The Danger of Emotional Concealment from a Male Clinician's Perspective

The Danger of Emotional Concealment from a Male Clinician's PerspectiveMy name is Charles Jones. I am a licensed clinical social worker. I currently work for Innovative Renal Care, a profit-oriented organization specializing in renal therapy (hemodialysis, Peritoneal dialysis, and home hemodialysis) for patients with end-stage renal disease. My role is to provide social services, including housing, transportation needs, health insurance coverage, patient-family support, and to resolve patient-patient, patient-staff, and staff-staff conflicts, and to advocate for patients’ needs. I provide brief counseling on an as-needed basis, but referrals are made to outpatient services for those in deep mental health crises, such as grief, hospice decision-making for end-of-life choices.In the past, I worked as an In-Home Therapist, mostly with children and high schoolers who struggled with conduct disorder, oppositional defiant disorder, anxiety, depression, separation anxiety, attachment disorder, substance use disorder in the family, domestic violence, marital conflict, grief and dying, and many other presenting issues. I am a current first-year DBH candidate at the Cummings Graduate Institute of Behavioral Studies. I am looking forward to completing the program so I can make positive impacts on our healthcare system.As a young boy growing up in an African home, my father always encouraged me to be strong, both physically and emotionally; to conceal or minimize emotional expression like sadness, worry, and vulnerability. My brothers and I were taught that expressing emotion as a male in an African home is being fearful, weak, vulnerable, and shameful, and it makes us feel rejected and eventually lose respect. We were taught to be strong in character and resilient, and to overcome challenges, regardless of the challenges and capabilities to endure the aftermath. Emotional suppression for most African men is a strength of the masculinity identity that is based solely on strength and action. Phrases like “boys don’t cry” or “be like a man” were used to encourage us to suck in the physical and emotional pain. This is the fabric ingrained in African culture, a fabric of strength and courage that is usually associated with wisdom, leadership, and making a positive impact, rather than showing emotional dysregulation. For us, Africans, strength is a sign of internal courage rooted in African culture's bravery but influenced by gender-role norms. As a clinician of color with a strong sense of emotional resilience ingrained in African roots, I try not to allow emotional claustrophobia to entrap me psychologically, regardless of the situation, whether it is job-related, a relationship problem, or a life situation in general. I keep pushing myself to withstand the feelings of fear, anxiety, and inadequacy so that I do not lose my autonomy and physical space as a male. But sometimes I get caught in situations that make me want to release the pent-up emotions. I either try to hide or ignore these unique emotional build-ups from listening to clients’ problems because I want to prioritize my strength and resiliency by repressing the emotional feelings of the job. This is dangerous and can lead to poor performance, emotional fatigue, burnout, secondary trauma, rigidity, lack of empathy, missing emotional cues, becoming detached, and creating a therapeutic absence from sessions at the time clients need me the most.