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Stop "Shoulding" Yourself

An episode of the Positively Real Podcast podcast, hosted by Brittny King, titled "Stop "Shoulding" Yourself" was published on February 14, 2025 and runs 18 minutes.

February 14, 2025 ·18m · Positively Real Podcast

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Hello, my beautiful friends! Today, we're diving into a habit that's sneaky, sticky, and oh-so-familiar: shoulding on ourselves.

In this episode, we're talking all about the "shoulds" that weigh us down—the external pressures, internal beliefs, and societal narratives that tell us we should be doing more, achieving faster, or feeling differently than we do. Sound familiar? Don't worry—I've got you covered with practical steps to shift from "should" to want and feel more aligned and present in your life.

What You'll Learn:

  • What "shoulding" actually means: Why we place unrealistic expectations on ourselves and how it leads to guilt, frustration, and burnout.
  • The sneaky sources of "shoulding": From family expectations to social media comparisons, we'll explore where these patterns come from.
  • How to break free from the "should" cycle: Learn how to notice, question, and reframe your "shoulds" into authentic desires that align with your core values.

Key Takeaways:

  • Awareness is everything: Start by noticing your "should" statements. Where are you placing pressure on yourself to meet someone else's standards?
  • Shift from "should" to "choose": Instead of "I should go to yoga," try "I choose to go to yoga because it makes me feel good." Feel that difference?
  • Curiosity over guilt: When you catch a "should," get curious: "Where did this belief come from? Is it mine, or did I inherit it?"
  • Redefine success on your terms: Your success isn't measured by how much you do but by how aligned, present, and fulfilled you feel.

Here’s a challenge for you: Make a list of every "should" that pops into your head this week. Then, question each one: Why do I feel this way? What would I choose instead? And remember my favorite mantra: You are exactly where you're meant to be.

Links & Resources:

  • Follow me on Instagram: @brittnyking_
  • Join my 6-week Breathwork Integration Coaching Series to dive deeper into self-trust and transformation. DM me for details!
  • Share your reflections with me! Send a voice note, DM, or tag me on social media—I’d love to hear from you.
  • Subscribe to the podcast so you don’t miss an episode!

If this episode resonated with you, share it with a friend who might need a little less "should" in their life. Until next time, trust the timing of your life—you're right on time, my friend.

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