1 Minute Political Update

U.S. forces exchanged drone, missile, and gun fire with Iranian vessels in the Persian Gulf, yet Donald Trump insists the ceasefire is holding—paging George Orwell!—while the Trump administration released thousands of never-before-seen files on UFOs. (Unless the aliens on those UFOs visited Epstein Island, no one gives a rat’s ass.)Sickened by democracy’s demise? Check out groups like The States Project. Stop vomiting, start volunteering.

The White House called “Star Wars” actor Mark Hamill a sick individual for sharing a social media post depicting an image of Donald Trump lying in a grave (but Trump posting an image of himself as Jesus is NOT sick) while Trump claimed peace with Iran is just around the corner (along with $2.00 a gallon gas).Sickened by democracy’s demise? Check out groups like Swing Left. Stop vomiting, start volunteering.

James Comey was indicted for posting a photo of seashells spelling 86 47, which Donald Trump said was clearly a death threat (this from a guy who boasts about being able to identify a farm animal). Meanwhile, Trump talked to a group of kids about the importance of physical fitness. (The kids laughed so hard milk came out of their noses.)

Lori Chavez-DeRemer resigned her position as secretary of labor for having an affair with a subordinate and drinking alcohol on the job (only the best people) while the Trump administration reclassified medical marijuana as a less dangerous drug (and reclassified fried foods as less dangerous than vegetables).Sickened by democracy’s demise? Check out groups like Swing Left. Stop vomiting, start volunteering. https://swingleft.org

Federal Reserve chair nominee Kevin Warsh told the Senate Banking Committee he was going to be totally independent of Donald Trump, not his sock puppet (yeah, right) while FBI Director Kash Patel is suing The Atlantic, claiming false reporting about his excessive drinking and many absences (yeah, right 2.0).Sickened by democracy’s demise? Check out groups like Indivisible. Stop vomiting, start volunteering.

During a prayer service, Pete Hegseth stated he was quoting scripture when in fact he was quoting the script for the film “Pulp Fiction”—holy mackerel!—while RFK, Jr. said the cabinet should not invoke the 25th Amendment against Donald Trump because there’s never been a saner president. (Please make it stop!)Sickened by democracy’s demise? Check out groups like The States Project. Stop vomiting, start volunteering.#trump, #trumpnews, #politics, #iranwar #RFKjr

Donald Trump told struggling Las Vegas small business owners the economy is booming, and gas prices are not remotely high—clearly, we know who IS high—while Pope Leo XIV preaches the gospel—as in blessed are the peacemakers—to counteract Trump preaching the offal. Sickened by democracy’s demise? Check out groups like Indivisible. Stop vomiting, start volunteering.

Donald Trump claimed the image of himself on social media healing a sick man wasn’t Jesus but rather a doctor because he makes people better—can we get a second opinion?—while he continued to attack Pope Leo XIV, saying the doesn’t want a pope who’s critical of the U.S. president. (Can we get another president?)

Donald Trump is threatening to blockade the Strait of Hormuz (from one gas bag to another) while at the same time, he’s claiming that Hungary’s Viktor Orban’s election loss was rigged due to millions of dead people sending in illegal mail-in ballots from the grave. (He didn’t actually say that but you know he’s thinking it.)

Iran is charging fees to oil tankers going through the Strait of Hormuz and Donald Trump says they better stop now (or he’ll take his bombs and go home) while Pope Leo XIV refused an invitation to visit the U.S. on July 4th because Pete Hegseth didn’t like his anti-war speech. (Only Hegseth would be irked that the Pope is against war.)Nauseous about democracy’s demise? Check out groups like Swing Left. Stop vomiting…start volunteering.

Pope Leo XIV said Donald Trump's threat to annihilate Iran was truly unacceptable then referred to him as “una mucca grassa” (a fat cow). Soon after, Trump backed down and agreed to a two-week ceasefire during which he expects the Strait of Hormuz to reopen. And if it doesn’t, he plans to hold his breath until it does. (One can only hope.) Nauseous about democracy’s demise? Check out groups like Indivisible. Stop vomiting…start volunteering.

Donald Trump threatened Iranian leaders via Truth Social, writing, “Open the effin’ Strait you crazy bastards or you’ll be living in hell” (that should do the trick) while he claimed the feds can’t fund Medicare and Medicaid because we’re fighting wars, telling states to pony up the cash. (Clearly, he sees Americans like his contractors—people to stiff.)

