Divorce Curious

Two excellent communicators. Zero good dates. What is happening out there?In the finale of this series, Lisa and Heather DeSiena bring the energy way up — because we're talking modern dating, and honestly, it's a lot. These are two women who are accomplished, self-aware, genuinely curious about other humans, and somehow still eating dinner alone. If that's relatable to you, pull up a chair.In this episode:The false abundance mindset — why infinite swiping has trained everyone to never actually invest in anyone in front of themThe upgrade trap: why "the next one might be better" is keeping everybody perpetually single and perpetually disappointedWhy nobody asks questions anymore (and why a man who can hold a real conversation in real time is apparently a rare and endangered species)Sharp edges vs. soft energy — how building a career in male-dominated spaces quietly rewires how you show up on a first date"My standards are too high" — said by people whose marriages Lisa and Heather would absolutely not wantA live, unscripted matchmaking pitch that you genuinely need to hear to believeFair warning: this episode gets a little silly toward the end. There is a Divorce Curious dating game show concept floated, referrals are solicited, and Lisa volunteers to personally vet all candidates. We are not joking. Drop your nominations in the comments.This is the final episode of the three-part Heather DeSiena series — if you haven't listened to Parts 1 and 2 yet, go back. They're worth it.And if this whole series has you doing some honest reflecting on your own relationship, grab Lisa's free Evaluate Your Relationship workbook at lisamitchell.biz/podcast. Good questions, zero judgment.Connect with Heather: Instagram: @heatherdesciena LinkedIn: Heather DeSienaTEXT ME! Let me know what you think of this episode or what topics you would like to see covered next!Want more Divorce Curious goodness? Sign up for my newsletter https://lisamitchell.biz/divorce-curiousHave a comment for me or a topic you want to see covered on the podcast? Email me at [email protected] with me on Instagram at @divorcecurioushelp

You did everything right. You communicated. You tried. You listened to your gut. And it still ended.This week Lisa and Heather DeSiena get into the part nobody really talks about — what happens when a relationship ends not because of some dramatic blow-up, but because you were brave enough to be honest with yourself. Heather opens up about being engaged twice in her thirties, walking away from a wedding with eight weeks to go, and the particular kind of loneliness that comes when the life you planned just... doesn't happen that way.In this episode:The sunk cost trap — why "we've invested so much time" is the worst reason to stayWhat Heather's corporate negotiation career taught her about walking away from a bad deal (yes, even at the altar)The silent treatment: petty power move or nervous system self-preservation? (Spoiler: Lisa and Heather have both done it, and neither is judging you)Why the people you expect to show up when things fall apart are often the first ones to go quiet"No deal is better than a bad deal" — and why this might be the most important relationship advice nobody gives youThis one gets real. Like, really real. Both Lisa and Heather show up as full humans in this conversation, which is exactly what makes it worth your hour.Part 3 is coming — and we're getting into modern dating, the app fatigue spiral, and a live matchmaking situation that you genuinely do not want to miss.If this episode has you doing some honest reflecting, grab Lisa's free Evaluate Your Relationship workbook at lisamitchell.biz/podcast. No judgment. Just good questions.Connect with Heather: https://www.heatherdesiena.comhttps://www.instagram.com/heatherdesienahttps://www.linkedin.com/in/heatherdesienaTEXT ME! Let me know what you think of this episode or what topics you would like to see covered next!Want more Divorce Curious goodness? Sign up for my newsletter https://lisamitchell.biz/divorce-curiousHave a comment for me or a topic you want to see covered on the podcast? Email me at [email protected] with me on Instagram at @divorcecurioushelp

What if the same skills that close a seven-figure deal could also save you from your next kitchen table meltdown? Spoiler: they absolutely can — and this week's guest is living proof.Lisa sits down with Heather DeSiena — former news anchor, corporate negotiator, keynote speaker, and (plot twist) seminary master's degree holder — to talk about what she calls heart-level negotiation. Turns out, whether you're closing a business deal or trying to have a hard conversation with your partner without it going completely sideways, you're working with the exact same stuff: people, emotions, and the desperate hope that someone in the room stays regulated.In this episode:Why "soft skills" is a terrible term — and why these are actually the most important skills you haveHow to enter a hard conversation with intention instead of just feelings and vibesWhat somatic awareness has to do with your next argument (your body knows before your brain does)The pattern interruption trick that can stop a scripted fight before it even startsWhy the more emotionally aware partner carries extra responsibility — unfair as that isHeather is one of those guests who makes you feel like you should be taking notes, and also like it's completely okay that you've been doing some of this wrong. We've all been doing some of this wrong.This is Part 1 of a 3-part series — and yes, it gets considerably more personal from here.If this episode has you doing a little reflecting on your own relationship, the Evaluate Your Relationship workbook is a great place to start. Grab it at lisamitchell.biz/podcast.Connect with Heather: https://www.heatherdesiena.comhttps://www.instagram.com/heatherdesienahttps://www.linkedin.com/in/heatherdesienaTEXT ME! Let me know what you think of this episode or what topics you would like to see covered next!Want more Divorce Curious goodness? Sign up for my newsletter https://lisamitchell.biz/divorce-curiousHave a comment for me or a topic you want to see covered on the podcast? Email me at [email protected] with me on Instagram at @divorcecurioushelp

