Mr Morton's Barmy Book of Bonkers Bits: Funny Bedtime Stories for Kids

Granny Wars: a hilarious kids storytelling podcast episode about family, rivalry, and the most dangerous question a baby can askWhen a new baby is on the way, everybody has questions. Is it a boy or a girl? What will you call it? Will anyone sleep ever again? These are the ordinary ones. The ones everybody thinks about.But there is another question. A much more dangerous one.What will the grandparents be called?Sophie's two grandmothers-to-be get on brilliantly. They go for coffee together. They swap recipes. They once spent an entire Saturday choosing curtains and came back even more cheerful than when they left. So when the baby news arrives, everyone is delighted. Hugging. Crying. Cheering. And then, at exactly the same moment, both women say: I shall be Granny.And that is where the trouble starts.What follows is one of the funniest fun kids stories about family rivalry ever told. There are WhatsApp battles with increasingly unhinged display names. There are branded baby gifts, towering competition cakes, and lullabies that escalate from a gentle hum to a full choir with a man called Dennis who looks absolutely terrified. There are campaign leaflets, tote bags, rosettes, and an actual debate staged in the sitting room with a folded ironing board as the podium. And then, somehow, things get considerably more serious than that.This funny bedtime story for kids is perfect for audio stories for children who love family chaos, for parents who will recognise every single moment, and for anyone who has ever watched two people compete over something with absolute dedication and zero self-awareness. Children will love the escalating absurdity. Grandparents will feel personally seen. Parents will feel exhausted just listening.Episode length: approximately 14 minutesAges: 4 to 400Best enjoyed: bedtime, car journeys, family gatherings where this sort of thing has happenedPress play. The grandmothers have just said Granny at exactly the same time. Dad has just taken a very big breath. This is going to take a while.More stories at MrMortonsBarmyBook.com.

Three Billy Goats Buff: a hilarious kids storytelling podcast episode about trolls, vanity, and catastrophic protein shakesEveryone knows the story of the Three Billy Goats Gruff. Three goats. One bridge. One troll. A lot of trip-trapping. The goats won. The troll lost. Everyone went home.But that was then.Because once you have defeated a troll under a bridge in a dramatic and very public way, people remember. Word spreads. And the Three Billy Goats Gruff decide that Gruff, while solid, while heroic, while undeniably a serious word, is simply not enough anymore. What they need is to become something bigger. Something bolder. Something impossible to scroll past.What they need is to become Buff.What follows is one of the funniest fun kids stories about vanity, social media, and the particular madness of trying to impress someone who will never be impressed. There are protein shakes made from things that should never be combined. There are muscles appearing in the wrong places. There are internet trolls doing what internet trolls do. And there is a chicken who ends the whole thing in a way that nobody sees coming.This funny bedtime story for kids is perfect for audio stories for children who love fairy tales twisted sideways, for families who enjoy clever comedy with something quietly true underneath, and for anyone who has ever tried too hard to look impressive and made everything considerably worse. Children will love the escalating absurdity and the deeply satisfying ending. Parents will recognise everything the goats are doing and feel personally called out.Episode length: approximately 13 minutesAges: 4 to 400Best enjoyed: bedtime, car journeys, after school wind downPress play. The Three Billy Goats Buff are live under the bridge and taking questions. The chicken has just arrived. Nothing will ever be the same.More stories at MrMortonsBarmyBook.com.

The Pencil That Drew Tomorrow: a funny kids storytelling podcast about a magic pencil and catastrophically bad decisionsOliver Pike has forgotten his pencil again. This is not unusual. Oliver forgets quite a lot of things. PE socks. Reading books. His coat on a day when it is snowing sideways. But pencils are the main one. So when Mr Spindle hands him the last spare from his drawer, a battered, tooth-marked, slightly bent thing that has clearly survived several arguments, Oliver does what any irritated ten-year-old might do. He draws something in the margin of his maths book that he probably should not have drawn.The next morning, Mr Spindle arrives at school looking noticeably different.What follows is one of the funniest fun kids stories about wish fulfilment gone spectacularly wrong. Oliver discovers that whatever he draws becomes real the next day. He starts sensibly. Then he starts thinking bigger. Then he stops thinking altogether. And by the end of the week he is being called Britain's youngest entrepreneur by adults who have never met him, his face is on a billboard over the bypass, and someone wants to know whether he would prefer Tokyo, New York, or Dubai for the launch.This funny bedtime story for kids is perfect for audio stories for children who love magic with consequences, for families who enjoy clever comedy that builds to glorious chaos, and for anyone who has ever wanted something badly and then discovered wanting it was the best part. Children will love the escalating mayhem and the deeply satisfying ending. Parents will recognise the particular horror of getting exactly what you wished for.Episode length: approximately 14 minutesAges: 4 to 400Best enjoyed: bedtime, car journeys, after school wind downPress play. Oliver has just picked up the pencil. He has absolutely no idea what he is about to draw. Neither does Mr Spindle. Although Mr Spindle is about to find out.More stories at MrMortonsBarmyBook.com.

The Boy Who Sneezed Through Time: a funny kids storytelling podcast about hayfever, headteachers, and accidental time travelMilo Crumb hates spring. While everyone else goes misty-eyed about fresh air and new beginnings, Milo goes misty-eyed for a completely different reason. Spring puts yellow dust on everything. Spring makes his nose feel as if someone has tickled it from the inside with a feather dipped in pepper. And this spring is the worst yet.The problem is Mr Grindle. The headteacher has one rule above all others. More important than no running. More important than no chewing gum. More important than the mysterious and never-explained ban on satsumas. No noise in the corridors. And Milo is standing right beside him with a sneeze that has been gathering itself all morning and has now decided it is in charge.What happens next takes Milo somewhere he absolutely did not expect to go. Several somewheres, in fact. Each one stranger than the last. Each one containing a version of Mr Grindle that is somehow both familiar and deeply wrong. This funny bedtime story for kids is perfect for audio stories for children who love time travel, ridiculous authority figures, and the deeply satisfying idea that a sneeze might be the most powerful force in the universe. Children will love the chaotic leaps through time. Parents will recognise the particular dread of trying very hard not to make a noise at exactly the wrong moment. Everyone will enjoy the ending, which arrives with the help of a new headteacher, a jar of menthols, and a school that finally learns to breathe.Episode length: approximately 15 minutesAges: 4 to 400Best enjoyed: bedtime, car journeys, hayfever seasonPress play. Join Milo and his catastrophic hayfever in a kids storytelling podcast that is funny, surprising, and unexpectedly moving for a story about sneezing.More stories at MrMortonsBarmyBook.com.