The Attorney General was canned by Donald Trump and the question on everyone’s mind is: didn’t she lie enough on his behalf? Meanwhile, Trump announced he’s going to hit Iran so hard they’ll end up back in the Stone Age—and no one knows more about the Stone Age than our neanderthal president.Nauseous about democracy’s demise? Check out groups like The States Project, Indivisible, and Swing Left. Stop vomiting…start volunteering.

Donald Trump claimed opening the Strait of Hormuz is the responsibility of countries that rely on it, not the U.S.—cue the laugh track—while a judge halted construction of the White House ballroom because only Congress can approve federal property alterations. (In Trump’s defense, he’s not altering the White House, just destroying it.)Dig democracy? You’ll dig The States Project. Dig deeper at statesproject.org.

In honor of America’s 250th birthday, Donald Trump’s signature will appear on future U.S. paper currency along with the Secretary of the Treasury. This is the first time a sitting president has ever done this. It’s also the first time a sitting president has ever printed currency in his basement.Dig Democracy? You’ll Dig This!The States Project helps quality candidates get elected to state legislatures. Dig deeper at statesproject.org. #trump #trumpnews #politics #thestatesproject

Donald Trump announced he’ll pay TSA agents who have not received a paycheck since the partial government shutdown—and by pay he means an IOU—while a 15-point U.S. peace plan was rejected out of hand by Iran because the plan was written in crayon.King George is dead! Long live No Kings Day (March 28)! Info at nokings.org.

A Florida state democrat flipped a house seat in a district that includes Mar-a-Lago (Trump can’t complain it was due to mail-in ballots because he used one himself) while Trump is convinced Iran will make a deal because they gave him a very big present—the Strait of Hormuz home game where he can pretend oil is flowing and gas is 22 cents a gallon.King George is dead! Long live No Kings Day (March 28)! Info at nokings.org#trump #trumpnews #Iran #politics

Due to longer lines at airports, ICE agents are being sent to U.S. airports to help TSA agents even though they have no training (make sure your suitcase is documented) while Trump delighted in the death of Robert Mueller because he had the audacity to do investigate Russia interfering in the 2016 election. (A class act—Mueller, not Trum.)King George is dead! Long live No Kings Day (March 28)! Info at nokings.org#trump #trumpnews #politics #news #nokings #trumpupdate

In a fundraising email, Donald Trump promised donors access to national security briefings for cash (paging Benedict Arnold!). Then while meeting with Japan’s Prime Minister, Trump explained that he didn’t alert allies to the bombing of Iran because he wanted it to be a surprise, you know, like Pearl Harbor. (Read the room much?)King George is dead! Long live No Kings Day (March 28)! Info at nokings.org.

After being rebuffed by NATO countries to help with the Iran war, Donald Trump said we don’t need their help. (Clearly, we can screw this up on our own). Meanwhile, a federal judge temporarily blocked health officials from cutting the number of childhood vaccines, saying RFK, Jr. didn’t base his decision on science. (There’s an understatement.)King George is dead! Long live No Kings Day (March 28)! Info at nokings.org.

Pete Hegseth blasted CNN for its biased coverage of the Iran war, saying he can’t wait for David Ellison to take over the news network (somewhere Walter Cronkite is projectile vomiting) while Donald Trump showered cabinet members with brand-new shoes so they wouldn’t wear sneakers to work. (If you can call what they do, work.)King George is dead! Long live No Kings Day (March 28)! Info at nokings.org.

U.S. gas prices have skyrocketed but Donald Trump is thrilled because higher oil prices mean we're making money (and by “we’re” he means “him”) while the world’s fertilizer supply is blocked in the Strait of Hormuz, leading to fewer crops being planted and higher grocery prices, which Trump will blame on Biden’s open borders.King George is dead! Long live No Kings Day (March 28)! Info at nokings.org.#trump #trumpnews #nokings

Attacks on Iranian oil depots and Middle East energy sites have caused oil to surge past $100 a barrel and pump prices to soar (Trump says it’s Biden’s fault) while Iran has named Ali Khamanei’s son Mojtaba to be its new Supreme Leader. (Trump says there’s only one Supreme Leader: Diana Ross.)King George is dead! Long live No Kings Day (March 28)! Info at nokings.org.

