Canon Brawl

Welcome back to Canon Brawl! Lock and load your BFGs and step through the Ark, because we’re blasting our way through the dark corridors of the 2005 sci-fi action staple: Doom.We’re venturing into the UAC’s quarantined Olduvai Research Facility on Mars to discuss Andrzej Bartkowiak’s controversial take on the grandfather of all first-person shooters. We’re breaking down Karl Urban’s gritty turn as John "Reaper" Grimm, Rosamund Pike trying her best to sell us on that 24th-chromosome genetic mutation jargon, and Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson’s unforgettable, scenery-chewing heel turn as Sarge. From the baffling decision to swap literal demons from Hell for science-gone-wrong mutants, to that iconic, dizzying five-minute first-person shooter sequence, we’re dissecting whether this flick is a misunderstood sci-fi romp or just another victim of the video game movie curse.Stick around as we recast this Rapid Response Tactical Squad for a modern audience, test our Mars survival knowledge with some UAC-sponsored trivia, and see if Reaper and Sarge can blast their way to a respectable spot on our leaderboard among the other adaptations we’ve tackled so far!Join us in an all-new episode of Canon Brawl!

Welcome back to Canon Brawl! Drop your green herbs and reload your shotguns, because we’re dropping our first-ever mini-bonus episode to tackle the internet's latest obsession: the brand-new trailer for Zach Cregger's Resident Evil.We’re venturing into the polarizing new vision from the director behind Barbarian and Weapons to discuss a teaser that has the survival horror community completely split. We’re breaking down Austin Abrams' grounded turn as a medical courier, the bold (and highly controversial) decision to sideline literally anybody else from the games, and the sheer chaotic tension of an ordinary guy trying to survive a Raccoon City outbreak. From the eerie snowy farmhouse to the absolute nightmare of the infected raining down from city rooftops, we’re dissecting whether this fresh, original story is the terrifying adrenaline shot the cinematic franchise needs, or just a generic horror movie wearing an Umbrella Corporation nametag.Stick around as we analyze the trailer's hidden Easter eggs and make our wildest predictions about what's lurking in the shadows.Join us in an all-new first-ever bonus mini-episode of Canon Brawl!

Welcome back to Canon Brawl! Dim the lights and keep your flashlight handy because we’re diving deep into the shadows of the infamous 2005 supernatural thriller: Alone in the Dark.We’re venturing into the baffling world of director Uwe Boll to discuss one of the most notorious video game adaptations ever put to film. We’re breaking down Christian Slater’s turn as the paranormal investigator Edward Carnby, the truly bewildering casting of Tara Reid as an archaeologist, and the heavy-handed exposition that struggles to make sense of those ancient Abkani artifacts. From the inexplicable 10-minute opening text crawl to the frantic, epilectic action sequences, we’re dissecting whether this is a misunderstood cult relic or the definitive poster child for mid-2000s cinematic chaos.Stick around as we recast this paranormal investigation for a modern audience, test our lore knowledge with some Bureau 713-sponsored trivia, and see if Edward Carnby can find a respectable spot on our leaderboard among the other adaptations we’ve tackled so far!Join us in an all-new episode of Canon Brawl!

Welcome back to Canon Brawl! Dim the lights and keep your flashlight handy because we’re diving deep into the shadows of the infamous 2005 supernatural thriller: Alone in the Dark.We’re venturing into the baffling world of director Uwe Boll to discuss one of the most notorious video game adaptations ever put to film. We’re breaking down Christian Slater’s turn as the paranormal investigator Edward Carnby, the truly bewildering casting of Tara Reid as an archaeologist, and the heavy-handed exposition that struggles to make sense of those ancient Abkani artifacts. From the inexplicable 10-minute opening text crawl to the frantic, epilectic action sequences, we’re dissecting whether this is a misunderstood cult relic or the definitive poster child for mid-2000s cinematic chaos.Stick around as we recast this paranormal investigation for a modern audience, test our lore knowledge with some Bureau 713-sponsored trivia, and see if Edward Carnby can find a respectable spot on our leaderboard among the other adaptations we’ve tackled so far!Join us in an all-new episode of Canon Brawl!

