Two Drink Minimum Commentaries

The Torchy’s boys are back after a long absence to ride, do some hard drugs and reminisce with a legendary gunfighter. We join Bill, Jane and array of Walter Hill regulars as he struggles to keep a hold on his addictions, his women, his struggling eyesight and his past catching up to him. This features Jeff Bridges as the titular Wild Bill, Ellen Barkin, James Gammon, David Arquette, John Hurt and James Remar. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

iris and Gary sit down with some skunk beer and some fried chicken to tell a tale about deplorable people. After a family hires a crooked cop to kill a hated relative, they endure psychological and physical trauma all in the pursuit of minimal riches and a whole lot of tragedy. Matthew Mcconaughey, Juno Temple and Emile Hirsh stars in William Friedkin’s Killer Joe. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Ricky and Gary were late to release this one because we have been getting our chakras in order. We have been training hard with these crazy monks learning our ball handling skills. When a rag tag team of former monks get an opportunity at glory on the soccer field, they use their mystical powers to battle the opposition and beat Team Evil in gravity defying fashion. This stars the great Steven Chow who is the star of Kung Fu Hustle. Put on your busted cleats and light your smoke. No red cards allowed in this match. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Iris, Suzanne and Gary are back and we’re feeling furry with excitement. On this one, we talk about the horned up exploits of sexy shapeshifters. When a troubled couple go hang with other white folks in the woods, they soon discover that their getaway houses a legion of werewolves in The Howling. Next up, you get horned up cat people looking for love and life forces in the Stephen King scribed Mick Garris directed Sleepwalkers. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Cameron and Gary are on this one and they tackle a gem here. Typical story. Family goes out into space and finds a wreckage. They take on the last survivor who they nurse back to life. Little do they know that their new boarder is looking for love and possibly a whole lot of bloodshed. Richard Grieco, Corbin Bernsen and Edie McClurg star in this installment of Roger Corman’s long line of horror and sci-fi films he did for Showtime. Take your protein pills and put your condom on. It’s gonna get weird. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

The Torchy’s boys are back and we are riding side saddle with a true native legend. This is a mostly true retelling of Geronimo and his Apache people’s surrender to the US Government and the struggle of both sides through battles and constant mistrust. Wes Studi, Gene Hackman, Jason Patric, Matt Damon and Robert Duvall in Mr. Hill’s decent attempt at an epic featuring writing credits by John Milius and an accompanying epic score by Ry Cooter. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Suzanne and Gary are back after an unwanted hiatus to bring you two reviews of films that are completely different. It’s a favorite things episode. First up, we dive into the devil’s goo with John Carpenter’s take on theology and the science that may bring on the end of the world with Prince of Darkness. 20 years later, we needed a hero and that hero will wear a cape and ride a motorbike. We cover Hot Rod from 2007. Glad to be back, beefers. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Original Cinema Quad Poster – Movie Film PostersThe Torchy’s boys are back and we are traveling in search of riches and some ghetto shenanigans. Walter Hill takes us on a journey to East St. Louis where two firefighters are hoping to strike it rich. They get ahold of a map that leads them to an old factory and some high powered gangstas. Will they escape with the gold or lose their heads? William Sadler, Bill Paxton, Ice-T, Ice Cube and our favorite Art Evans star in Trespass from 1992.  ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Join Gary Hill and Ricky Morgan (Doctor Movie) for another feature discussion where we had to gather our wits and banter to discuss this underseen tournament fighting movie. When Alex gets booted out of the fencing community for accidently killing a guy, he is recruited by a mystery man to fight in Ring Of Steel which is an underground sword fighting league where they fight to the death. Sometimes. Look for it for free on YouTube. Next up, we are going Italian Mad Max ripoff with 2020 Texas Gladiators! ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

The Torchy’s boys are riding with Jack and Reggie once again. This time they have 48 hours to figure who a drug lord is while dodging shady businessmen, shady women and a ruthless biker gang led by Andrew Divoff. Head over to the Legion Patreon for more goodies!!! ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Iris and Gary are back again. This time to talk corruption, sexual assault, lady mullets, deviant lesbian lifestyles, filthy aquarium water, shower etiquette and two of the greatest genre casts ever assembled. We celebrate Raquel Welch with Hannie Caulder featuring Ernest Borgnine, Strother Martin, Jack Elam and Christopher Lee. Then, we celebrate Stella Stevens with one of exploitation jams in Chained Heat featuring Linda Blair, Sybil Danning, John Vernon, John Vernon’s fuck palace, Henry Silva, Tamara Dobson and many more naked naked things. Both of these featured actresses recently passed and left a legacy of great credits. Dive into the hot tub and join us. Don’t mind the ring around the rim. It’s just the warden’s seasoning. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

