Rules Without Relationship Equals Rebellion

Your relationship with your children is going to be the foundation for everything you do. If you try to enforce rules without having a strong relationship first, you end up with rebellion and strife. Listen in to Scott and Chad talk about how to develop trust with your children and why being a safe but firm authority figure is the foundation of a healthy relationship. Chad tells the story of how his daughter asked to have a cell phone in 7th grade and the reasons why he and his wife thought it wasn't the best idea. There is no substitute to spending time with your kids. If you find your children rebelling against your rules, you need to start by investing more time with them. The more you connect and show them that they are your priority, the more trust and depth of a relationship you will have. Don’t ask them about their day when you are staring at your phone. Give them your full undistracted attention and show them that you care. If you have more than one child, spend time with each of them one-on-one. You need to have a relationship built on trust in order to have difficult conversations or lay down rules. Every kid will push boundaries eventually. When that happens the goal is to be a safe wall and avoid blowing your top. Be the safe wall that your kids can bounce off of safely. Your kids will understand the rules and the boundaries better when they know they are part of a family unit. What your family stands for flows into your children’s relationship with the rules. Both Scott and Chad have family mottos that encourage everyone in their family to overcome challenges and hardships. This value structure leads to kids that feel confident and resilient, and encouraged to be their best selves. We want kids to be strong-willed, independent, and willing to stand up for what’s right, but that can only be established and enforced within a family where the relationships are built on love and trust. Chick-fil-A’s corporate culture is a good example of how results come from the quality of your relationships. They use the SERVE core values in the business. See and shape the future, Engage and develop others, Reinvent continuously, Value results and relationships, Embody the values You can hold people accountable and build great relationships at the same time. The best leaders have great relationships with their people.     Mentioned in This Episode: gravystack.com/smart smartmoneyparenting.com Smart, Not Spoiled: The 7 Money Skills Kids Must Master Before Leaving the Nest by Chad Willardson Value Creation Kid: The Healthy Struggles Your Children Need to Succeed by Scott Donnell and Lee Benson Scott Donnell on LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/donnell-scott Chad Willardson on LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/chadwillardson Scott Donnell on Instagram - @imscottdonnell Chad Willardson on Instagram - @chad.willardson Scott Donnell on TikTok - @imscottdonnell