our pod

This is Thee Bieber Fever. He (Justin Bieber) is literally the reason Ivana is having her whole Christian thing. She has to reckon with that. The girls have to be serving Charisma, Uniqurness, Nerve, and Talent in a really major way during these AI times. Bella needed a binder at D-Box movie. Ivana has always known that she will have to become evil. To flip the patriarchy to the matriarchy. But through her own downfall, we will be able to achieve equality. Bella agrees. And Lorde continues to catch strays on this podcast….

Two cups stand before us. Sure, everything is open for interpretation but these tea leaves are Bella. Ivana says a movie is the closest thing an average person can have to going to Space. Kibo Sushi tried to make Bella seem fucked up but she’s NORMAL! Regarding the chewing, we want everyone to know that we’re learning and we’re fucking listening. Anna from the post office-Crystal shop made Bella doubt her own knowledge of Lady Gaga. Ivana doesn’t need to watch the new Harry Potter show because she’s not a pervert. She’s a grownup. And do you guys notice that we’re wrapping it up kind of quickly?

Despite Ivana turning thirty, the girls return to old pod days and smoke 4 joints pre recording. And they were just saying, there is really so much going on right now. Some good. Lots good! Some bad. Some weird. Ivana was feeling that everyone was neglecting her drumming. Meanwhile, the sales associate at Long & Mcquade did a bold and brash assumption against Bella. Remember when Ivana “took” the mic? The girls become absolutely transfixed on the song "Crickets Sing for Ana Maria." And there IS such a thing as hot Ice cream. Tyra Banks invented it. 

Bella doesn’t think having a band is that hard. We proved it, didn’t we? Ivana decides to give up being a paper towel eco terrorist for Lent. That Jamaican pic of Adele looks totally like something AI would’ve done. Bella wrote “another man that’s hot” on the list and has absolutely no idea who it was. You can’t even imagine how much it meant to Ivana as an Italian girl who grew up with all Colombians to see Lady Gaga at Bad Bunny’s halftime show. More than anything, the sports at the Winter Olympics are completely made up. First they (the woke mob) came for Emerald, and we said nothing. Then they came for Bella….

Well, we had show. You guys had to be there. And most of you were! Bella knew that by the time we got to the end of the show… Ivana would sing. And sing, she did. Bella felt the Toronto earthquake from across the world. Ivana has developed intimacy with Jacob Elordi in their two s*x dreams. Bella says that being an interviewer feels like “being me.” Margot Robbie is woman and Ivana has known it since Grade 9. And jeans? On Bad Bunny’s big night?

Our “seasons” are pretty arbitrary but it is the Season 2 Our Pod Finale and we have a BIG announcement. Asking Bella to wear contacts would be like asking Harry Potter to wear contacts! Aria Montgomery was first and foremost, deplorable, and secondly, homophobic. When Ivana says “focused” on the gay hockey show, what she means is “horny.” Bella’s problem with Love Actually is the whole “on Christmas you tell the truth.” Christmas is not about telling the truth. It’s about gifts and Santa. And it’s okay to gay bait if you do it really good.

So, it’s 35 minutes straight of Wicked: For Good spoilers and then straight into overnight oats. It’s so true that you eat a plum on the beach. Ivana rode the mic and Bella is top. On PLL, the biggest enemy is a trans woman. Did you know that? Ivana is plugged into the world in a numerical way. We like some of the Lorde songs but what the hell does she know about being nonbinary? And just so quickly, a coffee shop that Bella’s addicted to.

Well? Well, what sister? Ivana told her hairdresser to do what he wanted and, he did. Bella’s tap class was doing gender bending with Boogie Woogie Bugle Boy. Ivana maladaptive daydreamed about: Angelina Jolie, Amanda Seyfried, Dianna Agron, and Lauren Jauregi. If having vivid sex dreams means demon, then that would mean a succubus is living in Bella’s house. The girls are understanding why they didn’t get cast on Traitors Canada. And didn’t Bella just mention Lily Allen on pod?

Everyone wants to be a Scarlett, no one wants to be Dr. Plum. At the end of the day, Taylor Swift, you may be gay but let us tell you something…. You will never be queer. The moon was full and bright on the night of Addison Rae. The Family Stone reminded Ivana of the Christmas movie that her and Bella wrote, except theirs is so better. We’ve talked a lot of shit about Libras on this pod and now it’s like, yeah, Ivana’s eating crows pie. And some bad news: two of Bella’s loved ones doubted that she could successfully dress up as a knight...