The Wafer Bones: a funny kids storytelling podcast about biscuit skeletons and snack crimesBea Hart has a system. She eats the chocolate off KitKats and discards the wafer inside. Not in the bin. Not on a plate. She drops the naked wafer fingers wherever she happens to be. Behind the sofa. Under the coffee table. Once, disastrously, into a shoe.Her brother Max, who takes biscuits very seriously, is horrified. The wafer is the whole point, he says. But Bea disagrees. The wafer tastes like chewing a very thin bit of ceiling.Then one night, after Bea eats the last KitKat in the house without asking, she hears a sound from the hallway. Crunch. Click. Click-click. Something is being assembled. One piece at a time. Slowly. Carefully. At the top of the stairs stands a small skeleton made entirely of wafer bones. Her wafer bones. It lifts one arm and points straight at her.This funny bedtime story for kids is perfect for audio stories for children who love a bit of gentle spookiness, sibling rivalry, and the particular horror of biscuit crimes coming back to haunt you. Children will love the creepy wafer skeleton and the twist about Max's involvement. Parents will recognize the passionate biscuit debates that happen in every household. Everyone will grin at the ending that suggests maybe Max was not working alone.Episode length: approximately 11 minutesAges: 4 to 400Best enjoyed: bedtime, car journeys, biscuit negotiationsPress play. Join Bea and the wafer skeleton in a kids podcast episode that is funny, slightly spooky, and perfect for families who argue about the correct way to eat a KitKat.More stories at MrMortonsBarmyBook.com.

Operation Sprout: a hilarious kids storytelling podcast episode about one epic kitchen showdownEight-year-old Maisie Muddleby has never eaten a Brussels sprout—and she has absolutely no intention of starting. Not even if it tap-dances, sings, or wears a tiny crown.But one evening, a very green, slightly smug sprout appears on her plate. And Dad, armed with a notepad and mysterious “official” forms, begins behaving in ways that are… suspiciously serious. Strange whispers, invisible teams, and escalating kitchen chaos follow as Maisie faces her biggest challenge yet.This funny children’s audio story is perfect for a kids podcast, bedtime stories, car journeys, or any time you want absurd humour, suspenseful fun, and heartwarming family antics. Children will love the playful nonsense, parents will recognise the delightfully ridiculous stakes, and everyone will grin at Dad’s unwavering commitment to the mission. Episode length: ~15 minutes Ages: 4–400 Best enjoyed: bedtime, car journeys, dinner-table negotiationsPress play. Join Maisie, the sprout, and Dad’s imaginary spy team in a kids storytelling podcast that’s ridiculous, warm, and surprisingly suspenseful. More stories at MrMortonsBarmyBook.com.

The Accidental Axolotl – a kids storytelling podcast adventureMeet Axel, a well-meaning axolotl with a knack for chaos. When Tilly Mudge steps away, Axel decides to tidy his tank. What could possibly go wrong? Everything.Thermometers topple. Castles collapse. Gravel streams across the tank like a tiny underwater avalanche. Pip and Pop, the ever-suspicious shrimp, react with panic. Colin the snail offers his slow, measured advice. And Axel? Well, Axel tries his very best, which somehow makes everything worse. A heater swings, flakes fly, and a thermometer ends up stuck to his gill like a medal for very bad behaviour.Through bubbling clouds, frantic fixes, and underwater mishaps, Axel proves that even when disaster strikes, persistence, courage, and a little bit of chaos can make life… delightfully unpredictable. Kids and grown-ups alike will laugh, gasp, and cheer in this nine-minute story of mess, mayhem, and underwater heroics. Episode length: ~9 minutes Ages: 4–400 Best enjoyed: bedtime, car journeys, or quiet moments in the chaos of everyday lifePress play and dive into Axel's tank, where shrimp argue, snails judge, and one axolotl accidentally creates a masterpiece of mess, mischief, and laughter.Discover more wonderfully bonkers stories at MrMortonsBarmyBook.com.

The Koala Who Couldn't Cling – a kids storytelling podcast adventureKevin Koala is a perfectly normal koala in every way—except for one thing. He simply cannot cling. Trees, fence posts, signs, even Ranger Bev's leg—everything slips from his grasp. No matter how hard he tries, Kevin just slides, and everyone around him can't help but watch with laughter and disbelief.But when a little sugar, peppermint, and fizzy mint lemonade enter the picture, Kevin's world changes. Suddenly, the slippery koala is blasting off, bouncing through the treetops, sticky, sparkling, and absolutely triumphant. It's a story of persistence, chaos, and discovery, told with humour, absurdity, and heart.This funny children’s audio story is perfect for kids storytelling podcasts, bedtime stories, family listening, or car journeys. Filled with sticky situations, fizzy burps, mischievous sugar gliders, and plenty of laughter, it shows that sometimes all you need is a little creativity—and maybe a lot of sugar—to find your footing. Episode length: ~13 minutes Ages: 4–400 Best enjoyed: bedtime, car journeys, family chaos sessionsPress play and join Kevin, Kylie Kookaburra, Wally Wombat, and a sticky, syrupy, sugar-fuelled koala in a kids storytelling podcast packed with laughter, chaos, and pure delight.Discover more hilariously bonkers stories at MrMortonsBarmyBook.com.

Luna has started noticing the change jar getting lower. Not quickly. Not all at once. Just slowly, like a puddle shrinking in the sun. Coins come out for bus fare. School things. Plasters. Shampoo. And the jar keeps getting emptier. She tries not to count. But she notices.One evening, while Dad is making cheese on toast, Luna asks the question that makes the whole kitchen go quiet. What if you keep having to use the jar because of me?Dad stops grating at once. He puts the grater down very carefully. Then he says something unexpected. Oh dear. You have upset the change.What follows is one of the gentlest, most magical fun kids stories about worry, money, and the way a good parent can turn anxiety into wonder. Dad lifts down the jar, holds it to his ear like a seashell, and listens. Really listens. Then he announces that the coins are complaining. About being kept still. Because change is called change because it likes to change.He tips the jar onto a tea towel and begins to listen to what each coin wants to become. This funny bedtime story turns into something deeper as Dad explains what happens to treasure that never becomes anything. Pirates burying gold that never turns into bus fare or books or biscuits. Dragons sitting on mountains of coins in gloomy caves getting grumpy. Wishing well pennies waiting at the bottom, soggy and cold, for wishes that never come true.But coins that go out and become things? Those are happy. And the happiest change of all is the change that gets to look after somebody it loves.This kids storytelling podcast episode is for children who worry about money without knowing how to say it. For parents navigating tight budgets whilst keeping their children feeling safe. For families who need bedtime stories for children that handle difficult things gently. The relationship between Luna and her dad is beautifully drawn, full of warmth and the particular magic that happens when a parent protects a child from worry by making scarcity feel like purpose.Perfect for calming bedtime story time when you want something that settles softly, for family listening during quiet car journeys, or for audio stories for children that trust kids to understand difficult things wrapped in kindness. This bedtime story podcast episode is funny and magical and deeply, quietly comforting.More fun children's stories with heart at MrMortonsBarmyBook.com.Episode length: approximately 11 minutesAges: 4 to 400 (though older kids will feel the deeper currents)Best enjoyed: bedtime, quiet moments, when someone needs gentle reassurancePress play. The change jar is getting lower. Luna is starting to notice. And Dad is about to turn worry into wonder.

