Out Of Order

In this episode, Terry shares the devastating loss of her daughter, Jaclyn, "Muffin" ,who died in a car accident at just 17 years old. Known to many as the voice of Caillou, Jaclyn’s light reached far beyond her work as an actress. Terry speaks tenderly about who her daughter truly was,  a kindhearted, compassionate soul whose impact is still deeply felt. 

In this week’s episode of Out of Order, Cynthia bravely shares the story of her son Thomas, who died from cancer at just 14 years old,almost eleven years ago. With honesty and tenderness, she reflects on his courage, the light he carried, and the ways his absence continues to shape her life. Cynthia opens up about the journey no parent should ever have to walk: the diagnosis, the fight, the moments of hope, and the heartbreak of losing a child far too soon. She also speaks to the love that remains, the memories that still guide her, and the ways she’s learned to live inside a grief that doesn’t disappear with time.

This week on Out of Order, Lucie shares the story of her daughter, Martina, who died suddenly at the age of 20. Martina was kind, humble, and deeply genuine. She led with quiet strength, never needing to announce who she was;her presence spoke for itself. Lucie reflects on the joy of knowing her, the shock of losing her, and the ongoing journey of finding a way to carry her forward. This conversation holds love, memory, and the truth of a mother’s heart.h

At just 24, Georgette lost her mother unexpectedly.  In this heartfelt conversation, she shares how loss reshaped the course of her life.  Georgette opens up about stepping into adulthood, building hr own life, and finding her path without the anchor who had always grunded her.  Her bond with her mother continues to live on beyond death

In this deeply moving episode, Jessica opens her heart to share the story of her beloved son, Leo,  a bright, curious, and creative “renaissance man” whose joy for life touched everyone around him. Though Leo’s life was tragically cut short at just 11 years old, his spirit and laughter continue to inspire those who knew him. What began as an ordinary case of the flu soon revealed itself to be something far more serious, B-cell leukemia. Through tears, love, and remembrance, Jessica reflects on Leo’s courage, their family’s journey, and the lessons of strength, gratitude, and presence that emerged from unimaginable loss.

Tonight’s episode features Megan ,a mother who turned her pain into purpose. Jake diagnosed at the age of 3 with leukemia and died at 6 years old.  She shares his courageous journey, and the heartbreak of his loss. Through her grief, Megan created a social media support group for parents who have lost their children to cancer  offering comfort, understanding, and hope.  

In this deeply personal episode, Raegan opens up about the loss of her father Arthur, who passed away twenty years ago after a battle with non-Hodgkin’s lymphoma. With raw honesty and heartfelt reflection, she shares how his passing shaped her life, the journey of grief and healing, and the ways his memory continues to guide her today.  Raegan’s story is a poignant reminder of the enduring love between a parent and child and the strength that can come from remembering.

In this deeply moving episode, Sarah opens her heart to share the story of her daughter Ziva, who passed away from cancer at the age of 6, five years ago. Ziva was a bright, imaginative soul who saw magic in the everyday and lived as if the world were her fairy tale. She was Sarah’s fairy, full of wonder, laughter, and make-believe worlds that brought joy to everyone around her. Sarah reflects on their journey together, the heartbreak of loss, and the quiet strength it takes to carry love forward after tragedy. 

In this deeply moving episode, Amanda opens her heart to share the story of her beloved son, Dylan affectionately known as “the gentle giant.” At just 18 years old, Dylan’s life was cut short by cancer, but his spirit, kindness, and quiet strength left a lasting impact on everyone who knew him. Amanda speaks candidly about the journey of his diagnosis, the painful reality of grief, and the love that endures beyond loss. 

In this deeply moving episode, Elsa shares the powerful story of her daughter, Maria, who was diagnosed with stage 4 Hodgkin's lymphoma at just 19 years old. Maria faced her battle with extraordinary courage, and although she passed away two years ago, her spirit continues to inspire everyone who knew her. Elsa opens up about the emotional journey of being a mother to a child with cancer. The hope, the heartbreak, and the moments of grace that emerged in the midst of unimaginable pain. She honors Maria’s life, her strength, and the legacy she left behind.