Welcome back to Canon Brawl! Lock and load your Berettas and prepare for a frantic dash through Raccoon City as we tackle the 2004 sequel: Resident Evil: Apocalypse.We’re dropping into the heart of the Hive’s aftermath to discuss the high-octane expansion of the Umbrella universe. We’re breaking down the pitch-perfect casting of Jill Valentine, the introduction of the legendary (and surprisingly practical) Nemesis, and Alice’s transition into full-blown, gravity-defying superhero territory. From the church showdown to the "S.T.A.R.S." of it all, we’re dissecting whether this is the ultimate fan-service follow-up or a chaotic symptom of mid-2000s action excess.Stick around as we recast the Raccoon City evacuation for a modern era, test our tactical knowledge with some Umbrella-sponsored trivia, and see where this zombie-infested sequel ranks on our leaderboard of everything else we’ve watched so far!Join us in an all-new episode of Canon Brawl!

Welcome back to Canon Brawl! Lock and load your Berettas and prepare for a frantic dash through Raccoon City as we tackle the 2004 sequel: Resident Evil: Apocalypse.We’re dropping into the heart of the Hive’s aftermath to discuss the high-octane expansion of the Umbrella universe. We’re breaking down the pitch-perfect casting of Jill Valentine, the introduction of the legendary (and surprisingly practical) Nemesis, and Alice’s transition into full-blown, gravity-defying superhero territory. From the church showdown to the "S.T.A.R.S." of it all, we’re dissecting whether this is the ultimate fan-service follow-up or a chaotic symptom of mid-2000s action excess.Stick around as we recast the Raccoon City evacuation for a modern era, test our tactical knowledge with some Umbrella-sponsored trivia, and see where this zombie-infested sequel ranks on our leaderboard of everything else we’ve watched so far!Join us in an all-new episode of Canon Brawl!

Welcome back to Canon Brawl! Reload your light guns and prepare for a pulse-pounding (and head-scratching) trip to Isla de la Muerte as we tackle the 2003 video game adaptation: House of the Dead.We’re braving the ultimate rave-turned-nightmare to discuss Uwe Boll’s infamous debut into the world of gaming cinema, the inexplicable decision to splice in literal arcade footage during gunfights, and the sheer 2000s energy of a group of students fighting off the undead in 360-degree slow motion. From the "bullet time" choreography to the baffling narrative choices, we’re dissecting whether this flick is a "so-bad-it's-good" cult classic or if it’s simply a "Game Over" for the genre.Stick around as we recast this zombie outbreak for a modern era, test our survival skills with some arcade-caliber trivia, and see where this island of horror ranks on our leaderboard of everything else we’ve watched so far!Join us in an all-new episode of Canon Brawl!

Welcome back to Canon Brawl! Reload your light guns and prepare for a pulse-pounding (and head-scratching) trip to Isla de la Muerte as we tackle the 2003 video game adaptation: House of the Dead.We’re braving the ultimate rave-turned-nightmare to discuss Uwe Boll’s infamous debut into the world of gaming cinema, the inexplicable decision to splice in literal arcade footage during gunfights, and the sheer 2000s energy of a group of students fighting off the undead in 360-degree slow motion. From the "bullet time" choreography to the baffling narrative choices, we’re dissecting whether this flick is a "so-bad-it's-good" cult classic or if it’s simply a "Game Over" for the genre.Stick around as we recast this zombie outbreak for a modern era, test our survival skills with some arcade-caliber trivia, and see where this island of horror ranks on our leaderboard of everything else we’ve watched so far!Join us in an all-new episode of Canon Brawl!