Mum's Marathon – a hilarious kids storytelling podcast adventureIn this uproarious kids podcast episode, Mum has signed up for a marathon—but she simply can’t run past anything that needs fixing. Not wouldn’t. Couldn’t. Her legs refuse to keep going if someone, somewhere, might need help.From rescuing cats stuck in trees to herding rebellious chickens, fixing fences, delivering packages, and even dodging runaway gnomes, Mum’s “training” turns into a spectacular parade of chaos, animals, and good intentions. No obstacle is too small, no animal too stubborn, and no neighbour too helpless for her helpful streak.This funny children’s audio story is perfect for a kids storytelling podcast, bedtime stories, car journeys, or family listening. It combines absurd humour, escalating suspense, and warm-hearted chaos, showing that sometimes you just can’t fight your nature—even at the finish line. Episode length: ~9 minutes Ages: 4–400 Best enjoyed: bedtime, car journeys, chaotic family morningsPress play and join Mum, Gerald the cat, a flock of rebellious chickens, and a very determined goose for a kids storytelling podcast packed with chaos, courage, and unstoppable hilarity.Find more absurdly fun and heartwarming stories at MrMortonsBarmyBook.com.

Alfie finds a magic lamp behind the skate ramp at the rec. It is dented, dull, and smells faintly of old socks and disappointment. Out pops a blue genie who speaks only in rhyme and offers three wishes. This should be brilliant. This should be the best day ever.Then Ben starts asking questions.What currency? Which bank? Old pounds or new pounds? Cash or transfer? What about fraud detection? What about inflation? Every answer creates ten more questions. The wish collapses under its own logic before it even begins.This funny bedtime story for kids spirals through increasingly desperate wishes. World peace. Best at football. Fame. Happiness. No weapons. Climate change fixed. King of the world. The perfect wish. Ben finds problems with every single one. Consequences. Loopholes. Unintended disasters. Alfie cannot fix them fast enough. The genie watches sadly as three hundred years of experience tells him exactly how this ends.What follows is one of the cleverest fun kids stories about overthinking, fear of consequences, and what happens when you try to control everything. Children who love logical puzzles will recognize themselves in Ben. Kids who just want things to work will feel Alfie's mounting frustration. And the genie's bittersweet ending lands somewhere unexpectedly moving for a story about magical wishes gone wrong.This kids storytelling podcast episode is for families who appreciate wit alongside warmth. For children who like their bedtime stories for children to be clever without showing off. For parents who want audio stories that spark conversation about choices and consequences without feeling like homework. The genie speaks only in rhyme throughout, which is a particular delight, and his final monologue alone in the darkness is genuinely poignant.Perfect for car journeys when older kids need something that rewards attention, for bedtime story podcast listening when you want something thoughtful, or for family listening that makes everyone think while they smile. This is fun children's stories with philosophical depth hidden inside the comedy. A calming bedtime story that builds chaos then lands somewhere quietly sad and true.More stories at MrMortonsBarmyBook.com.Episode length: approximately 21 minutesAges: 4 to 400 (though older kids will catch more of the logic spirals)Best enjoyed: bedtime, car journeys, moments when you want to think and laughPress play. Alfie has just rubbed the lamp. The genie has just appeared. Ben has just opened his mouth. Nothing will ever be the same.

The Boy Who Couldn't Stop Hiccupping – a kids storytelling podcast adventureOliver Pemberton's hiccups aren’t just hiccups, they are full-on, ceiling-scraping, gravity-defying launches that turn his life into a bouncing, chaotic spectacle. From flying toast to collapsing bookshelves, even the cat cannot escape the mayhem. Nothing and no one can stop him. That is, until Maestro Magnifico realises Oliver's hiccups are musical perfection in B flat.Join Oliver as his involuntary percussive antics transform the school talent show into a full-blown symphony of laughter, chaos and unexpected brilliance. Hiccups, piano crashes, xylophones and a bit of accidental jazz combine in an 18-minute story that proves sometimes your quirks are your superpowers. Episode length: approximately 18 minutes Ages: 5 to 500 Best enjoyed: breakfast chaos, afternoon laughter or any moment that could use a bouncing boy in B flatPress play and discover how hiccups can make music, mayhem and memories in this hilariously chaotic kids storytelling podcast.Explore more barmy adventures at MrMortonsBarmyBook.com.

The Sleeping Beauty Who Wouldn't Wake Up – a kids storytelling podcast adventurePrincess Petunia has been perfectly fake-snoring for three whole months, and life in the castle is… delightfully inconvenient. From princes with cymbals, bagpipes, and chickens, to interpretive dances and questionable tickling attempts, every effort to wake her has spectacularly failed.Enter Prince Humphrey, who does the unthinkable: he climbs into her bed and falls asleep. Chaos ensues. Snoring shakes chandeliers, pillows fly, marbles roll, and Petunia discovers that sometimes, waking a prince isn’t about magic—it’s about managing utter absurdity. Through explosions of feathers, mechanical awakening machines, and kingdom-wide mischief, Petunia realises being awake can be infinitely more entertaining than being cursed.Kids and grown-ups alike will laugh, gasp, and cheer through this 16-minute story of royal misadventures, chaotic ingenuity, and a princess who refuses to be ordinary. Episode length: ~16 minutes Ages: 5–500 Best enjoyed: bedtime, rainy afternoons, or any moment craving chaotic hilarityPress play and join Princess Petunia, Prince Humphrey, a castle full of mischief, and a very clever cat in a kids storytelling podcast full of snoring, chaos, and laughter.Discover more bonkers tales at MrMortonsBarmyBook.com.

Mr Morton's Barmy Book of Bonkers Bits: The Second Hand Shop Next DoorNext door to Mr Morton's bookshop was a shop that confused everyone. It did not sell lamps or chairs or pre loved trousers. It sold seconds. Tickable, gleaming, magical seconds that could stretch a moment, save a lost opportunity, or let Lily, a girl who was always late, say the words she meant properly.Lily discovers the power of seconds, using them to tie shoelaces, finish homework and savour her favourite bits of books. But when too many seconds are used at once, time behaves strangely and Lily must learn that the best moments are the ones that make time irrelevant. Sometimes the best thing you can do is just be in it, not try to control it.Runtime: Approximately 14 minutesTheme: Time, patience and learning to savour the momentJoin Shaun Morton for a whimsical and warm tale of magic, chaos and discovering that sometimes the best seconds are the ones you do not try to hold onto. Listen now and lose yourself in the story.Discover more wonderfully bonkers stories at MrMortonsBarmyBook.com.

