Adulting and Adrift

Join us as we discuss the 2024 election results, make sense of voting trends, and make predictions for the next few years. (0:00): Intro snippets (00:55): Surprised by election results? Breakdown by different groups (26:03): Predictions for next 4 years

In this episode, Kihong and Thomas celebrate one year of Adulting and Adrift and look back on past episodes :)

(0:00) Preview (1:10) Intro (3:00) Gun and Marianne introduce themselves (4:30) How did you meet? (10:30) Cultural differences - Korea vs. Finland (19:00) Sustaining a relationship while moving many times (23:00) Language dynamics in the relationship - role of English, Finnish, Korean (38:45) Advice for intercultural relationships (42:35) Commitment in relationships (47:40) Adjusting to life in the US

(0:00) Preview (1:56) Intro (5:30) High school and college (49:40) Relationships (58:05) Career (1:05:37) Family

(0:00) Preview (1:32) Intro: Current Events Recap - Trump, Harris, Stocks, Olympics, Boeing (8:05) Donald Trump's Attempted Assassination (13:45) Biden Stepping Down (22:00) Kamala Harris, Charli XCX, Tampon Tim and Political Memes (29:30) JD Vance, Hillbilly Elegy, Rise of MAGA, Nativism, and Immigration (1:03:25) Tim Walz, Josh Shapiro, Choosing a running mate (1:11:00) Stock Market Jitters, Bank of Japan, Uncertainty (1:17:43) Ukraine invading Russia

(2:00) AI-generated content on social media (4:30) Social Media and Gen-Z slang (13:09) Facebook going downhill (19:50) To exchange numbers or Instagram handles? (29:10) Getting cyberbullied (33:20) Attention spans, short-form content, viral trends (45:18) YouTube (48:37) Reddit (57:33) Spotify

(0:00) Highlights (2:23) Intro (3:52) What informs your value system? Kihong's turn (17:45) Actions, habits, and desire (23:55) What informs your value system? Thomas's turn (32:40) Cognitive biases (38:25) Civil discourse and cancel culture (48:55) Student protests (56:35) Applying value systems in your career and in the corporate world (1:00:45) Story of Franz Jaegerstaetter, conscientious objector in WWII (1:05:00) Utilitarianism (1:11:00) Trolley Problem

(0:00) - Clips (1:40) - Intro (2:30) - TikTok (12:42) - Messi in Boston (17:15) - Our friends are all getting married! (31:25) - Living with roommates (34:45) - Feedback from listeners on Love and Dating, Career

(07:30) Masculinity: race and culture mixed (18:00) Expectations growing up as boys: Thomas and Kihong’s story (25:00) Traditionally gendered spaces (30:30) Masculinity influencers (40:00) Talking about what’s going on - why it’s so hard to build a good platform of open discourse (44:30) Gender relations are at all-time low (49:00) Breaking down these “male influencers” (56:00) Having the right role model: how to guide future generations properly Please provide thoughts! Thomas and I understand that this is a sensitive topic and that we are two straight men talking about this. So please give us constructive criticism and add inputs. Thank you!

Intro (03:00) Intro to AI - birth of the concept and its evolution (14:00) Phase 2 of AI: the transformer architecture, element of attention (20:00) Why hardware is so important (23:00) AI vs. the human brain (30:00) How Kihong and Thomas first experienced AI (43:00) Core principles of “Safe AI” - possible? Maybe humans are the biggest risk…. (53:00) How Kihong and Thomas use AI at work (01:05:00) AI’s impact on career and capitalism, post-labor economics and UBI (01:16:00) Societal inequality within a country and between countries; mass exodus (01:19:00) Misinformation and low-quality content (01:24:00) How to co-exist with AI Outro Check out these links: Andrej Karpathy blog post from 2015: http://karpathy.github.io/2015/05/21/rnn-effectiveness/ 3blue1brown: https://www.youtube.com/c/3blue1brown A.I. Artificial Intelligence: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0212720/ Alphago vs. Lee Sedol https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/AlphaGo_versus_Lee_Sedol AI and UBI: https://finance.yahoo.com/news/elon-musk-predicts-universal-high-160015532.html?guccounter=1&guce_referrer=aHR0cHM6Ly93d3cuZ29vZ2xlLmNvbS8&guce_referrer_sig=AQAAACUPQMXHFNi_R9EqHBehchba-6AN8qYzZ2NEHuqglVJSoDdb6rzBDnsto7roPor5IPclW0elIFVyuhrEAY1TLqh2jYlzl1yvC7dhDQwnvOuGvnjJxvQNOiIqN13_5GaH0VySwjmm3gm2-_8tieGpJ42ccsbafIBNOdVcrlGzSMRT Post-labor economics: https://newatlas.com/technology/post-labor-economics-shapiro/