If you've ever thought "is this really as good as it gets?," this episode is your answer. Lisa sits down with Melissa Divaris Thompson, LMFT, whose no-judgment social media content has been stopping people mid-scroll and mid-spiral for years. Melissa brings the kind of real, digestible wisdom that makes you feel like she was literally sitting in your living room for your last argument. From the pursuer-withdrawer cycle to why healthy couples do fight, to what actually happens when you outgrow each other — this one hits.In This Episode You'll Hear:"Love isn't luck, it's a skill" — what that actually means and why the apps are working against usThe 3 must-haves / 3 can't-stands exercise — the simplest and most powerful filter for dating clarityThe pursuer-withdrawer cycle explained — why you always seem to marry your opposite and what to do about itYour nervous system is running your relationship — what attachment style has to do with how you fightWhy repair doesn't happen — and the exact reason couples wait too long to fix what's brokenThe slow emotional drift — why "nothing's really wrong" can still be a completely valid reason to be unhappyOutgrowing your partner — is it real, is it fair, and what do you actually do with it?Key Takeaways & Actionable InsightsGet clear before you get out there. Before downloading the app or gussying up for the grocery store, ask yourself: what do I actually want? Try the 3 must-haves / 3 can't-stands exercise. Boil your relationship non-negotiables down to just six things. Know your conflict style. Are you the one who needs to talk about it right now (pursuer) or the one who needs to step away until things cool down (withdrawer)?Regulate before you communicate. When you feel the script starting, your body will tell you first — heart racing, voice rising, shoulders up around your ears. That's your cue. Repair is not optional. Sweeping it under the rug doesn't end the fight — it just adds it to the pile you'll trip over next time. Healthy couples argue and repair. Both parts matter.Wanting more is not selfish. Wanting to feel desired, connected, and seen in your relationship is not a character flaw. It's a human need. Stop apologizing for having it.Connect with Melissa Divaris Thompson, LMFT 🌐 Practice: embracingjoy.com (NY, NJ & CT clients) 📚 Courses + Free Downloads: embracingjoyconsulting.com 📸 Instagram: @embracingjoypsychotherapy 🎵 TikTok: @embracingjoynyc ▶️ YouTube: Embracing JoyConnect with Lisa Mitchell 🌐 Website: lisamitchell.biz 📲 Everywhere: @divorcecurioushelp 💡 Download: Grab the Evaluate Your Marriage Workbook at lisamitchell.biz Loved this episode? Leave a ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ review on Apple Podcasts — it helps more people find this community when they need it most.#DivorceСurious #CouplesTherapy #RelationshipAdvice #NervousSystemRegulation #AttachmentStyles #PursuerWithdrawer #MarriageHelp #EmotionallyFocuseTEXT ME! Let me know what you think of this episode or what topics you would like to see covered next!Want more Divorce Curious goodness? Sign up for my newsletter https://lisamitchell.biz/divorce-curiousHave a comment for me or a topic you want to see covered on the podcast? Email me at [email protected] with me on Instagram at @divorcecurioushelp

What if everything you thought a relationship was supposed to look like was just... a story someone else wrote for you? Lisa sits down with the refreshingly honest Melissa McClure — twice-divorced, bisexual, polyamorous, burlesque performer, serial entrepreneur, and San Diego-based truth-teller — for a conversation that will challenge everything you assumed about love, loyalty, jealousy, and how "family" can look different than you might be used to. Whether you're divorce-curious, newly single, or just quietly wondering if there's more out there for you — this one's for you.In This Episode You'll Hear:The "light bulb moment" that changed everything — how Melissa found her truth and what she did nextA glossary you didn't know you needed — ENM, polyamory vs. open relationships, kitchen table polyamory, parallel polyamory, metas, and moreThe #1 red flag on dating apps that tells you someone is just cheating (hint: three words)Why polyamory doesn't break marriages — it just reveals the cracks that were already thereWhy intentional "relationship check-ins" might be the most underrated tool in any relationship, monogamous or notLeveling up in midlife — why women in perimenopause are outgrowing their marriages, and what to do with thatKey Takeaways & Actionable InsightsKnow your terms before you act. If you're considering opening your relationship, do the research first. Melissa recommends books and podcasts specifically on ethical non-monogamy — going in without education is how you end up with five partners and a struggling business.Jealousy is data, not a verdict. Instead of weaponizing jealousy, try using it as a mirror. Ask yourself: what need is going unmet right now? Then use your words.Run from "don't ask, don't tell." If someone on a dating app claims to be in an open relationship but uses this phrase — that's not ethical non-monogamy. That's cheating with extra steps.Set the rules of engagement — then revisit them. Every relationship, no matter the structure, benefits from intentional check-ins. When did you last ask your partner (or yourself): is this still working?Opening a struggling marriage won't save it. A Hail Mary pass into polyamory typically accelerates the breakdown, not the healing. The relationship foundation has to be solid first.Connect with Melissa McClure Instagram: @melissamcclure.co 🎵 TikTok: @meldell Melissa shares openly about perimenopause, divorce, polyamory, and life designConnect with Lisa Mitchell Website: lisamitchell.biz 📲 Everywhere: @divorcecurioushelp 💡 Download The "Evaluate Your Marriage" Workbook: Lisa's self-paced relationship evaluation guide is now live on her website — a great starting point if today's episode gave you things to think about.Loved this episode? Leave a ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ review on Apple Podcasts — it helps more divorce-curious people find this community.#DivorceСurious #Polyamory #EthicalNonMonogamy #Perimenopause #Divorce #MidlifeWomen #OpenRelationship #SoloLiving #RelationshipAdvice #LivingYourTruthTEXT ME! Let me know what you think of this episode or what topics you would like to see covered next!Want more Divorce Curious goodness? Sign up for my newsletter https://lisamitchell.biz/divorce-curiousHave a comment for me or a topic you want to see covered on the podcast? Email me at [email protected] with me on Instagram at @divorcecurioushelp

In Part 2 of Lisa’s conversation with communication strategist Rachel Randolph, the focus shifts from theory to application.This episode is all about reclaiming your voice — especially when you feel stuck waiting for someone else to change, apologize, or participate.Rachel breaks down a powerful mindset shift:Moving from“I can’t because…”To“In order to…, I will…”The conversation explores:How to stop outsourcing your peace to someone else’s behaviorWhy self-compassion is the first step in real changeHow small, everyday moments reveal your deeper communication patternsThe hidden cost of self-abandonment in relationshipsWhy owning your voice doesn’t make you “difficult” — it makes you self-ledThey also discuss the deeper impact of healing foundational relationship wounds and how that work transforms friendships, romantic relationships, and even professional dynamics.If you’ve been feeling stuck, silenced, or hesitant to speak up — especially in the context of marriage or relationship decisions — this episode offers a grounded, practical framework to help you take your next right step.TEXT ME! Let me know what you think of this episode or what topics you would like to see covered next!Want more Divorce Curious goodness? Sign up for my newsletter https://lisamitchell.biz/divorce-curiousHave a comment for me or a topic you want to see covered on the podcast? Email me at [email protected] with me on Instagram at @divorcecurioushelp

