The Stay in the room Podcast

In this episode, we unpack the idea that your partner can be a mirror—reflecting the places you still feel tender, triggered, or unintegrated—and how an intimate relationship can become a powerful path for growth. We share a real, recent moment of “intense fellowship” where old patterns surfaced, projections got named, and we had to choose devotion to each other’s souls (not each other’s egos). If you’ve ever felt afraid of conflict or unsure how to stay present through hard conversations, we hope this helps you feel less alone—and more equipped to stay in the room.Key Takeaways* What it means for your partner to be a “mirror” (and where nuance matters)* How unspoken needs create distance and trigger insecurity* The difference between devotion to someone’s ego and devotion to their soul* Why conflict can be necessary for intimacy and growth* Recognizing projection—and taking responsibility for your triggers* Love as a daily practice, not just a feeling* How staying present increases your relational capacityRelated EpisodesEpisode 18: Foundations of Healthy Relationships with Leigh-Anne LoPintoEpisode 1: How Has Porn Affected Your Life?Episode 8: Our Recovery StoryResourcesHow to Be an AdultConscious LovingHeidi’s Group for Women Get full access to Jonathan/Heidi’s Substack at stayintheroom.substack.com/subscribe

In this episode, we kick off season two with a jam-packed interview with Leigh-Anne LoPinto. Leigh-Anne’s work is devoted to the new paradigm of relationships. For the past 15 years, she has worked with people 1:1 and in groups to support healing and growth through relationships as a psychologist, breathwork teacher, and relationship advisor. She clearly sees, knows, and lives this path, understanding the terrain and pure potential that it holds as the key to the evolution of humanity.We cover the foundational skills and tools that everyone needs for healthy and dynamic relationships, and why this is what we are all being called to at this time. If you’ve ever sensed there’s “more” available in your relationship but didn’t know where to start, this episode offers both vision and practical next steps.This is a profound way for us to start season 2, with such a powerful voice in the realm of relationships, and we can’t wait for you to listen!Resources Mentioned in This Episode:Conscious Loving (book recommendation)Lynne Forrest’s work on the Drama Triangle (victim–rescuer–persecutor)Leigh-Anne LoPinto’s “Start Here” page, free resources including:Secure attachment teaching + quick assessmentCodependency teaching video (approx. 2.5 hours)Leigh-Anne’s YouTube ChannelWant to Connect?Subscribe to our Substack for reflections, bonus content, and deeper insights:Follow us on Instagram: @stayintheroompodcastSend us your questions or feedback at [email protected] Thoughts:If you’ve been telling yourself “it’s fine,” but deep down you know you’re craving something truer—more connected, more honest, more alive—this episode is a beautiful place to begin. Relationships aren’t meant to be a performance or a power struggle. They can be a mirror, a teacher, and a path of healing. You don’t have to overhaul your whole life overnight—start with one small step, one honest reflection, one brave conversation. Thank you for staying in the room with us.We’d Love to Hear from You!What resonated most with you from this episode? Let us know in the comments, send us an email, or DM us on Instagram—we love hearing from our listeners. Get full access to Jonathan/Heidi’s Substack at stayintheroom.substack.com/subscribe

Episode SummaryIn this episode, Jonathan interviews Heidi about her upcoming adventure—competing on Write or Flight, the first-ever reality TV show for memoir writers. Heidi shares how she was selected to join nine writers from around the world in Cusco, Peru, where they’ll live together, go on adventures, and compete in memoir-writing challenges.More than a competition, this journey is about reclaiming joy, leaning into vulnerability, and stepping into a long-awaited adventure. Heidi opens up about overcoming imposter syndrome, the challenges of being on camera, and why this experience feels like a soul reclamation.Key Takeaways* What Write or Flight is and how Heidi got selected* Why memoir writing is so personal and powerful* The mindset shift from “winning” to embracing the journey* How saying “yes” to adventure is changing Heidi’s story* Letting go of validation and trusting your creative pathRelated Episodes* Episode 14: Faith and Dyslexia: Learning Differently, Living Fully* Episode 13: When Church Hurts: Wolves, Wounds, and the Path to HealingResources* Write or Flight Reality Show* The Memoir Engineering System: Make Your First Draft Your Final Draft by Wendy Dale* Avoiding Prison and Other Noble Vacation Goals: Adventures in Love and Danger by Wendy Dale* Heidi's Substack: @stayintheroomConnect with UsEmail: [email protected]: @the_stayintheroompodcastDisclaimerThis episode covers themes of vulnerability, creative risks, and personal transformation. Listener discretion advised. Get full access to Jonathan/Heidi’s Substack at stayintheroom.substack.com/subscribe