In this episode, Thomas and Kihong investigate the underlying dynamics of the so-called “elite” U.S. colleges and the post-college implications of such branding. They share insightful and surprising statistics - hope you enjoy this episode. Please leave comments or share thoughts directly. We appreciate any reactions. :) (5:30) By how much did the “elite” colleges expand vs. the rest in the last ~30 years? (10:00) Scarcity, brand, and satellite campuses (18:00) Open-sourcing education (25:00) Financial aid of “elite” colleges (29:30) The UC system - the one that worked (33:00) Inequality of education through privatization (40:00) What a high school senior should really think about (45:00) The great filtering - life after college (49:00) Why Kihong wanted to do this episode so much If you want to learn more about this topic through different channels, check out: Freakonomics - Episode 500: https://open.spotify.com/episode/6R2fvzdzmLRi3THmiWMY6U?si=1919a3b90249453d Episode 501: https://open.spotify.com/episode/5mDKTQ6iuiUg59Ghev2WOf?si=fae3dc4252a64546 Episode 502: https://open.spotify.com/episode/5eV24SuhVG9NFP2bnzvibf?si=e7bb77861bb34725 Episode 503: https://open.spotify.com/episode/6kBXTSJQcDaObF0QmwOAYG?si=b8442a1cd73e4cc9 Malcom Gladwell on elitism, dining, and colleges: https://open.spotify.com/episode/0sB5WgKiAyvFkkecvItEki?si=521680c3aa2a4c5e Operation Varsity Blues: The College Admissions Scandal

(0:00) Intro - brief overview of each of our backgrounds (5:43) Defining religion and spirituality (8:00) Positive/attractive aspects of religion (17:50) Doubts, cognitive biases, critiques of religion (41:46) Faith, spirituality, meditation, ethics (49:10) Question for Kihong: What value do you see in religion, spirituality, and meditation? (1:04:55) Discussing the play "A Case for the Existence of God"

Thomas and Kihong explores everything about friendship - what defines friendship, what helps people be good friends, how does it evolve over time? How do you navigate? (02:00) How do you define friendship? What is the best way to approach it? (14:00) What makes people become friends? Our stories and the element of chance (22:30) Is there such a thing as a best friend? Different levels of friendship? (33:00) Loneliness vs. Solitude (45:00) Connecting people, cultivating relationships, building a community, overcoming your fear (56:00) How friends influence your views and lifestyle? (01:12:00) Can a boy and a girl be friends? Controversial topic (01:23:00) How do you repair the relationship after arguing with a friend? We also started a YouTube channel!! Please search Adulting and Adrift, or click on this link: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCwL37EJNB3hFColLCcQsQJQ

(03:00) Our own histories with money (15:10) Money and status: fashion, music, and everything (19:10) Boomers vs. Gen Z narrative (35:10) Personal finance: Thomas’ story (49:10) Kihong’s journey with personal finance (01:06:10) Budgeting! (01:10:00) Credit scores and closing out

(00:00) Highlights + Intro (04:00) Andie’s childhood and how she ended up at a boarding school (17:15) The application process (25:00) First day of school and the importance of luck (30:30) Academics: the challenges; how to design your experience (40:10) Interacting with faculty as an Asian person (45:50) Designing life beyond boarding school, finding her true passions (50:00) Thomas on the shortcomings of what is taught as success in boarding schools (54:00) Posturing and systemic privilege (01:02:00) Life after boarding school and what Andie is looking forward to in 2024 (01:04:50) Would you send your kid?

(00:00) Highlights (02:30) Intro (05:30) Childhood, family, and sibling dynamics (21:50) Kihong's experiences (42:00) Being deliberate about little choices as parents (45:00) Rewards and punishments: a legitimate system of teaching children? (1:00:00) Why it’s so dangerous for parents to not communicate (1:04:00) Thomas talks about “training” (1:19:00) Kihong on South Korea’s low birth rate and the meaning of family (1:25:30) Thomas on the responsibilities and duties as a parent

(0:00) Introduction and Holidays Update (5:00) Today’s Topic: Job and Career (6:20) As a kid, what did you want to be when you grew up? (12:55) How did you end up in your current career trajectory? - Thomas (26:30) How did you end up in your current career trajectory? - Kihong (32:45) Finding a job based on passion, impact, and/or financial security (38:30) Work-life balance across industries and academia (49:30) What does your future trajectory look like?