Can you believe Ivana’s already on her third fairy book? She’s reading fast. The girls discover that at the centre of their Venn diagram is having a crush on Bad Bunny. Ivana making a TikTok is a bit like Taylor Swift making an album. Bella hates to be gendered on the pod but do you think One Battle After Another is a boy movie? We heard from our communities about scissoring. In a fully platonic way, it actually *is* a bit yummy to see Addison Rae so in their body. And are you guys ready to talk shit about Taylor Swift? If you don’t wanna do it, log off now.

The last time that Bella went to Medieval Times, Ivana wasn’t her Best Friend Forever yet. But she saw the stories. First and foremost: Fuck You J.K. Rowling. Ivana has a very exciting update about the Azerbaijani village family that she watches everyday on YouTube. Scissoring does exist in the sense that anything is possible between two human bodies. Bella doesn’t like fan service to gay people and Ivana doesn’t like dream sequences. And if you guys think this podcast is long, try Trisha Paytas’.

For listeners, Ivana’s hair is positively 1920s and her shirt is positively ribeye. Bella thinks it’s incredible to have a t-shirt with both Lady Gaga and Ariana Grande on it. Ivana didn’t know what the movie Snow White and The Huntsman means to Bella. If the makers of S3 Traitors Canada were interested in making a compelling season of television that would disrupt Canadian Media forever, they would’ve just centred the whole show around Ivana and Bella. And when this is out, everything will be different. Rah rah.

Update from last ep: Bella was haunted. Both the girls have Barenaked Ladies stories? Oh, I’m sure. Random but Ivana was shocked at Eve Babitz being good. Bella hates to take it to a place of toilet but she’s made a huge mistake. Ivana can't wait for Dua Lipa's theatre concept. Bella’s high school yearbook quote was “Mischief Managed” which sucks because she wasn’t in the year book at all. What mischief? How gay people will go to a JLo show, straight people will go to Oasis. Oh wait, we forgot to shut the tennis off.

Most conversation-starting card decks are made for people who hate each other. Question: do you guys think Bella is being haunted rn? Taylor Swift announcing her new album on a football podcast is oracle that Trump will be elected third term. And if you need Bella to explain that, she can’t even help you. Ivana receives a prophecy on a wedding dance floor. In Bella’s 2AM scrolling, she stumbled upon a card trick artist. They call it “cardistry.”If the girls managed to switch places “Freaky Friday” style, the only thing they would do is just keeping podcasting.

So basically what we’re gonna do is dance. And that’s an order. The girls can’t believe that Santana Lopez never got to do Sneaker Night. Basically Ivana went to Vancouver and Bella went to creek. Ivana will wear elf ears to the Ren Faire to reconnect with her ancestors. Meanwhile Bella is dead serious about making chainmail because "how hard can it be"? Ivana was finally exposed to the show that's sweeping the nation by storm and was shocked to learn they call this girl Belly. Bella fell off during “Dancing with the devil, the Art of Starting over” but previous to that, she’s off book on every single Demi Lovato song. Sorry, Ivana forgot her water bottle. And she has to fill it up.

Bella embraces Ivana and all of Ivana when she posts a thirst trap. The girls are doing "can I say?" about Justin Bieber this episode. Because guess what, a Pisces can be an asshole and a true romantic at the same time. Play by JLo is the original mother that the apple fell from the tree of that is Club Classics by Charli XCX. Bella poses a new age old question: today do you feel like Coconut Man, Moonhead or Pea? One might think Ivana is a Moonhead, but she is Pea through and through. It would make total sense for Andy Sachs from Devil Wears Prada to have become a power dyke after her transformative experience with Miranda Priestly. The girls have a hot take about Fifth Harmony: ALL good.

When it comes to Bella’s new post-surgery voice, it’s important to remember: a diva’s register is never low. Everything else is simply high. The girls shiver at having both interfaced with one Jax Taylor, and even manifest his firing. Hey, before we get the Biphobia Alarms going, remember that Ivana has the bi sticker! By the way, it’s OUR pod. So if you want to come on, you have to ask us. Anyways, Ivana is the economy, doll, and Bella is the substance. Oh, and Lorri’s here.