Episode Summary:In this special family episode, we’re joined by our daughter Faith to talk candidly about her experience living—and thriving—with dyslexia. Faith shares what it was like to be diagnosed later in childhood, how it shaped her relationship with learning, and the emotional journey of navigating a world that often misunderstands invisible disabilities.With honesty, humor, and insight beyond her years, Faith opens up about her academic struggles, what helped her fall in love with reading and writing, and how dyslexia shaped her empathy, creativity, and determination. This is a conversation for anyone supporting a neurodivergent child, navigating learning differences themselves, or simply seeking to understand how the brain can work differently—and brilliantly.Key Takeaways* What it feels like to grow up with an undiagnosed learning disability* How getting identified with dyslexia brought relief, language, and direction* Why audio books (“ear reading”) and tech tools are game-changers* The emotional toll of feeling behind—and how to reframe that story* How self-advocacy, humor, and creativity helped Faith reclaim her voice* Why calling it a disability can be powerful, not shameful* The importance of validation and support in a world that rewards conformityLink Back to Previous Episodes:Episode 6: Demon Hunting: How Hyper-Vigilance Kept Us in Fear – Exploring fear-based systems and the pressure to performEpisode 13: When Church Hurts: Wolves, Wounds, and the Path to Healing – Creating safety and healing after being misunderstoodResources & Mentions* The Dyslexia Empowerment Plan by Ben Foss* Speechify Connect with Us:Email us: [email protected] on Instagram: @the_stayintheroompodcastShare your thoughts or submit questions for future episodes!Disclaimer:This episode includes open conversations about invisible disabilities, neurodivergence, and educational challenges. Listener discretion is advised for those navigating sensitive experiences with learning differences. Get full access to Jonathan/Heidi’s Substack at stayintheroom.substack.com/subscribe

Episode Summary This episode goes deep. We’re joined by longtime friend, pastor, and adoption advocate Randy Bohlender for a raw and timely conversation about spiritual abuse, leadership failures, and how to keep your faith intact after being wounded by the church.Randy brings both pastoral wisdom and personal reflection to the table as we talk about the difference between flawed leaders and dangerous ones—what it means to identify “wolves in the church,” and why some communities enable harmful behavior in the name of ministry success.We explore hard questions about complicity, spiritual bypassing, and the fallout of trusting institutions more than the people they’re meant to serve. Randy shares candidly about his own journey of healing, growth, and learning to name what’s true—even when it’s painful.If you’ve ever wrestled with church hurt, spiritual disillusionment, or how to rebuild trust in faith spaces, this conversation is for you.Key Takeaways* How to spot spiritual abuse and power dynamics in church leadership* Why good fruit doesn’t cancel out harmful roots* The dangers of idolizing leaders and minimizing harm* What it looks like to stay in the room without staying silent* Steps toward healing when you’ve been hurt by the church* The difference between agreement and validation in walking with others Link Back to Previous Episodes Episode 6: Demon Hunting: How Hyper-Vigilance Kept Us in Fear – When fear masquerades as faith Episode 2: The Partner’s Perspective – Heidi’s story of healing from relational and spiritual traumaLinks Email us: [email protected] Follow us on Instagram: @the_stayintheroompodcast Learn more about Zoe’s House Adoption Agency: Zoe’s House Follow Randy on X: @RBohlenderDisclaimer This episode includes honest discussions about spiritual abuse and church trauma. Listener discretion is advised. Side effects may include reflection, clarity, and a renewed desire for truth, accountability, and wholeness. Get full access to Jonathan/Heidi’s Substack at stayintheroom.substack.com/subscribe