Welcome back to Canon Brawl! Grab your dual pistols and prepare for a global trek as we follow Angelina Jolie into the 2003 action-adventure sequel: Lara Croft: Tomb Raider – The Cradle of Life.We’re diving deep into underwater temples and wingsuiting off skyscrapers to discuss Lara’s race against time to find Pandora’s Box, a pre-fame Gerard Butler’s "charming rogue" energy, and the sheer audacity of a movie that lets its lead punch a great white shark in the face. From the high-speed Great Wall chase to the kinetic direction of Jan de Bont, we’re dissecting how this sequel leaned into the "bigger is better" mentality and whether it managed to improve on its predecessor or if it succumbed to the weight of its own ambition.Stick around as we recast this artifact hunt for a modern era, test our wits with some Croft-caliber trivia, and see where this globetrotting sequel ranks on our leaderboard of everything else we’ve watched so far!Join us in an all-new episode of Canon Brawl!

Welcome back to Canon Brawl! Grab your dual pistols and prepare for a global trek as we follow Angelina Jolie into the 2003 action-adventure sequel: Lara Croft: Tomb Raider – The Cradle of Life.We’re diving deep into underwater temples and wingsuiting off skyscrapers to discuss Lara’s race against time to find Pandora’s Box, a pre-fame Gerard Butler’s "charming rogue" energy, and the sheer audacity of a movie that lets its lead punch a great white shark in the face. From the high-speed Great Wall chase to the kinetic direction of Jan de Bont, we’re dissecting how this sequel leaned into the "bigger is better" mentality and whether it managed to improve on its predecessor or if it succumbed to the weight of its own ambition.Stick around as we recast this artifact hunt for a modern era, test our wits with some Croft-caliber trivia, and see where this globetrotting sequel ranks on our leaderboard of everything else we’ve watched so far!Join us in an all-new episode of Canon Brawl!

Welcome back to Canon Brawl! Descend into the Raccoon City underground with us to face the 2002 action-horror juggernaut that started a cinematic dynasty: Resident Evil.We’re navigating the twisty, sterile corridors of The Hive to discuss Alice’s amnesiac awakening, Michelle Rodriguez’s peak "tough-as-nails" energy, and a Red Queen who really isn't afraid to let the elevators drop. From the iconic (and traumatizing) laser hallway to the pulse-pounding industrial score, we’re dissecting how Paul W.S. Anderson traded slow-burn survival horror for high-octane action and managed to break the "video game movie curse"—for better or worse.Stick around as we recast this thing to see who else could survive a T-Virus outbreak, sharpen our wits with some Umbrella-approved trivia, and see where this leather-clad zombie-slayer ranks on our leaderboard of everything else we’ve watched so far!Join us in an all-new episode of Canon Brawl!

Welcome back to Canon Brawl! Descend into the Raccoon City underground with us to face the 2002 action-horror juggernaut that started a cinematic dynasty: Resident Evil.We’re navigating the twisty, sterile corridors of The Hive to discuss Alice’s amnesiac awakening, Michelle Rodriguez’s peak "tough-as-nails" energy, and a Red Queen who really isn't afraid to let the elevators drop. From the iconic (and traumatizing) laser hallway to the pulse-pounding industrial score, we’re dissecting how Paul W.S. Anderson traded slow-burn survival horror for high-octane action and managed to break the "video game movie curse"—for better or worse.Stick around as we recast this thing to see who else could survive a T-Virus outbreak, sharpen our wits with some Umbrella-approved trivia, and see where this leather-clad zombie-slayer ranks on our leaderboard of everything else we’ve watched so far!Join us in an all-new episode of Canon Brawl!

Welcome back to Canon Brawl! Sync your bio-etheric signatures and prepare to save Earth as we tackle the 2001 CGI milestone that promised to change cinema forever: Final Fantasy: The Spirits Within.We’re boarding the Black Boa to discuss Dr. Aki Ross’s groundbreaking (and slightly uncanny) digital debut, a star-studded voice cast featuring a very intense Alec Baldwin and a classic Steve Buscemi performance, and the philosophical "Gaia theory" plot that left casual moviegoers wondering where the chocobos were hidden. From the terrifying, transparent Phantoms to the sheer audacity of Square’s $137 million gamble, we’re breaking down every pixel of this ambitious sci-fi experiment.As always, we head back to the casting couch to see if we can recruit a live-action crew for this mission, testing our RPG knowledge with some high-stakes trivia, and seeing where this gorgeous, misunderstood odyssey lands on our leaderboard of everything else we’ve watched so far!Join us in an all-new episode of Canon Brawl!