In this episode, Haddi shares the heartbreaking story of her only son, Jonah. She speaks about his courageous battle with cancer, the realities of navigating palliative care, and the immeasurable love between a mother and her child. Through her story, Haddi offers an intimate look at the depth of grief, the strength it takes to face the unimaginable, and the enduring bond that remains even after loss.

In this deeply moving episode, Angelica shares the story of her son, Kylo, who was diagnosed with leukemia at just five months old and passed away at 20 months. While many followed her family's journey on social media, this marks the first time Angelica speaks openly about Kylo’s life, his strength, and the profound grief that followed his passing. She reflects on the raw realities of parenting through illness, the moments of joy amidst pain, and how her grief continues to evolve. This conversation is a testament to a mother’s love, the power of memory, and the courage it takes to speak your truth.

In this deeply moving episode of season 3 launch, we’re joined by Sara Rian—renowned advocate, speaker, and writer on grief and healing. Sara opens up about her personal experiences with loss, including the profound impact of losing her mother Susan. With honesty and grace, she shares how her grief shaped her, and the path she took to not only heal herself but also to support others walking their own grief journeys.  This episode was originally intended to air for Mother’s Day, but its message is timeless. It reminds us that we don’t need a specific date on the calendar to honor the people we’ve lost—every day is an opportunity to remember, reflect, and carry them with us in meaningful ways.

In this Father's Day episode, Jarred opens up about the loss of his father at a young age and the lasting impact it has had on his life.  He reflects on growing up without  dad shaped his identity, his values and ultimately, the kind of father he strives to be today.  He shares the lessons he has learned through grief, rowth and fathehood.  This episode is a tribute to all Fathers.

In this deeply moving bonus episode, released in honor of Mother’s Day, Erica opens up about one of the most profound losses of her life — the passing of her beloved mother and best friend Frances. With raw honesty and grace, she shares how that heartbreak was soon followed by another life-altering challenge: a cancer diagnosis. Through grief, pain, and uncertainty, Erica found strength, resilience, and a deeper understanding of love and life. Her story is a powerful reminder of how we carry the people we’ve lost with us, and how even in the darkest moments, there is light to be found. 

In this deeply emotional and heartfelt episode, I sit down with my 12-year-old daughter, Emma, who bravely shares her personal journey of loss and healing. Emma’s sister, Miriam, passed away when Emma was just 10 years old, and today, Emma opens up about the profound impact Miriam’s illness had on their family and the strength she’s found in the aftermath of her sister’s passing. Through her eyes, we hear a moving account of Miriam’s battle, Emma’s own grief, and the resilience she’s shown in the years since. Her words are a testament to the courage and love that continues to shape her, and witnessing her growth has been nothing short of beautiful. Join us for this powerful conversation about loss, strength, and the unwavering bond of sisterhood.

 In this episode, Jonathan opens up about the tragic and sudden loss of his 14-year-old younger brother. At the time of his brother’s passing, Jonathan was away at college, and the news hit him like a storm. He shares the profound impact this loss has had on his life, reflecting on the memories of his brother and the pain of losing someone so young and full of potential. Jonathan speaks candidly about the ongoing process of coping with such an unexpected tragedy, and how it continues to shape his journey today. 

 In this heartfelt episode, Michelle shares the emotional journey of losing her sister, Tammy, 23 years ago. In the wake of Tammy’s passing, Michelle initially found herself too busy to grieve, as she lovingly stepped in to care for her sister’s children, taking them in and giving them a sense of stability. But as the years have passed, Michelle’s grief has caught up with her in unexpected ways, reminding her of the deep loss she still carries.She reflects on the love she has for her sister and the lessons she's learned on her journey through grief.

In this deeply personal episode, Dori opens up about the heartbreaking loss of her brother, Dan, who tragically took his own life after a lifelong battle with mental health struggles. She shares candid reflections on their family’s journey, the pain of watching someone you love fight a battle they can no longer win, and the grief that comes with such a devastating loss. Through her words, Dori honors Dan’s memory, speaks about the lasting impact of mental health challenges, and discusses how she and her family will forever carry him in their hearts. 