Bella’s not saying that LA has changed Ivana, but it’s a bit LA has changed Ivana. Prayers for Jojo Siwa, always. And guess what? Prayers to everyone. Even those who Ivana hates. Addison Rae’s whole brand is kind of, you would love her to be your older or younger sister. Or crush. The Fifth Harmony song “Squeeze” was formative to Ivana’s queerness. And Bella has had an imagination for as long as she can remember...

There’s a Pre-Camp and a Post-Camp.The good thing about camping is that Bella survived. The bad thing about camping is that it was worse than you can even imagine. The girls ponder the age old question, what show would be more better than Hacks? Ivana really wants to rail against the TV industry making us believe that workplace is like family. Bella didn’t know that people could have the same birthday before Rosie O’Donnell. And turns out, it’s kind of hard to fight Pride when you’re proud.

This week, members of the brood who are Team Ivana get a win. Bella wasn’t hooked on the L Word but she was bricked up for Rizzoli & Isles. Is there any more perfect love song than the one that goes “When the moon hits your eye, like a big pizza pie”? Ivana will just say this really quick: she’s in an email fight with the Enneagram Personality Test people. Bella synthesizes the ethos of the podcast into one simple question: tree or bush? Oh yeah, and Steph’s here. Don’t mind her.

Episode starts with some housekeeping questions: which version of yourself are you carrying with you and what food is your chart? For members of the brood who are Team Ivana, this is going to be a long episode for you because Bella has a lot to say. If the girls could get one message through to Hailey Bieber’s ears it would be: leaving him will make you a bonafide star. The way Ivana gets to do Two Astrologies of the Week, Bella now gets to do One Liza Fact of the Week. And seriously, please no one steal Ivana and Jaymes’ Ed Sheeran jukebox musical idea.

Let us take you to a world where Bella lives in Etobicoke and Ivana lives in a condo. With gay, it can be so confusing to know if you have a crush or if that’s your blood sister. Ivana feels that the culture is a bit anti-polyamory right now but she doesn’t read articles, as you know. Bella got lost in the thought that she had her wisdom teeth removed around the same time as Beyoncé’s digital drop. Unfortunately, due to timing, we’re going to have to push “which months are gay” until next episode. And Our message to Traitors Canada is simple: who if not us?

"Don’t Cha” by The Pussycat Dolls is leading Bella to ask the age old question, what do you feel like: a lady, a soldier, a doll, or a fella? Today, Ivana is a soldier. Look at any of the looks on the Met Gala red carpet and know that Blake Lively was doing that in "A Simple Favour" (2018). Bella confuses Ivana's controversially-older-girlfriend fantasy for Kathryn Hahn with ERICA Hahn. The fictional heart surgeon lesbian from season 2 of Grey's Anatomy, of course. Doing your Enneagram personality test with someone is like having gay sex in a different kind of way. It's radical to be she/her when you’re dressed like Ivana is. And until someone gives us a monetary sponsorship to be Proud, we will not be celebrating Pride. 

Happy Lesbian Visibility week to Bella. Ivana, unfortunately, is feeling more bi than ever. If Ivana was on Love On The Spectrum her introduction would be: Ivana loves “The Idea Of You.” Ivana hates “Eileen.” Hey, can we ask you a question? Did you pay the tolls to the angels? Five gays told Bella she influenced Mayhem in the Desert. And five is a lot of gays. The greatest actress and star is Ivana for pretending she hasn’t heard Bella’s stories 18 times earlier. And finally, based on the carabiners JANGLING, things are changing in the spaces of Lorde’s identity. What other podcast is doing it like this? 

As Lady Gaga says, the girls are living just as free as their hair. Ivana is experiencing the highs and joys of life in her rec league soccer group chat. If you feel weird about Ariana Grande, think about if you’re a good person and you love your friends. When it comes to Benny Blanco, Bella is a girl who says height matters. Inspired by Brian Johnson, Ivana is going to forgo a social life, dreams, and passions to maintain a routine. It’s official. The three greatest songs in the world are simply “I Will Always Love You” by Whitney Houston/Dolly Parton, “The Climb” by Miley Cyrus, and “Vanish Into You” by Lady Gaga. Ivana wants her White Lotus finale predictions on record in case they come true. (Update: she was wrong about pretty much every point). 