The Torchy’s boys are back and we are going under the knife to get some revenge. When Johnny is double crossed in a robbery, he is coaxed into rehabilitation and some major surgery. Now with a new identity, Johnny is after his betrayers with a ruthless lawman on his back. Scott Wilson, Morgan Freeman and one of the best and most sleeveless Lance Henriksen also star in Johnny Handsome. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

This is the first in a series of reviews to ramp up the Fleas and Flicks Charity Auction coming this weekend. We are doing that by reviewing a bunch of Disney animal classics. First up, when a psychic feline is stranded on earth, it is up to two scientists and a beer guzzling friend to prep his ship and get him home while avoiding the government and a genuine super villain. Jake is The Cat From Outer Space! ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Iris and I get together to do two films with one thing in common. They have two characters called Little Bill. Hence the title. See what we did there. We cover a late but great western from Clint Eastwood featuring Gene Hackman as the dastardly sheriff of Big Whisky in Unforgiven and we talk about sad horny and high dudes and one lonely cameraman with a whorish wife in Paul Thomas Anderson’s Boogie Nights. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Iris and Gary are back with the beef and we’re headed into your frontal lobes for two films where people literally get into each others heads. Subconsciously of course. We cover 1984’s Dreamscape featuring Dennis Quaid, Max Von Sydow and Christopher Plummer. We chase that with J-Lo invading the mind of a tortured killer in The Cell from 2000. The audio is a little wonky on this so bear with us. Keep calm and beef on! ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Gary and Suzanne are blessed to be joined by special guests Cort Psyops, Derek Bourgeois, Ricky Morgan and Jeffery Martin to close out the last show of the our trio of shows celebrating our 9th year of podcasting. Join us for the last two Christopher Guest reviews, a crippled theater featuring a lame robot and gang violence and X’s and my evaluation of flawed men and the folly of early 90s alt bands. The beef is stuffed. Dig in! ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

The boys are back to liven up your weekend when we travel to Mills Basin with the Black Roses. When a small town is graced with the presence of an up and coming band, all the kids in town start to get horny and a little big homicidal. They are under the influence of rock and roll and some gnarly demons. It’s up to one teacher to save the kids with some poetry, sweater logic and good old fashioned Canadian road flares. This is John Fasano’s Black Roses. Stream along with us. As of this release, it is on Shudder. SUBMIT TO DAMIEN!!!!!!! ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Lee Russell is back on the beef to bring you our long awaited and half-assed attempt to follow-up our tribute to fine character actor Michael J. Pollard. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

The two drink crew is back from a long hiatus with one we recorded a while ago. This one is hard to explain. Watch it for psychics, telekinetic tykes, wild birds, space Jesus and more! You get all this and more with The Visitor. Watch along with us and maybe you can tell us what the plot is. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

The beef crew is back and it’s gonna get uncomfortable. We are covering two films where ghosts do unsavory things to women with The Legend of Hell House and The Entity. We are glad to be back for sure. Thanks for your support. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

The Torchy’s boys are back and they are hitting Chicago but doing it the Solviet way. We join Arnold Schwarzenegger who is thrust from his homeland and into the windy city to get the psycho who killed his partner and is threatening to take his drug ring to both shores. Did I mention he has to team up with a meatball Chicago cop played by Jim Belushi. Join us as we discuss this delightful culture clash with that Walter Hill flavor that we know and love. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Cinema Beef is back to give you a morsel of the chicken persuasion. Cameron and Gary discuss Monte Hellman’s controversial tale of one man’s passion for the fowl in Cockfighter from 1974. Warren Oates stars as Frank who is a mute who’s only motivation is his next hustle and this brutal sport that pits rooster vs. rooster. We will discuss this great character study with an unfortunate penchant for animal cruelty. If you are sensitive about this subject, we apologize ahead of time. The beef is back! ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

The Torchy’s boys are going south of the border to find a good woman and possibly walk away rich. In this edition, Nick Nolte plays a Texas Ranger torn between the woman he loves and a ruthless drug dealer and old friend who has eyes for her as well. In the meantime, a group of mercenaries are after the drug loot and possibly saving American freedoms. Maybe. This has a stacked cast that also includes Powers Boothe, Clancy Brown and Micheal Ironside. It’s Extreme Prejudice from 1987. It’s a fun one. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

It’s Kyle’s pick this time around and he picked a real winner. Just think if you took the movie within a movie in Demons and mixed it with The Goonies. That’s Lamberto Bava’s Graveyard Disturbance in a nutshell. Join these crazy kids as they search for hidden treasure whilst meeting all kinds of wild beings along the way. Watch with us with the link provided. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

The Beefaverasry is back with 3 reviews that include two more entries in the Christopher Guest universe. We are joined by special guests Mr. Venom and Bo Ransdell for Best in Show and Smokeshow Scott Crawford joins us for A Mighty Wind. Also, look for a new Crippled Theater featuring Ricky Morgan and Mr. No Legs. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