In this powerful and emotional episode, Sarah opens up about the heartbreaking loss of her brother, Eric, who died by suicide. She reflects on the profound impact his death has had on her life and how, over time, she has found strength and resilience in the face of such overwhelming pain. Sarah speaks candidly about the importance of support—both from her family and the resources that helped her navigate the darkest moments. Now, as she continues to heal, Sarah is dedicated to paying it forward, sharing how she wants to support other children who are grieving and offer them the same help she once received. Join us for a conversation about hope, healing, and the power of reaching out for support. 

In this deeply moving episode, Stephanie shares her personal journey of grief and healing after the loss of her younger sister, Beth, who passed away at just three years old. Despite the loss occurring over 40 years ago, Stephanie opens up about how the impact of Beth’s death continues to shape her life and the lives of her parents. Through cherished memories and reflections, Stephanie paints a heartfelt picture of what it was like growing up with the shadow of loss, and how her family navigated the pain of losing a beloved daughter and sister. Join us for an intimate conversation about love, memory, and the lasting effects of loss. 

In this deeply emotional episode, Hadar Jennifer's parents and sister come together to share their personal reflections on the sudden and heartbreaking loss of Hadar at such a young age. They openly discuss who she was—the daughter, the sister, the friend—and how her passing has affected them, their families, and their lives in ways that are both shared and unique. As they reflect on the love they shared and the grief they now carry, they explore the complexities of mourning and how each person processes loss differently. This raw and honest conversation offers a window into the pain, the healing, and the enduring memory of a young life gone too soon.

In this deeply emotional episode of Out of Order Podcast, Vanessa opens up about the heartbreaking loss of her brother, Fabio, who tragically died by suicide. With raw honesty and courage, she shares her personal journey of grief, healing, and the profound love she continues to carry for him every day. Vanessa reflects on the moments that defined their bond, the impact of his passing, and how she is learning to navigate life without him. This episode is a powerful reminder of the importance of mental health awareness, the enduring power of love, and the journey toward finding peace amidst pain. Tune in for an honest and vulnerable conversation that will resonate with anyone who has ever loved and lost.

In this heartfelt episode of Out of Order, Jonathan opens up about the devastating loss of his only brother, Matthew, who passed away from cancer. As Jonathan reflects on their deep bond—Matthew not only being his brother but also his best friend—he shares the profound impact of losing him and the journey of navigating life in the aftermath. This episode is an honest conversation about grief, memories, and what it means to carry on after losing someone who was a part of you. Tune in for an emotional and raw exploration of love, loss, and the enduring connection that survives even in the face of unimaginable pain

In this poignant episode of Out of Order, Sandra opens up about the devastating loss of her older brother, Joe, who passed away unexpectedly three years ago. Despite their close bond, Sandra is still grappling with the uncertainty surrounding his sudden death, as Joe was found in his apartment with no clear explanation. She reflects on the deep grief that comes with losing a sibling. Through her raw and vulnerable conversation, Sandra shares how she’s been coping with this loss and the ways in which her life has been forever changed by Joe’s absence. This episode offers a unique perspective on sibling loss, highlighting the complexities of grief, unresolved pain, and the healing process.

In this deeply moving episode of Out of Order, we hear from a mother who tragically lost her 4-year-old son in a devastating accident in 2006. She takes us through the heart-wrenching details of that day, sharing the profound impact his loss has had on her life and the years of navigating grief that followed. Her story is one of unimaginable pain, but also of love, strength, and the ongoing journey of finding hope and healing after a tragic loss. This conversation sheds light on the long-lasting effects of losing a child, the process of coping with the unthinkable, and the resilience that arises from the deepest of sorrows. Join us for an emotional and powerful episode of raw honesty and healing.