In true Our Pod fashion, our first ever guest does NOT have a microphone. But, it’s Steph (@steph.veiga on tt). You all get it. Bella got scared because she realized she didn’t have any skills for Steph’s homestead. Luckily now she’s getting really good at “fire.” And as Ivana says, fire is earth’s animation. When it comes to Divergent, Steph is a Dauntless and Bella knows that because they went to Tulum together. There is so much stigma around March. March is a Friday and that does NOT make April a Saturday! Steph and Ivana try to guess Bella’s favourite Gaga song but the thing about Bella is words don’t matter with her. And finally, when it comes to carabiner code, neither shall live while the other shall top... 

Ivana poses one simple question to her sister: How are you? Bella thought she would get a heroes delivery to the OR for her cancer but… she just walked with her tight hospital pants. Puss basically out. Meanwhile at her birthday, Ivana made everyone make meaning out of the loot bags. Her genuine birthday wish: to spend more time gaming. As in playing games. Finally 50-minutes in, let’s get to the list. Ivana finally got hate-crimed and she can’t even really claim all of it herself. Bella, however, has been hate-crimed many times. Bella loves that Karla Sofia went to the Oscars. It’s not the time to be an evil trans woman… but if you are gonna be one, sure. Show up to the Oscars. And if Traitors Canada production is listening, don’t worry… no one will really know about this podcast. It’s a bit of a niche audience. GROWING EVERYDAY…. 

Azealia Banks is right. The gays have to sit this one out. Bella is treating Mayhem like it’s Gaga's self-titled. Ivana is going between Garden of Eden and Zombieboy. Garden of Eden and Zombieboy. And obviously, all of them. Bella knew at 12:01 am that Killah was the one. Ivana believes Gaga about her blade of grass story. Bella, not so much. Here’s the thing: Gaga's horny for Michael. And he’s a good boy. And if your only reference to 80s music is Taylor Swift, you were probably born a few years ago.

7-and-a-half minutes spent on Bubly flavours and Bella’s girlfriend’s incredible hat. In Ivana’s mom’s world, the Italian pop star Elodie is on par with Lady Gaga. Bella gets really smart about language and queer inclusivity in the Lucy Dacus video. Ivana says YES! Bella loves Jesus Christ Superstar but she does NOT want a Mario Magdalene.  It would be amazing to Ivana if they cast Janelle Monae as Mary Magdalene. Bella knows everything about her sister. She did not know about Irv. This is a new segment: Ivana has to do Jackson Maine impression once per episode. Listen, Bella has fucking cancer. You don’t want us to go for an hour and a half? 

Sometimes when God closes a door, he goes ahead and opens a window. And that’s basically what happened when Bella soaked Ivana’s podcast equipment with PC Blue Menu sparkling water. Regardless... it's finally Abracadabra time. Mayhem’s pronouns are she/her. Ivana’s pronouns are May/hem. But no matter what way you split it, if Ivana had been the One Less Lonely Girl, she would’ve ended up straight. Trust Bella when she says she’s not coming for the Child Reporter as a PERSON. Just the energy with which we’ve allowed child reporters to exist. Ivana will say it again and and again: dancers should get paid more than doctors. Bella thought her snail died but guess what? It was just impregnating itself. And brood, you’ll never hold anything against us again after you hear what's wrong with Bella.

Okay, off the top, Ivana wants to know, do you guys like that? (inconsistent posting, poor sound quality). Bella did comedy in little fucked up comedy spaces with two of the biggest girls in the world. Ivana thinks every short film is a miracle. She just hates them so much. Bella's art form is Instagram stories. When you see "Dolce," you think of Ivana. And when you see teal, you think of Dolce. Something happened this Aquarius season where everyone is speaking to Bella in riddles. And let’s just be honest about the fact that this is going to be a Housewives episode. Even though nobody in the Brood wants or gives us positive feedback about that. So if you don't like Housewives and Ivana chomping on Haribo Zings while she talks about them… Go to the next podcast, doll!