There's no lack of triggering topics and conversations happening all around you everyday. And while you can't always control what's coming at you, you can have more control over how you respond to those triggers and how you communicate during those situations. In part 1 of this conversations of the Divorce Curious Podcast, Lisa talks with communications expert Rachel Randolph, founder of the SPEC method, about how our internal experience impacts the way we communicate. Rachel shares how her family dynamics during her childhood left an imprint on how she views communications, how she's approached managing through the difficult conversations with family members, and how that has led her to develop an effective framework that she now shares with others to empower them to have more control over their inner dialogue and their external communication.  TEXT ME! Let me know what you think of this episode or what topics you would like to see covered next!Want more Divorce Curious goodness? Sign up for my newsletter https://lisamitchell.biz/divorce-curiousHave a comment for me or a topic you want to see covered on the podcast? Email me at [email protected] with me on Instagram at @divorcecurioushelp

In this episode of the Divorce Curious Podcast, host Lisa Mitchell and functional medicine expert Sarah Scott-Weaver MSN, FNP-C, IFMPC, HN-BC dive into some seriously life-changing topics for anyone who is going through changes in their health and relationships. They're chatting about how functional medicine and living in a supportive community can totally transform your health journey, especially if you're dealing with stress and big life changes. Trust me, you don't want to miss this!TakeawaysFunctional medicine is like a holistic health makeover.Stress hormones can mess with your mojo, but there's hope!Find a hormone-savvy healthcare provider who gets to the root of things.Living intentionally in a community can be your emotional safety net.Women are rethinking life choices during health transitions.Your social life is just as important as your physical health.Community living can be more romantic and supportive than you think.Women are craving spaces that feel safe and share the load, and many are finding that through platonic shared living arrangements About Sarah Scott-Weaver:Sarah Scott-Weaver is a functional medicine nurse practitioner who understands firsthand how deeply life transitions—like divorce—can impact a woman’s body, mind, and sense of self. She works with women in midlife who are ready to stop surviving and start caring for themselves more deeply. Through a holistic, compassionate approach, Sarah helps women support their hormones, thyroid, gut, and mental health while embracing root-cause self-care and building a life that truly feels aligned.  You can connect with Sarah and explore her work through her Linktree at https://linktr.ee/entouragefunctionalmedicine. Inside her free Holistic Health Hub, she shares guides, videos, and educational resources on gut health, thyroid health, hormones, and mental well-being. You’ll also find links to her social media and the option to book a complimentary one-on-one call to discuss your health goals and what working together could look like.  TEXT ME! Let me know what you think of this episode or what topics you would like to see covered next!Want more Divorce Curious goodness? Sign up for my newsletter https://lisamitchell.biz/divorce-curiousHave a comment for me or a topic you want to see covered on the podcast? Email me at [email protected] with me on Instagram at @divorcecurioushelp

Perimenopause & Divorce: why everyone should care about this. It can seem like most of our lives as women, we are being controlled by a mysterious power behind the scenes: our periods! And we're really not wrong for feeling that way. On this episode of the Divorce Curious podcast, I'm joined by the founder of The Agenda Period, Alyx Coble-Frakes, and she is dropping some seriously fascinating knowledge on us about how our cycles impact every part of our lives, including and especially our relationships. Did you know that 70% of all divorces are filed by women who are in perimenopause? That's just one of the suprising pieces of data that Alyx shares in this episode as we discuss the impact of perimenopause on relationships and so much more! Give it a listen, leave me a comment, and share this episode with the women and men in your life. Connect with Alyx Coble-Frakes www.theagendaperiod.com Waitlist: https://the-agenda-period-2023.myflodesk.com/bavawaitlistBio:   Alyx Coble-Frakes is a femtech founder, speaker, and creator of The Agenda., the cycle-based planning platform helping women reclaim their health, energy, and productivity. She is a regular media guest across local and national television and podcasts, known for making the menstrual cycle relatable, actionable, and empowering — especially during the often-ignored perimenopause transition.  TEXT ME! Let me know what you think of this episode or what topics you would like to see covered next!Want more Divorce Curious goodness? Sign up for my newsletter https://lisamitchell.biz/divorce-curiousHave a comment for me or a topic you want to see covered on the podcast? Email me at [email protected] with me on Instagram at @divorcecurioushelp

Unmet needs in a relationship create resentment. Few times make that as apparent as the holidays as social media illustrates with tens of thousands of women sharing their stories of how they are so often forgotten at Christmas and find themselves met with an empty stocking on Christmas morning.  This, after having poured their heart, soul, money and sometimes sanity, into making the holidays magical for their partner and families. The empty stocking has come to symbolize a deeper issue that many women are having, the struggle between feeling like they shouldn't have to remind their partners or families to think of them versus the hurt and anger that comes from being continually disappointed. It doesn't have to be this way. There's another option: communicating your needs and expectations clearly and giving your partner the opportunity to succeed. In this episode, Lisa shares a framework to help get more of the thoughtfulness and outcomes that you want, and less of the hurt and frustration that you don't want.  TEXT ME! Let me know what you think of this episode or what topics you would like to see covered next!Want more Divorce Curious goodness? Sign up for my newsletter https://lisamitchell.biz/divorce-curiousHave a comment for me or a topic you want to see covered on the podcast? Email me at [email protected] with me on Instagram at @divorcecurioushelp