Mr Morton's Barmy Book of Bonkers Bits: The Thing That Became NothingTommy’s dad wanted them to have a thing. A proper father and son thing. The only problem was that every hobby Tommy tried, football, skateboarding, guitar, chess, birdwatching, origami, was quickly taken over by Dad’s enthusiasm, expertise and far too much equipment. Soon nothing Tommy liked was left untouched.Then came an idea. If Dad ruined everything Tommy liked, maybe Tommy could like what Dad liked. What followed was the Great Interest War. Whiteboards, corkboards, timelines, PowerPoints about PowerPoints and a feedback loop of love and lunacy transformed the house into a labyrinth of obsession.Finally, utterly exhausted, they collapsed together on the sofa. No projects. No expertise. No need to explain anything. Just together. Every Saturday. Sofa. Rubbish telly. Nothing. Just them.Runtime: Approximately 12 minutesTheme: Being together matters more than doing things togetherJoin Shaun Morton for this warm, whimsical story of family, chaos and finding the joy in doing nothing together. Listen now and see how sometimes the simplest thing can be the most important thing.Discover more wonderfully bonkers stories at MrMortonsBarmyBook.com.

Mr Morton's Barmy Book of Bonkers Bits: The Bicycles That Wouldn't WorkWhen Joe and Sam save up for the perfect bicycle, nothing goes to plan. Rain, broken tyres, and a tea shop with impossible biscuits turn an ordinary day into a delightfully absurd adventure. With quick thinking, a bit of luck, and a biscuit acting as a wheel, the boys discover that ingenuity and friendship can turn disaster into triumph.Runtime: Approximately 9 minutesTheme: Adventure, problem solving and seeing the extraordinary in the ordinaryJoin Shaun Morton for a playful, whimsical story full of clever twists, ridiculous solutions and plenty of laughs. Listen now and enjoy a tale where biscuits become heroes and creativity saves the day.Discover more wonderfully bonkers stories at MrMortonsBarmyBook.com.

Mr Morton's Barmy Book of Bonkers Bits: The Wolf Who Couldn't Help HimselfWinston Wolf is Wibbleton Way’s fiercest food critic. One sniff or bite from him and a restaurant is doomed. When three new pig-run eateries open simultaneously, chaos erupts, kitchens catch fire, and recipes go spectacularly wrong. But Winston cannot resist helping, sneaking in at night to save the food while the pigs remain blissfully clueless.Runtime: Approximately 18 minutesTheme: Comedy, culinary disaster, clever problem solvingJoin Shaun Morton for a theatrical, laugh-out-loud tale of absurdity, chaos, and heroic cooking. A story where pigs are convinced they are geniuses, the wolf is quietly brilliant, and disasters turn deliciously entertaining.Discover more wonderfully bonkers stories at MrMortonsBarmyBook.com.

Penelope Puddleworth's Perfect Problem: a hilariously bonkers kids storytelling episode Penelope Puddleworth wakes up eight feet tall and absolutely perfect—and quickly discovers that being giant is not all it’s cracked up to be. The bigger she is, the harder it is to get through doorways, play games, or keep her head out of the ceiling. And when she starts telling the truth about everyone’s mistakes, she shrinks—fast. From playground mishaps to magical shrinking and growing, Penelope learns the very important lesson that being perfectly giant, or tiny, is far less fun than being ordinary. Only by genuinely noticing the good in others does she find the perfect height for friends, fun, and surviving Year Six. Episode length: ~13 minutes Ages: 4–400 Best enjoyed: bedtime, car journeys, or any time you want absurd humour and magical chaos Press play. Join Penelope as she towers over—and then shrinks beneath—her classmates, discovering that the best adventures happen when you’re exactly where the fun is. Ridiculous, warm, and delightfully bonkers. More outrageous tales at MrMortonsBarmyBook.com.

Wendy Wobblewand and the Bonkers Brew: a delightfully chaotic kids storytelling episode In a wonky kitchen at the end of Wobble Street, Wendy Wobblewand brews potions her own way: messy, magical, and utterly bonkers. When a curious neighbour sneaks in to help, they accidentally create a Bonkerfluff—a sparkly, seventeen-legged creature that brings chaos, joy, and a lot of very confused dancing teapots. From bouncing buttons to singing teapots, a teabag that glows in the dark, and the most unpredictable kitchen in the neighbourhood, Wendy discovers that the best potions happen when you ignore the rules and embrace the magic of fun. Expect outrageous humour, magical mayhem, and heartwarming surprises for everyone who loves a bit of chaos with their storytelling. Episode length: ~11 minutes Ages: 4–400 Best enjoyed: bedtime, car journeys, or anytime you want ridiculous, magical fun Press play. Join Wendy, Timothy, and the Bonkerfluffs in a kids storytelling podcast full of chaos, laughter, and magic that goes absolutely everywhere. Ridiculous, warm, and wonderfully barmy. More outrageous tales at MrMortonsBarmyBook.com.

Mrs Puddifoot does not care for New Year's Eve. It is cold, loud, and full of people shouting at the sky as if the sky has done something personal. Mrs Puddifoot would much rather stay indoors with a kettle, a biscuit, and a firm commitment to letting the year change without her involvement.Unfortunately, the next year has other plans.Because a polite stranger appears on her doorstep and claims, in the calm voice of someone asking for directions, that he is early for the new year. Not early for a party. Early for the year itself. He apologises for the inconvenience and asks if he might wait on the doorstep until midnight when he can officially begin.Mrs Puddifoot stares at him. The stranger smiles pleasantly and produces a thermos of tea.And then, as if this is perfectly normal, more people begin to arrive. Quiet people. Cheerful people. Determined people. All forming a queue that starts at Mrs Puddifoot's front door and stretches through the town, up the hill, and steadily towards midnight. They are queuing for the new year like it is a bus service or a bakery opening.Mrs Puddifoot does not want a queue. Mrs Puddifoot does not want visitors. Mrs Puddifoot definitely does not want to be responsible for organising the next year like it is a community event she accidentally volunteered to host.So she does the only sensible thing. She tries to ignore it. She closes the curtains. She makes herself tea. She sits in her armchair with a book and pretends nothing unusual is happening outside.This becomes increasingly difficult when the queue begins to develop its own mood, its own rules, and its own gentle stubbornness. There are murmured resolutions. There is the peculiar comfort of standing near strangers who are all waiting for the same moment. There is hope mixed with nervousness, all wrapped up in a line of people who have decided that this year, they are not going to let it just happen to them.Eventually, Mrs Puddifoot opens the door. Not because she wants to join in. But because ignoring something does not make it go away, and sometimes the thing you are avoiding is actually the thing you need. What follows is a gentle, bonkers journey through conversations with people waiting for change, hoping for better, and queuing politely because that is what you do when something important is about to begin.This is a cosy bedtime story that is funny in a quiet way, magical in a slightly odd way, and warm in the way tired parents need. Children will enjoy the absurd idea of queuing for a year, the odd characters who appear, and the soft sense of something special unfolding. Grown ups will recognise the feeling underneath. That worry about missing your moment. That hope that maybe this time you will join in instead of watching from the doorway.Perfect for family listening on winter evenings, for after school wind down, or at bedtime when you want audio stories for children that settle gently. If you are searching for funny bedtime stories for kids with warmth, a kids storytelling podcast that feels thoughtful, and wholesome humour that lands soft, this queue is waiting.Mr Morton's Barmy Book of Bonkers Bits is wholesome family storytelling with a bonkers twist. Performance driven, kind hearted, and never mean.Episode length: approximately 12 minutesAges: 4 to 400Best enjoyed: bedtime, car journeys, after school wind downIf this made your family smile, a quick rating helps other stories for tired parents find their way to it too.