Welcome back to Canon Brawl! Sync your bio-etheric signatures and prepare to save Earth as we tackle the 2001 CGI milestone that promised to change cinema forever: Final Fantasy: The Spirits Within.We’re boarding the Black Boa to discuss Dr. Aki Ross’s groundbreaking (and slightly uncanny) digital debut, a star-studded voice cast featuring a very intense Alec Baldwin and a classic Steve Buscemi performance, and the deeply philosophical plot that left casual moviegoers wondering where the chocobos were. From the terrifying, transparent Phantoms to the sheer audacity of Square’s $137 million gamble, we’re breaking down every pixel of this ambitious sci-fi experiment.As always, we head back to the casting couch to see if we can recruit a better crew for this mission, test our knowledge with some high-stakes trivia, and see where this gorgeous, misunderstood odyssey lands on our leaderboard of everything else we’ve watched so far!Join us in an all-new episode of Canon Brawl!

Welcome back to Canon Brawl! Grab your dual pistols and prepare to raid some ancient ruins as we tackle the 2001 action spectacle that brought one of gaming’s biggest icons to the big screen: Lara Croft: Tomb Raider.We’re diving into the tombs to discuss Angelina Jolie’s pitch-perfect casting, the confusingly high stakes of the Illuminati’s quest for the Triangle of Light, and a pre-Bond Daniel Craig sporting an accent that is... certainly a choice. From the "bungee-ballet" home invasion to the planetary alignment antics, we’re breaking down every relic and ridiculous set piece in Lara’s first cinematic outing.As always, we also head back to the casting couch to see if we can recruit a better team of treasure hunters, testing our archaeological knowledge with trivia, and seeing where this globetrotting adventure lands on our leaderboard of everything else we've watched so far!Join us in an all-new episode of Canon Brawl!

Welcome back to Canon Brawl! Grab your dual pistols and prepare to raid some ancient ruins as we tackle the 2001 action spectacle that brought one of gaming’s biggest icons to the big screen: Lara Croft: Tomb Raider.We’re diving into the tombs to discuss Angelina Jolie’s pitch-perfect casting, the confusingly high stakes of the Illuminati’s quest for the Triangle of Light, and a pre-Bond Daniel Craig sporting an accent that is... certainly a choice. From the "bungee-ballet" home invasion to the planetary alignment antics, we’re breaking down every relic and ridiculous set piece in Lara’s first cinematic outing.As always, we also head back to the casting couch to see if we can recruit a better team of treasure hunters, testing our archaeological knowledge with trivia, and seeing where this globetrotting adventure lands on our leaderboard of everything else we've watched so far!Join us in an all-new episode of Canon Brawl!

Welcome back to Canon Brawl! Strap in and prepare to jump into deep space as we tackle the 1999 sci-fi odyssey that proved even the creator can’t always save the source material: Wing Commander.We’re diving into the cockpit to discuss the "submarines in space" physics, and the infamous Kilrathi—who were... certainly something. From the "Pilgrim" subplot that came out of nowhere to the acting clinic put on by Matthew Lillard, we’re breaking down everything about this mission.As always, we also head back to the casting couch to see if we can recruit a crew worth flying with, testing our navigation skills with trivia, and seeing where this sortie lands on our leaderboard of everything else we've watched so far!Join us in an all-new episode of Canon Brawl!

Welcome back to Canon Brawl! Strap in and prepare to jump into deep space as we tackle the 1999 sci-fi odyssey that proved even the creator can’t always save the source material: Wing Commander.We’re diving into the cockpit to discuss the "submarines in space" physics, and the infamous Kilrathi—who were... certainly something. From the "Pilgrim" subplot that came out of nowhere to the acting clinic put on by Matthew Lillard, we’re breaking down everything about this mission.As always, we also head back to the casting couch to see if we can recruit a crew worth flying with, testing our navigation skills with trivia, and seeing where this sortie lands on our leaderboard of everything else we've watched so far!Join us in an all-new episode of Canon Brawl!