 Episode Summary In this honest and reflective episode, Heidi shares the story behind one of her most impactful breakups—her slow, quiet, and deeply personal decision to walk away from alcohol. What began as a memoir-style Substack article turns into a vulnerable conversation about what it means to examine a culturally accepted habit that no longer aligns with your values, health, or intuition.Heidi discusses how drinking became a normalized part of adulthood, how it was used to numb stress and emotion, and how the “sober curious” movement offered a nonjudgmental space for change. She opens up about the subtle (but powerful) physical, emotional, and relational toll alcohol had on her life—and how listening to her body, nervous system, and inner wisdom ultimately led her to say goodbye.Key Takeaways* Why you don’t have to hit rock bottom to reevaluate your drinking* How alcohol can dull intuition, increase stress, and create internal misalignment* The social and emotional conditioning we carry around alcohol use* The power of curiosity, body awareness, and truth-telling in healing* What it means to be “Sunshine Sober” and live a more vibrant, present lifeResources Mentioned in This Episode* Heidi’s essay on Substack: A Glass Half Empty – Leaving My Most Abusive Relationship* This Naked Mind by Annie Grace* The Unexpected Joy of Being Sober: Catherine Gray* Brainspotting, breathwork, and nervous system regulation as healing toolsConnect with Us Follow us on Instagram: @the_stayintheroompodcast Share your thoughts or submit questions for future episodes: [Submit Here]Disclaimer: This episode includes sensitive discussions around substance use and emotional health. Listener discretion is advised. Get full access to Jonathan/Heidi’s Substack at stayintheroom.substack.com/subscribe

Episode Summary:In this raw and relatable episode, we explore the dynamics of codependence, independence, and interdependence in relationships. Drawing from their 20+ years of marriage and personal recovery work, Jonathan and Heidi Mills unpack how codependent behaviors often stem from trauma, family systems, and social conditioning—especially for women of faith.This conversation is full of insight for anyone navigating relationship struggles, people-pleasing tendencies, or a loss of identity within partnership. With compassion and honesty, Jonathan and Heidi discuss how to reclaim your sense of self, set healthy boundaries, and cultivate true interdependence without swinging to hyper-independence.What We Cover in This Episode:* The origins of codependency and how it evolved beyond addiction recovery* Signs of codependent behavior in marriage, parenting, friendships, and faith communities* How trauma and family of origin shape our relational patterns* The difference between codependence, independence, and interdependence, and interdependence* Why truth-telling is essential for healing and deeper connection* How codependency can hinder your partner’s growth and your own* How to disrupt dysfunctional cycles with empathy, boundaries, and personal responsibilityResources Mentioned in This Episode:* The Best of You by Dr. Alison CookWant to Connect?Subscribe to our Substack for reflections, bonus content, and deeper insights:Follow us on Instagram: @stayintheroompodcastSend us your questions or feedback at [email protected] Thoughts:If you’re feeling lost in your relationships, constantly over-functioning, or struggling to find your voice—this episode is for you. Recovery from codependence doesn’t happen overnight, but it is possible. Learning to honor your true self is not selfish—it’s sacred. Thank you for staying in the room with us.We’d Love to Hear from You!What resonated most with you from this episode? Let us know in the comments, send us an email, or DM us on Instagram—we love hearing from our listeners. Get full access to Jonathan/Heidi’s Substack at stayintheroom.substack.com/subscribe