Season 2 of the Divorce Curious is coming hot!  Literally. We're going to be tackling it all: from the growing discussion around the intersection of perimenopause and divorce and what the experts on this topic have to say, to the latest hot take from Vogue that having a boyfriend is embarrassing now and all of the fiery topics in between. I'm excited to get to introduce you to all of the incredible people that will be sitting down with me this season to share their wisdom, perspective and stories in hope that you'll feel good about making the next best decision for you on your divorce curious journey. Have a topic that you're burning to know more about? Drop me a message at [email protected] or slide into my DMs @divorcecurioushelp and let me know! TakeawaysThe intersection of perimenopause and the rate of divorce are a hot topic these days (even Oprah is talking about it!)You don't need to apologize for being happily partnered or happily singleThere is a cultural shift from being proud for being partnered to being proud of being single Happiness and success are individualized concepts.TEXT ME! Let me know what you think of this episode or what topics you would like to see covered next!Want more Divorce Curious goodness? Sign up for my newsletter https://lisamitchell.biz/divorce-curiousHave a comment for me or a topic you want to see covered on the podcast? Email me at [email protected] with me on Instagram at @divorcecurioushelp

In part 2 of this important conversation, Family Law Attorney Portland Schnitzius is back with more practical and actionable advice for anyone who is contemplating their best next step to thoughtfully consider before making any big decisions. *disclaimer: Portland practices in Indiana so this guidance is through her experience with the family law guidelines in that state. This is not specific legal advice, so please consult with your own attorney for next steps and guidance in your specific situation. Key Takeaways: What the differences are between custody types (physical, legal, primary custodial, etc) The nuances of parenting time guidelines and how they vary from state-to-stateThe importance of co-parenting dynamics Alternative methods of approaching divorceHow to choose the right divorce attorney for yourself About Portland: Portland Schnitzius is an attorney licensed in the State of Indiana since 1993. She has been practicing family law for over a decade in areas such as divorces, paternity cases (contested matters between never married parents), adoptions, child custody/parenting time disputes, co-parenting disputes, guardianships and child support. She is a graduate of Indiana University McKinney school of Law in Indianapolis, Indiana and her office is located in a suburb of Indianapolis – Fishers Indiana. She is an Indiana Supreme Court registered domestic mediator, a Guardian Ad Litem, a Parenting Coordinator serving high conflict co-parents, and is trained in collaborative divorce. She enjoys volunteer work with Kids Voice of Indiana serving as an advocate for children and youth in the family court system.TEXT ME! Let me know what you think of this episode or what topics you would like to see covered next!Want more Divorce Curious goodness? Sign up for my newsletter https://lisamitchell.biz/divorce-curiousHave a comment for me or a topic you want to see covered on the podcast? Email me at [email protected] with me on Instagram at @divorcecurioushelp

Few things cause as much stress, anxiety and fear as the process of divorce. Much of that comes from the "not knowing" piece of the process and on this episode of Divorce Curious, my goal is to fill in as many blanks for you as possible about what to expect from the process with the expert guidance of Indiana-based family law attorney, and proud mom of 7, Portland Schnitzius. This isn't just your standard list of do's and don'ts, but a heartfelt and well intentioned conversation to give you a real taste of what to expect if you're considering getting a divorce and how you can best prepare yourself for what may lie ahead in the process for you. Key themes in this episode include financial control and recognizing emotional abuse in your marriage. There was so much great info that came during my conversation with Portland that this will be shared in a Part 1/Part 2 style so make sure you listen to both episodes so you can soak in all of Portland's wisdom. You don't want to miss any of this important conversation, I promise you that! *disclaimer: Portland practices in Indiana so this guidance is through her experience with the family law guidelines in that state. This is not specific legal advice, so please consult with your own attorney for next steps and guidance in your specific situation. Key Takeaways: Divorce can be a complex and emotional journey, you don't want to try to navigate it on your own.Understanding financial control and abuse is crucial for those in toxic relationships.Social media has played a significant role in raising awareness about unhealthy relationships.Many individuals feel empowered to seek divorce after recognizing their situation is not normal.The legal landscape of divorce includes both assets and debts, regardless of whose name they are in.Financial independence is essential for anyone considering divorce.The emotional toll of divorce can be mitigated by gathering information and resources.Women often report wishing they had divorced sooner after the process is complete.The level of conflict in divorces has increased since COVID-19.Therapists and legal professionals are increasingly recognizing patterns of emotional abuse.About Portland: Portland Schnitzius is an attorney licensed in the State of Indiana since 1993. She has been practicing family law for over a decade in areas such as divorces, paternity cases (contested matters between never married parents), adoptions, child custody/parenting time disputes, co-parenting disputes, guardianships and child support. She is a graduate of Indiana University McKinney school of Law in Indianapolis, Indiana and her office is located in a suburb of Indianapolis – Fishers Indiana. She is an Indiana Supreme Court registered domestic mediator, a Guardian Ad Litem, a Parenting Coordinator serving high conflict co-parents, and is trained in collaborative divorce. She enjoys volunteer work with Kids Voice of Indiana serving as an advocate for children and youth in the family court system. She was born and raised in Southern California and graduated from Pepperdine University, Malibu. She has been married for 37 years, a mother of 7 young adult children and grandmother of one.TEXT ME! Let me know what you think of this episode or what topics you would like to see covered next!Want more Divorce Curious goodness? Sign up for my newsletter https://lisamitchell.biz/divorce-curiousHave a comment for me or a topic you want to see covered on the podcast? Email me at [email protected] with me on Instagram at @divorcecurioushelp