(1:34) Importance of thoughts (7:30) Importance of mental fortitude against criticism (13:00) Importance of rest

(00:00) Intro - Kihong’s explanation on why he chose this book to discuss and the impact (02:40) Who was Dale Carnegie? (07:00) Part 1 Discussion (09:00) Kihong’s own experience of worry on health, Discussion of Part 2

(00:50) Intro (02:45) Asian-American or Asian and American (5:30) Thomas’ story: Born in US, grew up in Japan as a mixed race person (22:20) Kihong’s story: Asian lunchbox (26:00) Navigating through different friend groups (28:00) Different cultural values and priorities - how they impacted our lives (33:50) Speaking up for yourself and apologizing less (38:20) Asian representation in media and its impact (42:30) Kihong’s take on the late Korean culture’s popularity and the relatively short history of Asian immigration (45:45) Thomas on the Last Samurai (53:30) Asian names, Western conventions, and representation in science (1:01:13) "Model minority": the danger of narratives and expectations (1:11:00) Wrapping up

(1:00) Kihong’s story: 1st job and relationship (8:30) Therapy: it’s a journey (10:30) Why deep reflection is so importnat (14:30) Thomas’ story: post-college journey of self-discovery (19:45) Why Thomas gave teaching a try (24:00) People helping Thomas to get to where he is now (25:32) Discovering your own values (29:53) What helped Kihong: “Thoughts May Vary” podcast and Dale Carnegie’s book “How to stop worrying and start living” (33:10) Keeping yourself busy helps (37:40) What helped Thomas: therapy journals, building good habits, and art (45:30) building the right communities (48:00) Solitude vs. loneliness (52:30) Distancing yourself from your internal monologue (56:50) The irony of visibility: physical injury vs. depression (59:00) Start by acknowledging (1:02:00) Don’t seek happiness, seek contentment (1:05:15) Compassion, remain optimistic Thank you for listening. Mental health is a journey. Resources are available, and talking with a professional can be a valuable step if you are struggling. Resources Suicide and Crisis Hotine: Call 988 Thoughts May Vary podcast "How to stop worrying and start living" by Dale Carnegie We would like to be of any help to you in the process if we can -- feel free to contact us. Contact us Kihong: [email protected] Thomas: [email protected]

This episode is split into two parts, so please check back next week for the second part of our conversation, where we talk about mental health post-college and how we work on our mental well-being (00:00) Intro + Friendsgiving (04:30) Start to conversation (06:25) Kihong’s story: childhood (14:25) How to acknowledge generational effects and separate yourself from them (18:00) Thomas’ explanation of “theory of mind” and children (19:20) Thomas’ story: childhood (30:00) Emotional vulnerability (31:15) Disconnect from reality: how imagination is different from fantasy (35:49) Caring about how others perceive you (40:08) Thomas’ story: adolescence / teenage years (44:30) Journaling: outlet or storage? (45:45) Kihong’s story: high school years (51:10) Thomas’ story: high school years (56:20) Thomas’ story: college and feeling alone (1:05:45) Kihong’s story: college and luck (1:10:25) We are who we are because of things that happened to us (1:13:26) Outro + stay tuned for part 2!

(0:00) Intro + how did Thomas and Kihong get introduced to art? (21:00) What counts as art? What is art and not art? (27:00) Robert Pattinson we love him (28:15) Cinema: Favorite movies (36:26) War Cinema: What makes it so good (39:53) Saving Private Ryan - no glory (46:30) Top Gun: Maverick (50:50) Art vs. Propaganda (53:55) Art vs. Pornography (1:00:30) Music (1:12:10) Podcast as a form of art: Why did we decide to do this podcast? (1:18:50) Outro + next week

In this episode, Thomas and Kihong talk about modern Zillennial dating and love. Starting out by defining love, they go into depth on different kinds of love, discuss finding love through dating apps, how love is portrayed in modern media, and a lot more. Tune in! If you want to revisit a specific topic: (00:00) - Intro (02:35) - What is love? (10:35) - Parental love: what is so special about it? Or is it? (13:10) - Zillennial romance (18:00) - What does commitment mean in 2023? Is it still there? (23:15) - Has finding love become harder? (31:45) - Self-knowledge (33:10) - Everyone is on a different timeline (35:00) - Sisyphus (37:28) - Dating apps - profiles and commoditization of people (45:10) - Do apps encourage certain gender behaviors? (49:10) - Anonymity: does it exist? (54:25) - First date expectations (1:00:02) - Ghosting… 🙁 (1:05:19) - Media portrayal of love (1:14:25) - Media impact on kids (1:17:50) - Love and timing… our friends are getting married now! (1:22:40) - After this conversation, do you think of love differently now? If so, how? (1:26:55) - What would you tell someone that is struggling with love? Outro…. Disclaimer: Depending on the podcast platform, slight discrepancies in the timestamps may occur.

Years before we started a podcast, we were classmates at boarding school. In this episode, we dive into some questions like: How did you end up at boarding school? What were your first memories there? What was the social scene like? Did it prepare you well for college and for life? Would you send your kids to a boarding school? Content warning: This episode contains discussion of sexual assault in the context of boarding school.

What defines a place? How did you end up where you are? Where do you want to live in the future? What's the difference between physical and virtual places?