Episode Summary:In this eye-opening episode, we dive into the complexities of neurodivergence with our guest, Rebecca Armstead. Rebecca shares her deeply personal journey of discovering her neurodivergence later in life and how it shaped her experiences, relationships, and career. We explore the impact of late diagnosis, the challenges of masking, and the importance of embracing one’s authentic self. Whether you’ve personally experienced neurodivergence or want to better understand and support those who have, this conversation is packed with valuable insights and wisdom.What We Cover in This Episode:* Rebecca’s personal journey of overcoming trauma and years of undiagnosed neurodivergence* The experience of being diagnosed later in life and how that changed her perspective* How masking neurodivergence, particularly in women, can lead to burnout and self-medicating behaviors* The common misconceptions around ADHD, autism, and late-life diagnoses* The importance of understanding neurodivergence in relationships and how partners can offer support* Strategies for self-advocacy, emotional resilience, and building a fulfilling life while embracing neurodivergence* The dangers of high-masking and the toll it takes on mental and emotional healthHow to navigate a neurodivergent diagnosis as an adult and where to seek supportResources Mentioned in This Episode:* Rebecca’s Burnout Journal & Coloring Books – Available on AmazonFind * Rebecca at Rise Leadership LLCWant to Connect?* Subscribe to our Substack for deeper insights, behind-the-scenes conversations, and extra content: [Join Us Here]* Follow us on Instagram: @stayintheroompodcast * Have a question or a topic you’d like us to explore? * Send us a message at [email protected]—we’d love to hear from you! Final Thoughts:This episode sheds light on the often-overlooked challenges of late-diagnosed neurodivergence. Recovery, growth, and self-acceptance are possible, but it takes time, patience, and support. If you’re navigating neurodivergence, know that you are not alone. Thank you for staying in the room with us.We’d Love to Hear from You!What resonated most with you from this episode? Let us know in the comments or send us a message—we love hearing from our listeners. Get full access to Jonathan/Heidi’s Substack at stayintheroom.substack.com/subscribe

Episode Summary:What happens when prayer alone isn’t enough? Coming from a charismatic faith background, we were taught that prayer could fix everything. But through life, loss, and healing, we’ve realized that transformation often requires more. In this episode, we explore the tension between faith and action, share our struggles with spiritual bypassing, and navigate the messy middle of reconstructing belief.What We Cover in This Episode:* How we were taught to believe prayer was the answer to everything* The role of prayer in addiction and recovery* Why deep healing requires more than just a spiritual approach* The impact of deconstruction on our faith and beliefs* Personal stories of grief, loss, and the shifting nature of faith* How prayer was weaponized in healing and deliverance ministries* The dangers of spiritual bypassing and minimizing real issues* Learning to embrace uncertainty and faith in the messy middleResources Mentioned in This Episode:* Spiritual Bypassing – Episode 7* Dr. Dan Allender – Thoughts on Wrestling with God * Our Recovery Story – Episode 8Want to Connect?* Subscribe to our Substack for deeper insights, personal reflections, and community engagement: Join Us Here* Follow us on Instagram: @stayintheroompodcast* Have questions or thoughts? Drop us a message—we love hearing from you!Final Thoughts:This episode is all about embracing the complexity of faith. We don't have all the answers, but we are committed to asking the hard questions, sharing our journey, and walking alongside those who are navigating similar struggles. Thank you for staying in the room with us.We’d Love to Hear from You!What resonated most with you from this episode? Let us know in the comments or send us a message—we love hearing from our listeners. Get full access to Jonathan/Heidi’s Substack at stayintheroom.substack.com/subscribe

Episode Summary:In this deeply personal episode, we finally share the story we’ve been alluding to over the past several episodes—our journey of recovery after betrayal. We open up about the hardest season of our marriage, the process we went through to heal, and what we learned along the way. This conversation isn’t about assigning blame or telling "our side" of the story; it’s about sharing the truth of what it took to rebuild trust, grow individually, and create a stronger, healthier marriage. If infidelity or betrayal is part of your story, please listen with care. This episode may bring up strong emotions, so take it at your own pace.What We Cover in This Episode:* The timeline of our betrayal and recovery process* Understanding discovery day and the impact of drip disclosure* The painful but necessary process of full therapeutic disclosure* The role of truth and transparency in rebuilding trust* Why safety is the first step in recovery* The importance of accountability and consistent effort* How we navigated minimizing, gaslighting, and self-protection* How our healing journey led to post-traumatic growth* The pivotal moment that changed everything* What life looks like now on the other side of healingResources Mentioned in This Episode:Dr. Jake Porter – Betrayal Trauma ResourcesDan Drake’s Intimacy PyramidDr. Andrew Bauman – Interview on Episode 6Want to Connect?* Subscribe to our Substack for deeper insights, behind-the-scenes conversations, and extra content: Join Us Here* Follow us on Instagram: @stayintheroompodcast* Have a question or a topic you’d like us to explore? Send us a message—we’d love to hear from you!Final Thoughts:This episode is raw, vulnerable, and filled with hard-earned wisdom. Recovery is possible, but it requires deep work, commitment, and a willingness to face the truth. If you’re on this journey, you’re not alone. Healing takes time, but there is hope. Thank you for being here with us.We’d Love to Hear from You!What resonated most with you from this episode? Let us know in the comments or send us a message—we love hearing from our listeners. Get full access to Jonathan/Heidi’s Substack at stayintheroom.substack.com/subscribe