DESCRIPTIONDonald Trump fired DHS chief Kristi Noem, replacing her with Senator Markwayne Mullin—an election denier and all-around MAGA toady—while some American military leaders have told troops that the Iran war is part of God’s plan and that Trump has been chosen by Jesus to bring about Armageddon. (More likely, World War III.)King George is dead! Long live No Kings Day (March 28)! Info at nokings.org.

Gas prices are rising due to the Strait of Hormuz of closing, but Trump says they’ll come down once the war ends—or when pigs fly. Meanwhile Kristi Noem was grilled by senators who said she should apologize for calling murdered Americans Renee Good and Alex Pretti domestic terrorists, which she wouldn’t do. (Puppy killers are classy.)King George is dead! Long live No Kings Day (March 28)! Info at nokings.org.

After U.S. and Israeli bombs killed Supreme Leader Ali Khamanei, Donald Trump said he did it because he wants freedom for the Iranian people (but not the people of Minnesota) while RFK, Jr. announced his solution for high grocery prices: buy cheaper cuts of meat. (And you thought Trump was the only stable genius.)

Hillary Clinton told the House Oversight Committee she knew nothing about Jeffrey Epstein, adding that if they wanted the truth, they’d get Trump to testify (cue the flying pigs). Meanwhile, the FBI fired 10 agents who investigated Trump's handling of classified documents after his first term (cue Kash Patel kissing Trump’s keister).Dig democracy? No one digs it like The States Project. Dig deeper at statesproject.org.   

DESCRIPTIONIn his State of the Union speech, Donald Trump ignored the financial struggles of millions, claiming the economy is booming (next stop, the Twilight Zone) while Ann Coulter said his patriotic message reminder her that you can’t have an immigrant as president because love for country must be in your genes (next stop, Nuremberg).Dig democracy? No one digs it like The States Project. Dig deeper at statesproject.org.   

The Supreme Court struck down as unconstitutional Donald Trump’s global tariffs—at least some of the justices realize we HAVE a constitution—while a federal court said Louisiana public schools can display the Ten Commandments in every classroom. (Too bad there isn’t one that says Thou Shalt Not Ban Books.)Dig democracy? No one digs it like The States Project. Dig deeper at statesproject.org.   

After the U.S. Commission of Fine Arts—all Trump appointees—approved his 90,000-square-foot ballroom that’s bigger than the White House (but not his ego), Trump went to Rome, Georgia where he told supporters voter fraud was rampant, adding: “Like your city’s namesake, putting together a plan to steal an election wasn’t built in a day.” Dig democracy? No one digs it like The States Project. Dig deeper at statesproject.org.   

A federal judge ordered the Trump administration to return a slavery exhibit it removed from a Philadelphia museum—Trump believes slavery was a hoax—while officials say the Potomac River sewage spill hasn’t impacted drinking water quality but warned against contact with it, including fishing, kayaking, and dumping the Epstein files in it.Dig democracy? No one digs it like The States Project. Dig deeper at statesproject.org.   #trump #trumpnews #politics #trump 2026

Donald Trump seeks to revive the U.S. coal industry, branding it a key component of national and economic security (not to mention emphysema) while the Department of Homeland Security has sent social media companies subpoenas for the names of Americans who criticize ICE. (Freedom of speech is like milk—it has an expiration date.)Dig democracy? No one digs it like The States Project. Dig deeper at statesproject.org.   #trump #trumpnews #politics

Instead of answering House Democrats’ questions about the Epstein files, Pam Bondi praised Trump and the stock market (she’s a class act—hold the class) while House Republicans passed the SAVE America Act, which would require proof of citizenship to vote even though non-citizens don’t vote (another class act—again, hold the class).

Stephen Miller says ICE doesn’t have to follow the Constitution when it comes to obtaining a warrant to search someone’s home (jackboots, anyone?) while Donald Trump is excluding Democrats from the annual meeting of governors (jackass, anyone?).Dig democracy? No one digs it like The States Project. Dig deeper at statesproject.org.  #trump #trump2025 #politics #trumpnews

Donald Trump said yesterday’s Super Bowl half-time show with Bad Bunny was an affront to the greatness of America (racism, anyone?) while a federal judge unfroze funds for a New York City transportation project that Trump withheld unless he got Dulles Airport and Penn Station renamed for him (narcissism, anyone?)Dig democracy? No one digs it like The States Project. Dig deeper at statesproject.org.   