Happy 2025. We’re so off our game that… we’re on our game. Bella knew Ivana was capable of Yahtzee so that’s why she felt comfortable abandoning her. When it comes to a wedding ring, Dua Lipa wants to be twiddling that fucking thing and seeing it shine on her finger. Ivana gets intense Wednesday scaries thinking about having to go into an office tomorrow. Bella wonders if Ivana will wear a pencil skirt. Ivana hates to tell a beautiful woman that she was hysterical but she’ll do it. Bella was preoccupied by how disgusting Nosferatu was. Ivana was really concerned about how he transported his coffin to London. Cynthia Erivo almost died for Wicked promo in a cave with Bear Grylls. Are you hearing the words Bella is saying? 

We’re not even gonna explain where we’ve been but Pluto is responsible for a lot of what’s going on right now. Everyone is either bitchy or annoying. Ivana is bitchy. Bella? Annoying. Kristin Chenoweth and Idina…. CHRISTINA! Ivana has some questions about Conclave and it’s just like, what did you think the whole movie was about? Anyways. Back to Wicked. Let’s just talk quickly about Cynthia Ariana Gay. There are girls in Toronto that have podcasts, but not everyone is going to meet Angie Katsenevas. With their tits out. The mystery of what Christmas movie Bella is talking about comes to light. And when it comes to Luigi, violence only begets more violence and we’re the violence that’s been begotten! You understand?!

Well. It’s going to be a hard November for any listeners who don’t like Wicked, we’ll say that. Bella says we only have one hour because her brand new girlfriend can’t see us podding. Ivana was enchanted by herself in long, blonde ringlets. In terms of New Years…. That’s something everyone is talking about. Meanwhile, Beyoncé dares to ask the question, “You know Christmas?” Bella kink shames proudly. Ivana would be the tallest nun in the world. Bella went to Buffalo for a $20 snippet of Defying Gravity and now Ivana understands about Cynthia Erivo. The snippet gets played twice and no, the girls did not cut it out. 

Our pod makes it’s triumphant return. Within moments, Bella is singing Wicked. Noor says Ivana has bad habits. Bella’s update is that she interviewed literal Lady Gaga and people are saying that real journalism is back. Ivana’s updates will come in weeks. And just know, they are hard and mighty. Bella has a neural link with Ivana and Ivana has one with Dua Lipa. The girls went to SWEAT Tour and it was even funner than they imagined. The comp het master doc gets brought up. The “B” in LGBTQ stands for Bella. From now until November, the pod is on official Wicked watch. Ivana and Bella are yin and fucking Yang. And THAT will never change!  Produced and edited by Noor and Ivana 

After two weeks of Bad Audio, the girls are lezzing out with Producer Noor and little Pepper. In honour of soccer summer coming to a close, Ivana is gonna get together a team of queers so good at soccer that we win. Bella will be the mascot. When Ivana was a little girl, she remembers watching Sex and the City and wondering why everyone wasn’t more horny for Charlotte. Dyke Halloween is going to a party and there’s two Jo Calderones. One short, one tall. Ivana’s sister is NOT a sir. But Bella WAS living her non-binary tea at the Habbo Hotel. And with Our Pod, if it’s not one thing, it’s the other.Produced by: Noor

Well, well, well. Mercury retrograde strikes the Our Pod studio once again, forcing us to release a short episode this week. But still, the girls are back and they have a whole new outlook. After all, when something is lost (i.e. half an episode), something else is found (i.e. Bella’s weed pen). Not to be a sex pest but, Bella was disappointed when Ivana didn’t sleep under her weighted blanket. If you want to know what Bella looked like in the dress she wore to a wedding this weekend, go to Instagram right now and type in “graciebon.” You’ll know when you see her. When it comes to Chappel Roan, all Ivana really has to say is it goes back to Greek times. And it’s really important for Bella to have a crush because crush fuels earth. Or at least two girls like us…. 