 Episode SummaryFor years, we lived in a mindset where every struggle, every emotion, every obstacle had an enemy behind it. If something went wrong, we had to pray harder, fight spiritual battles, and stay on high alert. But here’s what we’ve learned—living in constant warfare mode isn’t freedom. It’s fear.In this vulnerable episode, we dive into our personal experiences with deliverance ministry, the harm that hyper-vigilance caused in our lives, and how shifting away from “demon hunting” has changed everything. We open up about the raw and real pieces of our story—what led us to question this mindset, the emotional toll it took, and the peace we found when we stopped seeing an enemy around every corner.If you’ve ever felt trapped in fear-based spirituality, if you’ve questioned whether deliverance culture is actually bringing freedom, or if you’re in the process of deconstructing hyper-vigilance in your own life—this episode is for you.Key Takeaways* How deliverance ministry shaped our worldview.* The dangers of hyper-vigilance: When everything is spiritual warfare, nothing feels safe.* The emotional and mental toll of constantly looking for an enemy.* How we’ve shifted from fear-based spirituality to a more grounded, peaceful faith.Link Back to Previous Episodes* Episode 1: How Has Porn Affected Your Life? – Jonathan’s story of overcoming addiction and healing.* Episode 5: Spiritual Bypassing: Why It’s Keeping You Stuck – Avoiding emotions by over-spiritualizing struggles.Links* Email us: [email protected].* Accountable2You software: a2u.app/stayintheroom* Follow us on Instagram: @the_stayintheroompodcast.* Share your thoughts or submit questions for future episodes!DisclaimerThis episode may challenge deeply held beliefs. Side effects may include relief, self-reflection, and a sudden decrease in unnecessary spiritual battles. Listen with curiosity. Get full access to Jonathan/Heidi’s Substack at stayintheroom.substack.com/subscribe

Episode SummaryFor too long, the church has used forgiveness as a weapon—silencing victims, protecting abusers, and demanding reconciliation without accountability. And when it comes to God’s gender, why has the church clung so tightly to a masculine image? What’s at stake in how we see God?In this powerful episode, we sit down with Dr. Andrew Bauman, therapist, advocate, and author of Safe Church: How to Guard Against Sexism and Abuse in Christian Communities. Together, we tackle the toxic theology of weaponized forgiveness, the deeply ingrained sexism within church culture, and how our view of God shapes power dynamics in faith communities.This conversation is raw, unfiltered, and deeply challenging. But to build safe, healthy faith spaces, we must be willing to confront the hard truths.Trigger Warning: This episode contains discussions of abuse and trauma in faith spaces. Listener discretion is advised.Key Takeaways* Weaponized forgiveness: How the church uses “forgiveness” to silence survivors.* Is God a man? Why gendered theology matters more than you think.* How sexism operates in faith spaces (and how to unlearn it).* What ACTUALLY makes a church safe for the vulnerable?About Our GuestDr. Andrew J. Bauman is a licensed mental health counselor and Founder & Director of the Christian Counseling Center: For Sexual Health & Trauma (CCC). He holds a Doctorate from Northeastern University, where he researched the impact of sexism and abuse on women in the Protestant Church.Books by Dr. Bauman:* Safe Church: How to Guard Against Sexism and Abuse in Christian Communities (Newest Release)* Other Works by Dr. BaumanMore from Dr. Bauman:* Christian Counseling Center for Sexual Health & Trauma* Dr. Bauman’s blog: The Healthy Man* Follow Andrew on Social MediaLink Back to Previous Episodes* Episode 5: Spiritual Bypassing: Why It’s Keeping You Stuck – How over-spiritualizing struggles keep us from real healing. Links* Email us: [email protected].* Accountable2You software: a2u.app/stayintheroom* Follow us on Instagram: @the_stayintheroompodcast.* Subscribe on Substack!: https://substack.com/@stayintheroom* Share your thoughts or submit questions for future episodes! Get full access to Jonathan/Heidi’s Substack at stayintheroom.substack.com/subscribe