DESCRIPTIONAt the National Prayer Breakfast, Donald Trump called Kentucky Congressman Thomas Massie a moron and claimed you can’t be a person of faith and vote for a Democrat (how Christian of him) while economists said Trump has given us the worst January since the Great Depression (how thoughtful of him).

Donald Trump has called for U.S. elections to be nationalized despite the Constitution giving election oversight to the states (he claims the Constitution is a hoax) while Bill and Hillary Clinton will testify to the House Oversight Committee on Jeffrey Epstein (Bill because he was photographed with Epstein and Hillary because of her emails).Dig democracy? No one digs it like The States Project. Dig deeper at www.statesproject.org. 

Donald Trump is shutting down the Kennedy Center for renovations—expect a bowling alley and a multiplex theater that will run “Melania” around the clock—while Trump is suing Grammy Awards’ host Trevor Noah for making a joke about Trump wanting Greenland as a replacement for Epstein’s Island. (Not a funny joke but probably true.)

Donald Trump is suing the IRS for $10 billion for disclosing his tax returns to the media six years ago, saying it caused irreparable harm to his reputation—there’s no bottom, is there?—while at the same time, he’s allowing ICE to remain in Minnesota where they’re free to kill U.S. citizens and snatch up small children. (There’s still no bottom, is there?).Dig democracy? No one digs it like The States Project. Dig deeper at states project.org

Donald Trump announced he wants to de-escalate tensions in Minneapolis following the killing of two U.S. citizens by ICE by saying he wants to de-escalate tensions and not doing anything about it while Secretary of State Marco Rubio pledged to turn Venezuela from a criminal state to a criminal state run by a criminal U.S. president.

After ICE agents killed Alex Pretti, an ICU nurse who was helping a woman whom ICE pushed to the ground, Stephen Miller labeled him a would-be assassin (Joseph Goebbels would be proud) while Pam Bondi told Minnesota Governor Tim Walz law and order will be restored if he hands over the state’s voter rolls. (Extortion, anyone?)

Former January 6 Special Counsel Jack Smith testified in Congress about his case against Donald Trump where—spoiler alert—Republicans attacked him mercilessly while Trump inaugurated his Board of Peace, which is designed to maintain a ceasefire in Gaza and, in turn, earn Trump the coveted Board of Peace Prize.

Yesterday, Donald Trump touted his first-year accomplishments (not being impeached, for one) then told Norway’s prime minister that he’s going after Greenland because Norway didn’t give him the Nobel Peace Prize. (When told that the prize comes from the Norwegian Nobel Committee, not Norway, Trump retorted, “It’s Norway or the highway.”)

Pete Hegseth censured Senator Mark Kelly for telling military personnel not to follow illegal orders (What part of “don’t follow illegal orders” don’t you understand, Mr. Hegseth?) while Donald Trump said Renee Good—the Minneapolis mom killed by an ICE agent—was very disrespectful to law enforcement. (See 6, January.)

The DOJ is investigating Federal Reserve Chairman Jerome Powell for lying about the cost of renovating the Federal Reserve’s headquarters (cue the laugh track) while Donald Trump is threatening to attack Iran over their killing of peaceful protesters (cue the irony track).

Only 584,000 jobs were created last year, the lowest number since 2003—Donald Trump blamed it on Haberdasher Harry Truman—while ICE shot and killed Minneapolis resident Renee Good who was a law-abiding citizen and not a domestic terrorist, a charge made Kristi Noem (an actual domestic terrorist).

A White House website hailed the mob who stormed the U.S. Capitol five years ago on January 6 as peaceful protesters, claiming they were provoked by Nancy Pelosi—their baseness is bottomless—while the U.S. announced it will control Venezuelan oil exports indefinitely. (Shocking!)

The U.S. invaded Venezuela and arrested its president on drug charges even though Trump pardoned the former Honduran president who was convicted on drug charges—it makes perfect sense if you’re on drugs—while Congress called the invasion illegal. (Trump claimed the invasion was legal under his Gulf of Donkin Resolution.)

Donald Trump posted that the White House doctors proclaimed him to be in perfect health—they also said RFK, Jr. was a perfect HHS secretary—and that he aced his cognitive examination, which included naming several barnyard animals along with the ex-Honduran president and drug lord he pardoned.

Donald Trump issued the first vetoes of his second term: One was for clean drinking water in Colorado (“When blue states stop stealing elections, they’ll get clean drinking water!”) and the other was to expand the land of the Miccosukee Tribe in Florida. (He’s still pissed the Washington Redskins had to change their name.)