Boys & Boardrooms

Welcome to Boys & Boardrooms. This is where it begins.For most of my life I was running on a pattern I couldn't see. Being chosen — by the right partner, for the right role, in the right room — was the metric I kept reaching for. I called it ambition. I called it taste. I called it knowing what I wanted. None of those names were accurate. In this opening episode of Boys & Boardrooms, I name the pattern — validation dependency — and walk through how it installed itself in me.I share:— What validation dependency actually is, and why it is invisible to the people running on it — The first relationship at 16 that taught my nervous system what being chosen felt like — The last relationship that showed me the ceiling of the pattern, and the question underneath it: who am I if I'm not being chosen? — How the same operating system that ran my romantic life ran my career, and why my nervous system never knew the difference between a relationship and a job title — What it costs to build a life that looks like confidence and runs on approvalThis episode is the foundation of the show. The frame I'll hold against every story that follows — my own and my guests'.Follow me on Instagram at @advance_with_andi to catch when new episodes drop.

If Episode 1 was about being chosen, this one is about being needed. Same engine. Different costume.For years I was the person people came to — the colleague who could carry, the friend who could hold space, the partner who absorbed everyone else's emotional weather. I called it leadership, loyalty, or just being a good person. None of those names were accurate.In this episode of Boys & Boardrooms, I introduce a specific shape validation dependency takes — emotional containment — and walk through how it shows up at work, in the people we love, and in the work I am still doing in my own life.I share:— What containment actually is, and the one-word tell that gives it away every time — The colleague who burned out trying to hold her direct report up, and what her story tells you about yours — The three questions I use to figure out whether you are supporting someone or quietly carrying themEpisode 1 named the pattern. This episode shows you one of the shapes it takes in capable, generous, high-functioning people. There will be more.Follow me on @advance_with_andi to catch when new episodes drop, and check out the Validation Pattern Quiz referenced on the show here.