 Episode SummaryEver heard phrases like, “Just pray about it,” or “Everything happens for a reason” when you’re struggling? While well-intended, this is often spiritual bypassing—using faith, positivity, or “higher thinking” to avoid dealing with real emotions. And here’s the problem: when we bypass pain, we also bypass healing.In this episode, we’re breaking down why spiritual bypassing is a problem, how it keeps us from true emotional growth, and what it looks like to process emotions in a way that actually leads to healing. We’re sharing our own experiences with unlearning this mindset, the impact it had on our relationships, and how we’re learning to hold space for discomfort instead of running from it.If you've ever been told to “just let it go” instead of being allowed to grieve, or felt pressured to "stay positive" instead of sitting with your emotions—this episode is for you. Key Takeaways* What is spiritual bypassing? The ways we use faith, positivity, or "good vibes only" to avoid hard emotions.* How it cripples emotional growth: Why bypassing pain prevents healing and deeper self-awareness.* Signs you might be spiritually bypassing: Common phrases, beliefs, and behaviors to watch for.* How to actually heal: Healthy alternatives that foster emotional processing, growth, and deeper connection. Link Back to Previous Episodes* Episode 1: How Has Porn Affected Your Life? – Jonathan’s story of overcoming addiction and healing.* Episode 4: Breaking Free from Hustle Culture – Slowing down and redefining success beyond busyness.Links* Email us: [email protected].* Accountable2You software: a2u.app/stayintheroom* Follow us on Instagram: @the_stayintheroompodcast.* Subscribe to our Substack: https://substack.com/@stayintheroom* Share your thoughts or submit questions for future episodes!DisclaimerThis episode may challenge long-held beliefs about faith, emotions, and healing. Side effects include increased self-awareness, emotional depth, and a sudden urge to process your feelings instead of suppressing them. Listen with an open heart. Get full access to Jonathan/Heidi’s Substack at stayintheroom.substack.com/subscribe

 Episode SummaryIs “busy” your default answer to how you’re doing? In this episode, we tackle the pervasive mindset of hustle culture and the way society has turned busyness into a status symbol. Drawing from our own experiences, we share how we’ve deprogrammed from the constant grind and shifted toward a more intentional and balanced way of living.We explore the harmful narratives around productivity, the toll it takes on mental and emotional health, and practical steps you can take to embrace a new rhythm of life—one that prioritizes rest, connection, and purpose. If you’ve ever felt like you’re running on a treadmill you can’t get off, this episode is for you. Key Takeaways* The Lies of Hustle Culture: How society equates busyness with success and worth.* The Emotional Cost: The toll perpetual productivity takes on mental health, relationships, and personal growth.* Shifting the Narrative: How to redefine success and stop using “busy” as a badge of honor.* Practical Changes: Steps we’ve taken to embrace rest, set boundaries, and live more intentionally.Resources Mentioned in This Episode* Soul Care 75 Group Soul Care 75 Journal – A guided approach to cultivating intentional rest and self-care in your daily life.* Calm the Chaos: Nervous System Foundations – Learn the basic foundations of regulating your nervous system for emotional and mental well-being.* Widen the Window by Dr Elizabeth Stanley- A groundbreaking book on stress, trauma, and how to build resilience in the face of life's challenges.* Dare to Lead by Brené Brown – A powerful book on courageous leadership and vulnerability.* The 4-Hour Workweek by Tim Ferriss – Insights and strategies for breaking free from the 9-to-5 grind and creating a life you love. Link Back to Previous Episodes* Episode 1: How Has Porn Affected Your Life? Jonathan opens up about his journey with pornography and the deeper issues behind the behavior.* Episode 2:The Partner’s Perspective Heidi shares her perspective on the impact of pornography and her road to healing.* Episode 3: What Does It Mean to Stay in the Room? Exploring the values that define “staying in the room” and what it doesn’t look like.Connect with UsEmail us: [email protected] us on Instagram: @the_stayintheroompodcast.Share your thoughts or submit questions for future episodes!DisclaimerWarning: Listening to this episode may result in reduced stress, spontaneous naps, and a newfound appreciation for the art of doing less. Side effects could include rethinking your “busy is better” mantra and laughing so hard you forget to check your email. Proceed with caution—and maybe a cup of tea. Get full access to Jonathan/Heidi’s Substack at stayintheroom.substack.com/subscribe