Welcome back to Canon Brawl! Brace yourselves for total "Animality" as we tackle the 1997 sequel that proved sometimes, victory comes with a very heavy price: Mortal Kombat: Annihilation.We’re diving deep into the chaotic production that replaced almost the entire cast, upped the stakes to world-ending proportions, and gave us CGI dragons that looked… well, let’s just say the 90s were a difficult time for CGI From Shao Kahn’s questionable family dynamics to the infamous line delivery, we’re breaking down why this sequel remains one of the most baffling artifacts in gaming history.To close out the realm-merger, we’re heading back to the casting couch to try to salvage Mortal Kombat: Abomination, testing each other's might with trivia, and ranking this movie on the leaderboard of everything else we've watched so far!Join us in an all-new episode of Canon Brawl!

Welcome back to Canon Brawl! Brace yourselves for total "Animality" as we tackle the 1997 sequel that proved sometimes, victory comes with a very heavy price: Mortal Kombat: Annihilation.We’re diving deep into the chaotic production that replaced almost the entire cast, upped the stakes to world-ending proportions, and gave us CGI dragons that looked… well, let’s just say the 90s were a difficult time for CGI From Shao Kahn’s questionable family dynamics to the infamous line delivery, we’re breaking down why this sequel remains one of the most baffling artifacts in gaming history.To close out the realm-merger, we’re heading back to the casting couch to try to salvage Mortal Kombat: Abomination, testing each other's might with trivia, and ranking this movie on the leaderboard of everything else we've watched so far!Join us in an all-new episode of Canon Brawl!

Welcome back to Canon Brawl! For the next leg of our quest to review every video game movie ever made, we test our might against the 1995 cult favorite, Mortal Kombat.How did the ultra-violent arcade sensation transform into a PG-13 cinematic staple of the mid-90s? We’re breaking down the "flawless victory" of Cary-Hiroyuki Tagawa’s iconic Shang Tsung, the choice to cast Christopher Lambert as a giggling Thunder God, and the CG effects that haven’t aged quite as well as that legendary, pulse-pounding techno theme song. We’ll be comparing this roster of kombatants to their digitized arcade origins to see who actually looked the part and who was just there to provide a "fatality" for the highlight reel.To finish the fight, we’re putting our casting director hats back on to recast the movie for a modern audience. Who has the martial arts prowess to lead Earthrealm as Liu Kang, and who could possibly deliver the line “Your soul is mine” with as much venomous charisma as the original? Tune in and find out.

Welcome back to Canon Brawl! For the next leg of our quest to review every video game movie ever made, we test our might against the 1995 cult favorite, Mortal Kombat.How did the ultra-violent arcade sensation transform into a PG-13 cinematic staple of the mid-90s? We’re breaking down the "flawless victory" of Cary-Hiroyuki Tagawa’s iconic Shang Tsung, the choice to cast Christopher Lambert as a giggling Thunder God, and the CG effects that haven’t aged quite as well as that legendary, pulse-pounding techno theme song. We’ll be comparing this roster of kombatants to their digitized arcade origins to see who actually looked the part and who was just there to provide a "fatality" for the highlight reel.To finish the fight, we’re putting our casting director hats back on to recast the movie for a modern audience. Who has the martial arts prowess to lead Earthrealm as Liu Kang, and who could possibly deliver the line “Your soul is mine” with as much venomous charisma as the original? Tune in and find out.

Welcome back to Canon Brawl! For the third stop on our quest to review every video game movie ever made, we’re trading the neon ruins of New Angeles for the geopolitical chaos of Shadaloo. It’s time to face the 1994 cult classic Street Fighter.How did Capcom’s legendary fighting game transform into a campy, high-stakes military ensemble led by a very intense Jean-Claude Van Damme and a legendary, scene-chewing Raul Julia? We’re diving into the legendary production nightmares and trying to understand why Blanka looks like he fell into a vat of radioactive guacamole. We’ll be comparing the massive roster of World Warriors to their pixelated counterparts to see if anyone actually remembered to throw a hadouken.And to round things out, we’re putting our casting director hats back on to recast the entire movie. Who has the charisma to lead the Allied Nations and who can fill the formidable boots of M. Bison for a modern audience? Tune in and find out.