Sometimes I get shocked. Sometimes I get surprised.  Sometimes I get both. This interview with Stephanie Sadural was one of those times. I enjoy intrigue and being surprised. Because of that, there are some interviews I do where I don't know the guest well and I don't know much at all about their story. You learn about them and their story at the same time I do, as they share themselves with us here on the podcast. Unfiltered and real. Just the way I like it!There is so much to unpack in this episode as Stephanie shares the unexpected twist and turns in her marriage, how her husband revealing he was bisexual, and then gay, created an opportunity for them to love each other and their family in a deeper way, and what life looks like now as she's settled into the next chapter of life and love, doing things in her own way this time around. The most shocking part of this story to me wasn't the revelations or the unusual changes in their day-to-day family life, it was the immense amount of compassion, love and patience that Stephanie displays through it all. I'd like to think I could be so gracious but I fear I would not be. I can be a petty queen when my feelings are hurt or someone betrays me. I hope that this episode, and Stephanie's example, challenges you to love others better, love unconditionally even when it's really hard, and embrace all the things that you love about yourself as fully as you possibly can. Takeaways From The Episode: Understanding identity shifts is crucial in relationships.Open communication is key during marital challenges.Compartmentalizing emotions can help in legal matters during divorce, it can be lengthy and draining. Support systems play a vital role in navigating divorce.Every divorce story is unique and personal.Finding peace of mind is invaluable during transitions. Acceptance is crucial when facing an immovable situation.Emotional processing can be visualized as swimming through jello.Separating emotional issues from financial matters is essential during divorce.Open communication with an ex-partner can aid in emotional healing.Co-parenting can be successful with mutual respect and collaboration.New relationships can bring peace of mind when trust is established.Maintaining friendships with ex-partners can lead to healthier family dynamics.TEXT ME! Let me know what you think of this episode or what topics you would like to see covered next!Want more Divorce Curious goodness? Sign up for my newsletter https://lisamitchell.biz/divorce-curiousHave a comment for me or a topic you want to see covered on the podcast? Email me at [email protected] with me on Instagram at @divorcecurioushelp

There are some people that you meet in your life and just know instantly that you're going to be friends with for a very long time. For me, one of those people is Kara Kavensky. I've watched Kara go through the worst things that a person should have to endure, including a traumatic marriage, and subsequent divorce, from an abusive narcissist  and the tragic loss of her son. And the most incredible thing about her, is that she moves through all of the devastating pain with a beautiful open heart and a passion for telling stories of hope and love. And joy. Finding Joy to be more specific. Kara captures much of her journey in her upcoming memoir, Finding Joy, where she shares her awakening moment, the impact of witnessing a beautiful love story between Bob and Joy, and how it inspired her to find courage in her own life. We talk about the importance of healing before entering new relationships, the challenges of divorce, and the significance of self-love and seeking out positive examples of things you most desire to have in your own life. TakeawaysKara's awakening moment occurred during her third pregnancy, realizing she was in an abusive relationship with a dangerous narcissist.Therapy and energy modalities helped Kara cope and heal during her marriage.Bob and Joy's love story became a beacon of hope for Kara during her darkest times.Kara emphasizes the importance of healing before entering new relationships.Divorce is a challenging process, and seeking professional help is crucial.Self-love and positive examples are essential for personal growth.Kara's memoir aims to inspire others to believe in love after hardship.Collecting evidence of positive relationships can empower individuals.It's important to set boundaries and prioritize mental health during difficult times.No one  person should have to endure the pain that my friend Kara has. It's just not fair. Even so, Kara has chosen to live a fully authentic life, out loud and proudly sharing her story, and help be a source of light and that beacon of hope that so many of us can use right now. Listen, be inspired, and then share this episode with someone in your life that needs this positive evidence of the possibility of finding the love you desire, even against all of the odds. Connect with Kara directly and follow her work at: https://www.karakavensky.com/TEXT ME! Let me know what you think of this episode or what topics you would like to see covered next!Want more Divorce Curious goodness? Sign up for my newsletter https://lisamitchell.biz/divorce-curiousHave a comment for me or a topic you want to see covered on the podcast? Email me at [email protected] with me on Instagram at @divorcecurioushelp

This conversation with my dear friend Anna Sutter left me jaw-dropped, tearful, and in true admiration that this brilliant, big-hearted friend of mine endured and overcame all of the trauma and pain that she experienced growing up in her tumultuous family dynamic. It proved once again that you never really know someone's story until you get a chance to sit down and hear it in their own words. We have an honest and raw conversation exploring the complexities of learning ti survive an abusive family member at a very young age, the impact the growing up seeing one parent be a loving, supportive provider while one parent is destructive and neglectful, and how those experiences continue to impact and shape you even as an adult. With a focus on finding compassion in painful experiences, our conversation aims to provide insights and support for those facing similar struggles. Anna bravely shares her profound insights on the impact of her mother's courageous decision to leave an abusive relationship. She reflects on the relief and gratitude she and her siblings felt after their mother left, the challenges of growing up in a single-parent household, and the financial struggles that accompanied it. The discussion delves into the societal judgment faced by divorced women, the importance of support systems, and the internal battles of self-doubt versus intuition when making life-altering decisions. The hope is that in hearing Anna's story, you can borrow her bravery and that of her mother to protect yourself and your children when you need to make choices that you can be proud of in the long run. TEXT ME! Let me know what you think of this episode or what topics you would like to see covered next!Want more Divorce Curious goodness? Sign up for my newsletter https://lisamitchell.biz/divorce-curiousHave a comment for me or a topic you want to see covered on the podcast? Email me at [email protected] with me on Instagram at @divorcecurioushelp

In this episode, I have a candid and vulnerable conversation with Maggie McGrann LMHC-A, NCC  where we discuss the intrinsic link between mental health and relationships, particularly focusing on the challenges women face in maintaining their mental well-being within partnerships.We get real about the true, and often unspoken,  impact of divorce on both parents and children, emphasizing the importance of authenticity, self-value, and the courage to make difficult decisions for the sake of personal happiness. Having both gone through the painful circumstances of divorce and facing the judgement of those close to us, we take a deep dive into societal expectations surrounding marriage and divorce. As mothers, we both experienced losing some of the people we thought would be most supportive of us, and were surprised to find people we wouldn't have expected to show up for us in big ways do just that, emphasizing how important it is to find the right type of support when navigating divorce and co-parenting.   As a mental health professional, Maggie shares invaluable and actionable ways to help you focusing on what you can control, shares the value of meditation for mental clarity, and highlights the opportunity to model resilience for children during challenging times. Key Takeaways: Prioritizing your mental health is a form of love for your children.Women often neglect their mental health in partnerships.Authenticity in relationships is crucial for well-being.Cultural messages can hinder personal growth and self-value.Divorce can actually lead to healthier family dynamics for the children.Support systems are vital during transitions like divorce.You have the right to prioritize your own happiness.Radical acceptance is key to moving forward after divorce.Divorce doesn't have to be a negative experience. If you're waiting for your partner to acknowledge your feelings, you'll never be okay.Accepting someone's capacity to meet your needs is crucial for your mental health.Redirect your energy towards what you can control in your life.Understanding the divorce process can alleviate fear and anxiety.Detaching from emotional triggers can help maintain your peace.Building a support network of those who understand your situation is vital.Tools like meditation can help you reconnect with your inner voice and intuition.Modeling emotional intelligence for your children is essential.TEXT ME! Let me know what you think of this episode or what topics you would like to see covered next!Want more Divorce Curious goodness? Sign up for my newsletter https://lisamitchell.biz/divorce-curiousHave a comment for me or a topic you want to see covered on the podcast? Email me at [email protected] with me on Instagram at @divorcecurioushelp

