The Moon And Sixpence 34.4

He paused aminute, and I saw that what he had to tell me was very hard to say.

"When Iwent she wouldn't speak to me. She told them to send me away. I swore that Iforgave her everything, but she wouldn't listen. She tried to beat her headagainst the wall. The doctor told me that I mustn't remain with her. She kepton saying, `Send him away!' I went, and waited in the studio. And when theambulance came and they put her on a stretcher, they made me go in the kitchenso that she shouldn't know I was there. "

While I dressed-- for Stroeve wished me to go at once with him to the hospital -- he told methat he had arranged for his wife to have a private room, so that she might atleast be spared the sordid promiscuity of a ward. On our way he explained to mewhy he desired my presence; if she still refused to see him, perhaps she wouldsee me. He begged me to repeat to her that he loved her still; he wouldreproach her for nothing, but desired only to help her; he made no claim onher, and on her recovery would not seek to induce her to return to him; shewould be perfectly free.

他沉吟了一会儿，我看出来他下面要告诉我的一番话是很难启齿的。

“我去了以后她不同我讲话。她告诉他们叫我走开。我向她发誓，不管她做过什么事我都原谅她，但是她根本不听我讲话。她把头往墙上撞。医生叫我不要待在她身边。她不住口地叫喊：‘叫他走开！’我只好离开她身边，在画室里等着。等救护车来了，他们把她抬上担架的时候，他们叫我躲进厨房去，让她以为我已经离开那里了。”

在我穿衣服的当儿——因为施特略夫要我立刻同他一起到医院去——，他告诉我他已经在医院为他的妻子安排了一个单间病室，免得她住在人群混杂、空气污浊的大病房。走在路上的时候他又向我解释，为什么他要我陪他去——如果她仍然拒绝同他见面，也许她愿意见我。他求我转告她，他仍然爱她，他丝毫也不责怪她，只希望能帮她一点儿忙。他对她没有任何要求，在她病好以后决不劝说她回到自己身边，她是绝对自由的。