The Two Drink crew round on back to the planet Gor for a second time to talk through Outlaw Of Gor from 1987. When our hero is summoned back to Gor, his unassuming friend and him are framed for murder and this only leads them on uneventful adventures. It is fortified with at least 40 percent Jack Palance so there’s that. Join us next time for the Hong Kong robocop rip off Robotrix. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

With a cast of many, we celebrate the 8th year of the Beef with extra large helpings of Christopher Guest and some tasty extras. Part one includes guests Mr. Venom, Jeffrey X Martin and Ricky Morgan. https://youtu.be/-PhvpGuycaE https://youtu.be/doMVmLpbJec ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

The Torchy’s boys fall into some money and tackle this Richard Pryor jam. The skinny is a minor league pitcher falls into a bunch of money but there is a catch involved. He has to spend it all in 30 days with nothing left. John Candy, Pat Hingle and a whole slew of faces you know show up in this. Up next, we go on the road with Lightning Boy with Crossroads. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

The return of Two Drink brings you a tale of high adventure. Well. Less adventure with more hairy men. When a college professor gets ahold of an artifact, it transports him to the planet Gor. A land where shoulder pads are everywhere and the headgear is bonkers. The prof is tasked to become one of the brave warriors so they can recover a glowing rock that was stolen by Ollie Reed and his crew. Genre legends Paul Smith, Jack Palance (for 2 minutes) and douche bag Arnold Vosloo shine in this sword and sandal turd. Watch with us with the link below! ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Welcome to the world of Yor. Where massive lizards bite, the men are extra hairy and laser blasts are a thing because aliens………This is just the thing to bring Two Drink back to form. Gary is joined by Cameron Scott and Willis Wheeler to watch Reb Brown slay beasts and neanderthals alike in this strange but enjoyable epic. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

We are a literal chain of fools on the latest edition. Iris and Gary are joined by Jerry Cortez aka Mr. Venom to discuss two films where prisoners are on the run and chained together. When two inmates escape from a prison transport, they are forced to fight opposition and their own racial tensions. Sidney Poitier and Tony Curtis star in The Defiant Ones. Then, Pam Grier and Margaret Markov make a run from their abusive and very hot prison digs to plot against a slimy pimp/drug kingpin and possibly start a revolution. We get two days in the hotbox with our review of Black Mama, White Mama from 1973. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

The Torchy’s boys head to California for this installment when we cover the flick that boomed the buddy cop genre into high gear with 48 Hours. Nick Nolte is a hard nosed cop who’s dealing with two escaped baddies. He needs the help of Reggie Hammond (Eddie Murphy) to find these cop killers and have some animosity and laughs along the way. This film brings back Walter Hill alums James Remar, Sonny Landham, Peter Jason and Brion James back into the fold. The hits and the gunfire are aplenty in this gem. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Gary and special guests Lee Russell, Leah Hardy and Cameron Scott discuss two homage films…..call em ripoffs of the most popular possesion film that most people love but a majority of the panel hates. They are aping The Exorcist as we cover Abby and Beyond The Door both from the great year of 1974. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

The Beefers are back and are gonna make a withdrawal from the bank of paranoia and deception with these two features. Iris and Gary are joined by Mike White of The Projection Booth to discuss two films about finding large sums of dirty money and the consequences of taking it. In A Simple Plan, two brothers and their buddy find a duffle bag full of loot whilst on a hunt. Mistrust, desperation and death all become a factor in the gem starring Bill Paxton, Billy Bob Thornton and some other greats in this underseen Sam Raimi classic. Then, The Coen Brothers give us one of their best efforts with Josh Brolin being persued by a most menacing Javier Bardem over a large sum of money and just general integrity. You know because a psychopath has to have integrity. Tommy Lee Jones, Woody Harrelson and some other wonderful actors star in No Country For Old Men. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Join Gary and Iris for some stale nog or possibly an Irish coffee while we discuss two films in which two delinquents become unlikely stars in their respective or disrespectful forms of media only to fall from mediocrity. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Change out of your civies and load up your blanks. The Torchy’s boys are hitting the swamps of Louisiana with Jamie Sammons of Horror In The House Of Sammons to discuss Southern Comfort from 1981. When a group of National Guardsmen go on some tactical maneuvers in the backwoods of Louisiana, they start to mess with the natural order of things and piss off some locals. They start getting picked off one by one fighting hypothermia, hillbilly trap-fu and ace backwoods shooters. Look for our bonus episode coming Tuesday on the 1971 classic Deliverance. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