TEXT ME! Let me know what you think of this episode or what topics you would like to see covered next!Want more Divorce Curious goodness? Sign up for my newsletter https://lisamitchell.biz/divorce-curiousHave a comment for me or a topic you want to see covered on the podcast? Email me at [email protected] with me on Instagram at @divorcecurioushelp

This is the most important interview I'll ever do. I have no doubt about that. When my daughter texted me and asked if she could be a guest on this podcast, I couldn't have been more surprised. Or more afraid, honestly. As her mom, the single most important priority in my life since before the day she was born was always trying to do the best thing for her. My biggest fear has been, and always will be, making the wrong decision and doing something that will hurt her. It has kept me up more night than I can even count. I know I'm not alone in that fear and many of you can relate to that very same thing. She became the child of divorce at very young age. And while I've always tried to talk openly with her about her experience throughout her life growing up as a child of divorced parents, I know there are many assumptions I've made about what that has felt like for her. This conversation with her gave me so many insights into her actual experience, answered so many questions I've had, and change my perspective on a lot of my own feelings and assumptions I've had as her mom. We cover A LOT of ground on this one and it's a little longer than most of my episodes but I think it's worth every single minute and I hope that listening in on this raw and candid conversation can help you in some way. Nothing was off limits in this conversation and we touch on so many topics including: - When she first realized divorced parents weren't the norm- How other kids, and their parents, treated her when they found out her parents were divorced- The impact that living in two different households, with two very different families, had on how she viewed and expressed herself- How her relationships with both me and her dad has changed through the years as she realized we were just normal people with flaws and our own lives - How going up with divorced parents has impacted her view of her own relationships and what she thinks about what her future relationships and family will look like.And so much more. This is basically me having a conversation with a giant piece of my heart and my most favorite person in the entire world and sharing it with the world. It was scary. It was awesome. And it changed me in the best way. K - I love you more than anything and I'm SO proud to be your mom. TEXT ME! Let me know what you think of this episode or what topics you would like to see covered next!Want more Divorce Curious goodness? Sign up for my newsletter https://lisamitchell.biz/divorce-curiousHave a comment for me or a topic you want to see covered on the podcast? Email me at [email protected] with me on Instagram at @divorcecurioushelp

In this episode of Divorce Curious, host Lisa Mitchell engages with Leah GiaQuinta, a divorce coach, to explore the complexities of navigating divorce, especially when children are involved. They discuss the emotional challenges, the importance of accountability, and the journey from feeling like a victim to embracing empowerment. Leah shares her personal journey into divorce coaching, emphasizing the need for support and understanding during this difficult time. The conversation highlights the significance of creating a safe space for discussions around divorce and the various phases individuals go through in the process.TEXT ME! Let me know what you think of this episode or what topics you would like to see covered next!Want more Divorce Curious goodness? Sign up for my newsletter https://lisamitchell.biz/divorce-curiousHave a comment for me or a topic you want to see covered on the podcast? Email me at [email protected] with me on Instagram at @divorcecurioushelp

There is no lack of things to worry about when you find yourself considering a divorce. What if I told you there was a way to find solutions for the things that are keeping you up at night? Keep listening, there are real, tactical solutions coming your way in this episode! In this episode of the Divorce Curious podcast, host Lisa Mitchell discusses the challenges women face during and after divorce, emphasizing the importance of support and resources. She introduces Vikki Duke, founder of Insomnia Mom, who shares insights on managing overwhelm through outsourcing tasks and leveraging technology. The conversation highlights practical solutions for time management, community building, and navigating care for aging parents, ultimately encouraging listeners to seek help and not feel alone in their journey.TakeawaysDivorce significantly changes a woman's life, increasing mental and physical workloads and stress.Outsourcing tasks can alleviate some of the burdens during divorce, but it can be hard to find the resources to even consider doing that.Technology can help save time and reduce stress in daily tasks, you don't need to be afraid to find the right tools to help you.It's important to plan for future needs, especially regarding children and finances.Community is key: Women often feel overwhelmed and isolated during the divorce process.Insomnia Mom offers valuable resources  and a supportive community for women navigating divorce.Asking for help is not a weakness; it's a way to share the load.Building a support network can provide emotional and practical assistance.Rest and self-care are essential but often overlooked during stressful times.For more information on all the resources Insomnia Mom offers check out their website here: https://www.insomniamom.com/TEXT ME! Let me know what you think of this episode or what topics you would like to see covered next!Want more Divorce Curious goodness? Sign up for my newsletter https://lisamitchell.biz/divorce-curiousHave a comment for me or a topic you want to see covered on the podcast? Email me at [email protected] with me on Instagram at @divorcecurioushelp