In this heartfelt episode of Out of Order, I meet a courageous mother who opens up about the profound loss of her son, Austin, who lived for just 39 days. She shares the raw and emotional journey of grieving the loss of a child while also navigating the deep struggles of infertility. Her story is one of resilience, heartbreak, and the complexity of healing, offering a powerful and intimate glimpse into the realities of loss, hope, and the unspoken challenges that come with it. Join us as she reflects on her experience, honoring Austin's memory, and the strength it takes to keep moving forward amidst overwhelming sorrow.

In this deeply moving episode  we hear from Pierre Hughes Boisvenu, a father who has faced the unimaginable: the loss of two daughters. Our guest, a former conservative Canadian senator, shares his personal story of grief after losing one daughter to a tragic act of violence and another in a sudden car accident.In this emotional conversation, he reflects on the profound impact of his losses and how he found the strength to survive and continue living after such profound heartbreak. This episode offers a rare and powerful look into the resilience of a parent facing overwhelming tragedy and the journey of finding hope amid the darkness.Join us as we explore how loss reshapes us and the unspoken strength that allows us to endure.

In this deeply emotional and powrful episode, our host opens up an intimate conversation with a fellow grieving mother.  Having shared the unimaginable pain of losing her 12 year old daughter to cancer, the host shares her personal journey of grief loss and healing.

In this poignant episode, Jacqui's mom shares the heartbreaking journey of her daughter, who fought bravely against cancer,  Through her struggles, Jacqui's unwavering strength and determination to help others shine through.  Her story is a testatement to resilience and love, reminding us all of the power of hope, even in the face of profound loss

In this heartfelt episode,  Sarah's mom shares her profound journey of love, loss, and resilience. Reflecting on her life with her daughter, who passed away just shy of her twelfth birthday, she opens up about the unique challenges and joys they experienced together.Join us as she candidly discusses the impact of her daughter’s limitations and how their bond transcended any obstacles. Sarah's mom takes us through her evolving grief journey, illustrating how the love she had for her daughter continues to shape her life today. With raw honesty and profound insights, this episode is a moving tribute to the enduring strength of a mother’s love, reminding us all that even in the face of heartache, there is beauty to be found in the memories we cherish

10 days of love that will last a lifetime.  In this heartfelt episode we share the journey of a mother honoring her baby Spencer, whose brief time on this earth left an everlasting impact 

In this episode we hear from Lev's Mom as she shares her journey through Lev's illness and the profound grief that followed his passing.  She candidly discusses the profound grief intertwined with the challenges of his illness, and how she navigates the emotional journey of honoring his life

In this episode you will get to know Liam- the light of everyones life.  Liam's Mom shares the beautiful years they had with him and how they consider themselves lucky for having him.  He was diagnosed with leukemia at the age of 2 and died at only 6 years old. 

In this episode Michaels mom opens up the profound and complex grief of losing one of her twins during pregancy while the surviving child grows.  Michaels Mom is a true inspiration.

In this poignant episode Ronnie's mom shares her harrowing journey after the unexpected death of her beautiful two year old daughter..  She delves into the ongoing struggles of coping with grief and keeping her memory alive.

In this episode, Michael Steven's mom shares her story of her "beautiful, beautiful boy".  Michael Steven died shortly after his 10th birthday over 30 years ago.  She shares how the grief has remained a constant presence in her life while navigating the long lasting impact of her loss.  

In this episode Nick's mom shares how all she wants is for others to remember him in his short time in this world.  His feet may have never hit the floor but his wings are leaving pixie dust to those that look for strength

In this episode, listeners will be moved in the way Noa brought so much light into those that knew her.  Noa's mom shares the magical moments she shared with her that will forever be cherished.  These moments will shine brighter than the pain and suffering that was endured

In this episode Liv's Mom talks about the heartbreak and healing from an "invisible loss".  Her journey will show us that no matter how many weeks pregnant a mom is, the loss can be felt deeply.

In this podcast premiere, Louna talks about the loss of her daughter Miriam Lia. She was only 12 years old when she lost her fight to cancer. Out of Order was inspired to set up a platform for grieving parents as losing a child is a forever journey. New episodes of the Out of Order podacst are released every Sunday 7pm ET.