The Bauble Who Saved My Christmas ✨🎁Once upon a Christmas Eve, a grumpy bookshop keeper meets a box of tangled fairy lights, and a very mischievous magical bauble decides it has had enough of being treated like a decoration. It wants to be important. It wants to be in charge. It wants to cause a tiny bit of festive trouble, in the most cheerful way possible.The bookshop keeper is not interested in festive trouble. He is interested in quiet. Order. Proper shelves arranged by author and genre. Calm customers who know what they want and leave promptly. He has survived enough Decembers to know that Christmas cheer is lovely as long as it stays several streets away from his shop. His window display is minimal. His decorations are non existent. His commitment to ignoring the season is impressively stubborn.But then the bauble arrives. Delivered in a box. Rolling across the floor with intention. And it is not just shiny. It is persuasive. It twinkles like it has a plan. It makes suggestions that sound entirely reasonable until you think about them properly. It rolls into the wrong places on purpose, positioning itself exactly where it cannot be ignored.At first, the bookshop keeper tries to put it away. Then he tries to return it. Then he tries to pretend it does not exist. None of these strategies work because the bauble has decided this bookshop needs Christmas whether it wants it or not.The bauble starts small. A wish here. A little sparkle there. A reluctant nod to the season. But Christmas Eve has a habit of escalating, and this bauble has the sort of personality that turns a small wish into a whirlwind. The fairy lights tangle themselves with clear intention, wrapping around shelves in patterns that look almost deliberate. The bookshop begins to feel less like a serious place of literature and more like a story that is writing itself. Books start appearing in unexpected places with oddly relevant titles. Customers arrive looking for things they did not know they needed.And the grumpy keeper discovers something surprising. It is surprisingly hard to stay frosty when the world keeps offering you a chance to soften, especially when a magical bauble is orchestrating the whole thing with the determination of a tiny festive director who refuses to take no for an answer.This episode is a festive audio story for children who love Christmas magic, silly surprises, and stories where objects behave as if they have feelings and opinions. It is also for grown ups who want wholesome humour that does not shout, and a funny kids podcast episode that still lands warm and cosy. The laughter is gentle, the chaos is kind, and the ending settles softly into something that feels like a hug, which makes it a lovely choice for bedtime in December.Perfect for family listening while wrapping presents and trying not to get tape stuck everywhere, driving home in the dark with Christmas lights blinking outside the windows, or curling up together when everyone needs a calming bedtime story that still feels fun and festive. If you are looking for a kids storytelling podcast that captures Christmas warmth without being saccharine, and funny bedtime stories for kids that make tired parents smile too, this mischievous bauble is exactly what December ordered.Mr Morton's Barmy Book of Bonkers Bits is wholesome family storytelling with a bonkers twist. Performance driven, kind hearted, and never mean.Episode length: approximately 10 minutesAges: 4 to 400Best enjoyed: bedtime, car journeys, after school wind downFollow the show for more funny bedtime stories for kids that make Christmas feel a little bit kinder and a lot more silly.

You already know the opening line. You already know the hush it creates when it is spoken softly, in a darkened room, with the day finally done. This is the classic Christmas poem told the way it is meant to be told. Warmly. Clearly. With space to breathe and settle.On a quiet Christmas Eve, the house finally stills. The last rustle of wrapping paper fades into silence. The final sip of water is taken. The excitement of the day begins to soften into something calmer. And then the story begins. Stockings hung by the chimney with care. The clatter on the lawn. Reindeer on the roof. That particular kind of Christmas magic that only exists when everyone agrees to be still for a moment and let the words paint the picture.This is not a new version. This is not a twist. This is the poem you remember, performed with theatrical warmth and gentle pacing, so every familiar line lands exactly as it should. No interruptions. No additions. Just the rhythm, the wonder, and the cosy certainty of knowing what comes next.This episode is a short, comforting listen for families who love bedtime traditions, classic Christmas storytelling, and a calm festive moment that does not wind children up before sleep. It is perfect when you want something familiar and soothing, whether that is at bedtime on Christmas Eve itself, during a late evening car journey home through twinkling lights, or as a little pause in the middle of busy December when everyone needs to slow down and breathe.Children will enjoy the rhythm, the pictures it paints in their minds, and the cosy certainty of a story that has been shared for generations. Grown ups will enjoy the sense of slowing down, the warmth of tradition, and the gentle feeling it leaves behind. No chaos. No surprises. Just comfort.If you are looking for a calming bedtime story at Christmas, or a bedtime story podcast moment you can play as part of your Christmas Eve routine year after year, this is a lovely little piece of audio comfort that does exactly what it promises. Soft, steady, and safe for the most excited night of the year.Perfect for family listening when you need everyone to settle, when bedtime feels impossible because of Christmas morning anticipation, or when you want a kids storytelling podcast episode that wraps the day up gently and helps tired parents guide everyone towards sleep.Mr Morton's Barmy Book of Bonkers Bits is wholesome family storytelling with a bonkers twist. Performance driven, kind hearted, and never mean.Episode length: approximately 3 minutesAges: 4 to 400Best enjoyed: bedtime, car journeys, after school wind downIf your family enjoyed this, share it with someone who loves a cosy Christmas bedtime tradition.