Divorce can take the life you know and love, flip it upside down unexpectedly, and leave you wondering "how is this my life?" Imagine having a major health crisis and then having your spouse tell you they are filing for divorce all in the matter of a week. That's exactly the situation that my guest Aimee Kandrac found herself in and to say that her world was totally rocked is an understatement. In this conversation, Lisa Mitchell and Aimee Kandrac explore the complexities of navigating these devastating life changes, and how it feels when everything bad seems to be happening all at the same time.  Aimee shares her painful personal journey through a surprise divorce, a major health challenge, and the seemingly impossible task of keeping her life on track throughout it all. She bravely walks us through her hardest moments, such as uncovering a deep betrayal, navigating hard conversations with her children, and the realization that she's now living in a version of life she never wanted to be in or expected.This conversation emphasizes the importance of vulnerability, having the right support systems, and the gift of self-discovery in overcoming life's challenges. Aimee went from wondering "how is this my life?" in her darkest moments to being grateful that this new version of her life, although it looks completely different, is one she can continue to grow and thrive in. They share personal experiences and insights on trust, preparation, and the journey towards healing and personal growth after a significant life transition. The discussion highlights the necessity of being informed and prepared, as well as the value of community and support during challenging times.TakeawaysAimee emphasizes the shame and grief associated with divorce.The importance of having a support system during tough times.Life can change drastically in a short period.Vulnerability can lead to strength and resilience.Financial literacy is crucial when facing divorce.Self-discovery is a valuable process regardless of relationship status.It's common to feel lost and overwhelmed during life changes.Having professional support can provide a different perspective.Preparation can alleviate some of the stress of divorce.Emotional healing takes time, but it can lead to a beautiful transformation. Having an objective third party can provide clarity.Preparation is key, even if divorce isn't imminent.Fear often drives decision-making more than data.Trust can be broken in unexpected ways during divorce.Financial awareness is crucial during a divorce process.Emotional responses can cloud judgment and decision-making.It's important to document possessions and assets.Healing is a gradual process that involves daily improvements.Celebrating new beginnings can be empowering.Support from friends and community is invaluable during tough times.TEXT ME! Let me know what you think of this episode or what topics you would like to see covered next!Want more Divorce Curious goodness? Sign up for my newsletter https://lisamitchell.biz/divorce-curiousHave a comment for me or a topic you want to see covered on the podcast? Email me at [email protected] with me on Instagram at @divorcecurioushelp

In this episode of the Divorce Curious Show, host Lisa Mitchell speaks with mediator Tess Worrell about the complexities of divorce and the potential for a process that minimizes destruction. They discuss the emotional turmoil that often accompanies divorce, the role of mediation in providing a supportive environment, and the importance of addressing children's needs during the process. Tess shares her personal journey and professional insights, emphasizing the value of creative solutions and the power of mediation to foster healthier outcomes for families.Tess Worrell Bio Growing up, Tess often felt unwanted and unknown in her own home. She married young–hoping to create the kind of connection she wanted growing up. But, as often happens, she married someone much like from home. Instead of life with her best friend, over time she felt increasingly alone. Which gave her a passion for working with those who feel lonely and unwelcome in their own homes.When people find their marriages simply can’t work, Tess uses mediation to help them navigate divorce or separation to create two separate homes. Homes where they feel welcome and valued. For couples, who want to stay married but need a change to make the marriage work–she offers couple’s mediation. This process helps couples resolve the conflicts coming between them and transform the home they have.Tess entered mediation after serving as the Executive Director of the Indiana Commission for Continuing Legal Education. Tess worked with the CLE board to develop the training requirements for mediators. In the process, she fell in love with mediation. Especially in the family realm, Tess saw the opportunity for mediation to help families work through issues cooperatively and make decisions tailored to their unique needs and desires. It offered a way to divorce without destroying each other.As  a mom of eight, Tess knows conflict! In “mediating” who got the last cookie or which sibling was at fault for the most recent scuffle, Tess honed her skills on helping those she cared about work through conflict.  Conflict should never tear people apart. Instead, she seeks to help people find answers for tough situations while also protecting their relationships.TakeawaysDivorce can be approached without destruction.Mediation helps address underlying fears and concerns.Children's voices should be included in the divorce process.Creative solutions can lead to better outcomes in mediation.Fear often drives decisions during divorce.Understanding the legal aspects of mediation is crucial.The emotional impact of divorce on children is significant.It's important to consider the type of marriage you want for your children.Learn more about Resolution MediationConnect with Tess on LinkedInTEXT ME! Let me know what you think of this episode or what topics you would like to see covered next!Want more Divorce Curious goodness? Sign up for my newsletter https://lisamitchell.biz/divorce-curiousHave a comment for me or a topic you want to see covered on the podcast? Email me at [email protected] with me on Instagram at @divorcecurioushelp

In this episode of the Divorce Curious Show, host Lisa Mitchell speaks with Jamila Bradley, who discusses the concepts of kinship, belonging, and the dynamics of relationships, particularly in the context of divorce. They explore the importance of understanding what we owe each other in relationships, the cycle of disinterest leading to contempt, and the societal expectations surrounding marriage. Jamila emphasizes the need for reciprocity and the dangers of over-giving in relationships, ultimately advocating for environments where mutual respect and satisfaction are prioritized. In this conversation, Jamila and Lisa explore the complexities of relationships, particularly focusing on coercive control, self-worth, and the journey of self-exploration. They discuss the importance of recognizing one's own value, challenging limiting beliefs, and the necessity of self-forgiveness. The dialogue emphasizes the significance of understanding personal dissatisfaction and the power of self-validation in navigating difficult emotional landscapes, especially in the context of divorce curiosity.TakeawaysKinship is about what we owe each other in relationships.Disinterest can escalate to contempt and hatred over time.Longevity in marriage does not equate to satisfaction.Over-giving in relationships can lead to devaluation.Expectations in marriage often go unspoken and unmet.The cycle of resentment can be insidious and gradual.Articulating feelings can help in understanding relationship dynamics.Creating reciprocity is essential for healthy relationships.Entitlement in relationships can lead to exploitation.It's important to protect your energy in relationships. Coercive control often masquerades as matching energy in relationships.Self-recognition is crucial for personal growth and understanding.Challenging limiting beliefs can lead to a healthier self-image.Self-exploration requires time and patience without the pressure to act immediately.Facing discomfort is a necessary step in the divorce curiosity process.Tools like the 'clock and the gun' can help structure self-reflection.Self-forgiveness is essential for repairing the relationship with oneself.Women must fiercely defend their inherent worth.Validating oneself is a powerful tool for emotional health.You are the hero of your own story, capable of navigating challenges.TEXT ME! Let me know what you think of this episode or what topics you would like to see covered next!Want more Divorce Curious goodness? Sign up for my newsletter https://lisamitchell.biz/divorce-curiousHave a comment for me or a topic you want to see covered on the podcast? Email me at [email protected] with me on Instagram at @divorcecurioushelp

