Hello Hayes

Hayes makes an announcement about her move, this podcast, and what the future holds. Plus, eight pieces of advice to lead you through your next chapter. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week, I respond to a listener who’s unexpectedly pregnant and struggling with the emotional conflict that comes with her choice of what to do. We talk about timing, being a planner, loneliness, and the complexity of feeling two things at once. This isn’t a debate about abortion — it’s about her feelings. Thanks for listening! CBD Gummies I mentioned: https://go.shopmy.us/p-46648017 [code HELLOHAYES for 15% off] Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

...to his parents. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode, a letter writer is torn between attending her sister’s wedding and staying true to the life she’s chosen. Hayes explores the fear of disappointing family, the grief that follows big personal change, and how to make decisions when every option carries a loss. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today’s episode, a 30‑year‑old listener feels lost in her dream job. Hayes talks about the identity crisis of turning 30, the grief of outgrowing old dreams, and what it really means when your unhealthy patterns come back. Send letters to [email protected]. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Today’s letter asks: How do you break up with a friend when they’re going through something hard? This episode explores the guilt, the timing, and the emotional confusion of stepping back from a friendship that no longer feels healthy. We talk about: ⭐why leaving can feel morally wrong ⭐the difference between compassion and self‑abandonment ⭐when a slow fade helps… and when it doesn’t ⭐how to be honest without being cruel ⭐what it means to let go of a friendship that once mattered Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In the first episode of 2026, a listener writes in after her boyfriend (while blacked out at the bar) called her a name she can’t unhear. Now she’s stuck between the relationship she knows and the truth she’s afraid to look at. We talk about the role alcohol plays in conflict, what it means when someone insists they “didn’t mean it,” and the difference between not lying and not having the language yet. We explore the shame of telling friends the worst thing someone did, the fear of what their reactions might force you to confront, and how to decide whether a rupture is a one‑time mistake or a sign of something deeper. If you’ve ever tried to hold on to the best version of someone while wrestling with the worst thing they’ve said, this episode will meet you right where you are. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

A holiday rerun answering your most-asked Six Besties Theory questions. Can your partner be your best friend? Can you have more than one North Star? How do you know what kind of bestie you are to other people? This episode explores how friendship shifts over time, how to grieve those changes, and how to build a friendship ecosystem that actually supports you. I'll be back with new episodes on Tuesday, Jan 6! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

A holiday rerun from a listener who feels like none of her friendships are truly reciprocal — and wonders what that pattern might be trying to tell her. I'll be back with new episodes on Tuesday, Jan 6! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Revisiting a listener favorite while we take a break for the holidays <3 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The letter writer wasn't invited on her best friend's birthday trip. Then she got the last-minute invite. Will going on the trip save the friendship? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

"Am I missing something special?" Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Where a letter writer questions her resistance to moving back to the city she's from. + updates on my personal moving journey. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

"...and I never seem to say the right thing in response." Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

"I am stuck with my own mistake and I'm afraid my relationship is tainted forever by my own flaws. How do I forgive myself?" Send your letter to [email protected] Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this week's Hello Hayes, a letter writer is scared to tell her parents about her recent break-up with a partner of seven years. They were "attached" to him and were proud of her for being in such a "happy" and "successful" relationship. Let's advice! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On friendship after college, getting engaged, and what to do when you receive dismissive advice from well-intentioned people. Hello Hayes! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week we're talking about how to deal with triggering questions, understanding our feelings about having kids, whether some topics are "too personal" to discuss with friends, and more. Send advice letters to [email protected] Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