What does it really mean to “stay in the room”? In this episode, we’re unpacking the heart behind the phrase and what it looks like in real life—and what it doesn’t. We share the values that guide us, like truth-telling, kindness, honor, and mutual commitment and dive into how we’ve learned to live those values in tough conversations.This episode is full of real talk, laughter, and honest reflections about the messy moments when staying in the room didn’t look like it should. Whether you’re working on a relationship, navigating conflict, or simply trying to show up better for yourself, this episode is all about staying present, grounded, and committed.Key Takeaways* What “Stay in the Room” Is: A commitment to showing up with truth, kindness, honor, and mutual respect—even when it’s hard.* What “Stay in the Room” Isn’t: It’s not enabling bad behavior, staying in unhealthy dynamics, or avoiding accountability.* The role of laughter and grace in navigating hard conversations.* Why values like mutual commitment and truth-telling are non-negotiable for growth.Link Back to Previous Episodes* Episode 1: How Has Porn Affected Your Life?Jonathan shares his journey with pornography, unpacking the deeper problem and the road to recovery.* Episode 2: The Partner’s PerspectiveHeidi shares her side of the story, including the emotional and relational impact, and the journey toward healing.Connect with Us* Email us: [email protected]* Follow us on Instagram:@the_stayintheroompodcast * Share your questions and topic ideas for future episodes!DisclaimerThis episode contains honest conversations and reflections that may challenge preconceived ideas about relationships and communication. Listener discretion is advised. Get full access to Jonathan/Heidi’s Substack at stayintheroom.substack.com/subscribe

 Episode Summary:In this deeply personal follow-up to Episode 1, Heidi shares her side of the story—how pornography affected her life, her marriage, and her sense of self. Through raw and vulnerable reflections, Heidi dives into the emotional, relational, and mental toll pornography took on her and the journey she’s been on to reclaim her story. She unpacks the false beliefs she had to confront, the impact on her identity, and the steps she’s taken toward healing and restoration. This episode is for anyone navigating the ripple effects of addiction in their relationships and seeking a way forward.Key Takeaways:* The emotional impact of pornography on partners and relationships.* Confronting false beliefs about worth, identity, and comparison.* The importance of creating safety for honest conversations.* Steps for rebuilding trust and fostering personal and relational healing.Related Episode: Episode 1: “How Has Porn Affected Your Life?”.Connect with Us:* Email us: [email protected]. * Share your thoughts or submit questions for future episodes: Submit Here.* Follow us on Instagram: @the_StayInTheRoomPodcast. Disclaimer: This episode discusses sensitive topics, including pornography and its impact on relationships. Listener discretion is advised. Get full access to Jonathan/Heidi’s Substack at stayintheroom.substack.com/subscribe

 Episode Summary:In our debut episode, Heidi takes on the role of interviewer as Jonathan shares his deeply personal journey with pornography. Together, we dive into the real problem behind porn (hint: it’s not what you think) and unpack the road to recovery. Along the way, Jonathan shares the false beliefs he had to deconstruct, the emotional and relational impact, and the tools he’s found most helpful in rebuilding his life and relationships. This episode is about more than just a conversation—it’s an invitation to lean into the tough topics and start the work of healing. Key Takeaways: * The real problem behind porn—it’s deeper than just the behavior.* How false beliefs around identity, shame, and control can fuel the cycle.* The role of safety, honesty, and emotional healing in recovery.* Practical steps for addressing addiction and rebuilding trust. Resources Mentioned in This Episode:Resource: Fight the New Drug, Life UnpluggedRelated Episode: [Coming Soon: Part 2: Heidi’s Side.]Our Substack: Stay in the Room PodcastConnect with Us:Email us: [email protected] us on Instagram: @The_StayInTheRoomPodcast Disclaimer: This episode discusses sensitive topics, including pornography and its impact on relationships. Listener discretion is advised. Get full access to Jonathan/Heidi’s Substack at stayintheroom.substack.com/subscribe