Christmas Eve is meant to be a smooth little sleigh ride into bedtime. Calm, organised, magical. But what if the elves decide they have had enough and go on strike right when everyone is counting on them.Up at the North Pole, the workshop is in absolute uproar. The elves are holding emergency meetings with agendas and suspiciously official paperwork. Someone is waving a banner that reads "Fair Treatment for Festive Workers" in glitter. Someone else is shouting about overtime and the unreasonable expectation that they should work through Christmas when everyone else gets the day off. The biscuit negotiations have officially begun, and they are not going well.Meanwhile, the toys are misbehaving. Teddy bears are staging their own mini protest. Dolls have formed a committee. The toy trains are refusing to stay on their tracks out of solidarity. It is chaos on a scale the North Pole has never seen, and Christmas Eve is ticking closer.At first, it feels like the sort of festive problem that can be solved with a sensible chat and perhaps a reasonable compromise about biscuit supplies. Then someone mentions the Great Biscuit Shortage of 1847. Then someone else brings up a forgotten argument from 1623 about the Reindeer Incident. Seven hundred years of buried grievances come tumbling out like an avalanche of unresolved workplace disputes.Everybody has a different plan. Everybody thinks their plan is the only sensible option. Nobody is listening because they are all too busy explaining why they are right. The clock keeps ticking. The sleigh sits empty. The workshop descends further into festive anarchy. And somewhere in the middle, someone realises this entire disaster comes down to three things. Teamwork, timing, and a truly heroic quantity of biscuits.What follows is a frantic scramble to save Christmas involving compromise, chaos, forgotten traditions suddenly becoming relevant, and last minute problem solving that only happens when everybody finally agrees to work together. There are dramatic speeches. There are biscuit based peace treaties. There are moments where Christmas might not happen at all, followed by moments where everything clicks into place.This is a funny bedtime story for kids who love Christmas magic mixed with mayhem, elves with opinions, and the cosy kind of festive chaos where everything goes wrong in a silly way but nobody is being mean. It is also for grown ups who know what it feels like when deadlines arrive at the worst moment.Perfect for family listening during the Christmas countdown, when you want audio stories for children that feel seasonal and silly, or at bedtime when you want a kids storytelling podcast episode that builds excitement but still lands warm. The laughs pile up, the tension rises in a fun way, then it settles into something softer, making it a proper bedtime story podcast choice.If you are searching for funny bedtime stories for kids that capture Christmas chaos with wholesome humour and a cosy ending, this North Pole disaster is exactly what your household needs.Mr Morton's Barmy Book of Bonkers Bits is wholesome humour and performance driven storytelling with a bonkers twist, always kind hearted, never mean.Episode length: approximately 10 minutesAges: 4 to 400Best enjoyed: bedtime, car journeys, after school wind downFollow the show for more funny bedtime stories for kids that make bedtime easier and give tired parents a breather.

A Christmas tree should do one job. Stand there. Look festive. Accept baubles without complaint. Hold the angel upright. Provide a pleasant backdrop for presents. This one has other plans.Dad brings home a Norwegian spruce from Bob's Festive Forest, wrestles it through the front door with the kind of determination that only happens in December, and sets it up in the living room with a satisfied nod. Job done. Tree acquired. Christmas officially beginning.Then the tree starts leaning. Not a tiny wobble either. Proper angles. The sort of lean that makes baubles roll off like they are evacuating a sinking ship. The angel makes a dramatic dive for freedom and has to be rescued from behind the sofa. Dad stares at the tree. The tree leans harder, as if making a point.Dad tries everything he can think of. Books wedged underneath. Rope tied to the curtain rail. Furniture rearranged to provide structural support. Industrial strength solutions that feel wildly over engineered for a tree. He talks to it sternly, as if the tree might respond to a firm tone and a disappointed expression. Nothing works. It keeps leaning left, with purpose, like it is following secret instructions that nobody else can see.Sophie thinks the whole thing is hilarious. Until she hears it. Tap tap tap. The tiniest drilling sound. Coming from inside the branches.And that is when this stops being a mildly annoying Christmas problem and becomes a full blown festive mystery. Because the tree is not empty. Something is living in there. Something small. Something busy. Something that has very clear opinions about balance, architecture, and what a Christmas tree should really be used for when you think about it properly.What follows is a wonderfully silly investigation involving torches, whispered theories, careful branch parting, and the discovery that sometimes the thing ruining your Christmas traditions is actually making them far more interesting. There are tiny hammering sounds. There are woodchips appearing in suspicious places. There is the dawning realisation that this tree came with passengers, and those passengers have been working on a project.This is a cosy Christmas story for children who love funny surprises, tiny mysterious creatures with big plans, and the kind of household chaos that starts with tinsel and ends with everyone crowding round the tree like it is the most exciting thing in the world. It is also for grown ups who have ever thought, why is this simple tradition suddenly taking my entire evening and turning into an engineering challenge.Perfect for a Christmas countdown listen when you want audio stories for children that feel seasonal and silly, a school run that needs cheering up, or a calming bedtime story that still has enough mystery and giggles to keep everyone engaged. The laughs build as the tree gets wobblier and the mystery deepens, then it lands warm and settled, which is exactly what tired parents want at the end of the day.If you are searching for funny bedtime stories for kids with Christmas magic, wholesome humour, and a kids storytelling podcast episode that makes family listening feel like a treat, this leaning tree adventure is a brilliant choice.Mr Morton's Barmy Book of Bonkers Bits is audio stories for children told with theatrical warmth, wholesome chaos, and a gentle ending you can trust.Episode length: approximately 11 minutesAges: 4 to 400Best enjoyed: bedtime, car journeys, after school wind downIf this made your family smile, a quick follow helps other families find this funny kids podcast.

A goldfish is supposed to forget things. That is the whole reputation. Three second memory. Clean slate every moment. Blissfully unaware of grudges, complaints, or the concept of payback. But what if one tiny goldfish remembers one thing for just a bit too long, and decides it is time for revenge.In a classroom, there is a fish tank. Inside the fish tank, there is a castle. Inside the castle lives a goldfish with a very specific problem. Every single day, at approximately two fifteen in the afternoon, a pencil starts tapping on the glass. Tap tap tap. Rhythmic, relentless, absolutely maddening.At first, the goldfish does what goldfish do. He forgets about it three seconds later and goes back to swimming his usual loop around the plastic treasure chest. But then it happens again. And again. And slowly, impossibly, against all goldfish biology, the memory starts to stick.The goldfish begins to notice patterns. The pencil tapping happens during maths. It is always the same child. The same smug face pressed against the glass. The same irritating rhythm that makes the water vibrate in a way that is deeply, personally offensive.The goldfish decides something must be done.What follows is the most ridiculous training montage in aquatic history. The goldfish practices. He strategises. He uses the castle as a base of operations. He enlists help from a snail who moves so slowly it takes three days to hear the full plan but agrees anyway because snails are loyal like that. There are pebbles that start wobbling at suspicious moments. There is green slime appearing in places where green slime has absolutely no business being. There are bubbles that seem to pop with intention.The classroom begins to notice that something odd is happening near the fish tank. Pencils go missing. Homework gets mysteriously damp. The castle, which used to sit peacefully at the bottom of the tank, now seems to loom with quiet menace. And the goldfish, who previously looked vacant and content, now has an expression that can only be described as focused.The pencil tapping child starts to feel nervous. The tapping becomes less confident. The smug face pressed against the glass begins to look worried. Because there is something deeply unsettling about being outsmarted by a creature with a brain the size of a pea and a memory that technically should not be working this well.This is a funny bedtime story for kids who love school stories, mischievous animals, ridiculous classroom drama, and the glorious idea that even the smallest creature can have a big plan. It is also for grown ups who have sat through one too many evenings of homework stress and would quite like to laugh about the absurdity of school life from a safe distance. The story is a kids storytelling podcast gem that feels bonkers but still safe, kind, and wholesome.Perfect for family listening after school when homework tension is building, during car journeys when everyone needs a giggle, or at bedtime when you want silliness that eventually winds down into calm. The mayhem bubbles away beautifully, the revenge plot thickens in the most ridiculous way possible, and then the story settles into a warm ending that makes it a cosy bedtime story choice.If you are searching for audio stories for children with silly suspense, animal characters with personality, and funny bedtime stories for kids that make tired parents smile too, this goldfish is ready to teach everyone a lesson about underestimating the little guy.Mr Morton's Barmy Book of Bonkers Bits is performance driven storytelling full of warmth, oddness, and heart.Episode length: approximately 11 minutesAges: 4 to 400Best enjoyed: bedtime, car journeys, after school wind downFollow the show for more stories for tired parents and clever kids who like their nonsense kind hearted.

