CALM Kid Convo w/Tammy Williams: Navigating Life with a Mentally Ill Parent

Thank you for bringing your beautiful ears right here for episode 13 of CALM Conversations about Learning where we lean in to re-envision our children’s education with and for the folks who matter most: teachers, parents and of course, our young folks!This CALM Kid Convo is with 19-year old Tammy Williams, who is a college student and the budding business owner of Shay Melanin, a skincare product line for Black girls. Check her out at on the Instagram @Shay.melanin.Tammy also happens to be the daughter of a mentally ill parent who spent much of her childhood displaced and because I share a similar history, this convo really touched my heart. I was also impressed by her academic accomplishments and determination to thrive, to do more than struggle and strive as she embarks upon adulthood. No doubt, her childhood experiences have helped to shape her aspirations. Children who live with trauma have had to build their own survival toolkits, for sure. But they shouldn't have to. They should get the opportunity to be children. And this doesn't occur nearly enough for Black children.So, as I interviewed Tammy, I thought about the need to create a collective Visionary bandwidth for our children who are navigating life with untreated mentally ill (and addicted) parents. We shouldn’t be expected to help all the babies on our own. That leads to burnout. But to connect our individual bandwidths? This is doable and responsible.So, here are some Nuggets for us Village Visionaries to chew on: The trauma and confusion of being uprooted time and time again when a parent has a mental illness that goes untreated.The irrational expectation for a child to be “strong” as opposed to adults surrounding that child in love and light as she builds healthy resilience.The trauma that institutions like law enforcement compound black children’s lives with when they murder us in the street and our children are left to process it with little or questionable guidance.The importance of our black and brown children being exposed to the world so that they know that their interests do not belong to white folks; that there is no such thing as white folks’ activities. Our children belong wherever they want to be. Tammy’s vision for educators: Pay attention and don't ignore signs of neglect.It all comes back to Compassion- for ourselves and our babies; it’s the cure. Let’s start thinking about how we can create a collective Visionary bandwidth so that the children of mentally ill parents don’t have to get to that "breaking point"-- and we don’t burn out. NOTE: Unfortunately, the audio is wonky-family life is happening in the background- but I hope that you’ll find that Tammy’s story is worth it.DM me on the INSTAGRAM @zenani116 if you have any Visionary ideas that you’d like  me to share on the podcast. I would love to hear from you!CTA: Do the Podcast-Listener Thing: Follow. Subscribe. Rate. Review.