The girls are 9 joints deep but still lucky, grateful, thankful and abundant. Ivana’s special interest snack is just: banana, crunchy peanut butter, chocolate chips. We don’t have to dwell on it. But big rice cakes are not Ivana’s culture at all so she needs to visualize them. Bella saw about 14 hundred movies this weekend. Oklahoma is essentially having a level-5 twister every day but what Ivana can’t figure out is why that actress was blonde. How everyone remembers Paul Blart for the Segway, everyone will remember Bella for the scooter. Channing Tatum technically saw the ourpod studio and he said he’d love to kick back there. Bella shaving her legs is her Charlize Theron shave head moment. And the girls implore you to make sure that your SPIRIT is leading your way through Letterboxd…

Take a load off! We’re outside today and it’s 5’o’clock somewhere. This is the authentic episode because when it comes to having a blue check mark and meeting your favourite podcasters, authentic and organic is best. Kind of something very iconic about when Bella met Kelly Clarkson is that Kelly Clarkson had a shaved side head. Like a lesbian! Bella hates the phrase “girls, gays, and theys” because she says it’s self-congratulatory. Ivana hates the phrase because Bella says so. Umbrellas as a concept…. Queer. Bella’s not telling you to rate ourpod 5-stars but Ivana is, because it takes NOTHING to give two girls 5-stars. Let’s have some fun, this beat is sick after all. And the Girl Who Left Bella Out Of The Yearbook makes her triumphant return to the pod…. Edited & Produced by Noor

New segment: Movie We Should Write and this week it’s gay, dyke Dr. Doolittle. The girls think it’s a really good litmus test to see how someone plays Sims. And we had an incredible moment this weekend… it was so magic and the story simply goes, Bella let Ivana borrow an off-white clutch slash purse. Bella has object baby impermanence with 99% of housewives when they’re not filming. Ivana did just start re-reading her fairy smut but she’s only reading for the fairy dynamics. When it comes to our romantic astro compatibility reading, lazy mornings are for lovers but Bella will skip parts like that. Five out of five on physical attraction but liking Ivana has its drawbacks…. Produced & Edited by Noor

The list is angry today and the girls are going rogue with this episode. We’re coming to you completely unedited, raw and real and wearing temporary tattoos. First things first, when hot girls wear little glasses, it’s a bit “my culture is not a costume” and Bella can say that because she is legally blind in one eye. Ivana will miss her sister when the grid goes down but Bella won’t be taking Ivana to her homestead. Love Island and Lord of The Rings get equal amount of time. After everything that’s gone on with Julia Fox and Bella this year….. now LESBIAN? Hello. She is so everywhere, she is so Julia. And you know who else is everywhere? Mother Gaia. Bella was worried her sister cyber bullied a strong, non-binary singing group. One day, the girls will receive celebrity treatment of receiving a complimentary bread and cheese plate…. 

We’re back and the girls MISSED laughing with each other. First and foremost, Our Pod does NOT recognize C*nada Day despite the fireworks. Let July 1st be known as National Our Pod Day! It’s a soccer summer and still to Bella to this day, there’s nothing cooler or scarier than a soccer girl. Ivana is ambidextrous for feet. Bella says put a trigger warning before saying stuff like that. An experience at Pride made Bella say, gays are okay after all. And something fucking major happened at the wedding Ivana officiated and it involves Bella Hadid. Gobble, gobble…. We’ll leave it at that. Produced and edited by Noor.

Off the jump, the girls are pitting pop stars against one another. Well, Ivana won’t slander Olivia Rodrigo ever. Bella says that, now more than ever, we need pop music to be kind of about nothing. But when it comes to BRAT, that’s true poetry. Bella puts a lot of stuff in her toilet that shouldn’t go in there and Ivana’s heavy duty plunger is summoned. New segment: Guess Which Part Made Ivana Cry. Bella went to Wicked for the 8th time and didn’t expect to walk away with a crush on Glinda (blatant lie). If Ivana is anything, it’s proud to be an Ozian. And once again, Bella is reiterating that she did NOT have a sexy dream about Ivana. But it came too close for comfort….. Produced and edited by Noor

We’re visually succinct on one couch... Finally. Bella has gay wrists and Ivana has flappy hands and together, that makes a dynamic duo. The girls don’t really feel impressed by Greek salad in a sandwich. Bella has interviewed two A-list celebrities in the last two days and don’t you think one was flirting with her? Ivana unlocked lots of childhood memories watching Moonstruck and Bella immediately knows which part made her sister sob.  Sometimes it’s good to remember the moon is about love and not just astrology. The Bridgerton buggy finger-blast scene really did it for the girls. And Bella has nothing to say but she just wants to say: Gina Romaine.  Produced and edited by Noor