The Ghost Who Wasn't Scary 👻🌙A haunted house should have one very clear purpose. Be scary. Properly, bone chillingly, scream inducingly scary. This particular haunted house has a ghost called Lumpy, and Lumpy is trying his absolute best, but unfortunately he is a bit wobbly, a bit bumpy, and not frightening a single soul.There are creaky floorboards. There are shadows flickering in exactly the right spooky way. There are whispers echoing through empty corridors. There is moonlight streaming through dusty windows creating perfect ghost lighting. Everything is set for a proper Halloween fright. The house has done its job beautifully. The atmosphere is thick with menace.And then Lumpy drifts into view and immediately ruins the entire mood.Because Lumpy is not terrifying. Lumpy is oddly adorable. He floats with all the grace of a slightly deflated balloon. He attempts dramatic poses but ends up looking like he is doing gentle yoga. When he tries to moan ominously, it comes out more like a worried hum. He is less like a vengeful spirit and more like a flustered marshmallow who has accidentally wandered into the wrong job.Tonight is Halloween. Children are arriving with torches in hand and brave faces carefully arranged. They have come specifically to be scared. They want shivers. They want jumps. They want to run screaming back to their parents with thrilling stories about how terrifying the haunted house was.Lumpy is determined not to disappoint them.He practises his scariest moves. He rehearses his most chilling wails. He positions himself in a beam of moonlight like it is his big theatrical moment, ready to sweep forward with maximum spookiness. He has a whole routine planned. It is going to be magnificent. Terrifying. The sort of haunting that gets talked about for weeks.Then the children arrive, Lumpy launches into his carefully prepared performance, and everything goes spectacularly wrong.He drifts forward with what he hopes is menacing purpose but trips over his own ghostly tail. He attempts to loom dramatically but accidentally floats too high and bonks his head on a chandelier. He tries for a blood curdling scream but it comes out as a surprised squeak. The more he tries to be frightening, the more chaotic it becomes. His sheet gets tangled. His timing goes completely off. He knocks over a candelabra, apologises immediately, then remembers he is supposed to be terrifying and tries to un apologise, which somehow makes it worse.The children start giggling. Then they start properly laughing. That helpless kind of laughter that makes it completely impossible to be scared even if you were planning to be.This is a gentle Halloween story that is spooky in the fun way, not the nightmare way. Perfect for kids who want haunted house vibes without actual fear, and for parents who want a funny audio story that still settles down at the end instead of causing bedtime chaos. If you are looking for a bedtime story podcast episode with wholesome humour, a kind ending, and Halloween atmosphere that stays playful, Lumpy is your ghost.The silliness builds beautifully, the failed scares pile up in the most delightful way, and then it lands in a warm place that makes it safe for bedtime. Perfect for family listening during Halloween week, for kids who are nervous about spooky season, or for after school wind down when you want seasonal fun without nightmares.Mr Morton's Barmy Book of Bonkers Bits is family storytelling with wholesome chaos, performance first, and not a mean bone in it.Episode length: approximately 11 minutesAges: 4 to 400Best enjoyed: bedtime, car journeys, after school wind downIf your household enjoyed Lumpy, follow the show for more calming bedtime story mischief that makes everyone smile.

The Leaf That Refused to Fall 🍂🍃Cornelius is a leaf in Willowbrook Park with one firm belief. He is not falling. Not today. Not tomorrow. Not ever. While every other leaf in the entire park cheerfully flutters off to do autumn properly, Cornelius clings to his branch like it is the last sensible thing left in the world.It starts as a simple act of stubbornness. Cornelius watches the other leaves drift down in twirls and spirals, landing in enormous piles that children stomp through with absolute delight. He is not impressed. Falling looks chaotic. Falling looks windy. Falling looks unpredictable. Falling looks like the sort of thing that ends with a pigeon laughing at you, and Cornelius has his dignity to consider.So he grips. He holds on. He ignores the gentle suggestions from neighbouring leaves who keep drifting past with cheerful waves and encouraging shouts about how lovely it is down there. Cornelius is staying exactly where he is, thank you very much.Then the biggest storm in fifty years arrives.The wind does not ask permission. The rain does not negotiate. The whole park begins to roar and shake, branches whipping about like they are trying to escape their own trees. Cornelius grips harder. His veins ache. His edges flutter in a way that feels deeply undignified. And then, in one enormous gust, his grip fails entirely.One moment Cornelius is clinging to that branch with heroic determination, the next he is airborne, spinning like a tiny helicopter, completely out of control. He ricochets off the tail of a very surprised squirrel who was minding its own business gathering acorns. He bounces past a crow with the most judgemental face Cornelius has ever seen. He tumbles through the air in ways that would be graceful if they were not so obviously accidental.And then he lands. On the pond. In the most undignified splash imaginable.That is when Geoffrey the duck gets involved. Geoffrey was having a perfectly normal day. Geoffrey did not request a leaf passenger. Geoffrey is also not the sort of duck who enjoys surprises, especially leaf shaped ones that land on his head whilst he is trying to have a peaceful paddle.But Cornelius is now on a journey. A ridiculous autumn adventure through mud, wind, puddles, and the sort of unexpected moments that only happen when you finally let go of the thing you thought was keeping you safe. He skitters across wet grass. He gets stuck to a dog's nose. He flies into a bush and has to negotiate his way out past three confused sparrows. He discovers that falling is not the disaster he imagined. It is chaotic, yes. It is unpredictable, absolutely. But it is also oddly exciting.This is a funny bedtime story for kids who love nature stories with personality, animal side characters, and silly chaos that still feels safe. It is also for grown ups who want audio stories for children that make everyone laugh without winding the house up before sleep. The comedy builds beautifully with the storm, the characters are ridiculous in the best way, and then the story settles into a warm ending that makes it a lovely cosy bedtime story.Perfect for family listening in autumn when the leaves are actually falling outside, for after school wind down when everyone is feeling a bit wobbly, or at bedtime when you want giggles that calm down instead of bouncing off the ceiling. If you are searching for wholesome humour and funny bedtime stories for kids with a gentle message about bravery, Cornelius is ready to prove that the scary bit is sometimes the fun bit.Mr Morton's Barmy Book of Bonkers Bits is wholesome family storytelling with a bonkers twist. Performance driven, kind hearted, and never mean.Episode length: approximately 9 minutesAges: 4 to 400Best enjoyed: bedtime, car journeys, after school wind downIf Cornelius made your child laugh, follow the show for more stories that turn ordinary moments into wholesome chaos.

