterns in spending and saving • Connect emotionally with your goals • Redefine wealth beyond just numbersBonus: we include a free agenda template in the episode resources to guide your own quarterly conversation.#quarterlymoneytalk #financialintimacy #budgetingwithpartners #firemovement #wealthreflection #moneyandmindset #financialcheckin #spendingtracker #moneytalks #financialindependenceSend a textCheck out our Resource Doc: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1_j7CHmbRZsZgWC-SWLIQcunmJdpkEDUsdfhWA1FW04s/edit?usp=sharing And our IG account @tryingforfi

Ready for a serious nerd alert? Want your marriage / partnership to feel more like a financial team? In this episode, we break down our 3-month experiment using a shared daily budget tracker — and how it radically shifted not just our finances, but our relationship too. You may want to download the "Trying for Fi Budgeting Template" in our resources document and follow along!We talk about: How tracking our income and expenses daily improved our marriage The budgeting spreadsheet we adapted (inspired by Mindy Jensen from BiggerPockets Money) How we customized it to reflect real family life: self-employment, estimated taxes, kid expenses, Bay Area living, and even line items for coffee and ice cream 🍦What surprised us — like realizing we under-spend on date nights and always have at least one large unexpected expense You’ll also hear how this tool helped us: Make decisions as a teamUnderstand where our money goes (childcare and mortgage: 44%!)Track our savings rate and estimate our “FI number”Feel less alone on the financial journeyIf you want to feel more in charge of your finances, want to be on the same money page with your partner, or practice tracking expenses without overwhelm, this episode gives you real-life insight into how daily financial visibility can build intimacy and clarity.Plus, we share tips for actually sticking with it — especially if you’re neurodivergent, busy, or not naturally spreadsheet-inclined.#budgettracking #financialintimacy #firemovement #sharedfinances #couplesandmoney #networthtracking #dailybudget #financialindependencewithkids #moneyandmarriage #adhdfriendlybudgetingSend a textCheck out our Resource Doc: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1_j7CHmbRZsZgWC-SWLIQcunmJdpkEDUsdfhWA1FW04s/edit?usp=sharing And our IG account @tryingforfi

Ever thought about giving your kid a business loan? We did!On our journey to financial independence, we want our kids to build confidence and real-world money skills early. So when our daughter pitched a plan for a slime business to sell to classmates, we decided to back it — with a $40 private loan from the family’s own “Homegrown Lending Department.”In this episode, we cover: • How we set up a simple loan contract with clear terms • The social boundaries our kid navigated selling to peers • How she's learning to track income, costs, and profit • Why we believe kids' financial literacy is worth the mess and small risksIf you’re a parent dreaming of financially savvy kids — or just curious how to spark entrepreneurial thinking at home — this episode will make you smile and maybe inspire your own kitchen table startup.Send a textCheck out our Resource Doc: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1_j7CHmbRZsZgWC-SWLIQcunmJdpkEDUsdfhWA1FW04s/edit?usp=sharing And our IG account @tryingforfi

Are you a busy parent trying to save money without spending hours researching hacks? Same here. In this quick episode, we share 5 simple, budget-friendly tips that help us cut costs in everyday life — from using Amazon and Google smarter, to scoring secondhand finds on Craigslist, to easy DIY swaps.Bonus: these money-saving tips are also better for the environment, making them wins for your wallet and the planet.Whether you're juggling kids, work, or just need a few practical frugal tips that actually fit into real life, this one's for you.#frugalliving #moneysavingtips #budgethacks #ecofriendlyliving #firemovement #financialindependence #familybudgetingSend a textCheck out our Resource Doc: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1_j7CHmbRZsZgWC-SWLIQcunmJdpkEDUsdfhWA1FW04s/edit?usp=sharing And our IG account @tryingforfi

Thinking about investing in a duplex or multifamily home? Wondering how to split utilities fairly between tenants (or future you)?In this episode, we share the story of how our well-meaning, flat-rate utility plan went sideways — and what we wish we’d known before setting it up. If you're a first-time landlord, house hacker, or just curious about the nitty-gritty of shared utilities, this one’s for you.Laugh with us (or at us), and walk away with clear takeaways for setting expectations, communicating with tenants, and protecting your own sanity and bottom line.#multifamilyinvesting #duplexliving #househacking #landlordlife #realestatefail #utilitysplit #rentalpropertytips #financialindependenceSend a textCheck out our Resource Doc: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1_j7CHmbRZsZgWC-SWLIQcunmJdpkEDUsdfhWA1FW04s/edit?usp=sharing And our IG account @tryingforfi