(plus the final part of our creative process q&a) Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week's Hello Hayes asks: "Is it ever okay to pick love over career?" Let's discuss. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week's Hello Hayes advice column: Our letter writer, a chronic overthinker, is "freaked out" about getting engaged because her boyfriend isn't as family oriented as she is. (Or is he?) We discuss: family dynamics and being "family oriented," getting engaged, relationship standards, and whether there's validity to the "80/20" rule. In the back half, we're getting a pulse check on generative AI. What are your feelings? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What to do when your friends feel like emotional strangers. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What’s the right thing to do when you’ve kept the peace with someone your whole life… but now you don’t want them at your wedding? That’s the dilemma in this week’s Hello Hayes advice column. Let’s hear it. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Let’s talk about reciprocity in friendship. In this episode, I answer a letter from someone who’s tired of always being the one to initiate. Then, in the second half, I dive into your rapid-fire questions — everything from how to support a friend who keeps making “disastrous” decisions to what to do when your friends just don’t seem to understand you. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Want advice? Send letters to [email protected] Her friends say she’s too young to get married — but she’s never felt more ready. This week on Hello Hayes, we unpack what to do when the people closest to you don’t support your biggest life decision yet. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Let's say you want to build a new life for yourself: make money, have great friends, get to travel…and you're on your way! But what happens when you suddenly look around and realize that no one can relate to what you've been through or where you come from? Are those relationships doomed? Was it crazy to ever think you could be different from where you come from? In today's Hello Hayes, we're hearing from a 20-year-old college student who feels like the poor friend in every room — and is wondering if she'll ever feel fully seen and understood in her relationships. Topics covered: friendship advice, class differences, financial stress, college relationships, feeling misunderstood, building authentic connections Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

How much should you sacrifice for someone who won’t do the same for you?That’s the question behind this week's Hello Hayes letter , written by someone who has given everything to her relationship and is starting to wonder if it’s being returned. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Is it betrayal when your best friend stays friends with someone who hurt you? Let's discuss... Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Thank you all for submitting such great questions on the creative process and writing. This is part 1 of my 4 part Q+A series! In today's episode, we're tackling HOW TO GET STARTED. We’re gonna talk about finding a spark, idea generation, we’re gonna talk about recognizing yourself as an artist or writer and giving yourself permission to be that person, and then we’re gonna talk about being seen by others. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Today we're talking about discipline: how to get it and how to stop hating ourselves for not having it. This episode is for you if: You feel like your lack of discipline is the reason you haven’t reached your potential. You have something you desperately want to do, but can’t seem to stick with it. You wonder why discipline seems so easy for other people — and so hard for you. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Today we’re talking about the healing power of books — specifically 9 books (fiction and non-fiction) that have helped me heal over the past year. The first half of this episode is a rapid-fire review of eight of my favorites, and in the second half, I do a deep dive on the book I’m currently reading: THE MYTH OF NORMAL by Dr. Gabor Maté. If you’re feeling stuck, burned out, or ready to grow emotionally, these books can support your healing journey and offer clarity, comfort, and new perspectives. For more book recommendations and resources to support your healing, check out the Live Beyond Booklist:https://livebeyondca.org/booklist/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Everyone wants (and) deserves an inner circle full of people they trust, but sometimes we get in our way own while searching for them. In this episode, we're talking about the three main ways we sabotage building our inner circle, how we can begin to properly build our inner circle brick by brick, and at the end, I'm answering an advice submission from someone who feels like everyone else has tight knit friends except for them. Enjoy! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Flaky friendships are tricky. Sometimes it’s about priorities, sometimes it’s burnout, and sometimes… it’s just poor communication. In this rapid-fire Q+A, I’m answering your questions about what it really means when friends flake — and how to tell the difference between a friendship worth saving and one that’s run its course. Thank you to everyone who submitted on Instagram! (https://www.instagram.com/afhayes) This episode was actually recorded six months ago as a bonus I never released (I'm sorry), but it’s still relevant today. Whether you’re hurt by a friend who keeps canceling or you’re the one who flakes and feels guilty about it, there’s something here for you. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Soooo, my husband bribed me to run a 10K for diamond earrings. That's SIX POINT FOUR MILES! But this episode isn’t really about running. It’s about love, discomfort, and doing things you’re not good at…on purpose. In this episode of Hello Hayes, we talk about why I said yes to something I hate, what it means to show interest in your partner’s world, and why it's worth stepping outside your comfort zone. Whether you're a runner or not, this one’s for anyone who’s ever avoided something just because they might fail. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode of Hello Hayes, I'm unpacking one of the most common — and surprisingly complicated — questions I get when I tell people I moved across the country: "Have you made a lot of friends?" I share why that question trips me up, how my answer has evolved after moving to a new city, and why focusing on the amount of friendships might not be the most helpful way to think about building your life. Whether you're trying to make new friends, feeling stuck socially, or rethinking what friendship even means, this episode is for you. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode, I tell you all about why Brian and I decided to adopt a dog and give you an honest recap of what the first week has been like. We dive into the wonderful parts...and the parts that are truly scaring the shit out of me. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices