Tales from the Pit

In a Very Special Beanus Episode of the otherwise-dormant Tales from the Pit, Michael links up with longtime Small Beans community member nekomander to pick her brain about her father's recent passing. This is done for totally selfish reasons, but that doesn't mean you won't also benefit from the conversation. Please consider donating to neko's kickstarter if you find it a fruitful listen! It'll help defray the cost of interring her Dad's remains: https://www.gofundme.com/f/support-dinos-critical-care-family-travel?lang=en_US

Mike checks in with his Mom about the book she's writing, surviving an early life filled with cosmic horror-levels of trauma, finally finding help, and how grateful they both are to still be here. Features: Michael Swaim: https://bsky.app/profile/michaelswaim.bsky.social And his Mom. Music by Abe Epperson. Support Small Beans and access Additional Content: https://www.patreon.com/SmallBeans Check our store to buy Small Beans merch! https://www.teepublic.com/stores/the-small-beans-store?ref_id=22691

Director/Flirt Jessica Ellis stops by the pit to discuss the protean effects of long COVID and the seeming programmed mentality toward sickness we all share (and how that changes over time). Features: Jessica Ellis: https://bsky.app/profile/baddestmamajama.bsky.social Michael Swaim: https://bsky.app/profile/michaelswaim.bsky.social Music by Abe Epperson. Support Small Beans and access Additional Content: https://www.patreon.com/SmallBeans Check our store to buy Small Beans merch! https://www.teepublic.com/stores/the-small-beans-store?ref_id=22691

Anny and John Liot graciously share their miscarriage story with Michael to complete his series on childbirth and childrearing. Losing a baby during pregnancy is one of the more common nightmare scenarios modern humans undergo, so we may as well talk about it and see if that helps. This is a rough one - features asshole doctors and systemic failures throughout. https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/im-glad-you-exist/id1506468558 Features: Michael Swaim: https://bsky.app/profile/michaelswaim.bsky.social Music by Davey Francis. Support Small Beans and access Additional Content: https://www.patreon.com/SmallBeans Check our store to buy Small Beans merch! https://www.teepublic.com/stores/the-small-beans-store?ref_id=22691

Michael meets with Cody Franks of the Least Haunted pod and Seqoidea to discuss life through the lens of his Cystic Fibrosis. Opens with the short story "run|time" voiced by Michael and Hana Michels of Spark Creative Coaching. Features: Michael Swaim: https://twitter.com/SWAIM_CORP Cody Franks: https://www.leasthaunted.com/ Hana Michels: https://twitter.com/hanamichels Support Small Beans and access Additional Content: https://www.patreon.com/SmallBeans Check our store to buy Small Beans merch! https://www.teepublic.com/stores/the-small-beans-store?ref_id=22691

Michael brings on Brandon and Lisa, parents of two children (aged 1 and 3). Michael investigates the daily life and worries of the initial parenting phase. This episode continues the ongoing conversation about Michael and jenn’s leap into parenthood, including a huge announcement at the beginning of the pod! Buy Michael’s book: https://www.patreon.com/smallbeans/shop Support Small Beans: https://www.patreon.com/smallbeans Features: Michael Swaim: https://twitter.com/SWAIM_CORP Check our store to buy Small Beans merch! https://www.teepublic.com/stores/the-small-beans-store?ref_id=22691

Michael brings on Marina and Tom Reimann, expecting parents and personal friends. Marina and Tom are expecting any day now so this conversation consists of Michael asking them about their journey so far, as he begins his own. This episode continues the ongoing conversation about Michael and jenn’s leap into parenthood. The Go-Fund Me for Marina and Tom Reimann: https://www.gofundme.com/f/support-marinas-highrisk-pregnancy-journey Buy Michael’s book: https://www.patreon.com/smallbeans/shop Support Small Beans: https://www.patreon.com/smallbeans Features: Marina Reimann: https://twitch.tv/heartfistbrain Tom Reimann: https://twitter.com/startthemachine Michael Swaim: https://twitter.com/SWAIM_CORP Check our store to buy Small Beans merch! https://www.teepublic.com/stores/the-small-beans-store?ref_id=22691

Michael asks Abe Epperson, fellow Small Bean, to discuss his thoughts about starting a family. They discuss regret, happiness, and the anxiety of bringing a human into the world. Abe’s pretty satisfied with not having kids, but it’s always been on Michael’s list of life goals. Let’s see how these friends navigate the conversation from two different perspectives. Buy Michael’s book: https://www.patreon.com/smallbeans/shop Support Small Beans: https://www.patreon.com/smallbeans Features: Abe Epperson: https://twitter.com/abethemighty Michael Swaim: https://twitter.com/SWAIM_CORP Check our store to buy Small Beans merch! https://www.teepublic.com/stores/the-small-beans-store?ref_id=22691

Michael asks Adam Ganser, fellow Small Bean, to discuss his relationship with death. They discuss their faith and assumptions, and the development of death in their lives. There’s also some stories from the community that spark some further introspection. Buy Michael’s book: https://www.patreon.com/smallbeans/shop Support Small Beans: https://www.patreon.com/smallbeans Features: Adam Ganser: https://twitter.com/therealganz Michael Swaim: https://twitter.com/SWAIM_CORP Check our store to buy Small Beans merch! https://www.teepublic.com/stores/the-small-beans-store?ref_id=22691

In a never-ending quest to both sell books and ruin his own passions and pastimes, Michael Swaim has invited fellow author Jason Pargin (John Dies at the End, Zoey Ashe series) to break down all the hardest aspects of maintaining a career as a novelist, and learns lessons that apply to all of us, especially the ones with jobs or who want things. Buy Michael’s book: https://www.patreon.com/smallbeans/shop Support Small Beans: https://www.patreon.com/smallbeans Features: Jason Pargin: https://twitter.com/JasonKPargin Michael Swaim: https://twitter.com/SWAIM_CORP Check our store to buy Small Beans merch! https://www.teepublic.com/stores/the-small-beans-store?ref_id=22691

Check out our movie’s crowdfunding page and consider dropping some coin on our largest ambition YET: https://seedandspark.com/fund/papa-bear On a very special episode, writer/father/friend Soren Bowie sits in as host and invites Mike to explain why he was just out for a bit, and how his life was changed for the better by his experiences in a partial hospitalization program for people undergoing acute mental health challenges. We think this one could be extra-useful, so please give it a listen if you're on a healing journey, and because it starts with a kickass short story from Soren. The folder of useful documents and exercises referenced in the episode is available here, including Swaim's cast of internal characters (all Star Trek). https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1I2uTrCWc3on5rX60KReycLqFls-40JiK https://drive.google.com/file/d/1FD_rIriC7IhVmOiRVzoGjtGdTeCM2wZP/view The Jack Kornfield meditation mentioned is here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wZtgHd2gJLg Here are some other excellent meditations: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W8e_tAEM80k https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kv6HkipQcfA https://lifearchitect.com/ifs-guided-meditations/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1yQX1y7zMAg The book No Bad Parts by Richard Schwarz, considered the definitive text on Internal Family Systems/Parts Work, is available everywhere. Features: Soren Bowie: https://twitter.com/Soren_Ltd Michael Swaim: https://twitter.com/SWAIM_CORP Check our store to buy Small Beans merch! https://www.teepublic.com/stores/the-small-beans-store?ref_id=22691 Support Small Beans and access Additional Content: https://www.patreon.com/SmallBeans

In this episode of Tales, Michael invites friend Vanessa Guerrero to discuss their worst days they’ve ever had and how they dealt with it. The interview begins at 8:12. Features: Vanessa Guerrero: https://twitter.com/nessguerrero Michael Swaim: https://twitter.com/SWAIM_CORP Check our store to buy Small Beans merch! https://www.teepublic.com/stores/the-small-beans-store?ref_id=22691 Support Small Beans and access Additional Content: https://www.patreon.com/SmallBeans

In this episode of Tales, Michael invites friend and longtime collaborator Daniel O’Brien to discuss the healing properties of meditation and its role in both of their lives. Features: Daniel O’Brien: https://twitter.com/DOB_INC Michael Swaim: https://twitter.com/SWAIM_CORP Check our store to buy Small Beans merch! https://www.teepublic.com/stores/the-small-beans-store?ref_id=22691 Support Small Beans and access Additional Content: https://www.patreon.com/SmallBeans

In this episode of Tales, Michael invites musician and RAINN Speakers Bureau member Sammy Lynn into the Pit to discuss her experiences suffering and recovering from sexual assault, and share practical coping advice. If you or a loved one has survived such a despicable attack, please know that there is a community that supports you, even if you've yet to make contact with them. Take your time, feel what you need to feel, and stay with us. If it's the right time in your journey, please consider sharing your experience with a loved one, calling the National Sexual Assault Hotline or, if necessary, the Suicide Prevention Hotline. RAINN Sex Assault Hotline - 1-800-656-4673 National Suicide Prevention Lifeline - 1-800-273-8255 Features: Sammy Lynn: For more on Sammy and her music, visit https://www.samanthalynnmusic.com/ Michael Swaim: https://twitter.com/SWAIM_CORP Check our store to buy Small Beans merch! https://www.teepublic.com/stores/the-small-beans-store?ref_id=22691 Support Small Beans and access Additional Content: https://www.patreon.com/SmallBeans

The pit is back! Well, the podcast. Honestly, it’s been a while because things have been fairly positive in the lives of Michael Swaim and Katie Willert. It’s not all roses, but the two update us (and hopefully fellow addicts out there) how things are going now that they’re sober. No real trigger warnings this time: they discuss their relationship with addiction, what they’re struggling with, and what they’re not struggling with. More or less, it’s a positive reinforcement that anyone can make a choice to be better tomorrow and we here at Small Beans highly suggest it, even if there’s setbacks once in a while. Features: Katie Willert: https://twitter.com/katiewillertart Michael Swaim: https://twitter.com/SWAIM_CORP Check our store to buy Small Beans merch! https://www.teepublic.com/stores/the-small-beans-store?ref_id=22691 Support Small Beans and access Additional Content: https://www.patreon.com/SmallBeans

This episode’s guest is streamer, cosplayer, and podcaster: Marina Reimann! Per usual for the pit, we have a disclaimer. We cover being queer, feeling impostor syndrome because we're in monogamous long-term relationships, and a bit of our sexual histories, including Marina's assault and how she came back from that. Features: Marina Reimann: https://twitter.com/HeartFistBrain Michael Swaim: https://twitter.com/SWAIM_CORP Check our store to buy Small Beans merch! https://www.teepublic.com/stores/the-small-beans-store?ref_id=22691 Support Small Beans and access Additional Content: https://www.patreon.com/SmallBeans

Two of the warmest hosts to bless this podcast network take a moment to reflect on some of their coldest days. Both Michael Swaim and Cristian Ramirez have gone through divorces. Cristian, the more recent single, tells Michael about the hardships and eventual self-betterment involved in his experience. Michael in-kind reflects on his own behavior and past circumstances that made him the man he is today. It’s just two divorced guys, everyone. Features: Cristian Ramirez: https://twitter.com/FanboyCristian Michael Swaim: https://twitter.com/SWAIM_CORP Support Small Beans and access Additional Content: https://www.patreon.com/SmallBeans

Tales from the Pit returns with a COVID retrospective. Sitting down with Michael is Twitch Streamer, Creator, and Advocate Alebrelle. The two discuss what it’s been like during quarantine as an autistic and intersectional person. WARNING: there are lengthy discussions and specific examples each give about their depression and suicidal thoughts. Beware, all ye’ who enter here, thar be monsters. Everyone here is doing okay, and we hope you are too. Be well, everyone. Features: Alebrelle: https://www.twitch.tv/alebrelle Michael Swaim: https://twitter.com/SWAIM_CORP Support Small Beans and access Additional Content: https://www.patreon.com/SmallBeans

The pit returns with a special episode. Michael speaks to Jason Pargin, former executive editor of Cracked.com and the current head of video, Jordan Breeding, about self-worth and career success. This conversation was partially inspired by Jason Pargin’s recent video regarding making yourself valuable (https://youtu.be/wFBr685TjNs). When you’ve found yourself a value to others and you still haven’t reached the success you feel you’ve earned, what is the healthy way to proceed? Jason Pargin: https://twitter.com/JohnDiesattheEn Jordan Breeding: https://www.youtube.com/user/Cracked, https://twitter.com/The_J_Breeding Michael Swaim: https://twitter.com/SWAIM_CORP Support Small Beans and access Additional Content: https://www.patreon.com/SmallBeans

Katy Stoll and Cody Johnston discuss the unique hardships around running the Some More News series and Even More News podcast, jobs that require them to ingest All The News All The Time. If you're addicted to your news app, Cody's Showdy, or just stressed out, join us in the Pit and let's hug it out. Support Small Beans and access Additional Content: https://www.patreon.com/SmallBeans SB MERCH: https://smallbeans.bigcartel.com

Andy Bush (Picnicface, Cavendish, My Gorgeous Son) has a POWERTHIRST for creative fulfillment, but that doesn't mean he's always going to get the creatrilytes his art-glands crave. In fact, he's spent a fair amount of his creative journey failing upward, literally, from Los Angeles back to Canada, the final refuge of all showbiz cowards (SHOTS FIRED, JOHN CANDY'S CORPSE!). Anyway, two aspiring writers compare their imperfect journeys in a challenging field. Also, Michael presents a short story about aliens who steal language! Art by Seth Laster. Music by Abe Epperson, Kevin Clark and Kelsey Hudgins. Support Small Beans and access Additional Content: https://www.patreon.com/SmallBeans SB Merch: https://www.smallbeans.bigcartel.com

Griffin Rowell, Michael's oldest pal, joins him in the Pit to trace the shape of a friendship and hold fast to the weapons that help us ward off the darkness. Art by Seth Laster. Music by Abe Epperson. Support Small Beans and access Additional Content: https://www.patreon.com/SmallBeans SB Merch: https://smallbeans.bigcartel.com

Your sick host Michael Swaim is super-stoked to welcome tight guest Vanessa Gritton to discuss hella-pertinent issues like romance and dating through the lens of mental illness, addiction, and family drama. Support Small Beans and access Additional Content: https://www.patreon.com/SmallBeans

Jamie Loftus joins Michael in the Pit of Odiousness to discuss her dealings with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, the importance of wearing long sleeves at work, Lilo & Stitch merchandise, and how all of these things conspired to make her the hackstress she is t0d4y. Art by Seth Laster. Music by Abe Epperson and Kevin Clark.

Sage of Boning and Bodily Juices (also licensed Sex Therapist) Jamila Dawson returns to help explain what exactly she does, why kink and poly relationships are on the rise, and what to do when it all explodes in your face (and not in the good way). At the top, Michael ruins your mental image of him forever, and all future prospects of holding elected office.

Small Beans favorite Katie Willert stops in to discuss the long, hard road of trying to break into Hollywood, the many odd jobs she's taken in the interim, and how to appreciate what life gives you, even when it's not what you expected. Michael opens with a short story that lasts about forty-five minutes, in case you Skippers were wondering. Music by Kevin Clark and Abe Epperson. Art by Seth Laster.

Writer/comedian Talia Jane recounts her travails dealing with John Cheese (real name Mack Leighty), whom she helped to out as a serial sexual harasser and general creep this year, in spite of a startling lack of support from the systems we expect to support us through that type of thing. Wonder where all of Cheese's Cracked by-lines went? After hearing about Talia's shitty experiences and kickass responses in the face of those experiences, you won't anymore. Art by Seth Laster. Music by Abe Epperson and Kevin Clark.

Biba Pickles discusses art, battling bi-polar disorder, and covering her body with cereal and self-inflicted cigarette burns. It's a party! Art by Seth Laster. Music by Abe Epperson, Kelsey Hudgins and Kevin Clark.

Menendez Brothers trial juror Hazel Thornton, author of Hung Jury, stops by to discuss her time engaged with one of the most high-profile cases of the century. Topics include gender bias, political bias, and flow charts.

Bridgett Greenberg, co-host of Rough Stuff, takes a dose of her own medicine in The Pit and gets personal about her relationship to anxiety, panic attacks, and spinning tubes.

Those who plumb the Pit discuss the thin, sad line between grief and a bout of depression, practical ways to know when you're depressed, and practical ways to address it that you probably won't take advantage of while you're depressed, but hey, it was worth a shot. Maggie Mae Fish, host of My Top 8, joins to shed her light on these and a number of related topics.

One soldier's experience serving in the Army in Iraq, and, later and much more importantly, as one of the biggest Small Beans around. PCPD host and fixture Cristian Ramirez tries to explain to Mike what war is really like on this week's Tales from the Pit.

Katy Stoll returns to the Pit to discuss the loss of beloved pets, and why the heck we keep doing this to ourselves.

Tom Reimann of Gamefully Unemployed ventures to the deepest levels of the Pit, to help Swaim make some sense of the pains, absences, and stresses that sometimes make self-annihilation seem pretty damn appealing. That's right; it's the suicide episode. Tread softly and be brave. You are loved.

Pop Culture Petri Dish co-host and all around Big Bean Cristian Ramirez joins Mike in the pit to discuss parents, how they shape us (and don't), and tell some hilarious stories about coyotes and raccoons.

Soren Bowie joins Michael in the pit to discuss textbook teen angst, never being depressed, and the terrible burden of having a child.

Sex therapist and proudly kinky person Jamila Dawson stops by the Pit to explain some jargon to Michael and take some of the mystery out of healthful erotic exploration.

Katy and her pal Michael discuss her planned autobiography, "The Skinniest Kid at Fat Camp." Also life.

Lauren and Michael discuss overcoming paralysis, Brazilian waxing, and tuna noodle casserole.

Mike and his Mom tackle depression, trauma, and unfortunate technical errors.