Got some extra cash after filling your emergency fund and maxing out retirement accounts? Wondering whether to put it into real estate or the stock market?In this episode, we break down one of the biggest FIRE questions: Where should your surplus money go if you want to reach financial independence faster?We walk through our thought process, compare all-in stock vs. real estate approaches, and talk honestly about what fits our current capacity and cash flow. If you're navigating similar questions about investing for the future, this one’s for you.Whether you're team stocks, team real estate, or somewhere in between—tune in and consider what’s right for your own journey.#financialindependence #investingstrategy #extracash #realestatevsstocks #firemovement #stockmarketinvesting #realestateinvesting #fiwithkidsSend a textCheck out our Resource Doc: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1_j7CHmbRZsZgWC-SWLIQcunmJdpkEDUsdfhWA1FW04s/edit?usp=sharing And our IG account @tryingforfi

Curious about investing but not sure where to begin? In this episode, we walk through exactly how we got started — from figuring out what an index fund even is, to choosing a platform, to understanding how fees can eat away at returns.We break down: • Index funds vs. ETFs • Where we invest (and why) • How much is too much to pay in fees • How we made our first real investments — togetherIf you're a beginner, late starter, or just tired of feeling intimidated by investing, this episode will give you a grounded, real-life take on starting your investment journey with confidence.#investingforbeginners #financialindependence #indexfunds #etfs #lowfeeinvesting #firemovement #startinvesting #fiwithkidsSend a textCheck out our Resource Doc: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1_j7CHmbRZsZgWC-SWLIQcunmJdpkEDUsdfhWA1FW04s/edit?usp=sharing And our IG account @tryingforfi

If your kids (or you!) are spending money on video games or in-game purchases, this episode is for you. As FIRE-minded parents, we’re always looking for ways to talk about money in ways our kids actually care about.In this episode, we share a new family rule we created to link video game spending to real-life savings goals (like buying a car someday) — and how it’s helping us build budgeting habits, financial literacy, and deeper money conversations with our kids.Even if video games aren’t your thing, this parent hack works for other “fun spending” categories too — from movies to sports to apps.You’ll hear how we approach allowance, savings matching, value-based spending, and how FIRE principles show up in parenting... even when screen time is involved.#financialliteracy #teachingkidsaboutmoney #familybudgeting #firemovement #videogamespending #moneyhabits #parentinghack #raisingfinanciallysmartkidsSend a textCheck out our Resource Doc: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1_j7CHmbRZsZgWC-SWLIQcunmJdpkEDUsdfhWA1FW04s/edit?usp=sharing And our IG account @tryingforfi

Talking about money in a relationship can be... a lot. In this episode, we take you through the story of how we learned to talk about money as a couple — from awkward first convos and conflicting money beliefs, to building shared strategies that support our life together.Along the way, we tackle big themes like: • Fairness vs equality in finances • Keeping track without keeping score • Separate accounts vs shared money • Bridging differences in financial education and life philosophyWhether you're newly partnered or decades in, this episode offers real talk (and a few laughs) for anyone trying to build financial intimacy and teamwork in their relationship.#moneyandrelationships #financialpartnership #talkingaboutmoney #couplesfinances #sharedbudgeting #financialindependence #moneytalks #firemovementSend a textCheck out our Resource Doc: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1_j7CHmbRZsZgWC-SWLIQcunmJdpkEDUsdfhWA1FW04s/edit?usp=sharing And our IG account @tryingforfi

Are you interested in Financial Independence but feel like you’re starting a little late? Wondering if it’s still possible to retire early—or just work less—while raising a family in a high-cost area?We’re a queer couple in the Bay Area with three kids, chasing FIRE (Financial Independence, Retire Early) on a moderate income. In this intro episode, we share why we started this podcast, what “Trying for FI” means to us, and what you can expect from upcoming episodes.Whether you're in your late 30s, 40s, or 50s, and just now exploring FIRE, you're not alone—and you're not too late. We’re here to share tips, missteps, reflections, and relatable stories from the messy middle.Welcome to the journey. Let’s try for FI—together.#financialindependence #lateFIstarters #firemovement #financialindependencewithkids #fiwithfamily #firepodcast #startFIRElate #tryingforfiSend a textCheck out our Resource Doc: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1_j7CHmbRZsZgWC-SWLIQcunmJdpkEDUsdfhWA1FW04s/edit?usp=sharing And our IG account @tryingforfi