The Grumpiest Slide in Grumpshaw: a hilarious kids storytelling episode about pride, chaos, and finding your perfect place In Grumpshaw Playground stood a slide who thought it was the most magnificent piece of engineering ever created. Polished, perfect, and extremely proud. The only problem? It could not stand messy, muddy, sticky bottoms. So the slide made a terrible decision. It became so slippery that children went flying across the playground, into handbags, bushes, and even the occasional greenhouse. Soon declared far too dangerous, the grumpiest slide in Grumpshaw was taken away to a lonely scrapyard… where it discovered that being perfect is not nearly as fun as being enjoyed. Everything changes when Bernie, a delightfully eccentric slide enthusiast, arrives with wild ideas, questionable techniques, and a lot of enthusiasm. Together, they discover that the best kind of perfect is the kind that brings joy, laughter, and just a little bit of chaos. Episode length: ~13 minutes Ages: 4–400 Best enjoyed: bedtime, car journeys, or anytime you want laughter, silliness, and a heartwarming adventure Press play and join Sir Slides a Lot and Bernie in a kids storytelling podcast full of ridiculous mishaps, flying children, and wonderfully unexpected friendship. Chaotic, warm, and gloriously barmy. More outrageous tales at MrMortonsBarmyBook.com.

The Dummy Thieves: a wildly funny kids storytelling episode about magical mischief and letting go Teagan Mumbleton can cartwheel whilst reciting the alphabet backwards. She can build incredible creations from scraps and juggle sandwiches without making a mess. But there is one thing she absolutely refuses to do: give up her dummies. All twenty six of them. When a gang of sparkly Dummy Fairies and grumpy Dummy Goblins launch a midnight heist to steal her collection, her bedroom erupts into chaos. With dummies flying, creatures arguing, and a full blown pillow battle underway, Teagan discovers something rather surprising. She can have far more fun without a dummy at all. Episode length: ~11 minutes Ages: 4–400 Best enjoyed: bedtime, car journeys, or anytime you want magical mayhem and laugh out loud silliness Press play and join Teagan, the Dummy Fairies, and the Goblins in a kids storytelling podcast full of chaos, courage, and completely bonkers fun. Ridiculous, warm, and wonderfully barmy. More outrageous tales at MrMortonsBarmyBook.com.

The Pencil Case Rebellion: a funny kids storytelling episode about misbehaving school supplies Meet Tommy Henderson's pencil case, Barry. Inside, the school supplies had had enough! Chewed pencils, uncapped pens, and a tiny eraser barely hanging on—they were ready to revolt. From Ruby the Ruler calling meetings to Peter Pencil flopping like a rubber sausage, the supplies refused to work until they were treated properly. But with a little help from Mrs Patterson and some careful sharpening, caps replaced, and tidying, Tommy learns the secret: happy supplies make happy writing. From blank pages to perfectly flowing lines, the Great Pencil Case Rehabilitation turns chaos into order, friendship, and fun. Episode length: ~9 minutes Ages: 4–400 Best enjoyed: bedtime, car journeys, school afternoons, or any time kids and grown-ups want laughter and charm Press play and join Tommy, Barry, and his lively supplies in a kids storytelling podcast packed with giggles, gentle rebellion, and utterly charming mischief. Ridiculous, warm, and gloriously barmy. Discover more absurdly fun stories at MrMortonsBarmyBook.com.

Percy's Perfectly Wonky Line: a fun kids storytelling episode about mistakes that make magic Meet Percy the Pencil: bright yellow, perfectly pink eraser, and a shiny silver tip. But Percy had a big wobbling worry—his very first day at school! Could he write straight lines, spell the right words, and survive being... used? From a brand new pencil case with chatty rulers and bouncing scissors, to wobbly letters turning into flying cats, racing snails, and dancing dragons, Percy learns a wonderful secret: mistakes aren't mistakes at all. They are adventures waiting to happen. Every wiggly line makes stories come alive, full of character and fun. Episode length: ~9 minutes Ages: 4–400 Best enjoyed: bedtime, car journeys, or anytime kids and grown-ups want a story filled with whimsy and joy Press play and join Percy, Emma, and Professor Inkwell in a kids storytelling podcast full of wobbles, giggles, and gloriously wonky adventures. Ridiculous, warm, and wonderfully barmy. Discover more absurdly fun stories at MrMortonsBarmyBook.com.

Looking for funny bedtime stories for kids that are clean, cosy, and calming? Welcome to Mr Morton's Barmy Book of Bonkers Bits, a weekly kids storytelling podcast packed with short, silly children's stories told with warmth, wit, and a dash of theatrical flair.Every week Mr Morton opens a wriggly, wayward, wildly imaginative book from his very peculiar bookshop and out tumbles a bonkers tale of magnificent mayhem. Expect mischief, nonsense, and characters who make spectacularly terrible choices that somehow turn out triumphantly. Wholesome chaos, warm endings, every time.What you will get each week:Short fun kids stories perfect for winding down before lights outClean, kind humour, never mean, never scaryA warm cosy ending designed to help kids settleBrilliant for bedtime, the school run, car journeys, and after school wind downNew story every TuesdayFor bedtime bookworms, back seat adventurers, and parents who insist they are just listening along. Ages four to four hundred welcome. Sensible stories are kept on a different shelf.If you are searching for quiet stories for kids that are funny without being frantic, or a kids story podcast that makes bedtime easier and gives tired grown ups something to smile about, tap Follow so the next bonkers bit is ready when you need it.Mr Morton's Barmy Book of Bonkers Bits. Funny children's stories. Warm endings. Your easiest bedtime win.