In this episode of the Divorce Curious Show, host Lisa Mitchell engages in a candid conversation with mediator Hillary Sharpnack about the complexities of divorce and the mediation process. They explore Hillary's unique journey into mediation, the philosophy of 'divorce without destruction', and the importance of same-room mediation. The discussion highlights common misconceptions about mediation, the emotional landscape of divorce, and practical steps for those considering their options. Listeners are encouraged to gather information and explore mediation as a viable alternative to traditional divorce proceedings.Hillary Sharpnack Bio:If you asked Hillary what one word she would hope others would use to describe her, it would be “Peacemaker” — not to be confused with “Peacekeeper.” Peacemaking actively confronts conflict and tension, whereas peacekeeping avoids conflict to maintain peace. No matter the conflict type, Hillary works passionately as a Mediator to tackle and ultimately resolve conflict by first identifying the issues, discerning the underlying interests of all involved, and finally determining solutions that address the issues AND accommodates the interests.Before family mediation, Hillary worked extensively in Human Resources for a large construction and mining company at the business unit and corporate level. Interestingly, Hillary encountered the exact two job requirements in every role she worked within the company — conflict management and resolution.Through her corporate and educational experience, Hillary discovered a passion for solving problems and resolving conflicts in ways that establish positive relationships, thus beginning her path to becoming a mediator.In 2018, Hillary graduated from Abilene Christian University with a master’s degree in Conflict Resolution and Reconciliation. As part of her practicum work within her master’s program, she had the opportunity to teach conflict resolution and mediation skills to college-level students in South Africa. The class focused on resolving disputes in various settings, including family, church, workplace, and community.Resolution Mediation’s approach to mediating allow Hillary to serve others on a personal level in helping to resolve conflict without destruction to the relationship.TakeawaysMediation is a collaborative process focused on family needs.Divorce without destruction emphasizes minimizing harm during divorce.Same-room mediation allows couples to communicate directly.Many people are unaware of mediation as an option.Expectations of entitlement can hinder the mediation process.Mediation is not suitable for those seeking to punish their spouse.Gathering information is crucial for making informed decisions.Mediation can be just as thorough as traditional litigation.Understanding the emotional context is vital in divorce.The mediator's role is to facilitate communication and understanding.Learn more about Resolution MediationConnect with HIllary on LinkedInTEXT ME! Let me know what you think of this episode or what topics you would like to see covered next!Want more Divorce Curious goodness? Sign up for my newsletter https://lisamitchell.biz/divorce-curiousHave a comment for me or a topic you want to see covered on the podcast? Email me at [email protected] with me on Instagram at @divorcecurioushelp

In this episode of the Divorce Curious Show, host Lisa Mitchell discusses her journey from being a body language and communication expert to creating Divorce Curious, a community and podcast aimed at supporting women navigating the complexities of divorce. She highlights the prevalence of divorce, particularly among women, and emphasizes the need for a supportive community where individuals can share their experiences and gain clarity. Lisa shares her personal experiences and the importance of taking active control of one's life and decisions during challenging times. The conversation serves as a call to action for those feeling lost in their relationships to seek support and empowerment.TakeawaysLisa Mitchell is a body language and communication expert.Divorce is a prevalent issue, with many women filing for divorce.Women need a supportive community to share their experiences.Divorce Curious aims to provide resources and tools for women.It's important to actively participate in your life and decisions.Shared experiences can build connection and understanding.Clarity leads to confidence in decision-making.Complacency can lead to feelings of isolation and frustration.Lisa's personal journey motivates her to help others.Divorce Curious is a platform for empowerment and support.TEXT ME! Let me know what you think of this episode or what topics you would like to see covered next!Want more Divorce Curious goodness? Sign up for my newsletter https://lisamitchell.biz/divorce-curiousHave a comment for me or a topic you want to see covered on the podcast? Email me at [email protected] with me on Instagram at @divorcecurioushelp

SummaryIn this episode of the Divorce Curious Show, host Lisa Mitchell shares her personal journey through divorce, discussing the emotional challenges and the process of navigating life after separation. She emphasizes the importance of education and support during this transition, addressing topics such as co-parenting, dating after divorce, and the need for a supportive community. Lisa invites listeners to share their stories and engage with the Divorce Curious community, aiming to create a space for open dialogue and healing.TakeawaysIt's normal to feel alone during a divorce.Education is key to navigating the divorce process.Co-parenting requires support and understanding.Re-entering the dating scene can be challenging.You have the freedom to decide your next steps.Creating a supportive community is essential.It's okay to not have all the answers right away.Your feelings are valid and deserve to be expressed.Courageous decisions lead to personal growth.This podcast aims to be a resource for those in transition.TEXT ME! Let me know what you think of this episode or what topics you would like to see covered next!Want more Divorce Curious goodness? Sign up for my newsletter https://lisamitchell.biz/divorce-curiousHave a comment for me or a topic you want to see covered on the podcast? Email me at [email protected] with me on Instagram at @divorcecurioushelp

Welcome to Divorce Curious, where we say the quiet parts out loud as we get real about all the things that come with deciding if you should get a divorce.  Divorce-Curious conversations cover everything from the "how did I end up here?" confusion to the "I'm a married single parent" anger to the "we never have sex" frustration and all the financial, legal and logistical pieces that come with considering a divorce. So how do you decide the next best step for you? Listen and find out. TEXT ME! Let me know what you think of this episode or what topics you would like to see covered next!Want more Divorce Curious goodness? Sign up for my newsletter https://lisamitchell.biz/divorce-curiousHave a comment for me or a topic you want to see covered on the podcast? Email me at [email protected] with me on Instagram at @divorcecurioushelp