We might need straight jackets to stop touching the mic stand but the girls are trying to be good for the podcast. Ivana talks about her outfit at the club and why that was meaningful (she was wearing a hat). Bella tells Ivana not to be smug because cute girls think she's Daddy. Lady Gaga and our friend both broke the fourth wall at Chromatica Ball. Ivana knows laughter is the best medicine. Bella only bragged to her sister about being good at sex in the context of when that person called her a bottom (derogatory). The rule is when you do a doctor admin day, you get a BIG chocolate vanilla swirl and when you get your pussy swabbed, a whole focaccia. That’s how it has to be. Produced and edited by Noor 

Well, it’s Wednesday and so what about it? No paper towel roll is safe from Bella but that’s okay because people who don’t make a lot of garbage, Ivana doesn’t think are clean. Bella is ready for a smoking hot reality star to match her dorky comedian freak. Ivana was brave to change out of her cargo pants. Bella was rattled to see Taylor Swift at it again! Ivana doesn’t have good media literacy. The girls agree that there’s something sinister about people who seek out uncomfortable situations (I.e. camping in a tent, moving to Vancouver to be outdoorsy). When you’re turning to the awe of nature to fill you up, sometimes what you actually need is a podcast with your best friend. And at the end of the day, the girls love using a toilet and love taking a break. produced & edited by: noor

If you’re noticing Bella’s energy has a glow about it this episode, it’s because we have a big announcement on pod: Bella is single. Former crush era is over and we’re entering a new era, in more ways than one. Bella can just tell when someone is dykey from behind. If anyone knows someone who owns the world’s smallest dog named Mochi, please get in contact with us urgently. Ivana bravely reveals her new crush is DJ James Kennedy even though she previously called him a nasty little f-slur in DMs. The girls decide to have a Katie Maloney summer, where we only kinda say what we mean. And what we want. Ivana’s celebrity doppelgänger is not Noah Cyrus but…. maybe it is…. Huge pussy AND hemmroids? It’s part of life and guess what, it’s women’s health.  Produced by Noor

The girls are giggling today. Bella’s dog, Stella,  is here and she’s staring right in Ivana’s eyes. Several minutes of Ivana petting Stella and Bella marvelling at their connection. The girls went thrifting together and they got complimented a LOT. Ivana is strongly petitioning to make Our Pod a Riverdale recap podcast.  SPOILERS AGAIN for the show Ripley which, luckily, no one else is watching, not even Bella anymore. Ivana scares herself and Bella at her photographic memory of Glee. Bella was H’d up BAD for The Idea of You even though sometimes man-woman romcom doesn’t connect with her. The  truest test of intimacy is to pretend you are on American Idol and sing to your lover as if you are fighting for your ticket to Hollywood. And do you think Ivana killed Naya Rivera? Listen and decide for yourself…. 

Sometimes it’s Monday, sometime’s it’s Thursday and the girls are ready to go FAST. Every Housewife franchise needs only two things: 1) wacky religious behaviour, and 2) shitting on floor behaviour. The girls discover a shared connection to Harrison Ford that electrifies them. Bella unlocks feelings for Jett of Jett and Pookie. Ivana was borderline already there with Jett but she’s NOT taking this crush from Bella. At what point do we say Taylor Swift is a cult leader? Bella reveals a motto that she lives by. Ivana confuses a pangram for a profound saying. Doing a podcast is about letting the segments come naturally and our weekly segment is called “Isabella Has One Bad Thing to Say About Reneé Rapp.” And we’ll have you know that often more than 30 people listen to this pod….. 

Our Pod has officially met Jax Taylor. So how about that? Imagine if all of a sudden Isabella was tall and Ivana was short. To be clear: Isabella is NOT saying “I did it first” with Chappell Roan. Are gay people annoying or just young people? Ivana thinks Isabella is just reckoning with community is beautiful. Horniness comes and goes but the girls pinky promise to reveal to each other and to pod if they ever have a sex dream about the other. Ivana has a bone to pick with Taylor Swift’s backwards hat and the love language “quality time.” Isabella has a bone to pick with Reneé Rappachella and the love language “touch” with friends. And if Ivana’s dreams are prophetic, what does it mean that Chappell Roan was rude….  SPOILERS FOR LOVE LIES BLEEDING