Welcome back to Canon Brawl! For the third stop on our quest to review every video game movie ever made, we’re trading the neon ruins of New Angeles for the geopolitical chaos of Shadaloo. It’s time to face the 1994 cult classic Street Fighter.How did Capcom’s legendary fighting game transform into a campy, high-stakes military ensemble led by a very intense Jean-Claude Van Damme and a legendary, scene-chewing Raul Julia? We’re diving into the legendary production nightmares and trying to understand why Blanka looks like he fell into a vat of radioactive guacamole. We’ll be comparing the massive roster of World Warriors to their pixelated counterparts to see if anyone actually remembered to throw a hadouken.And to round things out, we’re putting our casting director hats back on to recast the entire movie. Who has the charisma to lead the Allied Nations and who can fill the formidable boots of M. Bison for a modern audience? Tune in and find out.

Welcome back to Canon Brawl! For the second stop on our massive quest to review every video game movie ever made, we’re trading the brothers for... the brothers, and heading into the post-apocalyptic, neon-soaked ruins of New Angeles: the 1994 martial arts odyssey, Double Dragon.How did a straightforward arcade beat-'em-up about rescuing a girlfriend from a street gang become a campy, water-logged adventure featuring a hybrid of Mark McGrath and T-1000 for a villain and a speedboat full of slapstick? We’re diving deep into the production, analyzing the "Power of the Medallion," and trying to figure out why Abobo looks like he was made out of discarded chewing gum. We’ll compare Ug and Home Lee to their pixelated counterparts to see if the spirit of the arcade cabinets made it to the big screen.And to finish things off, we’re putting on our casting director hats once again to recast Double Dragon for 2026. Who has the chemistry and the kicks to lead a modern-day New Angeles? Tune in and find out.

Welcome back to Canon Brawl! For the second stop on our massive quest to review every video game movie ever made, we’re trading the brothers for... the brothers, and heading into the post-apocalyptic, neon-soaked ruins of New Angeles: the 1994 martial arts odyssey, Double Dragon.How did a straightforward arcade beat-'em-up about rescuing a girlfriend from a street gang become a campy, water-logged adventure featuring a hybrid of Mark McGrath and T-1000 for a villain and a speedboat full of slapstick? We’re diving deep into the production, analyzing the "Power of the Medallion," and trying to figure out why Abobo looks like he was made out of discarded chewing gum. We’ll compare Ug and Home Lee to their pixelated counterparts to see if the spirit of the arcade cabinets made it to the big screen.And to finish things off, we’re putting on our casting director hats once again to recast Double Dragon for 2026. Who has the chemistry and the kicks to lead a modern-day New Angeles? Tune in and find out.

Welcome to the series premiere of Canon Brawl! To kick off our 50-plus episode odyssey through every video game movie ever made, we are heading to Dinohattan to witness the birth of the genre: the 1993 live-action fever dream, Super Mario Bros.How did a game about jumping on mushrooms turn into a dystopian cyberpunk thriller involving de-evolution chambers and interdimensional fungus? We break down the chaotic production, dissect the entire plot, and hold it up against the Nintendo source material to see if any "canon" actually survived the transition.Finally, we wrap things up by throwing the original call sheet in the trash and recasting the entire movie for a modern audience. Come along for the ride.

Welcome to the series premiere of Canon Brawl! To kick off our 50-plus episode odyssey through every video game movie ever made, we are heading to Dinohattan to witness the birth of the genre: the 1993 live-action fever dream, Super Mario Bros.How did a game about jumping on mushrooms turn into a dystopian cyberpunk thriller involving de-evolution chambers and interdimensional fungus? We break down the chaotic production, dissect the entire plot, and hold it up against the Nintendo source material to see if any "canon" actually survived the transition.Finally, we wrap things up by throwing the original call sheet in the trash and recasting the entire movie for a modern audience. Come along for the ride.