We are back in the fires of the boiler room once again with two installments of this hit anthology series. In Missing Persons, a girl with a heavy past is forced to babysit two brats while fighting the urge to eat everything in the house including the brats. This leads to a story about the brats’ father wanting a brand new life following an auto wreck. In The Light At The End Of The Tunnel, a loser that is afraid of the dark is forced into a job in the sewer leading into a story about a sleazy store owner forced to live his own nightmare. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

The Beef crew are back with Gary, Suzanne, Iris and special guest Derek Borgeois to throw on our parkas and go out into the cold for two features that include shapeshifters that brave the elements to terrorize people in Horror Express starring Christopher Lee and Peter Cushing and John Carpenter’s The Thing featuring Kurt Russell, Keith David and Wilford Brimley. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Derek, Gary and special guest Suzanne call in some favors and some demons and hitch a ride to Connecticut to cover Tim Burton’s classic tale of loss and possession with 1988’s Beetlejuice. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

The gang from Torchy’s mount up with the James/Younger Gang for Walter Hill’s horse abusing, saloon slinging story of brotherly love with The Long Riders from 1980. This tells the tale of end of the gang where they are dodging the law, evading those pesky Pinkertons and chasing that sweet dream. And the women. Yes the women. It has an all star cast including Stacy and James Keach, Robert and Keith Carradine, Nicolas and Christopher Guest and Dennis and Randy Quaid. Not to mention some Walter Hill regulars and some veteran western actors. W/ Lee Russell, Cameron Scott and Gary Hill. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Day 21 is here and I am going back to the UK again. This time a scientist with a deadly secret foils Peter Cushing while men are dying all around him. How are they dying? You guessed it. A giant, shapeshifting moth person! It is much more dull than it sounds. Look for me again tomorrow with Man Beast! ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Hey beefers! What happens when I get behind? You get a whole buffet of beastly reviews featuring an array of baddies including Satan himself. This episode has alien devices, deadly animals, transforming cannibals and more camp than you can handle. Guest curators include Dave James Parker, Cort Psyops, Neil Lemoi, Derek Bourgeois, Jerry Herring and Jerry Cortes. Sink your teeth into 90 minutes of fun and terror! ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Hey Legion people! Sorry I was a away for a few days but here’s a series of mini reviews including spoiler free reviews of the first episodes of the brand new Chucky and Day of the Dead series from me and one king sized one from Gav Hoare of The Podcast On Haunted Hill. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Day 10 goes to the zoo with special guest Dan Bone of The Podcast On Haunted Hill carrying the feed bag on this one. What happens when PCP gets into the water supply at a zoo? Mass carnage all over the streets. YOu get all this and more in Wild Beasts from 1984. Look for another solo review tomorrow from me covering The Beast In The Cellar. Watch Wild Beasts with the link below. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Day 9 takes us down south to Mexico to find the mysterious but adorable Beast Of Hollow Mountain. When a cattle rancher is losing his steer, a mysterious beast that lives in a mountain is the prime suspect. When he reveals himself, it is a fight to the finish with the beast with some wild results. You get ranching politics, a love triangle and some decent animation for the time in the feature. Look tomorrow for Dan Bone’s review of Wild Beasts from 1985. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Join RJ MacReady as he hits the slopes for this creature feature. When snow bunnies are getting killed by an unknown force, It’s up to character actors Bo Svenson, Clint Walker and Yvette Mimieux to hunt the beast and take him out. Look for me with another solo review tomorrow with The Beast Of Hollow Mountain. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Day 7 takes us to England for a real thinker. When a mysterious orb has landed on Earth from an undisclosed location, it is promptly picked up by UK scientists and they are baffled early. Once it hatches and escapes, it starts to abduct 200 of England’s women for it’s experiments. Decent film featuring some great character actors. Check it out with the YouTube link below. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EHRHc1Lvd9Y ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Day 6 brings a lizard beast that predates the big guy that doesn’t need mentioning. I hear he’s from Tokyo or something. Donnie Rings has chosen the Harryhausen effects driven The Beast From 20000 Fathoms. When a creature makes himself known from the depths of the earth, everyone is stymied with boat attacks and mysterious accidents. Our creature moves into the city in this stop motion spectacle. See you all again with something from yours truly on Day 7! ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Day five brings us another guest being Rik Morgan from the Hail Ming Power Hour amongst others. He picked this delightful gem. When a group of people are shipwrecked in the year 1920, they are greeted by acid baths and some gnarly looking natives in the form of cabbage patch dolls from hell. Had a great time listening to this and I hope you do too. Look for the YouTube link below. See you all again in day 6! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-z_bNcy03Ww&t=100s ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Day 4 brings us one of the great bad movies of all time. Or is it? It’s The Beast Of Yucca Flats featuring the great former Swedish wrestler/actor in the titular role as a rogue Russian scientist who goes on the run, gets blasted by nuclear radiation and wanders the desert looking for people to strangle. Simple plot for a very simple film. We’ll see you all again for day 5!!!!! ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★